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Finding Acceptance (Skyro & darkangel76)

He panicked again, this new emotion was not one he was enjoying. Anger was one he was accustomed to however. Scooping Vivianne from the ground he lifted her into his arms. She was small and ample, light, again his manly said kicked in.

Fighting back the urge to lay her down and take her right then, he began to run. All the time, it was getting lighter overtop and the canopy of trees was getting thinner allowing more and more light through.

He ran further and eventally entered out into a large field, filled with light.

He entered into a large field, it was now early morning and the birds were singing but that wasn't what Dime was hearing. All he could hear was the clattering armour of the guards. He rushed forwards, looking for anywhere to hide. Shifting Vivianne to rest on his shoulder, he headed for something out to the left of him. A small wooden shack, as he headed towards it, the sounds of the guards got fainter until finally he could here them no more.

He pushed open the shack door, to his surprise it was a small house. A little table and stove, complete with arm chair. He rested down Vivianne's body and moved around the house. Ther was only one other room, with a small wooden bed in it.

They would stay here for a while, if the owner returned, he would deal with them...
 
Vivianne stirred a little and slowly opened her eyes. She felt much warmer and the ground underneath her felt much softer. As her eyes adjusted, she realized that she was sitting in a large arm chair. And that she was inside. Sitting up, she looked around.

Dime stood near the doorway and as Vivianne sat up, he immediately turned around. His face still looked cold and it made her shrink back a little in fear. Despite the fact that she wanted to bolt, she remained in the chair. Sitting silently and still.

Vivianne wondered how they came upon such a place. It must have been ‘luck’. And she wondered if Dime had carried her there. The last thing she remembered was feeling dizzy and then fainting. But that had been back in the woods. How far did he carry her?

“Thank you,” Vivianne spoke quietly. “For not leaving me behind.” She didn’t know if Dime would understand why she thanked him. So she explained herself a little. “I can’t go back there. I can’t.” Her eyes watered a little, making their violet hue look ethereal, angelic. “If you knew my family. What they’d planned to do with me…” She shook her head and buried her face in her hands as her tears began to freely fall.

Vivianne allowed her body to shake with sobs. Sobs over what she’d run away from and over what was happening to her now. Her life had been turned upside down. Had gone from one terror to another. It was too much.

“I’m sorry,” Vivianne then said as she choked on a sob. She didn’t expect Dime to care or understand. She expected him to remain cold, harsh. To either kill her or rape her or both in the next few hours or so. She looked up at him, eyes wide. “Just get it over with,” she whispered. “Please.” More tears fell from her eyes as her breaths came and went with shaky inhales and exhales. “If you’re going to kill me. Just do it. I’d rather die than go back there.”
 
Dime looked at her and tilted his head a bit, he wasn't quite sure what to say. He wanted to rip the clothes from this woman and violate her, pushing inside her. But for the frist time, he didn't want to do it against her will.

Fighting with his emotions again, he looked at the girl infront of him. "You're here because you are worth money," he said after a while. He only half believe this.

He stepped forward and look at the woman before him. "If you listen to me, and listen carefully, then I shall not kill you." He waited for a response, but deciding against allowing her to speak, he spoke again, "and if you are somewhat good, I will not take you either."
 
Vivianne blinked her violet eyes several times. ‘Did this man just show me mercy?’ she thought to herself. She almost couldn’t believe it. Tugging on her cloak she just nodded, a warm feeling growing in the pit of her stomach. A sense of relief.

Dime had said he wouldn’t kill her. Wouldn’t… rape her. Vivianne felt her body tense up for a moment when he mentioned he wouldn’t take her so long as she was ‘somewhat good’. The admission that he thought about taking her made her blood cold, but it also made her feel somewhat at ease. Admitting such a thing openly made her feel as though she could trust his words. So, as terrifying as he was, she found herself believing him.

Dime had also said Vivianne was worth money. She figured this was more than likely true. She was of nobility. Her family a part of the court. And she knew the role she was to play in her parents’ scheme for power. They would do anything to get her back. They would willingly pay any ransom Dime set.

The thought of having to go back to her family frightened Vivianne. At the realization of what Dime was planning, she suddenly stood up and clutched onto his arm. “Please, I’ll be good, I swear to you. I won’t run.” Her voice was full of panic and fear. “Please, don’t send me back there. Please. I can’t.” She got onto her knees as she held onto his arm. “Please, I can’t marry him. I can’t.”
 
As she grabbed hold of him, he raised his hand to slap her but dropped it before doing so. He didn't want to hit her. Something was wrong with him. Was he ill? Pity, Panic and now more pity?

He looked down at her, he almost didn't want to send her back. He eyed up the girl in front of him, her violet eyes capturing him. Another feeling rose in the pit of his stomach, what was this? He didn't want to rip the clothes from this woman anymore. He wanted to kiss her, hold her. He was definately ill.

He said the only thing he could think of, grabbing her by the arm to raise her to her feet, "Why don't you want to return?"
 
Vivianne was suddenly grabbed by the arm. Dime raised her up to her feet and looked into her eyes, his own so cold, so menacing. She winced a little at the pain she felt from his grip and let out a small whimper before she finally mustered up the courage to speak.

“I can’t go back. They’ll make me marry him. I can’t do that. I can’t.” Vivianne looked away from Dime, her eyes filling with tears once more. “I can’t marry someone I don’t love. Someone so despicable.”

Vivianne bit down on her lip and returned her violet gaze back to Dime’s. Her expression was one of panic, of worry.

“Please, my parents wish to use me. To thrust me into a life with someone that will only benefit them. I’ll be miserable for the rest of my days if I’m forced to marry such a man.” Vivianne blinked a few times and swallowed. “I made a vow to myself many years ago,” she added. “A vow to only marry for the deepest love. Please don’t send me back. Don’t make me break my vow,” she whispered. “Please. I’d rather die.”

Vivianne’s voice was full of emotion, such sorrow, such fear. She could only hope that somehow Dime would understand. That somehow he would take pity on her. More than anything, she hoped that such thoughts and wishes for his understanding weren’t in vain. He’d only shown her cruelty until moments ago when he told her he’d spare her her life and her honor. But could she expect him to give her this? Her heart hoped, it was all she had left to cling on to.
 
Dime looked at the woman in front of him, she had everything yet she wanted none of it. This confused him. He had never known his parents and growing up, spent most of his time on the streets or in a cell so never really knew what it was like to have parents.

He used to wonder what it would be like when he was younger, to have parents, someone to love you. But he grew out of that, or at least he thought he did. His younger emotions were returning to him, why would she give up so much? The question plagued him. To ask her would seem weak so he resisted any temptations to do so.

He should kill her there and then, get it over and done with. She was more hassle than she was worth, but everytime he even considered bringing a knife to her heart, or to slice her throat, he had that same feeling in the bottom of his stomach.

He was confused, he sat down on one of the dining table chairs, his huge frame hardly to fit. Look into Vivianne's deep eyes, he lost himself. He didn't want to kill her, but he couldn't send her back either, even for a ransom. She wanted out too much. He felt connected to her somehow, but he didn't know how. All he could feel was a feeling in the bottom on his stomach everytime he laid eyes on her. His thoughts of lust were replaced which those of simply holding her.

Having enough of his own mind, he rose to his feet once again and stood in the kitched area. Taking an apple from the basket on the side, he bit into it and then threw it in the general direction of Vivianne. "Eat," he said, his voice was not as gruff as it usually was. What was wrong with him?

I won't send you back. He thought it, but telling her it would be weak.
 
Dime tossed an apple in Vivianne’s direction. She let out a small yelp as it came toward her. Raising up her hands in defense, she actually caught the piece of fruit. Astounded, she couldn’t help but smile a little.

“Thank you,” Vivianne said as she brought the apple to her lips and took a big bite. It was utterly delicious. She hadn’t eaten in so long that she was famished. The crisp texture of the fruit and the sweetness of the juices made her sigh contentedly.

When Vivianne finished the apple and all that was left was the core, she slowly approached Dime, her eyes pleading. “Please,” she said. “Please don’t send me back there.” She got down on her knees beside him and took his large hand in her small, delicate one. “I beg you,” she added.

Vivianne felt her entire body tremble as she tried to let Dime know just how desperate she was to stay away from her family. From Lord Peter Fielding. She didn’t know if he understood or even cared. His eyes remained cold, his face expressionless. She wondered what he was thinking. She wondered if she had the slightest of chances that he’d take pity on her yet a third time and show her mercy.

“My life is in your hands, please,” Vivianne said in a whisper. And by life she no longer meant life versus death. She truly meant ‘the life she was to live’. Her fate. Her fate now rested in Dime’s decisions. She bowed her head trying to show him a sign of her trust. She hoped that he’d understand that she was trying to show him that she was accepting the fact that her life was now in his hands.
 
Once again, his body reacted to Vivianne's gestures. On her knees infront of him, his bulge began to grow agian. DAMN IT. He looked down her her, she took his hand. It felt some how right. Again, these were unfamilar feelings for the hulk of a man who spent most of his life stealing from and raping woman. Not.. dare he think it, loving them?

For a second, he allowed his face to show compassion, but he quickly masked it with a scowl. "Stop beg.." he stuttered, DAMN IT. "Stop begging you little slut." He said, he was now over compensating. But he couldn't allow her to think he was weak. It was a while before he spoke again, but they stood in the same places. Waiting for the other to speak, eventually, it was Dime who broke the silence.

He doesn't quite know why he said it, but out of the blue he said; "My name is Matthew," blurting it out he turned around and picked up a plate he had rested on the side and threw it against the opposite wall. DAMN IT. He said nothing else, but walked away to sit on the arm chair and lent back. He was sure that the girl would go no where, I mean, where would she go?

Uneasily, he slept and allowed Vivianne some time alone. Dime hoped sleep might help bring his emotions into order.
 
Vivianne went into the tiny side room where she found a small wooden bed. She left Dime… Matthew… to sit in the arm chair. He seemed so angry. She figured it best to just leave him alone for a while.

The little bed looked comfortable enough. There were pillows and blankets on it and they looked to be quite warm. Vivianne was still bone cold, so the thought of snuggling deep under the warm blankets appealed to her greatly.

Vivianne took off her cloak and draped it on the tiny chair in the room. She then sat down on the bed and removed her shoes. Standing up once more, she turned down the covers and hopped into the bed. It was softer than she thought it would be, though at this point anything was better than cold, wet, hard ground. She pulled the blankets up around her body and laid her head against the pillows. Snuggling deeply under the blankets she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep. Her last thoughts of Matthew, wondering what he’d end up doing with her, wondering why he was the man she saw standing before her.
 
Matthe fell to sleep easily, he had not slept in days after all, but his sleep was restless.

Dreams came and went, strange images filled his head. He saw himself looking out at the sea with Vivianne, he saw himself holding hands walking along a beach, he even say himself kissing her tenderly on the lips. These were not the dreams he was accustomed to. In fact, over the years, his mind had learnt to block out any imagination other than that of a sexual nature to him. He never imagine women for anything more than their bodies, yet here he was, dreaming about the woman that he had captured.

His dreams slowly progressed, some dreams worse than others. He saw the guards invading, he was them carrying Vivianne away helpless while she screamed and kicked. He saw them violate her in a way that he had intended the nights before. The entire time, all he wanted to do was kill the men who stood over her, forcing themselves upon her. He just wanting to hold her tight and tell her everything would be okay. Yet he was helpless, he couldn't move, his body was frozen while they did as they pleased. Vivianne's screamed each one took her in turn, abusing her body in ways it was no intended for. They were breaking her.

Dime's eyes opened suddenly, and he quickly surveyed the now dark room. What time was it? and then it occured to him that Vivianne was no longer present. He thought he could trust her! He jumped up, he wanted to be angry, but he was worried. The new emotion washed over his face, he was pained at her disappearance. He checked the kitchen for signs of her, he checked outside and then he checked the small bedroom with the small bed.

Then the emotion of relief came, he saw her sweet head resting against the pillow in a wonderful slumber. Check full chest moving up and down in time with her breathing. He sat next to the bed, and just watched. Why was his mind betraying his body?
 
Vivianne awoke with a start, her eyes somewhat teary. It was still dark, but she sat upright in the little bed she’d fallen asleep in. She’d had the most terrible dream, a dream that her father had found her and had forced her to marry Lord Peter Fielding. And that Lord Fielding had taken her unwillingly on the eve of their wedding night. She felt frightened, panicked, worried. Dirty.

Gasping for air, Vivianne’s eyes darted around the small room. Next to her, she saw Matthew, his face looking so… was it concern? She couldn’t tell, but his eyes didn’t look as cold or as harsh as she remembered them to be earlier that day let alone her entire time of having known him.

Trembling, Vivianne reached out to Matthew, touching his arm gently. She needed comfort after such a dream and Matthew was the only person around. Daring to test her trust in him, she spoke.

“I’m frightened,” Vivianne’s voice came out in a choked whisper. “My dream, I…” her voice trailed. “Please don’t leave me,” she finally asked. “I don’t want to be alone right now.” Body shaking, eyes pleading, she hoped that Matthew would find it in his heart to grant her yet another request.
 
He wanted to raise his hand and slap her face. He wanted to twist her arm. He wanted to hold her. He wanted to stay with her.

He didn't know what he wanted.

He looked down at the girl in front of him. He was confused, someone wanted comfort... from him? He stared at her for a while before gently placing his hand on her arm. He didn't know how to offer comfort. He knew only violence and control. He closed his eyes, trying to figure what to do next. Did he hug her? Did he hold her hand?

"I.." he stuttered, his eyes were softer than usual and he no longer wore a stern stare. "I.. don't.." he couldn't get his words out. He looked into her eyes again, he needed support as much as her. She was changing him... and somehow, he liked it. He just didn't want to admit it.
 
“Matthew, please. Just stay with me for a while.” Vivianne’s voice pleaded with him yet again. “I’m sorry. It’s just that my dream…” her voice trailed and her eyes teared up again. She wrapped her arms around herself and shivered. Looking back into Matthew’s eyes, she added, “He took me, Matthew. He forced me…”

Vivianne’s breath caught in her throat as she recalled her vivid dream. Lord Fielding throwing her onto their wedding bed and forcing himself upon her. Taking away her innocence, making her break her vow. Each thrust he took made her weep harder and harder while his moans grew louder and louder.

Vivianne looked at Matthew. “It’s a dream I fear will come true.” She hesitated a moment. “If you send me back.” Biting down on her lip she touched his arm once more. “Just stay with me for a little bit.”
 
Dime gave into his senses. Being called Matthew melted the last bit of hate he had inside him for this woman. "Shhh.." he said, what else could he say? He took her hand in his and rested it on his knee. "Sleep now," he said, nodding at her slowly. "When you wake up, we'll sort something out, I'll take you somewhere safe and then leave you to do as you please."

He had no plans to stop his crime sprees, he just couldn't bring himself to hurt this woman. Had she actually taught him some compassion. "Just rest now."
 
Vivianne smiled at Matthew. With her free hand, she reached up and touched his cheek. “Thank you,” she said in a whisper.

Slowly, Vivianne laid back down, resting her head upon the pillows. Matthew’s hand was warm and soothing as it held her own. She was appreciative of his sudden kindness and found herself wondering how long it would last. At the moment, she tried not to dwell on that too much. She was just thankful that he was willing to comfort her now. So different from how he’d been earlier.

Vivianne laced her fingers with Matthew’s, giving his large hand a squeeze as she closed her eyes and allowed her body to drift off to sleep. She was able to sleep much more soundly with Matthew nearby, knowing that he promised to let her go once he got her somewhere safe and away from her family, away from Lord Fielding. As sleep overtook her, she decided to trust that he’d keep his word. She had no other choice. But the look in his eyes as he promised her had said enough. She hoped her instincts were correct and that Matthew could now be trusted.
 
Once asleep, Dime sat back in the chair and continued to watch her sleep. They were safe in this shack, but once they moved to a town, it was likely that a man hunt was on. He needed to devise a plan. He thought long and hard but each time he closed his eyes and put his hands to his head all he could see what Vivianne's beauiful face. He wasn't fighting it anymore but he still had to content with horniess that was riding over his body.

He still wanted to be deep inside the woman infront of them, but would not make an advance. He knew she was saving herself and that he could not take from her. But stll, he manhood grew and he could not help it. He needed to do something about it. He stood up and stepped from the room, he wouldn't do this while she was sleeping there. He sat down in the big char in the living room and unbuckled his trousers, allowing his monster to breath and slowly, he slipped a hand around it.

Something he had not been able to do in a very long time.
 
When Vivianne awoke again, the sky was just barely becoming light with the morning sun. Dawn had still not yet come. Matthew was no longer in her room and she wondered where he’d gone. If he’d left her. She got up out of bed, her hair askew, her satin dress rumpled, clinging to her body, and walked out into the living area.

Matthew was asleep in the arm chair. He looked exhausted even though he seemed to be sleeping relatively fitfully. Vivianne knelt down on the floor at his feet and looked up at him. He almost looked kind while he slept. She tilted her head and smiled. She was so thankful that he’d finally come around a little bit and given her mercy.

Vivianne stood up just then and gently touched Matthew’s shoulder. She figured he’d want to leave the little house sooner rather than later. Day was coming and she didn’t know exactly what that would bring. She leaned close to him, her mouth against his ear. “It’ll be daylight soon. Wake up,” she whispered gently.
 
He work with a startle, almost knocking the poor girl down. His sleep hadn't been the easiet sleep in his life, but he no longer had sex plaguing his mind. He rose, "sorry!" he said quickly. He walked walked into the kitchen, stretching his arms as he went. He grabbed up another apple and threw a second to Vivianne. "Eat up," you'll need it he said yawning. Looking around in the Kitchen he found some bread and a little butter. Button the bread, he split it in half and handed part of it to Vivianne. "I'm sorry we have no more," he said, he had no idea why he was apoligising but it felt like the right thing to do.

He scouted the house and found two bags. He filled one with the fruit from the kitchen and in the other he threw different items from around the house. If it was shiny, he took it. They would need some money when they arrived in the next town, and these would sell for enough. He could set Vivianne up and be on his way. "We must leave soon Vivianne," he said, noticing her messy hair and dress. "Might want to fix up, I don't know how far we have to travel." He waiting for Vivianne to disappear back into the bedroom and stood at the door. Looking out across the open field, in the distance he could make out some smoke. That was his only indicator of where to go and so, he decided that was where to head.
 
Vivianne smiled as Matthew tossed her the apple. She took a large bite out of it and heaved a contented sigh. It tasted so very delicious.

“We must leave soon, Vivianne,” Matthew said as Vivianne munched on her apple and bread. “Might want to fix up, I don’t know how far we have to travel.”

Vivianne nodded in understand. She went back into the bedroom and made the bed. Sitting down on it she put her shoes back on and then straightened out her dress as best she could given the circumstances. Running her fingers through her long, dark hair, she attempted to comb it, to make it look presentable. When finished, she grabbed her cloak and put it on.

“I’m ready,” Vivianne said softly as she came out of the tiny bedroom. Matthew was standing in the doorway, looking out into the distance. She wondered what he saw, wondered where he planned to bring her. Walking over to him, she gently touched his arm and noticed the bags at his feet that he’d packed for their journey. She noticed that he was looking across the field and spotted the smoke rising in the distance. “Is that where we’re going?” she asked. She wondered if it was the signs of life, a nearby town. “I’ll try my best not to slow you down.”
 
They stepped out the door, side by side, looking out at the early morning sun. The smoke rising into the sky signalled where they must head and so they stepped across the soft, wet, due covered grass towards the fence in the distance. "I don't know how long it will take, but I will give you some money and then we must leave each other." He looked sideways at her, the sun was slowly rising further. He stretched his arms into the air and carried the two bags over his shoulders.

They continued their way, not really speaking for a long time. Eventually, they reacher the fence and Vivianne clearly couldn't climb it. Dime had to laugh, another thing he wasn't used to. He threw the bags over the fence and grabbed onto Vivianne's hips, "time to get over there," he indicated. He didn't life her, he didn't want to touch her anymore without her permission. He was getting far to defensive of this girl, even for his own liking.
 
Vivianne watched Matthew hoist the bags over the fence. She looked at the thing barring their way and blinked. There was no way she’d be able to climb it. Especially in the clothes she had on. They just weren't conducive for such travel.

Matthew walked up to Vivianne just then and placed his hands on her hips. “Time to get over there,” he spoke. His voice wasn’t nearly as gruff as it had been, his eyes softer. The sight of such small changes warmed Vivianne, touched her. Suddenly, his grip on her hips loosened a little. He hesitated.

Vivianne tilted her head, wondering why Matthew paused so abruptly. Unsure of why he’d stopped from helping her over the fence, she just smiled at him reassuringly. “Matthew, I’ll need assistance to get over the fence. If you could help me…” her voice trailed. Slowly, she reached her hands up and placed them on his shoulders. “However is easiest. It’s all right.” Again she smiled at him. “I promise not to run once on the other side. You have my word.” She paused and then added. “I’ll wait for you.”
 
Depsite the reassurance from Vivianne, Matthew never really worried much about her running. For one she couldn't get far and for enough, he believe in some round-about way, she trusted him.

He hoisted Vivianne up, holding her above his for a few seconds and their faces came within inches of each other and their eyes met. Dime quickly, out Vivianne down as gently as possible on the other side of the fence before quickly stradelling it and jumping over to join Vivianne himself on the other side. Picking up the two bags, and looking about for the smoke signal again, they continued on their way.

Dime was sure they were walking cloer together now, but he couldn't be sure.
 
Vivianne was pleasantly surprise at how gentle Matthew was when he lifted her up. Everything had gone in slow motion for her. She felt her feet lift from the ground and her violet eyes suddenly locked with his. Strangely, she felt her breath catch, as if time just stopped for that moment. But then, he continued lifting her, breaking the spell and helping her over to the other side.

Gently, Vivianne felt Matthew set her down, as if she were something precious. It was so odd to her, this slight change. But she welcomed it greatly. It helped her feel better about her decision to trust in him. Made her feel safe. She waited for Matthew to finish climbing over the fence. Once his feet were on the ground, he picked up the bags and the two of them resumed walking.

Vivianne walked closer to Matthew as they headed toward the smoke rising up in the distance. For some reason, being closer to him made her feel more at ease. It was so strange given how scary she found him to be, how terrifying. But he was also showing her that there was more to him than the steel and ice, the man who just took without a care, the gruff monster who took pleasure in instilling fear. It made her smile.

The two of them walked onward for what seemed like forever to Vivianne. Her feet were hurting, she was hungry, she was tired.

“Please,” Vivianne spoke up, though her voice was soft. “May we rest a little? Just for a few moments at least?”
 
Matthew could do with the rest also, and while he was enjoying the fresh hair against his face and through his fair, he could feel his stomach beginning to call out to him.

They walked another minute or so, to rest under a shady oak tree that seemed alone in the middle of the field. That's how he had felt for a long time, a giant among men, but alone with his roots reaching out, but never finding anyone.

He retrieved two more apples from the bag, "I'm sorry we have nothing else," he said, nodding his head slightly. They sat close, looking out at the impressive few that stretched for miles. Matthew turned to look at Vivianne, and stared at her for a long moment. He wanted to kiss her, he had never shared a kiss of love before. But now he craved it. Just turn! He sighed a deep sigh. What if she was still scared of him? Deep thoughts disturbed his thoughts, could he kiss a woman who he might scare away?

He just continued to stare, while she stared into the view.
 
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