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Avalon (Hat + Anna)

It didn't take Anna all too long to fall asleep, which surprised her. She expected to toss and turn, her thoughts racing a mile a minute and keeping her from actually falling asleep properly in the unfamiliar setting. And she did, honestly and truly, miss her crappy bed. Sure, it was just a mattress on the floor, but it was a fuckin' comfy mattress on the floor. Maybe it was just how utterly dark it got out when you didn't have the light pollution of a city around you, or the mental exhaustion of the day, but she collapsed almost utterly as soon as she was inside. She didn't even dream, at first, until something inane began to try to make sense of what had happened during the day.

And then it abruptly stopped.

She felt like she was awake and simultaneously knew that she wasn't. She wasn't actually breathing, and weirdly, she was able to notice that almost immediately. Trying to look at her hands showed her nothing, like she was invisible, just a floating point of view as if she were the main character in DOOM or something. Minus the big, pixelly shot gun. Or maybe she was herself, and just couldn't move her hands, despite the instinct to do so, her body still sleeping peacefully and ignoring the impulses of her mind.

Regardless, it wasn't an entirely pleasant sensation.

She followed the interloper of her dreams with her eyes, but could do little else as he introduced himself as one of the gods she'd poked with a virtual stick. .. well, at least she had proven that they'd listen to her, and that was definitely something. She'd chalk it up as progress! Good progress? .. wellll, they'd see. It was hard to be properly nervous about things while she was asleep. And it seemed as though, in the end, her idea had been a sound one.

See? She'd asked for a miracle, and she'd gotten one. Not a big one maybe, but these gods knew that she was on their side or somethin'. This was going to be the easiest quest ever, if she had literal, actual gods helping her out.

When he leaned inward, smiling a grin that seemed too big for his face, something struck her as being off. Moreso than the mask or his playful mannerism, it felt as though he were chiding her or teasing her.

"m'sorry f'r textin' you 'ike that," Anna mumbled into the silence of her tent, barely tossing to the side in her sleep. As far as she could figure, maybeeeee texting the gods was acting a little big for her britches in Clown's book at least. But if being immodest about asking for help was going to get her miracles anyway .. eh, she'd live.

Actually replying to him, however, was what broke the entire illusion. Speaking aloud tricked her ears into confusion, and Anna abruptly shifted, her eyes flicking open blearily as the dream evaporated and the waking world rushed in to greet her.
 
The blue world of dawn greeted her, a soft chill and moist air joining in eagerly. But otherwise, almost nearly entire silence, broken by Speaks preparing something by the fire. Eventually he made his way towards the flap of her tent, standing near it.
"Ah, Anna." he said, "Could you help and find Freddy for me, get him for breakfast?" he asked, "He mentioned the river, he should be there. Just follow the sound of water." he said, "Oh, and you're free to a change of clothes, offered by Spider." he said, his hand dropping a pile of linen and leather just inside the tent.

If she decided to wear it, she'd find it an... interesting look. Leather pants that fit just right, a rather flattering bodice, a shirt with wide sleeves, boots, and even a cloak that went to her knees, were she so inclined. All in all, quite nicely tailored.
 
Hey, onward and upward, right? Though bleary eyed and confused for several minutes in which Anna remained lying inside the tent and trying to focus on remembering and considering the God's words clearly ( she knew she had a get out of danger free card, that was good!) she had the foresight to roll over and check her phone to see if anyone else had responded in a more .. conventional manner before she saw Speaks' distinctive silhouette approaching her tent.

"I'm decent," she promised through a yawn, having only taken off her boots in the night anyway. And just as she was beginning to wonder how many days it would be kosher to get away with wearing this single outfit, Spider went and practically read her mind.

Look, the dude was weird and not exactly the best at explaining things, but even she had to admit that he was coming through for her so far. In Anna's esteem, she was two for two with the Gods being pretty chill about this whole salvation from Human ruin thing, it made her feel like she was really part of the team, yanno?

"Yeah, definitely. I'll go make sure Arkansas didn't find any particularly slender fish," she agreed through another stifled yawn while she checked out the ren fair get-up that the God has made for her. .. yeesh. Was a new pair of jeans really that much harder than leather? Well. When in Rome, right? Anna didn't feel super comfortable dressing up in a new costume per se, but some people less understanding than Freddy and Speaks might've had some questions about her current ensemble.

Hoping that the endless void wasn't going to be contaminated by a single days wear on her old clothes, Anna shoved them all into the hat after undressing and redressing in her tent with a little too much grunting and struggling for her own sake. It all fit like a damn dream, actually, it was just hard for her to figure out some of the laces and angles to get it all on. Without a mirror it was hard to say for sure .. but hey, everything was in place, looked pretty good, and didn't come off as "skanky wench and/or magicians apprentice" as far as she could figure, even with the top hat on.

Not her favorite look, but she could definitely live with it.

Fully dressed in new, clean things she popped out of the tent and began to follow the sound of running water. "Be back in a jiffy, Speaks," she promised over her shoulder. At least Freddy was a human dude. He'd give her an honest opinion on how the outfit looked. I mean, as honest as any dude had ever been about a girl's clothes, so .. hot or not. But she'd take a second opinion anyway.
 
It wasn't far. In fact, she heard splashing nearby, and...

And a suit of armor. And a shirt. And pants. And cute boxers with little footballs on them. Boots and sabatons (the bits of armor for the shins and feet) nearby. Not far from the river, and if she chanced to look up...

Wow, he was... Well, he looked strong. Powerful, anyway, in the understated fashion of one who wasn't a bodybuilder but an honest worker. The muscles flexed as he cleaned, with soap in hand, humming to himself. And oh god, what a cock.

It hung there, soft still, looking at least seven inches soft. Was hard to tell from here, really, but under that black fluff was quite a...

Okay, maybe it wasn't him that did the jumping on those Seeran ladies.
 
Huh. Armor. Shirt. Pants. .. boxers. She could tell where this was going. Honestly, she could see the river before she could actually see Frederick, and the minute she saw the underwear she a.) figured out pretty damn quickly that the tall drink of Southern was probably not exactly rocking a bathing suit down there and b.) had every chance in the world to turn back immediately and call out to him to avoid anything embarrassing.

So, cards on the table. If Anna had had any idea whatsoever that homeboy had the means to magically peek right through her clothing, had accidentally done so, and had immediately rectified his mistake, she absolutely would have been completely sure to respect his privacy. It was the cool thing to do, right? But there was this whole double standard thing that, well, polite society just tended to have. You didn't go around peeping at girls if you were a decent human being. Meanwhile, in movies and tvs? Titties and butts galore. You didn't get a whole lot of full frontal men outside of HBO. And for all that she wasn't super sure about him, knowing him for as short of a time as she had so far .. she knew the dude looked good.

So yeah, she was a complete asshole, but she had her cell phone in her hand before she finished rounding the tree line to where he was bathing. What? No, she didn't really care for unsolicited dick pics. Nobody did. Nothin' hot about a random wang. But the entire slice of beefcake, she was absolutely okay with. So while Freddy went right on soaping himself up obliviously, she caught herself pinching the digital zoom to get a nice framed angle annnnd ..

CLI-CKWHRR.

.. her scumbag fucking vibrate switch hadn't been flipped on? Anna, you giant goddamn creeper tool.

"Alright, now one from the back!" she called out, trying to save face with a big old "what, am I doing something wrong?" grin on her face above the little rectangle of her obviously-pointing-right-at-him cell phone.

.. and could anyone blame her? I mean, yeah, she didn't know THAT much about the dude, but after her own strings of drunken hookups with big, good looking guys who ended up disappointing that size queen part of her, I mean -- sploosh? "I was gonna put Speaks in for March, but I think you're really calling out for spring here with the idyllic river and all .. by the way, he's got breakfast on," she added, to let him know she hadn't come out here JUST to gawk and remember the time honored wisdom of Earth's greatest poets:

Save a horse and ride a cowboy in-fuckin'-deed.
 
Oh man, what a wonderful reaction. A cry of shock, brief protest, then a flushed, quiet smile. Of course, he still covered himself - not that wonderful athletic ass, of course - but he still gave her a mock-scolding grin, "A-anna!" he managed, wading towards coast. "Yeah, uh, I'm... I'm on my way." he said. "Water's fine, by the way." he added, hopefully, standing on the bank. It had been maybe a day since she got here, and she had had to travel for a big part of that. "You know, I did ask around. Apparently, among kobolds, Speaks is pretty choice." he said, chuckling as he gathered his things, laying out the armor piece by piece. "Aaaanyway. So, uh. I have a bit of a confession to make." he said, "The monocle, it turns out, didn't just see in the dark. It sees hidden things." he sighed, "Remember, Spider is a trickster god? Speaks neglected to tell me that part when he handed it over, when we met. And when I happened to look at you, well, I had to pull the damn thing out pretty fast." he said quietly. "Sorry. I, uh... May have seen a thing. Two things, really."
 
God. Okay, fine. Fine. She wasn't entirely sure if she was still skeeved out entirely by where the dude decided to go and stick his dick. Call her shallow, but far be it from her to keep him from sharing that thing with the world. .. except for her photos, which were going to be just for her, thank you very much. She whisked off her hat and dropped her cell phone back into it with one last quick little snap, and then she was just all (slightly embarassed) smiles for Freddy.

"Yeah? It's not gonna be freezing if I get in there and take a dip, is it?" she questioned him with somewhat arch curiosity while she worked her way the rest of the distance down the bank, not making a whole lot of bones about the fact that she was still giving him plenty of once overs. If the river water was shocking frigid, then that would have said an awful lot about him that she wasn't quite ready to believe could be true .. so she figured he wasn't pulling her chain about the water being fine.

The smirk that pulled itself across the brunette's plush lips, granted, had already told him no way, Buster at the hopeful edge in his invitation while she looked down to the burbling river and then back at his patient way of laying out his clothing before getting dressed. Jesus, there was statuary that probably had softer muscles than this dude.

"Aw, c'mon, don't tell me I'm going to find out that I'm racking up a bill back home or that this hat's going to eat half the stuff I put into it or something," Anna muttered when Frederick pointed out that Spider wasn't exactly on the up and up, taking a peek down into the void-like entrance of the hat she had between her palms just to confirm that she could see everything still floating around inside it. Of course, once she had finally given Frederick even a moment of privacy from her appraising gaze was when he went and admitted what 'hidden things' actually meant.

"Wait, you were looking through my clothes?" she said with a sudden, sharp attentiveness that every girl her age seemed to have built in for the possibility of feeling deeply offended by something, so it was a good thing Freddy was so quick with the sheepishness and the admission that he pulled the monocle out as fast as he could.

.. whiiich kinda put a twist of the whole guilty conscience thing right into her gut after she'd been staring at him like it was Beefcake Bunday Monday or something. She pulled a grimace to one side of her lips and glanced down at the river before she sighed internally and dropped her hat, brim side up, onto a nearby rock.

"Hey, what's the apology for, Arkansas? It's not like you were trying to scope me out. I mean, you weren't, right?" she quickly clarified of him to make sure she wasn't falling for a convincing little story of chivalry here on a silver tongue. "Figure if I had another foot and twenty less pounds, maybe," she added almost under her breath as to exactly why he almost definitely wouldn't have been trying to scope her out, from what she'd figured about him and the Slender Seeran. Sweeping the cloak off of her shoulders and down beside the hat, she watched him beginning to get dressed before she decided to stop lollygagging, given how nice a quick dip in the river actually did really sound.

"So you gonna leave me the soap?" she asked with a little point of her finger down to suggest he could set it down on the flat, relatively clean rock she'd picked for her things to occupy. Kicking her feet up onto it one after the other, she pulled off the shockingly comfy boots and then unlaced the willowy, well-fitted blouse up and away from her tightly fitted bodice. She was, in the short time she'd worn it, kind of astonished at how well it held everything in place and up without doing too much of the Ren Faire boob-squishing thing. It was actually comfier than she would have assumed at first.

"Tell Speaks I'll just be a minute or two, so you guys don't have to send a search party out for me or anything," she decided to send along with him while she started unlacing the bodice deftly with quick, confident fingers. "But I mean .. we can just head back together, if you feel like waiting for me."

Anna dropped the bodice off of her torso and with the rest of her clothing, and even the peek he'd gotten had scarcely been preparation for just what the unadulterated view was like. Full scarcely began to describe Anna Williams' figure, as there were full loaded fruit trees that wouldn't have earned descriptions like "ripe" as easily as she did. She was heavy-chested enough to make it no surprise that gravity would want to grab at her curves with all its might, and yet young enough that her body practically defied those attempts save for the slight, supple shifts that every little motion or breath gave her. It was like even her rack itself was bragging about how size might not have mattered, but if you were gonna go big, you should at least look that amazing. Part of it was her height. Another foot and twenty pounds less, as she said, and her chest would have simply looked very right on her body .. rather than too-big in the best of ways, for those who found themselves always lost beneath a girl's eyes rather than in them.

The leather pants weren't long for the world either, and given that she had no idea how long she'd be going native for, Anna was pretty honestly thankful she'd shaved just a day or two before the last gig. Not just the silky smooth lines of her legs, mind you. All the way on up, in a way that probably wasn't exactly Avalon custom if even the gorgeous mice people had a layer of fuzz all over, until she was as smooth as the rest of her even at the center of her wide hips. And even playing the part of little miss exhibitionist didn't keep her blood from hitting her cheeks with that same nervousness that alcohol had always had a huge part in eradicating for her so she could actually enjoy afterparties without all that inhibited worrying crap that otherwise would have gone along with it.

"So hey, now we've both seen it all," she said with a too-casual shrug and smirk to try to mask her mortification if he wasn't even interested in evening up the score, much less the more casual mortification of being outside and naked which was going to take this right back into living nightmare territory if she ended up being late to turn her homework in next or something equally dumb like that. "You got an extra peek, I got some pics, I figure that balances out," she suggested, flicking the soap up into her palm with a lift of her eyebrows.

"Not gonna complain if you want to be a gentleman while I get sudsy, though," she suggested before turning to head the rest of the way down the bank, the easy, natural shifting of her weight far more prominent in the feminine curves of her own gorgeously (if entirely unathletic) shaped ass when there was nothing between her and his eyes. And to be honest .. Anna wasn't gonna complain too much herself if he didn't want to be a gentleman, either. As long as it meant he was gonna be slow about getting dressed, anyway.

She bit her lower lip as she waded into the water and glanced over her shoulder through her thick brown hair at him.

.. not going to complain too much if she got a rise out of him, for that matter, because okay, fine, she's fucking shallow, but you try looking at a dick that size and not hoping you could get the blood pumping at least enough to get an idea of what it looked like rarin' to go. Not much of a chance for Mr. "willowy whomprat" up there, maybe, when presented with her fatass self (beauty was so clearly in the eye of the beholder, and mirrors always damn lied to her), but it was definitely going to eat her up inside for a good long while if she never got an idea of the answer.
 
He couldn't stop staring, gawping quietly.
"I, uh... You're... I..." oh my, the little trooper was becoming the big trooper rather rapidly as he stumbled over himself, sitting on the ground. "You're beautiful." he managed, flushing heavily, with a rather respectable half-chub. "I, uh... I'll... I should get going," he said, making no action to do so. "I mean..." oh dear, was this poor guy totally unused to dealing with normal girls?
 
Anna had fully expected Frederick to finish getting dressed and take a hike like a good soldier, even if she had practically invited him to stick around with her deeds if not her words. What she hadn't expected was to look back up the bank and see that she'd ended up making Arkansas ten flavors of dumbstruck somehow, even while she performed a neat little pirouette of her bare feet into the (already nicely temperature controlled, thanks to whatever cold source brought it down here to be warmed by the sun) river that put her knees together and brought her down into a crouch that made it far easier for use her thighs as a brief soap-holder while she got both hands down and started to scoop some of the bubbling water up and over her head.

Shining and glistening wet, as it turned out, wasn't really all that big of a deterrent when it came to getting people not to notice you. Anna's skin practically glowed, between the sunlight and the reflections off of the water beneath her, and it was hard not appreciate that anyone might've looked 50% hotter just standing in that particular place in the river and taking a quick soak. It was kinda what had happened when she'd peeked around to see him after all.

"Hey, c'mon, flattery gets you everywhere but I'm not the first naked chick you've ever seen or something, right?" Anna ended up yelling back at him as cagily as she was able while pumping up the volume to be heard over the soft river which sounded far louder once she was actually in it. Lathering the soap readily against her hands, well, that wasn't a good way to divert attention away from the way that her biceps bumped and jostled against her breasts from the motion and sent them once again into supple, slippery combat versus the laws of physics and entropy. Honestly, the suddenly blushing-virgin act was making her feel like she might've made some bad choices if she was apparently blowing his mind like this. Rat people, right? .. but then again, there was no telling how many humans he'd seen in the past year.

Maybe as many dudes his size that she'd seen at cheap bars who actually lived up to the myth when she got their pants down, come to think of it. Freddy might've been the first damn one who actually packed down below what he was packin' up above, and not in the way she usually would've used that to call someone a dickhead.

As promised, she didn't spend too long in the river, just a quick, refreshing scrub before it was back up to the bank -- as glistening and water-dripping as a nymph, and all, though naiads didn't tend to look around for a towel first thing. ".. well, shit," she muttered in realization that she hadn't thought this cunning plan all the way through, since wet legs and leather britches sounded like the worst combination she could've come up with right then and there.
 
"I, uh... We could... R-relax for a bit." he offered, resisting mightily the urge to touch her, hold her, kiss her... do many, many other things. "Besides, so long as you're not dressed, I'll... uh, join you. It's not a bad feeling."

Really, the warm sun felt good, the fresh cool breeze and the soft grass only helped. The world around them was so natural, and Freddy smiled at her nervously, offering the ground near him. "Reminds me a little of home. I grew up really far from the city. So there were these huge areas where it was almost wilderness entirely." he laughed, "And... Because I was alone, I'd go skinny dipping. And then use the excuse of drying off to just... wander around."
 
"Yeah, but I've got this prickly feeling that Speaks is going to wonder where the hell we are," Anna muttered with a quick bite of her lower lip and a glance down the way she'd come from. But then she took another look at Frederick, and well ..

Fucking Christ girl, you're like a schoolgirl on career day when the hot firefighter talks about the importance of stop drop and rolling. His almost casual lounging was as calming as his hot to trot musculature and hung-like-a-bull bait and tackle were tempting to have her just hang out for a bit, but as much as she was flushing from cheek to clavicle as she continuously remembered just how naked they were and how she barely knew this dude. Which was par for the course for her, but not sober.

Skeptical but swayed by the company and, almost more importantly, the warm sun, soft grass, and cool breeze, Anna settled down on turned legs with a not entirely carefree folding of her arms across her nipples. Which in fairness, was like a twig trying to dam up a waterfall if she was actually trying to be modest instead of trying to stave off the chill of the breeze causing the morning peaks to rise against the sun, or something equally poetic to refer to "stiff nipples". It was nice though. She could admit that much, no matter how odd it seemed, or how much she was not quite so idyllically wondering how much of his dick she could fit --

Well, put the brakes on that train of thought. Or they might never make it back to breakfast. "So you're like some kind of naked Forrest Gump," she decided based on his pleased memories of wandering around backwoods Arkansas. "Count me out on that one, I guess. I think I prefer things not .. jiggling so much all over," she muttered. Sure, it was fun watching his eyes dip and his cock rise, but that's all it really was. A bit of fun while the sun worked its magic.

She could just tell that if it was anything else, she was totally going to break this sweet boy's heart, even if he was totally okay with just being used for his body. .. which given the mouse temple thing, it sounded like yeah, he might've been.
 
"You, uh... Later, we could... Uhm..." he flushed, unable to finish the thought and getting dressed. It was interesting to watch, the practiced motions as he slapped on the armor and fastened it. He handed Anna her clothes, helmet hiding his blush. "Sometime, uh... share... a tent, maybe. Nothing.... Nothing serious, just... S-s-some fun." he said, then practically fled.
 
Anna took her clothes from him with a small smirk, lifting her eyebrows while she held them in front of her lap and just watched him go ahead and get dressed with an almost OCD sort of meticulousness. He definitely strapped those things up exactly the same way every day so far as she could see, probably a result of his time with the mouse-culture and all their apparent military-correctness. Still, it was almost as fun to see the various ways he looked mostly undressed, then partially undressed, and then fully dressed, with the way she practically didn't even need a special monocle to see exactly what he had goin' on under there in her mind's eye anymore.

"Hey, blowies are fun, right? I like a challenge," she tossed up at his helmeted face with a sharp little grin, half expecting she might see steam actually rocketing out of the various holes and pores in the armor from appearing amicable toward his proposal. "Be right there," she all but sing-songed as he went hurrying back toward their little camp. Exhaling with a shake of her head, Anna leaned back with an almost too-luxuriant stretch before she got out of the grass in order to get herself all properly dressed up too, still a little bit damp, but more or less ready to go and head back in Freddy's wake.
 
Helmet on, he handed her her meal. His faceplate was open so he could eat, but his face was red, Speaks seeming quite smug through the whole meal. It was nothing special, but filling and nourishing. As soon as they finished, he gathered the plates and placed them back in the cart, having already set up the tents. A distant forest began to rise, but a chasm opened between them and the destination.

The first thing she might notice was the wooden hut next to the stonework bridge across. The second thing was the first humans she'd seen since coming here, aside from Freddy. One of them, more slender than Freddy, but taller, built like a swimmer, had a long rapier on his belt, and a handsome face marred with a massive scar on his cheek, burned in - a brand of a closed fist. Freddy's hand rested on his own sword as the branded man began to approach. His hair was long and black, his eyes, bright green and intense.

Anna would know his type, probably. An actual, real career criminal, the sort of man who knew what he wanted and took it without much question. He wore heavy armored leathers, patched many times from many beasts, with bits of metal here and there. One of his allies, men in hooded cloaks, held a crossbow, another, sword and shield. Okay, a career criminal with a sprinkle of leader.

"An Abider." Speaks said quickly, as he approached, "A criminal who chooses religious service over a jail sentence. Or any sentence. Most take it to evade a death sentence."
 
Whatever awkwardness Speaks might've expected to crop up between the two humans when he'd gone and sent Anna specifically to grab Freddy while he was bathing, Anna herself seemed to give no sign of it whatsoever. Sure her hair was wet, her pale skin looking a bit nicer in the morning sun, and Freddy might as well have just been Reddy for a good little while, but she had a poker face to rival anyone on ESPN6. If the Kobold wanted to let his Koboldy little brain curl up and have a seat at the idea that more canoodling had fallen into Arkansas' lap, well .. she wasn't here to be slut-shamed by a pangolin, one way or another. Besides, she still felt almost bad for the guy. Bein' that built and that shy and nice was a hard combination for Anna to wrap her head wholly around, the sort of crowds she herself usually ran in.

.. completely unlike the Abider, as it turned out. They hadn't made it all that far down the path, Anna holding her hat in one hand and absentmindedly brushing her hair with her fingers as they walked with the other so that it dried out nice and evenly in the sun, when they made it up to the clear gap in the world that was going to block their path like a riddle-master from a Monty Python movie she hadn't even seen. Blasphemy, yeah, whatever.

"Is every dude around here hot? Am I swinging for the wrong Avalon team?" she muttered, probably thinking it was to herself. She underestimated how quiet things had gotten without Freddy's armor or their cart clanking and groaning slightly during their walk now that they had stopped and ended up being audible to both her companions. ... oh well, see above about all the fucks she gave.

Hot or not, she could've sworn he'd tried to pawn a cheap HDTV off on her once. Or if not him, someone a whole helluva lot like him, not necessarily in the hair or face, but definitely in the swagger and the way he started comin' up to their crappy little band of world-saviors. And while Speaks pointed out exactly what the guy was, Anna darted her eyes quickly between him and Freddy before she twisted her top hat up onto her head and then showed both of her empty palms.

"Woah, hey, your name is Speaks-with-Strangers. Think this one is all you, buddy," she suggested.
 
Strangers sighed as the man approached.
"None of yeh are to pass. Two reasons." he said, "One, y'all is filthy heathens, supporting beastly gods, denying the one true god of Law. And two, the bridge is unstable. Can't have it breakin' under the feet of knaves, beasts, and whores."

Freddy growled, hand on his sword. Easily as tall as the man, who laughed. "Do a thing and I'll fill ye with bolts." he thumbed the men behind him, weapons drawn. "Unless... I'd heard things from law, yanno. That the lady here's a bard. Mayhaps we can allow passage with a... Show."
 
"Hey! Dude! That's not cool," Anna snapped almost immediately as the Abider decided to pigeonhole their group into three neat little categories. "Just cause he's kinda easy doesn't mean he's a whore," she said in defense of Freddy's honor.

She chanced a look over toward Speaks, about to ask whether or not there was any good chance that they could just find another bridge to pass over or if they could walk until the chasm narrowed out to where they could walk around or just, you know, jump over. Somethin' told her from his frustrations and the lay of the land though that it would be an awfully long hike if they were going to try to take the long route.

"Hey hey hey, no getting us shot," she nudged Freddy softly with a whisper. To be honest, she didn't feel especially threatened by the guys so much as inconvenienced, so she didn't take a lot of time before deciding to go ahead and step forward when called upon. Damnit, this really WAS Speaks' job description wasn't it? If you want something done right ..

"Look, fellas, yeah, I can play a tune. Ooooooone little problem, 'cause the gods that be holy or whatever kinda forgot to not lose my damned instrument."

.. an infernal bard, at that?

"So, until I can convince them to fedex it to me or get me a new one? Kinda hard to put on a gig. But that doesn't mean I'm gonna leave you fellas without the gift of my music," she promised as she theatrically whisked her hat off of her head, putting it horizontally in front of her to reach in and fish out her discman, the headphones trailing out and swinging down toward her knees from the cord. She flipped the CD player slightly, checking that the blank CD-R was peeking through the window before she put her hat back on, gathered the headphones into her hand with a flip of her finger, and held them out toward the Abider in open invitation.

"Here, put these on. You'll hear your show," she offered with a genuine smile and a wiggle of the headphones. Sure, they hadn't pressed a professional album or anything, but she pretty much always kept their band's demo disc in the mix just in case she happened to meet the right person at the wrong time.
 
(( Aww geez ))

He blinked at the sound, mouth agape, but the other two had different ideas.

"Boss! Boss!" one called, then leveled the bow. "Alright, enough fuckin' ab-" he started, but he found that his crossbow had been broken in half. Before the other could even draw, he was kicked down, sword at his neck. Freddy, in his element, was shockingly fast.

"Sorry." he said, chuckling, as Speaks simply beaned the other with his staff, knocking him out.

"Hey!" the man regained his senses, whirling about and pulling the things from his ears. He moved fast, and his brand glowed. He came right for Anna, anger on his face.Freddy couldn't move, keeping his man down, and Speaks wasn't fast enough!
 
The music was, it had to be said, nothing quite like what anyone from Avalon would have been familiar with. It was a cacophonous mess of male and female vocals, recorded at a bitrate that left everything somewhat muddy and scratchy, with instrumentation banging percussively underneath the strum and screech of electric strings.

It sounded like goddamn home to Anna, even just grinning while she heard it from the bleed-through of her crappy little headphones. "It's SWEET, right?" she demanded of the Abider, despite the fact that he probably wouldn't be able to discern what she was saying over the noise in his ears any more than he would be able to properly hear the other men trying to get his attention. In fact, Anna barely even saw the other one start to move in order to stop 'fuckin' about' and start 'gettin' real' before a blur of sound and motion took Frederick from one spot to the next, and the thug was down on the ground.

"Hey, hey, I thought we were all being cool here," Anna protested, not exactly sure if she was protesting her companions or his while Speaks took out the other one. Looking to either side helplessly while the Abider pulled the headphones off, letting them swing back toward Anna where she was still holding the Discman in one hand and the hat in her other, she realized that shit was going down whether she wanted it to or not. So much for the diplomatic approach!

.. or, for that matter, the approach where they managed to go after the worst threat first. Anna squeaked and dropped both her hat and CD player, desperately ducking as quick as her not-exactly-quick frame would allow her while simultaneously stumbling backwards with a few clumsy steps that didn't put all that much distance between her and the Abider.

Outclassed by a pangolin in the footwork department. She was never going to live this down.
 
Someone laughed.

It didn't have a source, not really, as the hat landed brim-up. The Abider's foot landed inside the brim - his sword arcing down to sever a few laces of her top as he rocketed down, letting out a cry as the hat tipped forward and his head slammed into the rocky earth.

...Victory? Anna recieved a few texts, from Clown: All of them stating he was pleased. None of the other gods seemed to have anything to say about the encounter, but Freddy leaned down and spoke in a quiet tone before letting his enemy go, watching him flee. It seemed that was that, Freddy sighing.
"Too damn close." he said with a sigh. "Sorry, Anna. I should have been, shoulda been faster." he said, sheathing his weapon.
"Your speed and strength are phenominal, Freddy, no one questions that. But... well, your intent is lacking." he said, poking the one he sat on. "Your sword is made to kill people, right? So why restrain it and make it useless?"

"But..."

"Bah! Sheltered outsiders." Speaks grumbled. "Your heart's as soft as a baby's scales." he said, pulling the cart over the unconscious Abider, pulling the hat from his leg. "And you, you've the Clown's own luck."
 
Anna stood with her hands up, eyes wide, and breath quick for several seconds before she tucked her leather boot forward and kind of quietly kicked the Abider in the head. I mean, not THAT hard, but just to make sure he was actually completely out of it. Flicking her fingers downward to where her cleavage had ended up damn near spilling outward like one of those damn ren faire girls she'd been worried about the bodice making of her -- so much for its total snugness, though it still fit relatively well -- she could at least be glad that that was as far as the sword had gone.

"I kinda hate this place," she muttered, feeling her phone buzz. She checked it, shaking her head. Cool, so the weird dream guy was happy, that was something. .. although, what had he said? Oh goddamnit. That had better not have been her one get out of jail free card! She had totally done her own badass rescuing, with the quick thinking about that hat thing, and .. alright, so, maybe it had been dumb luck, but she preferred that over the idea that a God had just saved her own dumb-ass.

"It's fine, Freddy, you were kinda like the Flash and shit. And I don't think he kills people either? Or is that Batman only?" she mused while gathering up her CD player and shutting it off, reaching out to take the hat thankfully from Speaks and tuck it inside. His comment about the Clown's own luck just caused her to purse her lips again however, not wanting to bring up how true that might have been.

".. so, bridge time?" she offered helpfully, fidgeting to try and fix her severed laces once she had the hat perched back atop her head before she realized she didn't even want to risk making it worse. She could deal with a little .. jiggliness. It'd probably make Freddy amusingly distracted, after all.
 
"Yeah." Freddy said, sheathing his blade as they crossed. The forest was just beyond, and night was approaching. "Oh god." he said, looking up. And he was right to. These trees were something else.

There were old growth forests on Earth, of course. Trees big enough to have a tunnel for cars in the middle. Tall enough to rival some skyscrapers. But they were small, compared to these massive things. The great pillars of wood defied realism and probability, stretching into the sky a dizzying height. It was no wonder it was visible from so far off, they went up forever, it seemed. Bridges of wood and rope stretched and yawned between them, and on the closer trees, platforms were built as well or even homes. The canopy glittered with soft blue lights of these places, and she might make out what seemed to be birds all over.

Until one landed.

A young man, maybe fourteen, fluttered his way down imperfectly.
"Ah... Ah! V-visistors!" he said happily. He was soon joined by two armored men, also winged, who bore long lances.
"No, milord. Not just visitors. The Chosen." he sighed, pulling off his helmet. Oh man. It was like Legolas and Aragorn had a perfect, rugged love-child. His features were delicate, but he had the bearing and style of one who had seen tons of combat. His body was that of a swimmer's, not buff like Freddy, at least, as much as she could tell through his shining armor. "I am Elohand." he said, "And I am the cleric of this people, as well as their captain of the guard. You should return to the festivities, milord Alex." he ruffled the boy's hair with a soft smile, "I will see that they are handled."

"But Sir Elo..."

"I insist. I hear Miss Shiela is making her wine..."

"Y-yes..." he said, flushing and flying off.

"So then! Welcome to our home, Chosen." Elo said with a smile.
 
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