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DESPERATION & DEPRIVATION l [ Iilan l Mina ]

I

Iilan

Star
Joined
Jan 18, 2009
Oh, Roxas could kill that motherfucker. How could that fucking little redhead cheat on him with that slut of a cheerleader? More importantly, how could everyone in the school but Roxas know about it? Oh, how it made his blood boil with all the rage and anger he felt at the moment. He wanted to take a knife and carve into Axel's ass like a turkey on Thanksgiving, but sadly that was illegal. The boy stomped through the hallway to his next class, he had just left lunch where he punched Axel in the face after hearing the news of him sleeping with the slutty cheerleader, the one who probably had urinary tract infection, or at least the blond had hoped so. He wanted Axel to feel massive amounts of pain for what he had done, the black eye he had given him was not enough.

The small blond noticed his fist was still clenched from when he had done the glorious deed of punching the cheating bastard in the face earlier only after he shoved a Freshman out of the way and into the locker, producing a small dent from where his face landed. Hey, it was his fault, the boy shouted for everyone to "fucking move" when he exited the lunchroom, the glass on the door cracking a bit as he did so. Suddenly, Roxas heard a fit of giggles from a trio of girls down the hallway and stalked over to them, glaring at them. "So, you think it's fucking funny, do you?!" He shouted at them. "You think it's funny that EVERYONE but little old me knew about Axel fucking the whore? Well, fuck you, you stupid cunts!" Obviously, the boy was a bit...um, what's the word? Angry. He had every right to be, of course, Axel had slept with another person, a woman, no less.

Roxas stalked off into his last period class, his teacher looking at him as he entered. "Roxas, you look a bit angry, what happened?" The blond only glared at his teacher as he took his seat. "Oh, did you finally find out about Axel?" He questioned, shuffling some papers in his hands. The blond's mouth dropped a bit, even his teacher knew Axel was cheating on him? No fucking way, this was ridiculous. He was truly the only one in the entire school to not know his boyfriend was sleeping with the cheerleader. Oh, this was the most embarrassing day of his life. Sadly, it was about to get worse, seeing as he shared his final period with Axel, who's seat was right next to his. Fucking great.
​
 
Hell, he never knew Roxas could punch so hard. When the squirt literally knocked him off of his feet, he felt as he temporarily lost his ability to see on his left eye. He expected a weak shove, slap to the face, a kick to the shin, or all of the above, but he definitely didn't expect for the tiny blond to land a skilled swing into his oh-so-handsome face ! He didn't know his punishments would come around so cruelly, but when they did, he felt an incredible wave of guilt completely wash out his insides. His boyfriend of nearly two years, Roxas, actually dumped him because he so happened to have gotten a bit tipsy one night with a cheerleader. It wasn't his fault that he was almost knocked unconscious from the drink she offered ! Hell, he was a boy, too ! If his hormones were on a roll, there was no stopping him when there was a good fuck waiting for him in bed. But Roxas wasn't so merciful, even when he tried to reason that it wasn't his choice to have knocked her up. Nothing got through that pissy kid. And sometimes, he wondered if he had been dating a girl all along. But then again, a girl couldn't have punched this forcefully. Covering his bruised eye, he scurried into the nearest restroom to treat his wound, hidden from any prying hyenas who wanted a chance to see his demise in person. The black eye wasn't too serious, but it did leave a nasty purple spot under his tear ledges. Axel nearly shattered the restroom mirror into pieces.

Then, as he clumbered out of the public bathroom with a wet paper towel clutched to the side of his face, he was faced with Lenina, the cheerleader whom was the fault for this whole rendezvous. Then, as if this whole incident was his fault, the girl shot her knee up his crotch, sending him into a second hell that refused to leave him, even as he fell to the ground in complete agony. He limped to the nurse's office, where he received a full lecture about faithfulness from the assistant there who treated the purplish ring around his eye. Then, he sulked into class. He was just about as pissed off about everything as Roxas was. So as soon as he entered class, he threw his backpack on the ground and plopped into his seat, lazily sprawling his limbs out. He slumped his posture and threw his head back, muttering incoherent swear words under his breath. Fucking Roxas. Fucking cheerleader. He didn't need them all. Well, maybe he didn't need Lenina, but ... Roxas ? Hnnn.

It was totally awkward to sit right next to his ex-boyfriend, really. He was just about to request a seating change, but he decided to ignore him instead. Axel wanted to speak to him, but why risk getting another black eye ? Things would change dramatically from now on. They wouldn't be able to kiss each other across the seat ... pass notes during lectures ... fool off together during lab assignments ... and Axel would have to find another kid to cheat off of. Axel messed up the cinnamon red hair on the back of his head, grunting in frustration. And with an inward sigh, he turned to face his ex-lover, leaning in ever so slightly as if a bit frightened that Roxas would lash at him again, " Now, come on, Roxas baby ! This was all a mistake ! A big misunderstanding ! I was drunk ! You of all people should understand me ! "
 
As Roxas waited for the asshole to arrive he looked back upon the two lovely years they'd spent together. He could remember the first day Axel asked him out and how he couldn't stop blushing. Hell, he could remember even further back when the two met on the first day of school and how their ritual of passing notes to one another when they were bored began. He could remember their first date to go see whatever horrendous movie they saw and making fun of it the whole time, which brought a slight smile to the blond's gentle face, but it instantly hardened and he was angry once more. He then remembered hearing those two girls talking about how Axel had knocked up Lenina and how she wasn't sure whether she was going to get an abortion or not. The pencil in Roxas's usually delicate hand snapped in two, he was pissed once more.

He glared as the cheater entered the room and took the seat next to him like he always had, the only thing different today was that his face was bruised and his balls were throbbing with pain, unknown to Roxas. The boy's lips turned into a slight smile as he heard the man muttering under his breath, a sign of frustration, that was a good start, but it wasn't pain, which is what he wanted the man to feel. He also wanted him to feel betrayal and humiliation, but he he wasn't quite sure how to achieve those, so pain would be good enough. Roxas turned slightly as Axel leaned towards him, ready to leap over the seat and claw at the man.

What did Axel just call him? Did he seriously call him baby after what he had done? Oh, the poor man. "Don't call me baby." The blond said, clear rage in his voice. "The one you should be calling baby is the stupid slut that you knocked up!" The boy glared daggers at the poor redhead, seriously considering using his broken pencil to stab him in the eye with. "I-I just don't believe this! What do you mean I should understand you? I've been drunk with you before too Axel, I just know how to keep my penis in my pants! You know what you are, Axel? You're just...just like what Britney Spears is talking about in that song! You're a fucking womanizer! You're a whore!"

( oh, I love this roleplay already. xD )​
 
Axel's eyebrows knit together as Roxas literally screamed at his face, anchoring his heart and dragging it to the pit of his flipped stomach. Hell, was he that pissed ? Well, shit. Being in a crowded classroom of forty students didn't help with his attempt to hang on to his ex-boyfriend's leg, but Axel was actually very desperate at this point. He thought he could cope with life without Roxas, but upon seeing that angelic face he now had no access to touching- well, it drove him to the brink of insanity. His day wouldn't be complete without a kiss, and he now had no reason to anticipate a blowjob afterschool. But receiving oral sex wasn't his worst concern right now ( though he had to admit that it was one of his concerns ) ! It would undoubtedly be an obstacle to get through Roxas at this point ... man, he didn't even imagine that his sweet baby could be this demonic because of a small mistake he made a few days ago ... Was he even talking to him ? Axel pulled back as he saw Roxas keep a firm grip on that broken pencil, eyeing the sharp wooden edges warily. " Now, Roxy baby, let's not get too angsty here- ... put that pencil down ... " he murmured, holding his hands up in case he would actually have to defend himself from an incoming stab shower.

" B-But ... it wasn't my fault ! I-I don't even like fucking women ! " he complained, looking downright helpless and at fault in this current scenario. He kept his voice low so that the teacher wouldn't hear, but at the same time, he was getting riled up, too. Okay, so maybe he did commit some unspeakable sin, but all relationships needed to have a few scratches to be perfectly healthy ! He wouldn't crawl into that cheerleader's den in another million years, and the present and future was much more important than the past ! There was nothing he could do to mend what already happened, but he could prove himself to be a better lover for Roxas if he'd give him the chance ! Now ... how could he summarize all of that in a few timid phrases so that Roxas wouldn't kill him in mid-sentence ? " You know the pleasure's all in you, babe ! C'mon, Roxas ... I'm your whore ! We all know that already. The entire school knows it. We're an item ! " he whined, glancing over at their teacher to make sure that he wasn't going to start class anytime soon. He would have to buy a lot of time to soothe this thunderstorm ...

He pursed his lips together, bearing a facial expression of total confusion. Womanizer ? Britney Spears ? What the hell ? " That- I have to be honest with you- I can't deny that fact ... but still ! " he pleaded, " If I wasn't so desperate, I wouldn't be clinging onto you like this ... Roxas ... " Then, before he could say anything more, the teacher slapped his Expo marker on the whiteboard and announced that class was now officially in session.

( Ah, me too. xD )
 
"We were an item." Roxas said, correcting Axel's mistake. "You see, Axel. To be an item two people have to actually want to be together and at the moment I want to kill you, not kiss you." The blond whispered now that class had started. No matter how angry the boy was, he wasn't going to miss their teacher's lectures. He was a straight A student and wasn't going to lose that because of some stupid redhead, especially not so far into the semester. So the blond closed his ears to Axel and honed his hearing onto his teacher, although his lectures usually put him to sleep, no matter what subject the topic was. He glanced at Axel one last time, admiring the hurt look on his handsome face before turning back to the board, jotting down whatever was on it.

Quite frankly though, Axel was still on his mind. He couldn't believe that Axel actually wanted him to forgive him this soon for what he had done. Roxas doubted he could forgive him at all, actually, but he supposed he would have to someday, perhaps at their high school reunion, the twenty-five year one, not the ten year. There were a few things he'd miss about Axel though, such as kissing him and sex was always nice, especially the ritual blow job he gave him after school. There was nothing quite like hearing the male moan out his name as he climaxed that made Roxas smile. The boy instantly shook his head to rid himself of any thoughts like that though, he couldn't think of Axel like that anymore, the only thing he could imagine him doing was fucking that cheerleader, fucking her like he fucked him, which made him want to vomit uncontrollably.

Roxas sighed as he set down his broken pencil and closed his eyes as he massaged his temples. All of this was much too stressful for him, especially for high school and with midterms coming up. He could not deal with this at the moment and he couldn't wait for this class to end so he could just go home and mope.​
 
Gah, he hated it when people manipulated his words to backfire it on him. And he loathed it when people changed present tenses to their past forms so that they could emphasize the fact that it should remain behind them. " Don't do this to me ! " he cried in complete misery, burying his face into his arms on the desk's surface. The teacher didn't even bother to remind him that they were in the middle of class, because Axel usually slept during lectures, anyways. And he decided to forgive him for this one afternoon because he felt sorry for the kid and his grotesquely distinctive left eye. Axel spent the remainder of classtime doodling on a piece of notebook paper with his cheek pressed to the desk in laziness. He didn't have the spirit to sit up straight anymore. And as if his entire back was constructed with jelly, he didn't budge or shift in his seat. One would have thought he was actually dead with his lack of movement and expression.

Now, Axel wasn't the type to be sappy or totally romantic, but he did whatever his heart ordered for him to do because he felt as if it was necessary to win the affections of his lover again. The whole time, he was consecutively writing three sentences in order, caring whether or not his hand was cramping up from going on with that incredibly messy handwriting of his. At the end of class, he was on the verge of fainting from exhaustion, but he finally marked the period of his heartfelt note and weakly sat up to admire his work. On a piece of paper; front and back- were the sentences 'I love you, I need you, I can't live without you' written on every single line and margin. His palm was sweaty, and he rubbed his hand on his jacket, standing up with a defeated look on his face as the bell signaled for them to leave the classroom. There was no point in waiting for Roxas anymore. The kid didn't even want to look at his face. Hell, he wanted to kill him ! He would have to try again in a matter of a few months after he calmed down. Then again, wouldn't someone like Axel have moved on, anyways ? He was, after all, not one to stay attached to a person for too long.

He slapped the paper onto Roxas's desk and coolly shuffled out of the classroom behind a moving line of near-dead students, shoving his aching right hand into his pocket. That was honestly the most productive he had ever been since he even started school.
 
Throughout the whole class all Roxas did was think about the giant asshole next to him. It's like his mind was a movie theater and all that was playing that day was "Axel and Roxas' Happy Times Together." Quite frankly, it made him want to stab his brain to death. While yes, the moments they had together were wonderful and made the blond feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but he wasn't entirely sure if all of the happy memories made up for the horrible thing that Axel had done. Was Axel worth forgiving? Roxas loved him, he loved him a hell of a lot and Axel was his best friend. He'd sure as hell miss him if he just dropped him from his life and moved on, although he wasn't entirely sure there was anyone to move on to. After his rather loud outburst in the lunchroom, how could anyone be attracted to him? Hell, he was surprised Axel still wanted him.

As the bell signaled the end of class, the blond was a bit taken back as Axel's hand slapped a note on his desk, on that was covered in the man's chicken scratches that he called handwriting. He unfolded the paper and read the first few lines of the note before realizing that the whole paper said the same thing, 'I love you, I need you, I can't live without you.' His lips were tugging upwards as he skimmed the note, slowly forming into a slight smile. Damn it, why did Axel have to make it so hard to be mad at him? The man wasn't much of a romantic, but when he cared about someone and actually put forth effort, he was really, really sweet.

The boy put his head to his desk and groaned, stuffing the paper into his pants pocket as he did so. "Excuse me, Roxas? I know you're kind of having a...moment with Axel, but I really need to get home and I cant' lock my room with you inside." He stood and rolled his eyes as his teacher asked him to leave and went to his locker to put his books away, unsure of what exactly to do next. He was still incredibly pissed off at Axel, but already he missed having Axel there to push him against the lockers and kiss him. Fuck, this breakup was already taking it's toll.
 
Truthfully, he felt a bit foolish for having wasted his class time writing that useless note. Knowing Roxas, he wouldn't have given it a second glance and might have trashed it the second he walked out of that classroom. Axel was stubborn, but he knew his boundaries and when he needed to leave someone alone. With a depressed sigh, he massaged the sore ring around his eye, wincing every now and then as the bruise stung his abused flesh. He didn't mind it so much anymore. He deserved to have a near-permanent mark on his face to let people know of the sin he committed against the boy he loved- oh god, who was he kidding ? There was no way in hell that he would have to cope with having this ugly watermark on his handsome face for more than a couple of weeks ! This was insanity ! And why was he limping ? God, that woman drove a really nasty kick up his crotch- of all people he could knock up, he had to hump a fucking cheerleader ... He pitied himself and his poor choices so much. Axel, in his almost-unconscious state, didn't know where exactly he was walking to until he recognized the black numbers that were engraved on the silver plates of the lockers. Almost like natural instinct, of course, he was heading towards their regular meeting place after school. Oh, this was so typical.

With a frustrated groan, he kicked the nearest pole to himself, recoiling his throbbing foot with a flying curse screamed from between his lips. He hated Mondays forever, now. But he had a reason to be here. His textbooks were still in Roxas's locker, and he would really need them for his classes tomorrow ... there was no reason to safe keep them there no longer, right ? They shared lockers because his was on the other side of the campus, but that wasn't so inconvenient anymore. Part of him didn't want to approach Roxas again, but the more dominant side that needed to see his ex-boyfriend's angelic face a second time for his day to be a bit better prompted him to bravely step forward. Naturally, he held up his hands in self-defense, using one hand to quickly withdraw his books from Roxas's locker. Well, what do you know ? It looked as if the blond was going to have some extra room, now. " I-I'm not going to make you any more upset, all right ? I just came to get my textbooks. " he murmured in slight fright, fitting the two binders under his arm, too.

( Sorry it's so short ! My mom's threatening me. Dl And my apologies for not being able to reply to your message. I was pulled off at that time, too. And before I had a chance to give my opinion, you already wrote a post. xD )
 
Roxas sighed as he saw Axel once again, just how many times was he going to be forced to see the man today? They had broken up, he should never have to see him again, but obviously that wasn't going to happen. The boy bit his lip as the redhead seemed to be actually frightened of him, which was just hilarious because Axel wore the pants in their relationship, not the other way around, but he guessed he should be scared seeing as he punched him in the eye and then said he wanted to kill him. Oh well though, Roxas said a lot of stupid things when he was angry, it wasn't entirely his fault. "Give me your damn books, Axel." The blond said, sighing once more as he took them from the redhead's arms and put them back in his locker, shutting it once he was done. While he was a major bitch when he was angry, he wasn't going to make Axel walk all the way across campus to his locker, he knew how lazy the male was and didn't want him to get in trouble for never bringing his textbooks to class.

He shifted from foot to foot, running a hand through his hair as he stared at Axel's eye, mainly at the purple spot underneath it. He bit his tongue before finally opening his mouth, "I'm sorry for punching you, kind of."

( Now this, this is short. xD )
 
A dim glow of hope flickered in his heart as Roxas snatched the books from his grasp, but as he realized that it wouldn't make a difference in their severed relationship, the light extinguished. Roxas was considerate enough to keep them there to prevent Axel from walking to the other side of the campus, but wouldn't that be better for him ? After all, just a few minutes ago, Roxas gave him the dirtiest glare ever and confessed that he would rather murder than be stuck with him again. What was the point of keeping his textbooks and binders there, then ? " I was actually going to do my homework tonight, but I guess you have other plans for me. " he shrugged, half of himself not quite believing that he admitted that he would do his schoolwork. Without Roxas to distract him, where was the fun in life ? Axel was a bright kid, but he had the shortest attention span ever. Roxas took up about 99.9% of his life, and the remaining O.O1% were thoughts of sex, but that tiny bit of his brain sort of blended in with his ex-boyfriend, too. What would he do with all of those blank memories ? Now that his assignments were crammed in Roxas's locker and shut from his reach, there was no way he could start on them this evening, anyways. Speaking of evenings, what would he do in the afternoon ? His schedule really worried him, now. Who would play Super Smash Brothers Melee with him ? Who would be there to eat his home-made 'supa mega ultra hot burritos' ? " I'll come pick it up tomorrow morning, I guess. " he murmured, sounding rather depressed- a tone that Axel normally didn't use.

" Oh, this ? " he asked, momentarily reaching up to gingerly press the bruise along his high cheekbones, " I deserved it. " Honestly ? He still didn't understand how it was his fault when he vulnerably ended up being manipulated by that bitchy cheerleader. He wanted to leave, but the real Axel was prompting him to do something to bring Roxas back into his arms. After all, he didn't date him for two entire years so that it could end because of a huge misunderstanding ! He didn't care if Roxas believed his excuses anymore. He just wanted him back. In one fluid moment, he wrapped an arm around his ex-lover's waist, tugging his hips forward to attach their lower torsos. As always, his fingers were barely dipping under the waistband of his pants, gingerly probing what was his. " Come on, Roxy baby- ... I'm sorry ! You know I love you. I love you more than anyone or anything in this entire world ! If you don't want me to speak to anyone else but you from now on, I'll do that ! Fuck, I'll even tattoo your name onto my dick. " he reasoned with a tone of immature desperation, his lips carefully pursing themselves over the tender flesh of his neck.

( Awww, it's not short ! It's still a post ! )
 
Roxas would be lying if he wasn't thinking about who he would now hang out with, now that he and Axel were broken up. He had absolutely no one. Well, he of course had a few friends to count on, but none of them were like his beloved redhead. He and Axel were best friends and knew everything about each other, their favorite things to do, favorite songs, favorite bands, favorite pair of underwear; Axel didn't have a favorite pair, he preferred to go commando, but Roxas made him wear underwear every once in awhile. The boy played with the bottom of his shirt as he thought about all the things he and Axel did together and how boring everything would be without him. Hell, even eating wouldn't be fun without Axel, his burritos were killer and Roxas loved them almost as much as he did the redhead, there was no way he could live without them. He looked up to the taller male as he used that seldom used tone, depression. He had only ever heard it once, when Axel accidentally ran over his cat, but he forgave him eventually.

It was true, Axel sure as hell did deserve the shiner that he had given him, but still, he couldn't help but feel a bit bad about putting a blemish on the male's handsome face. He was a bit taken back as Axel suddenly pulled him towards him, their waists touching as they had many times before. Before the boy knew it, the other's hand was a bit down his pants and his lips were to his neck, just resting there gently. "Axel..."He said with a sigh, wrapping his own arms around him, feeling that familiar frame. He couldn't believe that the male would actually do all of that for him and he was actually being serious, Roxas could tell. "You don't have to do any of that, just please don't do this. I'm not ready." He squeezed Axel close once before letting his arms drop to his sides. "Not yet."
 
Maybe their time together was really destined to come to an end ... relationships were always like that for Axel. If one thread went loose, the entire cloth unraveled and fell into a heap of jumbled yarn. A mistake was a mistake, and nobody, not even the bitch he slept with, wanted to share the blame with him. That was always the case with Axel. In the midst of every healthy bond, there had to be some kind of misunderstanding that almost made it seem like it was his fault that everything went wrong. He thought Roxas was different, forgiving at least. Not a single individual wanted to believe that he was the victim of this entire ordeal, and that his intentions didn't have anything to do with wanting to fuck her. Even Axel's 'gang' members, or his threatening posse, told him to stop moping around and suck up to the facts. But that was the problem- they weren't facts. For the first time in his life, he actually felt hurt. Physical pain didn't make him learn or realize anything, but emotional suffering did. He lost his support beam, and if Roxas didn't believe him, then who would ? In a few days, he would force himself to completely forget about his best friend and move on to his normal lifestyle of fucking numerous women and men on a daily basis. He wanted to convince himself that the newly acquired freedom from faithfulness would feel amazing, but ... he preferred to be enslaved.

Slightly disheartened at Roxas's answer, he pursed his lips together against the blond's neck, slowly withdrawing his head from the kissed flesh. 'Not yet' was a nicer way of saying that he wasn't interested anymore, right ? It was because he pitied him that he decided to toy with the strings of his heart to see how long they would last before it would snap and break in two. " You think you're so innocent, Roxas ! " he snarled, slamming a fist into the locker next to Roxas's head. It caved in. Like fire, he was easily riled up, and when he became agitated, his emotions were extremely difficult to cradle. " I thought you loved me ! After two ... " he harshly bit on his lower lip and stopped himself from strangling his ex-lover, " ... I spent two years admiring and staring at you and you only. I'm humble enough to admit that I've done some wrong, but you- ... as my boyfriend- my best friend, you couldn't even let me have five fucking seconds to explain myself ! You punched and insulted me in front of the entire school, and went on and on about some cheerleader who drove her fucking knee up my crotch and laughed as she watched me limp away ! Is that what you want from me ? For me to feel miserable ? To be taunted by the whole fucking campus ? "

He scoffed in disbelief, his fingers unraveling as Axel's knuckles slightly bled from the strong impact with the metal doors. " As if losing you wasn't enough to make my heart bleed. " he murmured, pushing off of his ex-boyfriend to storm down the hallway. In short, he lost all faith in love and trust now.
 
Axel couldn't have been more wrong in his assumptions that Roxas was leading him on. He planned to forgive him, he really did, it would just take time for him to get to that point and then eventually get back to where they were. If only Axel had not have gone off the deep end and punched the fucking locker, leaving a rather deep dent in the metal. What the hell did the male mean by thinking he was innocent? Innocent about what? He was confused as hell and having the redhead yell at him didn't help matters at all, it only made him get angry. Did Axel actually think that he wasn't going to give him a chance to explain himself? It was just that he was fucking pissed after hearing he had been cheated on. That left quite a big wound in his heart, like he had been stabbed by his lover and like most people, he covered it up with rage. He wasn't technically angry at Axel, he was angry at his actions and his choices, not to mention the cheerleader who he still had to punch in the gut. He smiled a bit at the thought, that would certainly be fun. He'd never liked that girl anyways, so that was an added bonus.

Roxas pulled out his phone and quickly typed out the message, 'How do you think I feel? Do you think I'm actually happy about all of this? I'm not, I'm angry and sad. Don't walk out on us, you haven't lost me, I just need time. I still love you.' He sent the text message to Axel's cell and slumped against his locker, leaning his head back against it. He didn't want to lose Axel, he wanted it to be sometime in the future so he could forget about all this crap and just be with him. Sadly, time machines had not been invented yet, but as soon as he got home, Roxas was certain he'd start doing the research himself.
 
The almighty Axel never cried. But he was so close to spilling a few tears right then. Or maybe it was his heart that was doing all the weeping, because all he did was repeatedly pump his hands into fists without caring much about his opened knuckles. It took a whole mess of emotions to actually tick the redhead off, and though his reasons weren't very justified, he was still pissed off because Axel wasn't quite used to being depressed. He preferred being angry instead, because his entire head blacked out instead of stinging with pain. He knew he made poor choices and that he shouldn't have knocked the cheerleader up whether he was unconscious or not, but Axel couldn't help but feel a tinge of betrayal. Of course, Roxas would feel that a lot more than him, but the redhead wasn't used to being pressured with a flurry of feelings. Once he was on edge about something, he tended to drive his frustrations off any cliff until it would crash and burn at the bottom. Now, all he needed was time and a bit of a distraction to think things over and clear his mind off of the weekend's past events. Finding something worthwhile to do wouldn't be easy, but Axel was considering a hot shower or a nap to cool his boiling head. " Fucking shit. " he growled, gingerly holding his injured hand with the other to examine the cut. It didn't hurt as much as he did inside, but it stung, nonetheless.

Just as he was about to turn the corner and follow the thin trail of students walking off of the school campus, he felt his thigh vibrating. Normally, he wouldn't have picked it up, but out of mere curiosity, he angrily flipped open his cellphone and skimmed over the received text message without much thought, gritting his teeth together in towering rage. So now he wanted to play with him ? Give him time ? I still love you ? If his signals weren't so conspicuous, he might have figured that out, but with all of those death glares, verbal threats, and especially that loud and obnoxious announcement of their break-up- ... yeah, he possessed every right to feel used and confused. Roxas couldn't throw and take him back whenever he wanted. Days from now, he would be fucking another woman or man to vent out his anger by the time his blond friend would grant him permission to be together again. Currently, he wasn't in the mood to think or fret about Roxas or anyone else. Maybe tomorrow morning, he would still be muttering his friend's name in his sleep, but right now, his ex-lover was the last person on his mind.

His fingers wouldn't cooperate with him to press the correct buttons on his cellphone, so his message came out looking like a bunch of gibberish, but it the overall note was pretty obvious to see, " Take all the time you want. " He wouldn't have the patience to wait that long, anyways.
 
As soon as he read Axel's text message, or more like deciphered it, he instantly regretted sending the text message he had before. He knew to leave the man alone whenever he was like this, insanely angry, but he had no right to be, at least not as much as Roxas was. Of course the boy didn't know exactly what to feel any longer. He thought he could take all the time he needed to forgive Axel and the redhead would be there waiting for him all along, but now it seemed like the other male wanted nothing to do with him, mainly because of the things he came up with in his stupid little head. He loved Axel, but sometimes the man jumped to conclusions and he could just kill him for that. The boy ran a hand through his messy locks and sighed, wondering when this would all blow over. He hoped that come tomorrow Axel would be in a better mood and they could talk it all out and go back to being best friends, but that didn't seem likely, sadly.

Roxas quickly picked himself and his things up and drove home, collapsing on his full sized bed as more thoughts of his beloved redhead ran through his brain. Mainly he was imagining what he was doing at that moment, hopefully feeling as much regret as Roxas was. Thinking of what Axel was doing only led to more thoughts of the male, imagining their happy moments together once again, all the times they'd done together in this very bed, from watching movies late at night to Axel taking the boy's virginity, or was it in Axel's bed? He couldn't really remember, nor did he want to at the moment, seeing as tears began to form in his eyes and slowly trickle down his gentle cheeks. He quickly grabbed a pillow and held it to him, closing his eyes as he desperately tried to go to sleep, wanting to stop thinking about the male as soon as possible. "Fucking Axel." He muttered to himself, his voice a bit shaken.
 
Was there a reason for him to stay glued to one person now ? Hell, without the pressure of handling a relationship, he was free to fuck whomsoever he wished ! He should have taken the advice of his friends earlier, because if Roxas was truly going to leave him hanging like this, then he would have called someone up to hump his misery out. But honestly, sex wasn't going to feel so orgasmic anymore. And maybe in the future, he might accidentally groan the blond's name and end up being kicked in the crotch for it again. When he entered his one-room apartment, he abandoned his backpack in front of the entrance door and headed straight for the showers. The steam from the water relaxed him, and as his crimson hair fell back over his shoulders and handsomely slicked back to reveal his face, Axel opened those fluorescent green eyes through the shower about halfway. There was something missing about ... everything. Roxas was supposed to be in front of him, naked from head to toe with that adorable smile plastered on his face, a loofah held in his hand to scrub both of them. The pouring water reminded him of their passionate kiss in the rain ... and of so many more memories he didn't want to forget.

When he stepped out from the glass stall, he felt a bit shittier than before. Nevertheless, he towel-dried his hair and left it damp and flattened, caring less to style it with gel. There was no point in that as of right now. Dressing into a pair of simple silk black boxers, he stretched out over his bed and moved his full limbs about, grunting. He stared up at the ceiling in hopes that the whiteness of it would eventually lull him to sleep, but the dizziness refused to come. Instead, he turned his head to face the only stuffed animal in his room- a teddy bear he purchased with his own money because the color of its fur resembled Roxas's hair. He affectionately named it 'Roxy', and when he pressed its paw, it repeated Roxas's recorded voice. He reached over and carefully pressed the button embedded in the plush hand, gently closing his eyes in slight regret as he heard the bear shouting ' That's so lame, Axel ! What the hell ? Stop it ! ' His own voice got recorded in that machine, and he could hear how happily both of them were laughing as Axel chased his boyfriend around with that demented teddy bear. He almost smiled.

His voice: " Say it ! Come on ! Must I sit on you to make it come out ? "
Then Roxas's: " All right, all right ! I love you ! I love you, Axel ! "
Then his again: " Heh, finally ! I love you, too- Ro- "

Then the recording device disconnected because there was no more memory available. In a way, 'Roxy' was all he had, now. " What are you looking at ? " he growled at the lifeless object, smacking it upside the head in hatred, " I didn't do anything ! " Those beady eyes had a way of turning him inside out. And it was all Roxas's fault that he now developed a habit of talking to plushies.

But he pressed the button again.
 
Try as he might, sleep wouldn't come to Roxas. He tried to force himself to sleep, even hitting himself on the head once, but that only brought more pain to the poor boy, pain he didn't want. He opened his eyes and rolled over on his bed, trying to get comfortable, but of course as he rolled over he only saw his picture wall. A wall full of pictures of him and his friends, or just him. The large majority of the wall were pictures of Axel however. Pictures of Axel in his bathing suit at the pool, pictures of Axel at school, pictures of Axel at the park, pictures of Axel at the mall and just countless pictures of the redheaded male, all reminding the blond of memories of him. "God hates me." He concluded, continuing to stare at the wall that was practically dedicated to Axel. He couldn't take it anymore, this didn't feel right. At this very moment, if he and Axel were together he'd have just finished giving him his after school blow job, a treat for making it through the day and not failing, or molesting Roxas in the bathroom. It was the simple things like that and what some would consider weird, that made his and Axel's relationship so special and unique. The two understood each other and were perfect together, would he let some stupid cheer leading whore come between that? Certainly not.

Roxas grabbed his cell phone again and bit his lip as he pondered calling Axel or not. He was probably punching something at the moment out of anger, seeing as that was what he mostly did when he was this pissed. Axel didn't seem like a meathead at all, but he sure did have qualities like one. He bit his tender lip and thought about calling the male for a good, full five minutes. Questions swam in his brain; would Axel even want to talk to him? What happens if Axel didn't want to be with him anymore? Well, he'd just keel over and die. Not being with Axel wasn't an option, not now. Axel was his everything and he wanted him back. Now.

He quickly dialed Axel's number and waited rather impatiently for the male to answer. "Please pick up, please pick up." He said softly.

( I'm off to bed darling, I'll post in the early morning! Night! :D )
 
After a few minutes of sharing a one-sided conversation with Roxy, he literally fell asleep for almost thirty seconds, if that was even possible in a situation as depressing as this ... From pressing his paw too many times, the installed battery went dead, but Axel wasn't conscious to mourn over his speechless teddy bear any longer. After being reassured that Roxas would be happier without him to mess up his life, he was put at a slight rest in his involuntary nap. He dreamed of caressing his top-naked body at night when they weren't quite feeling for sex but rather foreplay, and when Axel thought it would be far more interesting if they tried adding hot wax to the equation. He was a pyromaniac, so his intentions were rather innocent when he surrounded his entire bedroom with lit candles, but Roxas didn't seem to like the suggested kink so much. As expected, Axel repeatedly mumbled his ex-boyfriend's name during his sleep, clutching onto the pillows he never quite used unless Roxas wanted it to muffle his moans.

Axel was normally a heavy sleeper, but because his temporary state of slumber was indeed momentary, the vibration of his cellphone caused him to flinch in his sleep. Cracking his eyelids open, he snatched the annoying contraption into his hand and flipped the device open, hesitating whether or not to actually answer Roxas on the other line. How did he know it was Roxas ? Well, he would soon have to change his caller ID from 'Roxy Baby' to 'Person I Don't Know' sometime soon ... and that ringtone needed to leave. He lazily held the cellphone to his cheek, scratching his sturdy stomach as he rolled over onto his back, " ... Yeah ? " That was all he could say for now. Usually, he greeted him with 'Hey, baby !' or something like 'I know, I know- You called to say you love me !', but situations called for different measures. Maybe Roxas would apologize. Even if he didn't mean it, it would surely help to calm the tempest brewing in his head. Or possibly this was an opportunity for him to admit that he was sorry for being such an ass ! " Before you say anything ... " he mumbled, squeezing his sore eyes shut, " I don't want to argue with you. And ... I didn't mean all of the things I said earlier. Half of it- I don't even remember what I said ... or meant ... It was all just useless rambling that I got so worked up about ... "

The redhead barely smiled, shielding his eyes with an arm cast over his face, " ... I know, I know- did you call to hear my voice ? "

( All right ! Thanks for telling me ! I'm off, too ! Good night ! )
 
A few rings later and Axel had finally picked up, causing Roxas to be both happy and a bit scared as to what would happen next. The other male didn't sound too happy, more like he had just been shocked awake by his cell phone going off, which was Roxas' fault, whoops. His doubts and nervousness were washed away by Axel's words though. This was officially the best phone call of his life, Axel had said he didn't mean a single thing he meant earlier, which was great, seeing as what he said really hurt Roxas. The male grabbed the pillow next to him and squeezed it tightly, a sigh of relief coming from his mouth. "H-Hey Axel, yeah...I did call to hear you." He said with a sniffle as he sat up and leaned back against the backboard of his bed. "I also wanted to say," he took a gulp, preparing for his lengthy apology. "That I'm sorry for not like...believing that you were kind of innocent 'cause you were drunk and all and...yeah. I'm also sorry for being so mean and punching you and stuff a-and I'm sorry for not apologizing sooner, but I was really mad." He bit his lip softly as he spoke. "I don't want to be apart anymore, life isn't fun without you." That was the truth, he completely hated the last hour or so without the other male. Without Axel there was just no joy, no passion, no excitement and Roxas wanted it all back.
 
Highschool would simply cease to be as exciting without fresh rumors of the Axas couple drifting around. Axel wasn't looking forward to organizing his ravaging group of excited fangirls, because, quite frankly, he didn't want them. He wanted Roxas, but he was out of his reach, now. It baffled him to realize that there was someone he couldn't win over, no matter how hard he tried. It rather ruined his 'casanova' image if the black eye didn't already. Speaking of the bruise, he probed his fingertips around it, pressing wherever it hurt the most to see if it was fatal. How long would this blemish last ? He didn't spite Roxas for marring his face, but now that he took it into full consideration, he was a bit upset. But Roxas's apology made his afternoon a lot better. Feeling smug, he curled himself up into an incomplete circle, " Yeah ? Well, I forgive you for all've that. I kinda deserved it. " Then he paused and momentarily chuckled, " I-I want you back, too, Roxas ... I want you back. " More than anything in the world.
 
A rather large smile spread upon Roxas' features as he heard that Axel wanted him back as well. His heart was beating a million times a second and he couldn't help but laugh slightly, happiness spreading throughout his body, running down his veins. "Yeah, you kinda did deserve it, but now I have to stare at your black eye when we're together. It ruins your wonderful face."He said with yet another laugh. "But I don't mind, as long as we're together you could lose an ear for all I care." This was fantastic, he and Axel were a couple again and nothing could tear them apart, not even a stupid cheerleader whom Roxas still wanted to punch, but he'd cross that bridge when he came to it. "So...we're boyfriends again?" It wasn't really a question, it was a statement. It was something Roxas needed to say out loud to make sure it was true."I wanna see you." He wanted to hug Axel for so long and so tight that he practically exploded.
 
The bruise didn't hurt so much after he repeatedly pressed on it to numb the wound. He would have to put some antibiotics on the unsightly blemish to speed up the recovering process, but he would have to make Roxas do it for him. Like a baby, he always placed his head on his boyfriend's lap so Roxas could personally nurse his injuries. He was sort of a klutz, so he did fall and trip more often than the average person. And being part of a 'gang', it was embedded in his daily schedule for him to pick a fight with someone whenever his fists would feel itchy. He did claim the victorious position almost in all of his raw combats, but his triumph only left more bruises and cuts on his body afterward. After beating up a student he didn't like, he usually staggered into Roxas's embrace and left it in his care to disinfect his punctured lip or scratched cheek. Roxas, being his ultimate weakness, was the one who directly landed a punch below his eye, so it was his responsibility to mend it. After all, the kid did confess that he felt sorry for what he marked on his handsome face ... " So you're going to patch it up for me again ? " he asked with an ounce of hope, immensely touched at how forgiving Roxas was all of a sudden.

So was he finally going to put their differences and problems behind them ? Oh, he hoped so. They wouldn't be able to survive a full evening without each other, anyways. They were pathetic, really. What was the point of such a huge and dramatic break-up when they were going to crawl back to each other in a matter of a few hours ? Axel still couldn't believe how humongous of a gap Roxas left in his place, and now he realized how important the blond's existence was to him. " Boyfriends ? ... " he almost smirked, swinging both of his legs off to the side of the bed with a pleased exhale. He considered spiking back his hair again, but what was the point ? Roxas already saw him numerous times with his hair wet and messy unlike the rest of the human population. He never left his personal apartment without some sort of gel to hold up his hairstyle. " I prefer the term 'lovers', Roxy baby. ... Come over, then ? I was just about to order pizza. I can't step out of my door looking like this. " he murmured in slight shame, wishing that he looked decent enough as of right now to make like lightning to his lover's house.
 
A smile spread across his face as Axel asked him to patch up his bruise, much like he always did. He didn't like how Axel got into fights so often, but he couldn't stop the man from being in that...'gang' thing. If you could even call it a gang, it only had a handful of members, but that's what they considered themselves. "Yes Axel, I'll patch up my baby's wounds." He always had to take care of Axel whenever he got hurt, it was kind of cute actually and he didn't mind at all really. He liked to take care of the other male and tend to him, it made him happy. "Lovers, eh?" The boy said with a slight giggle. "Alright, we're not boyfriends, we're lovers." He said, confirming the other male's assumption. "Pizza?" He said excitedly, his stomach was growling at him to eat something, not having really eaten all day. "I'm on my way, love you." He immediately hung up and was putting on his shoes before he was in his car and on his way to Axels'. Roxas couldn't believe how much his day had turned around just from a simple phone call that hadn't even lasted five minutes. He was back with Axel and he was getting pizza, this may have just been the best day of the year for the young male.

He arrived at his lover's apartment about ten minutes later and knocked softly at the man's door. He hadn't changed at all since Axel saw him at school, besides his hair being slightly out of place from lying on his bed.
 
A wide grin crossed his lips as Roxas so willingly accepted the invitation over to his apartment and dinner. Even though it was just yesterday that they were making out on the couch, it seemed like forever that they were together. Axel couldn't even remember what happened in the early afternoon with this hysteric jumble involving a slutty cheerleader and a slightly insane boyfriend who beat the other because of some silly misunderstanding. This was how the world should revolve everyday, Axel decided. He didn't care if his future looked grim, because everything else didn't matter as long as he still had a part-time job and his Roxy baby to love. " All right ~ I'll see you later, Roxy baby- ... I love you, too ! " he crooned against his warm cellphone, flipping the device shut with an unmanly squeal. He didn't know he was capable of making such a noise, but who cared at this point ? Roxas was coming over, and Axel was still in his undergarments ! Well, that didn't really matter, because the two were actually very comfortable with being naked, too. Naked Roxas ... Axel daydreamed for a few seconds, placing his hands behind his head. The ceiling didn't look too bare, now. He imagined his lover on his side, clothed ever so slightly with a thin fabric as those luscious lips curved into a seductive smile ...

He was idiotically smiling while fantasizing a fabricated reality, his fingers threading through his own flamboyantly crimson hair. Ah, darn. Pizza ? He forgot that he didn't have his paycheck this week ... and he wasn't up for going to the mall to withdraw a few bucks. Then he would just have to make one ! Though Axel ended up burning everything he set his hands on, when it came to cooking, he was pretty skilled at it. After all, living alone for two years really trained you to feed yourself and not rely on anyone else. With a lazy gait, he walked over to his fridge and skimmed its contents, deciding that it wouldn't be too hard to make pizza out of scratch. Besides ... Roxas would like it. In ten minutes, he got to finishing the dough, his hands covered with flour. His nose was also dotted with the powder, because he itched it once during his kneading. As the doorbell rang, he enthusiastically opened it without any hint of awkwardness or anger expressed on his handsome features.

" Baby ! I'm so glad to see you, kid ! " he sneered, ruffling the other's blond hair with his flour-caked hand. He moved aside for Roxas to enter, proudly placing a hand in the middle of his chest. " I thought I make today's dinner special and actually bake the pizza myself. I'm even going to try something different with the toppings ... how about ... potato wedges ... Doritos ... ranch ... with a sweet potato-filled crust ? Hot sauce included, of course. " he grinned, totally excited about their evening together, " You are staying over, right ? "
 
As Axel answered the door, Roxas couldn't help but bite his lip to keep from laughing at the male, he looked a bit ridiculous. He was dressed in only his black silk boxers, his hair was down and he had flour on the tip of his nose and hands, which he now put all in Roxas's hair, causing the boy to groan. "Axeeeeeel..." He whined as flour fell to the floor from him shaking his head. "Now I'll have to take a shower later." He stood on his tiptoes and pressed a kiss to the redhead's lips. "You look wonderful, by the way. Kind of like a lifeguard, if you pretend the flower on your nose is sunscreen." The boy grinned as he stepped inside, happy to be back in Axel's apartment, even though he was just there yesterday. He took off his light jacket and placed it on the couch, now only wearing his shirt and jeans, taking his shoes off shortly after removing his jacket. As Axel explained that he would be making the pizza and listed off his rather...unique toppings, Roxas did all he could not to gag. "Axel, that sounds absolutely disgusting." The boy laughed, moving over to hug his lover. "I'm sorry babe, but potato wedges and Doritos? A sweet potato-filled crust? You're nuts." He smiled against his chest and placed a gentle kiss to it. "But I'll eat it just for you and of course I'm staying over, I always do when I come to your place." Roxas practically lived at Axel's apartment really, mostly going there after school and spending the night there, unless he had a test the next day. Axel and him got a bit too...'distracted' when they studied together and after a couple of tests that he failed, Roxas set up boundaries.
 
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