Difficult and uncommon kinks to find partners for

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

As far as labeling goes, I'm not sure. I will admit that I search people's posts looking for how they write. I used to ask for writing samples but 1. I feel like that is really condescending, just right off the bat but also 2. people tend to lie, or they, paradoxically, don't put forth a good effort in it. Here I am asking for them to sell themselves and they give me something that they admit "isn't their best work" or it's something they're not interested in doing anymore or what have you. So, I secretly look at posts, to get a feel for their voice. Post length is a load of crap when it comes to determining quality, because you can have a post several pages long and it says nothing, it's boring, or it lacks coherence, then what was the point of all those words. So, mostly I look and see if what I read, even in an rp I'm not a part of, if it is interesting/fun/entertaining to read.

Writing samples are tough because... sometimes their just so forced.
I think it'd be better to have a conversation and ask them stuff and see how the write out their answers.
But making someone write a sample just so they can write with you... I mean, it's an rp partner search not a job application... so yeah, it's rarely going to bring in a good sampling.


Post length, I could go on lengths about this... part of a reason I've started to like chat rps since they are fast paced... I get sick of certain places where people write paragraphs upon paragraphs... if I want to read, I'll read a book. If I want to write that much, I'll work on a novel. What I want is character interaction.
And I find the intense phobia of one-liners to be kind of irritating. I've caught flak for this a LOT in my day, but I always posted them because things needed a quick sentence to advance things... anything else would have been padding. I hate padding.

Some day I want to do a CHALLENGE RP where people are limited to one sentence of actions, one sentence of thoughts/feelings, and a normal conversation line of dialogue, i.e. the usual length of what you'd say in a conversation before breaking off for responses (not this ridiculous thing you get in rp's where people have several conversation threads going on at once...)

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More on topic, I think my difficulty is I don't really have any real On's and Off's (well... certain scenarios appeal to me, but that's it). So I feel that makes me too... generic for most people, since I'm not really into a lot of their stuff, and I don't have a lot of my own specific interests for them to build around.
Probably because I like just... roleplaying with sex added in, rather than specifically wanting a particular kink in the roleplay.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

if I want to read, I'll read a book. If I want to write that much, I'll work on a novel. What I want is character interaction.

Snipped your post because THIS^^^ So much! I've always been a bit wordy when writing and for a while, that was the important part. I used to have an rp where we'd have 3 points of view going on in one post and it'd be 30 pages in MS Word(standard formatting). Even controlling 3 different characters all at once, that's way too much for just one post. You're kind of forcing your partner to not only take an hour or more to read the entire thing but then read it again enough to latch onto the relevant details and respond. And the in-role-play time that passed for the entire length of 30 pages = 15 minutes tops.

I think instead of focusing on post lengths, people should focus more on the interaction between characters. Even if you go a bit lengthier, that's fine, but don't go off writing internal stuff that probably has little to no current impact on what is happening. I said in the other thread and I'll say it again here, I personally feel there has to be a balance between how long it takes your partner to read the post and how much time in the role-play has actually passed, with characters talking and doing things and thinking about things. If it takes you 30 minutes to read my post and in the actual role-play, only 5 minutes have passed, it's not good. You've bogged it down to the point where both characters are just standing there staring at each other while yours sits and thinks about everything.

Because honestly, what is the point? You're not writing just to read yourself talk. You're writing to articulate a point, you're trying to communicate. If you get that in a sentence or two, all the better, because it cuts out all the fluff that chokes the flow and the pacing. And really, we're coming together, two people(or more, for groups) trying to live through a fantasy together. That's the point.

Whatever anyone wants to do, they can do, after all, rping is about what you like to do and what fits your preferences. This is just my personal take on it, that I'd prefer, instead of my partner feeling obligated to "match" my posts for some odd reason and adding a bunch of thoughts and padding that the current action could have done better without, just write a paragraph that moves it forward. It's like tennis. When I swat the ball over to you, I do not want to stand there while you bounce the ball in the air with your racket. I'd like you to swat it back to me so we can keep going.

I'd love to see a challenge rp. I think that there is a fine art and skill to being able to restrain yourself, to keep from word diarrhea, and to get the absolute perfect descriptions of actions, dialogue and internal narrative in as few sentences/words as possible. I think it'd give the words themselves more impact, more power, because at that point, you can't hide behind frivolous impressions or memories that could/could not provide context for your character. It's right there, what they want, what they're doing, what they're saying and where they're at.

As for the ons and offs thing, I'm the same way. I've done everything from indepth training BDSM dom/sub rps to futanari and tentacle monsters. Although kink is interesting, not when you get all "rules" with it, which, unless you're doing a strict dom/sub relationship, don't really matter as much. As I've described in this thread, my kinks run more contextual. I like drama and emotion more than anything; sex is very basic, while going up and down the entire scale of gender and sexuality. Which is why I made this thread, honestly.

Also, welcome to the forum, Outside!

 

[nanachan]

Not exactly hard, but my adultery fettish gets very polarizing reactions. Some people would love it a lot and some would refuse me outright (and calls it disgusting). I just really like the taboo of it and the idea that my character, who believes her lover to be the absolute best lover she can have, ends up finding someone sexually superior. I think it's easier to find guys who are into it than girls, it kinda strokes someone's ego when they hear the wife/fiancee/lover of another man (double points if it's their mortal enemy) scream about how much better their cocks are compared to the other man's

 

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

Another angle of why I struggle with post length is probably, I didn't start roleplaying online by freeform writing, I started with tabletop games. So when it's my turn to post, I tend to treat that post basically as a D&D round... i.e. THIS is what my character is doing this six seconds... unless you go really overboard, that's never going to be more than a paragraph.

Dialogue is a tough thing, since, it's hard to emulate real conversation online (at a tabletop, you can still talk over each other like normal).

And huge post lengths might not be so bad if I got more OOC talk in between them, but that's another thing I rarely, rarely get (at one point, I made a bunch of friends because I started hanging out in their OOC thread, simply because it was super active and I'd been rping with a couple of them in other rps).

And again, that comes back to the idea that for me, roleplaying is predominantly something I do for social interaction.

I'd love to see a challenge rp. I think that there is a fine art and skill to being able to restrain yourself, to keep from word diarrhea, and to get the absolute perfect descriptions of actions, dialogue and internal narrative in as few sentences/words as possible. I think it'd give the words themselves more impact, more power, because at that point, you can't hide behind frivolous impressions or memories that could/could not provide context for your character. It's right there, what they want, what they're doing, what they're saying and where they're at.

Yeah. Especially because I think the deal with the one-liner is, often they're just bad.

"Yeah," said Bruno. "That's cool."

That literally adds nothing.

It'd also be fun to see people try to cram as much as they could in a single sentence without it becoming a run-on. The Challenge RP would very stupidly strict about grammar and punctuation.

As for the ons and offs thing, I'm the same way. I've done everything from indepth training BDSM dom/sub rps to futanari and tentacle monsters. Although kink is interesting, not when you get all "rules" with it, which, unless you're doing a strict dom/sub relationship, don't really matter as much. As I've described in this thread, my kinks run more contextual. I like drama and emotion more than anything; sex is very basic, while going up and down the entire scale of gender and sexuality. Which is why I made this thread, honestly.

Also, welcome to the forum, Outside!

Yeah. And for me... even stuff that's more mentally engaging to me... stuff I'd want to do IRL... I'm never going to get turned 'on' just by roleplaying. Unless I find someone that I super click with, maybe. But I get the feel most other people *do*.


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Here's a flipside for people that do non-sexual roleplay (though this could apply to some sexual roleplays as well). Do you ever have an element you want to include but feel it'd get seen as too "fetishy" even though that's not what you're going for?
I kinda feel this way about futanari. It's not something I see as weird to have a girl with a penis, anymore than having a man with a penis if I felt like playing a male character... it's not a fetish, just a trait, no more than selecting a hair color or cup size (I mean, those can be fetishes but they're not usually seen as such).
I guess my point is, if it was a sex rp, I wouldn't want them to think me giving my female character a dick would be a theme I want to dominate the rp, and on the other hand, in a non-sexual rp, I wouldn't want to the fact that my female character has a dick to come across like I have the intention she's going to be whipping it out at some point and trying to turn a clean roleplay into something NSFW.

In many ways, it could extend to any sexual trait your character might have... sometimes I want to play hypersexual characters because, that's just the character that's on my mind... and the desire to not have to suppress, hide, or gloss over my characters' sexualities it what brought me to seek more adult roleplaying sites... but then that brings me to the occasions when, sometimes I want that, but don't want to spend a lot of focus on sex scenes and don't want it to be a means to my personal arousal.

And such is my crux of strange wants.

As a side note, it's probably why I prefer group roleplays for stuff like this, since I can dial out and in as I feel the need to.


((Also, thanks!))

 

[Rudolph Quin]

Here's a flipside for people that do non-sexual roleplay (though this could apply to some sexual roleplays as well). Do you ever have an element you want to include but feel it'd get seen as too "fetishy" even though that's not what you're going for?
I kinda feel this way about futanari. It's not something I see as weird to have a girl with a penis, anymore than having a man with a penis if I felt like playing a male character... it's not a fetish, just a trait, no more than selecting a hair color or cup size (I mean, those can be fetishes but they're not usually seen as such).
I guess my point is, if it was a sex rp, I wouldn't want them to think me giving my female character a dick would be a theme I want to dominate the rp, and on the other hand, in a non-sexual rp, I wouldn't want to the fact that my female character has a dick to come across like I have the intention she's going to be whipping it out at some point and trying to turn a clean roleplay into something NSFW.

In many ways, it could extend to any sexual trait your character might have... sometimes I want to play hypersexual characters because, that's just the character that's on my mind... and the desire to not have to suppress, hide, or gloss over my characters' sexualities it what brought me to seek more adult roleplaying sites... but then that brings me to the occasions when, sometimes I want that, but don't want to spend a lot of focus on sex scenes and don't want it to be a means to my personal arousal.

Interesting questions to bring up because I do think, despite the overwhelming focus a lot of req threads put on "story" and plot over smut, I'm not sure if that means it's excluded from the expectation entirely. Most people when they come here do come for the sex, so, it'd be interesting to see how difficult it is for those who do not, to find a partner.

Futanari is probably not a good example for that, simply because it does describe, in English speaking countries, and has strong associations with a genre of Japanese hentai games and manga. It IS a highly sexual word for its associations and simply for its accepted meaning. I, personally, would expect the dick to be used if the person identified their character as futa instead of just transgendered. I think that transgendered people can be sexualized but as their visibility grows in the media and popular culture, there's this strong focus on them as individuals and actual people. So, it'd still have the connotations of "woman with a dick" if she's pre-op, without being as fetishized or exploiting that expectation for penis sex; anybody who is aware of the intricacies of the trans community, know that some/a lot of transwomen transition out of a discomfort with their bodies, so, a focus on the genitals they don't identify with might actually be insensitive. Futanari, to me, does not have that individuals clout just because of the way the word is used and where it comes from.

I think a lot of Japanese words have that association, especially when over here, they're used mostly to refer to a genre or theme in porn. I think a better example of "want to do this adult themed thing but focus on the non sexual and individual themes" is lesbianism or any kind of homosexual relationship. IRL they're not a fetish, they don't dominate as a fetish, but a group of individuals who all share a certain trait in who they are personally attracted to. The associations are very strongly human and individualistic. However, a lot of times, you put MxM or FxF in your req thread or say "Our characters will be in a lesbian relationship" there will be a strong expectation for sex to occur. Nobody does it to be intentionally disrespectful or erasure but it is just a plot theme to denote a sexual pairing here. That would be a more analogous "not sexual irl associations but sexualized here and thus would make it difficult to focus on the nonsexual aspects" example, imo. Bottom line: it would be misleading to put a futanari in an rp but say you don't want sex to be immediately expected/at all. It would not be misleading to do so for a homosexual relationship, although it would still be difficult to find people willing to do it for nonsexual story, simply because of its associations as a sexual pairing within the adult rp community.

 

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

Futanari is probably not a good example for that, simply because it does describe, in English speaking countries, and has strong associations with a genre of Japanese hentai games and manga.

This is part of it, and hence I don't use that term because that'd certainly get that kind of response.
If in the character profile under gender I put "intersex" it doesn't usually call attention, but I still wonder about it sometimes.

 

[ShadowsLitany]

Not exactly hard, but my adultery fettish gets very polarizing reactions. Some people would love it a lot and some would refuse me outright (and calls it disgusting). I just really like the taboo of it

That's how one of my current rp's started as an adultery, though it also had the added attraction (I guess you might say) of breast milk and pumping as well. The adultery started with aiding the pumping and went on from there.

Breast Milk was not my thing, but my partners, but I guess that could be considered a bit of a difficult fetish (as my partner had not had anyone willing to do it until we worked it in)...and thankfully she worked in my clothes fetish. Now its costumes, which works for me, so I guess talking about it gets you there!!

I'd love to see a challenge rp. I think that there is a fine art and skill to being able to restrain yourself, to keep from word diarrhea, and to get the absolute perfect descriptions of actions, dialogue and internal narrative in as few sentences/words as possible. I think it'd give the words themselves more impact, more power, because at that point, you can't hide behind frivolous impressions or memories that could/could not provide context for your character. It's right there, what they want, what they're doing, what they're saying and where they're at.

I am on the fence with paragraph length rp's, some people can do it and give you everything you need in a paragraph, some can do it just as badly as someone who writes 3-5 and still tells you nothing. It's all about the writer, you can either get what you want in the size box you have, or you can't. Pertinent details only, or added detail to set scene, it depends on the rp.

I love that challenge idea though, be able to do something useful in one sentence would be interesting. Definitely not easy though.

 

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

I suppose another one is, and this I don't think is too hard to find if one asks for it, perhaps, it's just not something I see a lot when browsing... but I get the feel most people are too "serious" for my tastes, and I a bit silly for theirs.

I always tend to a more whimsical, comical tone in any RP I seek, possibly because it's easier for me to write when I can include clever wordplay in my descriptions, and in sex scenes especially, when I can use more... colorful... metaphors for what's going on.

Not that I won't do darker works, just that those would fall under "black comedy".

 

[darkangel76]

Been out of the loop on this thread for a bit due to being away on vacation, so lots of GREAT reading to catch up on here. I have to say there's been some great additions. : )

That said, some further thoughts from me. XD I'd like to jump onto the gore and violence wagon. I'm definitely one for adding that into my RPs when and where appropriate as I really adore darker themed (even into the realms of horror) RPs overall. A lot of people get squicked out by gore OR they have no idea how to properly approach it, thus kind of botching up execution and/or a slew of other things. That or they just plain don't want to even 'go there'. As such, it's harder to find people who truly appreciate the genre and ideas and even harder to find a means to play them out well.

Another thing I'd like to add to the above statements made regarding character personalities (more or less, : ))--meaning how characters should have motivations or at least some kind of 'something' to add to the plate--is that I totally get this. I'm actually going to bring this into the whole Dom/sub deal because you'd be amazed at how many people truly believe that a sub has no mind and thus your character should be a brainless twit. @_@ How silly (and misinformed) this notion is!!!

Still another... though I'm not really into the whole incest thing as a whole--mainly because I just find most storylines that use the concept on the boring side (possibly due to what I've seen thrown out there? Who knows!)--there are some exceptions for me. I've learned that there are instances in either fantasy or scifi or even historicals where I'll venture into this concept, however I do have my own personal limitation on siblings.

Lastly, one of my touchiest--but this doesn't mean I won't use it--is rape. I think I have it listed as either a 'no' or a 'maybe' (I'd have to check, LOL!). Thing is, I don't like rape to be the sole crux of my RPs. It's ok as a plot device or something that might allow a character(s) to grow in some way whether or not the event is even successful. But, I'm not one to have a RP where it just revolves around that kind idea over and over again.

 

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

Have to admit I can't begin to understand the D/s dynamic, at all.

 

[darkangel76]

Honestly, the D/s dynamic is so warped by so many that I'm hardly surprised. And this is no fault of yours either. It's because there's so much BAD info out there that it's just really really sad. Firstly, it's unique to EVERYONE. To say there's a 'set way' is just ludicrous. Sure, there are common themes that you'll see, but there's no right or wrong. EVER! And because we're people, the variety you'll see from one end to the other is pretty much limitless. It's a glorious rainbow of, well, everything. : ) Personally, I'm in what's known as the realm of the submissive. But, what irks me to no end is that a lot of people think that this means you have no mind of your own, no goals, no aspirations, no drive, no nothing. This could not be farther from the truth. But personal nonsense aside, I also write submissive/submissive-leaning characters. They don't always have to be. I'm quite fine writing characters that are more on equal footing, if you will, in the bedroom and all that jazz. But regardless of that, they'll still have a head on their neck and that organ in their skull that, you know, functions and allows them to actually think for themselves. XD Doesn't matter if they're submissive or closer to the vanilla end of the deal. If that makes any sense. Nothing more obnoxious than when people think that submissive = lifeless dumbfuck. LOL! XD HOWEVER........I HAVE seen people prefer that role. But, good for them. I don't fall along that mark on the spectrum of things. >///<

 

[Mr Quixotic]

Been out of the loop on this thread for a bit due to being away on vacation, so lots of GREAT reading to catch up on here. I have to say there's been some great additions. : )

Another thing I'd like to add to the above statements made regarding character personalities (more or less, : ))--meaning how characters should have motivations or at least some kind of 'something' to add to the plate--is that I totally get this. I'm actually going to bring this into the whole Dom/sub deal because you'd be amazed at how many people truly believe that a sub has no mind and thus your character should be a brainless twit. @_@ How silly (and misinformed) this notion is!!!

I think it's been a very interesting conversation, DA.

Just to add to the D/s, and character personality comments; I totally agree with you on that the notion of a 'Sub' being a brainless twit is misinformed and stupid. Though the relationship dynamic itself isn't my cup of tea (for reasons expressed elsewhere on the boards), that doesn't mean i've no interest in BDSM practices. I also don't believe that being 'submissive' means a lack of personality, or possession of independent desires, and ability to think/act for themselves.

When I refer to submissiveness, I generally refer to it in the dictionary-defined, adjective sense:

"ready to conform to the authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive," rather than as a noun.

Although I know many people who use it as an adjective, don't actually mean it as it's stated above, I can't help but think, "Why use a word, if you don't mean it as it's defined."

I think a lot of times, what I'm looking for is misinterpreted possibly because I tend to make distinctions that other people don't, and whilst they're very clear (and logical) in my own mind, they're difficult to express in a way that people interpet in the same manner as I do.

In regards to my original post, and to attempt to clarify that it's totally separated from any type of D/s dynamic, per se, what I'm referring to are characters who come into the story with their own independent motivations, which form an integral part of the plot. Too often, I find that stories are based entirely around the male's desires, or "what his task is in the story";

- To seduce her
- To dominate her
- To rape her
- To lust after her
- To bimbofy her
- To take advantage of her

Whilst I'm happy to write any of those out, the majority of requests I receive commence with the other person telling me "what they want to see happen to their character", and what my comments boil down to is that along with that, I'd also like them to come in with "something that their character wants" (and will take action in an attempt to achieve).

Much of that has to do with my need for context, and direction. A story, for me to wrap my head around it, needs to contain a purpose for the character's. Whilst it may then shoot of in completely different, and unexpected directions, I require that focus to begin with.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

I think it was pretty clear from our conversation right on this thread what you meant, Quix, but thank you for the elaboration. It's all a matter of preference anyway, so, it's not a big deal. Anybody disagrees with you(which is someone you don't want to rp with if they do) then they don't have to rp with you. There are partners out there for everyone and this thread is specifically about those things that we want to rp or ways we want to write but are difficult to find people that mesh with us/desire the same things.

Not to chide anyone; I just want to make it clear and leave it open for those who haven't weighed in yet to also add their voice. Maybe they have something that was already listed and they can bring more light to their personal experiences of why it's hard to find partners for that. Maybe they'll find a partner to mesh with right in this thread because we finally say it, finally get it out in the open "this is something I want to do but it's tough because nobody else does".

 

[darkangel76]

I totally get what you're saying Quix. And I'm not always in the mood for what people deem a typical D/s plot myself. Most of the time, we just hash out a story and the characters fall how they may. Mine tend to be submissive, but not the kind that are taken advantage of wholly or however. It'll be dependent on plot really. But it's rarer than not for her to be just some twit (ok, mine would never be a twit, hehe) who lets someone do everything in every way. Hehe. Hard to explain. lol!!! XD Dont you just love how it's so clear in your head but the words only botch up the image!? >.< Anyway, one of my faves to sorta do, but can be difficult to find people to RP with and/or well with is something along the lines where my submissive character is like a Lady MacBeth. I'm fortunate to have one such going right now. But it's amazing how few enjoy that kind of character development. : )

Sweet convo people! This is why I <3333 BMR!!! Like Quin said, hopefully more will join in. That would be grand. : )

 

[Mr Quixotic]

Knowing exactly what I'm thinking, and why, but attempting to articulate it that same way to others can sometimes be the bane of my existence, DA. It's a large part of why my damn story posts take so long to compose; putting my thoughts into words on a screen is like trying to complete a jigsaw puzzle.

I totally get that. I did actually have a D/s plot just started with someone I'd wanted to write with for quite a while. It took us about six months to come up with something, as originally our preferences seemed too far apart, but eventually we found that we actually had a lot in common, in that it was the development of the character's, and the journey each underwent, that we were both most interested in, as well as a shared enthusiasm for some particular scenarios. Unfortunately, my partner hasn't been online in a month, but I'm hoping she'll return at some stage to continue.

Edit: And to get the ball rolling on possibly another one. Older women? It's not actually a kink of mine, and can't say that I've ever requested it, but I'm sure that there's a few guys (I've read threads!) who are into older women/younger guy, and I'm thinking that would be one which was very difficult to find?

 

[darkangel76]

XD I know that feeling. Then throw in the fact that breathing and everything else under the sun distracts me and....well, this is why I can take anywhere from a day to months to post myself. >.< But I like to think that when all is said and done, once I get the post pieced together it was worth the wait. I hope? MEEP! Well, I wishfully think that anyway...to make myself feel a bit better. >///<

That's cool you found someone who was able to do a decent D/s plot with you in a way that sated you cravings as well as theirs. Here's to hoping they return quickly!! Also, it's nice to hear that a good D/s story is being attempted. Most are just formulaic or I find my writing partner pulling odd nonsense where it's just their character abusing mine over and over and most of the time nonconsensually and, erm, that isn't what I sign up for with those sorts of stories. I don't like that as the main focus. At all. Blargh!! To explain it!! Lol!! XD

 

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

Edit: And to get the ball rolling on possibly another one. Older women? It's not actually a kink of mine, and can't say that I've ever requested it, but I'm sure that there's a few guys (I've read threads!) who are into older women/younger guy, and I'm thinking that would be one which was very difficult to find?

This is usually the kind of hentai I read, but it's not something I'd ever be interested in roleplaying.

Anybody else like that? Stuff I'm interested in roleplaying, stuff I like in erotica I read, and stuff I'd actually want to do for real are almost all completely different.

 

[darkangel76]

I think this is true for most, at least for a lot of the things we write anyway. I mean, I wouldn't want to actually kill my husband as an example. lol. Nor would I gain any pleasure in him actually eating me alive. So clearly there's a dissociation there somewhere. But that doesn't mean I don't like to write about those things and I love reading such things and watching movies/anime that venture into such topics as well.

I've broached RPs where my character was the older woman. It's not something I'm fond of myself, but I can see the appeal. I did one where my character was the older sister by a couple of years and her brother had gone away to fight in a war in a French Revolution Era type deal. He came back after his sister had been evacuated to England and he joined her there. They trusted no one, had been close growing up and upon seeing her grown up realized his feelings for her had somehow changed, likewise hers had as well. She seduced him, but in the end he quickly turned the tables on her and soon it was he who was the more dominating force. But the main crux was that they were in a strange land where they trusted no one but each other.

 

[g.stevens11]

Regarding the older woman idea, I have issues with finding people willing to do that.

Whenever I play, I like a balance. Some younger characters, but some older. For some reason, rare is the person who's willing to go much above 50 for a character's age.

What's with the obsession with youth? It's a little....dull.

Why not have a character that's, let's say, 68.

Plenty of real life people that age are still virile. Yet, ask a potential partner about it and they almost have an asthma attack.

 

[AndNich123]

I will play the older woman in some rps, but it all depends on the plot. In one rp I play the mother who is not only having sex with her brother, whom she’s also married to, but she has just recently started having sex with their son as well. I actually have to incest rps going where I play the mother. In other rps, the character isn’t someone so young they just barely meet BMR’s age guidelines. The character is an adult. Now to rp someone who is say in their 40s, no. I haven’t done that. Would I? Again it would depend on the plot.

As for the typical D/s plots, when I started here, I was very much into them. Now they seem so limiting in what a character can do. When you’re tied down, gagged, and mindlessly following the orders of someone, there’s only so much you can do. Now to have someone around that the character enjoys taking instructions from is different for me. I can do, and it also leaves the door open for the character to not obey. It provides some character growth as she, or he as the case may be, not only begins to depend on the other person, but they find a certain joy in serving. That falls along the same lines as a real life D/s relationship can be. You find pleasure, happiness, in serving someone else. The characters can go from hating and fighting it, to find some sense of inner peace in doing it. Hardcore, heavy D/s rps just don’t do it for me anymore.

We all rp certain things we wouldn’t do in real life. With all the incest rps I’ve done , I can assure you I do NOT want my brothers or father. Still there’s a certain attraction to it. Now as for a dominating man, there are certain aspects of that, that I do crave in real life. I’ve got a rp where the young girl is trapped in a man’s basement right now. He was, and I stress the word was, a man that she trusted. He’s dehumanizing her, breaking her down, so that he can build her back up to be sold as a sex slave. No. I do not want to be in that situation. The attraction to that rp is the challenge of writing it. I’m not aroused by her struggles or his treatment of her. What does cause a stirring within me is the anger I feel when I read my partner’s posts. Yes. I get angry. Make me feel something when you write to me. Anger, lust, sadness, anything. I’ve ranted, had panic attacks, even cried after reading posts. Those are the ones that stay with me. The kinks, the things that draw a person to have those sorts of reactions can be hard to find, and I’m glad this thread was started to address those. Death, blood, physical and mental abuse, I want the chance to explore them more. Finding partners is hard though.

I think we look at our partners and can only see them in certain types of rps. For example, I can’t see one of my partners doing a romantic rp. So even if they’re talented, willing to explore all your kinks, sometimes it may be hard to put them in those kinds of roles. LadyDark and I do some female on female scenes. Would I do a strictly girl on girl rp with her? No. She’s not comfortable with it. Does it mean she’s not talented? No. It’s just not her style. So do you find you have trouble matching other people’s styles? Has there ever been anyone you wanted to write with so badly, but your styles didn’t match up? How did you handle the disappointment?

 

[Outside-the-Box Jellyfish]

Why not have a character that's, let's say, 68.

Plenty of real life people that age are still virile. Yet, ask a potential partner about it and they almost have an asthma attack.

A lot of people I think have issues with characters they don't think of conventionally attractive.
I wonder how many people would get bothered if their partner's character was going to be overweight (aside from people who have a specific thing for that).
Or characters who are explicitly ugly or have otherwise unattractive features.
Like if it's not part of the premise they expect physical perfection from any character involved.

I mean, I've seen people who backed out of an RP because the face-claim someone else picked "wasn't attractive enough" to them.

 

[Rudolph Quin]

Well, I think it has a lot to do with the fantasy aspect of the writing and role-playing itself. Unless that's your fantasy or your kink, then no, generally people aren't going to want to imagine themselves as a wrinkly old person, a fat person, or someone that looked like they got beat with an ugly stick and they're not going to want to imagine their self-insert, their "alter-ego", their ROLE as someone attracted to those kinds of people. Nobody is saying that old people or fat people or unattractive people cannot be virile, that they cannot be sexy in certain circumstances, or that they aren't people with feelings and autonomy. It's purely from a fantasy perspective that the ideal will take precedence, even if it is an unrealistic representation.

It has a lot to do with our culture's interpretations of biology, like how older women no longer present as desirable at a certain age because they lose sexual interest due to menopause. Very general and it's not true for everyone but that is what most of the time happens.

I've wanted to do a Django rp with Dr. Schultz(my av) ever since I saw that movie, so, it's not unheard of for there to be older characters in rps or to find people who want that. But I understand why it's not the norm, especially for old women characters.

 

[AndNich123]

Now that is just wrong. Backing out of a rp because the face claim wasn't attractive enough? Wow. In one of my rps, the character I played opposite of wasn't in the best of shape. I can't recall if we discussed it ahead of time or not. I want to say I was a little shocked by his description, but I began to feel an attraction to this character. So it worked out. I also had it sprung on me that one character I was going to be playing was of a different race. I went with it. It worked out nicely. To turn down a rp because the opposing character isn't attractive is just silly. I want to play opposite a man that is not attractive, and I also want a scene with a bum. Diversity can open so many doors, and if you refuse to walk through them for shallow reasons, you could be missing a great rp.

 

[ShadowsLitany]

Raisins are sexy

 

[Rudolph Quin]

Now that is just wrong. Backing out of a rp because the face claim wasn't attractive enough? Wow. In one of my rps, the character I played opposite of wasn't in the best of shape. I can't recall if we discussed it ahead of time or not. I want to say I was a little shocked by his description, but I began to feel an attraction to this character. So it worked out. I also had it sprung on me that one character I was going to be playing was of a different race. I went with it. It worked out nicely. To turn down a rp because the opposing character isn't attractive is just silly. I want to play opposite a man that is not attractive, and I also want a scene with a bum. Diversity can open so many doors, and if you refuse to walk through them for shallow reasons, you could be missing a great rp.

I do not think representation for the sake of "inclusiveness" is the direction this discussion should take. I can reject any rp request for whatever reason that I want and no that is not wrong. I'd prefer if we do not shame people for making that choice. After all, if they are not attracted to your character, then what's the point? Why force it? Should they stay just so they don't offend anybody? What sort of fantasy fulfillment is that? Personal preference trumps everything in this hobby. If you went with it, that is fine, good for you for growing and broadening your horizons. Not everyone is here for that and it is not wrong for them to have different standards than you or me or anyone else. They're here for them and that is how it should be.