Keiran was younger in this memory. Although his face betrayed no sign of anger or discomfort at what was being told to him, his mind clearly said differently. It had started as being separated from others his age by staying home with a tutor in order to keep him focused and away from 'bad influences'. For years he had been looking forward to the transition into a public school, and he had done well enough with a tutor through his youth that his parents had agreed to let him go if he continued to keep this work up, but then they had second thoughts. They wanted him to wait until college or university. How unbelievable! They had already been planning his future behind his back, but he knew it. They had a full military career ahead of him, and yet they swore that he would be educated and given his choice of work. It had been enough of a struggle just to convince them to give him enough respect to let him have his illusion of control, so it wasn't as if he would risk losing even that to argue that he had earned a little while in a regular school. No. That had been an ongoing struggle. A realization that he had no real choices in his life. Then he had met that girl, and all of this had brought everything to a new level.
Images flashed by of the repeated rejections Keiran had suffered at the hands of his parents, being steered farther and farther toward what they had wanted. Intertwined with them were brief glimpses of a girl around Keiran's age with fair skin and long black hair and a brilliant smile. Every picture came with attached sentiments and impulses which were immediately transferred to the man viewing them. This memory was strong.
Keiran had started seeing her casually, and eventually as years passed it had become more serious... more romantic. Unfortunately, he had been caught with her before things had gotten very far. Everything slowed down for this particular scene, and instead of flashes, the scenario became more like a video. Clear as distilled water and drenched in the same flood of tension and frustration that had tainted the rest of this memory.
"Keiran... who is this?" A well-built, tall man stood before Keiran, an intense anger radiating from him.
Keiran hesitated, stepping in front of the girl as if to shield her from his father's reaction. "Sir.. this is Shay. ...She's a friend."
"Friend? I've never met the girl. You were supposed to be out on an errand for school tonight, weren't you?" It wasn't an accusation. Not right out. But Keiran couls sense the subtle subtext. You've been lying to me, the man had said.
"Well, I just thought-" Keiran tried to come up with something plausible to excuse his behaviour, but he hadn't exactly had much practice lying impromptu. His father caught on easily.
"Keiran, there is no excuse for abandoning your responsibilities. School comes first."
"But I didn't really-" Keiran began to cough up the truth, that he had not been doing anything for school. This had been something he'd done with his free time.
"-She's obviously a bad influence. I don't want to see you with her again, do you hear?" The man interrupted, and when Keiran only responded with defiant silence, the man repeated himself more loudly, "SON, I said do you HEAR ME?"
"Yes, sir!" Keiran answered, furious and hurt, but too stubborn to show it. His face and eyes became blank. Something that always happened when his father refused to let him have something he truly wanted.
The words Jospeh had overheard outside began to play again. This time, what they had meant became more clear as the memory faded back to images... images of Keiran leaving his family. Being with Shay.. they were not memories. They were plans. Plans that, clearly, were either not lived out, or not managed for long.