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Notice Rule #4 adjustment (Minimum age of characters in adult situations).

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tsukasa said:
I can't wait for the staff to ban rape next, because that's also illegal, then murder, then furry. If they're banning this, they had better ban the rest, too. This is completely about control, kink-shaming, and censorship. Staff can say otherwise as much as they want, but that's the fact. There are other things allowed on this site which are "illegal" just as much as this (despite this not actually being illegal in writing; just ask that other roleplaying site I mentioned, earlier, which had FBI scrutinise it and give it the all-clear).

This is simply because staff don't like it, so they want to ban it for everyone. "Simple as", as one of the staff members said to me at some point; back at you.

Yes, it's a private site, but it's meaningless without people who enjoy it. Don't forget, we don't have to stay here. I've already seen people on the other site I already mentioned, solely due to this censorship which is fully BMR's self-inflicted fault.

If you want to ban this for being illegal (again, it's not), then you had better hope you ban the rest of the "illegal" kinks, too, hypocrites.
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They didn't ban anything, though. They just literally increased the age by ONE YEAR. Yall are getting too fired up about playing HIGH-SCHOOLERS on an ADULT site.

bruh 💀
 
Krasnaya said:
They didn't ban anything, though. They just literally increased the age by ONE YEAR. Yall are getting too fired up about playing HIGH-SCHOOLERS on an ADULT site.

bruh 💀
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I am SO CONFUSED why it's worth people losing their minds over a one year age difference 😭 like you can even make your character freshly 16 if you want and nothing would essentially change.
 
Saber said:
If we were to ban it for everyone, then staff just would've raised the minimum age to 18+. BMR is one of the very few sites that I'm aware of, that allows RP with characters under 18. The talk of banning something is a little off point since you're just stating what you believe to be the truth, which is your right. Unfortunately you are wrong. As originally stated, the age will not be raised past 16, believe it or not, again, that's your right, but continuing to spread the rumors of banning rape, murder, etc. is just members being salty about the change.
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What if I want to play as a 15-year-old? What if everyone else does? Sorry, you're the one who's wrong, trying to cover it up like another staff member already tried to when they deleted my threads (2 of them on the matter).

If you're not banning 15-year-old characters in adult situations, what are you banning? Because that's the title, unless I'm blind...
 
TheNymphet said:
I am SO CONFUSED why it's worth people losing their minds over a one year age difference 😭 like you can even make your character freshly 16 if you want and nothing would essentially change.
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Literally though. The admins are being incredibly generous.
 
Michael-Jackson-Popcorn-GIF-Meme-Eating-Popcorn-Featured-StudioBinder.jpg


Don't mind me...
 
tsukasa said:
What if I want to play as a 15-year-old? What if everyone else does? Sorry, you're the one who's wrong, trying to cover it up like another staff member already tried to when they deleted my threads (2 of them on the matter).

If you're not banning 15-year-old characters in adult situations, what are you banning? Because that's the title, unless I'm blind...
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Revelations said:
We believe there should be a space for this kind of RP and BMR is a place where people can do that safely, under an administration that does not suffer predators lightly.
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Rising Of The Moon said:
They are under absolutely no obligation to take that risk, no matter how small. They bear the costs of this website and keep it running.
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As a newbie, I've found this discussion in its entirety fascinating. But throughout the entire thread, I've been thinking this exact thing in my head.

It must have been an exhausting experience discussing and debating this as Staff. I'm beyond impressed that they've opened this space up too in order for members to air their grievances. However, I'm shocked at the level of entitlement I'm seeing. The owner of this domain and the staff who work behind the scenes should never be expected to absorb any risk involved with content of this type. If you want to take on and wage a battle against "censorship" or risk financial or social hardship, then put your own money where your own mouth is. Go forth and do it yourself.
 
Just make your own site, your own rules. It must be a hard concept to realize that just because something is legal doesn't mean it has to be allowed on a privately run site.

Basically, their house their rules. If you don't like it you can leave and contiue to cry about how it is so authoritarian and all this other stuff that makes you believe you sound big and smart.

But it doesn't.

If Staff or Veks specifically made a rule that says you can't write in first person on this site because they feel like that is sexting more than make believe rp. Then they have every right to make a rule like that regardless of how you feel or laws be damned.

Run your own site how you want.
 
tsukasa said:
What if I want to play as a 15-year-old? What if everyone else does? Sorry, you're the one who's wrong, trying to cover it up like another staff member already tried to when they deleted my threads (2 of them on the matter).

If you're not banning 15-year-old characters in adult situations, what are you banning? Because that's the title, unless I'm blind...
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If you want to play a 15 year old character you are free to do so off of, and out of affiliation of the site. There is nothing to cover up so I'm not sure why you're so upset, other than that you can't play 15 year old characters. Which is fine, you are completely free to be upset about that. Please, enlighten me on what staff is trying to cover up? You are very focused on the negative instead of focusing on the fact that BMR is still allowing underage characters in RPs.
 
TearsofLys said:
As a newbie, I've found this discussion in its entirety fascinating. But throughout the entire thread, I've been thinking this exact thing in my head.

It must have been an exhausting experience discussing and debating this as Staff. I'm beyond impressed that they've opened this space up too in order for members to air their grievances. However, I'm shocked at the level of entitlement I'm seeing. The owner of this domain and the staff who work behind the scenes should never be expected to absorb any risk involved with content of this type. If you want to take on and wage a battle against "censorship" or risk financial or social hardship, then put your own money where your own mouth is. Go forth and do it yourself.
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Right? The staff doesn't have to allow underage RP at all. Period. It's not a civil right to be able to RP a 15 yo in a sexual situation on this site 💀. And it isn't a new infringement on creativity. By that logic any and all rules on this site are an infringement on creative freedom. So like... People really need to calm down.
 
TheNymphet said:
Right? The staff doesn't have to allow underage RP at all. Period. It's not a civil right to be able to RP a 15 yo in a sexual situation on this site 💀. And it isn't a new infringement on creativity. By that logic any and all rules on this site are an infringement on creative freedom. So like... People really need to calm down.
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I'm completely baffled by this hyperfixation.
 
tsukasa said:
trying to cover it up like another staff member already tried to when they deleted my threads (2 of them on the matter).
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The only threads that staff removed were requests for your supporter status to be removed, which we remove as we complete them so the entire forum isn't cluttered by "please withdraw my account" requests. We do this with everyone who posts in Q&S asking for a supporter status change/withdraw request/etc. so that legit questions and suggestions can be seen and answered.

I hope this helps to clarify.
 
Ngl, using the terms 'authoritarian' and 'censorship' on a privately owned site is fucking hilarious and a pretty hard self-tell :ROFLMAO:
 
Saber said:
If you want to play a 15 year old character you are free to do so off of, and out of affiliation of the site. There is nothing to cover up so I'm not sure why you're so upset, other than that you can't play 15 year old characters. Which is fine, you are completely free to be upset about that. Please, enlighten me on what staff is trying to cover up? You are very focused on the negative instead of focusing on the fact that BMR is still allowing underage character in RPs.
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I'm "negative" because you are blatantly, and publicly, lying about what you are saying. As a staff member, isn't that quite a bit less professional than you're supposed to be? Claiming that you're not banning things just because you want to, yet here you are doing exactly that.

And this isn't even about the age or underage characters, specifically, it's about the precedence it sets, with you doing whatever you please at any time, without prior consultation of the community (yes, it's a private site, which is fine and not the point; I'll clear that up now before continuing so people don't derail what I'm saying here), then saying you're not just banning things. Banning specifically-aged characters which other people want to RP as, maybe even for therapy or such, even going against what the owner/lead admin of this site said about being able to talk about rape (more hypocrisy) is quite literally the definition of banning something.

I can't believe you actually had the nerve to say you aren't banning anything when that's literally what this rule change is doing.
 
tsukasa said:
I'm "negative" because you are blatantly, and publicly, lying about what you are saying. As a staff member, isn't that quite a bit less professional than you're supposed to be? Claiming that you're not banning things just because you want to, yet here you are doing exactly that.

And this isn't even about the age or underage characters, specifically, it's about the precedence it sets, with you doing whatever you please at any time, without prior consultation of the community (yes, it's a private site, which is fine and not the point; I'll clear that up now before continuing so people don't derail what I'm saying here), then saying you're not just banning things. Banning specifically-aged characters which other people want to RP as, maybe even for therapy or such, even going against what the owner/lead admin of this site said about being able to talk about rape (more hypocrisy) is quite literally the definition of banning something.

I can't believe you actually had the nerve to say you aren't banning anything when that's literally what this rule change is doing.
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Staff understands that people will write underage for therapeutic purposes, hence why the minimum age wasn't raised to 18. You being hyperfocused on 15 year old characters is what seems to be the issue. 15 year old characters are still allowed in RP, just not in sexual situations.
 
While I realize not everyone is going to agree with tsukasa, please try not to antagonize them or anyone else that disagrees with this decision. While it can be infuriating, they all have a right to air their grievance and be treated civilly. Again, staff would prefer this thread stays unlocked and the inflammatory or unnecessary comments will result in the opposite.
 
Saber said:
You being hyperfocused on 15 year old characters is what seems to be the issue. 15 year old characters are still allowed in RP, just not in sexual situations.
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This is what I was referring to earlier. 15 and 16 aren't even that different. Just that 16 year olds are legally considered as individuals who are able to consent.
 
They said they weren't banning underage Rp, which they aren't. They are banning one specific year of age.

I haven't been around long enough to witness the other adjustments of minimum age so I don't know how they went down.
I am also generally of the opinion that any fiction written between and only accessible by consenting adults should not be beholden to any laws, as it is fiction.

That being said, I definitely have my own personal lines of what I accept and what not, what I find disgusting and what not, and I wouldn't be part of a community that pushes to far across these lines. Just because I think something written in fiction shouldn't be punishable by law doesn't mean I want anything to do with it.

And again, we don't know why Staff made this decision. There are reasons between "because we want it so" (which is already perfectly valid, no matter how much anyone might personally disagree) and "We have to because of the law".

Perhaps if staff shared why, it might cool some minds. Then again, perhaps not. I've never been a mod, and have no experience with such things.

But generally, I think some people take this harder than it has to be. We didn't go from "No limits at all" to "only heterosexual missionary on this Christian Minecraft server".
 
Rising Of The Moon said:
Perhaps if staff shared why, it might cool some minds. Then again, perhaps not. I've never been a mod, and have not experience with such things.
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It's extremely difficult at times, because no matter what you do, no matter how much you try to accommodate as many people as possible, but also setting up necessary boundaries, you're gonna get backlash no matter what. The bigger the group/site, the more pressure it is. I say the mods are doing a great job and I doubt they'd want to put themselves and others through any unnecessary grievances just because "they wanted to change the rules/ban stuff".
 
Seems to me that ultimately the staff is being quite reasonable. While I empathize that it's inconvenient for writers to retcon or lose the ability to write about a specific story using the age of 15, I think that the frustration that the change makes is valid in that it's a valid emotional response to something that isn't wanted by the individual. I don't think anyone is suggesting being frustrated or disappointed is wrong, howver the way people are conducting thier emotions in a volatile, antagonistic, or hyperbolic manner is losing site of what has actually changed. As far as this specific change is a sign of future changes, well I can understand that train of thought, however, the truth is that it's speculative and not based on evidence or proof but a kind of fear-based response. From my perspective, this change isn't some kind of draconic abuse of power, the staff have every right to any rule change they want to make. That said I really do understand how this could be frustrating, let's just try not to let that frustration become hostile.
 
Rising Of The Moon said:
Perhaps if staff shared why, it might cool some minds. Then again, perhaps not. I've never been a mod, and have not experience with such things.
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Changing it to 16 does a few things

1 - it makes our telegraphing checks easier to explain and enforce
2 - it normalizes the site rules with Elliquiy
3 - it matches common 'age of consent' laws which make people more comfortable

The main thing is I have seen people using 15 year olds to telegraph pedophilia and we do need to put the drop on that.
 
The real issue tsukasa seems to have is that this sets a 'precedent' for staff to change rules on a whim.

It's not like this is the first time rules have changed, you know? If rules being changed is a problem, then maybe this is just not the place for you. People have already raised the opinion that it's annoying to retcon and change roleplays, but oh well, what'll you do?

It's not "authoritarian", or "draconian" or any other similar word used to describe over-reaching control over others. I also don't believe in the notion that it's a slippery slope. It just isn't.
 
Saber said:
Staff understands that people will write underage for therapeutic purposes, hence why the minimum age wasn't raised to 18. You being hyperfocused on 15 year old characters is what seems to be the issue. 15 year old characters are still allowed in RP, just not in sexual situations.
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So just to confirm. I have a short story where the characters are 15 and there's some crazy stuff happening in the town they live in. But none of them are in sexual situation. That is okay?

This sounds fair to me.
 
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