Sid knew 100% that whatever he was currently dealing with regarding the strange feelings he had all dressed up was something to be dealt with later, something he was definitely going to explore and try to unpack. He definitely felt ... Different, and not in a bad way. In fact, he felt better than he had in nearly a year, not since ...
Alice's suggestion that he FaceTime Madison was like a pane of glass shattering, and he froze. "That, uh ..." Come on, think of an excuse or something.
"Hey, you know what, I'm gonna go grab you that drink you wanted." He said suddenly, heading for the door and down the stairs. Once in the kitchen, he went to the fridge and dug out a soda for Alice. Just as he stood up and closed the refrigerator door, his mom walked into the kitchen.
The two stared at each other for a second, and Sid blushed. "Hey, Mom."
"Sid? What the ... You look just like ..."
Sid nodded. "Yeah. Sorry. Didn't mean to make you think you'd seen a ghost."
"No, it's fine. So is this for that project for your channel that Alice is helping with?"
"Yeah. Kind of? She wants me to get used to looking like a girl and stuff before we work on getting actual cosplay. I just ... Fuck, this feels weird. Not that I look just like Madison, but ..." He gestured to his whole look. "All of this just feels ... Nice."
"And looking like her, it's not ... Not upsetting you?"
"Not really. It's weird, but like ... I guess it feels like there's a part of her still alive through me." He held up the soda. "Anyways, I need to get back up there and find some excuse why I can't FaceTime my sister on the other side of the country to show her that I look like her."
His mom sighed. "Sid, does Alice know what happened to Madison?"
"No. I ... I couldn't be honest when I talked about her at first. And now it's gonna be weird."
"Sid, just ... If you need to talk about it, or about anything, I'm here."
"I know, Mom." Sid said, then headed upstairs again.
Entering the room, he smiled at Alice, then sighed. "I owe you the truth, for you helping me with all this. I can't FaceTime Madison to show her me looking like this. Not because I'm embarrassed or anything. I'd have absolutely loved to show her. She would have loved it, both me doing something so daring and you of all people helping me. But I actually can't, because ..." He trailed off and sighed again.
"Madison didn't go off to college on the West Coast. She was supposed to. But then ... Madison and I were always close. Like, really close. And she had a boyfriend who ... Didn't like how close we were. He got angry one night when he saw me and Madison going for a walk. He ... He tried to run us down in his car. Tried to run me down. But ... Madison pushed me out of the way and didn't have the chance to get out herself. She, uh, died in my arms waiting for the ambulance."
He glanced over at the image in the mirror. "Seeing her in my reflection, it's ... Reassuring, kind of. Like part of her is still alive through me. Still with me. And that's leaving out all of the other weird feelings right now that seeing my reflection like that is causing. But none of them are bad feelings. Hell, I haven't been able to talk about that night since ... Since it happened, just about. Even acknowledging she's gone ... Well, I mean, I lied about her to you about where she was so I didn't have to talk about it. But now ... I dunno. I feel ... Stronger. More alive. Happy, almost. For the first time since that night."