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Welcome to Atlantis Academy! (Lia && Chokuro)

"Don't wanna disappoint..." he muttered softly, yawning and settling further into the bed.

Arching an eyebrow, Calder looked over and shook his head. "He's not going to be disappointed, Tanner. He's your husband and he loves you." His friend just yawned again, not moving, and Calder could only look at Rune, shrugging.
 
Rune arched a brow before shrugging. He slid out of the bed and walked into the other room. He scooped up Relic and walked into the other room, laying his brother down beside Calder and Tanner, figuring if Calder was there, the other would not be too bad. He leaned over his brother and kissed his husband's head. "Help them both." He murmured and turned to leave, walking into his brother's room and collapsing into the bed with a yawn.
 
Tanner tensed when he felt Relic being put into the bed, and the blond scrambled out of it, and out of the room. He couldn't risk hurting Relic like that. Why couldn't anyone understand? Rushing downstairs to get away, the blond ended up in the backyard. Even though it was more open, he felt safer there. The blond curled up on the swing, trying to find a balance between what he wanted and not disappointing his husband.
 
Relic blinked a few times before he followed his husband into the yard. He let him have some space for a while then walked over to the other, sitting on the other swing. "Tanner..." he turned to look at him, sighing softly. "Go upstairs and sleep with Calder." He smiled lightly, head tilting to the side as he stared at him. "I ... I do not mind what you do... if it's spending nights beside Calder that will help you, then do it. But you know that I'm here for you, right? I just... I don't want you to think I am abandoning you or that I won't understand. I will. I do..."
 
Calder sighed and shook his head at his husband. "You can't do that, Rune. He has to work it out for himself, and we have to let him." The blond leaned up and kissed his lover's cheek as he walked downstairs to make himself a cup of tea. He was up now, and it wasn't likely he'd fall back asleep very easily.

Looking up, Tanner just shrugged at Relic. He knew that he had to explain himself, but it took him several long minutes to do so. "I... I just don't want to disappoint you," he answered softly. "If... If I sleep in the same bed with you tonight but can't tomorrow then... then you'll be sad."
 
Relic blinked a few times and smiled warmly, shaking his head a few times afterward. "Not at all. I will just be happy that you were comfortable enough o be with me." He began to swing back and forth, sighing gently. Looking over at him, he smiled some more. "I want you to take that step. Even if it means tomorrow you won't be in the same bed again, I will be happy that you did it once. You... You have been through a lot, love. I cannot expect you to do things how I would want them, or fast, or even completely the same... But whatever is best for you and will help you the most, I will be very happy with. Not disappointed. You haven't disappointed me... Ever."
 
He really couldn't believe that he wouldn't disappoint Relic. How could the other man not be disappointed? He was dirty and used and had gotten rid of a child... Tanner was disappointed in and disgusted with himself. The blond shook his head. "You deserve better," he answered just as softly as before, and twice as sincerely. His heart ached, and he buried his face into his hands, unable to deal with the emotions that were swirling around.
 
"Never!" Relic jumped up and instantly moved to his knees in front of the man. He looked up at him, eyes staying with his and he stared into those beautiful orbs. "I deserve you. I love you. Thick and thin. You do remember that I am a messed up guy who had sex with his brother, right?" he sighed softly and looked up at him. "We deserve each other. I can't leave you. I won't leave you. You're stuck with me forever more."
 
He shrugged once more, not really knowing what to say. Tanner felt horrible. Now everyone in the house was awake because of him. He should have just stayed in bed alone. That way no one's hopes would have been raised and he wouldn't be causing all this trouble. "Can... Can I go back to bed now?" Maybe if he went back to bed, everyone else would be able to, too...
 
Relic looked up at him and he stood up, nodding. "Do you want me to join you, or no? You can say no!" he added, wanting him to know that he was all right. He stood and held his hand to him with a smile. "Go sleep. if you want me to be there, or if you want to be with me, I will be in my bed, okay? Just know that... I may cuddle with you."
 
Tanner stood, thinking about it. The moment was past, for now anyway. He was too worried about disappointing Relic, and he'd over thought it by too much. The blond shook his head and moved to go inside. Tanner stopped, though, and paused to peck a very light kiss to Relic's cheek before continuing inside and upstairs to their room. He wanted to be better, and could only hope that he would be soon. But for now... Tanner knew that he just had to be patient, even if being patient caused him to feel horribly guilty.
 
Relic perked up at the kiss and he giggled happily. His hands rested on his cheeks as he bounced on the balls of his feet, giggling a little more. "okay! I'll be there soon." He grinned as he ran into the house - once Tanner was up the stairs - and ran over to calder, hugging him from behind. "He kissed me! My cheek. but he kissed me!!"
 
It was months later before Tanner was even close to feeling like himself. He felt bad, and guilty, but knew that he couldn't help feeling the way he felt. The blond still jumped whenever someone came into the room unexpectedly, and flinched when he wasn't expecting to be touched. But at least he was able to share a bed with his husband (most nights) and kiss him (if he was initiating it). And Relic had been so wonderful and understanding. Tanner didn't know what he would have done without him, or Calder or Rune or Jupiter.

Lying in bed, Tanner turned and pressed a kiss to Relic's neck, nuzzling the warm flesh. "Relic?" He'd put a lot of thought into what he was about to ask, and while he was scared out of his wits, Tanner knew that it would do more good than harm. Only after his husband replied did Tanner speak again. "I... I want you to top..." The words were barely whispered into the other man's neck, still afraid of the consequences of saying them, but knowing that he could trust Relic beyond anything.
 
Relic was so relieved. Tanner was getting better. Slowly yet surely, and that made the man so very happy. He loved his husband and let him know frequently that he still loved him and always would. not to mention the nights when he was with his love. IT was wonderful. Sleeping beside him, he sighed lightly. He loved when they slept together. It made his nights great. he could not explain just how giddy feeling him next to himself in bed made him.

Feeling the kiss, he giggled and then turned to look at him, only just making out the words. He leaned away and looked down at him, long lashes fluttering against his cheeks. He leaned away a little to look down at him, wanting to be sure he was serious. "r-really?" he moved away a little more, heart racing. "I ... I will. I really will and ... I will make sure you don't have any pain, okay? I want you to enjoy it." He stated, lifting his hand to slowly push through his blond locks. "You're sure you're ready, love?"
 
Close to tears, Tanner buried his head against Relic's chest and shook his head. He wasn't ready at all. "But I need you to..." He needed the safety and security to be associated with the act, instead of pain and fear. Somehow, he knew that it would help him to heal a bit further; it was a necessary step this time around. Tanner knew that Relic would care for him, and be aware of every movement. The blond looked up and pressed a soft kiss to Relic's lips. "I trust you."
 
Relic nodded and kissed his lips softly. "Okay. Then... I am going to tell you... I won't stop unless I think you truly cannot handle it, okay." He kissed him softly once more. He then leaned down and kissed him, beginning to slowly pull off his clothes "I love you." He whispered and kissed him a few more times, making sure to go slow enough that the other knew what was happening, but not enough where it was going to be too slow. He really wanted to make sure that this whole thing went off well for him.
 
Tanner hesitated for a moment before nodding. He was shaking, scared out of his wits, but he moved with Relic. He wanted to participate, not just lie there. The blond figured participating would help him a little bit more, too. Tanner's hands gripped at his lover's hips tightly, trying hard to relax as best he could.
 
Relic leaned down, kissing his jaw then his ear softly. "Hold me as tightly as you need, love." He whispered and then slowly began to slid his flesh into the other, after using enough lubricant where very little pain would happen." He moved within him, not caring about the pleasure, and wanting to have him enjoy this. He slid his fingers up his sides, trailing over his sides and keeping at a slow yet steady pace.
 
Large, soft tears began to fall even though Tanner had tried to hold them back. He knew it was Relic, that he wasn't going to be hurt. But he couldn't help but be scared. The blond buried his face into Relic's neck, breathing in his scent deeply. "Talk," he whispered. "Please... Need to hear your voice..." He needed his lover's voice and words to drown out the ones that were stuck in his head.
 
Relic smiled and kissed his cheek. "It's okay my love. I'll talk all you want." he smiled and began to tell the other how beautiful he was. How wonderful he was being. How brave. Any compliments that could come to mind, and a lot of times to tell him how much he loved him. "You are perfect, Tanner. No matter what happens. You are completely mine and you will never be anyone else's." He leaned down and kissed the crook of his neck, eyes closing while his hips continued moving.
 
He focused on the words and Relic's voice, and before long his body began to react to Relic's actions. Tanner gasped lightly as he held onto his husband, lips pressing to the sweat-moistened flesh. The blond wasn't sure what he'd done to deserve Relic, but he was positive that he wouldn't have survived without him. He stiffened as his orgasm hit, fingertips digging into Relic's (lovely) rear end.
 
Relic gasped softly, eyes fluttering closer and he let out a gentle groan. His hips pressed up and into his before he pulled out to release, figuring going inside would have made things worse. He slowly relaxed with a sigh and then looked up at his husband with a warm smile. "How are you? Are you okay? Need me to do anything? Bath?" He really was fussing over him.
 
Tanner waited for a few moments, allowing his racing heart to go back to normal. He held onto Relic as he did, trying to wrap his mind around what had just happened and associate it all with Relic and their marriage and love... It was still difficult. He shuddered softly as the cool air of the room hit his flesh and nodded. "We need new sheets," he whispered, crinkling his nose at the slick feeling beneath him. The blond pressed a kiss to his lover's lips. "I do love you," he whispered.
 
Relic smiled and kissed his lips back gently. "I love you too." He smiled and then leaned back a bit, eyes staying to his form. "You go shower. I will change the sheets." He giggled lightly and pecked his lips then leaned back once more. "Okay." He slid off the bed with a groan, arms stretching above his head ans he let out a little yawn. "Come on, love. Shower. I need to change them."
 
Wincing as he stood, Tanner pulled himself out of the bed and moved to take a shower. He felt dirty, but in a much different way than he had after everything had happened. He wasn't scared or in pain, and he knew that what they'd just done had helped him re-build the trust he had for Relic. Or, at least brought it out of its hiding place. The warm water felt good, and the blond was sure to wash himself properly, no matter how badly he cringed while doing so. Finally, he made his way back into the bedroom, wearing a pair of pajama pants and yawning.
 
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