guitarfan28
The Punisher
- Joined
- Jan 4, 2012
- Location
- Ohio
Jake just listened and watched her. He understood. Well as much as he could. But he didn't know how to make it easier for her or what to say to help. He took some time choosing his words before would try to talk.
Instead he got up and moved over to her side of the booth. He wrapped his arms around her and leaned his head against her and closed his eyes a moment. "I don't know what to say to make it hurt any less. Or what to do to make it easier on you. If I knew I would do it. But I don't. I can't imagine how hard it is for you. I'm sorry." His arms just held her tight.
"Sorry if I pushed too much onto you. Or are depending too much on you. I thought maybe instead of just staying in the other room was kind of boring and I thought it would maybe help getting to see him. I should have considered your feelings more. I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry." He looked down a moment. "I don't know how to explain this so I'm going to just try...and I get it's different for me and I'm just trying to share where my head is...I can't help I have a son with her. We are a few months late for that. That's my fault and I'm not going to call it a mistake because that would mean that boy is a mistake and I can't do that." His eyes teared up a bit and normally he wouldn't like that in public but his give a damn flew out the window days ago. "If that hurts you I'm sorry. I don't see it as she gave me my first child or my first son. I see God gave him to me for whatever reason. I don't know what that reason is. Or why he's putting him and all of us through this right now. But he is. I have the chance to be a great father to him. That's what I want to do."
"Layla having him is not going to take away from anything when you and I have our child together. As bad as it sounds I'm going to be even more excited about that than I was for Owen. Because I'm so in love with you Adri..." Jake took her face in his hands and looked in her eyes. "I can't wait to have a child with you. I want to cuddle on the couch with you and put my hand on your stomach while the baby is kicking. I want to pick out names together. Listen to the heartbeat with you. Think back about how special and sexy it was making the baby. Then being at the hospital through it all with you." His thumb caressed her cheek. In a calm voice, to just try to explain, "Do you not think I'm struggling too with this. Because it's not with you. This isn't how I dreamt it to be. Do you know how awful I feel that I wish you were his mother. Then again I'm glad you aren't cause I'd hate to see you go through this. But with you he wouldn't have to go back and forth between houses and families. And I know you'd be nothing but an amazing mother. The reason I'm saying you're his stepmom is because I want to include you and have us as a family. I want the three of us as a family." Jake was just scared she didn't want that anymore. "I want us to show him what love is about."
His forehead rested on hers. "Baby I'm sorry. What can I do to make this easier?" He gave her lips a small kiss. "Maybe you shouldn't worry about being strong for me. Maybe I shouldn't worry about being strong for Owen. Maybe we should be strong for each other."
Instead he got up and moved over to her side of the booth. He wrapped his arms around her and leaned his head against her and closed his eyes a moment. "I don't know what to say to make it hurt any less. Or what to do to make it easier on you. If I knew I would do it. But I don't. I can't imagine how hard it is for you. I'm sorry." His arms just held her tight.
"Sorry if I pushed too much onto you. Or are depending too much on you. I thought maybe instead of just staying in the other room was kind of boring and I thought it would maybe help getting to see him. I should have considered your feelings more. I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry." He looked down a moment. "I don't know how to explain this so I'm going to just try...and I get it's different for me and I'm just trying to share where my head is...I can't help I have a son with her. We are a few months late for that. That's my fault and I'm not going to call it a mistake because that would mean that boy is a mistake and I can't do that." His eyes teared up a bit and normally he wouldn't like that in public but his give a damn flew out the window days ago. "If that hurts you I'm sorry. I don't see it as she gave me my first child or my first son. I see God gave him to me for whatever reason. I don't know what that reason is. Or why he's putting him and all of us through this right now. But he is. I have the chance to be a great father to him. That's what I want to do."
"Layla having him is not going to take away from anything when you and I have our child together. As bad as it sounds I'm going to be even more excited about that than I was for Owen. Because I'm so in love with you Adri..." Jake took her face in his hands and looked in her eyes. "I can't wait to have a child with you. I want to cuddle on the couch with you and put my hand on your stomach while the baby is kicking. I want to pick out names together. Listen to the heartbeat with you. Think back about how special and sexy it was making the baby. Then being at the hospital through it all with you." His thumb caressed her cheek. In a calm voice, to just try to explain, "Do you not think I'm struggling too with this. Because it's not with you. This isn't how I dreamt it to be. Do you know how awful I feel that I wish you were his mother. Then again I'm glad you aren't cause I'd hate to see you go through this. But with you he wouldn't have to go back and forth between houses and families. And I know you'd be nothing but an amazing mother. The reason I'm saying you're his stepmom is because I want to include you and have us as a family. I want the three of us as a family." Jake was just scared she didn't want that anymore. "I want us to show him what love is about."
His forehead rested on hers. "Baby I'm sorry. What can I do to make this easier?" He gave her lips a small kiss. "Maybe you shouldn't worry about being strong for me. Maybe I shouldn't worry about being strong for Owen. Maybe we should be strong for each other."