Patreon LogoYour support makes Blue Moon possible (Patreon)

Welcome to Atlantis Academy! (Lia && Chokuro)

Rune blinked a few times and instantly fell to his knees, tears actually passing his eyes. The folder fell from his hands, pictures of houses and everything else scattering across the floor as he hit the ground. "IM SORRY!" He yelled, looking up at the other and his eyes still had the tears. "I'm so sorry, Calder! And I know sorry isn't good enoguh It never will be! I fucked up. I stomped over your heart and for the stupidest reason! I... I love YOU calder. I love Relic, but .. YOU are my soul mate! He ... He is not important enough to lose you. And I know that i will see him. We're not cutting him out but ... but I just freaked out and I'm so used to people telling me it's wrong to be with him that I blacked out and assumed, yes even after this much time. that you were like that! That you thought it was unnatural and wanted to break us apart! IM SO SORRY! I ... I don't have an excuse! I just... I was stupid. Beyond stupid. and I'm so so so sorry."
 
He listened, truly listened (and closed the door to keep prying ears shut out). The blond didn't say anything for a few minutes before speaking. "That doesn't even make sense, Rune. After everything-our past, especially after we had both shared a bed with Relic, after agreeing...suggesting that we all buy a house together... Why would you distrust me so deeply?" That part hurt worse than the cheating, really. "Centuries, Rune. Centuries we've been together, and never once have I asked you to be anything other than who you are in every part of our lives. And...and that's your reasoning? That you thought that after all that time, I'd changed so drastically over night?" he asked, trying very had to keep his own voice strong.
 
"NO nooo!" He whimpered and lifted his head, fingers pushing through his hair, looking up at him and still having tears in his eyes. "It's not my reasoning! It was a gut reaction. It just... you've never done that to me before! I ... I could only react that way. Well, not only! Had I thought and not been an ass, it would have ended better but um... That... that's all I have, Calder. I know there's nothing in our past that should have made me doubt you, but I freaked out! I just ... you wanted me to move away and that's not that bad! It isn't I see that now! I just... oh gods Calder. I hate myself right now. I hate myself so much."
 
He sighed, trying to put his thoughts into words. "We... We're not a normal couple, Rune. I trust that this was a one time mistake and it won't happen again. But... I can't trust that we won't fight over something so stupid again; that you won't trust my intentions if I ever ask to talk about something like this again." Calder sat on the floor, though a good distance away from his husband. "And then what?" he asked, looking at Rune. "What happens if I get past this, and we move, and Relic follows-because he inevitably will-and in another century I ask to move again, to Brazil, to South Africa...to anywhere? This... I can't do it again, even without the cheating, I can't do it again."
 
"OHOH! I found a nice one in Greece!" He chimed, scurrying past the other to the papers on the ground and flipping through them for a while. He then found a gorgeous beach-side mansion with plenty of room and everything else that he handed to the other with a smile. "Not Brazil, but um... I was staying within the European Union. We could do Brazil if you want. Nothing cold. I refuse to move to live with polar bears or moose." He said simply and then sat down with a soft sigh. "I won't do this again, Calder. This feeling that I have right now. This disgusted, self-hating feeling? I hate it. I ... I don't ever want to feel it To have this happen again. I just... It's scarred on me and it won't go away..."
 
Calder was just noticing the papers, and he raised an eyebrow. "For your own safety, I'd just not bring that up at the moment," he commented, looking away. He drew in a few deep breaths before looking back at Rune. "That doesn't fix it, Rune. I... It doesn't fix that you thought such horrible things about me." It was the one thing that was the hardest for Calder to get past. "I just... I can't understand what I did to make you think those things about me."
 
Rune tilted his head. "This is probably going to make it worse, but you didn't do anything. It... It really was not you. Your words ... it just triggered me. It triggered my insecurities. That's all. I don't think bad things about you. I could never, l-- Calder. I. I freaked out. I jumped to conclusions. And I fucked up. It's nothing you did! And i think this made it worse." he thought for a while, tapping his forefinger against his bottom lip while he tried to think about what could make this potentially a little bit better. "Calder... can you at least know that I will never cheat on you again? I just... Right now, that's what I want to know."
 
He was right, it didn't really help, because that meant that Calder didn't know if he'd trigger those same insecurities again in the future. "I know that," he answered softly. "I do. I just... I'm just hurt, Rune. Hurt that you ran out and drank instead of talking to me, hurt that you got so drunk that you had no idea who you were sleeping with, hurt that... that you still had those insecurities after so long." He sighed a little, not really sure what else he could say that he hadn't said already. "I don't know what else to say..."
 
Rune sighed softly, falling to the side and he rolled over onto his stomach, butt in the air and nuzzling into the floor with a sigh. "Me either..." he looked over at him, biting his bottom lip a bit more. "And me saying it won't happen again means nothing, I'm sure." He sighed and flopped to the side, rear end hitting the ground and he closed his eyes while he tried to think. "I... I just want this... over. I don't like not seeing you. Not hearing you. Not feeling you. . . Everything. I just miss everything about you."
 
"I'd leave, Rune," he whispered, hardly looking at the other. "I... I can't do this again. I love you so much, but it would kill me to go through this again." It wasn't a threat, the blond simply wanted to be sure that his husband was aware of the consequences. He thought for a few minutes, resting his cheek on his knees that he'd pulled to his chest. "Just... I'll be home. Tonight, tomorrow... I just need a little more time to wrap my head around it all."
 
Rune stared at the other and stood up with a simple nod. "Okay." He whispered, stepping out of the room and closing the door behind him. He then fell to his knees, face buried into his knees where he sobbed into the jeans he wore. Shoulders shaking with the tears that passed. He was so exhausted. Mentally and physically. He wound up crying himself to sleep. Curled up in front of the other's door, eventually falling to the side and sleeping in the fetal position.
 
Tanner made his way through the school, to Calder's temporary home. He nearly tripped over Rune, not expecting him to be there, but gave him a little kick to the rear to wake him up. "Get up, you look pathetic." The blond stood over his brother-in-law, arms crossed over his chest. "Worse than pathetic, really. Why are you here?" If he'd hurt Calder again, Tanner wouldn't hesitate to give Rune a hard right hook.
 
Rune groaned with the kick. Slowly pushing himself up and mumbling a few curses. "Shut up." he grumbled, standing and walking past him. "I talked. I hate myself more." he summed up simply while walking through the halls, not even caring anymore. He stumbled to his office and fell into the little couch that was there. He pulled the blanket off the back and coccooned himself, not wanting to get out for anything any time soon. He felt worse than he had before talking to him. There was nothing he could do to change or help this. He was ... He was so stupid.
 
Tanner entered the room and looked at Calder, assessing the damage done. "Well?" he asked, sitting next to his friend as he told him the conversation. The blond shook his head. "You love him, right?" Calder raised an eyebrow but nodded. "And you trust him?" He hesitated a little this time, but nodded again. "Then? What's the problem?"

Sighing, Calder organized his thoughts before speaking. "What if it happens again? Not the cheating-I don't fear that happening again. But the shutting down and running away and getting angry... He's never done that before. What if I want to move again in the future? I... That's what hurt so bad, Tanner." He rested his head on his friend's shoulder.

"But you can't plan around 'what ifs'." He looked down at the other and stroked his fingers through his hair. "You warned him, right? And you told him how it made you feel... The ball is in his court, Calder. And, other than this once, when have you known Rune to drop the ball?" Calder looked up and scowled at Tanner being right. "Just go to him." It took a few minutes, but Calder finally nodded. The blond stood, glad that it was late and there wouldn't be anyone roaming the school, and moved through the hallways to his husband's office, instinct telling him he was there. Slipping inside, Calder saw Rune instantly and shook his head. He stood over the lump form of his lover and prodded him in the shoulder a bit hard.
 
Rune hissed. "Tanner I swear to the gods I will snap that--" he perked up, seeing Calder and instantly sitting up and looking alert. Eyes wide as he kept his eyes to the other. "Hi! Um. Sit? er. tea? no I don't have tea. Ignore that um..." He looked around, trying to think of something that he could do or give to him. He felt horrible still and he did not know what to do. He just wanted to make the other feel better and to not hate him and to not be too awkward. He did not know what he was going to do!
 
"Just shut up," he answered with no bite in his voice. Calder took Rune's hand and lead him back to his now empty room. He didn't want to talk-they'd talked more than enough to last him a life time. Right now, he just wanted to feel like everything was okay again (even if it still wasn't completely). Stopping by the bed, he reached out and began to slowly undress his lover, leaving him in his boxers, and then did the same for himself before climbing into the bed, waiting for Rune to follow him.
 
Rune was lost. Happy, but lost. He walked with the other to the bed and looked at his clothes before lifting his eyes to the other. He crawled into the bed beside him and scooted closer to the man. Arms wrapping around his and his head pressed into the crook of his neck. "I love you, Calder." He murmured and then nuzzled him some more. "And Nikkos gave Honey my car keys to go joy riding with. I'm going to smack that prat." he mumbled, just needing to whine a little bit. Now that his mind was a little more clear. Being with Calder really did help him to think.
 
He sighed as he curled into Rune's chest, face pressed into the man's neck and arms wrapped around his waist. "Serves you right." The blond didn't respond past that, he was too emotionally drained to spar with Rune, or to think past small words. He wanted to sleep, and hopefully let his husband's presence begin to heal him further. Calder yawned and settled in, drifting off to sleep quickly. He couldn't promise that he'd be home the next day, but this was a start at least and he knew that he'd be home before the week's end.
 
Rune sighed and buried his face into his head. Holding him some more while he began to sink into the mattress and fall asleep with his lover in his arms. He felt so much better already. He had missed him. He missed feeling him, holding him, smelling him. Everything. He knew that he would never do this again. Never again. He did not like this feeling. He never wanted to have it again. He wanted to have his husband with him forever and ever and he would move anywhere with him. He would more to Texas if he wanted! Oh he did not care anymore. He just wanted to stay with him.
 
He finally did move home, and the first few days had been a little tense, but slowly Calder was beginning to feel like himself again. The blond spotted his husband and smiled, sliding into the room and hopping up onto the counter next to him. "So I've changed my mind," he said casually, swinging his legs. "I don't want to move to Ireland anymore. I think I want to move to Alaska." He nodded and waited for an answer from the other man.
 
Rune froze, his eyes going wide and a soft cry escaped his lips before he laughed and forced a grin. "Kay um... I can live with... some moose." He bit his lip, pulling the flesh into his mouth beore looking up at him. "Y... You're sure you don't want something like um... California?' he grinned, hoping that he would not mind somewhere warmer. "Or even Washington state?"
 
"Nope. Alaska." He nodded, leaning over and pecking a kiss to Rune's cheek before hopping off of the counter. "We'll go up and look for houses when the sun will be up there." The blond smiled at his lover and moved out of the room to finish some work in his office. Oh, he was going to make Rune pay dearly for the past six weeks.
 
Rune let out a soft cry and fell over, onto the ground, whimpering softly and closing his eyes as he tried to think about the pluses of living in Alaska. Moose. They were neat. It was secluded. That could make it worthwhile. He then perked up and rushed off into the other room, skidding to a stop in the doorway of his husband's office. "Can we at least get one of those cool houses that are in the woods with a pond? Or lake or whatever?" He bounced on the balls of his feet a few times. "And we can buy a boat."
 
Looking up, Calder smiled at the man. "Well we'll need a snowmobile more, won't we? The roads are covered in six inches of snow and ice for three quarters of the year... I don't suppose the cars will do us any good up there, either... Just think of the structure damage all that moisture will do..." The blond shrugged a little. "But if you want a boat to use for when we can, of course... Oh I'll have to ask Relic to start on a warm winter wardrobe for us, too..."
 
He stared at the other, his mouth moving up and down a few times before he gave that strained grin once more. "O-of course..." he whimpered and turned to go into the other room, collapsing onto the couch and trying to think of something that would make this less horrible. He could not have his cars. He would probably have to get some jeep or something. That would not be all THAT bad, though. he liked Jeeps! He whimpered and rolled onto his side to nuzzle into the back cushions, whimpering some more.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom