Spider-Man: No Way Home
An entire trilogy later and both MJ and Ned aren't any less annoying since their introduction in Homecoming; in MJ's case I don't know if her writing is just mediocre or if Zendaya's just as bad an actress as I initially pegged her for, but the quirky "say whatever's on my mind" shtick the writers had her admit doing for no reason really held her back from the start of Holland's trilogy. Ned's just not that funny to begin with. Marvel's gotta work on making sidekicks less irritating man because these two just weren't good in my opinion. Bad jokes. Bad actress. And really couldn't understand what Peter saw in her. But hey, that's just me.
Happy's just... around in this film. They couldn't have asked him to help with the cures I guess? I was never partial to the character anyway since his appearance in Iron Man 2 but he's still a part of Peter's support team; there wasn't anything he could be doing to help him besides arriving in time to get arrested and accomplish nothing?
The Matt Murdock cameo was nice, I'll give Marvel that much. Just establishing he exists is good enough for me. I still wish they brought back Michael Colter to reprise his role as Luke Cage but I'll take Daredevil.
Didn't care too much for Aunt May so her death didn't land for me.
Having Tobey, Andrew, and Tom just talk is one of the better parts of the film. The best joke across every film in this trilogy Zendaya got was throwing bread at Andrew. I wish Harry's death wasn't a big punchline for Ned's joke about not turning evil, and we got ending swings from all three of them. Not knowing how to fight as a team was one of the better moments in the script because two of them have largely been solo heroes. Everything got better when May died, I swear. This film was so slow until that point.
Not one joke about Tobey working for Jonah in his universe and the Spiders talking about that for an extra thirty seconds? The "I need a raise" meme didn't get a shoutout? Bruh, missed opportunity. I'd take a minute of those three talking about the press over a stupid cobweb joke from Ned's lola.
Villains are conveniently stupid when it's time to lose but I'm sure the 3v4 was hard enough to write as is so I'll forgive some especially poor moments. Electro just loses and isn't a dick anymore; Sandman had zero motivation to kill Spider-Man but just decides to because the script needed him to; Otto was a good man the whole time so his redemption was expected; who gives a shit about Lizard; Norman's bad intentions being sensed by Tom was one of the better moments in the film, where he couldn't be sure of what was going on but knew something bad was happening and reacted just in time--way, way fucking better than the nauseating gag of "uSe YoUr PeTeR tInGlE!" for the entirety of Far From Home and he just uses it at the end with ease.
Andrew catching MJ was the best scene in the film hands fucking down. The emotion Andrew conveyed when he succeeded after he failed in his original timeline and being overwhelmed by it was top notch. I miss Andrew as the lead, man. Too bad his villains suck or had shit motivations. "oHmAgErD lIzArDs ArE cOoL!" and "nO oNe NoTiCeS mE sO i'Ll BeCoMe A sUpEr ViLlAiN :c" are right up there with "Spider-Man was kind of a dick to me once so I'll fucking KILL HIM" from Eddie Brock in Tobey's third film in terms of wow, that's the best the writers could come up with???
Took Tom Holland's Spider-Man way too long to feel some form of contempt for somebody else. I never liked how he just came back from Infinity War and Endgame and acted the exact fucking same as before he vanished. Tony Stark having PTSD from the Battle of New York in Iron Man 3 was acceptable, but Peter is on a battlefield fighting aliens and seeing all this chaos and death surrounding him and doesn't emerge from it any different? It shouldn't have taken so long in my opinion to introduce a villain that he couldn't just play off.
The script keeping Andrew out of the confrontation between Tom and Tobey so Norman could stab Tobey in the back was hilarious to me. There was zero reason for Andrew to be sitting back there while Tobey alone keeps his counterpart from making a major mistake. I didn't like the death bait there. It was transparent and, frankly, pretty fucking lame of the writers to try that. Norman and Tobey couldn't have had a conversation as he returned to normal? For fucks sake, man, Harry died and they couldn't have talked about him a little? Another wasted opportunity for a stupid "le gasp!" backstab moment that accomplished nothing.
Good touch having Tom be forgotten and not ending the film on trying to reform his old bonds and instead letting them go.
Bad touch on Venom not even getting to appear in the end, man, what a freaking missed opportunity to have Tobey freak the fuck out seeing him again. Sucks that Hardy's only purpose in the MCU was transferring a piece of the symbiote there but it is what it is I guess.
It was a solid 7. The best of Tom Holland's trilogy by far, but between Homecoming and Far From Home that's not really saying much.