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Accidental Bonds(ryax/lady)

Lucifer was startled by Thorne's little hug, he didn't move, letting it happen. In truth, he was grateful yet afraid of her touch. He didn't know how to react, didn't know how to react to it now with what he had done. Why did she hug him? He didn't deserve it is what he thought, confusion swirling in his mind. Following, her words were messing with his mind. This he couldn't have heard the wrong way, not after she even said it twice. Did she really not want to leave him? he wondered. Oh poor Lucifer, so confused even though the answer had already been said and proven for many times by now.

His eyes lit up, a hopeful expression upon them and his face at her words, turning his head to face her yet again. He couldn't help but to dig for slivers of hope at the very least, even if she had told him plainly that she didn't want to leave. "A.. Are you sure?", he asked her, though not giving her room to answer before he continued, "I promise, if you stay, I'll give you breakfast in bed each day. I'll get you anything that you could ever want. I'll never bother you again, I'll only be with you when you want me too! I'll never lay a single bad hand against you EVER again..! I.. I shouldn't have done it in the first place but.. I.. I'm so fucking sorry... I can't believe what I've done..", he said with an increasingly sad tone, dropping down on his knees again right in front of her. His entire body was sulking, moping even as he faced the floor, not worthy of looking at Thorne anymore, instead he was glaring sadly at his own palms. Putting his palms on his knees he took a soft breath before he voiced his thoughts, "I.. I would like that.. ..I would like it if you stayed.".

Oh poor Lucifer and Thorne, so torn situated on the opposite sides of the rapture separating their hearts. Lucifer knew, knew that it would take a long, long time before he could be trusted by her again. He had hurt her so badly there was really nothing he could do to make it up, but maybe in time, it would get easier to cope with it for both him and her. He raised his back a bit, still on his knees, looking up at her once more. She was adorable when dressed in his clothes, they were clearly too big for her, still she insisted on wearing them. This made it all so much more painful, how could he have ever hurt such a sweet creature like her. That's right, Lucifer would be likely to never, ever forgive himself for what he had done. He passed a deep sigh, "You're amazing, you know that? I almost can't believe that you actually want to stay with me after... after..", he said softly before pausing, sighing again and sporting another sad face as he faced the floor again. Oh poor Lucifer was hurting, hurting so very, very much.
 
Thorne nodded a little at his words, biting her lip as she looked around the room. “I am. I don’t want to go anywhere.”she muttered avoiding looking at him, looking so very confused at the want. More then anything, she didn’t know what to do. Giggling a little she tried to be calm. “Breakfast would be nice. I’m kinda hungry.”She muttered watching him, startled as he dropped to his knees, trembling a little even as she struggled to not move back from him. Looking at him kneeling there she raised a hand, gently touching his hair, pausing to make sure he wouldn’t move away before sliding her fingers through the soft strands.

Stepping back as he looked up at her she smiled a little, though it looked nervous, like she wasn’t sure what to expect, but willing to try. “I know. My father would tell you its his influence that makes me amazing, but I’m pretty sure its mother’s.”She said trying to lighten the moment as she let her hand dropped, looking at a loss for what to do next.

“What are you two doing in here?You look like I killed your puppy.”Wrath said frowning as he swung into the room, pausing as he studied the two. Resting his shoulder against the doorjab as he tried to figure out what was happening. “Nothing. Just talking.”Thorne said smiling a little at Wrath, knowing better then to tell him. She didn’t trust her grandfather to not try killing his best friend if he was told what had happened between them. It hadn’t been physically harming, but the emotional damage would be devastating as they worked on being together still.
 
Lucifer was glad to hear Thorne's words, an echo of her mind that so very lightly eased his worries, not nearly enough however. Much to his surprise, yet again, she still wanted to touch him and dared to be close to him. The feeling of her fingers running through his hair was like the greatest of blessings. It was like being touched by a goddess, a blessing, from a greater being, it showered him with love, confidence, hope that they would indeed still be together. It still struck him just as hard when she stepped back as he looked up at her, but he understood her concern and fear and wouldn't hold it against her, after all he was a monster by all means.

Luc smiled faintly as he looked up at her, her light joke was very appreciated in this situation. "Oh it's definitely not from your father. There is just no way.", he replied with an insecure softness to his voice. The moment Wrath revealed his presence, Lucifer's insides all screamed 'I'm going to die.', but was quickly erased by hope as Thorne didn't reveal anything. Smiling at Wrath he replied quite simply and with softness in his voice trying to 'convince' Wrath that it was fine, "I'm just groveling a bit for my soon-to-be wife, gotta stay on her good side you know.", he said, his sentence was stupid but the situations and feelings left him an idiot in front of anyone but her.

He stood up slowly as to not startle or scare Thorne. He tried looking into her eyes, sighing lightly. "How about I get you that breakfast I promised?", he said softly, a weak smile forming on his lips. "Your wish is my law, what do you want me to make you?", he asked her softly, awaiting her order. Luc would basically be Thorne's servant now, for a long, long time in order to try to even begin to repair the damage.
 
Thorne smiled a little as he looked startled at her touching him. While she had wanted to touch his hair, she was only able to do it in short bursts, because it took all her courage to do it. “I will ask grandfather, get his opinion.”She muttered looking amused at the demon lord leaning in the doorway. “Definitely not your father. He’s still sulking over getting his ass kicked.”Wrath said looking amused before looking between them, looking vaguely concerned as he realized they were both hiding something. He might not be the most emotionally brilliant person in the world, but he knew these two, there was something wrong, but he was willing to let them hide it if they wanted to. At least for a bit.

“Ah, well you did abandon her to go whale hunting.”Wrath snorted laughing, studying the careful way Lucifer stood. What the hell happened?He thought to himself, curious but the tight feeling in his stomach said he might not want to know.

Thorne smiled softly, looking slightly relieved as he realized that he couldn’t move to quickly. Nodding slightly she stepped back from him.”Breakfast sounds good. How about you and grandfather go get me breakfast and I’ll go rest. Surprise me, I’m just hungry, just make something good.”She bit her lip, looking up at him.”And bring me a book to read.”She said smiling a little as she looked up at him, but unlike even the night before she didn’t lean up to kiss him before walking out of the room.

Wrath turned his head watching her go before looking at Lucifer, raising his eyebrows as they headed for the kitchen. “I’m not even going to ask what you did. I don’t want to know, because I have a feeling I’ll want to kill you, and I really don’t want to do that.”Wrath said, putting the other at ease, at least hopefully. Because it was true, even if the demon lord remembered that Lucifer was not only his best friend, but was his king, if he knew what Lucifer had done there would be no control to the rage that would drive him to pummel Lucifer. And even if he was curious about what Lucifer and thorne had settled on for the book she'd been reading, he didn't want to ask, not when both of them looked so very fragile, which wasn't a word he used often when thinking about Lucifer.
 
Wrath's comment was perfect to get a good chuckle out of Lucifer, but for the moment he could not muster one, he could only reveal a smirk as he covered up his insecurity. His following comment had no effect on him what so ever, he was dedicated and focused to Thorne's breakfast deal. Listening intently to her words, he nodded and was just about to scurry away when she added her second request, making him think about more then just breakfast. "I'll bring you several.", he replied softly, his voice thankful for her wishes. While he missed the kiss from her lips as she left, he didn't deem himself worthy of it. He couldn't feel much more worse about the situation even, that non kiss moment just showed him more clearly his terrible action.

As Thorne left their vicinity, Lucifer turned and began walking towards the kitchen in a quick manner, not keen on chatting with Wrath for the moment, focusing on his own tasks given to him by his broken lover. When Wrath quickly managed to catch up and talk to him anyway, Lucifer didn't give him an answer, just silence and yet another sad, mortified expression to show for it. It didn't put him at ease, not by a long shot, it was like every fiber in his body wanted Wrath to know what he had done, but at the same time he would do anything for him to not find out. So confused. Wrath had every right to kill him for what he had done, there was no doubt in his mind, but he really didn't want to die just yet, not before he could make Thorne regain her trust and love so she wouldn't fear future spouses like she feared him now and become a stronger woman, so telling him was little of an option at this point. But eventually Wrath would get to know what had happened, it was inevitable.

Scurrying around in his kitchen, he gathered and prepared various small things for her. A small bowl of surface food with strawberry flavored yoghurt and some hazelnut and cinnamon flavored cereal with sides of fresh cut slices of bananas. Innately cold and crunchy Bloodflowers plucked from his own personal garden of rare ingredients. Demonwheat bread that was warm by touch, spreading some surface butter on top which melted quickly and perfectly. Quickly frying up some bacon he had gotten as a gift from the scrumptious stores of Gluttony after Thorne had helped deal with his before crisis. Of course he picked cutlery of finest quality for her to dine with. Before heading back, he made his way to the library with the plate of breakfast in one hand, picking a few carefully selected books out for her to perhaps enjoy. Lucifer didn't know what she had already read, so he picked out two surface classics, Oliver Twist and Moby Dick, picking out some Thor comics and The Nightingales floor. "Think she'll like this?", he asked his friend lightly as he eyed his choice and considered his answer before he began heading back to finish the quest, scurrying the rooms until he finally found her.
 
Wrath looked bemused as he watched lucifer cook, as much as he didn't want to know what was going on, just the way lucifer was acting meant that he probably should,if only to deal sith whatever emotional trauma there was. Smiling slightly as he nodded,"I'm sure she will."wrath said as he walked with him, but stopping at the door to thorne's rooms."I'll talk to you later."he muttered excusing himself because while thorne had made it clear he was welcome where ever she was, he knew thzt lucifer had given her these rooms just so she could have a place of her own, a quiet sanctuary if she needed it, and he didn't want to disturb whatever peace she needed for the time being.

Thorne stirred as lucifer entered the room, having been dozing as she waited fod him, she gave him a sleepy smile that said more then anything that she still needed to rest, that her body was still punishing her for the torture of being denied so many times. "What did you bring?"she said nodding towards the books as she took the tray of food from him,raising up her legs so she could balance her plate on them while she ate. Looking over the books after he told her she smiled."oliver twist."she said biting her lip a little before looking at the chair near the wall."..if...if you want to pull that over here,you could stay and read to me as I ate."she said,not kedn on him just sitting there hovering over her,but ic he was doing something for her, it didn't make her feel quite as anxious to have him in the room.
 
He wasn't particularly at ease with Wrath's reply, even though Luc had asked, he couldn't feel more indifferent about it until he had heard Thorne's words for himself. "We will indeed.", Lucifer added before Wrath made his disappearance act right by Thorne's quarters. Entering her room, carefully and gently at that as in an attempt to not startle her. Handing the plate of breakfast for her, he backed away again so she wouldn't possibly feel threatened by his close presence at the moment. "I didn't know what you like to read.. so I brought a bit of everything. Some human classics and comics. Oliver Twist, Moby Dick, Over The Nightingales Floor and some Thor comics.", he replied softly.

"Are you sure?", he asked, hesitating for a moment before he hurried over to the chair yet in a predictable and soft manner as to not use dangerous movements. Carrying the chair over, he put it down again on a brief distance from the bed so he wouldn't be too close, so that she would feel safer. He sat in parallel to the bed, looking down towards the feet part of it so that he wouldn't be facing her in order for it to be more soothing for her. He gave her a weak, remorseful smile as he took the older copy of Oliver Twist and opened it up, making sure both of them were comfortable and ready before he would begin.

"Among other public buildings in a certain town, which for many reasons it will be prudent to refrain from mentioning, and to which I will assign no fictitious name, there is one anciently common to most towns, great or small: .....", he began at the very start, reading softly with a story tellers voice, lilt and playful in order to inspire the listener or reader. It was nice that she allowed him to do this still, while he was mortified in sadness over his actions, it was a weak comfort that he was allowed to do this still.
 
"I am. I want to eat and you can do the reading for me. Zince you want a task."she teased a little as she settled in to listen, sighing softly as she listened to him. Because it was so amusing to hear him reading,and while it was hard to be with him, being in the quiet room with him was nice. Relaxing.

A few days later belial studied her friend as she perched on the edge of his desk. While her and lucifer had a prickly relationship at times, she considered him a friend. Which was why she'd finally given into wratb's prodding o talk to thorne. While wrath was carefully keeping himself from knowing what had happened, the demon lord had also wanted to make sure his granddaughter was okay. So she'd checked on thorne. And what she had found was painful, and there was nothing she could do, except maybe force lucifer to go confront her, because thorne was avoiding it.

"You need to go speak to your fiancee."the female demon lord said, not bothering with small talk, and getting to what she wantrd to talk about. You could say a lot of things about belial, but that she was shy about talking wasn't one of them. She knew she was breaking her promise to thorne, but Lucifer had a right to know what was wrong, and even if it left her young friend angry with her, she knew thorne needed the emotional support, even if she refused to tell Lucifer herself. So. Belial was doing what any good friend would, and telling Lucifer....even if she knew she had no business butting in on their personal problem,because this was something so painful she had no idea what to do with it, but the almost rape was second place to what help thorne needed now.
 
A soft smile revealed on Lucifers lips at Thorne's playfully demanding reply. It was nice for him to feel that she could still trust in him in a way, whatever small way it was and no matte rhow many times, it was still appreciated as a divine blessing from a goddess.

Days later, he found himself situated behind his desk, Belial confronting him about talking to Thorne about something he had no idea what it could be about. While he had much been her faithful servant for the past few days, he could see nothing that was wrong, perhaps due to his strong desire, remorse and guilt for what he had done still imprinted on his own heart.

Lucifer had gotten quite used with having Belial around now that she was Wrath's companion, he had gotten used to her brisk ways of handling conversations and her strong personality. "I do, you say? About what?", he asked her, obviously curious to know what she was talking about, as he hadn't noticed anything off the radar personally. But who could blame the poor soul. He was also ignoring the possibility that Belial had a high chance of knowing what had happened between Thorne and Lucifer, he didn't want anyone else to know, anyone else to know the irreparable damage he himself had caused that he was beating himself up and hating himself so very much for.
 
Belial studied the demon lord sitting in front of her, looking vaguely amused that he was pretending that nothing was wrong. Well...maybe he was so blind by his guilt and thorne's hiding what was wrong became that much easier if he wanted to not know. Staring down at her nails as she made zure her nail polish wasn't scuffed she sighed."I know what happened....wrath was worried, and equally sure he didn't want to know. So I went amd talked to her.but that's not the main reason I'm here. You need to go see her."she sighed finally looking up at him, deciding to have some mercy on them all. Cause she knew lucifer would need a chance to recover, before he went to comfort a scared, young female.

"She was pregnant luc. She miscarried this morning."belial's eyes were kind and sad, which just said how much she'd come to like the young demoness who was trying to hide her condition from lucifer."whether it was because the babe formed wrong,or because of what happened, I don't know, but she needs you."she said quietly because she knew he was going to feel guilty, but thorns needed more then his guilt, she needed taken care of by someone who loved her and she needed to know her and lucifer could get through this together. thorne loved him atill, and more then anything else, belial knew thr youngling wanted to be with him still, which meant no hiding secrets this big from hi
 
Lucifer's stare grew cold as Belial noted that she knew what had happened between him and Thorne. His ignorance had kept him guarded but he was finally faced with the truth that of course it wasn't going to stay only between them. A sigh of dismay, but also of a final relief slipped past his lips as he listened to her. She had more to say then just that? That can't be good... Lucifer thought to himself as he stared the woman down.

If Lucifer would have been drinking anything at the moment, the contents would have been spit and blasted out across the room as his entire body shifted on the inside by Belial's horrifying news. His face grew pale, his eyes sad, confused, cold. Lucifer had no idea, none what so ever that Thorne was even remotely pregnant in any form of way. The next thoughts were devastating to his psyche as well, of course he would feel guilty about it, he couldn't do much else then to blame himself for the chain of event that had happened. More then guilt and remorse, he felt a simple and powerful sadness. He didn't know about it, she didn't want to tell him, and it was highly likely it was because of the incident at that. They had just lost their baby just hit him, and a tight, squiggling, painful and unnerving knot formed in his chest.

He stood himself up calmly, "Excuse me.", he said lightly, making his way calmly to his bathroom, locking the door properly behind him, taking a moment to breath before he heaved the contents of his breakfast into the toilet. After a moment of continuous vomiting and then cleaning himself up, another short breather, he unlocked the bathroom again calmly and walked towards Belial, walking past her and out of the room, heading towards Thorne's location which he hoped were in her bedchambers. As he passed Belial, he muttered something to her, "I'll be at Thorne's, have Wrath cover for me for a while.", he asked her demanding in his statement.

As he arrived, a short moment of breath and nerves he obtained, entering his lover's chambers once more. He didn't ask for permission, didn't care about privacy as that point was already lost. "I'm going to tell you a story today, a story about something grand, forgotten and missed.", he said with a soft, demanding voice as he made his way over to her, Sweeping her off her feet and picking her up in his arms, moving them to the bed. He situated them softly, firmly, so that he was leaning back against the bedpost, she was between his legs, leaning back against his chest. He had his arms tenderly around her waist, on her stomach, afraid to hurt her fragile body. "Once upon a time, there was a boy, an angel boy of the age of six. Growing up in the Garden of Eden, he and his family were, the boy was always....", he began softly with the voice of a story teller once more. And so it was that Lucifer shared his entire life story with Thorne, that she would be the only person to ever have it told to by him personally. During the telling it was hinted several times that it was a story about himself, she would even be able to figure it out since she had read the book about him, only at the end was it revealed as a fact however that it was himself that he was talking about, with the falling from heaven and all. He had told her everything, about God, about his twin brother Michael, his parents, his life, what Heaven was like, how he joined the heavenly army and came to be the leader of the angels, everything in his life he shared with her. Of course it was quite a long story, definitely a long one, but he hoped that she would enjoy the time away from the moment to listen to it.
 
Thorne was startled to see the man, pausing as she stared at him. Looking nervous, before sighing softly as he just picked her up. Shifting to get comfortable as the man held her. Resting her head on his shoulder as he held her, content to be with him and distracted from how much her body hurt. And amazed that he was even telling her. As the hours past and she grew sleepy she dozed,lulled into peace at the sound of his voice, "thank you...I just wanted to knoe you better..."she muttered though she'd probably freak out when she woke, for the moment she was hurting to badly to not want held.

"You okay?"wrath said from the doorway,his voice soft and quiet,not want to startle either of them and knowing thorne needed to sleep.even if belial didn't tell him everything, he had still needed to come and make sure she was okay and along with making sure lucifer was okay to.
 
Lucifer felt free, free because he told his deep past that had haunted him for so, so many years. Deep inside it was like a lock released and he was content with himself for once. He was happy that she knew, that he had no more secrets for her, significant secrets at that. He was bound to have some secrets left, things he had forgotten, things he had in his subconscious, but that would be for another day as the pretty lady Thorne fell asleep in his arms. "Yea..", he replied softly, a happy voice for the first time in more then a week. He would stay like this until she had woken up when he would confront her with the grim secret of her own.

Not taking his eyes from Thorne for a second, gazing upon her in his arms as Wrath spoke to him, he shook his head slowly, "Not even in the very least.", he replied softly, minding of the sleeping beauty he kept it low and quiet. "My friend, Wrath, I've done something... something terrible. If I could, I would do anything possible to make it undone, but I can't and I can't stop hating myself furiously because of it. The worst part is that it seems to just pile on and on afterwards, blow after blow. I can't believe this is happening.", the man said with heartbreaking panic trailing his voice. Lucifer tried to keep himself steady, shaking lightly as he suppressed the tears that were dying to erupt. He didn't want to tell her grandfather what he had done yet, but he would soon, he didn't want anything to kept a secret anymore, in the end it would only hurt everyone he loved much more then if they stayed silent. Wrath had a right to know, nay, needed to know, what Lucifer had done, even if he wanted it or not.
 
Wrath sighed softly as he watched the two, huffing out a breath.”I know.”Wrath sighed softly, staring at his friend.”Belial demanded that I come see you after I finished your work for the next week, even if I am not sure I want to know.”Wrath muttered before moving to sit down on the bed next to him, shifting both thorne and Lucifer a little so that he could wrap his arms around his friend, holding him just as gently as the king of hell was holding thorne. “She said Thorne had been pregnant, and that something happened?Said I needed to talk to you, since you needed someone to talk to.”he muttered huffing a little.

“My lover is blunt, but it does seem that you need to talk, and you better tell me before you lose your mind, and make whatever this is worse. Because if you can’t handle this, you will lose both her, and yourself Luc. And I wont let that happen, if I can help it. So let me help you.”he muttered sounding sure about wanting to help his friend, even if he wasn’t sure he wanted confirmation on what he had guessed had happened. “Would you just cry. You both need to mourn, and she’ll need you composed, when she finally breaks down.”Wrath muttered, prodding his friend a little, knowing he’d refuse to cry if given the choice, and equally knowing that Lucifer needed to let it out before he ended up hating thorne for drawing out such strong emotions.
 
Lucifer grinned on the inside at his friend being demanded by his lover anything, it was fun to watch him get ordered around like that. "Yea..", he agreed sadly before he shifted both himself and Thorne carefully as to not wake her up, but enough to let Wrath join them. It was a bit unexpected, but also of great comfort for him that his best friend hugged him like that, comforting him on his great loss. "Yea..", he replied again, at loss for words on what to say for the moment. It's not an easy thing to talk about, loosing a child like that, not even an easy thing to talk about what he had done to his best friend's granddaughter. He felt out of place, that he wasn't allowed to be there at the same time as this was the right place for him to be, an inner conflict confusing his deep emotions still until all secrets were out and his acceptance with his close ones would be a fact.

"I can't just cry on demand, silly..", he said softly, leaning his head against his friend's shoulder. But he did anyway, small beads of tears dripping down his cheeks as the emotions and thoughts swirled around his head, the horror being painted and blasted into his mind again and again. His body twitched as he sobbed quietly in his friend's arms, he was straining and trying to keep himself steady and to let the cleansing truth and pain out bit by bit as to not simply throw a tantrum or wake Thorne up. "It's terrible, unforgivable, despicable..!", he began, tears almost streaming down his cheeks as he braced himself for a moments pause before he continued to tell his friend the horrible truth. "I hurt Thorne. I hurt her. Physically, mentally, I hurt her bad Wrath. I couldn't help it, I lost it, I lost myself over what she had been reading. I lost myself over such a fucking trivial thing as my stupid past. I... I just... Fuck! What if I killed our child!? What if it was me that made her miscarry Wrath? What if I killed my own baby!? I can't live with myself if I did. I can't, I just can't. I just want to disappear and die. I thought I would be good for her, but look what I've done, I've destroyed it all, everything. Over what? My trivial fucking past!", he revealed everything, sobbing on as he did he only cried harder, simply wishing for Wrath to just snap his neck right there, god knows that he wouldn't resist it for a second.
 
“I’m not the silly one, idiot.”Wrath muttered sounding vaguely amused at the words as he sighed quietly, pressing a gentle kiss to his friend’s hair as Lucifer leaned into hi,. Looking down at the small woman cradled between their body’s, sleeping so peacefully despite what Lucifer had said he’d done. Choking on the anger, he wanted to lash out, hurt him. But he knew, that he couldn’t. not when it seemed thorne was trusting the man, and wrath knew him, that despite him hurting thorne, he knew he’d never be able to forgive himself if he really hurt Lucifer. Wrath had stood at the man’s side for to many centuries to be comfortable with the idea of causing him harm, even with a good excuse like the harm of his great grandson. Choking on anger he swallowed holding onto his control with only a strand of reason, looking down at Lucifer.

“Your past has always caused you to lash out.”He muttered, sounding casual, but easy because he didn’t know what to say, couldn’t find the words to talk. Swallowing before frowning slightly. “Lucifer, you idiot.”Wrath muttered shaking his head a little. Because he knew he was about to tell him the truth, even if it was going to be painful. “Demons don’t miscarry unless there was something wrong with the babe….”Wrath frowned as he considered the words.”She’s more angel then demon, and you are…well, you. You are different from any demon. She might not be able to carry a child to term, because her body might reject anything angelic, even though you are fallen.”Wrath muttered, because all the demon lords, even Lucien, had had problems having children because their mates were mostly born demons, not fallen angels, which in turn, made carrying a fallen angel’s child difficult. Even fallen, their blood still carried the celestial ichor of angels, and it made things difficult. Lucifer probably hadn’t made things better by hurting her, but he hadn’t made it worse either.

“You didn’t do this. And you will not accept blame for this, because who do you think she’s going to blame for this?Herself. Because she read the book, she made you lash out. She needs to know you aren’t blaming her, or yourself, because you will make this worse.”He growled looking gaunt and pained, because he had no idea how to make Lucifer see the truth, that wallowing in the guilt of what might have caused their miscarriage, would ruin whatever feelings were left between the king of hell and his soon to be bride.

“You will be there for her, Lucifer. She will need you, as much as you need her.”
 
It was nice for Lucifer to actually be able to let his more sensitive emotions roar out, if only for a moment. And even though he exposed all of it, all of the hurt and terrible that had happened, he was thankful that Wrath managed to keep his composure, although he could feel it, he knew that Wrath wanted to hurt him so much. It was nice that he didn't act on his emotions, right now that is, later he could do whatever he wanted, he deserved any punishment his friend could send his way. Lucifer already knew what Wrath told him, but he still couldn't help blaming himself for everything. It was just such a terrible coincidence that it would happen all the same. The words echoing through his mind whether he would be able to father a child or not together with Thorne made him sad, angry, more crying, though he quickly took it as truth and accepted it. He knew it deep inside anyway, so adapting to it was a fact he could do quite quickly. "Yea...", he muttered with a solid breath he could manage to muster between his sulking.

He knew Wrath was telling the truth, Lucifer's sulking eventually died down to sniffling as the words still comforted him, stabilizing his raging mind and emotions well, gathering his broken self back together piece by piece. "I know...", he finally said, his voice soft, sulky and sad as he was though still blaming himself, he wanted to blame himself for this, so that he could try to make up for it in time, but there was really nothing he could do about it at this point, it is as it is, and therefor it was harder to deal with then if it had actually had been his own fault. The know of that he probably can't give Thorne a child was hurting him something fiercely.

"I wont let her.. I won't let her take blame. It's not her fault, it's.. it's never her fault.", he voiced sharply, still stuttering and sniffling, his voice a bit angry. He would never let her take blame, if so he had to take his life in order to prove it to her somehow. She can be mad at him all she wants, but he wouldn't allow it if she was mad at herself, it's just not going to cut it for him. "Yea.. I will.", he replied, his voice softer as he let a sigh slip past his lips.

Lucifer would do all in his power to fix things between him and Thorne, he wasn't about to let everything fall into shadows and shatter, not after finding someone like her to share his life with, after all these lonely years.
 
Wrath smiled a little looking down at the man leaning against his chest, pressing a absent kiss to his hair, a comforting gesture, sighing quietly. “Besides, even if it takes awhile, you two have forever now. You’re both young….well…she is…its not like you’ll have to worry about her dying on you from old age.”he teased a little looking relieved as Lucifer calmed, looking even better as she realized that Lucifer would take care of things. He wouldn’t let thorne blame herself. “Good. Take care of her, and yourself Luc. And get some sleep.”Wrath muttered shifting to get up, letting the two have a quiet moment to themselves, knowing more then anything else, it was what they needed. “I’ll be in your office if you need anything.”he muttered as he left the room.

Hours later Thorne stirred from where she was sleeping on Lucifer’s chest, sighing ever so softly, pressing her cheek against his chest before going still. While she’d gotten used to being around him while she was awake, she hadn’t trusted him to be around when she was asleep since she’d been hurt, not wanting him there when she was vulnerable. While she could tell her head that she trusted him, she hadn’t been able to fall asleep with him there, her body and heart refusing to trust him that much yet. But…shifting her head a little she took a deep breath, relaxing fully against him, no matter what else happened, or what pain her body was in, it felt good to be held. And her body ached, while the miscarriage hadn’t done any physical damage, the sore ache low in her stomach, and the emotional turmoil left her wanted to be held, and not held by anyone else but the man who was currently holding her.

“Lucifer?I thought you had work to do...what are you still doing here?”She muttered, not moving to sit up or anything, just wanting held. Not realizing he knew what was wrong, remembering the story he had told her before she’d past out, she was glad he was there. Glad that he had trusted her with the truth of what happened in heaven, and the fall. Glad that they were starting to rebuild their relationship, and would be stronger for it.
 
A faint chuckle escape Lucifer as Wrath made his funny comment, he was certainly good at managing the situation and making Luc feel better, at least for a moment. 'Mmm', Lucifer replied along with a soft nod as he saw his friend walk out the room. The simple noise was one of confirmation, he would sleep and if he needed anything, he knew where he would find him. Lucifer spent the next few minutes staring at his sweet maiden, before he sighed quietly for himself and closed his eyes, leaning his head backwards onto the bedpost, falling asleep quietly. The hours past was spent sleeping quietly for them both, terribly for Lucifer however, he was dreaming of all the terrible things that happened. He still held her close to him though, not letting her go even while asleep.

Lucifer muttered as he woke up from Thorne's stirring as she woke up, looking down once more on his bride he did it with a curious expression, cautious even, wondering how she would react to the situation while awake and sane. "Welcome back, sleeping beauty. Everything's taken care of, I'm not leaving your side for a while, weather you like it or not.", he replied softly, even a bit playfully, smiling cautiously, anxious to see her reaction to that. "So.. I've told you my secret, do you have any secret I should know about?", he asked her softly, hoping that she would tell him about her their miscarriage. He didn't want to force it out of her by telling her that he knew about it, he wanted her to tell him by free will. It didn't have to happen now, but he would eventually make sure that she said it and acknowledged it, letting her emotions out together with him once more. It was perhaps more then he could ever have hoped for that she would show something else but fear and light joy with him ever again, but he loved her so and wanted her so to be comfortable with him again, but he knew it would take a long, long while until she could.

(Sorry, lack of sustenance in my post, can't focus..)
 
Thorne tensed a little as she felt the man holding her, but relaxing, staying tense made her body ache. Shivering a ltitle she laughed.”I’m not sleeping beauty.”She said sounding bemused as she thought about the human fairy tale, rubbing her cheek against lucifer’s chest in a unconscious gesture, like a cat scent marking their area. He was hers, even if she didn’t know what they were to each other anymore, she wasn’t about to let him go.

Tensing a little at his words, she swallowed. Trying to figure out how he could have figured out before relaxing, needing to. It hurt to much to be tense, and she was at ease in his arms, even vulnerable and hurt, she was trusting him to keep her safe. Looking at a loss, and afraid of his reaction. Though she was sure that he wasn’t angry with her, he’d come her to comfort her, not yelling or screaming. Shuddering a little she swallowed closing her eyes.

“I…I didn’t even know…I mean…I’d been feeling run down for days…but I thought it was just…”She stuttered and stopped, sounding so adorably lost and nervous that it was easy to see she was so young, so much younger that she had barely left childhood behind. “…I’m sorry..”she said pressing her face into his chest, guilt and pain in the words, because she had never wanted to disappoint him, didn’t want to hurt him, and she was afraid that she had.
 
The little things was what Lucifer appreciated right now, cause no big good things would happen for a good while he knew this. It was pleasant to feel her attention, her affection, even though it was scarse and forced for the moment due to their many things. He could almost feel her tensing and slight shifting, how her mind changed along with her body in his arms. Slipping one of his hands up her body, he gently put it on the side of her head, holding her close to him as she voice her concern.

'Shhh..', he voiced softly, smiling sadly as he he agreed with her, "Yea.. I'm sorry too..", he said, his voice most soft. He knew he had to be strong, if Thorne didn't break down Lucifer didn't think he would either as he had already broken down while she was asleep. "If you ever... You know.. This is not your fault. It was never your fault. Everything is my fault, I'm saying this because I want you to know that, and that if you should ever blame anyone, anyone for this, it should be me.", Lucifer said softly, firmly however as he was adamant in his belief that he was to blame for everything in one way or the other, and he wanted to shift her hate from herself to him if it would ever come to that, as he could never have it that she hated herself, he would simply not allow for it as long as he was alive.

"I love you Thorne, with everything that I have, don't you ever forget that.", he said softly, almost sweetly as he leaned his head down, pressing his lips on the top of her head as he kissed her hair once and softly. "You're the best thing in my life, I wouldn't be able to live without you anymore at this point.", he said, his lips pressed softly against her head as he followed with a sad sigh. "My selfish actions have destroyed so much... I know I can't even begin to ask this of you, ever, and I certainly don't deserve it, but... I'll do anything, anything you want for the rest of our lives, if you would eventually, someday, forgive me for what I've done to you... You can't even begin to understand how terrible I feel, I can't believe I would ever do something like that to you. I am infinitely sorry for my actions.", he said softly, exposing his heart like this as his voice broke a bit during the confession of his severe self loathing. He couldn't help but squeeze Thorne softly against himself while he talked, he was sad, scared, panicking if you will.
 
Thorne sighed softly, breathing slowly, relaxing. Needing to, closing her eyes as he spoke, relaxing at the other’s words. His voice was soothing her, soothing a deep seated fear of being hated. Biting her lip a little as she pressed her face into his chest, she rested a arm around his waist. Shifting, curling her body into his, even if her body wanted to rebel at the touch, at allowing him close, there was comfort in being held again, knowing that no matter what she did, or didn’t do, that she had a spot in this man’s arms. “you’re not to blame either…I…I should have known you would react violently when you found me reading…I just…hadn’t thought…”She sighed before closing her eyes, relaxing for a few minutes with him. Letting the silence become comfortable between them.

“I don’t want to live without you either…this is…just something to overcome…but I will get past it luc.”She muttered wincing as he squeezed her sore body closer to him, reverting to his nickname, to let him know that she really was working on getting past it, pain in her words as she realized how badly he was hurting. IT hurt something deep in her to know he was hating himself.”Don’t blame yourself either…please…if we are to be together…neither of us can focus solely on that moment….we need to remember what else we are together. Man and woman, lovers, king and queen….we are so much more then that moment.”She muttered sitting up to stroke his hair.

Easing away from him slowly, to make sure he knew she wasn’t running away.”Help me to the bathroom?I want to get a warm bath, belial said it would help with the soreness…”She muttered moving to the edge of the bed, waiting till he stood, standing slowly and wrapping a arm around his waist to walk. To proud to allow him to carry her, but not so proud to not accept help.

Pausing in the doorway she looked up at him, “Why don’t you go get some work done?”She muttered gently, looking up at him with a small smile, waving him away as she leaned against the doorframe. Not quite coming out and telling him that she was ordering him out of the room, but also not sounding accepting of having him in the room while she was bathing either. Hoping he’d understand. “Belial said rest a few days, and I’ll be okay. I promise.”She said looking up at him, knowing he was worrying about her.
 
"You couldn't have known that I'd be an idiot.", he whispered softly in response, closing his eyes as he felt their heartbeats sing together as the silence overcame them for the moment until it was time to break it once more. It was nice for him to hear that she still wanted to be with him, that she wouldn't live without him either. While it was like a breath of fresh air to hear his nickname again, he wasn't about to just stop hating himself for the worst thing he felt he had ever done to date, consciously or unconsciously. "I... I...", he stuttered with his whispers, his words trembling as he continued, "I'll try.. I.. But... I..", he kept on stuttering, silently groaning as he fought back the tears once more, successfully at that, only a light sniffling left as a trace when Thorne pulled herself out of his grasp and embrace.

"Of course my love. That sounds nice.", he voiced softly as he gazed lovingly upon her. What she didn't know was that Lucifer had left all work to be taken care of by Wrath and possibly Belial for a while, good while at that. He wasn't about to leave her side unless she specifically insisted on him to leave her alone. He wouldn't risk leaving her alone so that more dark thoughts could fester. He moved softly yet swiftly out of the bed, standing up beside her so that he would help her make her way to her destination. He helped her up, easing her up on her feet and helping her with his weight and strength to keep her up softly. As they made it to the baths, she paused them both, asking him clearly silly questions for him. "I have it covered, you shouldn't worry about that. I thought I could join you, keep you company and bath you.", he said, his voice and expression naive and anticipating that he could do it and not at all understanding that she wasn't comfortable with him in there with her. She would have to be clearer for the message to get through Luc's thick skull currently. He had persuaded himself so thoroughly that he would be with her wherever she went, that he missed her queues to pause in turn.
 
Thorne smiled a little at his stuttering, shaking her head a little.”Good. All I can ask is that you try.”She muttered sighing softly. Looking amused as he helped her, amused that he was so intent on it. The woman was so used to being able to take care of herself, that it was messing with her badly to not be able to do so. Glancing up at him she frowned slightly, trying to decide if he was really being that naïve. “Luc, go. Please.”She whispered not wanting to hurt his feelings, “I’m just going to read, and rest. Come back in a hour and you can help me out.Go.”She muttered ordering, her eyes soft as she looked up at him. Wanting him to understand. Not wanting to hurt him, but not wanting him to stay either.

Belial paused in the doorway, “Lucifer, I’ll stay with her.”The woman said, having come down to check on them when she found wrath in lucifer’s office, eyes pained. Because she knew how hard this had to be for the hell lord, but he knew that there was no helping them, at least nothing to do besides bracing them, and helping in the small ways. Which meant getting Lucifer out of the room for the moment, so Thorne could feel safe. Let the two have the moment of peace together, and just get comfortable again. "Wrath needs help anyways."she added, knowing it wasn't true. wrath could run things with his eyes closed, but it would be good for Lucifer to be able to do something productive instead of just waiting around for thorne to want to see him again
 
Thorne knew what Lucifer tried to say, what he tried to convey to her. Luc was content in that he didn't have to spell it out more then stuttering and a few words here and there for her to understand what he was trying to say. As she rejected his want to join her, Luc's eyes grew confused, stunned for a moment before they grew sad, withdrawn and finally understanding. "Oh.. Ok, I can do that.", he voides with understanding as he smiled weakly at her, bowing awkwardly as he turned and moved for the door only to be greeted by Belial once again making her appearance ever so frequently in his life. As he had traveled with his gaze on the floor, he looked up at Belial in surprise when she spoke to him. Taking a moment to push his whirling thoughts aside to register her words, he nodded, replying with a simple "Thank you." as he headed out through the door in a light haste.

Heading back to his office, taking a while as to dealing with his clouded mind for the moment, he entered, sounding a little stupid as he voiced himself, "Uhh... Ahh! Belial said you needed some help? Since when do you need help with this? It's not like it's anything difficult on the table today.", he said curiously as he eyed his friend, walking up to his own desk, standing over it on the opposite side of his friend. Lucifer's mind was clouded, it would clear up soon, but it would require a few day's sleep to settle himself.
 
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