Mental Disabilities and RP Discrimination

[Anonymityinthedark]

So this is a bit of a rant and with any luck a chance to have a open and frank discussion about disclosing disabilities and how in my experance on this sight it has done nothing but shut down RP. So just quickly about me, I have multiple developmental disorders including being on the autism spectrum. Now if I am lucky enpuph to get a reply the answers from my partners seem to drop off shortly after I disclose the fact. It is endlessly frustrating as I want to rp, I have been doing it for over 10 years. There has been the rare instance that the potential partner tells me that they are just not interested. That is fine, my issue comes with when I put the work into world building and make the first post to have my partner ghost me. They update there request thread but don't ever get back to me by and just say that they are not interested.

It makes me feel like I am unimportant, that I am just not worth the time to say sorry. That one word can go along way, growing up I got use to being unincluded in things at least I had an idea that I was not wanted.

In the ever increasingly rare opportunity that I get some ooc messages setting up the story let my potential partner know this and then nothing... it gets bad. It feels like I am not worth the 8 words it takes to say "Sorry, but it is not going to work." It makes me feel less then the dirt underneath your fingernails and makes me feel that I am unwelcome because of my disabilities. I have tools that help with my spelling and grammar but I am not perfect. With every potential partner that ghosts me in feel less and less welcome, and less and less like I belong. It has gotten to the point that I am ready to pack it all up and leave.

I don't know of any one else out there who has developmental disorders has spoken out or of this has already been a dissolution but I feel the need for this to be brought up. Not going to run this through spell check or credit check, this is who I am and if I'm not welcome then I'll leave.

 

[MellowYellow]

I don't mean to sound callous, but this happens to most people, disability or no disability.

Some people just disregard partners, that's how things go.

 

[freeko]

I would say this issue has nothing to do with developmental disorders and is just, unfortunately what happens here on a regular basis.

Just for the record, I would say that out of the last 20 pm's I have sent I got no response at all back from about half of them. A few would tail off once we start to get into details of what both of us expect. A few have gone out there and done something, and the rest just sorta die right out of the gates. It just happens. It is an unfortunate side effect of the experience here. Some good and some bad. Eventually this will lead to you finding someone that you eventually end up rp'ing with for years to come with some level of perseverance.

 

[Chai]

I'm sorry this has happened to you and that this has been your experience.

However, like all the others have said, this happens regardless of disability or lack thereof. It takes time to find reliable partners that really mesh with you as far as writing. But those kind of partners will be few compared to the amount of people that ghost or disappear. It just comes with the territory of roleplaying.

I've always kept it in the back of my mind that people aren't obligated to reply to me. This isn't a job, it's not a contract, and I don't know them. They have no responsibility to tell me about their life and what's going on in it, so if they disappear then they just disappear. Brush it off and say, "Ok, on to the next one." Unfortunately, that's all we can do unless you know for a fact that you're being discriminated against.

 

[Anonymityinthedark]

Thank you all for your replies, it is good to know that I am not the only one who constantly gets ghosted. Thank you all for your replies.

 

[crony]

I agree with the others. It happens to all of us. If you're communicating with strangers, it's inevitable. People treat people differently than they would in real life. Personally and unfortunately for me, I can't help but have a conscious all the time with everyone I deal with so when the responses are slowing, I'd ask if they are still interested. Either they will tell you the truth about being busy or not as interested or they will lie and say it's going great, just been busy then you never hear from the again. I don't let it stop me from doing something I love. I keep the faith that sooner or later, I will find partners to write with long term.

You are just as welcome here as anyone else. A disability wouldn't make you less welcome. If anyone stops replying to you with an rp they were enjoying until they found out then they're not worth your time anyway.

 

[Yoga Princess]

Blue Moon and other like minded forums are notorious for ghosting.