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A Niche in Time

Well it's Saturday, and you know what that means. It means that for this week I actually don't have to go to work today. I have a Saturday off. Yes! While at work the other day, I heard a customer say something about haint blue. I thought he was saying something wrong on purpose, that maybe he was making fun of a sport team by saying the name of their color wrong, something other than what he was truly talking about. I have lived in my hometown my whole life, and I had never heard of this. Apparently in Charleston SC most of the underside of the roofs on the covered porches are painted blue, haint blue to be exact. Haint refers to an angry, lost spirit that is roaming this world. A haint can not cross water. So they paint the underside of the roofs this color to make them think it's water, and since they can't cross water, it will keep them out of their house. *clears throat* I kid you not. I looked at my co-workers and said, "You're pulling my leg." Now if that statement is only a southern thing, I apologize. It means basically you're kidding me. I have never heard of this. Well after looking online it turns out this is very true. It's a tradition that started with the Gulla Geechee. They were a group of people, African slaves, that came to America. I've read they were stolen from their homes and brought to America into the low country of South Carolina and Georgia. There is myth that the blue paint repels bugs, but in truth, when the practice of painting porches this color began, they used paint that contained lye. Lye actually is the ingredient that repelled the bugs. It wasn't the color. Still that is a myth that most people believe today. They say that the color confuses the bugs, makes them think they are looking at the sky, and they won't build nests there. I've heard that bugs see colors differently than we do. So if that is the case, then they make not be confused and just see a different color than we do. He also talked about how people put colanders on their front porches as well. There is some kind of hag that will wander down the streets, and if she sees the colander, she will become distracted by counting the holes in it and will not come inside your home. *clears throat* Okay. Again, I have never heard of this. They talked about how some people decorate graves with broken glass on special days. I was just in awe by these stories. So there you have it. A little lesson about the south.


Coronavirus. *screams* There are times I am so sick of hearing about this. The panic buying is going nuts around here. There is no toilet paper. What is up with that? People are buying it up like they are never going to be able to buy toilet paper again. Do they think we will be quarantined for five months? Come on people. I just want enough toilet paper to last me one month. One month. 30 days. That's it. I grabbed a roll of shop towels at work last night. Shop towels come on a roll like paper towels, are blue, and are softer than paper towels. I said, "Cut it in half, two rolls for a dollar ninety seven." My co-worker said, "you can't flush that." I told her, "Desperate times." Now I didn't buy the shop towels. It was a joke aimed at the measures some people might have to take because someone else have five big packs of toilet paper in their house. One of my co-workers said he didn't want to buy it up and then we not get quarantined. I said, "why? You gonna stop shitting?" Now granted it is something you will always need. So why not buy it all up? The problem is going crazy with how much you buy. Save some for the rest of us. You do not need enough toilet paper in your house to last you until Christmas. It's like they think will not ever be able to buy it again. People are crazy. Crazy I tell you. They are even selling it on ebay. Trust me. I looked. This virus is showing the best and worst in people. If I find it, I would like to buy extra just to give to the people I know who can't find it. Next Saturday I will travel to Columbia SC. My brother and his wife live there. We are going to celebrate birthdays, his and my dad. We are also going to Sam's Club Warehouse. There I want to buy some things in bulk in case we are put into quarantine. Do I think it will happen? I don't know, but I want to be prepared in case it does happen. I'd rather have supplies and not need them, than to need them and not have them. Besides, the things I plan on buying will be used either way. All this panic buying here, and do you know how many cases they have found in my county? 10? 20? 40? 80? 100? 1000? Nope. 2. That's right. 2, I've heard the 1 was sent to another hospital, and then she was sent home. Now neither of the 2 hospitals she went to are in my town. The other case is someone who was in contact with her. That's it folks. Do I think it's going to get worse? Yes. I think we will have more cases in my town. Certainly. There was a rumor yesterday that someone at our local bank tested positive for it. I don't know if it's been on the news yet or not. I don't watch the news much. I never watch tv when I'm at home. Just Netflix and Disney Plus.

Which brings me to my next topic. What I'm about to do. lol. I'm about to go back to watching a tv series based from a Steven King book. Under The Dome. Everybody stay safe. Have a good day BMR.
 
That story about 'haint blue' is so cool. I love folklore and you're in an area that's really spoiled for it. It does explain why all those elegant Southern buildings are the particular shade!
 
DeRe, I'm glad you enjoyed that. I personally was so amused to hear it. I had no idea, and I've grown up in the SC. I'll keep you in mind if I hear anything else along those lines.

Today is Tuesday. Another day another dollar. Work calls in a few hours. I don't want to go, but I need to make money. I'm so ready for this weekend. Friday morning I'm going to try and buy some meats for my freezer. Typically on payday getting enough food to last for two weeks is the goal. This time I'm worried about getting enough food to last through a lockdown. Italy and France are already on lockdown. China went through a lockdown. Parts of the Netherlands are on lockdown as well. I can't help but think it's coming, even though our President said yesterday he's not looking to do that. He also said in hot spots it may be coming, but for right now, he's not looking to do that for the entire nation. My state doesn't have as many cases as say NY or California. We stand at 27 cases and 1 death. So I don't think we would be considered a hot spot. Our schools are closed right now.

Please take care of each other and yourselves. Stay safe. Have a good day BMR.
 
I walked home in the rain just now. It wasn't far, and to be honest, it was beautiful. I love the rain. It cools everything off. The temperature outside is amazing right now. I wish it would rain more often. Trust me, I think that makes me an odd ball around here. This town is all about the summer, flip flop, shorts, beach weather. They like to get out and do things in their yards. Now if I lived in Myrtle Beach, I would be all about the hot weather as well. Knowing that on a day off I could travel to the ocean or a pool would make it all better. I'd want to live in an apartment building. So on days off lounging by the pool would be great. Then at night dinner and a walk on the boardwalk before going down onto the sand and listening to the ocean waves, would be perfect. No. It'll never happen. It's not in the cards for me to live in such a place. The only other place I would love to live in is the mountains. Find a small town, smaller than the one I'm in now, and just wait for winter. Wait for the snow that I rarely see fall and blanket the ground. Snow makes everything look clean. I know it's just an illusion of white covering the nasty, dirty surroundings beneath it, but it's an illusion I can live with. It's one I like to see. Sadly the temperatures here in the south don't allow for it that much. So here in the south I shall stay.

I glanced up at my previous post where I mention we only have 27 cases here in my state. That seems like a lifetime ago. Certainly it has to be weeks old considering we are now going to go over 300 soon, if not today. It's unreal. At my job, it's unreal how much people are coming out. I can't believe it. Our sales are going through the roof. Suddenly painting the house is something people have the time to do since they are at home all the time. Our governor hasn't issued a quarantine or lock down order yet. Still I guess some jobs have some people at home. I know the schools are still closed. So these people keep coming in buying non-essential items to have something to do while they're at home or because they now have the time to do these things. Whatever their reasons, I'm not sure of, but it's not a good enough reason. Not many reasons are worth coming out into a crowd to get paint or ask about deck stain. I just want to scream at people, "go home!" It wouldn't do any good though. Oh it would put on a show for them and end with my being fired, but in the end, they would still come. It will take an order from our governor to keep them at home. I see the amount of cases New York has, and it scares me to think of that many being here. We have 5 in the county I live in. 5. I know that's not a lot, but it's enough. It's too many. 1 is too many. Nobody should have to die because of this disease, and yet it keeps claiming lives. Why? Because they're too old, they're too ill to fight it off, because it's a virus that doesn't care about you in the slightest. That's it really. It doesn't care about age, skin color, if you're a mom, dad, husband, wife, brother, sister, someone's entire world. No. It doesn't care at all. It doesn't think. It's not suppose to. That's our job, and some of us are failing at it miserably. Think about the next time you have to make a run for something you think you need. Do you really need it? Do you just want it? I go to Home Depot 5 days out of the week for 9 hours a day. I do this because they pay me to. I never said they pay me well. That's another discussion for another day. The point is, if they didn't pay me, I wouldn't be there. I'm perfectly happy to be at home, only going when I need to. Now tomorrow I would like to make a shopping trip in a nearby county at a wholesale warehouse. Do I need to go? Not really, but I want to go so that I can try and stock on some items so that in the event they put us on lockdown, I already have some items here with me. My mom has said she needs toilet paper, but she has no idea where she's gonna get it. I'm hoping they might have some. If not, I actually do have a spare 4 pack here with me I can give to her, and I will, without hesitation. This woman has taken care of me. She gave me life. So yes I would give her toilet paper. Besides, I've given her enough shit in my lifetime. This virus isn't a joke. It's not a vacation from your job. It's a virus. It's deadly, and it's blind. It won't see for who you are. You are nothing more than a host. That's it, and once you die....does it really matter what happens after that? What matters is making sure that doesn't happen. So please, take care of yourself. If you go out in public, don't think of it as everyone else has to virus, and you're trying to protect yourself from catching it. Think of it as you already have it, and you're trying not to infect them. Respect personal space. Don't touch your face. Wash your hands as often as you can. Think. Be safe.
 
I haven't written a journal entry in a while. So here goes. I haven't written anything really in a while. It seems to be a nasty cycle that I'm on. I get up, leave the house, don't come back until after 10, watch some tv, and I end up passing out. I blame being tired and Netflix. Currently I am on season 7 of Once Upon A Time. Someone at work has mentioned to me watching The Tiger King. *sighs* I probably will just to see what it's all about.

Work is another story. Today is the first day we will start limiting the amount of customers in the building. They were setting some of it up last night. 150. To me, that's too many, but we shall see. I know sometimes there will be 2, 4, or more people come in with one family. So taking that into account, it won't be as many families maybe. I don't know. We'll see. I may find out that the number 150 isn't that many people in the store after all. Yesterday was the first day that all non-essential business were closed. The place I work at is deemed an essential business. So we are still opened. Granted our hours are modified. Instead of closing at 10 we are closing at 6. I still have to stay until 10 to stock and clean, but we close to the public at 6. In South Carolina we have 1,293 cases of COVID-19. In my county, we have 17. Now from what I've heard, and take that with a grain of salt because it's all hearsay, only 2 of them, I think, ended up in the hospital. South Carolina has had 26 deaths. None of them have been from my county. Charleston has the most cases with 190. People are coming in still as if nothing has changed. The store I work at has seen sales go through the roof. It bogles my mind. They are coming in to buy things that are not essential. Paint for one thing. My little department was first in the district last week. We were first amid 9 departments. We were second in my own store, only coming in behind garden. We sold more merchandise in my tiny department than lumber or hardware. That's an accomplishment, yes, but it also speaks volumes about the purchases people are making. Yesterday they were coming in to the store just to walk around and look because they were bored at home. People. This is not a vacation. It's a time to stay at home and stay safe. I don't get people. I am only there because they pay me to be. If it were not for that, trust me, I would not be there. People are putting their lives at risk for silly things. It's business as usual at my store, but that's the thing. It's not business as usual.

Well those are my thoughts for the day. I know things are going to get much worse. Before all this started to get worse, I asked for some time off. That time off starts tomorrow. So I guess it's a good thing I asked for it. I'll have 5 days away from my job. Now with my vacation time and extra sick time they gave me, I can take a few weeks off easily with pay. I don't want to do that though. If things get too bad here though, I may do just that. In total, I'll have about 2 weeks vacation time and 2 weeks sick time. So I could take a month off and just stay home. It's a nice thought, but one never knows when they will need that time. So for now, I'm going to keep working. Which brings me to this point. I have to go get ready to leave the house for the day. So have a good day BMR.
 
I was browsing through my last post before writing this. I found a loop hole of sorts with my job. I stated that I was only there because they paid me to be. Well, currently I am on vacation. So technically they are still paying me to not be there. lol. After my vacation time is over, which is today, I will be using some of my personal time to take another week off. I won't go back until Tuesday of next week. Sadly then I will have to work five days in row before getting two days off. I can't complain though. I've had a long vacation by that point.

Secondly I noticed how things have changed. The numbers were so different in my last post. South Carolina now has 2,232 cases. Sadly we have had 48 deaths. Richland county now has the most cases out of any county in my state. They have 311. Those numbers are a vast starkness to where we were not even a week ago.

My mom has taken to sewing face masks. So I will have some kind of protection at my job. It's cloth with a layer of filter sewn in. The only thing it's missing is a metal strip for the nose. These tie with ribbons. I went with her when she had to go into town. I know. I complained about all the people in my store in my last post, and here I am going shopping. I bought some fabric. The next day I took another trip with her to buy more fabrics. Some of the people I know want her to make masks for them. Her masks are beautiful. The one I'm going to be wearing today has Winnie The Pooh on it with yellow ribbons. lol. I know. lol. It's a child's character, but the mask is so cute. Why am I going out? Well today actually is a food run. I'm going shopping for meats. We have a place that sells some really good quality meat at awesome prices. They limit how many people can come inside the store there. So she and I are going shopping. In fact, I should bring this post to a close and be heading her way.

So with that, I bid you farewell BMR. Have a good day BMR.
 
I did it. Today I extended my vacation out until next Tuesday. It's going to be difficult going back, in the sense that I've been off for so long. Still I think I will enjoy this extra time off.

Today I am grocery shopping, but it's not for me. I'm going with someone from my family. I know. Stay at home. When that's not an option, or at least a good option, take percautions. I will. As I stated above, my mom has taken to sewing masks. So I will be wearing one.

Question. Do any of you have a problem giving out someone's phone number if someone else asks for it? I had a co-worker ask me for our department head's phone number. Now I told her I had asked her if I could give it to her, and I explained that I don't like giving out people's phone numbers without permission. To me, it's a trust thing. This lady trusted me enough to give me her phone number. Now my co-worker said she had the number before but lost it when she changed phones. Okay. I still want the lady's permission. Would you just give out the number, or would you take the path I did? Just a curious thing.

I did finish Once Upon A Time on Netflix. Actually enjoyed the show, and they gave it a beautiful ending. Well, there was just one thing I wish could have changed. I think The Good Queen deserved to finally have love. Just my thoughts. Now I've been told about The Tiger King, but another show does have a whole new season out there. *sigh* There are times I wish I didn't know about Netflix at all. Still with me working nights, watching a tv show that comes every week on the same night at the same time is impossible. So I make due. I know some people who have a tv in their bedroom. Not me. I use to, but not anymore. Nope. Just my laptop.

Today I feel....blah? Blue? Just....here? I guess? I don't know. Do you ever have those days where you feel....well....like I described? I feel like I want to reflect on things. Things I've lost. Things I have. Things I want to take ahold of and move forward with. It's like being in a place in my life where I just want to stop and look around. So often things move so fast. It's always good to just stop and take in the view. That's where I'm at today I guess. So much has happened. So much love. So much anger. So many good times. So many bad times. If anyone had told us we, as a nation, would be where we are now a year ago, it would have seemed impossible, like a plot for a movie, and yet, here we are. Masks and gloves are part of our everyday lives. Going grocery shopping is now....so different. Everything is so different. Vacations are something I'm wondering if we will today today's children about when they grow older. Will they get to experience actually going to a rock concert and screaming their lungs out? Spring break? Prom? An actual graduation ceremony? Will they get to experience these things? I hope so. I hope. That's one of the main things we all need to do. Now I'm not shoving religion down anyone's throat, but I was raised free will Baptist. So I do believe in prayer. I think we all need to pray and have hope. Now please don't bash me for that. I don't bash others for their religious beliefs? Well, there was this one guy I dated who was a Wiccan, and I told him he was going to hell, but, I did take the time to learn about his religion. In all, Wicca is a beautiful religion. Most people have such misconceptions about Wicca and being Pagan, but that my friends is a post for another day.

For now, I'm going to enjoy some lunch, do some browsing online, take a shower, wash my hair, and then head out. Maybe not at all in that order. lol. Have a good day BMR.
 
4,246. 73. 2. Those aren't just random numbers. The first number is the amount of cases we have here in Lancaster. On April 7 my post was about the number of cases we have. The contrast is stark. 2,953 more. It's only been 2 week. The second number is the amount of cases we have in my county, and sadly the number 2 is the number of deaths we have had in my county. Now I know compared to other numbers, those are not bad. We have been very blessed here, and I thank God for that. I just pray that other states soon find the health they need.

Today is the first day I've been off since returning back from my extended vacation. I worked five days straight. Now I know to some that may not be anything big, but where I work, it is. Once you hit the five day mark, people starting getting burned out. That is under normal circumstances. Add to that what it's been like lately, and you get really burned out. Business has been crazy lately. In my town, there are only two options right now for people who want to go out and shop. They either go to Wal-Mart, or they come to where I work. Both places are closing early too. We close at 6. Wal-Mart closes at 8:30. It's crazy. There were 15 people waiting to get inside the store I work at yesterday morning at 6 a.m.. Someone said a man nearly tripped over himself trying to get in. When I went to work yesterday at 11, there was a line. We are limiting the amount of people that can be inside the store. I'm glad for that. Otherwise we might be constantly bombarded with people. It amazes me how people seem to think paint is so essential. It's sad. I hear the comment, "well what do they expect us to do," and "people need to have something to do," on social media and once in person at work from a customer. What does the government and these companies expect you to do? Really? They expect you to live. That's what they expect you to do. If you can't find ways to entertain yourself and your family at home, then you have more serious problems than you think. If you have to come out to Home Depot and buy up things to have projects to keep your mind busy and keep your kids busy, then you certainly do have problems. You're putting your life at risk. You're putting the lives of the people in your family at risk. You're putting my life at risk. All of these people are more important than having a project to do. April 1 was when all non-essential businesses closed. It's only April 19. You mean to tell me you had to have projects for that small amount of time? Granted when the order was issued nobody knew when it would end, but the fact still remains that these people are showing zero common sense. They are bringing in the kids. I don't mean little 10 year olds running around. No I mean kids that are still in car seats. Pregnant women. Elderly. All of these customers are still coming in amid this virus. Now yes I am seeing more masks, but still people. Stay. At. Home. Now to be fair, yes I do still go out to different places. I have had to go grocery shopping. I think most people can understand that one, but today I am planning on going out of town to a fabric store. As I posted before, my mom has taken to sewing face masks. So today I'm going to buy more fabric for some of those. So I am just as bad as the people I am complaining about. I will own that fact.

For what it's worth, I do wear a face mask when I go out or to work. I urge people to do that. It's all about being safe and smart. Our governor is about to reopen all the shops on Monday. Personally I think it's a terrible mistake. Our projected peak time is next Saturday. So we haven't even seen our peak yet. Granted it's all projected, and our numbers may be going down. Perhaps that's why he's doing it. I do not know. Until I feel safe, I will continue to wear a face mask. Since I am off today and tomorrow, I hope to have some replies out to some lovely, wonderful partners. You guys, and girl, are the best. Have a good day BMR.
 
I am feeling seriously down today.

4,608 cases in my state. 79 in my county. The numbers just keep going up, and yes, some of the stores are now re-opened. The governor left it to the authorities at the beach to decide on opening those back up, and thankfully they have more brains. They have decided to not open from what I've heard. It's a smart move.

Have a good day BMR.
 
South Carolina now has 8,030 cases. 111 of those are in my county. Compared to some numbers that we've seen in other places, those aren't that bad. More and more places are opening back up on the 18th. Some have already done so. My family went out for dinner yesterday, and it wasn't outdoor dining. It was strange being inside a restaurant again. We were early. There were tables sectioned off where people couldn't sit to ensure social distancing. In fact, in the part of the restaurant we were in, there wasn't anyone else. Like I said, we went early to avoid crowds. The service was great, of course. Our server was happy to be back at work. The place had been doing curbside service. So I can only assume she meant she was happy to be back to work on the inside.

Nothing seems normal. I don't know that it ever will be. That bothers me to no end. I mentioned in an earlier post will the children growing up today know the same things that all of us enjoyed. Will there ever be concerts again? I see how things have changed for the graduating seniors. What will it be like for the ones that aren't even in school yet? Will there ever be another ceremony where people are packed into a place to watch with pride as their loved one receives their diploma?

I have to go to work today, though I don't feel much like going. I wasn't feeling well last night. No, it didn't have anything to do with going out in public yesterday. It had more to do with something I had eaten. Still I'm going. I have the sick time to cover it, but no. I'm going to work.

I haven't been writing lately. Even this journal entry comes late. Things in real life....well they just have been a little....hard lately. In entries before I've talked about my guy, my Papa, and no that nickname doesn't have anything to do with rping or a daddy issue. It's just a nickname. The sad truth is I walked away from the relationship. I have my reasons. It didn't feel like he was as into things as he once was. We were not seeing each other as much. I told him months ago, when he took this job he was working, that it would be the end of us, that it would cause problems, and it did. It tore us apart, and try as I did to hold it together, I just wasn't able to. We started seeing each other less and less. Even our texts became fewer and fewer. It was the job. It was his life. Everything became so much harder for him because of the job. It took a toll on him. He quit the job, but the damage had been done. Even with him not working, things didn't feel normal again. Things didn't go back to the way they were. He had more time on his hands, but I wasn't someone he wanted to see. So our conversations led to awkward feelings on my part. We would fight. I told him I was done. I poured my heart as to why I had made a decision I recently made, and he basically called me a liar. His words were, "as if I could believe all that". Almost 20 minutes later, when I hadn't responded, he messaged me, "lol. Keep pouting." So I told him same thing to him. He says that he's not pouting, and that's he's fine. I say ok then. He gives me a lol with an eye roll emogi. Almost 20 minutes later I tell him that for what it's worth, I really did care about him. Blah blah blah. He reads the message almost 2 hours later, and that's it. Nothing since then. I have been so tempted to message him. Why? Because I'm an idiot. Because I hurt. It's worse at night, when I'm in my room alone. I'm tired of hurting. I want it to be gone, over, done with. This is the down side to dating someone. You get hurt. This is why I should never let anyone in. You let people in, you get hurt. Walls should be up. Nothing in. Nothing out. That's the way it should be. I have to fight not to message him. I have typed in message just to delete them. Why not send them? Because what if he doesn't respond? What if he does, and his response is bad? No. I can't take that risk. I could pour my heart again just to be called a liar again or worse ignored. No thank you. Not today.

I've vented enough. It's time to get going for the day. Have a good day BMR.
 
I am sick. No, it's not Covid-19. It's just a head cold. My senses of taste and smell are fine. My appetite is fine. I've spent the day in bed sleeping on and off again. There is no fever. Sure I cough. My nose is stuffy, and I've had a headache on and off again for a few days now, but I'm fine. I even went to work yesterday. So it's not Covid-19. It's just a head cold. I had one back in November last year. Kicked my behind. I got better. Two people in my family have the same exact thing. I'm sure that's where I got it from. They are younger than me and doing just fine. If anything, this gave me a day off to do nothing but lie around. I literally have gotten up to go to the bathroom, start a load of laundry, and that's it. lol. I didn't even leave my bed to eat. Be grossed out by that if you want. I don't care. It's comfortable here in my room. I yawning. Of course I'm also taking nighttime cold meds. lol. I'm getting some good sleep.

I hope everyone else is doing fine. There was a time I checked the numbers for Covid-19 everyday. Now? Not so much. Maybe our country is becoming numb to it. We're growing so restless and wanting our lives to get back to normal. I get that. I really do. Normal may not be attainable for a long time still. So we're adapting. Humans are so good at that. Things are changing. I hate change personally. I struggle with it. My lack of being able to deal with change has caused problems in my personal life in the past. Simple things some girls could deal with made for a rough time for me. In turn, that made for a rough time for the guy I was with. lol. I joke around that I'm cursed. I'm not lucky in love. I'll admit some of that is on me. I can do that. I can be the bigger person and admit that, but it takes two. Geez. Now I'm rambling. See what being sick is doing to me? lol. Tomorrow I am taking a hot shower, washing my hair, and I am getting dressed. I am going to go out and do something. That will make me feel better.

So here's wishing everyone here at BMR a good night.
 
I haven't done this in a while. So I thought, 'why not'? Today is a work day. I'm thinking about taking a personal day tomorrow. There are some things I want to do, and none of them involve mixing paint for people. Besides tomorrow is paint day, and I hate paint day. Why? That's the day we get pallets of paint in, and we have to put it up. If it will fit on the shelves or it's respective place, we put it there. If it won't, well that's a whole other beast. It goes in the overhead. Not much of a big deal if we have someone that can operate the electric ladder. You see, the electric ladder has a flat platform that we can stack the cases of paint on. The operated stands on it as well, and they use the controls to go up and down. So in one trip up, the operate can take several cases with them and stack them in the overhead. If we don't have someone that can operate it, then that means getting one of the big orange sets of steps that you see inside the store. You set four cans of paint on there and move them up as you go up until you reach a step you can stand on and put them in the overhead. You also have to have an empty box to stack them in. Now you can do two cases, or eight cans of paint, if you want. It takes a lot of time, and it's hard on the arms. That's part of why I hate paint day. We get in paint of all sizes that day. From the tiny eight ounce jars to the big five gallons. We even get in tint that day. Tint goes in the overhead as well. Tint is a monster by itself. It ruins clothes if you get it on what you're wearing. I've done that before. My shoes have tint stains on them. My favorite jacket was ruined by tint. I had the lid on a blue container come off when I went to shake it, and it spilled down my apron. It soaked through my shirt and bra. So I had to go to the bathroom and take all of that off and clean my skin. So I took my jacket and wore it on when I left. That's not the time my jacket got ruined though. No. I don't know when that happened. You see one of my co-workers got tint on it, and they didn't bother to tell me. So I have no idea which one of them did that. All work hazards. We've all got them.

Sadly we have a new work hazard to worry about these days. Covid, or Rona as we've grown to call it around my family and friends. It's sad. They provide us with masks, gloves, and hand sanitizer. The masks aren't the best quality. My mom makes cloth ones that are better than the ones we are given. We have 220 cases in the county I live in. South Carolina as a whole has 15,759. Our governor has said he will not shut the state down again. He says that and wearing face masks shouldn't be a mandate. It should be induvial responsibility. That's all I'm going to say on that one.

As for writing, in the next month something may be changing that might give me more time to write. I won't say what, but things are changing up for me. I might have more free time. It's a good thing and a bad thing. Complicated right. lol. All the best things usually are. As for me and my guy, well....he says he loves me, wants me, and then I don't hear from him for days. Then he appears again, texting me, and he's gone again. *Laughs* Whatever. I'm not going to be the one texting him, waiting for him to text me. Nope. He doesn't even have a job right now, and yet he can't make time to come see me or even text. No, he's too busy doing other things. So fine. Enjoy those things you're doing. Me? I got a life, and if you won't want to a part of it, then so be it. I don't have time for games. I don't have anymore time in fact. I should be getting changed from my night clothes and heading out. So have a good day BMR.
 
When I was a kid, mom would wash the sheets on my bed weekly. She did that for all of us, as there were three of us for the first ten years of my life. When she would make the beds after doing so, she would put baby powders on the bed and between the sheets. So at night, when you climbed in, you would get baby powders on you. The smell was amazing. As an adult, I can appreciate climbing into a bed with clean sheets. Last night I put clean sheets on my bed. Now I didn't put the baby powders in my bed, but that is still a good feeling to climb in between clean sheets. It's crazy to think about that. Something from when I was growing comes back to me when I started to think about doing this post. So I opened with it.

In the store I work at, we have two confirmed cases of Covid-19. As much as I wish they could give me the safety and protection I felt as a kid, they can't. No, this is something I have to handle as an adult. Alone. We are waiting on more people to hear back from their results as well. Four more, I think is how many I was told. I think. Now the store isn't shutting down to clean and sanitize. No, we're still open for business. They haven't released a statement to the public or the news, that I know of. It's on the internet though, as I'm sure you know how great the internet can be for spreading the word. They told us to keep cleaning everything. I want to say to them, "that's done a good job of keeping everyone safe so far." It's real, and it's finally hitting close to home. It's more real than it's ever been. Now I continue to wear my face mask. It's a cloth one, but I wear it. They did say they were going to get masks for each person that we could take home and wash. For now, they have been offering surgical, disposable masks. I don't wear those because I support my mom. She makes the ones I wear. I know some people won't be able to wear a mask. They say they can't breathe in them. Of course you can't. lol. Trust me. I've been wearing one for a while now, and it stinks to wear it.

Have a good day BMR.
 
Tonight, after I got off from work, I went to visit my parents. My mom made something I haven't had in a while. She made her hot chocolate. Now it's hot here. I made a comment about her making hot chocolate, and she says, "you drink cold stuff in the winter." lol. Well. Can't argue with that. That's my mom. lol.

It's late here. 2:57 a.m.. So I guess it's more like it's early here. I should be in bed. To a degree, I am, but I guess I should be sleeping. Today is my day off. This weekend I'm looking forward to taking some personal time and being off for four whole days. My mom actually wants to paint the fence around her front yard. It's not big by any means, but stop and think about it. She wants me to help paint a fence on my days off from mixing paint. Yeah. I told her I didn't want to be out in the heat painting a fence. lol.

I wish I had more interesting things to talk about, but the truth is, I don't. So I guess on that note, I'll turn the lights off, Netflix on, and lie in bed. Have a good day today BMR.
 
I hate people.

I say that phrase so much. Is it true? I really don't know. I do know that when I'm at work, yeah, I do hate people. Well, certain kinds of people. The stupid, lazy people that don't bother to put any effort into what they're looking for. The idiots that come in and think that by giving me some half explained description of what they're looking for I'll be able to find it. Those are the kinds of people I hate. "Well it comes in a red box, and it has this thing on it that comes down like this. It's shaped like a pear. My sister said she bought it here." Yeah. You really opened the box on that one. Sure. I can find that. Are you kidding me? The ones that come up to me and just ask where something is. Never mind the fact you didn't even bother to look. Never mind the fact there are signs up everywhere. You just don't want to take the time to actually look, and you're the one doing home improvements? "Can you give me some help with spraypaint?" What is there to help you with it? It's spraypaint. You point it and spray. I literally said that to my boss as I was walking someone to, you guessed it, the spraypaint. Why? Because they're idiots. They don't want to take the time to read the can. Let me tell you something people. The spraypaint at home depot is all oil based. It will stick to pretty much anything. If it has a big 2X on the can, it even has primer. There you go. How much will you need to paint your two chairs? I have no fricking clue. Are you planning on holding the can close and spraying it on thick inside? Will you be outside, like you should be in the first place? Are you going to be spraying nice, even, light coats, like you should? Will it be windy when you're outside doing this? All of these things factor in as to how much you will need. I am not able to see into the future. Use your brains. I hope you have them, but I'm seriously starting to wonder about people. I was asked for paint with stain in it. Let me tell you something. It does not exist. You either get paint or stain, but not both. Someone called me up one night and asked if we had spraypaint in a can. I kid you not. It was not a phone prank. They didn't say, "well you better let it out." It was a legit question. I had a customer ask me where the mailboxes were. Not a strange question normally, but this man had one in a box under his arm. These are the kinds of people I can't stand.

My cynical nature is making me not like people in general. I'd rather be left alone. I'm not a touchy, feely person in person. Nope. I use to be, but not anymore. Life has a way of slapping that out of you. My boss was standing beside me the other day. She says, "have you ever hurt in a weird place?" I literally took one step away from her. She laughed. Then she asks, "will you freak out if I touch you?" Again, I took another step away from her, but this time I bumped into the tint machine. Now I'm stuck. So she reaches down and touches me on the back of my knee. It was all in fun honestly. I still laugh about it, but it shows that even my boss knows I'm not the touchy, feely kind. I use to be. I had this one boyfriend that I would come up to while he would be cooking in the kitchen and wrap my arms around him while snuggling into his back. He always told me I had the worst timing. *sighs* Like I said, life has a way of slapping that out of you.

As for guys, my guy showed up at my job surprising me the other day. It was great. I've missed him dearly. He hopefully will have a new job soon. I'm not impressed. Honestly I've had the same job for five years now. This will be his third. Things like this is why I won't get too serious with him. He can't provide a stable....life. Trust me, there are other reasons, but this is one I will mention here. Oh, I do love him. He's great and all, but....nah. Real love? Happy ever after? It ain't for me. It's not in the cards.

Tonight at 10pm our town had a small fireworks display. People parked along the street and in this one parking lot. It was short, but it was beautiful. After it was over, people honked their horns in appreciation. It was safe, and I think it was something we needed. For 15 minutes nobody thought about coronavirus or their jobs. They focused on something beautiful. I think we all need a little more of that these days. So take the time to find something beautiful in your day and focus on it for a little while. It's late here, and I really should be sleeping. Have a good day BMR.
 
Good afternoon BMR.

Today is going to be another hot one here. Unless I'm at the beach, I hate summer. Myrtle Beach is a kind of close beach that I use to visit. When I was growing up, my whole family would go on family vacations there. Times have changed there now. Now it's not so family friendly from what I hear. Shootings. Gangs. It's not as nice as it use to be. I went a few years back, and at that time, it was as I remembered it. Perhaps in a few years I'll go back again regardless of what I hear. After all, no place on earth is perfect, free of crime and what comes with it. Even if there were such a place, people would move there and the usual would set in. So it wouldn't be perfect for long. For the longest time I wanted to live at the beach. I hated to come home. When I would come home, I would start looking at places to rent so I could move there. lol. Eventually it would die down, the desire to move there, and life would return to normal. These days I find myself a small town in the mountains to live in. Why? Because I'm hoping it doesn't get that hot there in the summer, and in the winter it snows. Yes snow. Here we don't see much snow if any. I find snow beautiful.

In other news, my free time situation is up in the air right now. In a month or so I may have more free time in the mornings. I'm hoping. Right now I spend my mornings with my mom. She quit here job working in a restaurant when the Coronavirus got so bad that dine in was shut down. Even with restrictions being lifted, she decided not to go back. That has had some good effects and some bad. The good is that I can sleep in late. The bad is that she's always home. lol. Don't get me wrong. I love my mom. I love her with all my heart. She's my best friend, but time apart is also a good thing.

FRree time is something I don't get. Even on my days off from my job, my family wants me with them. So literally I don't have days where I can just spend the day doing what I want. It affects the fact that my muse is squashed. By the time I get home, all I want to do is lie around and watch Netflix. When I first came here to BMR, I would have entire days where I could write. On my days off, I could spend entire days just rapid fire replying. I had 20+ rps going, and I could keep up with what was happening in each of them. Rare was the time I was totally caught up, but I still managed. I had fun. I was a rping machine. lol. Now? Not so much. I can have a couple, and even then it takes a while to reply. I'm thankful for the people that I have around that understand how busy I am. Literally there was this one day off that I had where I left my house around 10. I think it was 10:45 that night when I got back home, and that was a day off. So no. I didn't get much time at home. I work from 1 to 10pm. So my days are gone pretty quick considering what time I have to be at work. People usually have no idea of how it feels to feel like you don't have a life. Well I don't feel like I have a life. My life is all get up and go. Run. Run. Run. Go. Go. Go. Go. I can't slow down. I don't slow down. Even when I'm sick or hurting. My back was hurting yesterday, and I was at work, going on like nothing was wrong. I have to work to support my nasty little habits, like internet. lol. I am tired people. Most people don't understand the kind of tired I'm talking about. I'm talking tired enough to fall asleep with sock on, and a bra ladies, you know how that feels, with the computer playing, and the lights on tired. The kind of tired where you wake up, and instantly you're already tired. That's me. I remember once being so tired that I had a dream about just laying down in the floor, that I couldn't go on anymore. That feeling began to translate into rl. I wanted to just lay down. Now I'm not telling you this so you'll feel sorry for me. No. Pity is the last thing I want. I want understanding, and I feel like I have a few people that do that. I have a few people that if I get quiet for a while, they understand. They don't take offense to it. They don't think it's all about them. It can't be. lol. I don't have time to make it all about them. Even when I've gone for months without talking to her, LadyDark has always been understanding. It's like no time has passed, and she's right there. That's a real friend. Thank you LadyDark for that. I'm writing all this, and I can't help but wonder if I'll hit the delete key and not post it. Even now I'm just watching that blinking line there waiting for letters to form words. It only stops when I type. It's mocking me really. It's always one step ahead of me. lol.

Well, as you may have guessed, it's time for me to get started with my day. Run. Run. Go. Go. I work today until 10. Guess what? I do it again tomorrow. Have a good day BMR.
 
Good afternoon BMR. I would normally be at work right now, but I took a few days off for vacation. Two of them I spent doing as I would normally do on my days off. Yesterday and today, on the other hand, have been quite different. Yesterday I was in bed all day ill. Today I'm feeling much better, but today is still a lazy day.

So since today is a lazy day, perhaps I will get a few replies out. I would like to. I know soon on my agenda is a nice shower with hair washing included. lol.

I just heard about this new movement today. It's called The Go Free Movement? She wasn't sure what part of the world it is in, but basically it's where women go without any type of sanitary items during that time of the month. *pause to think about how nasty that is* I just can't imagine doing that. I'm sorry. It's messy, and as she said, it stinks. So no, I will not be joining that movement. lol.

Okay. So having said that, I think I'm gonna go for now. Have a good day BMR.
 
While I am trying to get up and moving, I am clearly not 100%. Whatever this bug was, it has certainly knocked me for a loop. My hope is that anyone that catches this thing, gets over it faster than I did. Typically a bug like this would have only had me down one day, maybe two. This is day three, and I'm still down. I took a personal day from work today because I'm still feeling that poorly. It isn't fair. I want to get up and keep moving. My mind wants my routine back, but my body is saying, "no".

I meant to post this in yesterday's post, but I forgot. One of my favorite movies was on tv. It's an older movie. I like Whatever Happened To Baby Jane, yes, but this other movie I like as well. To Sir, With Love.

Well, I'm trying to get my normal day to day back. So I'm going to take my leave from BMR now. Have a good day BMR.
 
I keep looking at the group rps wanting an idea to come across that I can sink my teeth into. I liked working with a group. It's where I got my start in rping. Guess you can take the girl out of the group, but you can't take the group out of the girl. Wait. That sounds a little....painful? Maybe? lol.
 
AndNich123 said:
I keep looking at the group rps wanting an idea to come across that I can sink my teeth into. I liked working with a group. It's where I got my start in rping. Guess you can take the girl out of the group, but you can't take the group out of the girl. Wait. That sounds a little....painful? Maybe? lol.
Click to expand...

What sort of Ideas are you looking for, just in general.
 
Well today is Sunday. I'll be heading to work here in a little bit. Sundays aren't too bad in the sense that I get off at 8 some of the time. Today is one of those times. So even though it's the same amount of hours as any other day, it feels shorter because I'm getting off while the sun is still shining. lol. Most of the time it's dark when I get off. So I feel like most of my day is gone at work. I'd much rather work an 11-8 shift. Unless they decide to put a mid shift in my department, that won't happen. I've been told by the old store manager that I would have to leave my department to get a mid shift. I don't think that's fair. I'm good at what I do. I am darn good at what I do, not to toot my own horn.

Anyways a lady is coming to see me today at work that I know from the internet. No, its nothing like that. Around here people paint rocks and hide them in town. When you find one, you go to a facebook page and post a picture saying you found it and where you found it. That way the person that painted it and hid it can know what happened to their rock. It may sound silly, but it's actually fun. This lady paints rocks, and she hidden them around my department at work. She knows they brighten my day so much to find them. She painted this beautiful ladybug rock for me that I kept at work. Well, it appears someone may have stolen it. I know. Stealing a rock. Anyway she said she would paint another one for me. Last night she messaged me on facebook and asked if I was going to be at work today. So maybe I'll get to see her today. I should post some pics of the rocks. A thought for later.

There was an earthquake this morning. Apparently I slept through it. lol. It wasn't a big one. 5. something, I think. Anyways I missed the whole thing.

My roommate wrecked his moped the other day. He was turning, and the lady behind him crossed on a double yellow line trying to pass him. He couldn't stop. So he hit the back of her car. The moped is a total loss. He was scrapped up a little, but he's okay. Sore, as you can imagine, but he still went to work the next day. Idiot. Yesterday though he was pretty sore. So he stayed home. Good call.

Well It's time for me to head to work for the day. Have a good day BMR.
 
I have a cold. Yes, it's a cold. Three people in my family have it. So the fact that I caught it shouldn't surprise anyone. I'm already taking cold meds. I bought some today. Of course I'm not thrilled to be sick, by no means. It's not the best of times to be sick these days. Still, as I said, it's just a cold. My sense of taste and smell are fine. I'm not currently running a fever, I don't think. No headache. Yes I've got a cough, but it's not that bad. Really. I'm okay.

I'm lying in bed as I type this, knowing I should be off to sleep, but the fact is I want to finish this movie on Netflix. It's cliché really, and if you saw 50 Shades of Grey, then you've seen something close to this. 365. Imagine a reversed 50 Shades concept. He kidnaps her, explains his fascination with her, and then tells her he's giving her 365 days to fall in love with him. If she doesn't in that time frame, he will let her go. Now he's a mafia boss. lol. So money isn't a problem for him. She, of course is resisting, but in the true fashion that I hate about some rps, she gives in way too soon. I'm sorry, but if a man kidnaps you, you're not to pass up a chance to call for help as soon as he gives you the means to do so. She did so. He gave her back her phone and laptop, and she passed on calling for help. It was pretty soon after he had taken her that he gave it back to her. Nah. I ain't buying it. When I rp those kinds of scenes, I try to be as realistic as possible. My character will fight and resist for as long as I feel like it would take. Now sometimes that may seem too long for a partner. Too bad. If you don't like how I rp a situation, don't ask me to do it. Problem solved. Go find some other person who will give in after one day or the first time your character rapes her. It's not my style.

Of course it doesn't seem like I do much rping these days. I am currently working on a reply for a rp that I have going on Discord. In fact, I have two rps going on Discord. One takes finesse. The other one comes as easy as breathing to me. My partner and I work so well together. Two halves to the same coin. She deserves better. They both do. My one rp in thread here is caught up. So....yay. lol. I'm trying. I showed interest in a group rp here, but I think I'm going to be backing out of that one. I have my reason.

Well, I think I'll get back to that movie and friend. Have a good night BMR.
 
I was just sitting here thinking about a Christmas movie my family watches every year. A Christmas Story is a tradition for us. I think my parents actually own a copy of the movie, but we never watch it. We always wait until it's on TV. Without the commercials, it just isn't the same. I know that sounds silly. My dad even has a smaller copy of the famous leg lamp. The dad in the movie reminds me so much of my own dad. He was tough, and the kids did not want to ever face their dad when they know they had done something wrong, but in the end, the dad was a softie. He really cared for his kids, and he did everything he could to give them everything they needed and wanted.

When I was younger, we always went to grandma's house. Grandma and grandpa lived about half an hour away. They were my mom's parents, and they lived in a small town. I mean a small town. We would stop off at a chicken fast food place and get a bucket of chicken on the way. This one time we were on our way to see them. We passed by this homeless man sitting on a bench at this field that middle school would use for gym class. I know this because I went to that very field for class. It was cold, and this man was just sitting there. When we got to the chicken place, which was literally just down the road from him, my dad ordered an extra meal. Now I wasn't paying attention, or I simply didn't notice when he did it, but when he did what he did next, I noticed. He turned the car around and backed into where the man was sitting. I turned around the seat and watched my dad go up to this man he didn't know, sit down beside him, and offer him the food. He sat there with him for a few minutes talking. When he got back in the car, I didn't ask him what they were talking about, not that I remember, but that image my dad doing something like that for someone he didn't know has stayed with me. You see, that's the kind of man my dad is. Sure he's a grumpy, grouchy, pain in the behind man that sometimes makes me madder than anyone else on the planet every could, but he's my dad. He always will be, and I know if I need anything, and he can do it, my dad will.

I'm talking about my dad because a few days ago he went to the er. A few times a year my dad is prone to getting sick. He gets the same symptoms every single time. We know what's going on when he does. The last time it happened was in February. He had gotten up to go to the bathroom. When he got right beside his bed, his legs gave out, and my dad fell. He hit the nightstand by his bed and broke a rib and cracked a few more. He also punctured his spleen. He was bleeding internally. They flew him to another hospital. We thought they were going to have to take it out. It began to clot, and they left it in. So this time, when my dad got sick, he wanted to go. I think what happened to him last time scared him. I don't blame him. So my mom called an ambulance to come and take him to the er. His symptoms look so much like Covid that they tested him. Of course that came back negative. Thank God. Well they noticed something else though. He had had a light heart attack. So they did a heart cath on my dad. 90% blockage and 80% blockage. They wanted to put a stent in. So he had to be sent to another hospital. Now when I got the news about the light heart attack, I was at work being told over the phone. Heart attack. Dad. Those are words you never want to hear together. I've seen my dad sick. I've seen my dad hurt, but this? No this has been scary. They put one stent in, and he has to go see a doctor in a week. He came home today. I talked to him on the phone, but I haven't seen him yet.

I lost someone I really cared for. This was a man I loved with all my heart, and he had heart problems. So this has brought demons back I didn't want to face again. I'm jealous of my mom. She got to spend this time with my dad. When this man was in the hospital, I had to walk away, and before I could get back to him, he was gone. I lost that last day. I'm not ready to lose anything else. I know it'll happen one day, but not yet. I'm not ready. I know. You're never ready, but please just not yet.

Tell the people in your life how important they are. Tell them what they mean to you. You never know when they could be gone. This precious life that we all hold dear and live is so fragile. It doesn't take something like Covid to take it all away either. So don't waste any time. Good night BMR.
 
Do you ever just meet someone and get a bad feeling about them? It could be in person or online. You don't know why exactly, or maybe you do, but you get this bad feeling about them. You don't want to share with anyone, or you don't want to share with too many people, why. There's that fear that they might think you're nuts or overreacting, but it's there, that feeling that you just don't like them. Now sometimes when I feel that way I can grow to eventually like the person. It shows me that maybe I was wrong about them, or I truly was nuts. lol. It happens. There is this manager at work that I really do want to like, but I'm telling you, it's not easy. He's a jerk. He's an asshole, but there are times he will talk with me. Those are the times I wonder am I wrong? Am I being too critical? Should I give him another chance? Should I try harder with him?

The thing is, it's not just in real life where I feel this way. Yes there have been people on this very site that give me a bad feeling. I can talk to them, work with them even, but I still get this bad feeling. It's strong, and I just can't ignore it. I wonder if other people feel that way. Heck there was even this one person on this site that I simply didn't like. Never spoke a word to said person. Said person never spoke to me, but I did not like this person. It's crazy. Who know. Maybe if we had spoken to one another we might have actually gotten along. *thinks for a moment* Nah!

I know it's not the right way to be. Everybody deserves a chance when you first meet them. Everybody. What they do with that chance can then define how you feel about them. Maybe I have given people chances, and they mucked it up. Maybe I gave that manager a chance, and he mucked it up. Should I keep trying, giving him chance after to chance to only prove later on that he really is a dill hole? I don't know. Someday he will be my boss. The company I work for rotates managers around from their departments every so often. So sometime in the future he very well could be my boss. Scary thought actually. I don't want him to be. *shivers*

Well, those are my thoughts at 9:25pm here. Have a good evening BMR.
 
Well, it's another fine day here. Today brings work. Almost one month ago I made a decision. I told my guy that we should just call it quits. He had some smart butt comment that he made. It was one I didn't dignify with a response. I simply made like Elsa and let it go. I went on about my life. Did I think about him? Yes. Every single day I thought about him. I wanted to reach out to him, to message him, but I didn't. It was hard not to. Then one day there he was, messaging me. I was polite, answered his message, and then he asked if I ever thought about him. I told exactly the same thing I have said here. Every single day. He acts like he still loves me, but I know it isn't love. It's not because I'm cynical. It's because the way he treated me isn't love. You don't ignore someone you claim to love for days, not see them for weeks, and then just show up out of the blue, as if you're some treat for them, expecting them to drop whatever plans they had for that current time because you love them and they love you. No. That's not love. I may be a lot of things, but I'm not stupid enough to buy that. So I'm being kind to him, but I'm not telling him I love him. No. He has said he was trying to tell me he loved me, but that's it.

He's not the only strange thing that has happened lately. Another ex of mine, one I can actually be polite with as well, despite the fact that he completely ripped my heart apart and made an idiot out of me, contacted me as well. I think he may be flirting with me. What makes that so....I don't even know the word to describe it....is that he's married. He has moved on with his life. The woman he is married to is the first relationship he had after me. Now granted we were together for a while. He was my date to my senior prom in high school. lol. I just don't get it. Maybe he's not so happily ever after. I don't know.

And that's not where it ends. A partner of mine reached out. I was happy to hear from him to say the least. It wasn't about rping together at first. No matter. I was still happy to hear from him. Then the other day he asks if I would like to pick up our old rp. Oh my goodness. Sadly I had to decline, for now, as I don't want to bite off more than I can chew. I told him that some free time may be freeing up in the next few weeks. If it does, then ok. Like I said, I don't want to bite off more than I can chew. I did that before. I was so invested in so many rps that I burned out, took a lot of time away from BMR. It's why I'm struggling to get back into writing. I know if I take on too many rps that I'll feel overwhelmed with replies, and once again, I'll get burned out and leave. I don't want to do that. I love it here at BMR. I love writing. I love the whole creative process of coming up with plots and characters. There's no way I want to lose that again. So here I am, limiting how much I take on. I should have been that responsible to begin with. It was a combination really of taking on too much and not enough free time. It made for a bad mix, but it's in the past now. Now I'm looking forward. Still, it made me happy that he's still interested in our rp and that he reached out.

I don't understand why all these people are reaching out to me lately. I find it wonderful. I asked someone if I had a beacon over my head calling out to people. lol. It's strange, but I like it. Now, sadly, the time has come to end this entry and get ready to head out for the day. It's only 10:01am here, and already my day is pretty much over, in the sense that I have free time that is. I won't have free time again until 5pm, and even then it's only an hour. From there I won't get any free time 10pm. It's disheartening. It makes me not want to work. Even then I wouldn't have free time though. My family is demanding. That's for another day though. That's a can of worms I do not wish to open right now, if I haven't already done so here. Have a good day BMR.
 
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