Patreon LogoYour support makes Blue Moon possible (Patreon)

Arrangement Of Hearts

When Harold came to tell Tom who was at the door, Tom was puzzled. He figured he would never see her again, and after several painful months had put her out of his mind. He walked to the foyer and seeing her standing there, he said "What is it I can do for you?" He wasn't sure there was any answer she could give him at that moment that would make him want to have anything to do with her. True enough he had hurt her, but not physically, and he had never intended to. He had asked forgiveness, something he had never received, and it had crushed him. The man had lived four months in seclusion speaking to know one. When he had finally recovered enough to resume his business he had been a different person. Hollow and lifeless. His friends wondered if he had been on drugs, and now almost a year later when he was just recovering from the damage, here was the woman standing in his foyer. What could she possibly want now, he thought to himself.
 
“A moment in private please.” She looked at Harold and once he was gone she stepped closer to Tom in order to speak in a tone low enough only for him to hear, “I miss you. I have tried everything I could to move on, some things that I am not so proud of, but I want to try again. The last time I saw you I was sent here by my father. I was not ready for a relationship of the nature you wanted but now I understand you better if only slightly. I have nothing to gain from this and nor do you but understand something, when you got angry like that now words could describe how frightened I was of you. I see how my words could have made you angry but I never want your hands to touch me again when you are angry.”

She paused her shoulders back with dignity as she admitted to him something she felt was a bit hard for her to say and him to take in the event he still cared for her, “I gave my virginity to my dance partner, turns out he is not so gay. After that I did not sleep with another man but I have dated several in the hopes of finding someone who fit me better. I could not. I went away to school but that held no light for me without you in my life to share it. When I kissed you last and told you I could love you I was unaware I already did.” She fell silent her face never dropping and she promised herself no matter what he said or did she would be strong. She waited for him to respond.
 
Tom was struck dumb for a few long moments. He just looked at her in disbelief. "Come in my study", he said. "I need to sit down." He pulled up two upolstered chairs close together in front of the fireplace, and had her sit down, their knees nearly touching.

"I'm not the man you left that day" he said. "I loved you, that's why what you said that day hurt me. I came home and didn't leave this house for four months. It was four more before I could attend to my business. I have not so much as been in the presence of a woman since you left that day in the hotel."

"It will not be easy to trust my heart to you again, and there is no way I can do it unless you will forgive me once and forever for what I did that day, and take me for who I am today. I have lived an empty and hollow life since you left me, and I still love you. But you and I will both make mistakes, and without the ability to forgive, I fear we will just end up in this sad place again."

"I am willing to forgive all that has gone before and accept you as you are , if you will do the same for me." He looked deeply in her eyes and waited to see what she would say. Could she finally forgive?
 
Angela sat back in her chair and shook her head, “I think we shouldn’t bother promising things. That was our problem to begin with I think. I was promised to you then I had to promise to forget you used to sleep with anything and any one you had to promise not to touch me until we were married. Let’s drop the promises and just try to do better than before. No year guarantee or even so much as a mention of what happened before. Let’s start over as a man who wants a girl who want him back.”

The maturity in her response showed the change in her. Her hands ran through the thick black hair with blue streaks and her thick eyeliner made her brilliant eyes appear to look right through him. “Can we just start over? Learn to fall in love again without any say in what the other is or in my case wears? Let me win the hearts of your business partners and clients as I am not as who they think I should be and if you want to sleep around for now I won’t hold you to any obligations to me.”
 
Her answer wasn't what he had expected, but when he thought about it, it was enough. "If you really mean that, I can accept that", he said. "Though I won't promise because we have agreed that we wouldn't, I will tell you I don't intend to sleep around. I haven't been with a woman since I was with you, and I see no reason to change that. I decided a long time ago that if I couldn't have you, I just wasn't interested. So lets just start as a man and woman who want each other back".

"Your room is just as you left it, I haven't changed a thing, and you might be interested to know that the week after you left, the crew arrived to finish the dance studio. Since I wasn't in the mood to argue with them, I let them finish it. It's really very nice, would you like to see it?"
 
Angela smiled a bit thinking of the fond memories they had there. The passion the walls held and the places it lead them, “Thank you. My partner will be glad to know we have a more private place to practice. I have an interview you know for a local play house and he is to be my partner. HE is also trying out.”

Angela took his hand a second giving it a squeeze before standing, “Well the driver is waiting I had better go. Feel free to call on me any time Tom. I would gladly come.
 
"Stay right now" he said. "I can send Harold for your things. Let me go and pay the driver and send him on his way. I was rather hoping we could have a dance." He said rather dissapointed that she was still with her partner, especialy since he wasn't gay as she had thought.

"Would you do that for me? It would mean alot to me. Dancing with you was one of the happiest times of my life. If we are starting over, why not start with something good?" He looked at her hopefully.
 
“I don’t think us dancing together is a good idea Tom. That lead us to a lot more that I don’t think we were ready for which lead us to our untimely end. I will not repeat that. The only man I dance with now is the one assigned to me from school. If you want me to live here I suppose I can but we will see how this all goes.” She said her voice not giving any hint of being upset but just rather matter of fact.

The truth was she could not go back to letting him touch her like that if they were to start over from scratch.
 
Tom was dissapointed, and had a hard time hiding it. Suddenly it didnt seem to him that she was keeping her word to make no mention of the past. True enough she wasn't negative, but clearly she was letting the past effect her choices. "not even a waltz?" he asked. I know we said start over, but that hardly seems like a problem to me. If we can't touch at all forming a relationship is going to be difficult." He wanted to know if her current dance partner had been the one who took her virginity, but refrained from asking.
 
“Accept it or leave it Tom. The ball is in your court. “ She stood walking towards the door. He had been pushy before and she was not going to tolerate that from him now. Angela was clearly not going to dance with him nor anything else perhaps his desire for it was his way of not letting go of the past and she was simply starting the relationship from point blank. Her word was that there would be no promises so she had in fact stuck to just that. The thick boots clunked as she walked out to the driver getting ready to get into the exquisite black car, “Should you want this I will be expecting you to pick me up at 8 dressed to go to dinner with my friends and I as we are opening at the opera house tomorrow. It is a black tie affair.” She slid onto the seat and when she had arrived home began the process of letting her beauty team prepare her for the night.
 
Tom walked out to the car to see her off." I'm really sorry you feel that way" he said. "As for dinner, I think I'll respectfully decline. I'm accustomed to being invited not ordered to appear. My offer to move in is still open to you should you wish to accept it. Perhaps we can still go out to dinner sometime when its not a command performance. I told you before that I have missed you terribly. That's still true, but the person I missed, didn't treat me that way. I would have been happy to come to dinner had you simply asked me to." There was not even a hint of anger or sarchasm in his voice, but rather sadness. He turned and quietly walked slowly back to the house.

His heart had been on a roller coaster that day, and he was tired. He took no pleasure at all in what had just happened. He headed back towards his study, wondering if his life would ever be normal again.
 
Apologizing to the driver she stepped out of the car and went back to the house being shown to his study, “I’m sorry Tom. A year has changed me and I am no longer that little girl you loved just like you are a shell of the man I loved. Perhaps we are over then but I could not leave things the way I did. Goodbye Tom.” She fished the tickets from her pockets and presented them to him. Two tickets to her performance the following night, “You are welcome with a guest to come as a family friend.”

She could not go back to the scared little girl he had once pushed around. She would not ask him because he would have taken his lumps this once and showed his ability to be humble had he truly loved her or grasped what he had done. She gave a sigh leaving then and going to the car and having it drive her away. The man had no humility or he would have accepted her demand just once but she clearly knew you could not teach an old dog new tricks. New beginning or not he had made several demands of her in the past and she could have moved on had he given in to hers this once.

She loved him but she resigned herself that it was over.
 
Tom hadn't even been allowed to speak. Angie had come in his study, made her speach, layed the tickets on the table and left. Tom looked at the tickets, and thought about what had happened and what he ought to do. Had she allowed it, he would have gone with her, but she had left without saying a word. She had her mind made up about him as she had before. He had wanted the oportunity to accept her gesture and go but it was never offered. Everything in his being told him it was a mistake, but he pulled his cell phone from his pocket and dialed her number.

When she answered, he said "Please don't hang up on me. When you came in my study a few minutes ago, You didn't give me a chance to say a word. If you had I would have told you that since you took the trouble to explain things, I would attend with you this evening. I have no idea if you would have accepted my offer, because I didn't get the chance to make it. I know you are not who you were and neither am I, that's why we had decided to start over. Starting over means starting over. I don't expect you to trust me, but neither can you expect me to know you, or who you are. I am willing to learn to love you again, if you are willing to do the same for me. You don't know me either. We both deserve the benefit of the doubt. Without it we are doomed to fail. If you are willing to have me come, I will attend your dinner with your friends tonight. If not I fear we are as you said "over"." With that he said no more but listened to what she had to say.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom