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“Yea really. And probably. He does insane things like that all the time. Seriously, on the way to find thor when he first visited, Phil took out some robbers at a convience store with a thing of powdered doughnuts and a bag of flour. He’s awesome.”Clint snickered before smiling, laughing at that. “Well, at least the whores are all together.”He snickered before laughing. “Yes, yes you’re going to have to tell him that again. He’ll totally flip.”Clint smirked before staring.”...you told him....how did that go?Did sarah totally laugh in his face?”

“Can to.”Tony declared before smirking. “See?Fitz agrees. I’m amazing, therefore I can make jello.”he said even as he closed down the hologram of the eye, not wanting to creep gabe out. “...You said...What?”Tony sputtered staring at James with wide eyes, and ignoring the snickering Clint. “It’s not breast milk. Well. At least not human breast milk. I guess it would be breast milk for a cow.”Clint said thoughtfully, smirking finding loki’s culture shock amusing. “In most cases, they’re grateful for it, for if they’re not milking young, it can grow painful to have milk.”Sarah said looking amused at loki’s intense gaze at the drink
 
James laughed. "that is, completely Epic!" he admitted with a bright grin. "i mean really! Powdered Doughnuts and a bag of Flour! Awesome!" he laughed again and shook his head before glaring hard at Clint. "never call Tony a whore. ever." he ordered. "he takes it personally and i won't have him getting his feelings hurt because you said something offhand." he warned before grinning. "Sa5rah actually added to it, saying he was already kind of her Step-dad." he admitted. "she adores him you know." he admitted with a grin.

"can not." Gabe scoffed before rolling his eyes. "Tony... i'm sorry. but you can't make Jello." Fitz declared, ignoring the fake wounded looks he was now getting from his hero. "i said you where the center of my universe." James reiterated. "why, it's not wrong." he promised, blinking at Tony as Steve sighed and shook his head, looking amused. "it's milk from the breast." Loki stated. "therefor, breast-milk.... if you tell me this came from a male i'm going to be sick." Loki warned, making them all laugh. "it's not from a male." James was quick to reassure Loki who took another small sip and decided it wasn't so bad, since the animal hadn't been hurt. and it tasted pretty nice too. "you'll be happy yo know that we don't eat the animals who give milk either." Steve admitted as he handed Loki a massive salad with bits of fruit and nuts in it as well. "good." Loki stated, pleased that he had a vegetarian option, Thor rolling his eyes. "honestly, i have no idea how i didn't realize." he admitted, making Loki chuckle. :that i was adopted? you know, i'm kind of surprised i never guessed myself." he admitted as he stabbed a strawberry slice and took a taste before trying a slice of Mango. "i adore all the vegetable selections you have here." Loki admitted. "and all these fruits and nuts. Asgard has very few options." he admitted. "most of my meals have to be imported from the Light Elves." he admitted. "not much grows on Asgard."
 
Clint winced at the look he was getting, nodding a little. “I wont. I know no matter how much of a asshole the mask looks like, he’s easily hurt. Don’t worry about it.”Clint said knowing better then to say something offhanded to tony, who took some things, odd things, to heart. Shaking his head in amusement. “I know she does. It’s fairly cute.”

“....What?Even you?You wound me.”Tony sulked shooting fitz a look before staring at james. “...I uh...okay. Okay I can deal with being in a middle of a lifetime movie.”He said sputtering a little looking so out of sorts and not sure what to think about being the center of his universe. “If you think this is alot of selection, you haven’t seen anything yet. We have alot of vegetable choices here.”Sarah smiled before focusing on clint, wanting to settle the bet. “So.Tell us, who’s beating up on loki?”She asked curious. “...James.” “Pay up, Gabe.”Sarah said holding out her hand, before quirking a smirk at him, “Of course, if you don’t have money, I’ll take payment in other forms.”She said smirking. “Sarah!”Tony whined a little at the words, having accepted her as his step daughter, despite meeting her as a adult, he was more disturbed by her sex life and talking then her actual parents, but he never had anyone to fuss over before really, so he was totally fussing overher.
 
James relaxed. "good." he stated happy once more. "he is very sensitive." he admitted with a smile. "he's worn that mask so long he doesn't know how to take it off. he still protests to being called 'kitten' even though everyone in the tower knows he loves it." he admitted with a chuckle. "it is cute! i can't wait for Tony's birthday. she has such wicked plans." he admitted with a chuckle.

"yes. even me." Fitz admitted with a chuckle. "a what?" James asked, confused. "what's a 'lifetime movie'?" he asked. "is it like a Disney Movie?" he asked, his head tilted. "hmmm. i am going to try every single vegetable and fruit this world has to offer." Loki decided as he chewed on his salad, quite happy wit the tangy liquid that had been poured on top. raspberry vinaigrette. "you take bets on morbid stuff like this?" Steve demanded, horrified as Thor snickered. "why should they not? we do betting all the time in Asgar over such matters." Loki nodded. "i won three hundred Silver for betting that Hob would have to be forced off of Thome remember?" "i do! because Loki is Kin to us, we're not allowed to bet, but Loki, and we, will not be upset if you partake. so long as the wagers are discussed outside of master James hearing. we can't have him being influenced." Thor warned, James shrugging. "i have the money." James promised with a chuckle as he examined Tony. "i could be... persuaded to pay you in other ways though." he admitted with a smirk.
 
“...its sort of like a disney movie. Overly sappy, insanely happy unbelievable happy ending. Yes...my life is a lifetime movie now...”Tony said looking utterly confused on how he’d ended up at this point. “Why not? We took bets on who’d seduce who in your happy little threesome there.”Sarah said snickering a little. “And see!it’s not that morbid.” “You already pay me in those ways. Why should I make bets on it, when I have a blond super soldier to corrupt and convince to make bets on it?”Tony teased smirking looking up at steve. “You want to go discuss bets?”
 
Steve chuckled and James smiled, certain he's just been complimented somehow. "you did WHAT!?" James and Steve chorused, shocked as Gabe started to laugh. "it is morbid! following the example of a race of people who think slaughtering animals for fun is not a culture you should be emulating!... no offense Thor." "None Taken! i for one find the idea of driving a chariot as fast as you can in circles for entertainment very baffling." Thor admitted, Loki scoffing. "there is no way you are going to convince me of THAT." he stated. he wasn't that dumb! no one would find that entertaining. Steve just sighed. "fine. come on. i'll be the bookie." Steve promised, rolling his eyes as James chuckled and examined Loki. "no hard feelings, yeah?" "of course not. you are a good friend to the Archer, it only makes sense that he would ask you to take his place... tell me though, is that actually metal?" he asked, sounding very curious. "yes. it's mechanical." "ah! like the Suit of Iron that the Man of Iron wears?" "very similar, yes." James admitted.
 
Sarah smirked at her parents, “We all knew you were going there. We just didn’t know who’d make the first move. If it makes you feel better, Clint lost the most, as he thought it’d be tony.” “Hey, I thought he’d man up after seeing them both hot and sweaty in the sparring ring.”Clint protested snickering a little. “Hey!Did no one think it’d be me?” “No, not really tony. We all bet it’d be james who broke first.”Sarah smirked a little before frowning a little. “...We don’t do chariot races anymore, but we do still do horse racing.”Sarah said thoughtfully smiling at Loki as tony snickered a little. “It’s nearly exactly like it!I made it. It’s awesome.”Tony grinned. Clint rolled his eyes a little, tilting his head towards loki sighing quietly. “Let’s go downstairs. Let’s get this thing over, and I can go use my bow.”Clint said telling jarvis to have phil meet them downstiars.
 
Steve and James glanced at each other before they sighed and shook their heads. ugh, daughters. "you do too!" Thor protested. "i have seen it on the Television! the small metal chariots go in circles and the people cheer and screaming..." "they're called CARS Thor." Steve reminded the other. "and yes, Loki, they do race in circles just like our horse races do." "....that's so boring! i don't believe you." Loki scoffed, rolling his eyes as he watched Tony wig out over the 'almost' comment. "Clint?" Loki asked, looking concerned. "are you certain you are alright for this? if you do not want me physically punished, you can do it in other ways." he assured. "i'm not sure of how Earth punishment works, but if you would rather take one of those options i will not protest." he assured the archer, James watching, waiting to see if his fists where going to be needed or not.
 
“Oh!Nascar. Yes they race. And it is boring, but it happens.”Sarah snickered a little amused at loki’s disbelief before looking at clint worriedly. “Hm?”clint sighed quietly at the sound of his face, thinking about it, biting his lip a little before sighing again, getting up. “No...I...Come here.”He said getting up as he stepped into the living room, searching for a moment for what he knew tony had hidden in the room, smirking slightly at the rubberish looking ball that he had found. The small tech ball was one of tony’s oddest inventions really, able to create and mimic any metal on earth, able to squish and shape into whatever you wanted, as long as it wasn’t to big. Squishing it as he waited for Loki he slid on the brass knuckles, turning to face the man. “Stay still.”He ordered before punching him as hard as he could in the face, and you could say alot of things about clint, but despite being a long distance fighter mostly, he still knew how to throw a punch. Pulling away after a moment he sighed looking at loki.”....It seemed wrong to use James to do it....it’d make me no better then you, using me to destroy my home.”He huffed a little rubbing a hand over his face.
 
Loki just shook his head. "i'll believe it when i see it." he stated with a sniff. clearly thinking they where trying to 'punk' him. Loki tilted his head at the other and then nodded, following, waving off the concerned Thor. Loki knew better than most that Clint wouldn't cross the line. he watched curiously at the ball and hoped he wasn't about to be gagged again. rendering a sorcerer incapable of speech left them utterly helpless. he nodded again at the order to stay still and when the fist connected with his face, broke that rule. he staggered and fell onto his knee, dots dancing in his eyes before he managed to get to his feet again. damn! that had been just as good as one of Thor's punches. "i may have been wrong about the 'strong for a mortal' comment." Loki admitted wryly as he watched Clint. he let the other hit him as much as he wanted and only protested once when he warned that if he was going to hit him in the face, he was going to have to wait a moment or Loki was going to loose most of his teeth. "Your Honor is rare." he admitted. "had you been born a god, you would have been inducted into the ranks of the Vanir." Loki admitted. "they are not unlike what one would imagine when thinking of the earth legends of the Knights of the Round Table." he admitted. "they tell no lies, no no wrong, protect the weak and the innocent and uphold the holy order." he admitted as he wiped some blood off of his face. "you may continue." he assured the other, waiting for the hits to continue.
 
Clint tilted his head, smirking in amusement as he saw loki staring at the ball even as he shaped it into the brass knuckles he wanted. Snickering at loki’s words. “Hm, sparring with your brother and three super soldiers has made sure I had to either become stronger, or resign myself to always losing.”Clint smirked a little even as he got in a few more hits before stepping back at the warning of loose teeth, tilting his head slightly at Loki’s words. “...Tony!Did you hear that! Knight of the round table!” “Yea, Galahad, since you know, you’re going to die a virgin..”Tony yelled back from the kitchen. “Am not!I have alot of sex.”Clint sputtered as he pulled off the knuckles, smirking as he shaped it back into a ball, and waited for tony to stick his head out, before whipping it towards him, snickering at the cute little yelp it caused as tony scampered back into the kitchen. “You can get up. I’m done.”
 
Loki chuckled. "the day someone beats up Thor, is a day i want to see." he admitted. "no one i have ever seen has ever been able to defeat Thor." he admitted. "even Fenrir can't do it." he admitted. he worked his jaw a moment to make sure his teeth where back in place and not about to get knocked out by applying some magic. the other woulds would be left completely untouched. "Don't talk about my Sex life!" Phil ordered back as Loki chuckled at the byplay, pleased that Clint appeared to be feeling better. he watched the little ball whip through the air and blinked at James victorious 'Bullseye!' comment. "very well." he agreed as he shook himself out and touched a few of the breaks with a wince. "it's been a while since someone's been able to hit me that hard." he admitted with a grin. "well done." he praised. "even Thor can't make me see spots like that." he admitted, referring to that first strike. "you should practice with your fists a bit more thought. you would have broken your knuckles on a couple of those if it hadn't been for those.... whatever it was around your fingers." he admitted, mouth moving sluggishly since his jaw was broken, but it didn't appear to bother him too much.
 
“Hm, can’t beat him, but I make him work for it. And steve and james make him work for it to. It’s quite interesting to watch the super soldiers gang up on thor.”Clint snickered a little. “What sex life?You have a sex life?That’s a scary thought.”Tony said yelping, rubbing his forehead and glancing at James. “Don’t sound so happy about him hitting me.”he whined a little, should have known better then to try and avoid a shot from clint, who was a amazing shot. Clint swallowing flushing slightly at the praise, tilting his head a little. “Don’t usually work with my fists, there’s a reason I enjoy using a bow and arrow.”he said before sighing a little, “Brass knuckles. And that’s the point, along with inflicting more harm. Doesn’t mess up my hands more.”Clint shrugged a little, “Come on, lets get some ice on your jaw.”He said heading back for the kitchen.
 
he chuckled. "Super Soldiers are not considered 'mortal'." Loki admitted. "you know. i wonder if perhaps all of you could take down Thor?" he mused. "you took down the Hydra with little enough effort, the meat of the Avengers should be able to take on Thor, yes?" he asked with a smirk as James laughed at Tony's sulking. "you deserved it. mocking a man's virginal status is just something you don't do!" James admitted with a chuckle as he examined Loki. "hmm. sometimes you have little other choice." Loki admitted. "train in it, you have skill there, and it could save your life someday." he admitted. "Brass knuckles. ingenious." he flinched though at the mention of ice and shook his head. "no. thank you. i'm fine." wow. Loki was lying. and they could tell. "Ever since his contact with the Tesseract his Jotun form has been more active. the touch of ice causes him to convert." Thor explained to the others once Loki had fled and was out of earshot. "he is ashamed of what he is, and fearful of his true form." he sighed. "i can convince him of nothing when it comes to his Jotun self." Thor admitted sounding bitter and pained. "Father used to tell us Stories of the Jotun monsters... i cannot fathom why he would tell us such blood chilling stories of Frost Giants when he later wanted Loki to embrace that side of his heritage." Thor grumbled, smiling at Clint. "i am most impressed with you... 'right hook?'... very well done!" Thor admitted with a grin, not mentioning that he was quite certain that Loki's jaw had broken from that first hit alone.
 
“Hm, it might be worth trying someday.”Clint said thoughtfully. “Hey, I didn’t say anything about you. And he’s the one who said he was a knight. I just chose the knight that fit him the best.”Tony huffed a little. “...I’ll have to.”Clint sighed glancing at james and gabe, knowing if he asked they’d help him. After all, that was easier then submitting to natasha and admitting that she’d been right and he needed more training. “...Uh. Okay.”Clint said frowning a little as they watched Loki flee before sighing. “...Because he was quite cruel and a bastard.”Tony shook his head a little smirking a little as clint flushed. “Thanks.”

Sarah rolled her eyes a little, smirking slightly as she looked at gabe, “...So. Does this mean I have to repay you?I mean, he beat him up himself.”she muttered kissing his cheek, smiling slightly looking vaguely worried for clint, knowing he was handling it well, but wondering if he was hiding how he really felt about beating loki up.
 
"i thought Lancelot married Guinevere?" Steve asked, looking startled. "plus he was the most skilled of the knights wasn't he?" he asked with a smirk. "so in a way, didn't you just compliment Clint?" "i think he did." James admitted with a chuckle. "i'm beginning to think so." Thor admitted with a sigh before he smiled at Clint. "how do you feel? any better?" he asked with a grin. "you know. it's rare that Loki is impressed with someone. you should feel very proud of yourself." he admitted, patting the others shoulder. "and no. the 'meat' of the Avengers wouldn't be able to beat me." he teased with a smirk.

Gabe smirked as he watched her. "yes. yes you do." he stated with a chuckle as he smiled at her. "he'll be alright." he assured her. "he has Phil." he assured her with a smile. "besides, sometimes when your life's been torn to shreds, you've just gotta hit the person who did it."
 
“Lancelot had a affair with geniuevere, I called him Galahad, who was lancelot’s son and a virgin prude.”Tony snickered a little rolling his eyes. “Who was also better then his father. Don’t try to wiggle out of admitting you complimented him.”Sarah teased a little. “I do. Oddly enough punching him helped.”Clint smiled a little before sulking. “I’m not so sure. I think we could. We could have tony figure out the math on the possibilities of it and all.” “...Ah!You’re just using me for my brains. I knew it.”Tony huffed.

“Hm, okay.”She snickered a little kissing him before nodding, “He does have phil.”She muttered before tilting her head at him a little, “Well...James is here. I mean, it wasn’t just him, but we did make you remember everything. You could hit him if you want.”She teased a little, running her fingers through his hair, just trying to make him laugh.
 
Steve blinked and then grinned at Sarah. "actually." Thor commented. "Galahad was married and had three children." Thor admitted. "he was loyal, strong, brave and defeated an asgardian bare handed." Thor admitted. "we tell stories of him up in Asgard, it's not many humans who get the attention of Asgardians after all, let alone beat said asgardians." Thor smirked. "that the Asgardian in question was defeated for being 'handsy' with Galahads wife and daughter ensured the perverted bastard never lived it down." Thor admitted with a grin before he beamed at Clint. "i am glad that you feel better!" he admitted. "Tony. shouldn't you be delighted that they like you for your brains?" Fitz asked with a grin. "yeah. it's not as if we like you because your pretty." Gabe admitted with a smirk before glancing at Sarah. "no. i like that i can remember things now." he admitted. "i was deluded before, i'm not now. plus, i can kiss you now." he admitted with a smile.
 
“...Interesting. I think I’ll like having you around, big guy, if you’re going to tell me everything true about the legends.”Sarah grinned at him laughing slightly at the truth. That was pretty cool. “No. Because if they’re using me for my brains, they’re not in awe of how handsome I am, and-” “...You, have to be one of the most eccentrically odd people I know tony. It’s like listening to a kitten meow in outrage over something, and still be adorable.”Sarah teased, just because she knew it would make tony protest even more. “I am not a kitten, or pretty!You two, out. You’re horrible. Don’t you have something you should be doing?”Tony said waving a hand at the couple, shooing them. “Hm, that is always a plus.”Sarah snickered stealing a kiss.
 
Thor shrugged. "i don't know all of them. i only know that one because Loki thought it was delightful that a human could one up a 'stuffy old bastard like him'. then of course Loki got punished for saying bad words." Thor admitted with a chuckle before grinning as he watched Tony fuss and sputter. suddenly both Super soldiers where kissing each of Tony's cheeks. "don't you like being Our Kitten, Tony?" James asked, smirking as he tugged on the collar still wrapped around Tony's neck. James never took his off either. "you are pretty, too." Steve purred. "so pretty you'd look wonderful in the new present i got you." he teased. "very big plus." Gabe admitted with a chuckle as he kissed her again. "come on, your fathers are being gross. let's go hang out at the pool for a while." he offered.
 
“That’s pretty amusing.”Sarah snickered smirking as tony fussed and sputtered, amused as the kisses made him look even more flustered. “I do-I mean, it’s weird being the center of the universe to you, well, no, I mean I’m always the center of attention but-”Tony sputtered moaning quietly at the tug, he never took the collar off, shifting slightly. “present?You got me a present?”He muttered frowning up at the blond, looking curious. Looking oh so adorably flustered and confused. Definitely what clint had intended when he told james to tell him he was the center of the world.

“they are. It’s both adorable and gross. We should go swim.”Sarah snickered a little as she headed for the door, pausing in their rooms long enough to change into her bikini before heading down to the pool wit him.
 
both boys chuckled at Tony's spluttering and huffing. "you are our universe." Steve purred with a smile. "we got you two presents." Steve admitted with a smirk. "why don't you go upstairs, strip naked and crawl into bed and we'll get your presents ready?" he offered with a grin.

he chuckled. "very gross." he agreed. "especially when i know what his present is. i'm scarred for life you know." he admitted with a smile as he followed her, dressing up in his own Iron Man swimming trunks just to annoy her.
 
“...I don’t know what to say to that.”Tony muttered twitching a little looking up at them, caught between blushing like a schoolgirl, and wanting to enjoy the thought of being the world to them. “...kay. I can do that.”Tony muttered looking thoughtful as he pulled away and headed upstairs. Stripping down and laying out in bed, twitchy and nervous, wondering what they were getting him.

“...I think I don’t want to know. Don’t tell me.”She snickered a little shaking he rhead, twitching a little when she saw the shorts. “You better hope Fitz doesn’t see you in those, otherwise you might get stripped naked when he steals them.”She teased.
 
they both grinned. "don't say anything, just accept it, love it, embrace it." James suggested. "Tony!? are you naked?" Steve demanded ten minutes later. once they where sure they walked in, looking very smug. both of them. James smirked as he walked in first. pausing to pose as Steve Came in behind him, posing as well. "we've come to... lay down the law." James purred, Steve groaning. "dammit James you said you weren't going to use that line!" "but i like it! and Tony thinks it's funny! don't you Tony?!"

he smirked. "you'd love it if he stripped me naked." he teased with a chuckle and a shake of his head as he leaped into the water with a whoop and a laugh. "come on Slowpoke!" he ordered with a grin.
 
“I am I am!Just get in here.”Tony said sounding aroused and anxious, wanting to know what was happening before pausing, stsaring at the two as he leaned back on his elbows. “...That was so so cheesy.”Tony said biting his lip to keep from laughing at james’ corny delight in being cheesy. “I’d go more for we’re here to arrest you, mr. Stark or something that gets those handcuffs on me, but if you have to lay down the law...”Tony snickered.

“Hm, I would, but you’d never hear the end of it, and tony’ll love that you have iron man trunks.”She snickered laughing as she waited for him to come up, grinning as she jumped in, splashing him. “I’m not slow!Just planning my plan of attack.”She snickered
 
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