🌿🍄𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐨𝐦 & 𝐦𝐨𝐬𝐬🍄🌿 [ comments welcome | NSFW ]

[baeleaf]

「 ⋅. 𖥸 .⋅ 」
​

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I've never really written in a journal before, I'm not very good at them, but I like the aesthetic-- so I figure why not give it another go! Honestly this first part is just going to be me posting this to get it up and going, and hope that I can maintain this going forward. ​

Ideally I'd like to include a posting schedule for when I get back into roleplay fully, habit tracker, and a general dump of feelings. ​

I totally understand if no one wants to read this, I mean who wants to see me get excited over how much water I've drank in a day, but those who do want to follow along, feel free! I'd be happy to have you for the journey, as long as it may be. Feel free to comment as well, I would love to chit-chat with any & all! ​

So welcome all, and thanks for coming to my TEDtalk journal of many things. ​

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[baeleaf]

「 ⋅. 𖥸 .⋅ 」
𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐲
​

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this is the current color list I have to match (as best I can) to my current icon. ​

#d49a26 -- golden hour​

#2d6e40 -- spring fern ​

#707c46 -- mossy stump​

#823d59 -- crushed grape​

#5c342a -- fallen logs​

#f0d093 -- faded buttercup ​

#b4560e -- monarchs wing​

#cb9361 -- sunbeam​

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[baeleaf]

𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐟𝐭𝐡, 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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Twelfth is such a weird word to write? omg??

Any whosit-- I've been feeling really down & depressed again the last day or so and
today was such a rollercoaster.

Zelda came out and my fiancé and I had already budgeted for the game & amiibo,
so going into the day wasn't a huge deal. Walmart had the pro controller so that
was good and fine bUT THEN we go to gamestop to pick up the game and they
had an extra copy of the collectors edition. So I mean of course we had to get it
but it was a decent chunk more than we were ready to spend, and then there
were y'know accessories and stuff-- not to mention we got the OLED switch a
few weeks back. I'm happy we have the game but my god was it an expensive day.

All in all it ended in a nicer atmosphere though; fire pit and s'mores, and that's a
mood booster for sure.

Also I'm kinda bummed because I just realized some of my icons & emoticons in
this thread only show up as funky symbols here, damn! I digress,

Have a great evening, all! ​

​

 

[baeleaf]

𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐝 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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My head has been pounding since last and it's just now finally subsiding but
this morning I woke up to a message from one of my oldest friends and
co-writers / roleplayers that she was quitting roleplay completely. While she
and I haven't been actively doing anything for a while it's still a bit of a blow
to come to terms with. I'm happy for her, she seems much happier-- like a
weight off her shoulders when she told me-- so I support her in her decision.
She told me she was closing the book completely and I told her to look at it
instead like flipping a book on it's pages; easy to turn back around if you
wanted but not completely done. She's got a family, a little kiddo so I
understand where she's coming from and again I support her decision
completely, but it's like a little piece of me is kind of gone now too which does
make me pretty sad to think about.

Any-who, that's my ramblings for today.​

​

 

[baeleaf]

𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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i'm like vibrating with anxious energy today.

trying to deal with a smaller group of friends within my larger community group
and i'm torn between letting them implode on themselves and saying something
for the 60,000th time.

i'm thirty years old, majority of us are all late twenties early thirties. it should not
be this hard to keep friendships, nor do people gotta be such bitches.

tldr i fucking hate people sometimes. ​

 

[baeleaf]

𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐢𝐟𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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i am overwhelmed.
​

​

 

[baeleaf]

𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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[Siph]

𝐦𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

That's a good journal entry. I like that.

 

[baeleaf]

That's a good journal entry. I like that.

thank you!! i'm glad you liked it! i'll be posting more aesthetics like this in the future too~​

 

[baeleaf]

𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐝 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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here are some samples for everyone's perusal!​

they vary in range depending on the scene, an intro or standard post,​

drabbles, etc.​

s a m p l e 1 | s a m p l e two | s a m p l e three | s a m p l e four | s a m p l e five |

• introduction post - 615 words
  𝕮aptain Hook was the most fearsome pirate in all of Neverland, leading his men with a mixture of fear and admiration, across tumultuous sea in search of his adversary Peter Pan and his Lost Boys. The duo had waged war against one another since time immemorial, all of Neverland's inhabitants were aware and while some never spoke it aloud every manner of creature and lifeform in Neverland had picked a side. Majority favored Peter Pan, all boyish charm and mischief, while Captain Hook had barely naught but his crew and a few mermaids or sirens who understood the wrath of the pirate. Naia was among the few who preferred to keep their own company, drifting in the sea with the currents that carried them in all manner of directions. Often times their paths crossed with both the pirates and the Lost Boys, and even the Fae or Indians on rare occasions. The traded shiny baubles and trinkets for newer shiny things to keep them interested, many venturing far beyond the horizons of Neverland to find what else their waters held. More often than not her interactions with the pirates were less than pleasant and it had in turn soured her idea of them.
  
  Her sense of adventure and desire for thrills led her to much more trouble than she had bargained for, after finding herself struck into a deal which rendered her mute-- though not without a silver lining. The brunette mermaid had often dreamt aloud her dreams of walking Neverland's shores or being swept up in a throng of people in a distant land to explore what her tail couldn't give her. The, for lack of better word, sea witch who she had crossed with struck the deal and Naia had to find her way among humans with no ability to speak.
  
  That had proven awfully difficult when she woke up, on board a strange ship with little memory of how she had gotten from the witch's cove to the ship in question and no way to explain herself. The crew and captain the ship belonged to she later found was to be the notorious pirate himself, Captain Hook, and even though he could have easily killed her or sent her on her way she was... accepted onto the Jolly Roger amongst the interesting collection of men who also inhabited the vessel. Her time there had not been easy-- the ship was often racked by storms in the evening, attacks from Pan during the day, prone to freezing when Pan left Neverland and the magic was swept up with him. Not to mention the pirate captain himself, whom she admitted she had a fondness for but only to a degree given her distaste for Hook's antics against children. Nevertheless her presence was somewhat accepted and growing more usual by the day; Smee even having been so kind to gift her a stack of paper, albeit slightly waterlogged, and a short, waxy feather and ink so she could better communicate with them.
  
  That morning in particular was nothing strange, Pan had returned at some point in the night and the waters had thawed from their frozen state but the young boy seemed to be in a mood. Inexplicably entwined, Pan's emotions immediately effected Neverland and they were set about by another outrageous storm. Winds knocked at the masts and sails, sending anything not tied down flying about only to be lost at sea or taken to shore by the heavy winds. Many flocked to below deck or any safe haven they could find aboard the Jolly Roger, Naia included, who kept herself tucked away in the captain's personal quarters, where she was often sequestered to.
• standard post - 508 words
  “What the fuck.” The force at which she hurdled forward was brought to an abrupt halt by the large muscular arm clothes pinning her from exiting the vehicle through the truck's windshield. It gave her whiplash, neck muscles aching and head was already starting to drum with pain. Henley was forced to look in his direction by the weight and grip of his fingers, green eyes narrowed at him but ultimately subject to listen to his words. It made sense and when he put it that way it made even more sense to the point she couldn’t even argue against it because it’s literally what she did. And that made her so angry because she knew he was right and she didn’t want him to be. She wanted her freedom.
  
  The rumbling of the vehicle was loud but not as loud as the silence that filled the space between them for a few heartbeats after he made his case. The brunette turned her attention away from him and back to surveying the scenery around them; the dust cloud kicked up by his band of thugs driving off and leaving them in the middle of the desert wastes. There was nothing for miles, she knew that well enough, surely she’d die if he ditched her now, if no one, or no creature, found her first. She’d been getting around well enough for the last year or so but her luck had just run out. Her boot connected with the dashboard, kicking it to expel some of the anger she had been holding in. Nearly curling into herself, Henley shut her eyes tight and a loud yell tore at her throat, screaming until her throat was raw.
  
  Work for him. Do his bidding, be the pawn in his game. The sneaking little thief to add to his collection of things. She couldn’t deny the swell of pride that flooded her chest when he commented on her ability, even if the circumstances weren’t to her liking. And she hated it. “Fine.” She sighed her life, her freedom away, because she had no choice. She had to survive. Even now, she only grit her teeth when his meaty hand encased her thigh, wanting nothing more than to curl up into a ball, already missing her bed, her space, her home. Eyes looking out the window again, she ignored him for another few moments, debating on giving him a fake name but nothing came to her immediately.
  
  “Henley.” It had been a long time since she’d told anyone her name, her full name, that she barely remembered it all. “Henley Hale.” Outside of her father and an associate or two, Henley didn’t talk to many people and tried to make it a point not to meet anyone new. She stayed secluded and ran solo, her only interactions were with information brokers and vendors who she could sell her stolen wares to. She didn’t much care for this man, this Buck fellow and she wasn’t looking forward to doing his bidding from now on.
• introduction post - 630 words
  Evelyn considered herself lucky that she was able to get into a good college, her first choice at that, on such a good scholarship right out of high school. There wasn't a need for her to take a break like many of her friends and schoolmates had, not when she already had her career laid out ahead of her. Like she'd always been told she was destined for, Evie devoted all of her time to studying and expanding her pool of knowledge in order to be successful. From a young age her parents had commented on and impressed upon her that her grades and knowledge were the only importance. AP classes in high school, extra curriculars that would impress any employer, band club, debate, tutoring-- anything that would give her any kind of edge, the brunette was enrolled in.
  
  That's how it had always been, even now in her senior year of college. With all her studying and extra side activities it left little room for her to explore any kind of personal interests-- not that she really even knew what her personal interests were. She enjoyed reading a good book, liked to binge watch some reruns of shows on her phone in what little downtime she had. Outside of that, her life was consumed with schoolwork and intent focus on having a good future. Her parents were proud, what more could she want? Friends, maybe. Her lack of a "real college experience" didn't afford many friendships outside of those in what clubs she participated in, but the few she'd gained and retained over the years tried to break her out of that thick shell time and time again.
  
  She fit easily into the stereotype of a college student who spent more time buried in books and assignments than on the world around them, as always pointed out by other stereotypical clique's; like the pretty popular girls who liked to giggle and whisper when they didn't think anyone else noticed. Or the sporty jock-types and popular, attractive men who flaunted their good looks and partied harder than her parents in the sixties had. There was one in particular who got on her nerves more than any of the others-- Benjamin. Stupid Benjamin and his stupid, handsome face-- he always, always without fail ticked her off, even now as she white-knuckled the book she was nose-deep in at the library. His snide comments and popular-boy attitude had rubbed her the wrong way one time and ever since then they had been at one another's throat when they weren't avoiding one another like the plague. She couldn't stand guys like him and for whatever reason, he seemed to have it out for her specifically. Granted, she did throw jabs at him as much as he sent them her way but, still! And now to make matters worse, she shared a class with him-- after four years of no class-interactions, they were saddled together.
  
  Even the thought of it made her fume so the brunette tried her best to read, making sure all her details were correct for the paper she was nearly ready to submit. Of course she didn't get far, not with someone loudly slamming their belongings on the table so close to her. Evelyn jumped in her seat and the book hit the table, eyes narrowed behind her glasses at the perpetrator of her sweet silence. Of course it was Benjamin, as bitter as always. Demanding her book-- ugh, his attitude was the worst, she couldn't stand it. "No, actually, I think I'll hog it indefinitely." She tried to ignore him by resuming her reading but she thought he might make that endeavor impossible. "If you wanted a good grade should have planned ahead better."
• TBA
• TBA

 

[baeleaf]

𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐞 𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞​

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my vacation can't come soon enough aaaaaaaaaaaah

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