(you Pass by 10. 0.0)
Lios starts shaking his head, speaking with bitter tones in his voice, "You think I don't know that? The clergy of those who worship Dibella, we rarely fall in love. We love, but do not fall. Do you know why? Because it is too focused, too intense... for people trying to love so many things, places, people at once in so many different degrees and ways... To have a fire that strong would burn our own little worlds to tatters."
He pauses for breath, "But it's not unheard of. It is, in fact, encouraged. But few do it. And I... I want to, I want her badly. Before we... well, I'm sure you heard, but before that, I felt jealousy. I should not feel that, were I still in the role I accepted whole-heartedly. The role where I love, but am not attached... I.. I... I am... falling for her, heavily."
Lios lets out a sad chuckle. "And from what I can gather, her people? They do group marriages and polygamy. Dibella might accept that, but I can't! ... Not for me..."
He continues onward, without waiting for response. "I wear a collar, you see. It's a magic collar. Used by high end slavers. Those who wear it don't need to eat. They only need 2 hours of sleep for a full night's rest... and the collars don't come off." He started crying again, his sobs wrenching his body, though he refused to turn to Balmung.
"Do you understand? This is the only life I'd known until mother... but even then!" he snarled out.
Another shift of emotion, and he is speaking soft and sad. "I didn't understand what love was... what real love was, so I went to find it. I read and studied. I prayed the Lady of Love would give me insight.. and she does. Every time. Each time, I find a kind of real love... but it still leaves me unsatisfied."
Lios' took in a deep breath, slowly letting it out. His voice and breathing immediately leveled out and took on a tone completely devoid of emotion. It is really kinda creepy/scary. "Then I found myself. I found balance, and I found comfort, and I found peace of mind. Now... I don't know what to do. I've only known Ber'nia for several hours, not even a day! In addition, I'm certain she wouldn't quite understand my distress, maybe not even these feelings. Our societies, I hear, are vastly different. I am at a total loss."
(Lios didn't notice Ber'nia was there... at all. Failed his listen, refused his spot. ^.^;; )