Guardian(lady/moon)

Natasha glanced up at him and then looked back down at her book. Steve had taken her aside and explained to her what had happened. Natasha knew that James had to be ready, or he'd simply pull further and further away. "he's waiting for me to make a move." Natasha admitted. "he knows i'm mentally compromised and might not remember. he's waiting for me to regain the proper memories." she explained, turning a page in her book that she hadn't been reading in the first place. "he'll send another video soon i'm sure."

Steve was laying on his desk, arms crossed and his head cushioned on them. he looked to be sleeping, which he had done before, rare though it was. when Tony got closer though, he could see the tremble in Steve's shoulders, the sweat on his forehead, and the fever blush on his cheeks. Steve was sick and probably had been for days now. hiding it so he wouldn't upset anyone until now, when he couldn't hide it anymore.
 
James growled, sounding annoyed. “Well, he should just get on with it, and give me a opening to kill him. I mean, this is killing me.”He growled pausing as he looked at her, tilting his head a little before nodding. “he probably would.”he muttered before edging closer, not quite within touching distance, but there still. Closer then he’d gotten in days, because both steve and james had been hiding from people, for different reasons, so this was hard on him. “And steve’s sick, and I can’t help. I don’t know what to do, Nat.”He muttered slumping, looking defeated as he slumped into a chair.

Tony smiled softly as he saw the sleeping super soldier, frowning as he walked closer, crouching down next to his chair, gently pushing back sweat soaked hair. “Cap?Can you hear me, captain?”He said sounding worried and upset.
 
she nodded. "Zabu is a careful and controlled man." she admitted. "so long as he isn't angry anyway." she admitted, turning another page in her book. "he's going to threaten us next, in an effort to make us move. Skye is pretty damn unhappy. however, we have a sort of a plan that involves you sniping him from a distance." she admitted. "we need to have your approval before i can call him and tell him i'll make the trade. i won't, really but..." she frowned. "i don't like the idea of something wearing my daughters face." she admitted before twitching. "what?! Steve's sick? i thought he couldn't get sick?"

"Steve groaned and cracked open an eye. blinking. "J. James?" he asked, shaking his head. "don't tell Tony." he ordered sleepily, sluggish and weak. "he'll worry too much. don't want him to..." he mumbled before going back to restless sleep. no doubt, with him not having sex for so long, his body was attacking itself. making him sick. he had kept his promise to Tony, he hadn't slept with anyone else, now he was paying for it because he was an idiot.
 
“...Can I piss him off enough to watch him freak out, then killing him?”james sighed a little, before perking up.”I can snipe him. That wouldn’t be hard. And then we can take care of the LMD.”James said shuddering a little at the idea of the ai before nodding miserably. “He usually can’t, but he’s also usually having a shitload of sex. Keeping his promise to Stark is making him sick.”He said with such anger and pent up agression and annoyance, that it was amazing that he hadn’t simply broken tony over his knee for doing this to steve.

“...Okay. We wont tell tony.”he said looking upset, flinching, and anxious as he realized what was wrong, anxiously dialing bruce.”Bruce, I need you to meet me in the med bay at the tower. I’m on my way with steve.”Tony growled before grabbing clint, having seen the man on his way in, so he knew the other was at the base. Growling to himself in annoyance as he and clint gently got steve out the back way so no one would see him, and back to the tower.
 
she smiled a little. "i don't see why not." she admitted. "but please don't upset Skye while your doing this, she's very unstable right now." Natasha admitted. "i'm worried about the number of tremors that have been occurring." she admitted. "and whats worse is when they start, she turns them inwards and hurts herself. i'd rather not have her involved at all really." she muttered before frowning. "so his own libido is making him sick?" she asked, looking worried. "i'm going to guess Steve's told you not to tell Tony." she sighed. "he's such a stubborn asshole." she complained.

he nodded. "yeah. don't tell Tony. he'll feel bad. don't want pity." Steve mumbled. "just want. him to loe me. 's much as i love him..." Bruce accepted right away, worried about what had Tony all worked up. Clint sighed as he realized what was wrong. "this idiot." he complained, carefully adjusting Steve, whom he was carrying piggy back. "oh my... Steve's ill?" Bruce asked, carefully adjusting Steve on an exam table. "he's running a high fever. he's probably dehydrated. i'll run an IV." Bruce promised. "he should be okay, his system just needs to run it's course, he'll settle down again. he'll need to have sex right away, once he's better or it will only get wore, but he's okay."
 
“Good. And I’ll try not upsetting Skye.”he sighed softly, before sighing quietly. “We’ll keep her out of it as much as we can. Hopefully she doesn’t hurt herself to badly.”Despite his mission, he still cared for her, if only because natasha did. “Yea. His own system is burning itself up since he’s not having sex...and I’ve been forbidden, on every secret and promise I’ve ever made to him, to not tell tony. I hate it when he makes me promise stuff.”James huffed a little.

“No, we wont tell tony....And he loves you. He’s just scared, Stevie.”Tony muttered gently stroking the other’s hair, looking worried, only saying it now when steve wouldn’t remember. “I know. He’s a idiot.”Tony fussed looking bemused at the sight of clint carrying the blond though, nodding as he looked at bruce. “He is.”he looked worried as he paced, twitching and worried as he glanced at bruce, before staring at steve.”o-okay.”he sighed quietly, worriedly.
 
she nodded. "yeah, i hope we can keep her out of this mess." she agreed with a sigh and a shake of her head. "i don't think she will, Tony made some sort of dispelling bracelets that should moderate how much she's able to pull back into herself." Natasha admitted, shaking her head. "but that won't keep Skye safe for long." Natasha admitted with a frown before she snorted. "well. Tony's gone to Shield HQ so he'll know soon enough." she admitted, smiling at him. "you always did hate making promises, especially when you have to break them later." she admitted. "i recall you promising me something once." she admitted. "but you didn't keep it."

Steve shook his head. "Tony will never love me. i can't blame him. i'm a horrible person." Steve mumbled. "a big idiot." Clint sighed. "he didn't want to pressure you so he hid it. but that's only made you feel worse." he complained with a shake of his head. "Tony. i hate to say this. but your going to have to stop running. Steve's too stubborn. he's not going to cheat on you unless you tell him to his face that you don't want him. we all know you can't do that." Clint admitted, looking at Tony. "you have to decide. you have to come to terms with what happened. or Steve is going to keep getting more and more sick."
 
“Good. Though if she keeps at it to long, tony said he hadn’t figured out how to stop it from completely hurting her.”James sighed a little, before swallowing hard.”Good. Maybe the idiot’ll do something.”He said looking relieved that tony would know soon enough, before flushing, staring, flinching as he considered what promise he could have broken. Cringing as he thought it over, looking a little broken as he thought about his promise to protect her, and aliana. Feeling like a failure.”...Sorry.”He muttered.

“You’re not horrible. Just a little dumb.”Tony sighed softly shaking his head as he considered the blond, looking up at clint before flinching. “I know I know okay?”He said sounding stressed and upset, “I’ll deal with it as soon as he wakes up.”He said sounding utterly stressed out, because while he was coming to terms with it, it wasn’t so much what happened that had been why he was resisting. While he let everyone believe it was, he had his own reasons that he’d dug his heels in about this.
 
Natasha nodded. "yeah i know. but we can't figure out how to stop it when it happens either. she's an emotional girl to begin with, and even after all my 'emotions are weaknesses don't feel' even i get upset, jealous and angry." Natasha admitted with a frown. "it's impossible for Skye to control her emotions so deeply she doesn't trigger anymore, hell i don't think you could even do it." she admitted to James. "i hope he does. it's not fair to Steve." she admitted, shaking her head before sighing at him. "i get the feeling we're not thinking of the same promise." she admitted, reaching into her shirt and pulling out the ring. "when you slid this onto my finger, ou swore you would never leave me alone. you would always come back to me no matter what.... you didn't keep that promise." she said, staring at him. "you left me alone. for a year and a half, two even, when i was drowning. when i didn't know my own name, or why the people around me where being so nice... when i couldn't tell enemy from friend you left me... and you stayed that way... would you ever have come back? if you didn't have a mission right now-" so she knew he was here on business. "-would you have come back?"

"not dumb. shut up James. hate you." he complained. "as long as you know." Bruce murmured gently, setting a hand on Tony's shoulder. "we needed to make sure you understood." he admitted softly. "Anna is here, if you need to talk to her." he admitted. "something is troubling you Tony, more than usual and i'm worried about you." he admitted before checking Steve's IV bag to make ure it was flowing properly.
 
"Im good. Emotions lose me most of the time. Even when I'm feeling them...its like their muted sometimez."james sighed quietly hating that they weren't going to be able to help skye. James dropped his head some,starting down. Shuddering as he considered the promise before looking up stsrtled,staring at her. Swallowing hard as he looked away."....I would have stayed...if I hadn't died myself so soon after. Going toe to toe with a god took it out of me...after...I couldn't be any use to anyone....you had your team. I was just going to mess things up."james sighed quietly pained. Flinching At her words,wondering if she knew why he was back exactly."...I would have. Eventually. Between you and stevie, my whole life was here...I just...I'm sorry."he muttered knowing there was no reason good enough for having left her.

Tony flinched a little as bruce touched him swallowing thickly."...I'm fine."he huffed a little swallowing thickly."...but...you could have anna come down and talk while I wait for this idiot to wake up. If you'd feel better about it."
 
she nodded. "they messed us up pretty bad." she agreed with a shake of her head and a sigh. "i hate how little i feel sometimes." she admitted. "i wish there was something, anything i could do to help her." She admitted, shaking her head. "there's nothing that i can do. not a damn thing." she admitted before looking up at him, surprised. "you... you actually died?" she asked, stunned. "how are you alive right now? did you get the Kree blood used on you too?" she asked, looking concerned now before shaking her head. "but i needed You, James." she whispered. "i will always need you. what gives you the right to dictate my life?" she demanded. "you left! before you died you left me there alone!" she growled. "you never even tried! you just decided hat i would have wanted when you where dead wrong!" she complained before relaxing when she promised her he would have come back. "you better be sorry." she complained, sulking at him before sighing. "i'm sorry too. i shouldn't yell at you."

Bruce nodded. "i'd feel better if you did." he admitted softly, smiling at him, carefully wiping the sweat off of Steve's forehead when Anna arrived. she sighed a little. "i told him this stupid plan of his was going to backfire. how is he doing?" "he's fine. it's just a fever." Bruce assured her. "he'll probably wake up tomorrow right as rain."
 
“We’ll do what’s best for her long term. Thats all we can do.”James sighed softly, before wincing. “Yea...it was...a bad battle. Went to battle with thor last time he was here duking it out with the dark elves....apparently, not even a super soldier can handle getting skewered on a elves’ battle staff.”James muttered before shaking his head. “Nope. Just went to asgard, that’s why steve thought I was dead, thor didn’t tell him there was a chance I’d survive what was supposed to be a mortal wound. He didn’t want to get his hopes up....so I went to asgard, under stasis, while frigga healed me...when I returned...I had to get my head right....seems stasis in asgard is something akin to....sleeping, reliving your life, rather then the frozen state I was used to. Well...”He shrugged because she knew what it meant for him to relive everything. “...You didn’t remember me!I was scared of upsetting you more. I thought it was better!”James said sounding upset, looking lost and anxious as she apologized, nodding tightly. “It’s okay.”He muttered

“Kay, well I’ll talk to her then.”Tony sighed quietly, watching bruce take care of steve as he sat on the chair next to him, looking up at anna. “...I assume I’m going to get a lecturing to from Barnes for letting it get to this?”He said anxiously, swallowing hard.”He’ll be fine.”He reassured the woman.
 
she nodded. "i was thinking of taking her to a safety retreat." she admitted. "someplace calm and quite and still and hope that she figures it out on her own. i don't know that any of us can actually help her." she admitted with a sigh before focusing on him intently. holy shit he'd actually died! "Thor knew you didn't die?" she asked, eyes taking on a predatory glint. "i am totally making him pay for that." she admitted before blinking at him. "you had to relive your entire life while you healed?" she asked, sounding horrified. "that's awful." she gently took his hand before shaking her head. "no. you where scared that i would hate you." she accused. "you where scared i wouldn't want you anymore. selfish bastard." even as she leaned into him. "but, you always where i guess." she admitted with a smile, stroking his hand. "i'm remembering more every day. Anna says it's a breakthrough, that i've stopped being afraid because the worst part of my memories was revealed to me." she admitted. "so. soon, i'll tell you how i really feel with all my memories intact." she admitted. "and if i still love you, which i know i will but your stubborn, will you still have a place for me?"

Bruce nodded, smiling at Tony. "oh. i'm sure. but it won't be nearly as bad as the one he's going to give Steve." she promised Tony with a smile. "Tony? are you okay? you're acting... weirder than you usually are." Anna admitted, looking worried about him. "come on, let's go over there and talk." she decided, tugging him to his feet and settling into the corner. she knew Bruce wouldn't say anything about anything he might hear.
 
“Hm, that might work. Tony probably knows where to go.”He muttered before swallowing hard, avoiding her look, knowing the idea he had died, wasn’t going to earn him any points. “Yea, he did. Though I made him promise not to tell anyone until I got my head back together.”He muttered before nodding.”Yea...I did....even the ice...which I didn’t think I remembered...but I remembered ice and cold and...everything.”he said sighing quietly before twitching. “...okay. Maybe I was.”He sighed quietly, dipping his head a little as he thought about it. “...Yes. If you still do...we’ll figure out how to make it work.”he sighed quietly, scared of the fact he thought she wouldn’t.

“...Oh. Good.”Tony sighed quietly, glancing at anna before nodding. “I’m fine. Bruce just thinks I need someone to talk to.”he muttered before letting her tug him into the corner, twitching a little, settling on his seat as he considered things. “....I don’t know how to help him, anna.”He muttered frowning.
 
she nodded. "actually, i have a place of my own." she admitted. "Fury gave it to me so no one else knows about it." she admitted before sighing a little. "well i'm still punishing him." she admitted. "i'm going to make him rue the day he was born." she admitted. "i'm going to start with shaving his head, and his beard, and i'll paint his hammer pink, and put superglue on the handle." she decided before shuddering violently at the realization that he could remember that. "Steve remembers too." she admitted. "he has nightmares. he wakes up screaming and everything." she said, shaking her head. "good." she stated with a smile, leaning against him. "i'm glad you came back."

Anna smiled a little. "well, Bruce does know you very well." she pointed out with a smile. "perhaps you do need to speak to someone?" she mused. "of course you know how to help him." she stated. "it's just that you are too frightened to do what you want to do. why so reluctant to admit your feelings for Steve?"
 
“that’s good. Somewhere safe.”he muttered pleased she had a place of her own, maybe they could go on vacation themselves, if she wanted him later. “...I’m sure he will.”he snickered a little amused, before wincing. “That’s just mean.”He teased rolling his eyes before nodding. “I didn’t remember alot...at least not until then...”He shuddered at the memories, swallowing thickly. “...me to. I am glad to.”he said smiling a little.

“Well. He does.”Tony fidgeted before staring down.”No. Don’t need to.”He huffed before sighing, staring down. “.....”He stared because well. There was just some things he couldn’t admit to, just how very reluctant he was to do this. “...Shield agents can’t date each other. Nor directors, in this case.”he said, hedging, but at least he was s tarting to talk about it
 
she nodded. "yeah. i haven't gone there in a while so it's probably filthy, but she could get some proper rest there." she admitted. "i'm a mean person." she reminded him with a smile before sobering. "have you been having nightmares too?" he asked, worried about him. "have you told Anna? i bet she could help you." she admitted before smiling at him. "can we just snuggle for a little while? i miss having you around."

she smiled at him. "Tony... he rescinded that order the second he became Director." she stated simply. "it only says that department's are not allowed to date within their department. so that no one can be accused of favoritism." she pointed out. "how else did you think Phil and Clint as well as Agent Thirteen and Maria Hill where dating?" she asked, looking highly amused. "i'm pretty sure you know that already." she admitted.
 
“You are a very mean person.”He muttered snickering a little, staring down before nodding a little. “I hadn’t....not until I got back here.”He muttered knowing she’d know that being back here, as good as it was, had also dragged memories to the surface.”...no. She has enough to deal with, without that.”He twitched a little before nodding, shifting to get comfortable. “we can...though I should go check on steve sometime....”

“,,,Well....good for him.”Tony muttered staring down, snickering a little. “Still think Carter is trying to get in Cap’s pants.”he muttered twitching as he stared down, playing with the edge of his shirt. “...He’s the director, you know.”he said sounding a little upset and stubborn. "he's doing good at it."
 
she grinned. "i really am." she admitted before scowling at him. "Anna, is there for you because she likes you. it's not fair for her to have to depend on you and then for you to hide things like this from her!" Natasha stated firmly. "how would you feel if Anna started having horrible nightmares and she didn't tell you and you found out later that she was hiding it from you? you'd be pretty upset wouldn't you?! don't hide things from Anna." she ordered sternly before glancing at her phone. "Steve's in the med lab with Tony, Anna and Bruce." she informed him.

she snorted. "no. i don't think Maria Hill would let her. they're in a very D/S relationship." Anna admitted. "i'm pretty sure Carter flirts with Steve for the soul purpose of being punished." Anna admitted with a chuckle before giving him the stink eye. "he's crap at being a Commander." she admitted. this isn't the first time he's gotten sick since he took over. he gets so stressed and upset he makes himself sick because he's never sure if he's doing the right thing." she admitted. "i shouldn't be telling you this, but Steve can yell at me later. he told me the only reason he's still director is because he wouldn't trust anyone else but you to have the position. since you can't have the position, Steve keeps it."
 
“She does like me.”he squirmed a little, turning his head, resting his head against her shoulder, sighing quietly. “...She shouldn’t have to deal with it. She’s already dealing with being pregnant. And everyone else. They’re just nightmares, they wont hurt me.”James muttered sighing quietly, flinching a little. “No, I wouldn’t.”he sighed quietly, before making a face, nodding.”...okay. No hiding from anna.”he muttered before flinching. “what?”He looked upset as he moved to get up.

“...Well. Good. No one gets Cap.”Tony muttered before twitching, pressing back into his chair, because he knew they were getting around to things. “I know, and he’s always doing the right thing.”he twitched getting to his feet, pacing, annoyed as he walked, arms crossed across his chest in a utterly defensive motion. “I failed. I failed so utterly they thought Norman Obsborne was a better option. He shouldn’t have to deal with being director, since there’s no one else to do it, AND deal with what shield thinks of me.”
 
she smiled at him. "she's pregnant, not an invalid." she pointed out. "and all in all she's gotten used to the idea, it doesn't bother her at all anymore." she pointed out. "so really your just fretting yourself sick over something totally stupid." she pointed out with a smile. "they are never just nightmares for people like us James." she pointed out. "good. no hiding from Anna. and yes. he's here, according to Jarvis Tony called Clint and they made Steve come here. he has a fever, but Bruce says he'll be perfectly fine."

she chuckled. "your so cute when your jealous." she teased him before shaking her head. "oh Tony don't you understand? look, you didn't fail." she informed him. "Norman Osborn bribed a bunch of people to have you kicked off the seat so HE could take it. this is from Steve's own mouth." she admitted. "only problem is that he doesn't have proof." she admitted. "so he can't do anything about it. you didn't fail. truth is, when you and Steve work together, that's when people are the happiest." she admitted. "besides what does Steve care about the opinions of strangers?"
 
“...Is there a difference?”James smirked a little, because he’d had this conversation before, and gotten beaten up for it as natasha’d tried to beat his head in for expressing that opinion. Frowning a little he nodded slightly, willing to not hide things from anna. “Good. Maybe Steve’ll stop being a idiot, and Tony’ll be smart for once.”

“I’m not jealous.”he muttered twitching a little before tightening his arms around himself, pacing as he glanced at her. “I did. In so many ways. You do realize steve died on my watch, right?”He pointed out fidgeting, frowning as he sighed. “He doesn’t. I do.”He growled. “I want to make his life easier, not worse.”
 
she glared at him. "you'd best not let Kate hear you say that or she'll smack you one." she warned, amused now that her flash of annoyance was over. "i hope so. really it's up to Tony at this point because Steve doesn't want to force him." she admitted with a sigh and a shake of her head.

"you are jealous, but that's besides the point." she decided before she smiled at him. "you do realize Steve's death couldn't have been prevented when he wanted to die anyway right?" she asked. "he chose to do what he did because he wanted to die Tony. that is no reference to your ability to be a leader. you are a good leader, you just have to settle down and realize how much good you've really done." she admitted. "besides, this? what your doing now? it's not making Steve's life easier, if anything our complicating it even more. whatever your hiding, whatever reason you don't want to be with Steve, you either have to own up to it, or get over it." she warned him. "or your never going to be happy and he's never going to give up."
 
“Hm, I know. At least this time I didn’t get decked for it. You did that the first time I said it.”He muttered before nodding, “I think tony’s finally starting to be worn down...hopefully this gives him a kick.”

“...I made a mistake. Enforced a law that was wrong. It was, and I got my best friend killed.”Tony twitched swallowing hard, giving the other a look. “I’m trying to help him.”He twitched, swallowing hard, slumping into his chair, wanting to drink, really wanting it, but not giving in the need to go find it. “....I destroy everything I get near....I got James killed, no matter that he’s pretending that he hadn’t died, I got steve killed once, my parents died coming to visit me...I nearly got the whole world killed because I didn’t know the Skrulls were there until they were to late, despite being the smartest person in the world...why do I get to be happy...?”He said, because more then anything, he was so so afraid of actually caring.
 
she smirked. "i should deck you for it in Anna's honor." she admitted with a smile before nodding. "i hope so... if it was just stubbornness though, Tony would have given in forever ago.... something else is wrong." she admitted. "i just hope Tony can get through it."

she shook her head. "everyone makes mistakes, but you can't be sure that you made the wrong choice. do you have any idea how many lives you actually saved with that Law?" she asked. "do you have any idea that you literally stopped a war?" she asked. "James died because he was reckless in the face of Natasha forgetting him. your parents died because Obediah sold them out. Steve died because he wanted to and nothing could have stopped the Skrulls, even if you had known they where coming people would still have died and they would still have invaded." she stated. "you cannot blame yourself for everything that happens Tony. not everything is your fault and in any case who said this had anything to do with you being happy?" she asked. "consider this. Steve won't be happy with anyone else. so really, your not making yourself Happy. your making Steve Happy."
 
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