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Boredom of sorts.

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Exactly how i feel, Arc. My ex fiance left me for my best friend because i was 'unrealisticly romantic', which translated to her eyes, as fake. i waited 2 months to make love to her, which she found odd. My ex girlfriend left me for her first boyfriend, a man that treated her like shit when she was 13, pressured her into having sex, and broke up with her cause she wouldn't. he left her with self esteem issues which i worked to repair. i tried to make her feel beautiful and wanted. she went back to the...
 
asshole. it breaks my heart to see wonderful ladies with ogres and bastards. i hope to find someone someday with an appreciation for romance and real love. i'm rough around the edges due to my disdain for 'normal people.'

Kyo- aaaw. -Blush.- thank you very much ^^
 
:( I'm sorry to hear that.I hate men like that,not only do they completely treat women like shit,but they distort if not completely destroy their view of love and the hopes of ever finding it.

You're welcome.^^ Men who are like that are worthless bags of trash,and you're a wonderful guy for not pressuring them,and trying to help them through those problems.
 
The wounded woman. Been there. One I knew was the daughter of a real bastard and his, I kid you not, abused mail order wife. Worked hard on trying to help her see a new way into the world. Last I heard though she ran off to live with some drug addict that beat the shit out of her constantly.

Still bothers me. I wasn't even romantically interested in her, in all actuality, but to see a decent friend go into such a life when she could have done much better... alas. I regret not being able to help her.
 
Arc, it's not your fault. holding those regrets will merely ruin your own self image. one of my best friends hung himself in a park. he got me into singing, and we were in a band. i blamed myself for not helping him, but, like with your friend, you cannot stop people from doing what they'll do.

Kyo-thank you very much. you're very sweet. ^^
 
I'm sorry about your friend.You're right though,you can't stop people from doing what they do.

You're welcome and thanks.
 
Intellectually I'm aware that I cannot keep these regrets, and I should not have them. At least not in any way other than a "I regret that I no longer have their presence". Emotionally though is a different game altogether. It's like my sister. I have a lot of regret there. Most people tell me I shouldn't, that I never should have had to be in that position, no way anyone could expect me to handle it, etc, etc, etc. But I still realize that I handled it badly, the more I tried, the worse it seemed to go, turned out probably as bad as it could, and I ruined her life. One of those things were I sometimes think of it and lay awake at night, wondering just what sort of damnations await me for it.
 
The only damnations that await you are those you create for yourself. if you believe in god, he can't be cruel enough to punish you for someone else's actions. if, like me, you do not believe, then the only hell that awaits you is the one you make for yourself. you have to make this time you have here the best you can. we have but one life to live. it doesn't last. i have taken wrong turn after wrong turn, tried to bleed my sin and life away with knife and razor. in the end... you have to just finda way...
 
to live. To let go of the past. i may only be 22 but i've seen and been through more than i care to live. things haunt me, i have struggles with self loathing, but if i didn't have any hope, i'd destroy myself.

Kyo, anything else you wanna know?
 
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