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In the King's service (wolvenrogue and nightsorceress)

Robert held Aurora, as they watched her father sleep. He knew it was difficult for her to see him like this, so he did his best to reassure her that in the end it would all be for the best. In the morning, he would gather the other advisers and administrators who ran the kingdom, and advise them of the situation, buy for now, Aurora and Lilly were his main concern.
 
Aurora had so man things running through her mind. "I will step up and take over my father's duties for a time, until he is well enough to handle them on his own again, that way my mother can focus on him"
 
"Aurora do you think that is wise? i know it is your right if your father will allow it, but you have the children to care for. They are absolutely dependent on you, besides, the future of the kingdom will be in their hands. "
 
"I will have to keep the children close, but there really is no one else, and not this time of year, we will have people leaving to travel, we will have new people coming in, after all we are gypsy, for some of us travling is still important" She knew it was going to be a lot to handle but what choice did she have no one else could do what she could
 
" I was planning on helping your father," he said, his voice a bit disappointed. He knew he was certainly capable."But of course, it is not strictly my right to do so" he said. He had spent months basically being a made, he didn't mind it, he would do it again, but she was basically removing what he saw as his first opportunity in more tan a year to actually use his true talents. he tried hard not to be disappointed, but what she had just said hurt him, and it was hard to hide.
 
Aurora touched his cheek, "You have done so much already, for months you took care of me, and now my father, I just want to give you a chance to enjoy life, be a dad, plus part of me can't help but want to help here. After all i spent my whole life learning how to take my parents place, i feel like i would be failing them if i don't put to use what they taught me"
 
"Do you remember how you felt the day I treated you as a servant, after we we had fallen in love? he asked. He lowered his eyes and said no more. It wasn't his place. He now felt, for the first time, the full weight of the sacrifice he had made to be with her. He was faced with the fact that he was no longer in control of his future, it wasn't his to decide. " I will do my best to be a good father he said, But at this age I have little to offer that they need. I can't even feed them. They need you much more than me." He walked back into her room and sat quietly in the chair and looked over the children that he loved so much.
 
Aurora looked at him in amazement she was trying to give him some time to just have a few moments to himself. She followed him into the room. "Robert what is going on here, all I am trying to do is give you some time you have not stopped running and taking care of people since you got here, why should you be now the one to do this?"
 
" I don't have to be" he said " It is something I do well, it is what I was born to do, don't you see that?" I gave it up for you, something I don't regret at all, but I saw the opportunity to both have you and do what I was born to, as it might have been in my own kingdom, but here where you are happy, but now you want that duty as well as motherhood, which is difficult, and will take something from the children that I am at pains to replace. I have learned to be a servant, to take joy in manual work. To love helping people, but that does not mean I've forgotten how to lead and manage, or that I don't desire to use those talents. It is your decision to make, with the agreement of your father of course, since he is still alive, but I think you are making a mistake. What ever the decision, I shall abide by it. I know my place."
 
Aurora looked down, "I guess your statement of having to learn to be a servant is what is killing me now, i never wanted that for you, never." she sighed a little. "if my father needs help running this around here, why does it have to be me or you, why can't it be us"
 
"It can be" if that is how you want it. That's how it would have been in my kingdom, it would have been "us." But your father isn't gone yet, He doesn't need you, me, or us to take over , only to help. He is really still in charge. He still has his mental faculties. I just thought that it was a better choice for me to help him, since there is precious little I can do to help with the children, especially when it comes to feeding. In a year, it might be different. Anyway it isn't my decision it is yours. I have no more influence here in this kingdom, than you or your father choose to give me. In a very real sense, I am a servant. Just as you were in my kingdom. I am dependent on your love, just as you were on mine that day.
 
"I know he is not gone, and all i was saying is i help for a month or so until he is more confident with his walking, but if you want to handle it all that badly then have at it, i am not going to argue and i certainly do not want to make you feel like a servant, in fact trying to do the oppsite when I said i would help, trying to give you time to relax but that is fine you want to make a bigger deal out of this then it needs to be then fine" Aurora then left the room and went to her parents kitchen and began to cook she was so pissed off at Robert right now.
 
When she left, Robert just sat on the bed, he knew immediately that he had won the battle but lost the war. He got the work he wanted but now she was mad and had made it very obvious. She had appeased him, when what he wanted was understanding. At first he thought about trying to explain things to her, but he was afraid he would kust make things worse. He decided that if he got a chance he would ask Liam for some advice.
 
She did not know he had to be dramatic over something that did not need to be. She was trying to help. She just continued to cook not wanting to be any where near Robert for the moment.
 
As Robert sat in the aurora's old room thinking aboiut what had just happened, He realized how silly the whole thing was to begin with. He had planned to get advice form he father but as he thought about it, he didn't need it. He had let pride overcome his love for Aurora, and that was wrong no matter if he were right about the practical nature of things. He quietly left the house and went home where he found a vase. Then he went out to the woods and spent the better part of an hour picking the nicest wild flowers he could find and aranged them in the vase. He attached a note.

I'm sorry, please forgive me, I love you. Robert

When he had finished he quietly walked in her mother's kitchen where Aurora was working, and set the vase on the counter and walked out to the Living Room and sat down.
 
Aurora did not hear him enter the kitchen, but when she turned she saw the beautiful flowers. She didnt have to read the note to know who they were from but she did none the less and she smiled and went to find him. She saw him in the living room and she went to sit on his lap. "So are you done being stubborn" she teased
 
This was one time he didn't want to be teased. He struggled with his feelings. What had happened had honestly scared him and hurt his feelings, but he had made the choice to love her first and put his feelings second, having completely sacrificed the practical considerations. He had hoped she would have reached out more to him and understood what he was going through, but she didn't seem to understand. Her teasing, even if well intentioned, had rubbed salt in the wound. He said nothing and smiled weekly, and hugged her. How could she have chalked this up to simple stubbornness? He was a boiling pot of emotions he couldn't express. He was afraid to speak. As she sat in his lap, he just buried his face in her breast, and his shoulders began to shake. He tried to stop it with all his will, he desperately wanted to keep control, but it just spilled from his heart.
 
Aurora wrinkled her forehead when he said nothing, was he still upset with her and just trying to end a fight with the flowers. She felt him shudder against her as his face was buried in his chest, she pulled back a little "Robert what is the matter?"
 
Robert was afraid to speak, he had wanted desperately to put the hurt he was feeling behind him and get back to all of the wonderful feeling that they had enjoyed the last few weeks. He felt guilty for destroying them. he had lost the cold-heartedness he used to posses, that had let him get past such situations before. Right now he felt vulnerable. But most of all he didn't want to cause any more hurt. He looked down. Finally after more than a minute of total silence, he finally said the two words that summed up the root of the problem. he spoke them honestly and from the heart. "I'm scared" he said.
 
Aurora looked into his eyes for a long moment she was not sure what was going through his mind right now. every thing had been going so well and now this change in him. she had an idea what the root cause but was not going to say anything. "What are you scared of" she finally asked hoping he could be honest with her.
 
He looked at her and said "It doesn't make sense, I've never been happier, you know that." He looked down in silence a long minute before continuing, then looked in her eyes "but i just realized, that for the first time in my life, I have no control over my life, and though there is really nothing wrong right now, that scares me to death" . He buried his head in her breast again and just sobbed quietly. Lilly came down the stairs and turned the corner into the living room, and seeing the two as they were, gave her daughter a knowing look, and quietly went back upstairs, unnoticed by Robert.
 
Aurora bit her lip she feared this would happen. He was use to a different life then she and now it was catching up with him. She sighed and pulled away again. "Robert, life is more easy going here, slower paced and less to do. even my parents have very little to do, they don't collect tax, they don't pass laws, they don't hold court. They just pass out advice and are a symbol of order. I fear that maybe you are starting to miss what you life was, where you were always needed, and never had a moment to yourself"
 
Robert couldn't believe what he was hearing, It was so ironic to him. She was trying to analyze his feelings, just as he had hers before. "You really don't understand" he said " not at all". "I don't miss my kingdom, and your love is all that I need. Especially I don't miss taxes, and laws, and court, and God forbid politics!" But before, my path in life was of my own choosing, however misguided I might have been, and now that is no longer true. I don't even really miss that control, but not having it scares me to death."
 
Aurora looked at him puzzled and moved away from him. "Robert I don't understand what you are saying? you think your life here is dictated out for you? that you have no choices" she wondered where this all was coming from. just hours ago she thought he was happy now to hear this, she did not know hat to make of it
 
"I was afraid of this" he said. "its not your doing, and I know I have choices. Everyone has choices, even a servant. The difference is who grants the choices, As the king I granted my own. No one could take them from me. I was used to that. It was part of my thought process. Now I still have choices, but they are not only my own. There are others that can deny me those choices if they choose. I have never felt that before. How can i explain this. I don't even want to change it, but it scares me. Please try and understand. Right now that is what I need. This wasn't some silly game or powertrip I was playing. I just need ou to help me through it. It seems silly to you but its not. Try and remember what it was like to be a servant, even though I loved you and you knew it. It's the closest thing I can think of to what I'm feeling. please don't be angry with me right now."
 
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