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Missing Parts(lady/moon)

“...I’d love to see a puppy. I mean, the kid’s a kid right?Kid’s should have puppies. We could adopt it, name it the official avengers mascot, cause dude, kids like heros, we should totally have a puppy for him.”Tony rambled a bit as he tapped on his tablet, absently watching the scene before him before raising a eyebrow. “....Have you told Bruce this?He might actually like, kiss you if tell him you made some of those.”Tony snickered before looking at the woman, watching the reporter tremble. “I know. I’ll deal with it. I already have Pepper working on it. SI’s legal team will deal with Shield.”Tony said watching him go before looking at loki.”get her out of here. She’s already done enough damage. I’ll deal with the rest of it.”

Elena meanwhile was slouched over her knees, swallowing a little as she heard the elevator open, turning her head a little to watch Clint come down. Before resting her head in her hands, closing her eyes, taking short calm breaths, refusing to have the panic attack that was threatening, trying really, really hard to not freak out as she tried to figure out what to say. “...Tony wanted to show you the news didn’t he?”she muttered. “Jarvis told me he had a order to not let us see without tony talking to us first....but it seems even AI's as intelligent as Jarvis don't always predict humanity's desire to gossip about everything..."
 
Loki snorted and pressed his hand firmly to the woman's stomach. she would miss three periods and swell. when she went to the doctor to find out if she really was pregnant, she'd find a simply mild infection that medication could cure. but she'd completely panic until then. "i do not speak to people Tony. you know this." he stated with a scoffing noise before he cursed the reporter with a severe case of acne which would break out for the next three weeks. he figured that was enough of a punishment. "next time. be more aware of who you're fucking with mortal." he hissed before he waved a finger at her. she vanished, and would land in the middle of the Central Park pond.

Clint stalked back to his room and paused as he saw Elena huddled up in a corner. "no. he wanted me to deal with the reporter that Loki kidnapped." he admitted. "Tony has legal on it. we think Shield is involved and i intend to give a press release myself... once i figure out how to do that." he admitted. "we can decide what i'll say together." he promised her as he settled down next to her. "i won't let them turn this into a circus Elena." he promised, taking her hand. "i refuse to. we might not be lovers. we might not be husband and wife. but you always have been, and always will be my best freind. i won't let some bitch on a screen make you out to be an enemy. and i won't let you face this alone."
 
Tony snickered watching the man, amused that the woman was looking at him with wordless pleas. “Don’t look at me like that. You probably just fucked up whatever they have going on. Deal with it.”Tony said watching her disappear smirking as he looked at Loki.”You do realize, you just did something nice, outside of having sex, right?And for someone you don’t even like.”he teased looking amused.

Elena shifted to look at him, before raising a eyebrow as she shuddered. “...Why did loki have the reporter?”She questioned looking curious before sighing quietly, “Ask tony. He’s been doing press releases long enough he’d probably be able to do it in his sleep.”she said before shuddering more as he settled next to her, slumping against him slightly, closing her eyes. A quiet pained smile tilting her lips as she thought about that. Knowing she was freaking out for something fairly simple. And not wanting to tell him what drove her to that edge, because she knew he was already pissed at shield, no reason to tell him exactly what fury’d had ‘clint’ say to her when she was weak and helpless, holding a newborn. “Good. Cause I really, really don’t want to be a enemy.”She muttered starting to cry softly, the last few days to emotion filled for her not to.
 
Loki snorted. "oh. i didn't do anything nice. that woman is going to think she's pregnant for the next three months and she's going to have terrible acne for the next three weeks. she might even scar." clearly, Loki had misunderstood what Tony meant. "besides. no one fucks with a child on MY watch." or maybe he hadn't. "i hate people Tony. but children are sacred to people like me. to hurt a child is an automatic death sentence." he stated, his eyes going red. "that woman could very well have hurt Alex and Elena and i know she hurt Clint and Elena's relationship. that is not allowed."

he shrugged. "i think he likes Alex." he admitted. "Loki has this thing about kids." he admitted. "i guess he was gettign information... or revenge. i'm not really concerned either way." he admitted. "yeah, Tony can help." he agreed with a smile before he gathered her into his arms and let her sob into him. "you will never be an enemy." he promised her. "and i'll never let you go again." he promised softly. holding her until she calmed down. "...we really have to have one of those heart to heart talks." he admitted with a sigh. "but not now. your exaughsted." he admitted, stroking her hair. "are you going to be alright sleeping on your own or do you want to sleep in my room? i don't actually have a bed, but i have a fold out couch you could sleep on."
 
Tony rolled his eyes but didn’t bother to correct him on the nice thing he’d done, knowing Loki would never admit that it was nice. “It wasn’t alex they messed with. It was elena, and Clint. Shield knows all they have to do is hurt her worse then they already did. Upsetting them both would do that.”Tony sighed because he knew why fury had tried to hurt them.Because the avengers had walked out on them, he knew shield had to want them back in the semi-chain of command they had been. “No, it’s not allowed. We’ll take care of them Loki.”

Elena shifted, startling a little as he wrapped his arms around her, it had been a rarity before finding him again, that she’d had someone with her when she broke down. Shuddering a little as she tried to relax she smiled sadly as she calmed down, flinching a little at his words. “...do we have to?”She muttered, sounding tired. Sounding so exhausted. “....”She blushed a little before swallowing, knowing she wasn’t in any shape to be alone. “You still sleep in a hammock?Can...can I sleep with you?I mean, it wont be roomy, but...”She stared down, fidgeting with her clothes, a nervous habit, because she hated to admit that she wanted held and needed it after seeing the news that had shaken her badly.
 
Loki snorted. "yes, and their pain will affect Alex. the kid needs his father." actually, Clint needed Alex more than the other way around. "they will recover from this easily enough. Clint will probobly be up here tomorrow talking press release and a meeting for said press." he admitted. "he's going to want to counter this." he admitted with a shake of his head. "by the way... Fury's going to break out in a full body case of the Hives." he admitted with a smirk. "...Tony?" Loki asked suddenly. "even if i did like them... which i don't... do you think they'd like a housewarming gift? which i would never get them anyway... but if they did appreciate such a thing, which they probobly wont, what would i get them?... not that i will..."

he smiled a little. "yeah... i think we do. it's... affecting us right now. when we're feeling better we'll talk." he muttered. "i don't want our past to become an issue... i, i did some regrettable things..." he admitted with a sigh. "yeah i still sleep in a Hammock." he admitted sheepishly before he paused and blinked at her. "we could both sleep on the pull out couch." he decided. "my Hammock isn't big enough for both of us i don't think and i don't want one of us-" him in other words. "-falling out in the middle of the night." he admitted with a smile as he kissed her forehead. "lets go to bed." he murmured, picking her up and carrying her to the bedroom, plopping her intot he Hammock while he tried to figure out how to make the couch unfold.
 
“True....kids need fathers.”Tony muttered his look shuttered as he considered Howard stark, shuddering a little at the idea of alex going through the pain of being seperated from Clint, who had every sign of being so much better then Howard could have ever been. “Probably. And there’s going to be rules. Cause you know, I have things that I wont talk about, or do in front of the cameras, but I have a feeling the reporters are going to ignore them in favor of harassing clint...or the others really. I probably should look into putting rules in place...”Tony frowned before smirking. “Good. Fury deserves it.Wish I had pictures.”He said before looking a little startled at the other’s question but not letting it show much, knowing loki wouldn’t do it if he was questioning it to much. “I think they would, yes. And they’d probably like it....do you think letting him redo the his apartment and letting strange people in counts as my gift, or should I get something else? And maybe something not kid related. I mean, yes, they have a kid. But they’re not just parents...maybe something...oh!She owns a bookstore you know. Get her a rare book or something, and Clint something weaponized or something...I mean, they’re not together, so it’d be kinda awkward to get them something that involves them both, but they’re also not-not together so...urgh. I need to think about this now...”Tony said really thinking about a present now that loki had brought it up.”We should have a housewarming party. Then we all and agonize over what to get them together.”

Elena swallowed biting her lip a little, staring down before nodding. “...you’re not going to like it. I mean...even if it wasn’t you, it’s going to hurt.”She muttered fidgetting before smirking. “To bad you don’t have that two person hammock you did have.”She muttered looking thoughtful before snickering.”You. You always fell out, even if the hammock was big enough.”She pointed out before smiling a she picked her up, snuggling down into the hammock as she sat down, snickering as she watched him work out the couch. “Here...let me.”She muttered getting up and climbing out of the hammock and helping him get the bed out of the couch, before flopping down onto it with a tired sigh, already mostly asleep when he climbed in.
 
Loki nodded a little. "some kids could do without certain fathers. but Clint is a good man.... and if you tell him i said that, i'll fill your cupcakes with arsenic." he warned. "rules? perhaps i should be the one to lay down the rules?" he asked, smirking as he examined the news where his 'victim' was having a breakdown right there on TV, wailing about how he'd stuffed a puppy in her and how she was going to give birth to a freak. "they will all fear me after that." he admitted with a snicker as he watched them. "i should get an official title. the Avenger's Enforcer, yes that sounds lovely." Loki mused with a snicker. "a rare book. yes that's a good idea. Clint got her one too i think. but it hasn't gotten here yet. i'll ask him what her favorite books are." he decided with a grin. "Clint is easy enough, i'll get him an Asgairdian Bow. with enchanted arrows." he examined his nails, picking at the dirt under them. he was so vain sometimes. "ah, that's a good idea! i'll make a cake." Loki decided. "...i better make two, there's a lot of us." he admitted with a grin as he shook his head. "nah, i will make the 'Good Captain' make the cakes." he decided. "i'll make alcoholic cupcakes... oh, i fixed the problem by the way, so you can have your cupcakes again."

he nodded. "i know. but then, you're not going to like it much either." he admitted before he smiled at her. "it's still back..." back in the HQ. "Steve was able to gather all your things though, it might be in there." he admitted with a shrug before he snorted. "only because you're a hammock hog." he complained with a shake of his head. "thanks." he watched her unfold the couch nearly effortlessly and sighed, shaking his head as he gathered up his massive piles of blankets and tossed them onto her before he joined her in bed. "goodnight."
 
“He is a good man. And you can’t do that!I’m a alcoholic, not immortal. I wouldn’t survive arsenic!”He whined but looked amused before smirking. “Rules or writing stuff about us. I mean, not all of us as comfortable in front of the camera as I am.”he snickered looking amused as the ‘victim’ broke down, before smirking. “You could announce that at the press conference, that you’ve been named enforcer.”he snickered before smirking. “Good. We’ll have things to give them.”he said looking pleased with the idea of a party and making sure elena knew that both her and alex were welcome in the tower before smirking. “Capsicle makes wicked good cakes. I’ll tell him in the morning. And good!I need cupcakes.”he said looking pleased with being able to have them before getting up, stretching tiredly. “We better get some sleep. I have a feeling tomorrow’s going to be a long day.”he said smiling as he headed for his room.”Night, Loki.”

“Ahhh.”Elena smiled before perking up a little. “Awesome. I’ll talk to him in the morning.”She said sounding pleased with having her stuff back, and the copies of the hannibal books she’d had, even if it was simply so she could give them to him, since he had been so happy at seeing her first edition copies. “Welcome.”She muttered tiredly as she snuggled into the bed, “Night.”She muttered. In the morning Alex ran into the room, it was actually nearly 9, the boy having been playing in his room before he’d gotten hungry enough to go looking for his mother, frantic as he pounced on clint, not seeing elena under the pile of blankets. Scared that his mother wasn’t in her room, shaking clint's shoulder, and patting his cheek trying to wake him up. “Hawk!Mama’s gone!Where’s mama?!”
 
Loki chuckled a little. "alright, salmonella then." he decided. "you'll survive that." he decided before he nodded. "you should have you're names trademarked." he pointed out. "i mean, i know they already are concerning goods, trades, and advertising, but you need protection from the press as well. especially if they're going to LIE." unfortunately, freedom of the press and all that, you couldn't do such a thing. "i would make a good enforcer. you people are much too noble to take revenge for yourselves." he admitted with a shake of his head. "i haven't quite figured out how to make a cake." he admitted. "cupcakes where hard enough." he admitted with a sigh and a shake of his head. "i'm better with meat." he admitted. "i'll make some steaks or something."

Clint grunted as Alex patted him on the shoulder and he reached over, grabbed the boy and held him up in the air like he was doing an airplane, blinking sluggishly at the boy. "morning Kiddo." he chirped as soon as he realized it was Alex he was holding, giving him a grin. "Mummy's fine. she had a nightmare last night and crawled into bed with me. shall we wake her up?" he asked the little boy. "i think we need to tickle her awake." he teased, gently rolling the blankets down, well aware that Elena was awake. "okay, on three, ready? one. two. three!" and with that, he tickled her neck, right where he knew it tickled her the most. a bit of fun would help Alex feel better about his 'mummy going missing'.
 
"Can't do that.but if we intimidate them enough they should stop writing without checking with us." Tony sighed before smiling."you would. Though I don't think that job was what Odin had in mind when he left you with us."Tony smiled."help steve makes the cake then.he'd probably be thrilled someone else besides him is learning how to cook." He snickered because it was true.most of them were hopeless in the kitchen."

Alex squeaked a little as clint picked him up."yes.mama needs to make good." The two year old decided looking happy his mother was still there.Elena yelled squealing in laughter as both of her boss attacked her squirming away."okay okay I'm up!"she yelled as Alex tried to keep tickling her even as she got up."keep it up barton, and I won't make you breakfast."she earned though she looked amuses more then asked, probably cause it wasn't the first morning Alex had pounced on her to wake get up.
 
there was a pause and then. "i think making a woman thing she's going to give birth to a puppy is intimidating enough that the news station she's from isn't about to risk my wrath. we just have to properly intimidate the other ones... i can do that." he admitted with a smirk before he shrugged. "Odin gave me no explicit orders. he just told me to help and dumped me in your laps." he pointed out. "i'm helping. therefor, meeting the terms of my punishment. just because i'm enjoying it, means nothing." he admitted with a smirk. "besides, i know how to cook... i know how to cook Asgaurdian cuisine. i'm still trying to figure out human food."

"ha! you have to feed me, your sense of morals will not allow me to go hungry!" he chirped, looking quite pleased with himself. "he slept in pretty good this morning." he admitted with a grin as he slid out of bed with a yawn and a stretch. "alright you little monkey!" Clint teased, scooping the boy up and tickling him. "let's get you dressed so Mama can make food for hungry two year old bellies." he flashed her a wink and 'tossed' Alex over his shoulder and carried the laughing boy into his own bedroom. "lets see! what outfit should you wear today?!"
 
“I want it on video tape, when you go to intimidate the others. It’ll be epic.”Tony snickered before shrugging.”Humans don’t know human food. You’re doing impressively enough.”He teased yawning before getting up.”I’m going to bed.See you.”He said disappearing into his own bedroom before he gave into the urge to invite loki to bed with him.

“There’s others in the tower that can cook for you.Natasha can, or steve.”She said twitching a little at the mention of the russian before nodding.”He did. Overexcitement, and hopefully, he’s going to settle down and sleep like this normally instead of up early.”She muttered looking amused as Alex squealed in laughter. “Shorts. I-ren man shirt!”He squealed happily squirming out of clint’s arms to search for the clothes he wanted, pouting when he couldn’t get the drawers open. Stepping into the bedroom Elena smiled watching them,”Tony invited us up to the penthouse for breakfast. And said to tell you he wasn’t cooking, but Steve was. Apparently he didn’t think you’d come if you thought he was cooking.”She said sounding amused, and wondering if the genius really was that horrible at cooking.
 
he smiled a little. "Steve is a good cook." he agreed with a chuckle. "if we're really lucky, we can train him to go to bed at seven and sleep until ten!" he chirped with a grin before he groaned. "nooo. not the Iron Man shorts! how about you wear Hulk shorts? Hulk is MUCH cooler!" he teased even as he pulled out the red and gold shorts and the matching shirt. "Toyn did?" he demanded, looking completely panicked before he realized Steve was cooking. "Tony made an omelet once that was both runny and burned." he stated simply. "it's bad. if Tony cooks, never ever eat what he offers, no matter how nice it looks." he warned, making a face at Alex. "why's he gotta love Iron man so much? i'm never going to hear the end of this." he complained as he swing Alex up onto his hip much like he had seen Elena do and headed up the stairs where Loki was sipping on a hot cup of... well he called it tea, but it was made out of a moss that came from Asgaurd and tasted like petrol almost. it was disgusting, and Loki drank it religiously in the mornings. Bruce watched Alex come in and wondered if the little boy would realize that Loki was the 'bad alien man' who had tried to take over the world. he knew Alex would recognize Tony at the very least. he wanted to laugh as he realized the little boy even had Iron Man shoes. Tony was going to be intolerable for a week or more.
 
“You might, but I wouldn’t count on it.”Elena snickered a little. “But-but I-ren man! I have hulk shorts. And hawk shorts!And-and cap shorts. But I want I-ren man!”Alex demanded but looking pleased when Clint dressed him in his shorts shirt and shoes, despite his protests. “He did....and how can it be runny and burnt?”Elena blinked slowly, not sure if she believed him or not. “I dunno. He’s always liked iron man.”elena snickered because she just knew tony was never going to let this go, would probably make alex’s fascination worse if anything. “I don’t know how you drink that sh-uh-Stuff.”Tony corrected himself as he made a face at loki, correcting his cursing when he he saw the toddler. “Hawk!Down. It’s iron man. I want to sit with him.”Alex demanded. “What?Uh...”Tony looked startled at the boy wondering how he could get out of holding a toddler(he just didn’t do well with kids, thats why he had cap. The good captain was amazing with kids), before doing a double take, realizing what he was wearing, his smirk growing wider. “If you insist.”Tony said smiling a little as he pushed out the chair next to him, smirking at clint. "Yay!"Alex grinned happily making his mother smother her laughter, so trying not to laugh at the look on tony's face, or clint's.
 
Clint sighed. "But Iron man is soooo booooring." he teased with a grin as he tied the shoes. "really! i swear, he's VERY boring." he assured the little boy with a sagely nod before he looked at Elena and nodded. "i assure you. it's true. i have pictures." he admitted. "and honestly... i have no idea how he managed it." he admitted. "it's because Iron Man get's the most screen time." he mused. "i don't know how you eat the stuff you eat either." Loki stated simply. "remember that my taste buds are not the same as yours." he pointed out with a grin as he watched the child rush across the room. "alright, you go sit with I-Ren-Man." he teased with a snicker as he watched Tony before sighing as Tony's own smug little smirk formed. "Alex! make sure that you get I-Ren-Man sticky with syrup okay?" he demanded. "he'll love it. make sure to get it in his hair and on his face too!" "Clint! Alex, don't listen to him. putting syrup on people is very rude." Bruce corrected, glaring at Clint who sighed. "listen to Uncle Bruce then. since he seams so determined to ruin my fun." "u...Uncle...Bruce!?" Bruce choked, shocked. "So what's for breakfast Captain?" Clint asked curiously, watching Steve cook.
 
“No.No he’s not. He’s pretty!So shiny.”Alex nodded as equally sagely, and elena nearly stuffed her hand in her mouth to keep laughing out loud at Alex’s denial. “Probably. Out of all of you, Tony spends the most time getting in the tabloids and tv. I mean, he is a billionaire playboy after all.”she snickered a little watching tony. Tony raised a eyebrow looking at clint. “While I’m not a fan of sticky, you do realize I spend most of my day covered in oil right?I mean, syrup wouldn’t be the worst thing I got covered in.”Tony said refusing to let clint ruin his good mood at seeing Alex dressed in iron man things. Alex looked between the adults, looking confused before nodding slowly. “Okay. No syrup on Iren man.. Only on food.” “Tony kiddo. If your going to live here, I’m tony.” “Tony.”Alex said slowly before smiling pleased at being invited to call tony by name. “French toast.”Elena grinned looking happy as she leaned over to look in Steve’s skillet before digging in the fridge to get something to drink before rolling her eyes. “It looks like a frat house’s fridge in here, beer, snacks, and one thing of milk.”She snickered. “That’s why we have our own fridges and don’t rely on Tony to supply us with food. He eats like he’s still in college.”Natasha said smiling as she walked into the room, ruffling alex’s hair as he craned his head back to look at her. “Hi!” "Morning, Alex."
 
Clint snorted. "he sure is. you'll have to tell him how shiny he is later." he agreed, looking close to laughing himself. "...hadn't realized that, no." he admitted with a sigh before he smirked at Tony. "no. i imagine the worst things you've been covered in come from angry women." he teased with a snicker. "oh! that reminds me!" he smacked Tony's arm. a playful hit. "that's for seducing my baby mama!" Bruce and Steve both started laughing. "how long have you been waiting for that one?" "a while. Elena made me promise to do it where she could see." Clint admitted with a snicker as he shook his head. "you just don't like him butchering your superhero name." he teased Tony with a chuckle as Loki set another patch of moss to steep. "i like French toast." Clint admitted with a grin as he glanced at the fridge. "we'll give the Little Man some milk. or i can run out and get some apple juice?" he asked, his head tilted. "i need to go grocery shopping anyway, as you noticed, my fridge is full of... well. collage food. we need some healthy kid food too." he admitted frowning. "...i have no idea what that would be. you'll have to make me a list or go shopping yourself..."
 
“I will.”Alex said wisely. Tony tilted his head thinking about that. “Pro-Ow!D-clint!”He whined sulking as he looked at the man sitting next to him, the drama queen that he was rubbing his arm. “Besides, it was a frame job!I didn’t do anything!”He whined. Elena smirked looking amused as she shook her head. “It was quite amusing really. I was so pleased at the idea of hitting tony for it.”She rolled her eyes. “Well, Tony is easier to say then Iron Man. And he looks so happy about using it.”Tony smiled looking amused that alex was so pleased at getting to call him by name. Oh yea, he was going to enjoy being Alex’s favorite...at least for now. He had a feeling he was going to be on babysitting duty because of this, and that soon enough Clint was going to be the favorite. But he was going to enjoy it for now. “Alex?” “Milk.”Alex said smiling happy as his mother poured him a drink, sipping it slowly out of the small cup she gave him. “I’ll go out and get some things. It’ll be fine.”She smiled kissing his cheek, amused that he was so concerned about having the right food. Rubbing a hand over her face looking thoughtful, remembering what he’d said the night before, and wondering just how long she could avoid the heart to heart, when she knew shield was going to be breathing down their necks, and he needed to do the press conference, and that things were complicated for them simply because of how much attention people were going to pay attention to what was happening in the avengers tower.
 
Clint smirked a little. "oh i barely touched you, big baby." he complained with a roll of his eyes, Loki sighing a little. "i should have known that the child would be more quite than the both of you." he teased, Clint smirking. "that's because Alex has a proper mother to teach him manners. me and Tony never had that." he admitted. "...then what's my excuse?" Bruce asked, lifting his eyebrow. "too shy. and Captain learned his manners in the Boy-Scouts." "...that's true actually." Steve admitted with a chuckle. "Tony is a lot easier to say." he agreed with a chuckle. "you like Milk, huh little man?" he asked with a smile at his son. "well, just remember that i don't have anything at all really." he warned. "most of the stuff i have is... well you saw." it was boxes of mac and cheese and a few dozen frozen meals. there was even a full cupboard of MRE's. there was a few apples, and that was about it. "oh, before i forget, Tony. i wanted your help with a press release." Clint admitted. "i don't want to lie to the people but the truth is a bit too personal so...." he glanced at Alex. "especially since some people don't know yet." the message was clear. 'i haven't told Alex i'm his father yet'. "oh! i almost forgot! Hey Alex! tell Tony why he's your favorite!"
 
“We’ll bond over our absent mothers, if this means I get to spend time with your baby mama to learn some manners now.”Tony said with a playful leer, there was no true flirting in his eyes, just sheer amusement at winding Clint up. Smirking at Steve.”You are such a boy scout, old man. I feel like I need to go do something scandalous to just make up for you being so good.”Tony twitched a little. “Yep.It’s good for me to.”Alex said serious smiling as he looked up at Steve as the man gave him a plate of french toast.”Thank you.” “Thanks cap.”Elena smiled as she cut up alex’s food before letting him eat, starting to eat her own before wrinkling her nose at clint’s words.”I so don’t want to consider eating the MRE’s. I don’t like them.”She shuddered at the idea, tensing a little at the idea of the press conference. “I already have pepper getting the conference hall cleared for this morning. I figured you would want one. And Reindeer, you’re coming to. You’re new job title and all, we’ll intimidate them to just not being overwhelming.”Tony smiled slightly. “We’ll figure out what to say.”He promised before looking startled at clint’s words, looking down at the boy. “He’s shiny!And bright!Pretty!”Alex said so focused on his food and stuffing his face he didn’t notice the sputtering billionaire next to him.
 
Clint snorted. "leave my baby mama alone you Milf stealing pervert." there was a pause and then. "what's a Milf?" Steve asked, baffled as Loki leaned over and whispered in the mans ear. Steve went bright red and started to sputter and he turned back to cooking immidiatly. "you do enough scandalous things as it is Tony." Steve pointed out, sounding quite annoyed. Steve had even been nice enough to cut up Alex's toast into bite sized pieces. "i used to live off them." Steve admitted in mention to the MRE. "me too." Clint admitted. "in fact, i still do." he admitted with a chuckle. "especially when i'm feeling lazy." he admitted with a shrug before he blinked at Tony. "a...already!?" he demanded, more than a little stunned before he sniggered at Tony's reaction to Alex's ever so innocent statement. "hear that Tony? you're Pretty." Clint teased with a laugh, Loki struggling not to laugh as well, hiding his snickers behind his teacup. the 'waxing and buffing' jokes didn't stop for several minutes.

two hours later, Clint stood before nearly the entire population of reporters and news stations. "Ladies and Gentlemen of the press and populace of the world." Clint stated, his voice firm but calm. "i stand before you today because someone saw fit to think that it was alright to perpetuate lies and wild rumors as truth. the reporter and station in question is now suffering for their lies thanks to the efforts of our new Enforcer." he indicated Loki. "who has, and will take any and all untrue slander of the Avengers and their people as a direct threat to our persons." Clint warned. "so long as you keep your print, and stories to the truth, as is our right to demand, you will not be targeted." Clint assured them. "as for the lies that where told, i will clear up that misunderstanding right here, and right now." as he was being filmed live, Shield could do nothing to stop him. "several years ago, my partner, Elena, and i where on a mission that went wrong. due to some extreme tampering and covering up, i was then led to beleive that a woman who had been my best freind, as close to me a sister, was dead." there where astonished gasps. "this was before the Avengers initiative was even in place, and was barely more than a thought in the minds of those that carried out the conspiracy."

"for the next two and a half years or so, Elena lived alone, as her lover at the time abandoned her shortly after the accident that separated us, led her to be without memory for several months." not the truth, but not a lie either. "Elena is my very close freind, just as Natasha is. along with Bruce, Tony, Steve and yes, even Loki." he informed them. "and i will not have you dragging her, or her son into the news willy nilly as you please. he is a CHILD, and will not understand that your extremely hurtful words about his uncles, or his mother are 'just for ratings'. so be aware that i will be quite furious about anyone who upsets that poor child. especially as he was kidnapped just yesterday in a futile attempt to pull me away from Elena, simply because someone doesn't want me to gain affections outside of my 'job'. whether or not i am dating someone, or have a familial relationship outside of my blood, does NOT give you the right to make petty remarks about them. who i spend my time with, is none of your business. remember that the next time you get an obviously fake email and decide it's the truth."
 
Tony smirked looking amused at steve’s confusion.”You don’t want to know.”He said grinning as Loki told Steve anyways before grinning wider. “True.” “I know, and so did I but they’re still disgusting.”Elena shuddered. “Yea. Figured there was no reason to let things build and give them time to recover from last night. We shock them now, and shield’ll get the message.”He muttered his eye twitching a little as he listened to the jokes smiling as Alex looked up at him in slight confusion.”It’s okay. I am pretty. They’re just jealous they’re not as pretty as me.”Tony sniffed primly looking amused though.

Tony leaned over to Loki smirking a little, “So, how long do you think their questions reduces him to cussing them out?”He muttered watching Clint in amusement even as he watched the crowd, and watching Elena, ready to get her out of here the moment it appeared that she was in distress. Elena shifted the child on her hip, Alex resting her head against her chest, hugging her, mildly distressed that there were so many people around. Stepping forward just as the reporters started shouting questions she shifted alex again, clearing her throat. “I am not one of the avengers, or a celebrity, or someone who really enjoys the attention. I would appreciate that my privacy is respected, not only for Clint, who shouldn’t get rumors and lies spread about him simply because I found him again, but because I don’t want to let my son turn into tony, who has reporters following him everywhere. Even tony admits he doesn’t like it. I don’t want that life for my son. Please, respect my privacy.”She said watching them, barely making it through the speech before the questions revved up again, and she knew it was going to be a lost cause. They weren’t going to stay out of it, and it was going to hurt badly, even if they weren’t being egged on by shield, this was going to be a circus.”I’m going back upstairs.”She muttered to clint before walking out with tony, who for once had no intention of sticking around for a press conference, iron man doing his best to distract Alex as the boy looked upset.
 
"it won't take long." Loki admitted with a smirk. "i'm more interested in when i get to turn them all into fish." he admitted. "of course... i don't want to kill them... perhaps chickens? or maybe ticks? they act like parasites, maybe they aught to be turned into one." he mused. they all listened to Elena before the crowd erupted into questions again and this time it was Loki who stepped forward. "SILENCE!!" the word was might, it was power, and the entire place save the Avengers found themselves completely incapable of making a sound. "You Forget Who You Are Dealing With!" he hissed, his tone soft and cool and sibalant. yet it made everyone shudder. "We are not just celebrities, we are Superheroes. we care nothing for the likes of you. piss us off enough and we might decide the world isn't much worth saving next time." he warned, his eyes glowing with power. "i am their enforcer. it is I who makes the rules now!" he warned, flicking his fingers so that each person had a piece of paper. the rules where simple.

1: you will send all and any articles involving the Avengers through Stark Industries Legal Team for inspection before printing, or you will pay restitution of Asgaurdian kind.

2:you will check each 'fact' for explicit truth before printing it.

3: you will print nothing about Alex until he is at least ten years of age without the explicit permission of one of the Avengers....

the list went along that same lines, outlining what was, and what was not allowed to be printed about the Avengers. "These people are not under any authority but their own. break the rules, and you will find ME making an appearance. most likely in your home, where you think you are safe, and meting out Asgaurdian justice, which may include torture, insanity, pregnancy, or death. you have been warned. now get the fuck out before i turn you all into snails! your voices will return in a few days."
 
Natasha was watching the scene, and despite her status as being so good at controlling her emotions, she was nearly about to stuff her fist into her mouth to keep from laughing as the reporters left looking cowed. Well, maybe they’d stop being such a pain in the ass now. Hopefully, shield to, would get the hint. Though she knew that was a long shot. They’d just get better at trying to drag elena and alex out of clint’s life. “Come on Clint. You have someone who needs you.”She muttered tugging on his arm a little, heading for the elevator.

When they got upstairs tony was half dressed as iron man, just the gauntlets on, allowing alex to inspect the metal. And while he looked vaguely uncomfortable at having a two year old chattering at him, he’d still gone out of his way to distract him from being upset about the circus that was going on downstairs, the boy having started to cry as soon as the shouting had started, even if he didn’t understand, he knew the reporters had wanted something. Elena meanwhile was curled up on the couch watching the toddler and billionaire, nearly choking because she couldn’t not laugh at the scene in front of her. Despite what he said, tony appeared to be okay with kids, at least knowing when they needed distracted. “Hey, little iron, hawk’s back.”Tony smiled as he nodded towards the door, snickering as Alex twisted, before going pelting towards clint. “Thanks tony.”Elena smiled as she stood, gently touching his shoulder, squeezing. She wasn’t sure how the world viewed him as a selfish, self centered bastard when he did the small things. He might forget things, and do some stupid crap, but putting on his gauntlets just to make alex feel better showed he could be kind and think of others if he wanted to.
 
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