A lot of people never realize the things that make a person really interesting and unique and worth knowing are usually the things that make them stand out in a crowd. The eccentricities, the quirks, the bizarre knowledge and odd skills. The stuff that makes you happy, even if nobody else gets it. Sometimes BECAUSE nobody else gets it.
You don't get to be a great storyteller at a party, for example, without experiencing things that make great stories, and the go-with-the-crowd, just-fit-in types rarely do that sort of thing. Their stories are about what everyone else does, except there was this really odd or unusual thing or person that happened. They don't get that they could be the odd or unusual person who has interesting stuff happen to them ALL THE TIME.
This is the problem with conformity: it's stifling. Creative, interesting people don't conform. They can, it's possible, but when they're doing the unusual thing they do, they choose not to. I think it's sad that your former friends chose group identity over individuality, Vespers. I bet they even think they're being individuals when they, I don't know, buy their "out there" clothes from the same store at the mall as everyone else in their crowd.
It would be useful if you learned how to work with different crowds so you could have the social interaction you crave, my dear, but you clearly don't want to sacrifice what makes you unique just to fit in. And you shouldn't. But just as I'm sure of that, I'm also reasonably sure you can't be the only person near you who's suffering from the same issues as you. Maybe you can figure out how to make your own crowd of similar interesting people? But that's entirely up to you and your motivations -- I'll just offer you a big e-hug and tell you I've been there, I understand, and reassure you that situations are not always as they seem when we're in the middle of them. That's supposed to give you hope that something unexpected could happen (because it always could, that's the point of 'unexpected').
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