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Recovery (Avengers) Moon/Lady

“Oh....I’m not good with those viruses. Bruce is the bestest. He can do it.”Tony said settling a little. “It’s weird watching him like this...”James muttered quietly, watching tony. Because it hurt to watch tony be almost stripped down to the basics, like this, he was almost in a submissive headspace, reeling from his emotions still. “...Oh!good. Pepper’s awesome. I always wondered why you got so upset. At least we know why now.”Tony said sounding pleased with the explanation, smiling as james got him his food. “Thanks Jamie.” “You’re welcome tony. Just rest and eat, and soon you’ll see pepper.”James ordered smiling a little as the man started to eat, feeling sick hismelf at the idea of putting them together again, but knowing it would keep tony calm.
 
"Bruce is the best." he agreed. Bruce had already reported that Pepper's pheromone levels where dropping, indicating that she was very likely, pregnant. or had, at least, conceived. whether that means she would actually become pregnant or not remained to be seen. after all, just because sperm made it to an egg, didn't mean a baby would grow. still, the pheromones where dropping and that meant that Pepper's body was beginning to calm, it also meant that she would start to regain her own mind again and then they could tell just how badly the pheromones had really affected her. "yes we know why now. Phil and Clint got pretty sick too, though Natasha seams to have avoided it completely." he admitted. sitting with Tony until he fell asleep, settling outside once Tony had fallen asleep and giving in to a nice long weep. Bruce had warned James that this might happen, as Steve was also still flushed with Pheromones Steve might act like a rejected female. it didn't last long, thank goodness. once he'd had a good cry Steve was back to normal. for the most part.
 
James smiled slightly glad that tony had settled in to sleep easily enough, even as he wrapped his arms around steve as the man cried, sighing quietly as he rested his head against the other’s.”You’re okay. He likes you still. You know that. But he’s still fairly confused. I mean, even without the phermones messing with him, he was still having problems.”James reminded him, before urging him to his feet. “Come on, we better get some sleep while we can, he’ll be back to normal when he wakes, we better be ready.”

And indeed, when he woke tony was calmer and aware enough to read the paperwork they’d left with him, looking upset as he read it. “....Steve?What...is pepper....”He looked pale and shaken, a victim now that he was aware of exactly what happened. Feeling sick and gross, broken with the idea.
 
Steve nodded. "i'm okay now. Bruce warned this would happen. he said i would be..." here he wrinkled his nose. "emotional." he huffed. "he is confused." Steve agreed. "i'm confused too." he admitted before smiling at James, taking his hand and let the man guide him tot he bed. still being affected by the Pheramones, rejected by one mate, he chose another.

"Ton. it's okay." he promised, letting Bruce walk in too. "morning Tony." Bruce said, sitting down and watching Tony. "i am unsure if this will make you feel better or not, but Pepper has been even more affected by the pheromones she's been giving off than the rest of us. while we have long stretches of time, days, even weeks in which to recompose ourselves, she had no escape from the pheromones, which have been driving her increasingly erratic behavior." Bruce explained. "meaning that she had no control over herself or her actions. from what we where able to tell, by the time she realized what the pheromones where and that she could use them to effect people, she was already being influenced by them. by the time she was actively using them to control you, she had no control over herself." Bruce explained, watching Tony. "she didn't mean to hurt you, i don't think, her instincts where simply out of control. i have placed a pheromone inhibitor upon her just now, in another day, she should be thinking properly again." he admitted. "once she is, we can find more of a long term solution for her."
 
“..morning.”tony snuffled a little from where he was curled up in the corner of the room, his knees drawn up nearly to his nose, looking like a little kid hiding there, reading the folder, before lowering it enough to look at them. “...No...no that really doesn’t help.”He muttered sighing quietly, feeling disgusting and gross ,a victim again. Despite pepper having had no control, she’d done what so many villians had tried to do since he escaped Stane again. Break him. It hurt him so badly, to consider this, that he wasn’t worthy of the two he wanted even more. He’d already been feeling inferior, but this just proved he really was. Seeing this as his fault for not realizing it.
 
"...hey Tony." Steve said, adopting a much calmer, more soothing tone of voice and persona. "i know it doesn't help much." Bruce admitted. "i just felt you should know the truth of what happened." he admitted. "i'll leave you alone, i need to go and check on Phil. he got a heavy dose of her yesterday." he admitted, gently patting Tony's hand. "it's not your fault Tony." he promised the other before heading out, Steve shaking his head. sitting next to Tony, but not too close. he knew just how touch sensitive a rape victim could be. "i was raped too, you know." Steve admitted, voice soft. "it was during the war. i had somehow gotten separated from the other commandos. i can't remember much of what happened, or rather, how it got to that point." he admitted. "i remember what happened, how they...." he shuddered hard. "they where so proud of themselves. capturing Captain America, using his body however they wanted." he admitted. "it was months before i could let anyone touch me." not to mention what Howard had done to him, but Steve didn't want Tony to know about that. "i know this is hard Tony, i know it hurts. we'll get through it together, okay?"
 
Tony sighed quietly at steve’s tone, closing his eyes, simply listening to him before nodding. “And clint. And james. And natasha. Everyone needs taken care of.”Tony muttered sounding upset, tensing a little at the pat, but not protesting. Turning to look at steve as the man sat next to him he frowned a little. “Where’s James?” Chopping firewood. To upset and out of sorts at the state of tony, to deal with him calmly, not that he blamed tony, but his emotions were to all over the place to trust himself, so he was hiding outside. Tony stared at him, eyes widening. He’d known everything, but it was different hearing it from steve. To understand truly, that howard had made steve feel like this. Exploding into motion he got to his feet, shoving at the blond. “You have to go. Now. You have to. You’ll get dirty or something, you can’t be in here. Go!”
 
"James is chopping wood. he's still a bit... flustered from the pheromones." he admitted. "he's really upset that this happened at all. i think he's blaming himself for not realizing something was wrong." he admitted. "he's a lot like you that way, your both always blaming yourselves for things that aren't your fault." he admitted. "oh Tony." Steve looked at him. "don't you get it? i was already dirty, in the same way you are. i was dirty before i ever knew you, before you where ever even born." he admitted, watching the other. "im not leaving. i won't ever leave you." he promised. "your everything i have that's worth anything." he admitted. "you and James, your the only things that matter to me. no matter how dirty, broken or battered we are, we're all that way and that's why we fit together so well. our jagged edges match Tony."
 
“Oh.He’s a idiot. He’s not been free of his handlers that long. He’s a idiot who shouldn’t be blamed.”Tony frowned looking annoyed, even if he was indeed blaming himself for things, tense and anxious, staring at steve for a long moment as he folded his arms across his chest, shoulders nearly up to his ears, tense and upset. “No!You have to. You do. Howard was right, I end up screwing up everyone. I mean, look at pepper!I fucked up, Steve. Extremis changed, adapted and I didn’t even notice!I knew I could use tech, why didn’t I think she’d get something else to?”He said tense and upset, more then anything, even the idea of being raped again, that was what hurt him. Howard had broken the genius in such a way the cracks were rarely so clearly visible. And watching him, steve would know what howard had done. Having known his son would surpass him within years, if not months, his sheer genius more then equal to howard’s at 10, not to mention what he would do as he grew older. So howard had tried breaking him, destroying his confidence, to keep him from leaving howard in the dust.
 
Steve smiled a little. "he is an idiot." he agreed. "doesn't matter if we don't blame him." he admitted before smiling at Tony. "no. Howard was a fucker, he was the fuck up. he was the one who couldn't do anything right. Pepper being this way is Killian's fault, not yours. did you make Killian kidnap her? did you make Killian infect her with a very dangerous, deadly, experimental drug? no you did not. you cannot take the blame for everything Tony." he admitted. "and you did think Pepper had gotten something, that's why Bruce started looking into it, remember?" he demanded. "you are mine, now. Tony stark. not Howard's, mine." he promised him, holding his hand out to the other. "lets heal ourselves together. you and me and James, we can become healthy people again, if we just have each other." he promised. "let me help you. let yourself help me. we can't function without you Tony. i can't live without you." he admitted. "Howard is in hell. we are not. we have to stop remembering that disgusting freak, and focus on making ourselves good, happy, even well adjusted someday."
 
“...Well. Sorta. I mean, killian wanted her more because I was involved and he was a way to her.”Tony said frowning a little tense and upset, frowning a little. “..Yea. I know. I just hadn’t considered it was this.”He frowned a little before shaking his head, watching the other backing away, tense and upset. “N-no. C-cant. I’m sorry!I can’t, can’t-wont.”Tony’s hands buried in his hair, tugging, upset. Still drugged enough that the phermones were making it even worse, making him get worked up and angry, tugging on his hair. “Can’t. Know-know howard, can’t do what he did. Wont use you. Wont, wont, wont.”Tony muttered obviously starting to wind himself up into a manic episode, even more so then norma;
 
he shook his head. "Killian wanted her because he was a sick bastard who wanted her. you where not even a part of the equation until after you involved yourself." he pointed out. "no one could have guessed it was this." Steve admitted before watching the other. rejected again. this time he wouldn't give up without a fight. "Howard hurt me, yes that's true Tony, but you are not, and never will be that man." he promised. "you won't be using me. we'll be helping each other." he promised, grabbing Ton' wrists and gently pulling them down, away from his hair before drawing the other into a hug. "no matter what, i will never leave you." he promised, simply holding the other in the hopes that he would calm down a little. "we'll work on it together Tony. Howard isn't even part of the equation, he's dead. he won't be back. it's you me and James and that's all that matters."
 
“I should have!I figured out how to fix it.”Tony muttered frowning, looking upset and confused at the promise, so confused at the idea of not being howard, that he let the other draw his hands down and pull him into a hug without protesting. “....All that matters.”He muttered leaning into the other, starting to fall asleep as he leaned into the other, so worked up he was actually tired, extremis wearing him out more as it worked to clear his system. “We’re not going anywhere right? We’re going to take care of him.”James muttered having been watching from the door for a few minutes before moving in when he realized tony was sleeping, looking worried as he studied them.
 
"yes, you saved her life. there was no way you could have guessed that this was going to happen Tony, none of us did. not even Bruce and he's the leading genius on this stuff." he pointed out. "that's right. we're together. that's all that matters. your not alone anymore Tony. i'm here. i promise." he murmured. he looked up at James, smiling at him. "we're staying. if we do leave, we're sure as hell not leaving Tony behind. he'll go with us." he promised James. "we're not leaving him. i can't leave him..." he swallowed thickly. "James. i think Howard raped his own son... the way Tony reacted... it wasn't just what happened now. no, this was.... extreme. he's been raped before too..."
 
“...Stop being so smart.”Tony grumbled, sounding annoyed that steve had talked him out of his guilt, sighing a little as he leaned into the other, to tired and worn out to fight being held, comforted. “Good. Don’t like being alone.”he muttered. “Good. Hopefully he’ll get it through his thick skull we’re not leaving, at least not without him.”James sighed as he slumped into the wall and slid down to sit next to steve, paling as he considered that. Going so quiet you would have thought he’d totally disappeared except that he was still breathing, still functioning, befre nodding. “You’re right. This reaction to what was....wasn’t exactly rape but...was in a way...was extreme. Even for a emotional person.”James frowned staring down, swallowing thickly, “...I wish I could say even howard wouldn’t touch his own son...but I’ve seen some of the videos you know. Howard never really treated Tony like a son...simply another genius...another rival. He might have broken him....”James trailed off, hurting and upset, and wondering just how much of howard’s depravity tony had been exposed to.
 
"i am smart." Steve teased with a smile, shaking his head, stroking Tony's hair. "i know. i hate being alone too." he admitted before smiling at James. "he's been abandoned so many times James, is it any surprise he's trying to push us away?" he asked. "he wants us to leave before he gets hurt again, at least, that's his reasoning anyway. i think." he admitted, shaking his head. "it was pretty extreme." Steve agreed, gently arranging Tony back into bed so he'd be a bit more comfortable. settling in front of the bed so he would be the first thing Tony saw. "...i don't think Tony is really Howard's son..." Steve whispered. "it was in one of the journals. just a mention.... 'i wish i had never taken in that brat'. that's what Howard said. it was scratched out later but i could still make out the words." he admitted, closing his eyes. "i don't think Howard ever saw Tony as his son. just another person to dominate."
 
“No, it’s not really a surprise, it’s just annoying when we’re not going anywhere.”James sighed a little shifting to get comfortable himself at steve’s feet, simply resting his head in the other’s lap, closing his eyes, facing the door though, prepared to protect tony and steve if someone came in. “What?”James sputtered looking up at the other, before frowning, thinking that over. “It makes sense. I mean. If he really did hurt him...makes sense if tony really wasn’t his son...”
 
"well, that's true." he agreed with a smile and a shake of his head. "he'll settle down with time." he promised before watching James. "it's hard to tell really. Howard WAS insane after all. it's hard to be sure if he just... didn't want Tony or didn't want to claim him or if Tony really wasn't his son." he admitted, stroking Tony's hair, hoping to sooth the other. "i think we need to have Bruce run a paternity test. just in case. maybe it would help Tony to know that Howard wasn't his father?"
 
“....Stupid howard. I should have killed him. Then we wouldn’t be in this mess....and yes. We’ll have bruce do that.”James said frowning as he considered it, worried about finding out.

A day later Tony frowned as he let bruce look him over, and while he was tired still, he was doing okay. Almost all of the phermones out of his system, looking up at him. “How’s everyone?How’s....pepper?”he said his voice shaking just a bit at asking about her
 
Bruce smiled at him a little. "she's doing better." he promised Tony. "she has a lot more pheromones to work out of her system but she's... well, starting to realize what's happened. she's torn between feeling victimized and raped and hating herself for victimizing and raping you." Bruce admitted, knowing Tony wouldn't appreciate a lie. "we're calling in a therapist to help her through it. i'd like you to see the therapist too but i know you won't." he admitted. "James is torn between horror that you where hurt and enraged. thankfully we're in the woods and there's plenty of wood to chop. Steve caught a cold." Bruce admitted with a snort. "he stood outside in the rain for three hours. he won't tell me why." he grumbled. "i made him go to bed before he makes himself even more sick. the little idiot."
 
“...Oh. God....oh god....”Tony paled looking sick as he got up, pacing pained and hurting, not having truly thought it all the way through, realizing he’d made pepper a victim to. Swallowing thickly he frowned a little. “...No. I don’t want to.”He said knowing better then to get anywhere near a therapist, snorting a little. “Well, at least the fireplaces will have plenty of wood.”He muttered before making a face. “the idiot. I’m gonna go see him.”Tony said heading for the door, glad that the other let him out, going in search of steve, needing to know he was okay.
 
"it's okay Tony. she's not blaming you. i believe she was pondering Loki's willingness to return Killian back to life so she could kick his ass again. much to my surprise Loki actually told her he would look into it." he nodded. "i won't ask you to." he promised. "a therapist won't help you unless you want them to help after all." he admitted before chuckling. "more than enough wood. he actually cut down another tree for more stuff to chop." he admitted. okay, make sure to take it easy, i don't want you catching a cold too." Bruce ordered, letting Tony leave. Steve was laying in bed, taking a nap, or trying to. he sat up suddenly and sneezed three times, groaning and fumbling for a tissue from the bedside table and whining when it was empty.
 
“...Oh. Well.okay.”Tony said still looking unsure, not quite believing bruce, figuring that he’d have to talk to pepper himself, to see about making the woman not angry with him. Assuming bruce was trying to spare his feelings. “...I will mom. Promise.”Tony said looking amuse. “I wont get sick, I’ll take it easy.”He promised before looking steve over, shaking his head a little as he handed him a tissue. “You okay?What’s wrong?Anything I can do?”
 
"hmm. she's set several things on fire too." he admitted. "she's getting a lot better at controlling that." he admitted before smirking at Tony. "don't think i won't ground you for lip young man." he warned with a chuckle. "Tony?" Steve croaked, finally opening his eyes and gave him a smile. "hey! you look so much better!" he chirped before sneezing again and whining. "Bruce said that because it's just a cold, the Serum won't bother curing it because it's good for my body to be sick once and a while... it sucks." he groaned, blowing his nose and sagging back into the bed. "i feel like a soggy cracker..." he admitted, sounding quite miserable indeed. "do we have any juice? i'd really like some juice." he admitted before falling asleep, snoring lightly. he always got like that when he was sick, though it had been a while. even if Bruce hadn't said anything, it was easy to tell that it had been the 'incident' that had caused this more normal illness. Steve still had moments of extreme weakness and the night before he had wandered the house in a daze, trying to find his cocktail. he was still in bad shape, even if he was getting so much better.
 
”Well, she’s always done that, no matter how hard we tried.”Tony said sighing before rolling his eyes. “You are so weird.”he muttered. “Hey steve.”Tony smiled looking him over, looking down at himself. Even if he was fidgety and still feeling defiled, he was okay for the moment. “Ah, it is good for you, even if it sucks.”he agreed smiling a little before snickering. “I’m sure if I asked James,he’d agree you were always like this.” “He was.. And yes we have juice.”James said smiling a little as he stepped into the room, looking tony over, “Bed. Now.”James ordered getting the man settled in the bed next to steve with a quiet happy sigh. Well at least here he could keep a eye on them both, smiling slightly as as tony protested he didn’t need anymore sleep even as he climbed into bed and slept.
 
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