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Sideways(krys/lady)

Byes. Moment to moment."she agreed sighing softly as she held him. Smiling quietly as she walked with him, squeezing his hand before stepping away as he joined his in laws, wincing a little ay the idea of riding in the escalade with them, but lso glad at least jared had gotten them all into a car so he could watch over them. It was almost like he didn't trust them to behave. Quiet for the whole ceremony, jackie watched everyone, feeling numb and hollowed out, arms across her pregnant stomach, trembling a little. Holding all that pain in, emknosing it couldn't compare to what jensen was feeling. What everyone else was feeling. Looking up as jensen got up to sing as the casket was lowered into the f round, she swallowed thickly, WA Ning no more then to hold uim, but not risking it, not because she cared what his in laws though, but because she was so scared jensen would push her away, that she'd make it harder on him. Holding onto her sanity by bare threads, when all she really wanted to do was kiss him, pull him into bed and never leave the safety of being there.
 
Jensen nodded, glad she was near. It was a comfort to know she was by his side, even if right now they had pretend to be no more than friends. Slowly he was recovering.

Jensen got up to sing, softly strumming yhe guitarcas he san "yesterday" by yhe beatles and fought back tears. It was funny how life could go by so fast and cause you to loose something important.

Later that day, everyone went back to Jensen's house for a luncheon. There was all different kinds of food, and krystal's resturaunt had happily catered. Jensen sat in the corner, nursing a scotch. He wasnt even close to being over this. Krystal came over, hugging him tight. "Its gonna be okay, amic." dhe promised, simply using the romanian word for friend out of habit.
 
"It will be. Krys offered to let us move in her for while. Or jared offered his place, though he said we'd have to put up with the sound of him having sex when genvs visiting."jackie said as she joined them, glass of orange juice in her hand as she sat down next to him. Looking around, glad that mostly the others were in the dining room, glad to have the living room to themselves. Shifting to sit next to him, curling her feet up under her, snuggling close. Needing the comfort as much as she wanted to give it as she sipped her drink. To sad and upset to pretend for the momrnt, simply needing jensen, even if she knew he needed her to be strong, to be together, it was a struggle for her to even pretend she was remotely okay.
 
Jensen let out a dry laugh. "I think I'd rather stay with Krys. At least if she and misha ever get together, the walls are thicker." He replied, leaning into her slightly. It was innocent, and to anyone around it would simply look like they were offering comfort to each other. H e let out a soft sigh as he sipped his whiskey, relaxing inyo the couch. He subconciously wondered if this were the couch Misha always slept on when he stayed here at Krys's. He needed a distraction.

"Dobyou think Misha will ever tell Krys how he feels?" He asked softly, simply curious. Prying into someone else's love life helped him cope with the fact that half of his was gone forever. Unlike supernatural, when you die, you stay dead.

Daneel's father was casually walking past the living room when he saw Jensen and Jackie, the woman who had been by his side through all of this. He hid near the door, simply watching them. He had a theory, and he was trying to see if he were right. If he was, Jensen was about to get an earful. What his inlaws wouldn't know though was that Daneel had supported jensen and jackie.
 
Bhm, that's what I'm thinking. Especially with jamie here, thicker walls would be a assset."jackie snickered quietly, as she shifted to get more comfortable, sipping her juice."I think he will. I mean, he knows how she feels."jackie muttered shifting to look at him."I meN, he's not exactly subtld. Nearly as subtle as you were in asking me to move in."she muttered kissing him lightly teasing him just a bit.
 
Jensen snickered a bit too. "Yeah, I imagine Krys is pretty noisy in bed. But, do you really think Misha knows? I mean, even if she's not subtle, Krys spoils everyone." He replied, taking a sip of his whiskey. He was self medicating his pain just a little, but it wasn't enough to make him drunk or anything. He kissed her back, stroking her cheek a little. "Thanks for being here, Jackie. I couldn't have done it without you. " He added, completely not prepared for what happens next.

Daneel's father was in a tizzy. "How dare you kiss someone else on the day of you wife, my daughter's funeral! Who is this tramp anyway? She's a man stealer, thats what she is. Daneel loved you Jensen, and by kissing this whore you defile her memory!" He growled, making the whole mansion feel like it shook with his anger.
 
Btrue..I bet you 100 he knows, and he's being misha about it and not saying anything cause she's with jamie."she said looking amused at the idea kissing him back.b well be okay."she muttered closing her eyes as she leaned into hkm, biting back the moan T the tasye of whiskey and him. Startling away from him she leaned back to look up at Daniel with wide eyes, "j-jacqueline."jackie stuttered responding to the question without thinking, even as his mother in law walked in. "I knew there was something off about daneel test last weeks. No wonder if this was going g on. His dare you."April glared at them. Jackie winced a little cringing away from jensen before getting up, moving to less as April grabbed her arms, shaking her a little. "How dare you?you ruined them. You got my daughter killed!"she snarled lashing out in grief and anger, not realizing just what her words would do to already guilty feeling woman.
 
Jensen nodded, chuckling. "Probably. He probably has no clue Krystal and jamie are just together to make him jealous." He replied, kissing her back. He stroked her hair out of her face. "Yeah. We will"

Jensen looked like a deer in headlights for a moment before he realized just what was happening. "You know nothing about what you speak." He replied, annoyed and hurt. Yes, their situation had been unorthodox, but they still didn't know exactly what what was going on. Daniel lashed back at him, angry and in pain. "So you're denying what I saw with my own eyes?" He yelled back, fuming.

Jensen shook his head, taking jackie and hugging her to him. "No. I'm not. But what you think is happening isn't. Daneel probably sounded strange on the phone because she was pregnant. We were waiting until you came to visit to tell you." He explained camly, stroking jackie's hair. He knew this was probably taking a toll on her.
 
B probably not."she agreed. "How could you think this is something that would be okay?daneel wouldn't have accepted it, even if she loved you enough to try. She loved you boy, and this is how you pay her back?"April shook her head anvrily, "no. I don't believe you."she said before staring at her son in law, before sneering a little as she considered the pet ant eoman."two months along or so?" "Y-yes."jackie stuttered upset and at a loss as she leaned into jensen. "Two months jensen. How dare you treat daneel like that."April sneered, assuming correctly that it was his child,b were leaving."she said heading for the door.

"I...I..."jackie started but so upset that her stutter was back and she couldn't even form the words, swaying a little on her feet.
 
Jensen simply nodded in agreement with jackie that he didn't.

Jensen shook his head. "Again, you are talking about things you don't know anything about. If you really don't believe me when I say that Daneel was pregnant, go ask the coroner. He'll tell you for sure, and if Daneel were here, she'd tell you herself!" He was getting close to his breaking point as he spoke, twitching a bit. This was to much to handle all at once.

Daniel was furious by now. "Two months, Jensen? How the hell could you do that to someone who loved you so purely! Our daughter was the sweetest thing in the world, and you betreyed her. You''re the real reason she's dead!" He yelled, storming out with his wife.

Jensen shook his head, sighing sadly. "Good riddance. But I guess I just confirmed all of their reasons for thinking I wasn't good enough." He muttered softly, finally letting the tears come sgain. He was broken.
 
Jackie winced as she heard jensen's voice, trembling as she shifted, wrapping her arms around him, not caring what the thought, simply wanting to comfort him. Pressing a kiss to his hair as she stepped towards the door."come on. Let's go upstairs. Come on,sweetheart.b she muttered gettinghim upstairs as she tried to sooth him, hating to see him so upset as she he settled him in hed. Holding it together because he needed to, even as she leaned back against the headboard, letting him rest against her, because there were no words to fix this kind of pain.b they're wrong ou know. She didn't die because of you jen. She loved you. She understood you, better then they ever would. And she lived you, despite us. So...you know the truth. You were good enough for daneel, and she thought that. Nothing else matters."she said stuttering and stopping through the whole thing, still to upset for any sense of comtrol.
 
Jensen nodded, still crying. He wasn't at all there as he mechanically walked up the stairs to their room. He plopped down on the bed, just looking aweful as he cried. While the man wasn't an ugly crier, he was so distraught about everything that it was heart wrenching to watch. He leaned into jackie as he cried, having no intention of coming back downstairs and dealing with any of those peoples. He took a sip of his whiskey. "Even if it isn't true, I still feel like it is, Jackie. I just feel so helpless." He explained, sighing quietly. Soon the whiskey and tears would put the exhausted actor to sleep.
 
"I know.I'm sorry."she muttered watching him sleep.later she leaned against the bathroom wall, curled up over her bleeding leg, knowing she'd cut to deep but not willing to wake jensen up, to let him see as she struggled to stop the bleeding on her own, passing out as she leaned against the wall, to weak to yell for help, and trusting that someone would come check on them eventually.hopefully before she lbled out.
 
Later, Krystal camebto check on them, horrified when she saw jackie's bleeding leg. She'd started cutting again. "Misha! CALL 911! Its Jackie, she's bleeding out!!" She yelled, waking Jensen from his alcohol induced sleep. He ran into the room "Krys? What's going on?" He asked, noting the cuts on his girlfriend's legs. He hadn't had any idea she would do something like this.

Krystal glared annoyed and worried at Jackie. "You and I are gonna have one long talk when you wake up, Jaqueline Daniels. She's started cutting herself again. I thought i'd kicked her of that habit. This stress isn't good for her." She explained to jensen, continuing with her story as she tried to stop the bleeding.
 
Soon enough the blessing slowed, and as both krys and the paramedics cleaned up her leg, you could see other, smaller cuts, half healed and some still red and puffy decorating most of her thigh.


We. She woke, jackie frowned slightly at the white walls, so different from krystalk place she was confused. Before frowning as she heard the beep of a heart monitor, turning her head to look at jensen, flinching as the memories crashed into her.
 
Krystal and Jensen both relax a little as the bleeding stops. They'd take her to the hospital to make sure she is okay and possibly give her blood.

Krystal's head picked up as Jackie awoke, but Jensen was still sleeping. He'd passed out from worry. "Alright, what was it this time, Jackie? What made you do it? Jensen's beside himself, and I seriously thought I was gonna loose you. Do you even know what that would've done to Jensen? He wouldn't have been able to go on. So, tell me, who the hell do I need to kill" she yelled, but her anger wasn't really directed at Jackie. It was directed at whoever had driven her to hurting herself.
 
Jackie flicked at the anger, to hurt to tired to know it wasn't directed at her."didn't mean to...cut that deep...I fell...razor slipped....I didn't mean to worry jen..."she muttered flushed and embarassed, flexing a little, whimpering at the pull of stitches, and avoiding her friends eyes. "But...he shouldn't be. I got daneel killed...if I hadn't been living with him, she would have....i...he shouldn't care....us together, has never made sense...now more then ever..."
 
Krystal deflated, but she still was worried about her friend. "Well, that's different. Still, you shouldn't be blaming yourself. Danee's deathwas no one's fault but the drunk truck driver that hit her." She promised, squeezing her friend's hand. She hated seeing her like this, but it seemed like nothing was making the woman feel better.

Jensen awoke at the sound of Jackie's wimpering, scooting over so he could hold her. He gave her a light kiss. "Jackie, I just lost my wife, and it hurts, but I love you. Never think that you shouldn't be with me, or that we don't make sense. We just hit a rough patch." He promised, kissing her again.
 
Jackie sighed softlg, still avoiding her friends eyes, not wanting to see the anger, ""why not?everyone does....it's my fsult. You know it is krys."she sighed a little, because she knew they didnt, she just couldn't get her head around not being at blame. Looking startled as jensen woke, not looking at him even as she shifted, wanting to be closer to him, but feeling guilty for the need."...you can't mean that jen. Please....I cant...."she muttered because he'd never said I love you before, so it was messing with her to hear it now, when she was feeling so very messed ul.
 
Krystal rolled her eyes. "Ian is lucky he is nowhere near here tight now, because if he was, I'd kick his ass for doing this. None of this is your fault, jackie. Stop blaming yourself for it." She tried to soothe, eyes showing how worried she was about her. Her mental state was failing too, but she refused to let it win.

Jensen pulled her closer, getting into the bed. "I do mean it, jackie, A chuid den tsaol (uh KWHIJ den TEEL Literally “My share of life”)" he muttered softly, kissing her shoulder. Once again, she had gotten the reaction of him speaking in soft Gaelic tones.
 
Jackie smiled slightly."he tried calling me you know. When daneel died.....bell that explained some of it to. Looking tired, still recovering from blood loss. Shivering a little as he spoke, turning her head into his shoulder, relaxing a little as she leaned into him.".....that's the second time you called me something in galelic."she muttered looking up at curiously
 
Krystal frowned. "That's it. We're changing your number and i'm beating his ass up." She replied, looking much like her character on supernatural. While her character in the show, the angel of grace was mostly nuetral, when sombody hurt people she cared about, she was a scary ass bitch. Ian was getting on her last nerve.

Jensen smiled a little as she turned into him, giving her a light kiss. "Hmm, yes it is, isn't it?" He said, pulling her close to him. He needed her as much as she needed him. She was truly the "share of his life."
 
"That would be nice."jackie said smiling slightly as she closed her eyes, resting against jensen."it is."she agreed sighing softly.bim gonna sleep now..."she muttered blood loss gwtting to her as she fell asleep.

Later jared stuck his head in, smiling slightly at the sight as he moved into the room quietly. Sitting on the chair as he looked at jensen, realizing he'd woken the other up as soon as he moved into the room."...how is she?"
 
Krystal chuckled. "Okay, i'll get on that." She promised as Jensen kissed Jackie's hair. "Rest." He ordered, snuggling her.

Later, Jensen awoke as Jared came in. "Better, still getting blood, but she'll recover. Do me a favor? Take krys and tell Jamie and Misha to take her to eat. She hasn't eaten since yesterday." He told the other, motioning to the passed out blue haired woman in the arm chair. He worried for both of them.
 
"Good."jared muttered looking relieved, before nodding."I'll do that."he promised looking the two over before sighing."I just came to tell you we have a few days off, but we're still going to con this weekend. I tried, but we can't get out of it."Jared winced."contract says we can't so....I just wanted to warn you before you forgot about it."he muttered before gathering up krystal in his arms and heading out.
 
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