♔ : gemini`☆´attraction ◣ feelsHASkilig && JINFINITE

[feelsHASkilig]

xx

welcome to a jinsley au got/hotd production!

witness what happens when one of jinsley is bored with nothing to do and all the muses in the world! and as a result drags the other half of this lovely duo into the mess!~ love you, love! but this is also your fault!<3

welcome to a modern retelling of our lovely targaryen twins! if you are not aware of our original got/hotd babies, please take a gander here! we promise these modern babies will be just as feels inducing as our firey prince and princess—if maybe not a little more fluffier. and if you're wondering why there seems to be so much effort in this thread compared to the original one...remember when i said that this was born from boredom and nothing to do? yeah, i was bored with nothing to do while i waited for my lovely partner to finish posts. so please enjoy my poor decisions and lack of patience and self-control that my wonderful partner is more than happy to support.

some key details to be noted: high valyrian is canon in this au. we have equated it to an accessible version of latin. it's a "living" language that can be taught in schools (although not available in ALL schools). unfortunately, dragons do not exist. le sighhhhhh. for the sake of the language, valyria still exists. the existence of other families that are mentioned in asoiaf is currently tbd. for now, all we know is that the families from old valyria exist in this world and, no, they are not closely related to one another.

lastly, shoutout to duolingo for adding high valyrian and further fueling all of my modern muses xD

valar dohaeris

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[feelsHASkilig]

* ( CURRENTLY PLAYING ) ❋x♚x❋

»;█ ( OO1 ) ❋ tab nonsense - sabrina carpenter
»;█ ( OO2 ) ❋ tab universe - thuy
»;█ ( OO3 ) ❋ tab ocean eyes - american avenue
»;█ ( OO4 ) ❋ tab bad for business - sabrina carpenter
»;█ ( OO5 ) ❋ tab melt - kehlani
»;█ ( OO6 ) ❋ tab girls like me don't cry - thuy
»;█ ( OO7 ) ❋ tab flowers - eva noblezada
»;█ ( OO8 ) ❋ tab painkiller - blackbear
»;█ ( OO9 ) ❋ tab think about you - jojo
»;█ ( O1O ) ❋ tab twin flame - machine gun kelly ​

tab tabYOU`RE TOO GOOD FOR ME tab I`M TOO BAD TO KEEP tab I WANT YOU ONLY
██ ░ VISAERA CELTIGAR ◢
╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱
tabtab tabtab I HOPE THAT WE CAN LOVE THROUGH THE PAIN AFTER THE HONEYMOON FADES ​

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ * ( THE BASICS ) ❋ x ♚ x ❋

»;█ ( NAME ) ❋ tab visaera josephine celtigar
»;█ ( NICKNAME ) ❋ tab vi (pronounced vee), sephi (dad only)
»;█ ( AGE ) ❋ tab eighteen
»;█ ( BIRTHDATE ) ❋ tab june thirteenth
»;█ ( HEIGHT ) ❋ tab five feet on a good day
»;█ ( EYE & HAIR COLOR ) ❋ tab blue tab blonde
»;█ ( SEXUALITY ) ❋ tab bisexual
»;█ ( BIRTH PLACE ) ❋ tab baltimore, maryland
»;█ ( PROFESSION ) ❋ tab very active high school student ​

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ * ( MY ATTITUDE ) ❋ x ♚ x ❋

SUPPORTIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x giving support; providing sympathy or encouragement
ENTHUSIASTIC X ▬ ❋ x ) x absorbing or controlling possession of the mind by any interest or pursuit; lively interest
RESOURCEFUL X ▬ ❋ x ) x able to deal skillfully and promptly with new situations, difficulties, etc.
PERSUASIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x able, fitted, or intended to prevail on (a person) to do something, as by advising or urging
PERCEPTIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x having or showing keenness of insight, understanding, or intuition
SENSITIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x having acute mental or emotional sensibility; aware of and responsive to the feelings of others
GUARDED X ▬ ❋ x ) x cautious; careful; prudent
DUBIOUS X ▬ ❋ x ) x wavering or hesitating in opinion; inclined to doubt
RESERVED X ▬ ❋ x ) x formal or self-restrained in manner and relationship; avoiding familiarity or intimacy with others ​

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ * ( ALL ABOUT ME ) ❋ x ♚ x ❋

»;█ ( FACT OO1 ) ❋ tab Visaera was born and raised in Baltimore, Maryland up until she was five. Her family comes from a long line of entrepreneurs with all of their wealth coming from the seafood industry. Celtigar, Inc. is the largest company in the country most known for the import and export of blue crab. Many who visit Baltimore will wait long hours and spend a lot of money for a table at House of Celtigar just to try their specialty blue crab dishes. Her family is a particularly big one. Her father is the second youngest of five children. Although it is expected that his eldest brother—the first born son—will take over the business once his father steps down and retires, he still inherited the family’s knack for business. Finishing top of the class with honors at Yale, he climbed up quickly in the business world; rising through the ranks at a near exponential rate. His expertise and overall work ethic earned him an executive position at Celtigar, Inc.’s west coast office, requiring him to move his wife and daughter to Berkeley, California.
»;█ ( FACT OO2 ) ❋ tab Before becoming a wife and mother, Visaera's mother had dreams and aspirations of being a principal ballerina. She also reached that goal, until a life altering injury prevented her from continuing with dance. So instead, she took all of her dance knowledge to NYU with the intention of becoming a dance instructor. That was where she met Visaera's father. He was in the masters program and was her TA for one of her business courses. They scandalously hit it off pretty quick. In-between classes, she was a private ballet instructor. Her students were the children of families closely associated with the Celtigars. She moved up to an instructor position in a dance academy after she and Visaera's father got married. When they all moved to California, she took a leap of faith to open her own dance studio.
»;█ ( FACT OO3 ) ❋ tab It was a bit of a shock to Visaera’s parents when they learned that the Celtigars opposed her name. After all, Visaera has Valyrian origins. But for the Celtigars, so many years detached from their home country and heavily business oriented, they thought her name too “exotic.” They worried that her “unique” name would close one too many doors; not even accounting for the fact that she is a member of the Celtigar family. But despite all the arguments, Visaera’s mother fought for her name. When Visaera was old enough to understand the politics behind her family, she was told her mother went straight to her grandfather and said, “I won’t argue against whatever wishes you may have for my daughter, except that I will have her named Visaera whether you like it or not.” Many back and forth arguments later, Visaera’s grandparents relented. To soften the blow of this defeat, her parents decided to give her a second first name that she can use for future opportunities. And since her mother chose her first first name, her father got to choose her second first name. He chose Josephine after his grandmother. For years, various family members have asked her mother why she desperately wanted to name her daughter Visaera, but for some reason, she has kept that a close lipped secret. The only response she ever gives anyone that asks is that she just thought the name was very pretty.
»;█ ( FACT OO4 ) ❋ tab Visaera is fluent in High Valyrian. Although she is Valyrian through her father's family, it was her mother—who isn't Valyrian—that insisted and encouraged her to learn and perfect it. Her father unfortunately was not part of this learning process, at least not actively. He is many generations removed from the motherland; their branch of the Celtigar family tree having emigrated long ago. He knows a few words and phrases, but is unable to hold a coherent conversation. Her mother, on the other hand, learned High Valyrian when she was in high school and while she isn't fluent, she is conversational. In fact, it can be argued that High Valyrian was Visaera's first language. Her mother spoke it to her exclusively when they were at home and she has been told that her first word was Muña—her father was a little disappointed it wasn't "Dada" or anything related, but still proud. Once she started speaking, her father hired a private language instructor to help her differentiate between High Valyrian and English. It was adorable at home, but her parents would rather she didn't mix the two languages in one sentence once she started school. At home, it isn't uncommon to find Visaera and her mother speaking exclusively in High Valyrian whenever her father isn't home.
»;█ ( FACT OO5 ) ❋ tab Visaera is very close to her parents. Not exactly that she tells them about every aspect of her life, but there is a trust between her and them that does not exist among her friends and their parents. She idolizes her mother and it can be argued that their relationship is one that surpasses just mother-daughter. Visaera is not afraid to say that her mother is one of her best friends. For as long as she can even remember, they have shared such a deep connection to one another; especially her mother. She can somehow pick up on whatever Visaera is feeling, if she needed to put in the effort to channel it. It is a running theory that this close relationship started because Visaera was born prematurely AND her mother had been struggling to conceive for years. For years, she was told how her mother stayed at her side in NICU for weeks until she was fit to leave the hospital and then took time off from running her studio to take care of her even though her in-laws recommended hiring a nanny. Her mother couldn't do it, not after struggling to have a baby for years and then almost losing the one that made it. As for her father, well, even if her mother is one of her best friends, she is without a doubt Daddy's Little Girl. He unapologetically spoiled her rotten when she was a kid, but also made sure that it didn't get too into her head growing up. She looks up to her father and is never afraid to seek out his guidance. And even though he can be very busy with work, he still finds time to spend with her whenever he gets the opportunity to get away from the office.
»;█ ( FACT OO6 ) ❋ tab Despite her close relationship with her parents, Visaera is not immune to the high expectations that come with being a Celtigar. For as long as she can remember, she has never not been busy. As soon as she was mobile, she was taken on play dates with the children from other families closely associated with hers. In fact, a lot of her friends now are those she has been with since they were babies. When she was a toddler, her parents enrolled her in various classes. Her mother, naturally, placed her in different dance classes to see if any of them would stick. She stayed in ballet and contemporary dance until middle school. She also participated in sports starting in elementary school. It wasn't competitive, but it gave her something to do after school. She enjoyed soccer for a while, but then her father took her to her first horseback riding lesson and she never looked back. She competed for years until her junior year of high school. Of all of the private lessons she took her whole life, what stuck the most until this very day was music. Like most children of her station, she started with piano. From there, once her music instructor picked up on her talent, she expanded to guitar (but this is mostly for fun) and took up singing lessons. She still competes and participates in piano recitals. But recently she has considered stepping away from recitals to focus on songwriting. It's a lowkey passion of hers, but she is not confident enough to share any songs she's attempted writing. Now, despite all of these activities keeping her occupied for nearly her entire life, what matters most to her family—meaning her extended Celtigar family—are her school activities. She has been active in her high school's Key Club since her freshman year and will be taking the VP position her senior year. Other clubs and activities she is involved in at school include: NHS, Best Buddies, and a couple other volunteer-based clubs. There are a small handful of special interest clubs that she is active in on and off depending on her schedule.
»;█ ( FACT OO7 ) ❋ tab The thing you need to know about the Celtgars is that they very much still believe in arranged marriages. Of course, with the "changing of the times" they have to be clever about it. They are a little more lenient, but that is putting it lightly. There are some occasions when it is very obvious that a marriage in the Celtigar family is arranged (i.e. when it pertains to the heir to the family business and legacy). But for the rest of the time, the family goes around the obvious definition of arranged marriages. Instead, they call it "childhood friendships." Visaera is in that category. While her parents were lucky to be a love match—it helps that her mother did come from a "good family"—Visaera was one of the many grandchildren to be strategically paired with one of the children of the various families in connection with the Celtigars. It all started when her father received his promotion to overlook the business in the west coast. The Tyrells accumulated much of their wealth from their grocery store chain all across the west coast region. They also own many acres of farmland and vineyards. And it just so happens that Visaera's father and the heir to the Tyrell family business were friends and classmates at Yale. But that is not the connection the Celtigars are invested in. It is the one between Visaera and the CEO's son, Deric. She met Deric when she was five years old, he was seven. For the most part, Visaera can't remember her life without Deric in it. Between weekly play dates until they started middle school and being enrolled in the same schools since she finished kindergarten, it was hard to look at Visaera and not think about Deric. Visaera does consider Deric a close friend. She always has fun when with him and he has helped her survive many years of school with his extra two years of knowledge. It was around her sophomore year and his senior year that they started to acknowledge that after all these years, they might actually have feelings for each other. However, it was also one of those bad timing situations. Deric was under a lot of pressure to get into Yale. While, yes, his own academic record was enough merit to get him in, it wasn't going to be enough until he received that acceptance letter. So they never tried dating. To the school, they viewed Visaera and Deric's relationship that year as "casual." It was obvious they liked each other, but school just came first. It wasn't until the summer after Deric graduated that they finally put some definition to their relationship. They both agreed that long distance wasn't going to work. Visaera was going into the toughest years of high school and Deric was starting his college career in Yale. So they continued to keep things casual, but they also made a promise to each other. Once Visaera finished high school—and hopefully also got into Yale—they would make their relationship official. For the Celtigars, that was essentially a shoe in for an engagement.
»;█ ( FACT OO8 ) ❋ tab Maybe this has everything to do with the fact that she is a Celtigar, but Visaera loves seafood. She will proudly and unapologetically eat at her family's restaurant—the closest location is in San Francisco—and sing its praises every time. She also has a constantly insatiable craving for sushi. It is one of those cravings that once someone asks her if she wants it, she will always say yes with a quickness.
»;█ ( FACT OO9 ) ❋ tab Her preferred choice of transportation is her bike, but this is mostly because she tries to stay as local as possible. If she needs to go any further than Berkeley, she will either take Bart, pay for an Uber or get a ride from someone she knows. Unfortunately, she cannot drive. This has everything to do with her height, or lack thereof to be more precise. Her inability to easily see over the wheel has been the cause of much anxiety for Visaera. So while she does possess a permit, she has yet to pluck up the courage to take the test to get her license. So for the time being, she gets around the neighborhood pretty well on her bike or she gets rides from her friends or her parents. #THATPPPLIFE
»;█ ( FACT O1O ) ❋ tab It has been engrained in her mind since she was a baby that Yale was her top long term goal. Many photo albums show Visaera surrounded by the Yale colors, whether it is a baby onesie or the blue flag that has been hanging over her bed since she was still sleeping in a crib. It's pretty obvious where this goal arose from. As his alma mater, her father dreamed for her to follow in his footsteps. Every year since she first learned how to read, they would take trips to Connecticut to visit the campus the week before she started the new school year. She's gone to plenty homecoming games with her father, his school friends and their kids. To her and her father, everything she does up until her high school diploma is placed in her hand is for Yale. Not even an acceptance letter will satisfy her father. To him, their goal for Yale is fulfilled once she has stepped foot on the campus as an official student. But see, here is the thing. At some point during her high school career, Visaera has lost sight of that goal. While she still believes Yale is an amazing school, she's started to recognize that it isn't the right fit for her. She no longer "sees" herself walking across campus every day to get from one class to another. There is no more excitement even talking about Yale. In fact, the only excitement she feels is whatever she picks up from her father. Unfortunately, it is that very reason she has yet to tell him that Yale is no longer a long term goal of hers. For now, she intends to still apply, but will also exert the same amount of energy into applying to other universities. She has yet to find the actual school that best fits her, but she hopes it will present itself once it is application time.
»;█ ( FACT O11 ) ❋ tab She has a unique interest in flying. Anytime she travels and it requires flying to the destination, she will always aim for a window seat and that window will stay open the entire flight (so long as she is allowed to). There is something so majestic about being able to see the world from the skies that has always intrigued her and it always takes her breath away. This only worsened when she and her childhood friends went paragliding once during summer vacation. She was addicted to the sensation of being in the air. It is now one of her dreams to go paragliding once again (maybe even hang gliding) AND to try skydiving.
»;█ ( FACT O12 ) ❋ tab A lot of people in Visaera's life—even her own family—have made comment on her busy schedule. Some have voiced concerns that between her classes (both at her school and the college courses she can take at the community college) and her extracurriculars she is well on her way to burning out before college. But the truth is, despite the sheer exhaustion she may feel sometimes, Visaera leans heavily on her busy schedule. She uses her busy schedule as a defense mechanism. She dislikes being idle with very little to nothing to do. For, you see, the moments when it is quiet for Visaera is when the intrusive thoughts invade. This is the one thing she insists on keeping secret from her parents and her friends. It's hard to say when exactly she started struggling with these dark thoughts, but when she first acknowledged that they were there, it hit her like a truck and for a few days she was unable to do anything outside her bedroom. After that day, she learned that keeping herself busy pushes away any chance of these thoughts getting any kind of strength. But the few times that they do slip through her mind, instant guilt pours through her. After all, what reason does she have to feel these things when her entire life has been so fortunate? So to combat the impending destruction, she works herself to almost complete exhaustion so that she could go to bed and sleep immediately.
»;█ ( FACT O13 ) ❋ tab Visaera has an immaculate way with words. Throughout high school, many in the debate team have grieved that she has little time to commit to joining. She isn't entirely argumentative, unless she has to be for a class assignment, but Visaera has this way of picking up on details from other people to help hook them in to whatever she has to say. Some say she is empathetic, but she disagrees. It is more so the ability to pick up on nonverbal cues. Once she has that, she maneuvers her arguments or pitches to best attract her listener.
»;█ ( FACT O14 ) ❋ tab As much as the Celtigars like to play it off to the public that they are a close knit family, Visaera is not close to any of her relatives. Every year they travel to Baltimore, conversations with cousins are typically bragging contests. One cousin will brag about getting into this Ivy League. Another will talk for ages about a prestigious internship they snagged. Another will go into great lengths about the journey they took to win some award. And it doesn't stop with the cousins. She has often overheard her parents get into near sparring matches with uncles and aunts over which child is the most successful. And with her father being one of the youngest siblings, he dives in fiercely to brag about all of her accomplishments. Now that she is older, taking trips back to Baltimore has become more a chore for her than a pleasure.
»;█ ( FACT O15 ) ❋ tab Whenever she can find any kind of spare time, Visaera enjoys checking out thrift stores and used bookstores. And she will always come out with something. She is a little embarrassed of how full her closet is with clothes she has yet to wear and bookshelves full of books she has yet to read. More often than not, she will end up donating some of the clothes she's bought at thrift stores without even having worn them. But she still finds herself going to them and always coming out with something that caught her attention. But she can find herself browsing for hours if she didn't have to keep track of time.
»;█ ( FACT O16 ) ❋ tab For much of Visaera's high school career, she has been dubbed the "princess" of the school solely for her volunteer efforts and overall academic record. While she may not necessarily be in the running for valedictorian, she is more known for offering to schedule study sessions for classmates that might need a little extra help on homework. Then there is her many hours of volunteer work between multiple clubs. Every year Visaera is acknowledged for her involvement in the community through her volunteer work. In the beginning, calling Visaera "princess" was a playful tease among her friends. However, it very quickly spread and stuck. Visaera for her part doesn't mind the title, but she also doesn't encourage it. She just simply smiles and lets people have their fun.
»;█ ( FACT O17 ) ❋ tab After volunteering for a semester at a senior living facility in her junior year, Visaera picked up on what her friends affectionately call "old lady hobbies." In other words, she got really into crafting; more specifically crochet. Now, keep in mind that this is still a fairly new hobby so she is nowhere near great at it. In fact, her need to perfect her lines is the reason she makes weekly visits to the senior living facility because she befriended a couple of the ladies who helped her develop this hobby. She doesn't crochet all the time, but occasionally you can find her in class with a hook and some brightly colored yarn in her hands. Oh, and don't get her started on her yarn collection. Yeah, it is basically a collection. Despite it taking long to complete projects, Visaera has a bad habit of coming out of craft stores with more yarn than she can get through. So now her room has baskets full of yarn for any new projects she has in mind. ​

 

[JINFINITE]

* ( CURRENTLY PLAYING ) ❋x♚x❋

»;█ ( OO1 ) ❋ tab title track - machine gun kelly
»;█ ( OO2 ) ❋ tab daywalker! - machine gun kelly ft. corpse
»;█ ( OO3 ) ❋ tab fleabag - yungblud
»;█ ( OO4 ) ❋ tab all i know - machine gun kelly ft. trippie redd
»;█ ( OO5 ) ❋ tab light switch - youth fountain
»;█ ( OO6 ) ❋ tab love or chemistry - nothing,nowhere.
»;█ ( OO7 ) ❋ tab bad habits - nerv
»;█ ( OO8 ) ❋ tab more than life - machine gun kelly ft. glaive
»;█ ( OO9 ) ❋ tab bloody valentine - machine gun kelly
»;█ ( O1O ) ❋ tab twin flame - machine gun kelly ​

tab tabYOU`RE TOO GOOD FOR ME tab I`M TOO BAD TO KEEP tab I WANT YOU ONLY
██ ░ VIRYS TARGARYEN ◢
╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱╱
tabtab tabtab YOU TOLD ME YOU LOVE ME BUT MY TRAUMA DOESN’T TRUST THAT ​

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ * ( THE BASICS ) ❋ x ♚ x ❋

»;█ ( NAME ) ❋ tab virys targaryen
»;█ ( NICKNAME ) ❋ tab his sister has long called him vi, but otherwise virys doesn’t have any loving nicknames. only derogatory ones or “titles” that come and go with each new rumor that circulates about him.
»;█ ( AGE ) ❋ tab eighteen
»;█ ( BIRTHDATE ) ❋ tab june thirteenth
»;█ ( HEIGHT ) ❋ tab six foot four
»;█ ( EYE & HAIR COLOR ) ❋ tab steel bluetab platinum
»;█ ( SEXUALITY ) ❋ tab asexual—demisexual
»;█ ( BIRTH PLACE ) ❋ tab miami, florida
»;█ ( PROFESSION ) ❋ tab student on the verge of dropping out—aspiring musician ​

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ * ( MY ATTITUDE ) ❋ x ♚ x ❋

DEVOTED X ▬ ❋ x ) x very loving or loyal.
PROTECTIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x having or showing a strong wish to keep someone or something safe from harm.
RESILIENT X ▬ ❋ x ) x (of a person or animal) able to withstand or recover quickly from difficult conditions.
TALENTED X ▬ ❋ x ) x having a natural aptitude or skill for something.
COMPETITIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x having or displaying a strong desire to be more successful than others.
COMPULSIVE X ▬ ❋ x ) x resulting from or relating to an irresistible urge, especially one that is against one's conscious wishes.
INTENSE X ▬ ❋ x ) x having or showing strong feelings or opinions; extremely earnest or serious.
CYNICAL X ▬ ❋ x ) x believing that people are motivated by self-interest; distrustful of human sincerity or integrity.
DANGEROUS X ▬ ❋ x ) x able or likely to cause harm or injury.
DISCONNECTED X ▬ ❋ x ) x (of a person) lacking contact with reality.
OBSTINATE X ▬ ❋ x ) x stubbornly refusing to change one's opinion or chosen course of action, despite attempts to persuade one to do so.
UNSTABLE X ▬ ❋ x ) x prone to psychiatric problems or sudden changes of mood.
UNTRUSTING X ▬ ❋ x ) x not tending to believe in other people's honesty or sincerity; suspicious.​

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆ * ( ALL ABOUT ME ) ❋ x ♚ x ❋

»;█ ( FACT OO1 ) ❋ tab virys does not believe in love. in any capacity of the word: romantic relationships, sexual relationships, even familial relationships. the word “love” means nothing to him. he believes it’s more along the lines of a fake courtesy. but this is due to having never experienced it himself. his own mother wanted nothing to do with him. his father claimed to love him yet dumped him on the doorstep of his first marriage; clearly love isn’t real if his father started a second family—a second family that didn’t turn out to be much better than his first. his “stepmother” has never cared for him and his half siblings have turned home into hell for him. girls at school have only ever wanted him for sex, status or money—boys too. virys has never felt love and so clearly it doesn’t actually exist. love is the biggest conspiracy theory of the entire world.
»;█ ( FACT OO2 ) ❋ tab in addition to his strong reservation against emotional love, virys has trouble with sexual intimacy. that is to say, most things that turn on other boys his age don’t work on him. and they never have. believing that something was wrong with him, virys projected this sexual persona for several years until it became a large portion of his identity. he became obsessed with sex, wanting desperately to figure out why he was different and thinking that he could fix himself. that maybe if he could be normal that the rest of the broken pieces of his life might come back together. presently he’s fallen so far down the rabbit hole that it’s out of his control. he’s slept with enough people(cis girls mostly but not exclusively), to have earned him a manwhore reputation. yet at the same time his dissatisfied sex life has kept his standards high enough that he’s far from easy. he won’t sleep with just anyone, in fact these days he’s mostly only sexually active with his friend and drug dealer, madison harper.
»;█ ( FACT OO3 ) ❋ tab drugs were always a part of virys’ life. he was born to a rockstar father, passed along to an ex-groupie “stepmother”, and then raised among siblings several years older than him. he was exposed to the good, the bad and desensitized to the ugly earlier than most. and so it was only natural for him to pick up his own habits. virys has tried his share of party drugs and alcohol, most of it due to peer pressure from his older half brothers. and it was actually through them that he met madison—madi. but virys generally isn’t one for hard drugs, he prefers to just smoke. it helps ease his anxiety and relax in a world that has been out to get him since he was born.
»;█ ( FACT OO4 ) ❋ tab as you have probably guessed, following the stereotype, school is not virys’ strong suit. it’s not that he’s dumb, far from it actually. but he simply doesn’t care enough and his grades suffer for it. he is actually quite clever and quick to pick up on things, but skipping class to get high and blatantly not doing the work has left a large discrepancy between him and his classmates. as such he’s been balancing on the verge of failing out of school and his academic future is bleak.
»;█ ( FACT OO5 ) ❋ tab luckily for him, his interest in music, combined with his father’s fame, doesn’t require a degree for success. though it wouldn’t hurt to help combat the rumors and bad rap he’s accumulated over the years. virys has long been in a back and forth battle with himself over whether or not he truly wants to pursue music. it’s something he genuinely enjoys, and has the natural talent for. but at times he feels as though he is stuck in his father’s shadow and that his own demons will forever hold him back. there’s nothing quite as discouraging as being compared to another and told you’re not good enough solely on someone’s first impression of you. and that has happened so many times to virys, and it’s been steadily eating away at his self esteem and drive, leaving him unmotivated and depressed in regards to the one thing in life he truly enjoys.
»;█ ( FACT OO6 ) ❋ tab another less known talent of his is his knowledge of high valyrian. while not fluent, it is technically his first language and he’s at least conversational in it. he doesn’t know the grammatical terms for things (prepositions and adverbs—what?), has a hard time formulating sentences, and is much better at understanding others than speaking it himself. but he thought it would be an easy a to take the class upon seeing it was offered in his high school, however learning it ”proper” in a school setting had proved to be much more difficult than his experience of using it at home.
»;█ ( FACT OO7 ) ❋ tab another difficulty he’s had is with therapy. he’s had a few different diagnosis over the years, with various forms of treatment recommended ranging from simple counseling to complicated regimens. however virys has never stuck through anything long enough to reap any benefits or see any improvements. instead he self medicates and everyone else in his life gets to experience the ups and downs alongside him.
»;█ ( FACT OO8 ) ❋ tab the instability isn’t a new thing though, it’s been a constant in his life even before he was born. during an early ultrasound it was revealed that he was to be a twin, but by the next appointment his other half was gone. a phenomenon known as vanishing twin syndrome; and with it went his health. he had been sharing a placenta with his twin and after they were absorbed his tiny body suffered for a while while his mother’s body recovered and adjusted. he became a high risk pregnancy from that point on and his mother was advised against traveling and to be extra careful so as to not lose her remaining child as well. however his mother’s indifference towards him had already began. she was scared that she was losing herself and her own life as now all anyone talked to her about was her baby. as such she rebelled against the doctor’s orders and did as she pleased, and it was due to her recklessness that virys ended up being born in florida of all places. his parents were there for an event when his mother went into labor. despite being so small, virys’ birth was a long and complicated one in part to his already poor health, and it was also for that reason that the family ended up staying in florida with his mother’s sister for close to two months until he was finally cleared from the nicu. he struggled as an infant and that touch and go was likely a main contributing factor to why his mother rejected him in the end. rather than going full maternal over her sick baby, she went the complete opposite direction and if anything she was scared of him. scared of how fragile he was. scared she would mess things up. scared she would be a bad mother, and then combined with the fact that she never actually wanted this in the first place. but virys was blind to her aversion until he turned ten years old when she finally cracked, feeling like she had lost the past ten years of her life to being a mother despite how little she had actually been involved in his upbringing. the solution ended up being to send little virys up north to live with his father’s first family in berkeley, who virys had never met and knew next to nothing about.
»;█ ( FACT OO9 ) ❋ tab virys flew as an unaccompanied minor at ten years old, leaving his family behind to go live with complete strangers who wanted almost as little to do with him as his own mother. he went from being an only child to being the youngest of six and the age gaps only made the transition even more difficult. and while two of his siblings ultimately warmed up to him, it wasn’t enough to offset the abuse he suffered through at the hands of the other three and his new guardian: his “stepmother”. living in berkeley has been arguably worse for virys than los angeles was and his steady downward spiral is there to show for it. his two eldest brothers are the ones who have been the most dangerous, which, considering their large age gap definitely turns it from sibling quarrels to full on abuse. there is no reason for a nearly twenty year old adult to be smacking around a ten year old child as a means of stress relief and entertainment. his two half sisters were second oldest, both just a year apart from one another. but the close proximity of their ages did little to strengthen their own bond. one sister sided more so with their brothers, while the other took virys under her wing as best she could. he hasn’t always been receptive to her kindness, but she remains a constant support—the closest to a mother figure he’s ever had. his last brother is the closest in age to him and has arguably made the most efforts as far as bonding with virys. it’s not quite a two way street between them, his brother definitely tries harder and cares more than virys. but of all his siblings, he is the one virys gets along with the most.
»;█ ( FACT O1O ) ❋ tab you would think that with such large age gaps that virys would no longer be tormented by his siblings because surely by now everyone has moved out. but no, only his sisters have left the family home. one married and the other left during college and never came back. leaving virys with all three of his brothers as well as their mother. his oldest brother owns his own company and makes bank but has spent his whole life taking advantage of everything their father pays for in exchange for virys living under their roof. so he has opted to save every penny he makes and lives comfortably working from home. the second oldest stayed out of spite. “if virys gets to live luxuriously then so should i”. he’s been wildly unsuccessful at securing his own identity and has jumped careers several times already. he’s obsessed with virys in his own way, blaming the baby of the family for all his own failures. and then his third brother currently attends uc berkeley. he had originally moved out for the college experience, but he moved back home after virys had been subjected to the worst year of abuse yet. and that is how virys lives with four grown adults and most everything is paid for by his father.
»;█ ( FACT O11 ) ❋ tab while virys’ relationship with his birth mother would be classified as strained at best, his on and off relationship with father has been a toxic tortuous tease his entire life. virys has spent years fighting for his mother’s affection and then being disappointed every single time. while in contrast his father has openly made efforts to show his love, and it is instead virys who has trouble accepting it. living in near opposite ends of california has made it difficult to visit over the years, but his father has done his best whilst balancing his wife and rockstar career. unfortunately for him though, virys’ needs and expectations have always been higher than he is capable of meeting. as such virys’ feelings surrounding his father flip flop between striving to please him and then blaming him for everything wrong with his life. virys openly hates his father for all that’s happened to him, but his father has also been the one to treat him the best and they were close when he was a kid. the contradicting emotions leave virys in this constant state of “pick a door”. behind door number one is more emotional baggage to carry. but behind door number two is the chance of a nice memory that virys will cherish until eventually it gets torn to shreds the next time the first door opens instead. like the time he flew down to visit his parents, and his father ended up turning the return trip into a father son drive from la to the bay. they drove his vintage 1967 ford mustang fastback up from la together and his father then gifted it to him for his upcoming sixteenth birthday when they reached berkeley. then just a few days later one of his brothers assaulted him, likely jealous of virys’ better relationship with their father, and virys spent the evening of his birthday in urgent care. but rather than retaliating against his brother, virys passed the blame to his father for having returned him back to this living hell in the first place, thus shattering the good memories of their road trip and breaking their fragile relationship yet again.
»;█ ( FACT O12 ) ❋ tab virys is quite literally the epitome of the phrase “lonely in a crowded room”. he’s been surrounded by people his entire life, whether with his large extended family or due to his popularity throughout his years at school. but virys has struggled all his life to bond with anyone. at home he’s extremely isolated and unloved. and then at school, while he might not be everyone’s favorite, he’s still well known and socialized. but no one at school really knows him, neither does anyone at home. not truly anyways. virys’ closest connection to anyone would be the one he has with his pet, a female bearded dragon he named toothless. and while toothless might not be as affectionate or personable as a dog or cat might be, she has still served the same purpose of easing his loneliness and giving him something to live for. not that his entire life is held in the palm of her scaly foot, but having someone depending on him has given him a sense of importance in a world that had otherwise told him he’s worthless.
»;█ ( FACT O13 ) ❋ tab it should come as no surprise to hear that virys’ reputation includes violence, with a fine gray line between fact and fiction. the truth is that yes, virys has violent tendencies. and yes there is also most likely some truth behind any stories one might hear. but he is also a victim of exaggeration—that people blow things out of proportion and make assumptions when they don’t know all the details. a truth behind his violent nature though is that he is so numb to the physical pain that he’s unable to recognize his own body’s limitations. virys is so damaged at this point, emotionally, physically, or too intoxicated, that his pain tolerance is through the roof, and it actually puts him in a dangerous position. for instance being unable to distinguish the severity of an injury when he’s hurt. or not feeling any pain in his own hand when punching something…or someone…and so it’s too easy to just get tunnel vision and keep going, and going, and going….yes he’s beaten someone unconscious before. and yes his own hand was bruised for over a week afterwards.
»;█ ( FACT O14 ) ❋ tab unfortunately that numbness isn’t exclusive to physical pain. when his hurt and temper merge into one, virys reaches a point where he loses any sense of self worth or rational thinking—his self preservation drops below zero. it’s when he’s in this dangerous state of mind that it’s probably best to steer clear, but it’s also when he’s the biggest danger to himself. virys doesn’t exactly have a history of self harm, not intentionally at least. but when he reaches this point his brain short circuits and he’s unable to process cause and effect. he would boldly cross a busy intersection, walking as though expecting everyone to slam on the breaks for him. squeeze or smash whatever is in his hand without regard to the possibility that it could break and hurt him. and ever since getting his own car he has adopted a particularly dangerous habit of going alone for a drive. of going too fast and taking risks that could easily end his life if he so much as blinked at the wrong moment. he’ll drive until the adrenaline passes, until he comes down from the high and is able to feel things again.
»;█ ( FACT O15 ) ❋ tab his pain tolerance does come in handy though when it comes to his most obvious form of self expression: tattoos. he got his first tattoo at fourteen years old and it’s been an addiction of his ever since. most of them he got illegally, that is to say that there was no parental consent given nor were they done in a proper shop. the perks of having always hung out with an older crowd on account of his siblings and of having a famous musician for a father.
»;█ ( FACT O16 ) ❋ tab he’s not superstitious but virys is definitely a little bit-stitous. he reads into things and connects dots whether they’re related or not. his delusions turn nothings into somethings. it can be very difficult to reason with him if he’s mentally already accepted something as truth. virys would be the one to take it personally when something out of anyone’s control troubles him. to take it personally and then blame the other for it. had to cancel because you got a flat tire? in virys’ broken mind, if you really cared you would have found a way to get to him. or on the flip side, finding the tiniest of connections and viewing it as a sign that it was meant to be. like if you were to like the same music as him, it could easily lead virys into believing that you have an understanding of him, because clearly if you like the same music then you must feel similarly to him. virys really maxes out the phrase “point of view”. these delusions aren’t a constant. they come and go and there’s no telling when one will trigger, but they make it near impossible for him to maintain healthy relationships with other human beings when his mind sets these unrealistic expectations and creates false meanings behind others’ words and actions.
»;█ ( FACT O17 ) ❋ tab it’s pretty safe to say that virys generally doesn’t even try to make friends. not anymore at least. he was fairly social for most of his life, but the past couple years he has definitely closed himself off more and more. not that he’s been shunning the friends and connections he’s already made, but virys isn’t interested in making new ones. besides having to deal with his own demons, juggling his princely fame has taken a lot out of him. it was nice in the beginning, in fact virys used to love the attention he got at school in contrast to how hated he was at home. but the novelty has since worn off considerably. he’s found it exhausting having to balance the four sides that make up his life. as if it’s not hard enough being himself, having to also be the most hated, the most loved and the most unwanted all at once has taken a huge toll on him. and a large part of it all links back to his father being a king of rock. at school he is often put on a pedestal and fawned over. while at home he’s only tolerated because of the cash flow his existence comes with. and then there are his scattered interactions with the media who love to compare him to his father and turn his mistakes into headlines. luckily it doesn’t happen too often, living in berkeley has removed much of the pressure that comes with being born into music royalty. but he’s seen the articles written about him. the posts on social media. everything just further confirms that he wants nothing to do with people, and if he can’t change their wrong opinions of him then he’ll just give them what they want, he’ll be the black sheep they all say he is—the child born with horns.
»;█ ( FACT O18 ) ❋ tab it’s not uncommon for virys to go off on his own in attempt to get away from all the chaos that is his life. you’ll usually find him high. not just on weed, but literally as high up as he can get. his favorite spots to be alone are on rooftops, climbing the campanile, or to sit in his car along grizzly peak. there’s something calming and cathartic about being able to see such a large scope of the world—to escape from whatever claustrophobic bubble he’s been forced into and escape from all the rules, expectations and oppression that come with his life.
»;█ ( FACT O19 ) ❋ tab and in case you were wondering, yes the malfoy blonde hair is all natural. thank you pure valyrian bloodlines. he rarely cuts it, preferring it shaggy and borderline touching his shoulders. and so the times he has were either by force when he was younger, or during a mental breakdown. he has been convinced to trim it on occasion after it reaches his shoulders, most commonly at the hands of his older sister, but virys otherwise leaves it messy, blonde and long.​

 

[feelsHASkilig]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VISAERA CELTIGAR ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 061322 tab ❖ LOCATION — visaera's bedroom tab ❖ COMPANY — deric
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

“Sephi?” Visaera lost herself in a memory. Of a fourteen year old boy with a head full of blonde hair so white it could be considered silver. She remembered that even at that age he was tall. Well, everyone has been taller than her since she was twelve, but still. This boy was much taller than many other students in their year. She remembered the first time she saw his eyes, so strikingly blue it stopped many girls in the halls. Visaera included despite having dealt with her own blue eyes her entire life. She remembered her excitement the first time she heard his name: Virys Targaryen. He was the first Valyrian she’s met outside her family. His name made every physical trait about him make sense, and from that moment, she wanted him to be her friend. After all—even though she was only half Valyrian—they had to stick together.

“Sephi.” She had a vague memory of the last time they hung out together. It was the lunch hour a month into the semester. By now Visaera had compiled her list of clubs and other extracurriculars thanks to Deric’s advice. And while she had a meeting for Key Club that day, she agreed to have lunch with Virys after not having seen him outside of their shared class. What Visaera wouldn’t know until much later is that this lunch would be the last time they shared a table together. From that moment on, she rarely saw him around the lunch area. As for his desk at their class? It lacked his presence just as much. By the time she realized they had a natural falling out, the first set of rumors about him started to spread around school.

Someone behind her cleared their throat sternly. A pause and then, “Visaera.” But the voice might as well be in a whole other room as the memory of last week played fresh in her mind. She stepped foot into Mister Luwin’s classroom absentmindedly brainstorming ideas for the first tutoring lesson even though they hadn’t even started yet. The High Valyrian teacher reached out to her earlier that week to ask if she would be available during this year’s summer school session to personally tutor one of his students. He enticed her with a summer internship opportunity, but if she was to be honest, she would have said yes without the chance to add another bullet point to her already impressive resume. She loved the language that much. But still, some extra volunteer hours didn’t hurt anyone, right?

The truth was that Visaera almost didn’t recognize her old freshman year friend. Sure, she had seen him around campus every once in a while on the way to one of her classes or a club meeting. But after that one class, they hadn’t shared another since. The rumors around school were that he didn’t bother trying in his classes. Whether or not he was actually passing the classes he did have was all just speculation. So when she walked into the High Valyrian classroom to find him sitting at one of the desks in the middle of Mister Luwin discussing summer school, she admittedly was not surprised. She was, however, disappointed. After all, he was the only pure blooded Valyrian in their high school. If there was anyone that should pass High Valyrian with flying colors, it should be him. And yet, as both teacher and student turned to watch her entrance, she couldn’t deny the truth.

“Visaera Josephine, are you even listening to me?”

Visaera blinked then turned to look behind her. The last remnants of her memory faded like smoke as her father came into focus. “I’m sorry?” Her father let out an exasperated sigh then walked around the kitchen island to stand in front of her. This was the first time in weeks she saw the man in anything but a suit and for a moment she needed to just stare at him to let it sink in. It wasn’t like he was wearing anything drastic. But seeing her father in a striped polo shirt and slacks was just…so casual. She tried to remember the last time they spent time together that didn’t involve him dropping her off at school before heading into the city for work. She ended up digging a little too far back.

“Are we present?” her father asked, concerned. “Everything well, honey?”

Without hesitation, Visaera smiled brightly at him. “Yes, everything’s fine. Just got a little lost in thought about the tutoring I’m starting on Wednesday.” She saw no reason to lie to her father. Her parents were aware that she was going to start tutoring High Valyrian this week. Of course, she didn’t tell them exactly who it was she was tutoring, nor did they exactly seem to care too much to ask. She assumed that it had everything to do with the fact that she was essentially going to get some kind of credit from this summer schedule. But also, the truth was that she probably wouldn’t have mentioned Virys at all unless they really wanted to know. She learned a long time ago that any mention of Aerys Targaryen—the famous king of rock—in their house led to some tense awkwardness that she didn’t understand to this day. She couldn’t imagine mentioning the rockstar’s son would result in anything better.

Her father nodded slowly at her response then looked down at what she was doing. “Your mom asked me to look for you. Said something about having sent you in here to grab extra bowls a while ago.” His eyes once again darted to the stack of glass bowls in her hands. “Would you like help?”

“Oh,” Visaera too dropped her gaze to the bowls. “Actually, that would be great. I, uh, also need help getting the rest from the top shelf. Saves me from having to dig out the step ladder.” Both father and daughter laughed. Because of course her mother would ask her to get things from the kitchen that were impossible for her to grab unassisted.

With two stacks of glass bowls carried between them, Visaera led the way out of the kitchen and into the backyard where a whole party setup was almost complete. The double doors of the pool house were wide open as a long rectangular table just barely poked out from over the open threshold. Said long table was draped in a deep purple cover with a silver runner spread along the middle. On top of the runner were platters upon platters of food. At the very end of the table pointed in the direction of the currently calm pool were a variety of drinks all in large glass bowls with matching ladles poking out to the side. As she walked over to the food and drinks table, Visaera watched her mother expertly assign and maneuver many of the catering staff to where she deemed them appropriate.

“Found the bowls. What are they for and where do you need them?” For the rest of the morning, Visaera helped her parents set up the rest of the party. Rows of tables were lined up along the expanse of grass to the side of the pool near the gate that leads out to the front. The lounge chairs that typically hid away in the storage unit behind the pool house were now lined up around the pool. All around Visaera was decorated in deep purple and silver. Not just the tables. Bundles of balloons floated in purple and silver as well as curly streamers. And then, stationed against the clean white wall of the house was the backdrop for commemorative photos. It was decorated with the same balloons, only this time they were shaped into an arch. Streamers curtained down the middle of the arch to cover the blank space. And floating strategically in the very middle of it all were giant silver balloons—one in the shape of a “1” and the other an “8”.

Visaera took one long look at her party while it was only the catering staff moving around preparing everything. In an hour’s time, all the decorations would be lost among the many guests she and her parents invited for today.

Shockingly, her mother seemed to pick up on that too. As she contemplated just taking a dip into the pool while she waited for her friends to arrive, her mother called out to her to take pictures at the photo booth area while the backdrop was in “pristine condition.” Well, it’s a good thing she was already changed for the party. As she walked over to her parents now standing in front of the backdrop, she smoothed out her sundress and fixed the thin strap so it rested perfectly on her shoulders. She was directed by her mother where to stand and how to pose, but soon enough she went a little silly and offered her parents some funnier poses that got a laugh out of both of them. Her heart felt lighter at the sight of her parents laughing and smiling. It wasn’t often that she saw them together because of the long hours her father worked. She was glad that her birthday offered such an opportunity for all of them to spend time together.

At least until the first group of guests showed up right on time.

While her parents moved about greeting and conversing with various groups of guests spread throughout the party, Visaera was currently perched on the shoulders of her best friend, Deric Tyrell, as they waded through the man-made waves thrashing across her pool. Their eyes stared with determination at the other pairing at the other side of the shallow end. All around them were cheers from their friends. With a final squeeze of her thigh, Deric pushed forward until Visaera was close enough to grab at the outstretched hands of her other best friend, Macy Arryn. As soon as her fingers locked with the other girl’s, a fire erupted in Visaera’s eyes as a singular thought ran through her mind: win.

Minutes later, Visaera was surrounded by cheers and laughter, as well as a nose full of water. As she resurfaced from the bottom of the shallow end of the pool, she shook her damp hair out of her face then wiped at her eyes. She immediately registered that almost everyone surrounding the edges of the pool were watching her, waiting for her to take her celebratory victory lap or something to mark her win. Instead Visaera simply flashed the brightest smile her lips could possibly manage as she swam over to one end of the pool where Deric was pulling himself out. She watched the water drip off his swim trunks and down his bare back. For the briefest moment, she thought she felt her heart flutter at the sight. Then he turned and leaned forward with his hand outstretched to her to take. Staring deep into his warm eyes, all that was left was the ever present comfort she always associated with him.

As soon as she was out of the pool, Deric already had a fresh towel in his hands ready for her. She thanked him with a wide grin as she took a step closer to him to accept the towel. Before she could even have a chance to grab it, he also moved in then wrapped it around her, as well as his arms. Wolf whistles, oohs and giggles could be heard all around them and Visaera couldn’t help but blush. Before long, it felt like every pair of eyes at the party were looking at her. Most especially the members of the Celtigar family that were currently in California attending on behalf of her grandparents. As much as she wanted to investigate this sinking feeling, she instead pretended like she didn’t notice and focused on Deric’s charming, but teasing smirk. Heart, meet flutter.

“Visaera!” It was amazing how well her mother could project her voice even from the other side of the party.

Visaera blinked away from Deric’s charming gaze then pulled away from his embrace. Their friends were all still around them throwing suggestive looks. After shooting a playful glare at Macy—who was making taunting kissing noises close to her ear—she turned in the general direction she heard her mother’s voice. Not even a second later, she saw her mother’s bright dress flow past various guests as she walked over to her.

“Your aunt and uncle are preparing to leave,” her mother explained after a brief once over at her soaked appearance under the towel. “Could you please dry up and change back into your dress? Your father and uncle would like to take a picture with you for your grandfather.” She didn’t need to say any more. With a quick nod, she took her sundress from her mother then politely excused herself from her friends. Instead of walking over to the open pool house to wash up and change, she decided it would be better to return to her room. It wouldn’t be a wise decision to simply rinse off the pool water from her hair and body to take a picture with her father and her uncle, especially since this picture would be immediately sent to her grandfather.

She worked as fast as she could to rinse off the pool water from her hair and body and then dry her hair enough to be styled. It was definitely not going to be the same curls she had at the beginning of the party, but cute waves would have to do. She was in the process of redoing her makeup when her eyes fell on her cellphone. She had left it upstairs once the guests started arriving. Considering she would be playing hostess and moving around the party a lot, there just seemed no point carrying it with her. Besides, she was certain there would be plenty of pictures sent to her by the end of the day for her to choose from should she decide to post on Instagram or Facebook. When she tapped the dark screen to wake it up, she was not surprised to find numerous notifications waiting for her. Text messages. DMs. Certain relatives on Messenger. And even a couple emails from previous teachers and advisors. All of them sent birthday greetings that she made a mental note to read and respond to once the party was over. After one last scroll through her notifications, she locked her phone to finish with her makeup.

It was already in her mind she was making her aunt and uncle wait. However, that didn’t stop Visaera from once more glancing down at her phone after putting away her lip gloss. She didn’t know where the temptation came from, but one moment she was focusing intently on her reflection so as to not smudge her makeup and the next she was recalling hooded blue eyes. Still so enchanting three years later. And then those eyes turned into a continuation of her memory from earlier in the kitchen. This time, she stood with Virys outside Mister Luwin’s classroom as they discussed scheduling for their upcoming tutoring sessions for the summer.

Honestly, the conversation sort of felt like Visaera was pulling teeth. She could tell instantly that he was not thrilled about the idea of tutoring, but they were already assigned to each other and they might as well make the most out of it. But, still, a part of her was a little bummed that he wasn’t as excited as she was to be…well…”reunited.” Could she even consider this a reunion with an old friend? After all, they barely said anything to each other outside of “hi” since their last lunch together back in freshman year. Did she expect they would utilize this opportunity to rekindle their past friendship?

“I know we agreed to meet Monday, Wednesday, Friday, but do you mind if we have our first meeting on Wednesday? It’s my birthday on Monday and I already have plans,” Visaera asked Virys, scrolling through her Google Calendar to double check her schedule for the following week. “Or, I mean, we could also meet Friday—”

“Me too.” When did his voice get so low and…hoarse? If she didn’t already believe the rumors about Virys using drugs, hearing his voice would have to force her to believe it. When she looked up at him, whatever read on her face must have urged him to continue with, “It’s my birthday too…on Monday.”

“What are you doingggg?” Visaera groaned to herself. “You already greeted him in advance last week.” And yet she continued to pick up her phone to open Instagram. As the son of a famous rockstar, it didn’t take too long to find Virys’ profile. Plus, despite their different friend groups, they had enough mutuals at their school to make it just a little easier for her.

She contemplated her next move. Should she follow him now that she found his account? It wasn’t like it was private so she didn’t have to follow him to view his posts. But at the same time, they were friends once so it wouldn’t be too out of character to follow him. And, besides, his follower count far surpassed hers thanks to his father and his overall popularity. She suspected having one more follower notification would go right over his head.

Then again…would she care less if he ignored the fact that she followed him?

Maybe she’ll bookmark that thought for another time. For now, she had one important thing to do that required finding his Instagram account.

Instagram DM

Rytsas Virys! LOL xD I figure you’re probably too busy rn to see this but I just wanted to wish you a happy birthday! Hope 18 is going great for you so far and see you on Wednesday!

​

The nerves immediately plummeted to the pit of her stomach the moment she pressed Send. Why was she so nervous? She was just sending a birthday greeting. It was the nice thing to do after finding out about a person's birthday. Especially when said birthday was exactly the same as hers. Until now she found herself so excited over this detail. Just, what were the odds?

But she didn’t have much time to stress over the possibility that Virys would see her message in the next few minutes. She jumped from the knock on her door, not having realized until that moment how focused she was on watching if Sent would change to Seen. As her heart raced, she called out to whoever was on the other side of the door to come in.

She watched as Deric slipped inside then closed the door as quietly as possible. Her brow arched curiously. “Did they send you up here to check on me? I’m almost done, I promise,” she explained while she quickly locked her phone.

Deric chuckled and ran a hand through his hair nervously. “Sort of…. Not really. I was hoping that we could have a moment alone before you had to go back downstairs.”

Visaera stood from her desk to walk over to him. “Everything okay?” she asked.

“Oh, yeah, of course,” Deric said quickly, offering her a reassuring smile. And there went the fluttering heartbeat again. Sometimes Visaera wondered if Deric Tyrell knew how much his charm affected her. “I just, uh—We just haven’t gotten to spend much time together today. Which, yes, I know it has everything to do with the fact that it is your birthday party, but still ....” He reached for her hand.

Visaera’s fingers instantly tightened around his hand. As she took another step closer, she felt herself being consumed by him. From the way his towering frame radiated with such comforting warmth to the calming effect his scent had on her. She could just feel her fluttering heart slow back to normal with each deep breath she took of his cologne. He must have washed up as well.

“I don’t know if I told you this already,” she started shyly through warm cheeks. “But I wanted to say thank you for coming today. I know you still have some things to do back at Yale before you’re back for the summer.”

Deric let out a low chuckle. “I wouldn’t dare miss your birthday. Besides,” his other hand wrapped around her waist, pulling her flush against him, “next year, you and I won’t have to coordinate schedules to celebrate your birthday. Because by then, we’ll both be at Yale. Just like we planned.”

Visaera fought to keep the smile on her face as she gazed up at her best friend’s warm eyes. For as long as she could remember, it was her and Deric’s dream to attend Yale together. They sacrificed too much to stay committed to this long term goal. They both knew that in the end, if they were patient enough, it would all be worth it in the end. However, she realized recently that her sight of their endgame was slowly growing dimmer and her gaze wandering. It wasn’t looking in another particular direction. It was more that she was losing that drive she once had imagining what her college future would look like once all her hard work finally earned her that acceptance letter.

Recently, she questioned if she still even wanted Yale as much as she thought she did her whole life.

Unfortunately, this was not something she could easily share or talk about with others. She definitely couldn’t tell Deric. Between the two of them, he has been the most patient. He was the one that suggested that they remain just friends despite the obvious feelings between them. It couldn’t have been easy for him to go to Yale for the past two years while holding onto a promise that was made with someone that was two years his junior. Even now, staring up at his happy expression, that eagerness to see the fruits of their labor was looking right back at her.

She also couldn’t talk to her and their friends about her indecision. Almost all of them were very much aware of the promise she and Deric made regarding defining their relationship. But unlike she and Deric, they were all impatiently waiting for the endgame.

She definitely couldn’t tell her parents. If there was anyone that was just as eager for her to finally get into Yale, it would be her father. It was his dream to have her attend his alma mater long before she was even born. And as much as she would like to think her mother would be the one person to understand, she also feared the small chance that she might not.

“Before we head back downstairs, I wanted to give you your gift.” Deric’s words cut right through her thoughts. When she once more focused on her present surroundings, Visaera watched him step away from her arms to reach into his front pants pocket. He pulled out a small black velvet box and immediately her head spun with ideas of what could possibly be inside. Her mind was reeling so much she overlooked when he outstretched said mystery box to her. She was barely able to recover and take it before it became a few more seconds to awkward.

Her hands were shaking and she didn’t know why. It wasn’t like she was expecting him to suddenly go from zero to a hundred just because it was her birthday. She just turned eighteen after all. And she still had one more year of high school. Still, Deric has never given her jewelry before. Not even when they were kids and the only jewelry she cared about involved colorful beads.

“Are you gonna open it?” She could hear his own nervousness in his voice.

With a shaky laugh, Visaera looked down at the small black box and opened it with bated breath. As soon as it was revealed what was inside, she gasped.

Although the Tyrell family was commonly known for their chain of grocery stores across the west coast and their growing monopoly on produce, they could also be recognized by what many in their world would call a sigil. Growing up with the Tyrells, she has seen plenty of members of the family with similar jewelry. The women typically wore necklaces or bracelets while the men exclusively wore a ring. Even Deric started wearing his ring after he started at Yale.

Now, apparently, she was being welcomed to wear one as well.

Visaera stared wide eyed at the gold rose pendant hanging oh so delicately against the background of black velvet. For something that was so familiar to her, looking at it while it was in her own hand made it feel foreign.

She looked over at Deric, taking in just how visibly nervous he was while watching her. How was it that even when he was so nervous he still looked so handsome? “Deric, are you sure?”

Deric blinked, but quickly recovered with his ever present smile. “I know we’re taking things slow, but I mean, we’re so close now. I figured, what the hell. We know what we want, and have known for years. We can bend the rules just a little bit.” He stepped closer again, closing the distance between them with one large step. Visaera inhaled deeply. “I was also thinking…” He was now staring only at the pendant resting between them. “Maybe when I come back for the summer we could…talk? Re-evaluate things?” He paused, lifting a surprisingly delicate finger to brush across the cold metal. “Only if you want to, of course.”

This was a lot to process. For nearly four years, Visaera conditioned herself to wait for Deric. Despite her growing feelings for him, she agreed to his suggestion that they take things slow because she believed he knew what was best. And if there was anyone that stuck to a goal, it was him. Now, he was asking her for the possibility to reconsider their years worth of plans. And if there was any indication that let her know he was being serious, it was the fact that he was asking her to wear his family’s sigil around her neck from this moment forward.

“Visaera?”

Her gaze slowly raised back up to his. As a mixture of emotions raged war inside her, she clung to the only solid ground she could reach. She was shocked by the simultaneous sensation of the cold from the pendant and Deric’s warm touch, but it was enough for the thoughts to quiet just enough for her to finally smile up at him.

“Can you help me put this on?” ​

 

[JINFINITE]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VIRYS TARGARYEN ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 061522 tab ❖ LOCATION — berkeley public library - central branch tab ❖ COMPANY — visaera
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

”Make sure you keep it down today, your brother has meetings all afternoon,” Initially it was unclear whether Virys had heard the warning as he continued on through the kitchen towards the refrigerator, all the while softly humming along with the music blaring out of the AirPods hidden beneath all his silver hair, ”Virys.”
He didn’t so much as glance in the woman’s direction, ”Virys—” She had reached out, probably intending to hold the refrigerator door shut until he acknowledged her, but instead her fingers slipped down the handle until they landed on Virys’ hand and finally his bright blue eyes narrowed on her from under his mess of a mop hair. It was apparent from the look on her face that she knew she fucked up. She had gone too far by physically touching him, even if it had been by accident. But she was the adult here. She was his parental figure and guardian and she would be damned if she backed down against the youngest Targaryen, ”You—”

Virys pulled his hand free with such force she nearly bit her own tongue in surprise and the two stood locked in a staredown for a moment with only his music as proof that time itself hadn’t stopped. As much control as she had over him and his life, Virys’ step mother—she wasn’t really even his stepmother but it was the closest fit for their relationship— was all too aware of how easily he could overpower her and ever since he surpassed her in height several years back she had grown more timid at standing up against him when they were alone.

There were a dozen words bubbling just below the surface, waiting for Virys to unleash on the woman, but in a rare display of self restraint he instead stayed silent and wordlessly returned his attention to the refrigerator, opening it with his right hand and then releasing the door to reach inside with the same hand. His left remained semi-uselessly at his side encased in bright neon pink from palm to just below his elbow.

Shutting the door, now with a yellow Gatorade in hand, Virys glanced back to his step mother seemingly ready to say something until heavy footsteps landed in the doorway behind him and a huge sense of dread welled up inside leaving him frozen, his body and mind indecisive between a fight or flight response, ”There’s the birthday boy!”

And there was the reason his left arm had been stuck in a cast for the past month. Virys could literally feel his step mother’s posture shift, standing up taller and growing brave with her son’s presence joining them in the kitchen. But Virys could no longer afford to waste any of his energy or attention on her and he instead turned so his back was to the refrigerator and his eyes trailed across the room to land on his older half brother, Daeron.

Most days Virys would put up a fight to defend himself, whether just verbally or physically if it came to it. But today he really just wanted to escape to his room to wait out the hours until his friends from school came to pick him up later tonight for his birthday. His grip tightened on the Gatorade, his feet bracing to either stand his ground or to be ready to push off and run at any moment, ”Finally eighteen, huh?”

Virys watched on with caution and was quick to catch Daeron’s subtle movements as he approached, casually rolling up his sleeves with each step as though preparing for something and wanting to get them out of the way. He was the only one to ever truly make Virys nervous, a fear response from the years of inappropriate and incessant bullying. With just about anyone else Virys was bold, cocky and impulsive. But when it came to Daeron he was honestly afraid. It wasn’t quite the same fear as one would experience with say an abusive lover or parent. After all Virys never expected anything nice to come from Daeron, ever. But what little self preservation he had left was completely devoted to protecting himself from the pain and torment his brothers put him through. That wasn’t to say he always cowered away. Virys quite frequently would push back and inadvertently escalate incidents; as shown by his fractured wrist. But he had only just woken up, hadn’t eaten, hadn’t smoked and didn’t have it in him to stand up to his family right now.

He had chosen flight.

As Daeron continued speaking, Virys stepped to the side, intending to escape through the second kitchen door to the side. Even though it was further from the stairs than the other door, it was a better option than trying to push past Daeron. Only Virys’ response time was so delayed right now that before he could process what was happening, Daeron was grabbing him by the front of his oversized hoodie and raising his other hand in a fist: birthday punches.

”Daeron, stop it!”

Virys’ mind and body finally managed to sync back together just in time and with both hands he shoved hard against his half brother’s chest to push him away, then bolted the second he felt his hoodie slip free. His heart was racing as he fled from the kitchen, literally sprinting through the house and taking the stairs two at a time. All the while hearing Daeron’s footsteps just paces behind him. Upon reaching his room he dropped the Gatorade, letting it hit the floor and with lightning quick speed that came from years of experience he grabbed the portable door lock that he kept hung on the back of his door: fitted it to his door and slammed it shut, sliding the metal keeper into place and then backing away as Daeron finally caught up to bang on the door with his immature taunts.

Virys’ music was still going in his ears but he could no longer hear it over the blood pulsing in his ears and his chest heaving to catch his breath, ”Fuck...”

It didn’t take long for Daeron to get bored and move on, but Virys’ eyes remained locked on the handle of his bedroom door even after he heard Daeron’s heavy steps down the hall. Once upon a time ago he had a normal lock on his door. It was later removed out of “concern for his well being” after locking himself away to the point the fire department were called in one too many times to break down the door. And so after years of living on edge and people barging into his room, Virys had purchased a portable door lock off Amazon earlier in the year and it was now the only way he felt safe in his own room.

And even though he knew Daeron was just toying with him, he still didn’t trust to risk it. Some days they could coexist. Some days they were at each other's throats. And then there were days like today where Daeron, a full grown adult, felt the need to torment him like a childhood playground bully. Only the thing about bullies is that everyone always says they just do it for attention and a reaction and that they’d get bored if you don’t respond to them. But that wasn’t the case when your bully frequented the gym and had the money to keep his home mini bar stocked, and Virys was very familiar with how quickly a joke could escalate into a dangerous situation. Like the “birthday punches” he nearly received downstairs. That was an activity for close friend groups. But coming from Daeron, there was no telling how far he would have taken it if left unchecked. And right now there was no one here to take Virys’ side.

His sister Saera, well, his half sister—they were all his half siblings actually, she had been his biggest protector growing up. But ever since she had left for college several years ago, there was a noticeable spike in Daeron’s behavior.

Their older brother Aegon left him alone for the most part these days, but turning a blind eye to the abuse was just as bad as partaking in it. And not to mention he had done his share when Virys was younger, and bullying a child was arguably worse than a giant of teenager who was fully capable of defending himself.

His other sister more so sided with Aegon in that she never cared for him but she was not active like Daeron or her mother in targeting him. Nor did she still live in the family house.

And then there was Jaehaerys. They were only a couple years apart in age and Jaehaerys had always made it a point to be welcoming to Virys. He was always patient with him and never held his temper against him when Virys was unable to control himself. He was never as successful as Saera at fending off his abusers, but he was always the first one to check in on him after an incident. Saera would be the one to talk him off of figurative ledges and Jaehaerys would be there to piece him back together when he jumped anyways.

But even though both Saera and Jaehaerys had since left home for college, Jaehaerys was the only one Virys was upset with for his choice. Maybe it was because they were closer in age. Saera always felt more maternal while Jaehaerys was like a best friend. Or maybe Saera escaped his wrath because at the time she left he still had Jaehaerys living at home. Whatever the exact reasoning was it no longer mattered, the damage had been done and felt irreversible at this point.

After Jaehaerys moved out for the full college experience, life at home intensified for Virys tenfold. As showcased by his fractured wrist and the fact he had to literally flee to his room. And it hadn’t taken long for Virys to associate it with Jaehaerys’ absence. This had been an especially rough year for Virys but after breaking his wrist in April, Jaehaerys had promised he would move back home. Only it was too little too late for Virys, and rather than feeling relieved to have his brother back, Virys had instead been using his brother as an outlet. Someone to pass all the blame to.

Presently Jaehaerys wasn’t even home, Virys did not know where he was but just the fact that he hadn’t tried to interject himself into the scuffle downstairs told Virys that he wasn’t here and that knowledge just further fueled his anger. What was the point of promising to move back home for him, if he wasn’t even going to be here when he needed him!?

Finally picking his Gatorade back up, Virys easily twisted the cap off as he moved to the far wall where the massive 300 gallon tank that housed his best friend was set up: Toothless, his bearded dragon. She did not rush over to the glass to greet him the way a dog would, but she did lift her head from sunbathing under her heat lamp and offered a long slow blink when he got close enough. Virys chugged a good portion of his drink right off the bat having just woken up within the hour and feeling his dehydration weighing him down. But after recapping the bottle he traded it for the small plastic enclosure bustling with live crickets and moved to the top of the terrarium to slide back the lid. This movement got Toothless’ attention and she was quick to climb down from her favorite rock in excited anticipation of food. He reached into the crickets with his bare hand, grabbing one and lowering his hand into Toothless’ home to hold it for her to take. Virys hand fed her a couple more like this, holding her wriggling prey still for her. But after a bit he instead dumped the rest of her daily portion in to let her hunt as she pleased.

Now that she was fed, it was time to take care of himself. He should have grabbed food while he was downstairs but it was too late now and Virys had no intentions of leaving his room after what just happened. But maybe he had some snacks around here somewhere—he took another long sip of his Gatorade on his way over to his bed.

But upon sitting on the edge, Virys did not even try to find snacks squirreled away in his bedside table. Instead he defaulted to routine and lit a blunt in hopes of slowing his mind back down to Earth’s speed and heavy gravitational pull. He would definitely be starving later, after all he had slept in till noon and hadn’t eaten anything since dinner last night. But for now he would survive on his yellow Gatorade and the creative juices that his high poured into his tortured soul.

Time was completely lost on Virys the longer he sat in his own personal cloud of smoke. His phone was still out but his AirPods had been abandoned amidst the mess of sheets after their battery percentage finally hit zero. He was listening intently to his Voice Memos, playing the same melodies and excerpts of lyrics over and over again as he tried so desperately hard to figure out what it was about the pieces of this song that left him feeling so unsatisfied. But just as an idea crossed his thoughts his eyes shot up at the distracting notification as Jaehaerys’ name appeared in bold in the banner at the top of his screen.

He immediately swiped the notification away without reading the preview and resumed smashing his thumbs against his phone’s keyboard as he tried to type out all his words into a Note before they could escape his memory. He had already been interrupted once when Saera called him earlier to wish him Happy Birthday, he couldn’t afford to be distracted twice and definitely not by Jaehaerys of all people.

It was too late though, the spell had been broken and the magic was gone. With a frustrated sigh he dropped his phone onto his bed beside him, lifting his head to gaze aimlessly out at his room. It looked very much like a child had been dumped in a chic, minimalistic, high end mini mansion. Which was exactly what had happened eight years ago when Virys first moved to Berkeley. By now there was a bit more of his own personal flair, mostly in the form of clothes and empty bottles and cans strewn about. He didn’t have any achievements or happy memories to put on display. He wasn’t invested in any fandom or bands enough to hang posters nor was he much of a collector to have anything like Legos or Funko Pop.

In fact, apart from Toothless, the only thing of personal importance to him was the guitar in the corner—now two guitars. He had been gifted a new one by his father for his birthday but Virys had yet to even open the case to look at it.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to, or wasn’t excited for it. Virys’ curiosity was dying to investigate his present, but he was also stubbornly upset with his father at the moment and it felt like he was the weaker of the two of them if he gave in and accepted the guitar. But as his eyes landed on the black case his fingers literally twitched at his sides wanting to wrap around the neck and strum the strings—oh but his left hand was still out of commission…except when had that ever stopped him from doing anything? Mind over matter: it wouldn’t hurt if he didn’t think it did.

But Virys’ mind was both his biggest strength and his biggest weakness. The amount of focus he could dedicate to one thing and his ability to block out distractions was incredible. But at the same time his mind played endless tricks on him. His mind lied to him and led him astray so frequently that he couldn’t even trust his own thoughts. Yet Virys also listened to those very thoughts despite any amount of rationale or reasoning for him not to. He consistently trusted his own untrustworthy mind over any and everyone else’s which was why he was currently staging a strike against his birthday gift despite Saera having spent a solid twenty minutes trying to convince him to stop overthinking it all and just enjoy his new guitar.

He needed to get out of here.

Virys picked his phone back up, his eyes heavy from the affects of how long he had been smoking—”Oh shit…”
One look at the time on his lock screen told him he had been sitting here for far longer than he had been aware of or had originally intended. Had his friends been trying to reach him at all? It had been a couple hours now since he had woken up, surely there were updates on their ETA to come take him out for his birthday.

Once his Face ID registered he was in fact himself, Virys opened up Instagram and went straight to his DMs. Yes he was ignoring all his notifications that flooded his account. He didn’t know most of the people who liked and commented on his posts, after all they were a result of his popularity and not of his friends. His DMs weren’t much different but it was at least easier to sort through and filter out—

Rytsas Virys!

He did a double take at the message he had clicked into. None of his friends knew High Valyrian, and the fact that this thread only had the one message told him he had opened the wrong one. This was not one of his friends…

But rather than exit back to find what he was looking for, Virys instead glanced up to the sender’s handle. Visaera. All at once his interest piqued in a way he wasn’t used to. It was like experiencing a new movie for the first time and being completely captivated. He could hear Visaera’s bright voice in his head as he continued on to read through her message, going back and forth whether her greeting had a pleasant ring to it from the smooth velvety Valyrian language or if it was obnoxious how his name undulated into a sad attempt at a rhyme.

It instantly dropped him back to the memory of sitting in their High Valyrian classroom when she walked in and the weird mixture of emotions that had rushed through him at the time. Honestly, Visaera had been one of the last people he expected to ever see again. It wasn't like they had parted on bad terms, but they had parted all the same with next to zero contact afterwards and they both flew in such completely different circles now. But seeing her again and standing face to face it almost felt as though no time had passed since he had last seen her. As disconnected as he felt from her, it also felt right to have her at his side again. It wasn’t like they were even that close before, but her sudden reintroduction to his life left him feeling as though…almost as though he had missed her.

It was a strange feeling, and one that ended up consuming his thoughts for the rest of the day, even after finally meeting up with his friends.

Hands ran through his hair, nails skimming his scalp in a soothing fashion before moving on to trail down his neck, over his shoulders and down underneath the front of his shirt. But even with Madi’s hands running against his bare chest, a subtle cry for intimacy, Virys did not falter. His lips still moved as he silently read through the lyrics in front of him, body unphased by her touch and mind far away lost in his own thoughts and memories.

“Hey Mads, can—can you sing something for me real quick?”
“You want me to sing?” He nodded, ”Like, your song?”
“Yeah…please?”

She moved from her place kneeling behind him on her bed so that she instead sat at his side. Virys passed her the receipt he’d been writing on with lyrics scribbled in his mismatched handwriting, his finger pointing to the lines he was requesting before swiping on his phone to open Voice Memos with the intention of recording Madi’s voice. His hopes and expectations were growing with every passing second as she read over the lyrics in silence, but this creative side of his was more similar to that of his angry one in that he was still impulsive and did not usually think things through. He was just riding on Madi breathing life into the words that had been stuck in his head like a mantra, and going into this with that mindset was just asking for failure.

”...Virys, what is this?”
He didn’t respond, glancing down to the piece of his soul she now held in her hand and then back at her, ”Okaaay…then how does it go?”
”Just sing.”
She stared back at him, a little taken aback by his response as though she was trying to figure out if he was being serious or if she was just missing something. But no, Virys was dead serious. He didn’t have a demo to play for her or even a melody to share—that was what he was trying to find right now by using her, ”...I seek you out...”

“...flay you alive…”

“...one more—”
”Stop.”

It wasn’t right. This wasn’t what played in his head over and over. But he couldn’t put his finger on what was wrong, or missing. All he knew was that it wasn’t right.

Madi’s fingers trailed over his forearm, almost as though knowing it was in her best interest to soothe him before he could escalate. Was he upset? She didn’t know. He didn’t even know. But she knew she didn’t want to find out, especially not on today of all days, ”Hey,” He had taken the receipt back and his eyes were locked on the words until she was able to pull his attention back to her, ”Do you still wanna dye your hair?”

They had planned this weeks ago. After he had expressed interest in coloring his hair—literally any color just so long as it was no longer Valyrian blonde—Madi had offered to do it for him. The cherry on top of her birthday present. So she had gone out and bought the hot pink dye at Sally’s and the plan was to color his hair, go meet up with their friends, and then probably come back for birthday sex. Although with Virys, even the best made plans were forever up in the air as there was no telling what might trigger a change of mind, ”Yeah.”

Even with gloves on to protect her nails from the dye, Madi’s hands through his hair still had a calming effect that had Virys melting into the chair they had brought into the bathroom. Whatever the darkness was that had taken him earlier over his song, it was gone. He was back to his default tranquility, the side of him that people were so quick to overlook as they solely associated him with violence. He really wasn’t like that though. He wasn’t an angry person and he wasn’t out looking for trouble. Virys was actually quite easy going and very thoughtful once you got to know him—it just seemed like there were so few now who could recognize that of him. It felt like the more his social bubble expanded the less people understood him. Whatever happened to when his friend group was just him and a select couple of individuals? Before Madi and the other girls he slept associated with now, there had only really been one girl in his life—besides his sisters—and life had felt so much easier back then.

His blue eyes were staring out at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. Madi had left him to run downstairs while his hair processed, but being left alone meant that he was at war with the voices in his head and it didn’t take long for that calm persona to unravel like a frayed sweater as his mind wandered back to images and memories he had stored far away with no intention of ever revisiting. Such as Visaera: the one girl from his past that he had gotten along with so seamlessly before his life became so chaotic.

At the time, three years ago, he hadn’t noticed they were drifting apart until it was too late. And even then he didn’t mourn their friendship. In fact it barely even crossed his mind. He wasn’t sad to lose her as a friend. He didn’t feel that he was above her at all in his new friend group. He didn’t look down on her at all. She had just become a stranger to him. A stranger that shared his image.

Seeing her enter the classroom, he had felt his heart stop in a similar way to one anticipating something. But what had he been expecting? For her to suddenly resume her place at his side like old times? It was pretty clear from how she had interacted with him as well that she wasn’t exactly interested in that. Virys had felt the new distance between them as they spoke. A weird combination of being comfortable with one another but unsure of where to safely draw the line. They were different people now, and Virys hadn’t had a problem with that until now as he watched his own reflection slowly morph until Visaera was smiling back at him in the mirror. That cute, cheerful smile of hers that could easily end world hunger if only people could survive on happiness alone.

Somewhere in his high enhanced calm, his heart skipped a beat, and it was that disruption to his daydreaming that made Visaera’s image in the mirror begin to distort. It was like watching paint run as all the colors that made her slid down the reflective glass. The last to go was the bright blonde of her hair and with it’s disappearance revealed his own hair that had begun to accept the dye and was visibly turning pink. That skipped beat returned, halting all thoughts and emotions for a half second before his heart began to race in a near panic.

Virys stood up so abruptly that the chair fell back, his hands—his one hand and the exposed fingers on the other, went straight to his hair and began running over and through it in an impulsive and desperate attempt to stop it from changing colors. The hair dye of course ended up all over his skin and looking back into the mirror it was clear that he had done nothing as far as removing the pink. The blonde was nearly gone and the image of Visaera in his mind along with it.

Most of the rest of his birthday was a blur to him. Madi had returned after hearing all the commotion and she ended up assisting in shampooing out as much of the dye as they could. They managed to get it to a soft pastel pink which was the best they could do without bleaching it back to normal, and Madi assured him several times that it would continue to fade with every shower. They met up with their friends afterwards to celebrate his birthday—aka an excuse to go smoke and drink and stay out all night. Virys woke up the next day back in Madi’s bed with their clothes abandoned on the floor and only a few blurry memories to go off of. With the clearest being a haunting reminder that he was to meet with Visaera the next day.

And that reminder ended up following him all day long.

Part of him was absolutely dreading it. He didn’t want to sit and practice his mother tongue. He didn’t need to! He spoke it well enough already, after all he was raised speaking it. But his grades and Mr.Luwin would say otherwise. Apparently native fluency and textbook fluency were two very different things.

But another part of him was curious—intrigued by Visaera’s reappearance in his life. And it was that part of him that had him entering the library on Wednesday.

He was late, of course. Not terribly so, but he had lost track of time on his way here in his smoke cloud and thoughts. Plus he had stopped at Starbucks.

Pausing in the entryway to the large study area, Virys’ height gave him the advantage when it came to surveying the room in search of Visaera. Though his height combined with her lack of actually made locating her fairly difficult initially. He had such a large scope of the room that it was almost like having too much information and being unable to narrow it down. And then with her being so small it was easy for her to be hidden from view—even if by accident. But once Virys did catch sight of her, she was suddenly all he could focus on and he mentally kicked himself for not noticing her sooner. How did he not see her right away? That blonde hair that had haunted him on his birthday—their birthday.

Her DM remained opened and left on read. Not entirely intentional on Virys’ part. It was more so one of those “replied in his head but didn’t actually send anything” moments. And then coupled with how loud it usually was in his head…her birthday wishes had quickly plummeted on his priorities. But they hadn’t gone forgotten and Virys’ fingers fiddled with the little white paper pastry bag in his left hand as he approached the table she sat at.

It didn’t seem like she had noticed he was here yet, ”Hey—” Immediately someone at a nearby table aggressively shushed him, but Virys turned his head towards them so fast and the look he shot would make them think twice about doing that again “You shh,” It was a very childlike reaction, immature for someone who had just entered the early stages of adulthood. But one look at Virys made it abundantly clear he meant it in a bit more of a threatening sense than just being a brat as a child would have.

“I’m not even talking that loud,” He wasn’t exactly talking to anyone directly, more so complaining to himself. The hoarseness to his voice did little to mask the hostility, but as he turned to face Visaera his expression softened almost immediately and his whole demeanor visibly settled down, “Hey, sorry I’m late,” His voice even dropped, though it arguably was still above traditional library level, ”I uhh…actually I only came to tell you that I’m not gonna do this tutoring thing,” Virys’ right hand pulled at the neckline of his hoodie in such a way that could almost be classified as a nervous tick, ”I just didn’t want to leave you sitting here waiting and uhh…”

“Yeah…sorry. This is for you though...happy birthday.”
The pink cast extended—the white interior now tinged pink from his hair dye episode—holding out the white Starbucks bag with the pink birthday cake pop that he had stopped to get on his way here. ​

 

[feelsHASkilig]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VISAERA CELTIGAR ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 061522 tab ❖ LOCATION — diner tab ❖ COMPANY — virys
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

It was the million dollar question on Visaera’s mind: Will Virys show up? As she walked up to the library entrance, she couldn’t help worrying that he wouldn’t. After all, her birthday message to him was still on Seen a couple days after she sent it. If that’s not an indication that Virys Targaryen was not interested in any association with her—whether as a reunited friend or simply as his tutor—then she had no idea what would.

Still, she rode her bike all the way to their agreed meeting spot at the off chance and sliver of hope that he would show.

As Visaera made camp at an empty table, she glanced down at the time on her phone. She was ten minutes early for the tutoring session. This was fine. It offered her the chance to give her lesson plan a final review before Virys hopefully arrived. Of course, that reasoning didn’t stop her from looking up from her laptop to glance around the floor just in case he too showed up early.

He didn’t, of course. She saw no glimpse of his bright blonde hair among the dark neutrals of the library.

Wait, no, he wasn’t blonde anymore….

As her Macbook started up and loaded the home screen, Visaera skimmed over her phone until her overall curiosity brought her back to Instagram. Just like the last two days, there was only one message in the DM thread between her and Virys: hers. But she expected this after having seen and been disappointed that there were no new notifications on Instagram outside of the continuous likes her new post was collecting. She ignored these notifications for the time being and instead tapped on Virys’ profile picture to load his page.

Unlike her, there was no birthday post on Virys’ page. He had, however, apparently posted on his birthday through his Stories, but her overall anxiety at the prospect of him knowing that she watched it overpowered that day’s curiosity. But that act of cowardice left her with an ache to know what he did on their special day. It could almost be considered FOMO without actually knowing what she feared missing out on.

That FOMO-esque feeling didn’t last long though. And now, two days later, Visaera didn’t know why she insisted on continuing with the torture. Yes, torture. Because while she resisted watching his Insta-stories from his birthday, she did get a glimpse of his activities through tagged photos from the friends he did spend it with. More specifically, she found out how he spent his birthday through a girl named Madi. If it weren’t for the things she heard about Virys in connection to his history with relationships, she would have suspected this Madi girl to be his girlfriend. Which, despite knowing that couldn’t be true, made her stomach twist sickeningly deep in her gut.

The corners of her lips turned down as she stared at the first photo from the birthday dedication post on Madi’s page. It was a blurry photo, but it was obvious that it was taken the night of Virys’ birthday. Although there was a lot going on in that one photo, her bright blue eyes couldn’t turn away from the matching blue eyes looking right back. Yes, she was aware that they weren’t actually looking back at her, but that was the thing about Virys. His gaze, whether or not he was looking at you, was just so piercing. She stared into his hooded gaze. It was similar to how they looked when they first reunited, but even she knew that he was probably under the influence in some way.

Then her gaze lifted to another part of him and her frown deepened. Visaera recalled the first time she noticed the change. How her heart stopped for a split second then felt like it was being crushed in a tight fist. She remembered the disappointment that consumed her as she looked upon the pink hair that replaced the silvery locks she had been imagining throughout her entire birthday. Now, days later, she could feel that disappointment still lingering in her chest looking at the soft pink strands. Would this pain feel worse when/if she saw it in person? Did she even have the right to feel that way? After all, they weren’t friends. She definitely had no right to have an opinion on the decisions he made—

"Hey." Visaera’s heart just about jumped right out of her chest. Eyes wide, she panic swiped out of Instagram before looking up to the source of the greeting. Only, Virys wasn’t looking at her. Instead he appeared to be glaring daggers at another table. When she turned in the direction he was looking at, she barely caught the culprit in the process of looking back down at whatever book was on the desk. She definitely missed something, but decided against asking what that was as she turned back around to look up at Virys. At that very same moment, he looked down at her and…she felt…odd.

First, she was right. Her disappointment reared up inside her chest as she took in his soft pink hair. Don’t get her wrong, he pulled it off well despite his hard exterior. But as someone that initially befriended him because of the Valyrian blonde hair, she stubbornly could not accept that he would do something to cover it. His blonde hair was one of the things about him that kept her looking at and for him these past three years; even though their friendship had ended long ago. Even if nothing came out of catching sight of him in the halls at school, just seeing his silvery blonde hair bouncing above the sea of passing students was enough. Now— Visaera bit the inside of her cheek to stop the frown from appearing.

But if she thought she was done being disappointed, she was greatly mistaken.

Her chest tightened listening to him. Of course she expected this. As hopeful as she was about their summer tutoring, she also knew that this was Virys Targaryen. She heard enough to know that not even she could convince him to commit to tutoring if he couldn’t even bother going to class.

Or…maybe she could? Convince him, that is.

As she stared down at his outstretched hand, she couldn’t fight back her frown any longer. When did he get the cast? She hadn’t noticed it last week when they spoke briefly outside Mister Luwin’s classroom. Then again, if she remembered correctly, he was wearing either the same hoodie or one similar to the one he was wearing now. So the sleeve must have covered it at the time. Now, however, there was no ignoring it. A part of her wanted to ask what happened, but a voice in the back of her mind pulled her back. It reminded her rather tauntingly that she had no right to ask. She wasn’t his friend anymore. And thus, it was none of her damn business.

“Um…” Well, that felt pathetic. For someone that was well known for being articulate, words were escaping her as she stared into those diamond eyes. Okay, maybe her ability to word wasn’t entirely gone. After all, her mind was reeling with ways to describe his striking blue eyes. Comparing them to diamonds was one. In fact, it was his eyes that gave her the strength to look away from the cast and what looked like his form of a birthday gift.

Still, she had to say something.

After taking a deep breath, Visaera reached for the white pastry bag and offered Virys a bright smile. “Thank you. This is so sweet.” She opened the bag, her smile widening at the sight of the pink cake pop. “I’m sorry I didn’t get you anything….”

There was silence between them as they both struggled to find anything else to say. But this silence only lasted seconds before Virys announced that he was going to leave. After all, he came all this way to let her know that he wasn’t staying nor did he have any intention of coming back.

Then again…he did come all this way instead of…say…letting her know in a reply to her message on Instagram.

“Hey, Virys. Wait!” While she hadn’t exactly raised her voice too much, her outburst still earned her a few shushes and pointed stares. But that hardly bothered her as she reached a hand out to Virys’ arm to stop him. Even though he took only a few steps away from her, she still needed to jog to catch up to him.

There was an instant surge of warmth that trailed from the dark fabric of Virys’ hoodie to her fingertips. It sucked the breath out of her lungs momentarily and she couldn’t help staring at where they were connected. A part of her was tempted to tighten her grip on his arm, wondering if that sudden surge would strengthen. But while this came as such a shock to Visaera, it also felt strangely…familiar? No, that wasn’t it. Of course, it wasn’t like they hadn’t touched each other when they were friends. Only, she definitely did not recall ever feeling this kind of warmth just from touching his arm. But there was nothing foreign about the feeling. It didn’t confuse her nor did it scare her. All she could think was how much she wanted more of it.

She eventually released his arm when she finally looked up at his expecting gaze. “Sorry…” Her cheeks flushed, but she fought to keep eye contact. If there was one thing she knew, she was not going to be very convincing if she didn’t hold his attention.

“Listen, um, I appreciate that you gave me a head’s up about tutoring. It definitely did cross my mind that you might not show at all and, well…” Her hand reached for the rose pendant around her neck, fiddling with the golden petals to gather some form of courage. “Since we haven’t talked in years, I understand if you feel like you don’t owe me any kind of commitment to this. So, again, I do appreciate that you came all this way to let me know. And for the cake pop, of course!” The quick addition of her repeated gratitude for his “birthday gift” earned her another round of shushes. Again, she ignored them all.

“But,” she continued, dropping her hand to once more focus solely on keeping eye contact with Virys, “you also did come all this way. You could have easily just let me know on, like, Insta or something. I definitely gave you the chance to.” She let out a small, nervous laugh as she pushed her hair back.

By now, Virys was not only looking at her expectantly, but with a subtle hint of impatience. She definitely needed to wrap this up quickly before she lost him.

“So, I was thinking, why not just do this one session today? It’s not gonna take long, I promise. And, if Mister Luwin asks about it next week, at least you can tell him you did attend this week. And it won’t be a lie.” She once more offered him a bright smile in an attempt to bring this home. “Please?”

Visaera led the way back to their table with the biggest smile on her face. She tried to hide her excitement when Virys took his seat across from her, but as their eyes met once again, her smile only etched itself deeper onto her face. While on the outside she tried to keep her appearance as calm and collected as possible, inside she was a fit of excitement. She couldn’t believe she managed to convince him to stay after all—even if it was just for one tutoring session.

“Well, like I said,” she started, sliding her finger across the trackpad to wake up her Macbook, “this won’t take too long. I thought that it would be a good use of our time if we spent this week, or just today I guess, fine tuning what exactly you need help on with High Valyrian. Luwin told me that you’re a native speaker, so I wanted to make sure I wasn’t about to waste your time with concepts you already know.” As she spoke, her fingers flew across her keyboard as she pulled up a Google Forms page.

Once the Forms page was fully loaded, Visaera turned the laptop around so the screen faced Virys. His facial response alone told her everything she needed to know: he was neither impressed nor thrilled to be taking a proficiency test right now. “I promise it’s not even that long! I mostly pulled questions from your final exam and tweaked some of the statements. A couple are of my own creation, but I did have Luwin look it over to make sure that they were correct. Not that I had any doubts.” She giggled at her quick moment of self-confidence.

This was the sole reason why she decided they should meet at the library today for tutoring. Of course she knew that teaching a foreign language in a library was not ideal, but she figured that a quiet environment would help him concentrate better on the proficiency test than, say, a bustling coffee shop.

Visaera tried her best not to stare the entire time Virys was taking the test. When she wasn’t trying to distract herself with her phone, she stared at the white Starbucks pastry bag now folded beside her purse. If it weren’t for the fact that eating food wasn’t allowed inside the library, she would have enjoyed the treat while she waited. But even his kind gesture was not enough to hold her attention and before she knew it, she was staring at whatever part of Virys that caught her attention first. Sometimes it was his cotton candy pink hair—all the while pushing back the disappointment that still clung to her heart whenever she looked at it. Once or twice she looked at his cast, again wondering what caused it. There were a few theories that felt like they could be a possibility, but she didn’t feel confident enough to ask considering her only merit was all the rumors she heard about his past violent incidents.

The longest she ever looked at him though was when she watched his mouth. His thin lips quietly mouthed along with whatever statement he was reading and there was just something about it that looked so…enticing. But, wait, no. His lips weren’t as thin as she thought she remembered them to be. She also caught herself wondering if they had always looked so soft in person. Then, when her mind moved into memory territory, she zoned in those memories on those lips. Like their first lunch together during their first day of freshman year. She couldn’t exactly remember what they were talking about, but he was on some subject that involved tugboats. Amusement pulled at her lips realizing that his way of saying tugboat was honestly quite cute—back then at least. Would it still look and sound cute three years later? Now that his voice was lower and hoarse from years of smoking and drugs. In fact, would he even be caught saying “tugboat” in public?

“Here.” Just like earlier, she internally jumped in a panic at his sudden attention on her. Her heart raced, cheeks flushed once again as if caught doing something she shouldn’t. Between staring at an Instagram post he was tagged in and watching his lips silently mouth High Valyrian, it did kind of feel that way.

“Oh, great, thanks. Um,” Visaera pulled her laptop back to her then turned it to see the screen. “I can take a look at your answers now. It won’t take me long. Unless you’d rather I look at it later and just, like, message you my notes?” It didn’t surprise her when he mentioned that he didn’t care. But she also picked up in his tone that he was ready to leave.

“Okay, well, um…I guess I can look at it later. Which means we’re done for today.”

Much to her surprise, Virys waited while she packed up her things. She half expected him to be out the door long before she even mentioned that they were done for today. However, the surprises only continued when he kept in stride with her the whole way to the exit and then as they walked over to where she parked her bike.

After stuffing her bag in the basket hanging across her bike handles, she was about to say her goodbyes to Virys when he beat her to the punch. Hearing him say goodbye dampened any and all excitement she felt just a moment ago. Why did the thought of him walking away now seem so upsetting? It wasn’t like he wanted to be at this tutoring session in the first place. But…maybe he didn’t mind it too much if he went through the effort of walking her to her bike.

Visaera struggled to push back the possibility that maybe, just maybe, he felt similar to her and was not ready to part ways. Even if he was the one that initiated goodbyes first.

In truth, Visaera wasn’t ready to watch his back walk away from her. There was no more three years later for them. If Virys walked away now, she just knew that she would never see him again. With just one more year of high school left for them, they were destined to once more be strangers passing in the hallways. And that was when Visaera knew she didn’t want that.

Even if she wasn’t going to get him back as a friend, she wanted to at least hope that if he saw her at school, he would acknowledge her. Hell, she would even take just having him look at her at school if that was all he was willing to give her.

“Virys!” she called out, stopping him mid-sentence. Once again, she held his gaze despite the storm brewing inside her from his intense gaze. His eyes really were so piercing.

“Um, you don’t, like, have any plans now, right?” He confirmed that he didn’t, or at least that was how she interpreted his shrug of a response. “Do you want to have lunch? Like old times?” It took all of her might to not kick herself for saying something like that. As if he cared much about their one month’s worth of lunches together—even if she apparently did. “What about walking over to the diner down the street? My treat, of course!”

There was silence between them once again as they walked toward the diner. Visaera’s efforts to think of topics for them to discuss were unsuccessful. As they were such different people now compared to three years ago, she struggled to find a way to connect with him. Everything about his life was either too intimidating to ask about…or honestly too personal. It’s not like she could ask him about his smoking and drug habit…no matter how curious she was about how it started. So what exactly could she talk about? The weather? Lame. Lame. Lame. Lame. La—

Virys again broke the silence. But this time, it was in the form of a question that he must have been thinking over. He asked about her relationship with High Valyrian. But she picked up that he was asking more than just her level of fluency.

Visaera mulled this question over for a short distance, but she eventually got her answer after they crossed the street.

“You’re fluent yourself, right? Like, you’re able to hold a conversation and all that?” Virys simply nodded.

Visaera smiled up at him. How was it that despite having been friends for a few months three years ago, it never occurred to them that they could bond over their mother language? Well, maybe this could be her chance at a do over…even if, again, it doesn’t result in friendship.

“I have spoken High Valyrian all my life,” she started, her voice soft but also heavy with emotions. “My mother spoke it exclusively to me when I was a baby. And, you have to keep in mind, my mother has no Valyrian blood in her. I’m Valyrian on my father’s side. She learned the language when she was around our age because she loved it and she wanted to pass that love on to me. And I’m glad she did.” Visaera stopped so that a woman walking her dog could pass them without getting tangled in her bike.

“It is a beautiful language. It exudes such power and authority. Like, you can take on the world or something! The strength of each word demands attention.” The diner was fast approaching now and Visaera surveyed the exterior for a spot to park her bike. Even though she was no longer looking at Virys, she continued. “I also hold a lot of pride being fluent. I don’t know if you are aware of this, but my father’s family is mostly just Valyrian by name only. Almost all of my relatives have no interest in knowing their own mother tongue. They don’t see how it could benefit them. All they care about is the Celtigar name and what it can do for our family.”

When they stepped into the diner, Visaera broke back into English to inform a passing waiter that needed a table for two. Since it was after lunch, the diner was not too busy. There were some tables with people dressed in suits, but for the most part, many tables were empty. So they were seated fairly quickly.

As Virys slid into his seat across from her, Visaera once more just quietly watched him. Something about them sitting together for lunch with a table between them felt so familiar, even after all these years. Not exactly in the nostalgic sense, but more so that despite their natural falling out, they could sit together like this and it wouldn’t feel awkward. Well, that was how she felt. She wondered if he felt the same. Actually, she hoped he felt the same.

After skimming over the menu a couple times, Visaera looked back at Virys. They didn’t make eye contact this time because he was so focused on his menu.

Regardless of whether or not she had his attention, she had to say what has been eating at her since he first told her he didn’t want to move forward with tutoring. “I hope I’m not overstepping or something, but I hope you reconsider your decision to not continue with tutoring. I’m…honestly kind of excited about this? Not just because I’m getting tutoring hours and all that. But, like, I think it would be so fun revisiting a language we know so well in the scope of an academic lens. Learn why some words are the way they are instead of just knowing that they are what they are because we were simply told so.” ​

 

[JINFINITE]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VIRYS TARGARYEN ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 061722 tab ❖ LOCATION — berkeley public library - central branch tab ❖ COMPANY — visaera
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

“Oh…yeah I get that,” Virys wasn't blind to the disappointment that crossed her face when he responded in English, he was used to it—disappointing people that is. And then combined with his complete lack of enthusiasm on the subject of High Valyrian and their families, it was pretty clear he had no interest in taking that conversation any deeper.

While Visaera was very devoted to their heritage beyond just the language, though he did agree it sounded beautiful—when she spoke it at least, Virys on the other hand wanted nothing to do with it. Or at least that’s how he felt lately. There were a thousand things worse than sitting in class or tutoring for Valyrian. Such as breaking his arm, getting arrested, crashing his car, losing Toothless—the list went on and on—but right now Virys would choose any of those things over strengthening his connection with his culture.

He could understand where Visaera came from in wanting to learn the language and keep it alive in her family, and he could respect that. Hell if it weren’t for his own situation he might very well feel the same way. But as it was his family was just pushing him further and further from the language and from essentially accepting who he was. He was a Targaryen. His family was extremely well documented back for generation upon generation. In fact he probably would have been raised as royalty had their family not left Valyria all those years ago.

And even if he didn’t acknowledge it, he knew her family well, or knew of them at least. Because while he himself had little to no interest in Valyria, that didn’t stop seemingly everyone in his life from force feeding him knowledge as though he were some prince expected to one day take over and rule a kingdom. He distinctly remembered his brothers’ comments the one time Visaera had been brought up all those years ago, and they didn’t exactly have anything nice to say on the matter. He knew better than to make known what was important to him so at the time he hid their friendship and made a point to never mention her again, but it seemed as though he had swept her so far under the rug that they drifted apart to the point of existing on two different planes. Visaera was thriving. She was clearly excelling in school and there was no doubt that she had her entire future figured out with a ten year plan. While Virys on the other hand was suffering. He regularly poisoned his body with drugs and alcohol and barely knew what he would do the next day let alone years from now! And throughout their lunch he couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened had they remained friends. Would he have ended up more like her and be graduating with a 4.0 and have schools literally begging for his attendance? Or would she have dropped down to his level and spent her evenings locked out of the house and smoking with him by the marina watching the horizon swallow the sun?

Regardless of what would have or could have been, right now here in this moment it just felt right sitting together in the diner. Despite the obvious differences between them, it didn’t actually feel as though there were any. And for the first time in a long time Virys actually felt at peace. His opinion on tutoring hadn’t changed, and he still had no intentions of continuing this beyond today. But the longer they sat at their table the more he relaxed and his entire demeanor visibly shifted from his earlier annoyances in the library. In fact, by the time it was time to leave…Virys didn’t want to.

He didn’t want this to end because that would mean he would return back to his miserable existence at home and hide out in his room for hours at a time wasting his days away. Sitting with Visaera had granted him a freedom he hadn’t felt in years. With her he didn’t feel weighed down by expectations, or harshly judged for his decisions. He wouldn’t quite define it as feeling happy, but it felt like he could finally take a breath and not have to hold it for fear that he would never get a second one. He wasn’t on edge that something would be taken from him. Or that someone would harm him for reasons outside of his control.

His time here with Visaera had felt safe.

Virys had thought he knew safety. He had thought he had experienced that with his older sister Saera when she lived at home. Or with Madi whenever he escaped to her house. But after this last hour with Visaera he knew that those experiences paled in comparison to what it felt like to be with her. He could practically feel his heart reaching out to blindly grasp at her, desperate to hold onto the first good feeling he’d had in a long time—and then he really reached out and his hand dwarfed her’s as he swiped the check out from her fingertips.

“I got it. “

Visaera of course protested. Her reasoning rambled from her wanting to thank him for staying for their one tutoring session to using this as a birthday gift for him since he had gotten her the cake pop and she had shown up empty handed. But Virys remained strong against her and after his gaze hardened in a quick warning she finally backed off and let him pay for the entirety of their meal. Not that he was even using his own money.

Ultimately it was likely that moment that allowed for them to part ways. Visaera did not try to ask him to stay back again and his heart had returned to its mundane existence in his chest, not allowing for himself to hold onto any hopes because experience had long taught him that they all led to disappointment. But by the time he was back behind the wheel of his Mustang, Virys could feel a heaviness pinning him down against the leather seats and he just sat in his parking spot dreading the rest of his life.

And that feeling stuck with him and festered in the pit of his stomach for the rest of the day. It was almost like a regret. Like he had missed out on a golden opportunity by turning down Visaera’s tutoring. At the time he had wanted nothing to do with it, but once back in his room with the door locked for his own protection, Virys couldn’t help but wish he was back in the diner listening to Visaera’s sweet voice.

His window was cracked open, the only escape for the smoke that had filled his room, and Virys sat on the floor leaning against the window sill because as deeply as he needed this high, he also needed the fresh air and oxygen of the outside world that he was cut off from here in his tower of a bedroom.

Virys’ right hand held his phone, the screen open to Instagram, while his left rested off to the side with what remained of a joint semi forgotten between his cast encased fingers. As he scrolled down Visaera’s page his mind was a muddled mess of memories. He thought back to earlier that day, he thought back to their time together during freshman year, and he tried to envision what her life must have been like during all the years in between as he watched her smile back at him in all of her photos.

It looked like she had a good life—a happy life. And surely that must have been because he hadn’t been part of it.

Virys’ mind was lost in his thoughts and slow to react when his screen covered Visaera’s latest post to show that he had an incoming call. He should have checked the caller id. Had he known who was calling he probably wouldn’t have answered, but instead his thumb moved out autopilot and swiped across to answer the call.

Only he didn’t say anything after raising his phone to his ear. There was a long moment of silence before a deep male voice said his name on the other line. Virys’ gaze rose to stare defiantly into the nothingness across the room at the recognition of his father’s voice.

”Virys?” He tried again and Virys inhaled sharply in response, fighting the urge to immediately hang up on the man as his grip on his phone tightened. There was a poison that bubbled in his blood whenever it came to his family and he could feel it pulsing through his body and entering his heart with every racing beat as he waited for his father to continue on. It was a toss up what would happen next. There was a 50/50 chance this would feed Virys’ seething rage and set him off, but the other 50% would be the familial connection he so badly craved, and it was that desperation that kept him from ending the call and he waited with bated breath to hear what it was his father had called about.

”How are you?”
Virys didn’t even try to cover his scoff or eye roll as he released the tense breath he’d been holding, ”I’m fine.”
The Valyrian came out so icy smooth and without any hesitation after having repressed it all afternoon with Visaera. And this was precisely why he had withheld his mother tongue despite being so comfortable with it. Because the language tied him back to this family and his fucking father who ultimately was to blame for every pain he had experienced in his eighteen years of life.

There was another pause as his father contemplated whether to pursue a real conversation or call it quits before his youngest started spitting venom through the phone. Virys in the meantime occupied himself with a drag of his joint in an attempt to calm his nerves.

”Did you get the gift I sent?” At the mention of it, Virys’ eyes trailed over to the black guitar case in the corner. It still remained untouched since its arrival the day before his and Visaera’s birthday despite both Saera and Jaehaerys trying to convince him to at least open it.

”…yeah—” His voice cracked slightly as the smoke tickled a cough from deep in his lungs, but Virys’ attention and curiosity had locked onto the gift. He stubbed out what was left of his joint before stumbling to his feet, his poisoned blood simultaneously working to fill both his legs and his brain and leaving him weak and dizzy for a moment from the rush, ”Did you open it?”

For someone who understood absolutely nothing about him, it was infuriating how well his father knew him. Virys didn’t respond; he couldn’t, his left hand was at his mouth and his fingertip tracing nervously along his lower lip. The cast hindered his movements and kept it from feeling natural, but that didn’t bother him while trapped in the slight trance he had fallen into.

”I asked your brother,” He had to be referring to Jaehaerys, ”And he said you hadn’t replaced yours yet,” Virys’ fingernail had slipped between his teeth by now, his father was sending his anxiety into a downward spiral as the flashbacks played in his head: memories of weeks back when both his wrist and his guitar got snapped at the hands of his terror of a brother Daeron.

Virys didn’t have anything kind to say in response, or rather he quite simply couldn’t find anything to say. He quietly just took out his emotions on his nails while his father continued his attempt at reconnecting, completely unaware that Virys was dissociating too hard to even hear him.

Technically his father had nothing to do with Daeron assaulting him, but that didn’t stop Virys from blaming him. Virys had always blamed him and they had been through this same routine countless times before. Something would happen, Virys would lash out, his father would try to fix it…usually with money or gifts, Virys would give in and then either get even more upset or finally be able to hold a healthy relationship for a few weeks to a couple months until the next thing set him off.

In between murdering his nails he had finally kneeled down in front of the guitar case and had just unsnapped the latches and pulled the lid open in time to hear his father offer for him to come move back to LA for the summer—”Fuck you.”

Virys hung up so fast and let his phone clatter to the floor, all the while his eyes were transfixed on his father’s gift. It was a stunning guitar, black with a pink chrome finish. But what truly had him mesmerized was his faint reflection he could catch in the light at the right angle, and in that image of himself he found Visaera’s bright smile shining back at him.

That was the second time now he had seen her when looking at himself, and it wouldn’t be the last.

The next two nights he barely slept. Maybe it was because of his father. Or maybe it was all the weed fueling his overactive mind. Whatever it was it kept him restless, irritable and holed up in his room for all of Thursday and into Friday morning. He had completely blown off his friends’ attempts to coax him out to hang out, including Maddie’s offer to come stay with him.

In the beginning it was very confusing for him, being unable to pinpoint just why he was suddenly so upset—especially after having actually had an enjoyable afternoon with Visaera. But eventually he was able to recognize that maybe that was exactly why he was suddenly struggling to live with himself. He had already figured out how different he had felt in her presence…and so being at home in this toxic chaos after being exposed to her left him on edge. But it truly hit him hard when she had messaged him the day after their tutoring session. He had felt his heart skip a beat seeing her notification pop up on his phone and the excitement he felt was similar to that of a child rushing into the living room Christmas morning eager to see what Santa had left for them.

Virys had only responded to her twice before he was pulled back to reality and too distracted to return to the little sanctuary that was their message thread.

Friday morning rolled in Virys found himself still awake when his phone alerted him to a message, but seeing Visaera’s name again gave him a break in his brain fog long enough to realize what that meant.

Today was supposed to be the next day of their tutoring.

But Virys had told her no. He had told her he wouldn’t go through with it. He had opted out and the regret crashed into him ten times stronger than it had Wednesday on his drive home after their lunch. His stomach was churning in on itself as the nausea from lack of sleep kicked in, but that was nothing that a little weed couldn’t mask. Virys knew how to get through his days even when he didn’t feel up to it. It was just a matter of if he wanted to try. Did he want to put in the effort? To leave and go to her…

How many times before in life had he gone to others only to be left behind and abandoned? How many people had turned their backs on him even after saying they would be there for him?

But Virys stared at his phone until the screen turned black as it locked itself into sleep mode. And as Visaera’s message disappeared from view it was replaced with her image yet again in his reflection. How could someone as pure and perfect as her look so similar to one as damned and damaged as he was?

He should have responded to her. He should have told her he was on his way. But Virys’ mind and body were locked in a panic and the only relief they knew was to reach Visaera as quickly as possible. Last time they were together he had felt safe. And the only thing running through his head as he threw on his hoodie and fumbled around for his keys was how desperate he was to feel that again after having locked himself away in his room for a whole day and a half.

Even though she had told him where she would be, Virys was still surprised to see her all set up in the library at the very same table they were at on Wednesday. But as she caught sight of him and that bright smile lit up the room, he could physically feel his world expanding to include her in the little bubble he had lived in by himself seemingly all his life.

As he made his way over to the table, the tiniest of smiles infiltrated the very corner of his mouth at seeing how excited she was to see him. She even remarked on how glad she was that he came but as Virys pulled out the chair to sit across from her, the only nonsense that fell from his mouth was ”Yeah I…yeah…“

Translation: he had no explanation for his change of mind. At least not one that made sense to him. He didn’t care about the tutoring—neither her hours nor his grade. He had just wanted to see her again and despite being able to talk his way both into and out of many scenarios, now that he was face to face with Visaera he found himself at a loss for words.

He’d never had trouble talking to girls before. Not to say that he was nervous in front of her now, but he did feel…different, and he really couldn’t put his finger on why that was.

Even though the fog had lifted, Virys was still slow to react with his body begging for food and sleep. So as Visaera spoke and turned her laptop towards him, Virys just watched on with a glazed daze to his eyes. He wasn’t processing anything she was saying. Was it from sleep deprivation? Or was he too high? No…well, yes probably, but no. Virys was rather quick to piece together that a large part of the problem was that despite his current hyperfixation on Visaera’s voice, he couldn’t hear her with her hushed library voice.

This wasn’t working.
He couldn’t do this.

“—you wanna get out of here?” ​

​

 

[feelsHASkilig]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VISAERA CELTIGAR ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 062122 tab ❖ LOCATION — outside mister luwin's classroom tab ❖ COMPANY — virys
▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃
tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

As Visaera stared at her lock screen wallpaper, a frown pulled at the corners of her lips. Disappointment blurred the image of her and Deric’s smiling faces staring back at her—taken during her surprise trip to visit him at Yale. For the first time since she changed her wallpaper to this current photo of her and Deric from a previous photo of the two of them, the happy memories behind the captured moment didn’t immediately rush into her mind. Instead, she pictured pink tinted platinum blonde hair and striking blue eyes gazing back at her. With a deep sigh, she turned her phone screen down and went back to staring at the gentle ripples traveling across her pool.

It had been officially 24 hours since Virys last sent her a text response—an actual text response. Not a DM over Instagram. The gamble she made giving him her number after their time together at the diner had actually paid off. At least until this very moment.

She really thought she was making progress getting through to him. Sure, she was partially deluding herself thinking that progress was being made after she received two text messages from him the day before. But there was no denying that something was happening between the two of them. They had a good time together at the diner. Surely that had to mean something to him as much as it definitely did to her. Surely that meant that there was some kind of hope that they could continue where they left off three years ago. It just all felt full circle: ending their friendship with one lunch only to renew it with another.

“What in the world did Deric Tyrell do to get that look on your face?”

Visaera blinked then looked over her sunglasses at Macy. Truth be told, she completely forgot that her best friend was with her. “What?”

Unlike Visaera, who was wearing a two piece bikini, Macy Arryn was forced into a one piece suit, a wide brimmed hat and strong SPF sunscreen. An unfortunate Arryn family trait, the ability to burn so easily. Macy removed her own sunglasses, resting them across her stomach. “You’ve been looking at your phone, like, every few minutes as if you’re waiting for something. Are you waiting on a text from Deric? Or is he, like, hella busy with whatever Yale shit that forced him back there after your birthday party?”

Visaera silently blinked once more at Macy. Her mind went momentarily blank wondering where all of this was coming from. What did Deric have to do with her looking at her phone? But at the sudden thought of her other best friend currently on the other side of the country, she reached up to touch the golden rose hanging around her neck.

It was a second blink later that her mind finally caught up with her. Of course Macy was asking about Deric. Deric was the only thing she knew about. Because while she did normally tell Macy practically everything, Visaera has yet to tell her about her tutoring with Virys Targaryen. After all, try as she might to be optimistic, she still acknowledges that he had made it pretty clear he had no interest in coming to their next tutoring session that Friday. Or the remaining sessions for the rest of summer school. So…was there even a point in bringing it up? Maybe. But Visaera felt too on edge in the midst of her hopefulness to risk the possibility of jinxing anything.

“Um…” Visaera glanced at her turned down phone, flexing her fingers to stop herself from picking it up again. “No, I’m not messaging Deric right now. Not that he’s, like, busy or anything. I mean, yes he is. You know he’s finishing up with moving into his new apartment and all that, but we know he’s pretty prompt when I text him.” She was rambling. She could feel it in the awkward tickle in her throat that she was spilling words that she didn’t entirely feel committed to. But the silence between her and her best friend was growing palpable and she needed to fill the void before it made her more nervous.

“So…then, who are you texting?” Macy paused though her lifted brows indicated her ever growing impatience.

Visaera simply shook her head and reassured the girl that it was nothing important. “Just trying to figure out if my plans tomorrow are going to follow through or not.” It wouldn’t resolve the obvious curiosity Macy still harbored over the mystery of it all, but if Visaera hid behind a mask of nonchalance, they could at least move on from this. Especially as the incessant need to look at her phone again itched at the back of her mind. She could have sworn she heard her text ringtone go off.

In the end, despite constantly checking her phone for any new text notification, Visaera was once again left on Read. By Friday morning, she was restless. Her mind reeled contemplating if she should try messaging him again. Maybe he had just been busy the last couple days and completely forgot to text her back. After all, she still didn’t know much about his life. One lunch was not going to reconnect three long years apart. She had no right to assume he would give her much time of day after being forced to spend time with her for one.

However, despite the nervous twist and turns in the pit of her stomach, Visaera felt that she shouldn’t give up on this—on him. And as she walked about her room picking out her outfit for the day, she composed a quick text to Virys stating that she was heading to the library at their agreed upon time and she hoped to see him there. Simple enough message despite all her hopes and anxieties entangled in every single word. Why was she so nervous anyway???

The first signs of disappointment started to show itself when she stepped foot into the library and couldn’t find Virys anywhere. Not that she should have felt nervous in the first place. She was half an hour early for their—hopefully—tutoring session. She shouldn’t even expect him to be on time. But still, her chest tightened when she couldn’t find his pink tinted blonde hair anywhere.

She sighed as she looked down at the time on her phone, ignoring the fact that Virys’ name still did not show as a notification on her lock screen. She just needed to hold onto her last remnants of hope for one more hour. Most of all, she needed to ignore the little voice in the back of her mind that echoed Virys’ words from two days ago and taunted her that she was wasting her time.

You lost your chance being Virys Targaryen’s friend. He’s gone. He’s found his people. Stop trying. It won’t work.

Visaera made a beeline right to the table they sat at on Wednesday, relieved to see that it was vacant today. On Wednesday, she chose this table because it faced one of the windows and was at the farthest corner away from other patrons. The spot wouldn’t exactly avoid disrupting others, but at least it decreased the number of people they would possibly be disrupting.

He’s not coming. He made that abundantly clear. You failed to convince him.

She continued to focus intently on her tasks. After setting up her stuff at their table, she took her seat from before then went to work loading up her laptop and pulling up all her study guides. These study guides ranged from powerpoints with prepared reference charts to worksheets they could work on together. It all catered to Virys’ weaker points in High Valyrian. However, try as she might to focus on preparing for this upcoming tutoring session, the voice was growing just a little louder. She wondered if the people sitting near her could hear it.

He’s not coming, the voice echoed repeatedly in her head. It started as a low grumbling whisper and gradually grew louder and louder until everything around her was blurred. No, not blurred. It wasn’t like she was crying or anything. It was more as if her vision was shrinking down until she could only focus on what was directly in front of her. The words on her laptop screen were blinded white that she could hardly make out even a letter. She completely lost sight of everything else on the table. All that remained of her limited awareness was the taunting words that were now her constant reminder that she was being an idiot. He’s. Not. Coming.

She didn’t know how long she had been sitting at the table, but there was the temptation to just give up all hope that Virys would come and pack up her things to leave. Her last glimmer of hope was dwindling fast. As she reached for her phone to check one last time for a notification with Virys’ name on it, Visaera forced a deep breath in through her nose and slowly out through her mouth.

Just as her fingers wrapped around the currently turned down phone, she chanced one last look around the library. Some part of her buried in a small crevice in her chest was shouting at her through the taunts to look up. When those fighting words finally reached her, one moment she was staring at her phone with utter dread, the next she was watching none other than Virys Targaryen walking right to her.

Eyes wide and honestly frozen with disbelief, she watched him approach. This had to be a dream, some fantasy to keep her grounded so that she wouldn’t lose her cool and leave. She was imagining that her old friend was walking right over to her right now. But, if that was the case, wouldn’t she be imagining the last outfit he wore when they were together? Not a whole new outfit she couldn’t possibly predict he actually owned.

Then, he was standing right in front of her in all of his towering height. Visaera wanted so badly to release her death grip on her phone to reach out and touch him—to make sure he was really here, really real. Instead she kept her hand planted on the table, eyes looking him up and down waiting for the exact moment when her imagination would end and he faded away until she was alone again. But he never left and he remained solidly in front of her for another couple seconds.

It was then that she realized how quiet it was around her. The taunting words were gone. All that remained was the racing beat of her heart as the fighting words that forced her to look up rejoiced in her chest. “You’re… You’re here,” she breathed, a smile spreading across her face.

He came. He actually came.

She did it. She convinced him to come back.

As he took the same seat from last time, Visaera couldn’t stop watching his every move. Curiosity took over the emotional exhaustion from minutes before. The question she wanted to ask was right there at the tip of her tongue: what made him change his mind? Even now as he eyed her set up, she held onto the possibility that maybe, just maybe, she was the one that convinced him. The hope she thought she lost a moment ago soared through her, brightening her smile even more.

The fact that Virys decided to come back even after telling her that he wouldn’t had to mean something. While she may think of his tutoring sessions as important for him, she wouldn’t delude herself into thinking that he probably thought the same. If that were the case, he wouldn’t be in tutoring or summer school at all. He would have passed High Valyrian during the school year thus allowing him to be out with his friends doing…whatever it was that he really did. She had her suspicions about what those activities might be, after all, she heard the rumors. But no, a chain of events and a list of fateful decisions have led not just him, but them to this very moment: sitting across from each other at the local library, three years after their friendship fell apart the first time.

It was then that Visaera—all the while turning the laptop so that they could both see the screen—decided she wouldn’t make the same mistake from three years ago. She would try harder this time. She would keep her friend and not allow them to fall out ever again.

But first, they needed to get through this tutoring session.

“I think it would be a good idea for next week to do a verbal exercise. Have a guided conversation and all,” she explained. “I think you’re aware that there is a big difference between verbal fluency and written fluency. So, like, you did okay with the exercises on the proficiency test worksheet, but there are some sections that I can tell are moreso verbal knowledge than literary.” When she looked up, she was met with a strange combination of looks. First, it didn’t escape her that Virys’ gaze was hooded and…well…not entirely focused. Plus, while she had no personal experience, she was certain they were bloodshot. But all the while, it startled her that he was still…somehow…focusing on her. Did he actually retain any of the information she told him? She hadn’t the slightest clue. But there was no denying that he never once took his eyes off her as she spoke. She wondered why though. Was she speaking too quickly for his suspected intoxicated mind? Or was he maybe somehow actually invested in what she was teaching him today?

Whatever the reason, Visaera quickly turned away from his striking but hooded gaze and continued with her lesson. She wanted to at least get through her analysis and her plans for the rest of their tutoring sessions before her racing heart could distract her more than it already was.

But then he completely broke her concentration to ask if they should get out of here. Visaera blinked at her laptop screen before turning to look back at Virys. It was then that she allowed herself to actually look at him. Now that she was reassured he was actually here with her, she was free to observe him. Looking past the hooded, bloodshot eyes, she suddenly saw the dark circles made darker against the striking blue. Then there was the dull color to his skin. Has he not slept recently?

She frowned softly, leaning back into her seat. “Uh, yeah sure, where did you wanna go?” As he considered this question, Visaera was already working on collecting her things to put back into the tote bag she decided to use. She had just slipped her laptop carefully inside when she heard him mention going to the diner again, adding that he was actually pretty hungry.

Visaera couldn’t help smiling at this. But while her mind was spinning with giddy thoughts of the diner potentially being a new “their spot”, she kept her thoughts to herself as she grabbed her phone and tossed it into her bag. “Sure, but only if you’ll let me pay this time.”

Turns out Virys had the right idea moving their tutoring session to the diner. While not entirely their new location for their future sessions, Visaera admitted over their shared curly fries that she might have chosen wrong for their meeting spots. She realized this when she noticed she hadn’t controlled the volume of her voice while she reviewed the results from his proficiency test. Instead of annoyed library patrons shooting them looks for talking in the library, they had their server pause occasionally while refilling their water or coffee to listen in on their session. Apparently she hadn’t heard High Valyrian before and was moderately curious. By the time they got their check—she made sure to pay this time—they walked away with a better idea of how they, mostly Visaera, were going to continue with future sessions and having taught their server a couple phrases in High Valyrian. Overall, she thought that today was an overall win for her.

What really solidified that she was making progress in rekindling her friendship with Virys was the fact that he was texting her back more often now. They weren’t exactly going back and forth every minute of every hour of every day. But she was no longer suffering from staring at her phone for a whole day wondering if he would respond back to her. Sure…admittedly she still stared at her phone wondering if he would text her back, but at least now he wasn’t making her wait too long. The most he ever made her wait—when they were both awake of course—was about a couple hours. But, hey, it was better than twenty-four. That was for sure.

Throughout the whole weekend, Visaera honestly couldn’t stop thinking about Virys. She wouldn’t admit this outright to him during their casual text conversations. In fact, she didn’t admit this to anyone. In-between text messages when she found herself staring at her phone again waiting for his name to pop up on her lock screen, her mind would revolve around him. What was the next topic she could bring up with him once their current one ran its course? What would he think if she randomly threw in some High Valyrian? What was he doing right now? What was he thinking about right now? Was he thinking about her as much as she was thinking about him?

The thoughts were endless and at some point, she found she had lost track of time with no real recollection of what she even did that weekend.

She did, however, remember that she started telling people about him. Mostly about the tutoring since that was what they shared together. The first person she told was her mother. After all, he was the son of her favorite singer. And the last time she told her mother about being friends with him back in their freshman year, she was pretty excited. Now, well, she wasn’t exactly as excited as the first time, but she seemed awfully curious about the fact that they somehow managed to return to each other’s lives after three years. While her mother mentioned that she was happy for her, Visaera caught the worried look she tried to hide behind the boiling pot on the stove.

The next person she told was Macy. After all, that girl had been looking for answers all week. Unlike her mother though, Macy Arryn was nowhere near excited nor happy about this. Especially once Visaera had to tell her that she and Virys actually had history together. It was obviously nothing compared to whatever history any other girl at their school had with him, but it was history nonetheless. At least that was Macy’s mindset on the subject. Suffice it to say, Visaera and her best friend ended their conversation being forced to agree to disagree. Macy was very against Visaera reconnecting with Virys Targaryen. She should just “stick to the tutoring”. Meanwhile, Visaera constantly reassured her that everything was going to be fine. They were just friends after all. Famous last words.

When Visaera woke up the following Tuesday morning, her immediate first thought was about Virys. Today was the first day of summer school and she wondered if he was actually going to go. It’s one thing for her to convince him to continue with tutoring, it was a whole other thing to get him to go to class.

Still…she wondered if she could at least try.

As she prepared for her day, she composed a quick text to Virys: a simple morning greeting and the “curious” question if he’s going to class. Much to her surprise, although cutting it close to when class is supposed to start, he did reply back that he was going. At that point, she didn’t even want to press the topic any further. For all she knew, expressing her excitement at his motivation to see this through after all would do the total opposite of what she wanted. So she simply left him with a thumbs up emoji and wished him luck on his first day.

Despite having woken up at her typical time that morning, Visaera actually had a later start than usual. Sure, she got up, showered and got dressed as soon as she woke up, but she didn’t head downstairs for breakfast with her mother until a couple hours later. This was expected though. While she didn’t exactly have her own personal schedule this morning, she did agree to help her mother with some morning errands. It was the least she could do considering she would need her mother to drive her to Wyvern Farm later today.

After errands with her mother that morning, Visaera asked if she could actually make a pit stop before heading home. This was where things got a bit tight on their schedules. While her mother had no issue driving her to Wyvern Farm, it was at the knowledge that she would be dropping her off and picking her up hours later. But that plan would include back to back stops that were perfectly timed and not allocating them pit stops. Visaera knew this, was very aware of this actually. But she couldn’t help the urge boiling in the pit of her stomach while they were stopped at this particular stoplight. All they needed was to make a right and they could pass by the school.

When she looked at the clock on the dashboard, she noted immediately that Virys would be out of High Valyrian in twenty minutes.

“I will not have time,” her mother said with a sigh. But Visaera watched as the woman contemplated between the sacrifice to make this quick stop or to follow through with her already tight schedule. “We will barely have time for you to grab your riding gear at home.”

VIsaera chewed nervously on her bottom lip. If she wanted the chance to see Virys today, she had to think fast. Luckily for her, fast thinking was basically her expertise.

“How about this?” she started, keeping an eye on the adjacent green light and the pedestrian timer. “I think I will be okay waiting to head to the ranch after you’re done with your meeting. If you want, you can drop me off at the school and I can walk home. I just need to pick up a study guide from Maester Luwin for tomorrow’s tutoring session.” When her mother questioned why she couldn’t request his study guide over email, she was quick to counter that she would need his notes to better execute the lesson plan.

In the end, she won her argument and as her mother pulled up in front of the school she tried her damn hardest to hide the victorious grin spreading across her face.

Now that she was finally at the school and watching her mother drive away, Visaera suddenly stood frozen in shock over what she had just done. Sure, she could easily visit Mister Luwin to ask for study tips for her upcoming tutoring session with Virys, but…did she really want to? No. Not really. She already had a whole lesson plan for tomorrow, and she thought it was pretty solid. But…it was the best excuse she could think up on the spot as a valid reason to see Virys again.

And that was exactly why she was standing frozen in shock over her actions and decisions. Why was she even so eager to see him in the first place? After all, they were going to meet up at the diner tomorrow. And besides, she could have easily texted him after he got out of class. So why the sudden urge to see him now?

It was while she finally entered the school that she got her answer, and it was a pretty simple one. She missed him. Having committed so deeply to reconnecting with Virys and rekindling the friendship she let slip through her fingers all those years ago, she wanted every opportunity to make progress. But also, she just couldn’t stop thinking about him. Whether she was recollecting their time together last week or rereading their text conversations during her spare time, she found herself filling her thoughts with even the smallest thought of him. She didn’t even know when or why this happened, but she also didn’t try to stop it by thinking of something else. First she was simply preparing the next session. Then the next thing she knew, she was imagining what their friendship would have been like three years ago if they had known they both spoke High Valyrian. Would that have altered things?

As the bell rang to signal that class was finally over and it was time for lunch, Visaera stopped a distance away from the High Valyrian classroom and watched as students filed out. Of course, she didn’t even have to wait long. She didn’t expect many people to take High Valyrian. So before long, she watched as the tallest student in the class ducked his head into the hood of his hoodie and stuck what she could only assume was his Airpods into his ears.

“Hey!” she greeted with a bright smile. She must have caught Virys before he turned on whatever music he was listening to because he immediately looked up. “Funny bumping into you here,” she teased.

“Actually, the truth was that I’m passing by to visit Luwin about tomorrow. I wanted to see if he had a study guide I could use for the verbal.” He was doing it again, staring at her with that intense gaze, but not giving her any indication what he was thinking behind those eyes. Did he believe her? Did he think she was bullshitting? It was starting to make her nervous and she could feel the need to start rambling rise to her throat.

But before she could reach that point, she turned the attention to him. “So, how was the first day? You don't have a second class, right? Do you have any plans now that you're out?” Okay, maybe she was rambling just a bit. ​

 

[JINFINITE]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VIRYS TARGARYEN ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 062122 tab ❖ LOCATION — hospital parking garage - his car tab ❖ COMPANY — visaera
▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃
tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

Had he done this? Was this his fault? No—not fault. Fault implied negativity and seeing Visaera’s bright smiling face was just about the least negative thing on the entire planet. Manifested was the word he was looking for. Had he manifested this? Had he summoned her here with his mind? After all, Visaera had been so prominent in his thoughts ever since their first meet up in the library, and if anything she was occupying more and more of him each day.

Like how he had just sat through class using her as a mental escape to keep from getting frustrated with how shitty it was that he was stuck retaking a language that he was a native speaker of. Even though he was plenty used to Maester Luwin’s way of teaching and the examples he used, now every sentence just reminded him of Visaera as the class started sounding more and more like her tutoring session. So instead of listening to their teacher lecture all morning, Virys had been reading all the High Valyrian with Visaera’s flawless voice in his head; in turn shedding a new light on a part of him that he had been running from for years.

He hadn’t wanted to associate with anything Valyrian for so long now. The language, the culture, the people—Virys wanted nothing to do with any of it. That was why he spoke English at home despite his entire family being fluent. And why he had chopped his hair off and colored it pink. Because up until now his only experience with Valyrian had been his own disastrous train wreck of a family. A family who had beaten, neglected and abandoned him. Who overlooked and ignored him except when it was to their benefit. Virys had never felt bonded or connected to his family—neither his half siblings nor his own parents. The only commonality between them was Valyrian, and so by rejecting his roots Virys felt he was able to distance himself from associating with his Targaryen name. He didn’t want to be known for his father’s success or his generational wealth. He wanted to be his own person and so that meant having no ties to anything Valyrian.

But Visaera was making that very difficult. In just under a week she had succeeded in not only getting him to agree to spend his free time in extracurricular sessions of High Valyrian, but he had actually attended the first day of summer school...albeit he was late as he didn’t even leave the house until after she texted him about it that morning. He was giving High Valyrian more time and energy than he felt the language deserved, but Visaera had told him how much she loved the language. While he avoided it, she was drawn to it so much so that she was choosing to spend her summer break tutoring it to the most undeserving and uninterested guy in the whole school: him. He remembered every little detail she had mentioned last week on their way to the diner when she shared her entire history with High Valyrian. She truly one hundred percent loved the language.

After all, why else would she come all the way down to school to collect a study guide if she wasn’t die hard committed to it? But if Virys were to be honest, he didn’t completely believe her excuse. It just felt…too...perfect? Like, he knew she was a good student and all, and a good person in general…but really? Really?!

He wasn’t given an opportunity to call her out on it though as she flipped the spotlight onto him, ”Uhh, not really…I mean, I’m getting this off finally,” he raised his pink clad arm as he indirectly mentioned the cast he’d been stuck in for weeks and weeks and weeks on end, ”...but not till like one…something.” Shit, what time was his appointment again? Oh well, it didn’t matter, the text reminder was in his phone somewhere and he knew he had enough time to kill without stressing about needing to leave soon, ”Did you wanna—” Was he seeing things? He could have sworn she was nodding her head yes before he even finished his question, ”—go eat or—”

Yes, her answer was yes, and Virys felt a part of himself relax with the realization that he wouldn’t have to wait out his appointment time alone. He was no stranger to it, being alone that is. But it wasn’t something he enjoyed either. Whenever possible Virys preferred to be around others, that was why he had such a heavy presence in social scenes. He was forever inserting himself and agreeing to hang out or sleep with literally just about anyone. Any excuse to not go home and to not be alone with his thoughts. But it wasn’t just the fact that she agreed to spend time with him and that he wouldn’t have to wait by himself now, it was that Visaera had agreed. After three years of not talking to her, all it had taken was that one day of sitting together in the library for him to attach himself to her. He was fixated. But not quite in the way most kids their age would be. He wasn’t messaging her every second of the day, nor was he obsessively scrolling through her socials. But Visaera visited his thoughts so frequently these days that of course it now felt like she was here because he had wanted her to be. After all, he had manifested this.

It was a no-brainer for them at this point to agree on going to the same diner they had eaten at together twice now—it was becoming their diner. The only slight dilemma that Visaera was quick to point out was that she would be expected back home soon. Not immediately, but from what she shared it sounded like she wasn’t sure she would be able to commit to going anywhere with him because of the amount of time it would take her to get home afterwards, ”I’ll take you home,” there was a pause between them, their eyes meeting as Virys lay his cards out to her and Visaera contemplated her options, ”I can drop you off on my way to the hospital.”

She was of course quick to take him up on his offer, happy to have come to a solution that met both their needs; but while Visaera turned, eagerly ready to leave the school, Virys hesitantly stood his ground until she looked back and met his gaze with her own confusion, “Didn’t you want to talk to Luwin?” He then watched with mild amusement as Visaera froze like a deer in headlights for the briefest of seconds before laughing her way through embarrassment at realizing she was about to forget the whole "reason" she was here. All the while Virys watched on, taking in each detail of her: such as the way her delicate little fingers tucked her Valyrian blonde hair behind her ear.

He followed just behind her back to the very same classroom he had just exited; but while Visaera entered with a bright greeting to their teacher, Virys stayed in the doorway, leaning on the frame while he watched on. He caught Maester Luwin glancing over to him and had no doubt that he was asking Visaera how the tutoring was going. After all, no one—not even Virys himself had thought he would actually follow through with it.

Time felt like it slowed to a stop as he waited in the doorway. The nail of his index finger pushed anxiously against his thumb’s cuticle, the inside corner of his lower lip sandwiched between his teeth. His eyes never left Visaera even though her back was to him as she conversed with their teacher. Virys wanted so badly to go over to her, to stand beside her—to stand in front of her. To be between her and Maester Luwin. To both be on the receiving end of her attention but also to keep others…in this case Maester Luwin…away from her. It was a deep possessive urge that while Virys was used to it, it still felt new and scary at the same time. This was a feeling he had only felt in regards to protecting himself, never before had it extended to another. And it was no surprise that it would surface in the presence of their teacher.

Again, it was the Valyrian. Maester Luwin was the only one at school to talk to him in a way that insinuated familial ties, as though the language bonded them together somehow. None of his other teachers dared to talk to him the way Maester Luwin did, they all left him to his own devices for the most part. But not Maester Luwin…he was willing to overstep and spoke freely to Virys in a way that made him uncomfortable. It was a similar feeling to what he got at the annual lantern festival, where it felt like everyone knew all about him but he didn’t know anyone else. As though they viewed him as one of them while he felt very much on his own. But so now his own aversions were projecting towards Visaera as she broke down not only his own barriers but ones he had in place for others as well.

It was safe to say he was more than ready to leave when Visaera finally returned to his side and they could follow through on their spontaneous lunch plans. Virys had already stowed away his Airpods long before they left and so he could now hear her beautiful voice completely unobstructed, but of course the first thing she did was resume asking him about class and whether he felt like last week’s session had helped at all. He could feel his jaw clench at the continuation of th subject of High Valyrian, as if the last few minutes—the past couple hours—hadn’t been torture enough. But because it was Visaera, he forced his way through his feelings to reply. And because it was Visaera, he settled on a telling her a little white lie because he didn’t want to disappoint her by saying that her lesson plan didn’t help…because the truth was that he felt he didn’t need it, ”I think you’d make a better teacher than Luwin.”
In the end it wasn’t even a white lie, it was his own true opinion! But what it truly was was a detour from the question she had asked, completely sidepassing any acknowledgement about tutoring or class.

Much like the previous two lunches, this one altered Virys’ entire perception of time. On the one hand it once again felt like time itself completely stopped while he was with her, but it simultaneously felt like time flew out the window as they got lost in conversation with one another—”Wait, what time is your appointment again?”
”Oh shit,” Virys fumbled with picking up his phone from the table to glance at the time. He had to leave, like now, if he wanted to make it on time. But he had committed to driving Visaera home so there was no way he would manage both in the amount of time he had left. His mind was going so fast it blacked out momentarily along with his phone as the device locked itself from inactivity. Over lunch he had asked what she was doing—why she needed to be home at such a specific time, and Visaera had disclosed a piece of information about herself that felt like something he knew once upon a time ago but that it had been so long that Virys forgot: she had a horse. And her mother was supposed to drive her out to the ranch, but the timing of it all was very important to be able to fit into her mother’s busy schedule. And now it dawned on Virys that if he didn’t drop her at home on time, she wouldn’t be able to get to go and it would be all his fault. His fault. He would be the reason that she didn’t get to go see her horse, ”C’mon, let’s go. We need to get you home.”
Visaera asked about his appointment again, pointing out that she didn’t want him to miss it or be late on her behalf, ”No it’s fine, I said I would drop you off.” Again, Visaera tried to turn him down, saying she didn’t want to make him late and that she would just ask her mom to come pick her up. She had picked up her phone, preparing to call her mother and explain the situation when Virys suddenly reached out to grab her wrist. Well, he meant to take her wrist. But the reality was that his own hand completely dwarfed her and so while he did take her wrist, he also covered her entire hand thus rendering it incapable of using her phone. For a moment he didn’t say anything, his eyes were just locked on her’s while his forever foggy mind caught up to speed. Then an idea hit him, ”Come with me.”

”Come to my appointment, I’ll take you anywhere you want afterwards.” Initially she refused, likely not wanting to be any sort of burden to him, but Virys’ grip just ever so slightly tightened on her, ”Please…I want to.”
This was a side of Virys that rarely saw the light of day. This was a side of him that previously only came out when he was younger, and now only when he was drunk enough. This personable vulnerability wasn’t something he showed to just anyone, and he certainly didn’t think he would be sharing it with Visaera of all people. But here he was, middle of the day in a diner practically begging her to let him drive her around—to take her to God knows where in order to see her horse. In exchange she just had to accompany him to his doctor’s appointment. That was a fair trade, right?

Well Visaera seemed to have thought so as it wasn’t long after that Virys was closing the passenger door behind her after she climbed into his vintage Mustang. He couldn’t hold back the tiny goofy smile that surfaced after he closed his own door and glanced over to see her sitting beside him. When was the last time he had let someone else sit in his car? He honestly couldn’t even remember, but here was Visaera just a week after reconnecting with her and he was already chauffeuring her around. But as the car purred to life, Virys’ eyes were forced away from her as he started to drive.

It was Virys’ turn at first to fill the silence, asking about her horse now as he tried to fill in the gaps of his spotty memory. Every so often he would look over at her as she spoke, and he especially took advantage of the opportunity to at red lights. But it was just as she turned the conversation back onto him that another car swerved in front to cut them off and Virys’ foot slammed heavy on his brakes. Immediately his right arm flew out to hold Viasera in place against the red leather seat, but he didn't offer any sort of apology after the danger had passed.

What for? After all, apologies were for mistakes and asking for forgiveness. He wasn't sorry for braking suddenly, he just saved them and his car from injury. And he wasn't sorry for touching her, it was actually something he’d been fighting himself over all of lunch and especially so after grasping her hand earlier. This urge to be closer, and closer, and closer—and so his arm across her tiny waist with his palm on her opposite thigh was exactly everything he wanted and more. While also being nowhere near enough.

Although, it wasn't even just a lack of apologizing for the sudden action…Virys didn’t say anything. He didn't swear under his breath or yell at the other driver. He didn't even honk his horn. He was calm, and quiet—suddenly hyper focused on the single task of keeping Visaera safe. She was the only thing on his mind, even as he kept his eyes on the road, scouting ahead for the next threat of danger.

Virys didn’t remove his hand from her leg until they reached the parking structure and he needed to reverse into a parking spot, at which point he just lifted it up and over her to the back of the seat as he turned to look through his rear windshield. It wasn’t until they had parked and he pulled the key from the ignition that he finally found his voice again to ask if she was okay. It wasn’t like they had been in an accident, in fact Virys hadn’t let them even be close to being hit. But it had taken the remainder of the drive for his hidden seething temper to settle long enough for him to be able to return his focus onto her. And now she was back to being the center of his attention, as though a bubble encased his car and nothing else in the world mattered to him the way she did in that very moment.
​

​

 

[feelsHASkilig]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VISAERA CELTIGAR ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 062122 tab ❖ LOCATION — wyvern farm tab ❖ COMPANY — virys & annī
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

While waiting for the three bouncing gray dots to change into a fully composed text reply, Visaera wondered how in the world she got herself into this situation. She was currently sitting in the waiting room at the hospital. Just a couple minutes ago, a nurse popped out to call Virys’ name. He went through the door in three giant steps, leaving Visaera alone for the first time with her thoughts. To say that her mind instantly cleared the moment Virys was no longer in sight was putting it lightly. Not only was she now of sound mind to process the events starting from outside Luwin’s classroom, but it almost hit her like a train that…she had just gotten herself in a situation where she could now—without interruptions—spend time with Virys Targaryen.

Her heart stopped momentarily when the gray dots disappeared, her mother no longer typing whatever response she was in the process of sending. The longer she waited for the three dots to reappear, the more aware she was that she had suddenly stopped breathing. Why was she even nervous in the first place? It wasn’t like she was doing anything that wasn’t to her mother’s approval. By all standards, she was simply hanging out with a friend. Sure, said friend was still…a questionable relation. For all she knew, Virys didn’t think of her as a friend as she did of him. Maybe he was just entertaining her—

No. That was actually pretty silly as Visaera thought closely about it. After all, if two people weren’t friends, they wouldn’t accompany the other to a doctor’s appointment. And, most of all, they wouldn’t say what Virys had told her at the diner.

Images of that singular moment at the diner replayed in her mind as her vision faded away her surroundings. She had even forgotten completely about her anxiety over her mother’s reply. All she could focus on was how Virys’ hand consumed hers and how her heart pitter pattered at the warmth of his touch, at the way his voice almost sounded like he was pleading to her. Has his hand always covered hers like that? Or had that come with his exponential growth spurt over the three years they stopped being friends? Also, has his touch always brought on such a reaction from her?

She couldn’t remember the last time a touch caused her heart to race so rapidly while her face burned to the point she swore it was turning physically red. When was the last time she reacted that way for Deric? When was the last time Deric touched her and all she could think was how much she wanted more of it?

Her breath caught in her throat at the reminder of the desperation she felt earlier for Virys’ touch. But…it wasn’t just desperation. It was a craving. An unquenchable craving for more of what she got a simple taste of. A craving only made worse when Virys had to go into defensive driver mode to protect them from hitting another car on the way to the hospital. He had accidentally given her exactly what she wanted from the diner, only it still wasn’t enough.

At the thought of the drive to the hospital, Visaera’s eyes fell to her right thigh. Phantom touches of Virys’ hand covering her thigh left her once again fighting her racing heart and that craving for him to touch her some more. To touch more of her. She wondered then if he would ever touch her like that again. Or if that one instance was the one and only time. For the split second she let that thought linger in her mind, she thought she felt her heart drop suddenly as the fear of that reality convinced her it was going to be true. Would he really never touch her again?

Before the disappointment of those thoughts could sink in, however, Visaera felt her phone buzz in her hand. She jumped in her seat, earning her a couple strange looks from those sitting nearby in the waiting room. She ignored them as she looked down at her phone. Instead of getting a text response back, Visaera’s mother decided to call her.

“Mom?” she answered, pressing her phone against her ear. There were on and off noises on the other end, indicating to her that she was on speaker through her mother’s car. She called out a couple more times until she was finally certain she could be heard clearly.

“Honey?” her mother started. After Visaera indicated that she could hear her, the woman continued. “Yes, honey? What is this about you being out with a friend right now? Are you not going to Wyvern today?”

Visaera lifted her gaze up briefly toward the doors Virys walked through. Could she be honest with her mother about her change of plans since she was dropped off at school? Once again, she pondered over what possible reasons she had to keep Virys Targaryen a secret. Other than his infamous reputation among the student body, there was none. She liked to think that her parents trusted her decisions, especially now that she was an adult. Surely, her mother would be okay with whoever she hung out with. So she should be okay with being told exactly who was this “friend” she was with now. Not to mention, he is the son of her favorite artist.

With a deep breath and the barest grasp of courage over her decisions, Visaera said, “No, I’m still going to Wyvern. It’s just that I bumped into Virys Targaryen at school and we’re hanging out right now. I just wanted to let you know that I wouldn’t be home like we agreed.” Her heart had been pounding since she mentioned Virys’ name. But despite her nerves, she continued with, “I know you have a tight schedule today, so you can skip going home now. Virys said he’ll take me to Wyvern later.”

The silence at the other end of the line made her more nervous. The longer she waited for her mother to speak, the more she panicked that she made the wrong decision. Should she have kept Virys a secret a little while longer? At least long enough until she could find the right time to explain the full story behind why they were suddenly hanging out?

“I didn’t know you were friends with Virys Targaryen…” There was something in the way her mother said this that put Visaera on edge, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on what that was exactly. A defensiveness over Virys bubbled in the pit of her stomach, but she fought back the urge and schooled her expression to remain calm and reasonable.

After one more look around the waiting room—mostly to give herself extra time to calm her impulsive feelings over Virys—she returned her attention back to the phone conversation. “Um, yeah…I mean, it’s somewhat of a recent development,” she explained slowly. Honestly, it was a little difficult to find the appropriate words to better explain what was happening between her and Virys. At least, not in such a few words. It was already bad enough that she had to have this conversation at all among random strangers. What more if she had to go into full detail?

“Recent development? Honey, I don’t understand—”

Just then Visaera saw Virys walk back into the waiting room, immediately coming right over to her. “Hey, Mom? Listen, I have to go. I’ll text you when I’m at Wyvern. Promise. Love you, bye!” By the time she ended the call, Virys was already standing right in front of her. As soon as she dropped her phone into her bag, he asked what “that was all about.”

“Oh, I was just talking to my mom. I let her know that she didn’t have to wait for me at home anymore.”

With a nod, she collected her things from the seat next to her and stood up. “Congrats on being cast free!” she teased with a giggle. “Ready to go?”

The first thought that popped into Visaera’s head as she fastened her seatbelt was how much she wanted Virys’ hand to act as a second one. Now that he was no longer handicapped by his cast, surely it could do all of the work on the steering wheel while his right hand rested across her and on her thigh again. But as Virys turned the key in the ignition, she kept her lips closed shut and her eyes fixed directly in front of her. She didn’t dare look anywhere else until they were driving away from the hospital. At that point, Virys was asking her where he needed to take her.

Visaera blinked then turned to look at him. “Right, of course! Um…” The moment she turned her gaze right back to the road, she felt foolish. She knew exactly where Virys needed to take her next, but having been so distracted by this new insatiable craving for his touch, she completely forgot all of their new plans for the day. After taking one quick deep breath, she centered her thoughts on the next plan of action. “I need to change into my riding clothes before we head to the ranch. Do you mind driving me home first? Do you need the address or directions?”

When Virys pulled up in front of her house, Visaera surveyed the driveway for any signs of her parents being home. Her father, of course, wasn’t home yet. He was going to be in the city until late tonight for work. Her mother too was nowhere to be found. She half expected to see her car in the driveway despite her busy schedule, consumed by some curiosity over why she and Virys were suddenly on speaking terms—much less at the point where he was giving her a ride. And yet, after one more look over her house, it was silent and still. No one was home.

She turned to find Virys watching her, the same intense but hooded expression nearly burning a hole through her. She blushed at this, averting her gaze away from his. “I’m not going to take long. Do you want to come in?” At first she wanted to give him the option to come in or stay in the car. After all, it was the least she could do to ensure he still had some say in what they were doing today. However, the thought of having him stay in his car—to be further away from her with every step she took inside—felt like a decision she was not willing to agree with.

In the end, Virys agreed to come inside with her. He didn’t say much else about his choice, just a lowly grumbled “sure” as he turned off his car and climbed out.

She led the way to the front door, fumbling through her bag for her keys. After she unlocked the door and rushed over to the alarm system to disarm it, she turned back to the front door to find Virys standing awkwardly at the open doorway. It didn’t escape her how…out of place Virys suddenly felt in her home. Not that it was a bad thing. It was just…she wondered just why she had never invited him over to her house before when they were friends initially. Now, three years later, it was as if she had so many years to catch him up on something that should have been a benefit to him from the start.

“Um…come on in!” she instructed, walking back to the foyer to close the door behind him. “You can go ahead and take a seat in the living room while you wait. Do you want water…or something?” She could feel her voice shaking from nervousness.

Virys Targaryen was in her home. Not only that, she was alone with Virys Targaryen in her home. Her entire life, she always thought her home as spacious with its high ceilings and comfortable moving space between rooms and hallways. It was the kind of home fit for a Celtigar family. And yet, with Virys Targaryen standing in the middle of her hallway, she found it suddenly rather cramp. Whatever remaining air surrounded them was quickly flowing out leaving her nearly breathless.

When Virys agreed to wait in the living room, but passed on the water, Visaera watched from the entryway until he took a seat on the couch. It then took her a couple quiet seconds before she could pull herself away to retreat to her bedroom to change. All the while as she walked up the stairs, she felt a pull in her chest as if she was being demanded to return back down the stairs to take a seat next to him. She tried very hard to ignore this temptation to get through her current task.

It was once she was in the silence of her bedroom that she finally let out a relieving breath. While she still felt that pull to return to Virys, it lessened once there was a whole door and a flight of stairs between them. And just like back in the waiting room at the hospital once he had been called in, her mind cleared enough for her to think and breathe. Not that it did her any good. As she went through the task of changing into riding clothes, all she could think about was how much she wanted to change all of her plans to stay home with Virys: to enjoy the warmth of him pressed against her on the couch.

“Okay! I’m ready!” Visaera called out as she came down the stairs. Before she even made it down the last three steps, Virys was already back in the entryway watching her. She blushed again. When had he started looking at her like that? As she cleared her throat, she switched her backpack over to her other shoulder then hopped off the last step. “Real quick though, I just needa grab some snacks for Annī.”

Before she could walk around him to the kitchen, however, Virys stopped her as he insisted on carrying her bag. Just like back at the diner, she couldn’t help herself as she insisted she was okay to carry it to which Virys once more insisted that he didn’t mind. It became apparent to her that she hadn’t learned her lesson after the many times Virys had insisted on doing something that made her life easier. Not that she wasn’t grateful for such a gesture. It was just…she didn’t know what to make of it coming from him. She was just never prepared for how…courteous he was.

And then he did it again. His voice added the extra level that sounded to her like he was more than insisting on the task, he was begging her to let him do this. This quieted her. For the first time all day, she stared into his eyes. Those piercing, intimidating blue eyes that continue to instigate butterflies in her stomach. What was happening to her?? Why was she reacting so strongly to him like this??

But the better question she found herself asking as she practically challenged him was, why was he acting like this?

She returned to their first meeting a week ago to remind herself of the first time he looked at her after all these years. Had he looked at her the same way he was looking at her now? Honestly, she couldn’t remember. She had been so consumed with anxious excitement and also general nervousness over this sudden reunion she hadn’t really paid attention to further details in their brief interaction. But what she knew now was that after the first tutoring session, the one where she risked it all to convince him to stay with her, he had always looked at her the way he did now. And it unnerved her, but it also scared her. As much as she liked to think of herself as an open book, she couldn’t deny how uneven this felt. The way he looked at her—when he really looked at her—was as if he could peek deep into her soul while keeping her at arm’s length. As he looked at her with such a piercing gaze, what was he thinking? Would he let her in?

“I still can’t believe you named your horse Horses,” he commented as he shouldered her barn bag.

This was exactly what she needed to be snapped out of his trance. With a couple quick blinks, she shot him a playful glare then stepped around him to head into the kitchen. “Give me a break, Targaryen! As a girl, I thought I was being clever!”

A half hour drive later, Visaera instructed Virys on where was the best place to park as he pulled into Wyvern. She was quick to track down other owners and riders that were also walking around, not at all surprised that it was fairly busy at this time. Once Virys pulled into an available spot and turned off his car, Visaera was already unbuckling her seatbelt to exit the car. She didn’t even bother to argue with him over who was going to bring her bag. As soon as he reached behind him into the backseat to grab it, she fully passed off all possible duties to it onto him. If he wanted to be helpful, well, she was just going to have to accept it with a smile and a “thank you.”

“We’re going to store all of this stuff away first and grab my riding gear. Do you wanna help?” Visaera led the way to the storage room where all of hers and Annī’s things were kept. She continued to speak the entire time, whether it was talking about specific aspects of Wyvern that came to mind or they crossed or simply sharing more details about Annī that she recalled and hadn’t shared yet. Inside the storage room, she changed the subject to her daily routine at the ranch as well as explaining the functions of every bit of equipment she pulled out. After changing into her riding boots and deeming them ready to head over to Annī’s stall, she was carrying half of her horse’s equipment while Virys insisted on carrying most of the “heavier” items. Visaera rolled her eyes amusingly at him, but said nothing. Mostly she just thought it cute how helpful he insisted on being.

After instructing Virys on where to leave her riding gear, Visaera turned to look at him again. This time an excited grin spread from ear to ear and filled her entire face. “Are you ready??” she asked while unable to contain the little skip in her steps. Before he could even answer, she turned in the direction of the stalls to walk past four horses curiously sticking their heads out to watch them pass until they came across a stall that didn’t even have a horse ready to greet them. Not that she was at all surprised by that.

“Annī~ Come!” Visaera called out into the stall. Her focus was entirely on the other side where there was another opening leading outside. It took a couple more calls before there was a rather loud whinny and then the sound of slow but steady steps approaching. Her smile warmed as Annī, her chestnut Thoroughbred peeked his head into his stall before committing to entering again.

However, just as he was a step away from popping his head over the door, Visaera watched Annī pause and look past her. She followed his gaze to Virys. “It’s okay, my strong dragon. I brought a friend~” At that, she once more glanced over at Virys and urged him closer. ​

 

[JINFINITE]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VIRYS TARGARYEN ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 062122 tab ❖ LOCATION — wyvern ranch - his car tab ❖ COMPANY — visaera
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

Finally having the cast off his arm was such a relief. Virys had been trapped and tortured by it for weeks on end and was steadily losing his mind over how much it hindered his day to day life. He struggled to properly grip things in his left hand, and there were parts of his skin that itched so badly it burned. Showering was a hassle as he had to wrap his arm in plastic every single time…though admittedly he had messed that one up early on and had to go get a new cast after he got too high and absolutely soaked the first one in the bath. It had stretched out the sleeves of some of his slimmer hoodies, it was uncomfortable to sleep with, and—well wearing the cast had fucking sucked.

But not having it now he suddenly felt so exposed and vulnerable. Fragile. He felt weak. The doctor had warned him to take it easy for a couple weeks and that it would be normal for his arm to not have the strength it used to. But it was one thing to be told and another to experience it himself. His arm felt foreign to him, and Virys couldn’t stop rubbing it as though he had forgotten what it felt like to be touched. And in a way he had. The sensation of skin on skin was suddenly intriguing in a way he had never felt before…

Or maybe it was because his imagination had gotten the best of him, leaving him wondering what it would feel like for Visaera to touch him.

Back in his car on the way to the hospital he had touched Visaera. To keep her safe. And at the time he had been too focused to think much of it. Even immediately after it hadn’t really affected him much, after all it was far from his first time touching a girl. Virys wasn’t some virgin school boy who had never touched another’s body before. Being with girls—or guys—being with anyone didn’t phase him in the slightest. It never had. He had never experienced being excited, or nervous, or turned on through another’s non-explicitly sexual touch. But sitting on Visaera’s couch, rubbing his arm and imagining it was her hands on his skin instead—he was all of those feelings all at once.

So when Visaera returned and he took her bag from her his heart pounded in his ears as his fingers brushed hers. And when they reached the barn at which she kept her horse, he absolutely relished in each exchange of skin to skin as he took as much of her gear as he could carry, despite the weakened strength in his left arm.

But then when given the opportunity to move closer to her—when she invited him over to meet her horse—Virys hesitated and remained frozen in place. His eyes flickered away from Visaera to look past her at her majestic copper pet—steed—horse. His hands fidgeted with the oversized sleeves of his hoodie at his side, shifting his weight as though trying to will himself forward but still finding himself rooted in place where he stood, a safe distance from the stall door.

But the 1000 lbs animal was not the one making him nervous.

No. Virys didn’t get nervous. Least he never had before—never like this. Nervous for Virys was the uncertainty he got when his brothers came home and not knowing if he would be a punching bag, a scapegoat or invisible to them; except, that was scared. Nervous was the first day of a school year and not knowing if his new teachers would treat him with respect or just immediately write him off because of his reputation; except, that was distrust. Nervous was sitting down for dinner with his parents and his mother wouldn’t even look at him; except, that was guilt.

But this? There was no way this was nervous. It couldn’t be. But Virys didn’t have any other name for the way his stomach flipped watching Visaera turn to look back at him.

He had been perfectly content, happy even, to be at her side all afternoon. He had even felt his heart skip a beat with excitement when he had left the doctor’s office and saw her still waiting for him in the lobby. And not to mention all those moments he had been craving and fantasizing for her touch. But now Virys couldn’t even bring himself to take a single step closer to her.

His bright blue eyes left Horses to look back down at Visaera, and not just towards her…but down at her—taking in every single detail to the point he was practically looking through her. There was the way she had pulled her hair back in a ponytail to keep the blonde out of her way here at the barn. It was simple enough, innocent…but it exposed her neck and the cut of her shirt allowed her collarbones to just peek out. Her own eyes were excited and eagerly waiting for him to move. He’d seen this look before. It was similar to how she looked at him anytime he agreed with something she said or asked of him, which in turn was exactly why he would agree with her in order to get this reaction out of her. To get this perfect smile she had right now beaming up at him in a way that no one, literally no one had ever shown towards him.

But back to her neck—her shirt—her chest—her breasts—surely he had seen her dressed up before in fancier clothes. But Virys felt like he had only seen her covered up in sweaters and such till now. That her school outfits hid her body in a way that this….what had she called it….a sun shirt? It was sculpted to her form like it was custom made for her—hell for all he knew it very well could have been!

It clung to her waist like a second skin and was tucked neatly into her leggings…tights…whatever they were. There was a belt between them, above her hips and obviously purely decorative the way her pants were practically glued to her. They were tight. Much tighter than her shirt. In fact as she shifted her stance he could see the rippling outline of the muscles in her legs as they flexed. And then there was the back of them. Virys could remember her mentioning something about it being called ‘full seat’, but the image had instead fully seated itself in his mind and had thoroughly distracted him from listening to the rest of her explanation as to why she was wearing the ass part of ass-less chaps that he would have associated with a slutty cowboy/girl Halloween costume.

And then there were the boots. Black and formed to her calves the way superheroes’ were. They did nothing to give her height the way you would expect of boots that went that far up her leg, but that was of little to no concern to Virys. He liked being able to look down and take in all of her at once—even as he was currently breaking her down in sections in his mind as though he had never seen the female body up close before.

He coughed lightly, both to reset his voice and to clear his throat as he felt himself begin to choke from having not swallowed in a minute or two while Visaera had commanded all of his focus. It felt like so long ago now since she had called him to join her at the door to Horses’ stall but he still hadn’t made a single step to approach them. His eyes flickered back to Horses, then back over her form again briefly before he finally took a step…in the wrong direction.

”Uhh…sorry I’m gonna—” Virys’ hand ran awkwardly over the back of his neck and pulled his hoodie closer to adjust how it fell over his shoulders, ”—gonna go take a piss,” he took another shuffle step back, ”I’ll be right back…don’t—“ he pointed to her, ”Don’t go anywhere. Kay?” Virys was steadily moving backwards now, but seemingly still unwilling to turn away from her despite saying that he needed to leave. But just as he managed to convince himself to look away, she piped up to ask if he knew where to go.

Fuck.

No, obviously not. He didn’t know where anything was here but he didn’t really need to go to the bathroom, he just needed to get away for a moment. Virys needed space away from
Visaera to calm and collect himself from whatever spell she had put on him ever since they had left the hospital. So he held back just long enough for Visaera to give him directions, but Virys wasn’t listening to her, at least not to her words. He just focused on her lips; on the tone and rhythm of her voice and then promptly had to fight himself as his feet tried to root him in place to stay with her while his mind was begging to move.

Once Virys managed to leave, his long strides made short work of the distance between Horses’ stall and where his car was parked on the other side of the property. He got a fair amount of strange looks and hard stares from the people he passed, which Virys was used to, he was often the outlier everywhere he went. Usually he didn’t mind too much, but he would often stare back or make a point to comment on the looks he received. But not today, not right now. He was blind to anything in his peripherals, completely focused on getting to his car and once inside allowing himself to collapse back against his seat. His blue eyes finally danced over to check his side mirrors as though half expecting to see Visaera someone following him, but no one was there. Next he glanced in his rearview but again, no one. Just his own confused reflection, but as he stared at himself he began to tune in to the rest of his body. Like how quickly his heart was beating, and sending an inside out sensation to his stomach—it felt like his heart was at the base of his throat and threatening to escape. He tugged at his clothes again, first at his hood and then traveling lower. He felt constricted and claustrophobic in his own skin and feeling the friction of fabric was sending him into sensory hell.

Especially the way his pants rested so uncomfortably low across his waistline.

This was a first for Virys. He had experienced a lot in his short eighteen years of life thus far, but he could with absolute certainty say that he had never been turned on without cause before. That is to say, without direct physical contact of some sort—either another’s or his own. He had tried, ohhhh had he tried. Virys tried everything to be normal, but images and videos that would turn his peers into horny teenage disasters did absolutely nothing to him. Virys had learned how to fit in, what to say, and how to act…but none of it was him. None of it came naturally to him. And while yes, sex felt good during the act, the before and after always left him feeling sick and disgusted with himself. Maddie had rose to the challenge and learned what buttons to push to turn him on, but even she still had to work for it. So why—what had Visaera done to him for him to be getting aroused just from watching her!?

But besides it being wildly inappropriate for him to take care of himself here, in the parking lot of Visaera’s ranch. It was honestly the last thing Virys wanted to do. Even just thinking about it was drowning the butterflies in his stomach in nauseating acid. The brief reprieve he would get would not be worth the revolting feelings he was sure he would be left with when he was done, especially considering he would have to go back out to her. It wasn’t like he was at home and could just hole up in his shower or sleep off his self disgust afterwards.

So instead Virys won the battle over himself via another method, he numbed his senses. By the time he was rolling his windows back up, the fabric in the car had renewed its perma-scent of weed. He leaned back against the driver’s seat one last time, his once blue eyes were now near black from dilation and stared fixated on the rearview mirror as he opened his mouth one last time to exhale his final breath of dragon smoke. When his view cleared, he found Visaera’s face staring back at him in the mirror, taunting and teasing him with the raise of an eyebrow that turned her smile from sweet to sultry, ”Nuha…”

He really had no idea how long he had been gone for, but by the time he returned Visaera looked to be adding the final touches to Horses as she crouched down to velcro what looked like horse size shin guards around his front legs.
”I think I got lost,” Virys didn’t give her the chance to question what took him so long, but neither did he give a definitive excuse for his disappearance—a tactic he had mastered years ago as the youngest in a household of six.

He couldn’t be sure whether she believed him or not, but she didn’t say otherwise and so Virys followed her out of the stall areas and towards the large arena space. There were benches along the fence line that Visaera pointed out as a place he could sit and watch, if he wanted. But Virys looked over to see a couple older women staring very intently at a young girl on a horse currently already in the arena. They both wore mostly white despite being surrounded by dust and animals, but what stood out the most was the pretenious air surrounding them. Virys could spot that familiar feeling from a mile away and he had no intentions of getting too close to it. On the one hand he didn’t care what others thought of him, what difference did it make if these women judged him on his appearance alone? But at the same time he hated the tension that came from those types of interactions and he wasn’t sober enough to trust himself to not say something back if they addressed him. He was however sober enough to have the self awareness to keep himself from getting stuck in that type of situation and he stood his ground rather than moving to the benches, ”Can I just go in with you?”

He was quick to pick up on the way Visaera now took her turn to glance around at the others as she made her own calculations on how they might react, but in the end she agreed and let him follow her into the arena instead, instructing him to instead sit on the block of stairs near the fenceline. It was almost instantaneous after that. The other rider in the ring, the women on the benches, hell the entire world blurred out of focus as he sat and watched Visaera mount her horse. She was the only one to remain clear to see and his eyes never once looked away as she went about warming up by doing a bunch of circles in both directions and different speeds before finally pointing Horses towards one of the smaller jumps set up in the center.

Virys’ breath caught in his chest as she soared over the jump, easily clearing it by a mile and circling to take the next one right away. He really wasn’t sure what he had envisioned when Visaera talked about having a horse, but seeing it in person now the partnership between her and Horses was very apparent—it was honestly beautiful. They were so in sync with each other in a way that Virys never would have imagined possible.

If anyone had a problem with Virys’ presence in the arena it flew far higher over his head than he was. Visaera remained the center of his fixation for the entire thirty five minutes she was in the arena until she slowed to a final halt just in front of him. Virys stood up, his balance adjusting to the lumps in the arena sand as he took the few steps closer to her. Horses’ nose was quick to poke into his personal space and Virys instinctively lifted his hand as though to offer it to him, only to hesitant as he realized he had run away from Visaera’s previous attempt to introduce them earlier.

With her encouragement, he did manage to reach out, allowing Horses’ to first sniff his hand before continuong on to pat him on the neck, “You should get on next time!”

Next time…? Virys looked up from petting Horses to see Visaera’s bright smile beaming down at him. His heart stuttered at the thought of there being a next time—to come back here with Visaera for a personal visit rather than as a chauffeur. And that she wanted him to get on her horse of all things?? To be honest that part was a little unnerving to think about, but the meaning behind it struck him like an arrow from Cupid himself. Surely Horses was very special and important to her, much like his vintage car was to Virys. But she trusted him and wanted to share with him, and that openness was a new feeling that he was not familiar with.

Virys was much more accustomed to people cutting him out; closing themselves off and wanting nothing to do with him. After all that was the family dynamic he had grown up with. His own parents didn’t want him around so they sent him up here to Berkeley. But his extended family in Berkeley didn’t want him either and more often than not made an active effort to exclude him as much as possible. His teachers at school all complained when he showed up on their roster and the student body was forever in an uproar over whether they hated or worshiped him.

He was never picked unless someone wanted something from him. And so the thought crossed his mind as his dilated pupils fixated hard on Visaera: what did she want from him?

“Can you hold him for me while I get off? He can be a little wiggly sometimes.” At her request he blinked out of his thoughts and awkwardly reached out, carefully placing one hand on either side of Horses’ large neck and earning an immediate outburst of giggles from Visaera who quickly clarified she meant to hold the reins.

Oh.

Horses stopped trying to shuffle backwards once Virys switched to holding the reins, his grip light and at arm’s length from his body. But that distance quickly closed as he watched Visaera swing her right leg up and over Horses’ neck so she now faced Virys straight on and looked as though she was going to either jump the rest of the way or lower herself down to the ground.

She didn’t manage to do either. Before she could leave the saddle Virys had dropped Horses’ reins and reached to hold Visaera instead. Lifting her down bridal style instead and ever so slowly and carefully lowering till her feet touched the arena sand. As he straightened up his arms naturally released Visaera as it just wasn’t physically possible to continue to hold her when she was so much closer to the ground than he was. But his hands still lingered longer than they needed to, subconsciously savoring every second of contact they had with her.

And they would continue to feel her phantom touches long after they left the arena. Virys’ hands closed in on themselves, his own thumb rubbing across his skin as his mind remembered what Visaera’s felt to touch. Visaera herself was busy removing the saddle and all the rest of Horses’ gear while Virys was deep in thought as he dissected his feelings. He couldn’t get over how foreign his own body felt to him today, but neither was he able to come to any conclusions as to what any of it meant or figure out what he was supposed to do about it.

His eyes followed Visaera’s every movement all the way up until she appeared before him holding a carrot out for him to take, ”Nah I’m good…I don’t really like carrots like that…”
After another giggle fit from Visaera she explained it was to feed to Horses. So now armed with a carrot he approached, but rather than outright offering it to Horses there was some clear hesitation when Horses stretched his neck out to try and reach for the snack, ”H-how do I—“ Again Horses lunged forward, growing impatient waiting for his carrot while Virys took a half step back as he valued keeping all his fingers intact. He hadn’t been intimidated by Horses earlier, in fact Virys had even tried to hold him by his neck! But there was something about feeding him and the size of his teeth that switched Virys’ self preservation from its usual low setting to high.
”Just hold it out, he’ll take it from you. “

Virys tried. He raised his hand and reclaimed that half step closer, but as soon as Horses’ lips bumped into the carrot his grip loosened and it dropped to the floor.
”Don’t let go till he takes it! Here, try again. “
He tried again—tried to opt out that is. Virys shook his head and mumbled out that he would be okay skipping the experience while Visaera retrieved the carrot, but the second she touched his hand he felt his pulse skyrocket as his fixation returned to her skin against his. She set the carrot against his palm, waiting for his fingers to close around and grasp it before then in turn wrapping her own hand around as much of his as she could. With Visaera leading his hand and holding him within reach of Horses, he was able to successfully feed him the carrot this time, however Virys was far from aware of anything other than the feeling of Visaera’s hand around his. He didn’t even react when Horses nudged him with his lips when he reached the base of the carrot, in fact he wasn’t even watching their hands anymore. Virys was watching how Visaera’s face had lit up in pure glee while they fed her horse. And once the carrot had fully left his hand his wrist twisted around so his fingers could gently latch onto her hand instead while it lowered to their sides.

”What?”
His hyperfocus had rendered him deaf and distracted to the rest of the world, so when Visaera mentioned that she would put Annī away and then they could leave, it didn’t register to Virys until she repeated herself for him. The word “leave” dropped Virys back into reality and his hand immediately released hers, not even aware of when or how he had taken it in the first place, ”Alright, yeah…”

Virys stepped back to stay out of her way, running his now empty hand through his pale pink hair as a sense of dread and anxiety gripped at his still racing heart with every step away from him that Visaera took. Was this it then? He would bring her back home they’d call it a day? But…what if he wasn’t ready for her to leave? All day he had jumped at every opportunity to prolong their time together; he had invited her to eat, offered to drive her home, asked her to go to his appointment with him by bargaining to bring her here to the ranch…but what now? Was he just going to drop her back at home?

These thoughts tossed and turned in his head the entire rest of the time they were there, up until the car doors shut and Visaera had just finished buckling her seat belt, ”Do you have to go home right now?”
He met her questioning gaze head on, but didn’t dare expand on what he was asking. He didn’t need her to know just how desperate he was right now. But the world was their oyster, they could go anywhere! Snacks at a convenience store, go chill at the mall, see a movie, hell Virys would be content even just aimlessly driving around. He just wasn’t ready to give Visaera up and so would take any excuse to make this day last as long as he could.
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[feelsHASkilig]

(♚) tab ▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀▀ tab VISAERA CELTIGAR ⋮⋮
tab ❖ DATE — 062522 tab ❖ LOCATION — sunvalley mall tab ❖ COMPANY — macy (via facetime)
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tab tab tab ENGLISH tab tab tab HIGH VALYRIAN tab tab tab OTHERS (ENGLISH) tab tab tab OTHERS (HIGH VALYRIAN)

If there was anything Visaera wanted to accomplish this summer, it was to make Virys more comfortable around Annī. Well, the first thing she would need to accomplish before that was to make Virys comfortable with Annī in general. But she was determined to have her friend riding her horse before school started. Hell, maybe even by the time he finished summer school!

She was so distracted by her plan of action—also known as Operation Get Virys on Horses—that she apparently missed all that was being said to her. She blinked and turned her head forward to find Erro, Annī’s trainer, watching her closely with his large arms crossed over his equally large chest. Her cheeks flushed having realized she was caught slipping and climbed down from the fence she was hanging onto. She had been instructed to stay outside of the arena while Erro made her dragon run laps.

She was also instructed to pay attention.

“Sorry, Erro. What were you saying?” she asked after entering the arena, having now just realized he opened the gate for her earlier.

The brutishly large man shook his head amusingly as he whistled for Annī to return to them from the other end of the arena. “I cannot recall the last time I have ever seen you so distracted,” he said while keeping his eyes on her horse. “Does it have anything to do with that boy you’ve been taking here all week?”

Visaera’s cheeks burned brighter. How did he find out about Virys? But also, Erro was getting his facts wrong. She hadn’t brought Virys to the barn all week. It’s only been three times.

While she wasn’t certain how long this would continue, Virys had offered after the first visit to drive her to Wyvern after their tutoring sessions. He had initially insisted that he wouldn’t mind taking her every day she wanted to visit—which he discovered was, indeed, everyday—but Visaera was quick to voice her concern that such an obligation would keep him away from his own plans. He was aware now how often and how long she typically stayed at the ranch. But she knew that…well…he’s Virys Targaryen. As much as she enjoys how often they are spending time together now, she couldn’t just ignore the fact that he has a whole other life outside of her. So she can’t be selfish and take up all of his time over an obligation he might someday grow tired of fulfilling. That was how they reached the compromise that he would drive her after their tutoring sessions.

And so, Erro wasn’t entirely correct. As it has only been a week since she first brought Virys to Wyvern, he has only driven and accompanied her two more times. That shouldn’t have been enough time for him to find out about it.

Except that apparently the first visit alone was enough for word to spread. As Visaera watched Annī canter across the full length of the arena, Erro explained that some of the other riders—specifically the older women that weren’t exactly riders, but spent all of their free time at the barn with their “hobby horses”—were talking a lot about the “strange boy”. Visaera bristled at the description, but she didn’t want to voice her protest just yet. She wanted to know as much as she could. Erro shared with her how confused these gossipers were at seeing Virys with her more than once this week, especially the apparently “public display” they exhibited that first day.

If Visaera thought she couldn’t blush any brighter, she was sorely mistaken. She wasn’t certain Erro knew all there was to know, but she didn’t want to be the one to tell him that this “public display” he was referencing wasn’t a one time thing. In fact, Virys has somehow adopted this in the two times he accompanied her into the arena. And despite it occurring more than once, she still was left flustered whenever Virys helped her off Annī by carrying her bridal style to the ground.

And yet, she finds herself wishing for it to continue for as long as he offers to come with her.

Visaera remained distracted by thoughts of Virys the entire duration of her visit to Wyvern. It was so bad that Erro was concerned over her riding Annī. So instead of the drills they had planned today—Annī was scheduled to begin full-time training in July—they instead agreed to give the dragon a break and walked him around the property. When Erro managed to hold onto Visaera’s attention, he wasted no time talking about his strategies to prepare him for upcoming competitions. He was also in constant contact with Annī’s competition rider working out a training schedule. Visaera mostly listened. The only time she contributed was when she had her own suggestions that she felt would benefit the training season. After years of competing and even longer being Annī’s rider and owner, she felt it was important to remain involved through her retirement while also remembering that she still had much to learn.

Her mother was waiting for them near the stalls when they returned from their walk. While she was usually more involved in their visits, Visaera forgave her mother’s absence today. After all, the woman was on a tight and busy schedule and constantly on her phone. It was a miracle she agreed to stay the entire duration of their visit to Wyvern. Honestly, Visaera half expected her mother to grow restless and tell her that she would come back after finishing with her appointments.

“Do I have time to brush out Annī?” she asked once her mother was in earshot. “Or if you want, I can stay and wait here until you’re done.”

Her additional suggestion was met with the deepest frown from her mother. “Honey, you know I’m going to be moving around all day. I don’t feel comfortable leaving you here well into the evening.”

Visaera watched as Erro tied Annī to one of the posts before wandering into the locker room to grab the brushes. She had a suggestion immediately pop into her head at her mother’s concerns. It seemed like a fairly reasonable suggestion too. But despite her mother knowing all about her blossoming re-friendship with Virys, Visaera still wasn’t entirely comfortable bringing him up so casually. Not because there was anything wrong with her friendship with Virys. She didn’t have any reason to keep him a secret. It was more so that she felt prematurely defensive over him. Which was honestly quite ridiculous. While her mother had initially been concerned about her spending time with Virys outside of their tutoring sessions, she didn’t hold onto those reservations for very long. By the end of their talk earlier that week, her mother seemed almost pleased that they were friends. She hoped that it didn’t have anything to do with him being her favorite singer’s son.

So when she instantly considered the idea of asking Virys to come pick her up from the barn, Visaera just as quickly held her tongue from voicing it out. She couldn’t guess how her already stressed out mother would feel about unloading the responsibility of driving Visaera around. On the one hand, she was sure it would relieve her mother. But on the other…she couldn’t figure out if that relief would even exist while the woman was already stressed.

In the end, Visaera pushed down the idea of reaching out to VIrys and reassured her mother that she and Erro would finish brushing out Annī as quickly as possible before they could leave.

Visaera had just enough time to change out of her riding clothes—completely avoiding the fact that she didn’t even need them today—before she needed to rush into her mother’s car with a quick goodbye to Erro and Annī. Her last look out onto the barn as they drove off was Annī sticking his head out of his stall to watch them leave. He was still watching them by the time she lost sight of him.

“I’m sorry, honey, that I can’t take you back home. It’s just that I’m cutting it close, meeting up with Cheryl, and Concord is closer from Wyvern.” This was the second time today that her mother apologized for having such a tight schedule.

Visaera looked over at her with a soft smile. It wasn’t like she had a choice over the situation. Her mother had offered to still drive her to Wyvern today knowing that she had a full and busy schedule for the rest of the day. It was the reason she had to reach out to Erro to ask if he could meet up for training earlier in the morning than originally scheduled. After that, the least she could do was tag along to save time and distance. Like she mentioned, Concord was closer from the ranch than if she had to drive there from Berkeley.

“How many venues are you and Cheryl looking at today?” Visaera asked in an attempt to move away from this guilt her mother was still probably feeling. What’s done is done. And it was better knowing that she could tag along with her mother than sit anxiously waiting for the possibility that she could see Virys today. It was Saturday after all. For all she knew, Virys already made plans with other people.

In truth, Visaera knew that Virys was only a text message away. He still took a bit of time to respond back, but he has responded more frequently since they exchanged numbers. However, while much of their conversation—typically led by Visaera—revolved around getting to know each other the best that they could, she stops short of asking outright if he is available to hang out. Honestly, she would rather he suggested it because it meant that he has time for her. Somehow she felt that she would always find time for him if he asked.

Don’t get Visaera wrong. She is still very happy that she and Virys managed to rekindle their friendship after so many years. But she still could not get past the fact that it has, truly, been years. While she had no problems continuing where they last left off, she couldn’t guarantee that he felt the same. They still only hung out on tutoring days since they were already seeing each other. But that doesn’t stop her from feeling butterflies in her stomach every time he asked if they could do other things to prolong spending time together.

However, she couldn’t risk those poor creatures getting disappointed if she braved the chance to ask him to hang out outside of tutoring days and he said no. So, here we are, Visaera once more wishing she was sitting in the passenger seat of Virys’ car, but being too chicken to ask for it.

“How about this?” Visaera’s mother started. “I don’t think you will so much enjoy being dragged along to four different venues. So what about if you come along with me to the first one since I’m already cutting it close to the appointment time? If you want to stay in the car, that’s fine. You’re also more than welcome to come in with us.” Visaera waited silently for the rest of the proposal.

“We will probably be looking around for about an hour or so? After that, our next viewing isn’t until two, so maybe we can grab lunch at Sunvalley. Then, when it’s time for me and Cheryl to go to our next venue, you can stay at the mall until I’m all done. Do some shopping while you wait for me!”

It wasn’t a terrible idea. Actually, it was sort of perfect timing on Visaera’s part. She was due a shopping trip soon to prepare for a party she was attending in a couple weeks with Deric, Macy and a couple more of their friends. She probably did already have something to wear currently in her closet, but honestly, any excuse to get herself a new wardrobe is always appreciated. But while she had initially considered just going to Fourth Street since it was closer to her, she was also flexible enough to take any opportunity placed in front of her when it presented itself. She was sure she could find something in Sunvalley.

Their plans went as smoothly as they could probably imagine it. Visaera opted to join her mother at the first venue viewing. For the most part, she followed behind quietly while her mother and her event planner, Cheryl, discussed the pros and cons of the space. She knew that they probably wouldn’t fall in love with the space just yet, but she also couldn’t deny it had its potential.

“The piano could go over there and maybe set up an elevated stage for the performers,” she overheard Cheryl suggest as the two women stood at one corner of the space. Visaera had been looking out the tall window onto the outdoor area. It was currently being set up for another event. But while her eyes were watching the staff setting up tables and chairs, her mind was elsewhere.

Her grip tightened briefly around her phone at the thought of Virys. The temptation to just message him was growing stronger, but even if she caved into the temptation, what would she say to him?

“Hey what’s up?!” That was too lame, even for Visaera’s standards.

“What are you up to?” Somehow that felt too suggestive…of what, she had no clue.

“Wanna hang out” was not even remotely an option.

The longer she considered it, however, the more she lost her courage. In the end, she pocketed her phone once again and walked over to where her mother was standing.

“Oh, Visaera!” Cheryl cried out suddenly. “I’ve been meaning to ask you. Are you still available next Monday to assist us with the auditions?”

Visaera nodded. “Of course. It’s still going to be in the afternoon, right? I have a tutoring session early in the afternoon and it usually runs for about an hour.” In the back of her mind, she imagined Virys’ “are you doing anything right now” repeatedly. What would he say or do if she told him that she actually had plans immediately after their tutoring? Would this be the reason he ceased his offer to drive her to Wyvern?

She had this crazy notion of asking her mother and Cheryl to reschedule the auditions for another time. But even as she was thinking about it she knew it was a stupid idea. Sure, these auditions weren’t for a big and important competition. She was helping them pick out performers for their charity event; the same event they were currently looking for a venue to hold it. But they had these auditions scheduled for weeks now and she was sure that everyone that signed up to audition worked their schedules around it. So, yes, it was stupid of her to consider asking to move to another date for a boy.

She would just have to figure it all out on Monday.

The charity event was all her mother and Cheryl talked about as they had lunch. Occasionally one of them would stray away from event planning talk to rope her back into conversation by asking about her summer plans. For the most part though, Visaera kept to herself throughout lunch. Every so often one of her friends would text her and she was very happy to respond back. But there was no denying that every time she picked up her phone, she wished it was Virys. She knew obviously that to remedy this she could just text him first, but again, she felt every conversation starter she thought up was subpar to keep his attention. If only their conversation last night hadn’t come to a clear end then she could have easily kept it going right now.

If only she had the courage to just ask without thinking too much into it what he was doing right now.

And that was all she thought about for the rest of lunch. After saying goodbye to both women, Visaera walked off into the rest of the mall to begin her quest for the party outfit. Where to even begin?

Shopping ended up doing her some good. Now that she had a clear goal in mind, she found that she hardly got distracted by thoughts of Virys. In fact, she hadn’t once stalked looked at his Instagram profile to see if he uploaded any new posts or something on his Story. She also thought less about texting him.

She was especially invested in her goal to find the “perfect” outfit for the party when it came to shoes. A part of Visaera considered keeping things simple by buying a comfortable but cute pair. Maybe some booties or a pair of wedges. But there was another, more curious part of her that contemplated something more…bold. Probably not stilettos, but she wouldn’t mind the height of them. And considering she was going to be at a party, she would probably need as much height as possible to not get lost in the crowd.

Visaera browsed the platform shoes Aldo offered. It seemed like a good option between the two criteria she wanted. She also had Macy on FaceTime, constantly asking for her opinion on any pair she picked out from the displays. By the time she found a bench to sit at to try on her shoes, she had five pairs of platform shoes to try on.

“Oh those pink ones are hella cute! It’s giving Barbie honestly!” Macy commented. Visaera took the call through her Airpods now so that their conversation was more private. She slipped off the white pair she had just tried on and then reached over to the pink pair. Just as she was slipping them on and securing the straps, she vaguely heard some raised voices through Macy’s commentary about how she should find a top that would go well with the pink pair—assuming she decided to buy them.

“Whoa wait, what was that? It sounds like a mob just ran past or something.” With Visaera still busy securing the straps around her feet, she just missed whatever it was Macy was talking about. The best she got was the back of whatever group was walking past the store, but even then the view of them was obstructed by the display at the window. As she turned back to her phone, she merely shrugged and said that she hadn’t seen them in time.

Once the shoes were securely on her feet, she picked up her phone off the floor and walked over to the nearest mirror. In truth, the platforms were surprisingly comfortable to walk in. The height was likely a factor she would need to adjust to for the next couple weeks, but she was sure that she could get the hang of them once they were fully broken in.

Macy was practically cackling with excitement in her ear. “Oh, my God! Visaera Celtigar, those shoes look hot on you! You have to get them!” Visaera winced as more squealing deafened her ears. “Shit, Deric is going to trip all over himself when he sees you in those!”

It was at that moment that it all came crashing down. After a solid hour without a single active thought about him, Visaera realized as she stared at her legs in the mirror that it wasn’t Deric she was imagining tripping over himself.

It was Virys. ​