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Just Correct: Me, plain and simple

Ruphhausin

Ruphhausin

Supernova
Joined
Jul 2, 2009
A while back, I attempted to start a rant based journal, but I have made the realization that life is more than ranting. It is more than being closed off whatever. I took a long think this afternoon, and I came to a really important realization.

I am tired. I am just going to be me, and not what someone wants me to be, and the real me is not someone who is going to back away from simple truth about anything. I am not going to spend time needlessly explaining myself, nor am I going to ever again back away from things I say. I may explain them, but I am not going to take things back if they are true, and even if they are about me.

I also am not going to always ignore what is wrong with me when there are things wrong. I am not perfect, and never said I was, but there are still things that can be made better. No one is perfect, but sometimes it takes someone outside of you who knows you to show you where you have really gone askew, and I just have to work on that.

Only someone who actually knows me gets the privilege of telling me that sort of thing, and to people who know me I thank for that help. As for this journal, it is going to be a window into my life, and the realities of what I have to deal with every day. No apologies if you cannot handle it and decided to read it all on your own.
 
Today is, for lack of a better word, interesting.

Work has been very good, pleasing in that things are doing very good for the first few days of the year. Had to deal with a woman I call "The Russian" as she is from there again, and she is, to say the least, amusing. She for the longest time was very confused on words, making conversation hard as she would do things like mix up the words "masturbate" and "masticate". She is doing much better, but she still is working on it, which mad the meeting much more sane than it used to be.

Lunch was really good, as I love sushi. Really good and really fresh, making it an absolute pleasure. Flavorful tuna always hits the spot, though there was more than that in the sushi. Green tea is really good with it, especially when it is sweetened with orange blossom honey, and I got to share it with my lady too, which really was good.

I also got a call from my family, as I am getting closer with them these days, after some very intense issues last year, but that is for another time. I was thanked for the gifts, especially about the car, but again, more on that later.

The main issue today was dealing with people who really are the embodiment of "take the beam out of your own eye" ideal. I am really not a fan of those who think that in small it is okay, but in larger ways/action it is not. That opens the door to permit exaggeration, something I am not too keen on myself. The only time it is permitted is when something has to be made obvious when for too long it has been ignored, though most of the time by the time that happens, little exaggeration is needed.

One of the people we have had to deal with has not made any real attempt to honor their end of an agreement, which is part of a schedule that involves others in their similar position. This person was explained this time and again, yet it didn't get through. Thanks to the help that I mentioned in the first post, I got the point across that, thanks to this person's inaction, there were three others delayed who had gotten off their duffs and done what they were supposed to.

"Aren't you being..." No, not when I realized I was doing it, nor was I doing it about the same agreement. Still, in order to understand it, however, you have to have been shown you are doing it. It still doesn't excuse it, because in reality, it is the same thing just about something else.

I am not perfect, just saying that sometimes admit it does give more passage for understanding.
 
Allow me a little delving into Pop Culture, and the harshness of the way things are.

As someone who knows the literary side of things, let me use this metaphor.

This is the 50th/60th anniversary of James Bond, the movie franchise's popularity and the literary history. That being said, there are many who criticize the start of the $1 Billion and counting earning "Skyfall". The butt hurt are saying how "not like Sean Connery" Daniel Craig is as Bond, but in truth, Craig, much like George Lazenby, Timonthy Dalton, and Pierce Brosnan, is much closer to the literary Bond, and it is welcome for those who only enjoyed the Connery and Roger Moore films for their over the top things, but they were all good for what they were.

Now, for what that means in the real world that I have had to deal with today. Truth, like character, is greatly dependent on one's point of view. Plain and simple. Our lives shade it, and many times what we think is criticism or support are actually the very opposite. Sometimes people want you to fix something that is perfectly fine, or want to show you something that, though many have thought it just fine is totally unacceptable. The line is not invisible, but it is very thin.

Projected the illusion that everything is fine, the entire "fake it till you make it" ideal is just not ever going to bear fruit either. Sean and Roger, for example, are just as good of actors as George, Timothy, Pierce, and Daniel, no argument. The truth is in the details that they are being supported for different takes on the same character, and some are closer to how the vision was for the creator, Ian Fleming, than others. The details matter to one who nitpicks, but not to most, and that makes those like me, who are paid to play devil's advocate on a daily bases, ecstatic.

In the past, I defended or clarified things I wrote, especially on here. I won't anymore. Long or short, detailed or vague, not going to do it anymore. It is draining, and in all honesty, with very few exceptions, I don't owe it to most people under most circumstances. I don't do it where I get paid, and I no longer do it with my family and friends in real life, so why here. I am just me, and that is who I am going to be.

I admit, I love to offend self-righteous people, especially when they have painted this nice picture 'of themselves. They are the kind of person who would paint a huge read dot in the middle of a white canvus, hang it in a museum, and have people come around and humm, haw, OO, Ahh, and murmur about it while a really decent picture is passed up and criticized. Me, I would walk right up to the "artist" and ask him if he got permission from the government of Japan to steal their flag to call it art.

I don't think it is okay to be nasty, but the truth is not about nice, it is simply about truth. Something on here reminded me of that, and I do thank that person from the bottom of my heart. The reality is that telling someone "I told you so" can only be justifiably called being snide and pompous when it is not true. When the person REALLY DID tell you so, and there was no malice or meanness involved... you just have to take it they did. It's not nice. It's not sweet. It's not painless. It's definitely not fair. Fair, though, is only in the dictionary between fail and faith, and fair also applies to why that person told you what they did even when they are right. If they did it because they care, and there is no personal past history stuff involved, then you have to owe up to they told you. If they have issues... then... well... there in lies the rub.

Does that give me license not to admit being wrong? No, but it also goes back to the Phantom Tollbooth axiom: "It is better to do the wrong thing for the right reason than to do the right thing for the wrong reason." It is always good to do the right thing for the right reason... but I see little of that from some types of people. Not judging, but then I don't have to.
 
Finally starting to get why some people have told me to let some things lie, especially after they are said and written.

I have learned that there are always going to be defensive people, especially those who suffer from offensensitivity. Now, I borrow that word from Berkley Breathed's classic comic strip Bloom County, but it still holds true for today. The problem, I also have learned, is that some go so far to one side that they are offended by everything... but then there are those who don't get upset about anything.

I would take the person who gets offended easily over someone who is offended by nothing. It is that simple.
 
This is starting to be a very interesting day, to say the least, but as I am taking each day as it having something in it to learn from, here is today's thought.

Most people go throughout the day in dire need of a reality check, plain and simple. It really is mind-boggling how many people think that some things don't or never apply to them, yet the reverse is opposite. It doesn't help that the generation ahead of me, as well as the generation behind me have me and those of mine sandwiched between them like the intelligent, common sense rich cream filling between the Oreo cookies of Enlightened Imbeciles of the 1960s and 1970s and the Educated Idiots of the mid- 1980s through the 1990s.

I deal with people who feel "entitled" all the time. I see it in the faces of people who think that if they can put five sentences that make reasonable sounding thought together they should be published writers, and that is not true. Many times, the public shouldn't get what they want, especially when that public excuses disturbed behavior masquerading as "liberated thinking" or "freedom of choice". Sorry, but that is just not true.

I am not scared to say it, but responsibility is very scarce in the entertainment world, especially in the publishing field. I am not saying I know everything, but I know lack of responsibility when it is there. But that is a dirty word nowadays, which is hidden by calling someone biased, bigoted, or intolerant. No, it is not. That is one of the reasons why the criticism from some people on bigger issues like religion, gender differences, the Constitution, and the like are met with fierce attacks and not understanding. Most of those who criticize or attack things in those areas, I have come to see, do so out of their own drive to, on some level, get out of taking responsibility. Avoiding responsibility and consequences is the national hobby of many, and getting paid for it is big business.

A loud mouth comedienne who says politically and socially charged things, but thought she would die before she every had to face dealing with her words and surprised when she didn't drop dead "on time" ... a singer in a musical genre not only badmouthing her own country but the very genre of music she was making a living at getting surprised at how militantly she was swiftly vilified and told to "shut up and sing"... a mother who murdered her own child, getting away with it, but still facing the wrath of justice and "hiding out"... an elected official barely winning office and then having to face the fact that he will have to produce real results and not expect "spin" to keep him from being seen as "the worst ever so far"... All of those happened in my lifetime, and more. It just finally hit me today, as I finished cleaning up the mess the former employee left, that there is a reason why things are the way they are.

There is an expectation of balance, and no one wants balance. That is the basis of human nature without something there to help steer it. Like a ship without a sail, helm, or rudder, most people go through the waters of life thinking that floating works, but it doesn't. I had to learn that lesson, and no, not learning that is a problem and comes back to bite on the ass of all involved including the person who didn't learn that life is about responsibility. People want a "fair life", but fair would mean picking and choosing what we learn or have to deal with, and life is not like that. It just isn't for anyone.

There are more people on here and boards like it who get that than I deal with out in the supposed real world. Sad.. but then it is starting to become very expected.
 
Did you ever have one of those days where all of the observations of your favorite comedian just popped up and just explained it all?

Comedians have a thin veil, as most of them are commenting about real life. The issue is that with few exceptions, most all comedians/comediennes have an all too thin agenda with their comedy. The best ones, though.. the ones that people remember forever... are those that hit reality on the head. They are also the ones who sometimes are not always appreciated while they are still around, or are long after they stop touring and have been famous for a long time.

Don Rickles, knowing as "Mr. Warmth", is a comedian that was fearless in the realm of telling jokes that, today, are seen as "hurtful", "bigoted", and mean... simply because their punchlines were the truth. That is the problem that I had to deal with today, and I just realize it is why my give-a-damn is busted. Too many people love to conceal the truth behind labeling things as "hating" or "envy" or "incorrect", but there are just some things that are true.

A writer whom we have had long-term history with my workplace writes what can be termed "erotica", and his fiction primarily is focused on presenting what I feel is the truest depiction of BDSM as a balancing act all the way through. He has been in some legal "trouble" recently, which in reality is a typical threat from someone who is far to into mistaken notions about the lifestyle. That was her first mistake, this female who attempted to threaten the writer with legal action. The second was she didn't count on yours truly there at the table during the meeting. She opened her mouth, and I let her insert her foot up to her shin... then I preceded to inform her that I was active in the lifestyle, wrote stories myself (don't worry.. I didn't speak about this or other boards as there seems to be a history of people with their noses so far raised up their heads are in their asses showing up and.... you get the picture there..), and that I personally KNOW she was full of it. There is nothing like the empty threat of someone either trying to stir up trouble to get their name in the news or to hijack someone's livelihood for a piece of it getting obliterated in front of them. It really is quite magical, I have to say.
 
Today was actually one of the best days in a while. My fiance and I got to enjoy our respective jobs without any sort of hitch, and we got to lunch and spent the time enjoying our Thai food and were not hurried at all. When I got back to work, there were some calls to answer and make, and a few of the manuscripts to give a final go over, but other than that, it was spectacularly mellow and calm. I got to get home on time, another rarity, and then I was able to enjoy a very nice lasagna dinner with her and now everything is just mellow and calm.

It really is a bit strange, as "normal days" that are pictures of everything going smoothly are just not what I am used to. I am used to the insanity of life imitating the demented ideas of those who deserve to be locked up, those concepts of "normal" are what I am used to seeing. Today was one of those "Kodak Moment" days, which are rare but something I cherish and am thankful for. It makes me happy to just be alive and be me, makes me want to stop and smell all the flowers and breathe in deep the bliss of life and exhale it slowly as I cherish it again.
 
My niece and nephew are a hoot, especially when they are "unleashed" on people who are just not prepared for how mature and intelligent for their ages they are.

A perfect example happened yesterday afternoon in the ballet class that my nephew and I are taking together. He has been in it for helping with his sports, and I have been taking it with him because he and I have been needing things to do together that are just for him and I, and in the class there has always been this woman who, to put it mildly, makes some of those "dance moms" and the like pale in comparison. She also, to put it mildly, thinks she herself is more than she is, and my patience, as well as that of both teachers and most of the parents there, was wearing thin with both of them, even her own husband.

The class was about over, and my nephew, who is friends with several of the other students, especially the girls (seriously, at his age he could charm the micro-skirt off a female celebrity in nothing flat.... I don't know WHERE he gets is from *whistles and looks around innocently*), and he was chattering away to one of his teachers and a few of them, and for some reason the woman and her daughter (the girls name is Kelly, her dad's is Richard, and I have no desire at all to learn her mother's name at all.. again, I cannot imagine why...) felt they were not getting enough attention even though they had hogged ALL of the teachers' attention during all of the thirty minute break before the class and both of the ten minute breaks between changes between the exercises and the actual dance instruction.

The woman and her spawn came over and the girl looked at my nephew and said:

"You know, this class is NOT just about you and how you are doing." (nose literally in the air)

My nephew: "No, it's not. Nor do I make it about me every chance I get, Kelly. You are doing that just fine."

The woman, of course, was agast, and said to my nephew and me.

"How dare you?!?!? Do you know how long m daughter has been doing this and what potential she has?"

My niece, who is sixteen and came in to take up for both her brother and uncle before I could do ANYTHING, made it clear.

"No ma'am, he doesn't. But he DOES know that I have been doing dance of ALL KINDS since I was three, and he knows, just like I, my uncle, and everyone else in this room, including your obviously to ALL OF THE REST OF US long-suffering husband, that she is not as good as you two think she is. Having skill, talent, looks, or money gives you two the right to think the universe revolves around the both of you."

The moment of silence really would have been more awkward if she hadn't finished up with....

"And by the way, ma'am. If you are going to dye your daughter's hair.. make certain the backyard matches the front."

We haven't gotten a call back so we are going to be going to class at our regular time today... though I imagine two people will not be there anymore... though when I left there was a smile on Richard's face that made him look like the Joker.
 
This is a short one, today, as the rest of my day has been so very good.

One of the girls in our office, a college student, asked me why is it that there are so many guys that treat her and other women so badly. She gave me the harangue about not calling, only focusing on sex, lack of "romance", never wanting to do things they want to do, refusing to deal with their (the gf/fiancee/wife/etc) friends all the time, and not wanting to clean up (get dressed fancy is what that means in translation). She asked me because, in her opinion, I am not "overly sensitive but I relate the truth." I have to say I was taken aback, especially as a lot of people don't like how direct I am with the truth. I kind of avoided it for a bit, taking advantage of a meeting I really had to go to and then with her being busy. I had to really think about if I, as a 38 year old man, with the personality I have, wanted to tell a 20 year old young woman, not having experienced a lot of life, that much truth.

Trust me when I say, that was something I don't always do. Not many people I am that direct with deserve that level of consideration. I am, as a rule, direct and to the point, though I do notice frequently (sorry to all females here, but it is from your corner I get this all the time) that my words are twisted to mean things that they don't mean. It is why I try to deliver succinct and simple truth, not just as I see it but as others do as well. It comes from a bit of my educational background, as by the time I am either asked for the truth or I HAVE to give it, it is a pipe bomb and someone always gets hurt because it gets ignored far too long. I also don't believe in the idea that "it's easy to tell the truth if you don't care about anybody you are telling the truth to", because if you REALLY care, you will tell the truth. Sometimes I forget that about myself, but I am only human.

I will tell her after lunch what she wants to know.. I just hope she is up for it.
 
Well, everything here is sunshine and rainbows again, even though I now have a newly single person in the office.

Yes, I did tell that young woman what she wanted to know, and it seems to actually have been good. Normally not be pleased that I just caused the end of a relationship, but the guy was a an overbearing assmonkey... plus, he was apparently not as good in bed as he thought he was. Of course, getting to call the cops to make him leave the premises was even more fun, but I am really just glad she is getting out of that piss poor "relationship".

For once.. I don't have too much to say. lol However.. the day is not over..... LOL
 
(This can be filed under "So Right It Had To Be Shared..... also.. I will be posted what I told the young woman later.....lol)


Dave Barry is a Pulitzer Prize-winning humor columnist for the Miami Herald.
Colonoscopy Journal:
I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy.
A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis ..Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner.
I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'

I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous.
Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor.

Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons). Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon..

The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result.'

This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.

MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but, have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt.
You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently.
You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep.

The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked..

Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere.. I was seriously nervous at this point.
Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.

There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate.

'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.

'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, ABBA was yelling 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that IT was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.


On the subject of Colonoscopies...
Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'

2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'

3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'

4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'

5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'

6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'

7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'

8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'

9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'

10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'

11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'

12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay.'

And the best one of all:
13.. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?
 
Ruphhausin said:
............................................................................................

One of the girls in our office, a college student, asked me why is it that there are so many guys that treat her and other women so badly. She gave me the harangue about not calling, only focusing on sex, lack of "romance", never wanting to do things they want to do, refusing to deal with their (the gf/fiancee/wife/etc) friends all the time, and not wanting to clean up (get dressed fancy is what that means in translation).

.............................................................................................

I will tell her after lunch what she wants to know.. I just hope she is up for it.
Click to expand...

I know I waited a couple of days to share the second half of the events of that day, but It wasn't until I finished lunch today that I realized that I may have given that young woman the best and most honest advice she will ever get, because she sure as hell was never going to get it from her "friends".

I sat her down in my office and took her step by step what she had asked, and the truthful answer, not one that was shaded but rather simple and succinct truth.

Keep in mind that "guys" and men ARE NOT THE SAME. You asked me to tell you about what "guys" do, so I just want you to keep that in mind.

1. "Guys" don't call because that is what a "guy" is about: what he wants when he wants it, and he is always trying to control the relationship at this point. Remember that you are dealing with a 18-26 year-old hound, not a real man when you are talking about an average "college recruitment poster guy". They want you always in the frame of mind that your purpose is to please them, and what you want doesn't matter.

2. "Guys" are about sex, and however they can get it. Not to stir up trouble, but if you are dating a "guy" like we are talking about, and he isn't pursuing sex with you all the time, and he is neither spiritual or religious, genuinely mature, or truly committed to you, you are dealing with a Tucker Max or a Mystery. (thankfully, I didn't have to explain who those two POS excuses for human beings are....)

3. A "lack of romance" is really the only thing that isn't solely based on what the "guy" is thinking, but also what you, as the female, perceive as romance. If all you are really wanting is cuddling on the couch, a bouquet once in a while, a picnic in the park, or a once a week chick flick... and he cannot even go for that... then you are not in a relationship you are either "the beard" or the "safety" for certain friends and family members to meet. (again.. didn't have to explain those terms....)

4. "Guys" never want to do what you college girls want, because it is not comfortable. Most of what you want to do involves manners, letting others talk, places they don't want to go, money they don't want to shell out (even if it is not that expensive), and doesn't have a clear path to sex.

5. Refusing to deal with all of the people that you know, actually, isn't just a "guy" thing, as real men are like that as well. For a "guy", yes, it is about avoiding "cock blockage", but for both "guys" and real men it is about not dealing with "the baggage". The biggest lie in relationships is that we (both guys and girls... both men and women) "HAVE TO DEAL" with "baggage". No, we don't. It is a choice. Now, most of the time, if it is not too bad, men will bone up and man up and deal... but not in the extreme cases. The "friend/relative who really wants to break you up so they can get with him/her", the "friend/relative always giving relationship advice who has never had a stable relationship of any kind lasting longer than 3-24 months or multiple marriages that never get to five years", the "clingy/overprotective/controlling relative whose input is never really wanted on "this or that".. you get the picture. Those are strains on a real relationship, so please don't think a "guy" will stick around for that... especially not after sex happens. This is the diciest of all of them, as it really involves both of you (even when it is a "guy" involved) looking at those people and deciding if they are REALLY worth putting strains on ANY kind of relationship... even if it is something like Friends with Bennies.

6. "Guys" NEVER like getting dressed up unless sex is not only involved but is guaranteed like the certainty came down from a Mount divinely etched in stone tablets. BE VERY CAREFUL AND BEWARE OF ANY GUY WHO JUST UP AND AGREES TO GO ANYWHERE, ANY PLACE, OR ANY FUNCTION DRESSED UP. To say that there is most likely ulterior motives is as much of an understatement as saying someone in the path of a tsunami they will experience moisture.

I hate the fact she had to break up with someone, but the "guy" was a tool in the biggest meaning of the term. My lady is setting her up with someone we both know who, though still in college, is a real mature guy.. we hope. lol
 
Today and tonight have been absolutely fabulous!!! I am very serious, but then, I always am when I say that about a day or an night.. or both. But really it has been great. My lady did something so totally unexpected that it truly blows my mind.

The weekend has been, in general, super. My nephew and I did have a great class Friday, and those two harpies were gone. I then had a great riding lesson with my niece, as I am doing something with each of them that is just for me and the one taking the class. Anyway... I dropped them both off, as they wanted to see what the other is doing this week, and then I came home. I opened the front door, and found several arrows directing me through the house.

Following them, I found a few things, fortunately the riding school has showers for the students, and I was able to follow the trail which included very sturdy cuffs, a crop, and a few other items. The end of the trail led me to the bedroom.. where my fiancee was in a Power Girl costume, bound with "Kryptonite" rope, and a note from one of her friend's who helped her saying:

"Happy belated X-mas. 'Lex'."

I will let everyone reading this figure out all that happened after that.....
 
Thank you, Hayvy. It was very intense, and did last all weekend. I will not bore anyone with details unless they are asked for. lol

Today is also good, and today, before I have my lunch, I am putting this up about the day. She is right now kneeling beside me, looking so very cute in nothing but her thigh-high socks and shoes on and nothing else, and being a good girl. She already has fixed lunch like she was told, and now she is waiting for me to "notice" she is there. Her lovely ass has bruises on it, just like her pussy, pelvis, and thighs do from what I did to her last night, and she groveled for every one. It will not be the first time she went the next day to work sore, but she is used to it, just like she is used to being stretched by my taking her lovely ass as I please and in the positions I please.

I will say that the costume is washed now, and will be used again, just now I am pondering what the next one she will do for me will be...
 
I am sitting here, enjoying my lunch that my fiancee brought me like a good girl, and I have to admit that while I am sitting here I think some details about it are worth sharing.

She is still having some trouble sitting down from some of the bruises, but then she loves and wants the bruises.

After I had found her, as stated above, we did the entire "dramatic seen" with her telling me all the stereotypical valiant super-heroine things.

"You will pay for this.... I will never give in... etc"

I enjoyed that part, because she really was giving that part her all and I just let her do that for several minutes, till I put the o-ring gag into her mouth. Her friend was very helpful, as she got someone to get a non-toxic and permanent green color to everything to make it "Kryptonite", and my slave did the whimpering about that very well. Moving her to the Frame which I have, I then rebound her after getting the "white leotard" and cape parts of the costume off (leaving her in the thigh high blue boots and gloves) and started with my "diabolical" fun.

(I pause for a moment as I order her to go get my tea. My boss knows my inclinations, but as long as it doesn't interfere with regular work assignments, no harm no foul... Of course I spank her hard on the pussy as she does have her chastity on with the quiet vibe inside of her right now so she squeals...)

Using a crop I had made out of the flexible end of a fishing pole, I got her in strategic places all over her body while the Frame held a vibe that I had on full against her very lovely pussy, especially of course her clit. I must tell you, forcing an orgasm out of a slave who "refuses" to cum (even when they know to fight it as long as possible for effect) is enormously satisfying. I almost wish I had recorded how intensely she screamed out in pleasure from both the pleasure and pain, but let me just say that the Kink.com people would most likely have wished SHE had been Power Girl in their "Broken Super-Heroines" video. After doing that three times, she of course was begging for me to do.. well... anything....

(I will share more later... as now that I have my tea... I am sending her back to her desk.. though I strongly am perhaps wondering if in part two I should make her recount some of the events.... she of course has to do it on my journal as she is forbidden from being on the boards I am on... I am VERY POSSESSIVE, and that would cause too many conflicts....)



[This day itself is very good, and again, it is going to be a week with very few surprises.... at least for me..... *wickedly smiles and laughs* Only my classes with my nephew and niece are on the table for the week.. other than a VERY special dinner for two on Friday...]
 
It was, and tonight is one as well. I am going through with telling her how she has to put things totally honest, even when they are embarrassing at points. Also, the rest of the day today, both classes as well, went well.

My nephew and I are progressing very nicely in our ballet, and now he and I and her sister are going to start taking one of the defense classes her in town together as well. The two of them have really bonded, and I am glad. I am really proud of my niece, as she has so much that she has come through, and my sister and I are getting along better as well. There will be more on that later, though.
 
I can only simply say that I am profoundly saddened and disappointed. There really is not any other way to put it.
 
Today was my "rebirth"day.

I had dinner with my fiancee and with a friend and her husband.

Actually... and old flame and her husband.. so to speak.

... in fact... she was She Who Enlightened Me.

The name she had for the longest time was Raven, and we met when I was 18 and she was 30. I bought her a drink the first time we met at a bar, and she came over.

There is a story, but the part for now happened today. I was listening to a local radio station, and the DJ came on and stated that he had a dedication to David from Raven, that the Phoenix always will fly in both our worlds. The song was and is Meatloaf's "Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad".

For most of the first nine months, she was Milady and I was the submissive, till the script was flipped three weeks of the last month. She was the first woman I had ever "raped", and she pushed me, causing me to break the barrier of my naive blindness to myself. She did so in ways we never agreed on... and I walked out that night.

It was different.. new... uncharted. I refused to take her calls that week from Sunday to Thursday because we were not the same then. I was angry, feeling betrayed and used to a point, but also feeling a bit played. She never told me that she was a Switch, rather she let me believe she was a Mistress.

That Friday afternoon it was raining, and she was there at the apartment I was staying at. She was wet, soaked.. she had been crying and still was. She didn't say anything, but her eyes said so much. We stood there, under the roofing over the set of stairs going up the other floors, and she was crying.

"I want to hear you say it." It was all I said, and I knew she knew what I wanted to hear. Then she told me, about all the times she wanted it like that, how no one had wanted to.. how too many men bought into how all women bought into all the talk show crap from people like Oprah and that she didn't want it.. that she needed time where she wasn't in control.. that she didn't want it all the time. That she didn't care what the others of her "boys" thought.

"You're the one... I need that.. I need.. need you to be...."

Wet with her hair soaked and the blouse and skirt drenched, showing she had nothing on under them... I took control. I didn't ask her what she wanted, because I told her what she was getting for the next nine months. It was an all the way.. total power exchange. I "raped" her in her office, at a movie theater, "kidnapped" her and took her out to a cabin by a private lake and spent a four day weekend taking her to the depths of what she needed... and that was the first month.

Nine months later, we had to say goodbye. There was a lot that just made it ... not forever. She almost didn't go, and I had to make her get on the plane. By the time I saw her again physically three years later, she had her man, the one she needed to be her husband. But there was still much there, and we still have it.

Dancing with her after dinner tonight... one dance, as always. This time I got to bring my girl, and she got to meet her. She was not jealous, as she saw what was always there and what always should be there. My fiancee and I danced a bit, as Raven and her husband did , till they played our song. We danced, and no one else wanted to be on the floor. It happens every time she is able to come back, and everyone just watched. It wasn't fancy.. it wasn't dirty. It just was.

It was what it was. And it has to be our song.

Two out of three ain't bad.... but it wasn't enough. We do love each other... my Raven and I... but not that way. She's coming to the wedding, because she needs to be there just like I had to be at hers.

I'm not going to be sad.....
 
A list of things that happened today, some of which shouldn't have ever happened, and some long due for happening.

1. Got more done in six hours than most people get done all day in our kind of office.
2. Got stopped at a routine seat belt check, and was given the okay to continue on.
3. Had my lunch disturbed by two people arguing two completely contradictory conspiracy theories at the top of their lungs.
4. Gave a stranded motorist a ride to a service station and didn't get robed, molested in any manner, or brutally murdered.
5. Found a $50 bank error corrected in my favor.
6. My nephew and I were asked to perform at a recital for our ballet class.
7. My niece and I are best in our riding class.
8. My mother FINALLY has stopped telling deliberately embarrassing stories bout my childhood.
9. My biological sperm donor died recently, and he never made any attempt to contact me or my sister ever.
 
Something short and sweet.

I was in the rare position to get to spend part of the day talking to one of the neighborhood kids around her. He was eight, and I didn't know if his parents, who live just up the street, knew if he was down the street as far as he was. I live in a residential neighborhood, one where no one knows which houses living in the area have kinky goings on behind their walls (there are fifteen, so I have never really been alone here....). The boy, who here I call by his initials, K.G., talked up a storm about anything that was on his mind. Apparently, he has to deal with kids in his class that are not at his level. His mom, really nice woman as well, actually had been watching from her car up the street while she was talking to her friend who lived in the area. It was interesting, she said, because she had never seen her son just talk that way outside of anyone other than the family and a handful of friends. She then came and got him to take him to the library, and he smiled and waved goodbye, saying he would be back sometime. At that moment, a certain someone put her arms around me from behind and said those words:

"You are going to make a great dad."

WTF?????

Am I missing something?
 
Today was just like any other day. Not special... not sucking.. jut a day. I wonder if consistency really is that good at times, but then it is balance so perhaps that is as good a thing as anything else. I do know that today was a good day for cooking chili, real chili. The funniest part was having to show my lady that no, beans are NOT "supposed" to be in chili. That does always make me laugh, as no they never were supposed to be in them in the first place and not only are totally unnecessary, but that they RUIN the chili. Sometimes she is so cute.. storming off and "looking it up" when Alton Brown did an entire episode on it proving that to be true.
 
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