Just one more response to MBF:
Yeah, you feel directionless, at a loss as to what to do in your existence. It's actually normal in the early years of adulthood. What you might not realize yet (some do, some don't), is that every damn body feels like that. Their whole lives. That's because we don't have built-in purposes. Nobody's getting us ready for existence and stamping us with "COMPOSER" or "GARBAGEMAN" or "PHYSICIST" or "GAY PORN STAR" as we go down the conveyor belt.
The thing about purpose in this world is that you basically have to create it for yourself. Some people have a particular talent and they are driven to pursue a dream. I was reading an interview with Colleen Coover about doing comics and she goes "you don't wait to break into the industry, you break into comics by doing fucking comics. Even if nobody's paying you." I'm paraphrasing, I think, but the point is, she had a thing she wanted to do, and she ran with it, and now she's drawing comics professionally and she's really great.
My point is, you want a direction, you want a purpose, you essentially have to create one for yourself. If you're anything like me, your interests are either not particularly viable (I love movies, I'm a good writer, but it's harder to become a screenwriter than it is to win a state lottery) or illegal (I was once a very good lover, but you can't really pursue that as a career option). Everything else was perhaps interesting, but I didn't have a passion for it, so I ended up with option paralysis. Perhaps that's where you are.
If you have something you really like, pursue it. Start devoting yourself to it. Make something, perform something, ask around about how you can do something for the public. Just start doing it, and see if you can make it pay off. If not, you'll at least be doing it. If you can't decide on something to pursue, start exploring and seeing what chimes with you.
You want a purpose to your life, it doesn't just happen. You want your existence to have a point, you better start sharpening yourself as soon as you can, son. Get an early start, and maybe you won't be like me, entering middle age with very little of note to show for it. Oh, I have personal successes, but how does "making it home in record time" match up against existence? Not very well, I'll tell you that.
It's up to you. Make it awesome.
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