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love is blind (moon/lady)

“...You guys live to long. I think that’s part of your problem.”Phil said tilting his head a little.”You have so many years to live, to simply be, what’s the point of being better? Where humanity, we only get a few years to do everything. Makes us a little desperate to do things.”Phil said thoughtfully. “Really?I hould do that. That would be fun.”Tony said looking interested at the idea of traveling. “And what are we being perverted over?”Kate said raising a eyebrow, blushing as she realized she was flirting in front of clint’s ex. Feeling awkward and out of sorts.
 
Thor nodded. "that and poor thinking." he admitted. "after all, Loki and i are just as old as most of the rest of them and we certainly don't think like that. it's mostly a superiority complex. they'll learn eventually just how wrong they really are." he admitted. "besides, it's not humanities lifespans that make you so amazing. it's the fact that every human born seams to be born with a desire to better themselves. from the moment you learn to crawl, you are always reaching to do better." he admitted. "first crawling, then walking, then running, learning and growing at extraordinary paces." he grinned at Tony. "i'm sure Loki would love to help you with that. especially if it means he can visit Hel anytime he wants to." he admitted. "we're being perverted about you of course." Clint informed Kate with a grin.
 
“Eventually.Hopefully it wont hurt them to badly.”Tony said smiling a little, as he considered that. “We’ll figure it out, just so he can do that. No father should go withotu their child.”Tony agreed, smiling a little. “oh, and about what?” “Oh, you know. This and that. And clint want’s handcuffed.” “what?” “oh yes.”phil smirked, looking amused just to see kate blushing so much, it was quite adorable really.
 
"oh i'm hoping it hurts them a lot." Thor admitted. "it would serve them right for all the pain and agony they put Loki, and humans, through." he admitted with a sniff before smiling. "oh, it's not that bad. he still travels to see her often enough, and they talk through the streams all the time. she had to close Helhiem up, after a Necromancer cracked open the deepest pits and freed some of the nastiest souls the nine realms had to offer." he admitted. "she only barely managed to reclaim the souls before they did untold damage, she still hasn't found all of them." he admitted. "Loki helped her seal it, seclusion was better than the end of the world after all." he admitted before blinking at Clint and Phil and Kate. "what?! i do not!" Clint protested, even as he wrapped one hand around his wrist, as if envisioning how awesome that would feel.
 
“Well, when you put it that way....”Tony snickered a little before frowning at the idea of souls getting lose. “that’s weird.”Tony said making a face, before tilting his head as he watched phil looking around for something. “Yes, world ending would be bad.”Tony snickered a little watching the three. “...You so do.”Phil snickered a little, looking pleased and happy for them, even if it hurt, it was good to know clint had someone. “Clint?”kate raised a eyebrow, looking amused.
 
Thor nodded. "it was a decision for Hel to lock off her realm and sequester herself. she rarely leaves because the threat of the evil souls being released is very serious, and is still something that might easily happen." he admitted. "there have been a lot of people who became hosts for the evil souls who where released. Jack the Ripper for example, and Pedro López, some of the most depraved humans that have walked this earth, is because one evil soul possessed another evil soul." he admitted before chuckling at Clint's antics. "...it's nothing!" Clint protested, blushing harder. he wasn't sure he wanted Kate to know how quickly he'd drop int subspace when he was tied up or handcuffed by someone he loved and trusted. he wasn't sure he was ready for her to see him like that.
 
“...that’s both interesting and horrible all at once. I mean....as a study, to see how and why it happens. The possession I mean...”Tony said looking thoughtful and amused, before sighing quietly, shaking his head a little as he watched clint. “....?”Kate frowned a little tilting her head, confused and a tad hurt. Phil sighed watching them, tilting his head even as he twitched, the need to carve starting to get to him. “It’s okay. We’re just teasing him.”Phil sighed shaking his head a little, willing to cover for clint, until he was ready.
 
Thor nodded. "i think Hela and Loki did some fundamental research, but Loki doesn't know much about souls. living or dead, so he left it to Hela." he admitted. "you could ask him for copies of the research i'm sure." "Phil? are you okay? you're... twitching. you never twitch..." Clint admitted, looking worried before glancing at Kate and sighing, torn between who to comfort first. "i'll take Phil to Bruce." Thor decided. "or would Loki be better? being it's the blood of the Kree we're dealing with, Loki would probably be better." Thor admitted. "come, Son of Coul." Thor suggested. my bother needs to run a few tests on your blood anyway, the sooner that's done the sooner we can see if we can remove the black blood from you." "Kate?...." Clint asked, voice soft. "i... i guess i need to tell you something... only i'm scared if i do, you'll be scared, or maybe angry with me..." he admitted, fidgeting nervously.
 
Phil winced a little, swallowing hard. “I want...to carve. Need to.”phil said tilting his head a little, sighing a little as he watched the other trying to decide what to do. Tilting his head towards thor he nodded. “Loki. Maybe he can figure out the carvings if he sees them.”He said following thor. “...Well...I didn’t freak out when you admitted to loving me...or anything else that’s happened to me...so...just tell me.”She said looking at him, looking upset and worried about what was going on. Afraid he was going to tell her something truly bad.
 
Thor blinked a little. "carve? oh! yes. i forgot i'm sorry." he admitted. "i think Tony set up a room for you to carve in, didn't you Tony?" Thor asked. "we could take Phil there and then take Loki to the observation room."

Clint nodded. "yeah... but this is a bit..." he shook his head and took a deep breath. "i have a serious submissive complex. i need to be dropped placed into a subspace after certain emotional events or i loose control of myself, of sorts. i get twitchy, fidgety, anxious, upset...." as in, now. Phil coming back had probably shaken him, a lot. "i can't always tell when i need to go down, so my lover needs to be able to recognize the signs at take control because i can't..." he admitted. "and i know most women don't like that and i can't ask you to... not when i've taken so much from you already..."
 
“Yes.”phil said looking a little twitchy and upset because he was, because it screwed with him to not be in control. “I did. Let’s take him downstairs, and we’ll get loki.”Tony said smiling a little as he showed phil down to the room, knowing thor would get loki.

“oh...”Kate frowned a little, thinking about it. Looking confused and lost, reaching out for his hand, sliding her fingers into his, tugging him closer. “...I don’t know. If I do. Or not. I love you. I want to help...I just don’t know how.”She said leaning into him a little. “Can you...help me recognize it?And what to do?And we’ll go from there?”she said worried that she'd screw up, and mess up the best thing in her life.
 
Thor nodded and went to go get Loki, who was more than happy to go and watch Phil draw, taking a ethereal of notes while he watched the other.

Clint nodded and blinked when she pulled him closer. "oh... i love you too." he admitted, a little surprised that she wasn't yelling at him. "i... that's the problem. i rarely realize it for myself." he admitted, shaking his head. "i don't really know how to drop myself i... oh... Natasha knows how. Phil taught her, in case he couldn't be there... she could teach you maybe? since i'm sure you don't want Phil that intimate with me." he admitted with a smile. "she could give you lessons and see if your okay with it... im just glad your not screaming really..." he admitted softly.
 
Kate smiled a little, resting her head on his shoulder, sighing quietly. “Oh.Well...”She said sounding quietly upset, not at him, but because she didn’t know how to help him. “I’ll ask her...and...would you prefer phil help?”She asked watching him, before sighing quietly, resting her head against his shoulder. “I just want you to be happy, clint. If that means learning something new to help...I can do that.”She said smiling a little.
 
he nodded a little. "yeah..." he blinked at her. "honestly? i don't know if that would be better, or worse, getting Phil involved..." he admitted, shaking his head. "i just don't know anymore." he admitted, leaning into her, wrapping his arms around her "i don't want to lose you. i don't think i could bare it if i lost you...." he admitted.
 
“...we could ask him. I mean...if we don’t know, as bad as he’s feeling now...phil was always good at figuring out how things are, and what needs done.”kate said sighing quietly, holding onto him, sniffling a little, swallowing thickly as she closed her eyes, clinging to him.”...don’t think I could lose you either. I...I don’t think I’d do well.”She muttered, because while matt had offered, and they got along, the woman knew that if she lost clint, it would destroy part of her.
 
he shrugged. "if you want to. i guess." he agreed. "he's taken care of me for a long time." he admitted. "he would probably be the best person to talk to, but i don't know if you could handle that, really." he admitted before wrapping his arms around her. "i'm sorry i'm so broken." he murmured. "i'll get better for you. i swear." he promised. he'd do his best to be better, just for her. "come on. i think we need a nap, or at least some snuggle times." he admitted, smiling at her. "we can snuggle for a while, right?" he asked hopefully.

"Phil, right?" Loki asked, walking into the room where Phil had finished carving, keeping his distance. "do you mind if i ask you a few questions while the carving is fresh on your mind?" he asked the other. "how do you feel when you carve?" he asked curiously. "is it a happy feeling or an angry one for example?"
 
“I don’t know....I just want what’s best for you.even if it means talking to phil...”She sighed quietly as she leaned into him, “You don’t have to. Just be yourself, Clint. That’s all I want.”She said smiling back, nodding. “Oh yea, snuggles would be good....and plotting how to get matt together with pepper, even better.”She smield.

“Yes.”phil looked up from the finished carving, frowning slightly. “No, I don’t.Go ahead, ask.”He sighed softly. “I feel...driven. Needy, but not...it’s not angry or happy, simply desperate to get the message out.”He frowned slightly.
 
she nodded. "yes. okay." he agreed softly, shaking his head a little. "i don't want you to be upset either you know..." he admitted, blinking at her. "i don't want you to hurt either." he kissed her gently and smiled, leading the way to his room. "hey... where you can sort of see.. there's someplace i wanna show you." he admitted, glancing around to make sure they where alone before sliding into his vent and giving her a hand up. "it's this way." he informed her. he left the way through a series of twisting vents until they came out into a massive opening, like a little cave, which was full of thick fluffy blankets and pillows and had shining rhinestones laying in little piles all over the place. "this is my haven." he admitted with a smile. "you can come here anytime you like." he promised her with a smile.

Loki nodded. "no emotional connections at all?" he asked. "how curious..." he muttered writing that down. "is there any form of pain when you carve? cramps that occur, sharp pains anywhere on your body? aches that vanish as soon as our done?" he asked, looking at Phil. "are there any senses of Dejavu or repetition? any memories that you experience while doing this? odd thoughts or weird behaviors you might have noticed? aside from the carving itself of course."
 
“I know. We’ll figure it out. And go from there.”She smiled a little kissing him back, blushing softly as she followed him. “Yea, I can. It’s weird really.”kate said tilting her head, looking amused and interested as she took his hand, letting him help her through, eyes wide as she loked around her, hands reaching out, gently stroking the blankets.”We should snuggle in here.”she decided, blushing a little at the knowledge she could come here whenever she wanted.

“No...”Phil said before wincing. “My hand cramps, my head hurts...”Phil said blinking slowly, swallowing hard. “My chest hurts then stops when I finish...”he sighed a little. “and I feel like I’m drawing something over and over, like...I know what I should be seeing, but I can’t translate into something for me to read.”
 
he nodded. "okay." he agreed softly, smiling at her. she always made him feel so much better about, well, everything really. "weird?" he asked curiously. "does it hurt when you do it?" he asked, curious, and a little bit worried about her. "...you have the best ideas." he admitted happily, nudging the blankets around so there was room for both of them and then settled into the little cocoon/nest he'd made. snuggling her in his most safe place, there was nothing better.

"...your head hurts?" he asked, nodding a little. "yes that would make sense..." he admitted, writing that down. "how interesting. your chest hurts?" he asked before nodding. "well. it might not be too hard." he admitted, examining the drawings. "your head and chest hurt, you feel no emotions and you can't make sense of what your drawing, i'm assuming your in a sort of a haze, like your dreaming, coming in and out of focus while your doing this?" he asked the other. "it's because your fighting the pull. the Kree Blood is strong, but your ill and dominion over it is stronger, allowing you to mentally fight back against the control that is being attempted upon you. it can be dangerous, if you do it for too long, you could have aneurisms, heart failure or strokes. you haven't been at it long enough to worry just yet, but it means we'll have to find the solution in the next year or so." he admitted. "in the mean time." he examined the markings on the wall. "yes. i thought so. you can't make sense of it because two locations are both trying to call out to you." he admitted. "the signals are getting all jangled together, meaning you can't make sense of either one. that's probably a good thing for now. it will lesson the stress on your body." he admitted, smiling at Phil. "in the meantime, i have herbal teas that can help with the compulsion and the anger issues that come with it."
 
“Yea, weird...and no. Not...really. I mean, it sometimes gives me a headache when I hear to many things at once...but...it’s just...I went for the first 25 years of my life with sight, I keep...trying to fill in the blanks with what I’m ‘seeing’ to what I know it’s really like....like I know your hair is so blond it’s nearly white in the summer, or you have a scar here...”She touched his temple as they snuggled into the blankets, sighing quietly as she settled into the cocoon, “But...I can’t see it. It’s not something sound picks up, so it’s...different.”

“Yea, the longer I carve, the more it hurts.”Phil said frowning a little before nodding, “Yes. It’s like....I know I should know, but I’m...tired. Like I should be sleeping, or half asleep like this, but I can’t sort it out enough to figure out what it is.”he sighed frustrated before wincing a little at the idea of it being dangerous, swallowing thickly. “They’re two different locations?”He said studying the marks. “Probably a good thing to not know where they are...easier to resist not going after them...”Tony sighed a little. “Thanks. Tea would be good.”
 
he blinked a little. "huh..." he pondered that and then. "so it's something you'll have to get used to?" he asked curiously before startling. "you... you know what color my hair is in the summer?" he asked, sounding stunned and then touching the scar on his temple. "how did you... no one notices things like that..." he said, sounding startled still. "have you been stalking me?" he asked, sounding highly, highly amused now, settling down with her. "well. just because it doesn't pick up the finer details, doesn't mean it's a weaker form of vision. with enough practice, i'm sure you'll be able to see things that normal eyes can't." he admitted. she could already. she could 'see' a person's aura, of sorts, thanks to Loki.

he nodded. "it's because the two Supreme Intelligence bases are getting frustrated that you are not obeying them." he admitted. "they are attempting to exert more and more control over you, making you fight all the harder against them. humans are supremely stubborn. you won't give in just because it hurts, or it might kill you." he admitted, smiling at Phil. "it's why humans are so amazing you know. i've always thought, out of all the nine realms, it was humans who had the most promise." he admitted. "out of all the nine realms, i think it's the humans with the chance to be the best." he admitted with a smile before nodding. "yes, but then, i think your twice as stubborn as a normal human. so, even if it was only one location, i thik you would be fine." Loki admitted with a smile. "are you done?" he asked, indicating the wall. "we can go and make you a cup of tea, to help you relax. i can run a few tests on your blood and brain wave patterns while your doing that." he admitted.
 
“yea. I’ll adjust soon.Hopefully.”she sighed a little before wincing flushing brightly at his words. “No not stalking. I’ve just worked with you in summer. And you got the scar in Budapest, I’m the reason it’s sorta crooked. Couldn’t go to a real doctor, so you got some amateur stitches. Really, it was better it was me, and not natasha stitching you up.”She snickered a little before sighing. “I know, it’s just....I don’t like it. I mean...I do...but...”She sighed quietly again, at a loss on how to explain just how lost she felt sometimes.

“Ah.That makes sense.”Phil sighed a little before nodding. “the more it hurts, the less I want to do whatever they want.”Phil smiled a little before laughing. “We have a promise of destruction.”He snorted amused before smirking. “I have to deal with tony stark clint barton, natasha romanoff, and bruce banner on a regular basis. It sorta lends itself to being a stubborn bastard.”He snickered a little before nodding, looking at the carvings. “Yes...for now I’m done.”He said getting up before smiling. “tea sounds good.”
 
he nodded. "sorry. i didn't know you where in budapest." he admitted, wincing. probably because he'd had a severe concussion. which was why he and Natasha remembered Budapest so differently. he didn't remember Budapest at all. well, no, he remembered a big book shaped fountain and Natasha yelling at him to stop throwing rocks at the pigeons. "i like my scar." he admitted with a smile. "makes me look like Harry Potter." he teased with a snicker before nodding. "i understand. loosing your eyesight is not unlike loosing a hand, a leg.... it's tangible, and you mourn the loss just like you would if you lost a pet or a relative." he admitted. "for some people the grief is stronger, a lot of people don't realize just how off balance you are when you loose something so fundamental to your life." he admitted. "your grasping at anything you can, trying to make sense of your world that can't be real for you anymore." he admitted, gently taking her hand. "that's how it was explained to me once. i was born deaf, see. so i never had to experience a whole world."

Loki nodded. "humans are pretty amazing that way. pain is a part of your every day lives. you've come to understand that pain makes you stronger. pain is a fact and running away or giving in won't make the pain stop." Loki admitted. "so you rally against it, make it inconsequential." he smirked. "Aeser are used to some pain. broken bones. cuts, bruises... but if you where to capture one, and torture it, it would give up, give in because Aeser do not understand that it won't make the pain stop." he admitted. "no. destruction is simply what your good at now." he admitted. "do you think the Aeser never fought wars over it's own planet? didn't kill each other just to kill? weren't just as disgusting as humans are now? your still learning, growing, adapting. your still evolving, even animals fight wars you know." he admitted. "even monkeys kill just to kill. this is a fact of life." he admitted. "when you evolve beyond it, you will always remember what you where, and why you shouldn't be that way anymore." he admitted, leading the way to his room which looked completely unrecognizable from when Tony had first loaned it out.

the walls where lined with bookshelves, which where filled with books, scrolls, sheets of paper and parchment and odd metal cylinders. what had once been the second bedroom now appeared to be an indoor garden full of strange unearthly plants. the kitchen was half lab and half kitchen, bookshelves lined half the walls, filled with jars of various strange things and there was a cauldron in the middle of it all, while on the other side it was still a modern day kitchen. "don't worry. i'll put it back the way it was when i move out." Loki promised Phil with a smile, gently picking various leaves from strange plants. "now, unfortunately i am going to have to limit how much you use this tea." he admitted. "no more than three times a day. it can become addictive." he admitted. "it has to be made fresh too, the leaves loose their medicinal qualities when they're dried." he admitted, pouring hot water over them, bringing the fresh scent of pine needles, mint, and some sort of flower into the air. "it needs to steep for five minutes, and then you can drink. you can eat the leaves too but they are quite bitter by themselves and it won't really do anything for you." he admitted. the tea itself was faintly sweet, like honey with chamomile and mint tea. at least it wouldn't be hard to choke down.
 
 

“You had a concussion. I’m amazed you even remember you were in budapest.”Se teased a little.”Yes, you are totally the boy wizard. I mean, even Potter was fascinated with books....think that fountain had a magical pull on you.”She teased. “Yes...like that. It’s...hard.”She swallowed hard, leaning into him, clinging to him as she sniffled. Really starting to allow herself to grieve.

 

“Something like that. Though I think some people deal better then others.”Phil smiled a little before looking thoughtful as he considered just how different the aeser’s did.”Hmm... Sorta like how tony’s evolved from being the weapons dealer, to being iron man. Moving beyond. That’s interesting...”Phil said thinking about it, ebcause he’d never considered humanity that way.

 

Phil looked around him in both amusement and slight worry as he considered the changes. “Good....I doubt tony would want this left in his tower...he’d probably find something bad to do with all the books and cauldron.”Phil said snickering a little.”Really?What’s in it?”Phil said looking thoughtful before nodding. “That’s fine. I can deal with pain.”he sashrugging a little as he took the tea after it was done, sippign it. “You know, it tastes better then I thought it would.”
 
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