"I do understand, but you're breaking down, I've seen it before and you're showing symptoms of someone who is having a panic attack.. Just calm down, everythimg will be perfectly fine." He assures her, stroking her hair with one of his hands. "I promise, I promise I understand, but keaving is not going to help you."
Her breathing was ragged, her chest heaving as she hyperventilated. Nothing was going right. She had a plan. There had always been a plan and it was all to shit now.
"He'll make me leave," she sobbed, dropping her head back into his neck, "Oh god Kevin, he's going to make me leave. I'll be stuck here forever."
She just wished they'd go away. She wanted to be held, she wanted Kevin to talk to her like he did behind closed doors, not like the Ghost he was in public. It felt so...formal, and it was driving her crazy. He was talking to her like she was a patient at a clinic, not like the man she was in love with.
He kisses the top of her head softly, just continuing to hold her as his words aren't seeming to calm her down. He feels her sobbing against his neck, causing him to hold her tighter against him, at this point he has lost control, and is unsure of how to calm her down.
"I never said you should leave, Agent, I asked you if you were ready to be a Ghost, and then you stormed out." Shrake calls out. "I'm offering you and Lion a place on the team, both of you are going back to the States."
Katerina heard him and blanched. Was she even allowed into the country anymore?
It took a lot of effort between Red, Shrake, and of course Kevin to calm her enough that she wasn't crying or screaming any more. Once she had settled enough to move off the roof, they took her downstairs to eat lunch, hoping food would ease everything else. Digging up those memories had brought back all the pain and fear from years ago, leaving Katerina's tough skin she had grown to deflect people broken. Her normally cocky attitude was replaced with silence, as she sat and listened, never speaking. Her mind just went over everything again and again, regretting every second she had spent in the cartel.
After the team had eaten, Shrake motions for Katerina and Lion to follow him into his office. He sits down in his chair and looks over the two, cautiously eyeing them,
"So I've gotten you both screening permissions to join Ghost Recon, it'll take you are four months of hardcore special operations training within the United States, and both of you are subject to dismissal from the program at anytime Drill Sergeant Farnsworth thinks you aren't ready." He says to the two of them.
"So Agent Katerina and Jordan Rodriguez, you both have been selected to take part in Ghost training.. Or you will be deported back to your original country and told to forget this ever happened you.. Your choice." He says to the two adults in front of him.
Wow. What a choice. Either I become a ghost or I get stuck in this shit hole for the rest of my life. Fuck Kevin is going to hate this. I'm going to hate this. 4 months?
She had little choice, and after her breakdown she still wasn't ready to speak. Kat simply nodded and continued to stare down at her hands.
"Alright, the helicopter that will take you to the airport will arrive tomorrow, enjoy a little time while you're still here in this hellhole." He says to them before motioning for them to leave the office.
Jordan leaves the office and waits for Katerina, when she finally exits he begins to talk to her excitedly.
"Wow, I can't believe we're going to become professional badasses.. This is so awesome!" He says excitedly, almost as if he cannot contain his excitement,
As he chatted away she walked beside him, silent and depressed. She couldn't forget those awful memories she'd dredged up. And now she was losing Kevin for four months.
Life felt like shit.
Kat's eyes were clouded and gloomy, not even quite sure where she was walking but knowing Lion was the only happy one out of the two of them leaving.
He waves her goodbye and breaks off to walk to Arya's room, knocking on the door and waiting for the doctor to answer, excited to tell her the news.
For some odd reason, he believes she's the only one who won't go off on him for just talking, other than Red of course, but he was sort've annoying with his optimistic attitude.
Kat continued walking, somehow finding her way to her room. She shuffled in, shutting the door with her foot and flopping on the bed. While Lion seemed excited, she felt like it was another punishment. They'd be gone for four months. The rest of the team would still be working, just without them.
Arya was sitting at her desk, reading her book. At a knock on the door she called that it was open, greeting Lion as he stepped in.
"Hi. Sorry to interrupt, this is the last time I'll be able to speak to you for four months." He says to her. "Shrake is getting Katerina and I screened for Ghost Recon training, and I just wanted to ask you what it was like, and what to expect, all of that stuff." He says to the doctor.
She put her book down, gesturing to him to find a seat. A least he was eager. Once they were both comfortable she answered all of his questions, talking well through the afternoon.
"Alright, thank you Arya, I'm gonna get some rest before I leave tomorrow.. I'll see you in four months." He says to the doctor, standing up and collecting himself before nodding to her, turning to walk out of the room.
She couldn't help but laugh at his formality, saying he'd see her in four months like it would be tomorrow. She had tried to explain it best she could, but honestly? They were both about to get their asses handed to them.
Kat rolled over, staring up at the cieling. At some point she needed to tell Kevin. But tell him what? That she was leaving? That it be four months? Or more specifically it be four months without him.
Katerina could do nothing but wait now, wondering when Winters would come find her. She already had everything packed, and she'd gotten a few hours of a nap in too.
Winters goes off guard duty, walking downstairs to his room and opening the door quietly, unsure if Kat was inside, which she happened to be. He silently closes the door and sits down in one of the stray chairs of the room, taking his boots off carefully.
He pads over to the bed and slips into bed next to her, wrapping his arms around her and resting his head against hers. He closes his eyes and tries to get some sleep.
Katerina's voice is soft, trying to wake him up. When he had come into the room he had been quiet, most likely thinking she was asleep. But after the nap she had had she was wide awake. Still, Kat had let her lover sleep for a couple hours, reading a book while wrapped in his arms, trying to distract herself. When she could wait no longer she whispered his name, trying to wake him.
His eyes open slowly, he nuzzles against her head. "What is it?" He whispers to her, still half asleep as he was having a good dream, his body almost didn't want to wake up, but the call of his lover was more important than his energy.
There was no easy way to put this, without upsetting him, "Shrake's sending me to the States for training. It, uh...well, I'm going to be gone for four months."
He is still half asleep, the words not hitting him as hard as they should be. "Ohh, well.. Have fun." He says with a yawn before blinking. "Four months, huh? It'll be hard without seeing you everyday.. But I guess missing you will only make love stronger." He says, sighing against her skin as he starts to fall asleep again.
She sat up, staring down at him. He almost sounded like he didn't care, but it had to be sleepiness. Kevin cared. She knew that.
"Please handsome," she shook him harder now, "We need to talk about this. I don't want to spend my last hours with you sleeping. I'm leaving in the morning. That's not even twelve hours from now. Kevin...baby wake up!"
He jumps and rubs his eyes. "Okay okay.. I'm awake." He says before yawning again. "Sorry, long day and all of that.. What else do you need to talk about? I understand that you're going away but this is a good thing, you'll finally be on the team, we just gotta separate for a little while, I'll miss you and you'll miss me but once we're together again it will be even more lovely than it is now." He says to her, grabbing her hand while he speaks.
She gazed at his face, hoping for a bit more of a reaction. But it wasn't there. He didn't seem to mind being alone for four months. A part of her felt a little stung by that, wanting to see him get upset over her departure. Another part was thankful, he was making this easier for her.
"What if I come back and your dead?" she mumbled, intertwining her fingers in his, "What if something happens? I'm...scared. Scared that this might be a longer goodbye than it feels like it is."
Her fingers rubbed up his arms to his chest, feeling the muscle underneath the cloth, "I have to get four months of your touch in. I have to memorize the smell of your hair and the way your muscles ripple when I massage your back. God Winters, this is going to be a long ass four months."
He nods. "Kat, you and I both know and understand that getting killed is in the job description, if it comes down to it, I will lay my life down for anybody on this team, and I know they will do the same for me, that's what being a Ghost is about." He says to her quietly.
He enjoys the feeling of her hand on his chest, he sighs and sinks into the bed at her touch. "It will be a long four months, but this is a chance you will never have again, and I'm.. Happy for you." He says to her quietly, not wanting to wake up anybody in the rooms around them.
He was right, and she knew that, but it still sucked to be losing the connection she'd grown with him, even if it was for only four months.
She bent over him as he sunk down, her lips leaving hot kisses down his jawline to his ear, her teeth grazing the lobe as she whispered, "You are right baby. I'm still going to miss you. And I'm not letting you sleep tonight. If I'm going four months without your touch, damn it I want every inch of you tonight to tide me over."
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