Your support makes Blue Moon possible (Patreon)((I wrote this originally in German, so it may have lost some of the feeling in the translation to English, but I think it gets the point across. And yes it is a style choice to be choppy and broken as it is, not me being inept at writing.))
He shoots. He kills. He heals. He learns.
He drinks. He sleeps. He yells. He hits.
He fixes. He smokes. He disapproves. He teaches.
Three men. One mother. One child. No father.
His father was in the Army. His father drank. His father was in Korea when he was born. Crying baby without a dad. No father.
He barely knew his real father. His mother left with him when he was six months old. They left everything. No father.
They went to live with his grandmother and grandfather. His mother went to school. He was raised by his grandmother. No father.
He loved his grandmother, and she loved him. Together he quickly learned to read and write. His mother found a new boyfriend. No father.
His mother and her boyfriend married. He didn't like the man, but he was silent. Kindergarten, they moved into a new house. No father.
He was a genius. School was easy for him. He learned and was adept at everything. He was made fun of for being bad at sports. No father.
Teasing became part of his life. He was friends with everyone. He was innocent. He was walked over. Everyone walked over him. No father.
He felt a surgery. Pain was terrifying. Anything that caused him pain was terrifying. He became controlled by his fear. No father.
His stepfather drank, he yelled, he hit, he slept, he worked. He was lots of things, but not a father. He was a terror. No father.
The boy grew up hearing fights every night. Fights no child should hear. Fights nobody should hear. His mother cried. No father.
Two new children entered the family. He was nothing like his new stepfather. He was scared of his new stepfather. No father.
He wanted to be indoors, safe from potential harm. His stepfather forced him to go outside, forced him to hate the outside. No father.
He cried. His mother was being hurt. His mother loved him. He loved her. Her tears at night changed him. No father.
His stepfather left. She was happy and safe. He was happy and safe. They were all happy and safe. No father.
Middle school. The teasing grew by the day. He was scrawny. He was weak. He was afraid. He had no one to teach him how to be a man. No father.
His mother found a new boyfriend. Her boyfriend was a kind man, and had a son. Her boyfriend smoked. No father.
They got married. His new stepfather was different. They did not agree on anything. They had nothing in common. No father.
He grew up on a farm. He had a different work ethic than the boy was used to. They did nothing together. He obviously liked his brother more. No father.
High school. Four years of torture, he quietly suffered through it all. Teasing, hatred, loss of friends. He felt it all. No father.
He was an actor. He was a band member. He was a choir member. He was brilliant. He was talented. He was a friend. He was a boyfriend. No father.
He was confident. He was cocky. He had a huge ego. He was a great friend. He cared. He loved everything. He was happy. He was lying.
Every teacher loved him. But he grew depressed. He wasn't happy unless he was on the stage. Escapism became his best friend. No father.
A girl entered his life. She needed him. Her father had Leukemia and was a shell of his former self. He needed her. They both had, no father.
She understood him. She touched him. She grew with him. He loved her. She loved him. Together they had big plans. Together they were one. No father.
New brother. Happy mother. Stressed mother. She had three jobs to keep the roof over their head. No father.
He grew depressed. He hated everything. He depended on her. She depended on him. It terrified him. No father.
He couldn't be her father. He didn't know what it was to be a father. He was replacing her father. It scared him. Terrified him. No father.
Escapism and corporal pleasures became everything. Sex and games were his life. School became nothing to him. Once it was important. Now... No longer.
He graduated. He had no job. He left her. He cried. She cried. He crushed a girls heart just like his stepdad had. He was a man. No father.
He didn't want to be a man. He made a woman cry. He MADE a woman cry. HE MADE A WOMAN CRY. He pulled further away from life. No father.
He got in fights with his stepdad. He talked to his real dad. He visited his second dad. He hated everything, everyone. No father.
He left to college. He had friends, but inside, he was alone. He was different. He had no father. He wanted a father. No father.
He was hurt. How had someone, who had been so strong for so long finally, finally gotten hurt. The pain was confining. More escapism. No father.
The only way he could be himself, was online. He became his avatar. He was more invested in the virtual world than the real world. No father.
He went through his real life, a hollow shell, the only things he cared about were online. The only people he cared about were online. No father.
Everyone teased him, both online and in real life. But, he was used to it. Suffering was his life. He stoicly accepted all pain. No father.
Finally, he ripped himself free. His friends who were slipping away, returned. Yet, he was not whole. A shell of humanity. An actor playing a man.
He never had the chance to know his first father. He was scared of his second father. He didn't get along with his third father. No father.
No father. No father to raise him. No father to teach him. No father he loved. That caused him problems. He put on a mask of happiness, pride, and humor. A mask that is slowly falling away, showing his real and hidden self. People start to wonder why this boy is emotional. They wonder why he acts like a girl. They wonder why he prefers the company of women. They ask if he's gay. They think he's gay. He's not gay. He likes women, no, he worships women. He would do anything to prevent a girl from crying. He loved his mother. Her tears changed him. Yelling, fighting, confrontation, he hates it all. He would suffer in silence, rather than cause even the slightest ripple. People walk on him. People treat him like shit. He's a person. A person without a father. He's an actor. An actor hiding behind his mask. His mask is slowly falling away. People don't understand him. People can't understand him. They have fathers. He doesn't.
He shoots. He kills. He heals. He learns.
He drinks. He sleeps. He yells. He hits.
He fixes. He smokes. He disapproves. He teaches.
Three men. One mother. One child. No father.
His father was in the Army. His father drank. His father was in Korea when he was born. Crying baby without a dad. No father.
He barely knew his real father. His mother left with him when he was six months old. They left everything. No father.
They went to live with his grandmother and grandfather. His mother went to school. He was raised by his grandmother. No father.
He loved his grandmother, and she loved him. Together he quickly learned to read and write. His mother found a new boyfriend. No father.
His mother and her boyfriend married. He didn't like the man, but he was silent. Kindergarten, they moved into a new house. No father.
He was a genius. School was easy for him. He learned and was adept at everything. He was made fun of for being bad at sports. No father.
Teasing became part of his life. He was friends with everyone. He was innocent. He was walked over. Everyone walked over him. No father.
He felt a surgery. Pain was terrifying. Anything that caused him pain was terrifying. He became controlled by his fear. No father.
His stepfather drank, he yelled, he hit, he slept, he worked. He was lots of things, but not a father. He was a terror. No father.
The boy grew up hearing fights every night. Fights no child should hear. Fights nobody should hear. His mother cried. No father.
Two new children entered the family. He was nothing like his new stepfather. He was scared of his new stepfather. No father.
He wanted to be indoors, safe from potential harm. His stepfather forced him to go outside, forced him to hate the outside. No father.
He cried. His mother was being hurt. His mother loved him. He loved her. Her tears at night changed him. No father.
His stepfather left. She was happy and safe. He was happy and safe. They were all happy and safe. No father.
Middle school. The teasing grew by the day. He was scrawny. He was weak. He was afraid. He had no one to teach him how to be a man. No father.
His mother found a new boyfriend. Her boyfriend was a kind man, and had a son. Her boyfriend smoked. No father.
They got married. His new stepfather was different. They did not agree on anything. They had nothing in common. No father.
He grew up on a farm. He had a different work ethic than the boy was used to. They did nothing together. He obviously liked his brother more. No father.
High school. Four years of torture, he quietly suffered through it all. Teasing, hatred, loss of friends. He felt it all. No father.
He was an actor. He was a band member. He was a choir member. He was brilliant. He was talented. He was a friend. He was a boyfriend. No father.
He was confident. He was cocky. He had a huge ego. He was a great friend. He cared. He loved everything. He was happy. He was lying.
Every teacher loved him. But he grew depressed. He wasn't happy unless he was on the stage. Escapism became his best friend. No father.
A girl entered his life. She needed him. Her father had Leukemia and was a shell of his former self. He needed her. They both had, no father.
She understood him. She touched him. She grew with him. He loved her. She loved him. Together they had big plans. Together they were one. No father.
New brother. Happy mother. Stressed mother. She had three jobs to keep the roof over their head. No father.
He grew depressed. He hated everything. He depended on her. She depended on him. It terrified him. No father.
He couldn't be her father. He didn't know what it was to be a father. He was replacing her father. It scared him. Terrified him. No father.
Escapism and corporal pleasures became everything. Sex and games were his life. School became nothing to him. Once it was important. Now... No longer.
He graduated. He had no job. He left her. He cried. She cried. He crushed a girls heart just like his stepdad had. He was a man. No father.
He didn't want to be a man. He made a woman cry. He MADE a woman cry. HE MADE A WOMAN CRY. He pulled further away from life. No father.
He got in fights with his stepdad. He talked to his real dad. He visited his second dad. He hated everything, everyone. No father.
He left to college. He had friends, but inside, he was alone. He was different. He had no father. He wanted a father. No father.
He was hurt. How had someone, who had been so strong for so long finally, finally gotten hurt. The pain was confining. More escapism. No father.
The only way he could be himself, was online. He became his avatar. He was more invested in the virtual world than the real world. No father.
He went through his real life, a hollow shell, the only things he cared about were online. The only people he cared about were online. No father.
Everyone teased him, both online and in real life. But, he was used to it. Suffering was his life. He stoicly accepted all pain. No father.
Finally, he ripped himself free. His friends who were slipping away, returned. Yet, he was not whole. A shell of humanity. An actor playing a man.
He never had the chance to know his first father. He was scared of his second father. He didn't get along with his third father. No father.
No father. No father to raise him. No father to teach him. No father he loved. That caused him problems. He put on a mask of happiness, pride, and humor. A mask that is slowly falling away, showing his real and hidden self. People start to wonder why this boy is emotional. They wonder why he acts like a girl. They wonder why he prefers the company of women. They ask if he's gay. They think he's gay. He's not gay. He likes women, no, he worships women. He would do anything to prevent a girl from crying. He loved his mother. Her tears changed him. Yelling, fighting, confrontation, he hates it all. He would suffer in silence, rather than cause even the slightest ripple. People walk on him. People treat him like shit. He's a person. A person without a father. He's an actor. An actor hiding behind his mask. His mask is slowly falling away. People don't understand him. People can't understand him. They have fathers. He doesn't.