He sighed. He hadn't really told anyone about this in... well, ever, really. After a certain point, nobody wanted to hear it, and Dr. F already knew, and he hadn't much talked to anyone with any depth since then, so... He took a deep breath, sort of stared off into the distance, and began.
"Okay, so, you were in the States, Canada, about twenty-some years ago. You ever heard of the show "Doogie Howser, MD" about a high school kid who's a full-on doctor? That was kind of me, just set a little bit younger. By the time I was 18, I was finishing up med school and entering residency. My mom had died when I was young and my dad... my odd dad... pushed me. Hard. By the time I was 25, I was in practice, and making mad cash. And pretty much spending almost all of it irresponsibly, because I never got to cut loose as a young person, so I was taking it all out when I was finally independent. Which is how I got to drinking too much, doing too much blow..." He sighed. He didn't like thinking back on that part of his life, but it was necessary.
"In short, I fucked up, and got thrown out. Disbarred. Eliminated. Behind the ol' 8-ball. And no school would hire me to teach medicine I wasn't allowed to practice. From genius to jerkwad in a dozen easy steps." He shook his head. "My odd dad disowned me, and I haven't talked to him in years. And then I did the wonderfully smart thing and got mixed up with the Mob. See, crime syndicates don't much care about formal licensing, and they always need people to, say, remove bullets without reporting it to the police, or the like. I did a lot of that, and they paid well. It was when they wanted me to inflict pain that... well, even at that point, I had a few scruples left. But if you remember anything about the Mob from popular media, you probably remember they hold grudges.
"So I'm trying to survive and stay mobile so I don't get a mysterious visitor in the middle of the night when I get a mysterious message. Doctor Felidae, you see, is a luminary in the genetics field because of his early research, but his star has fallen a great deal since he started espousing theories about lycanthropes. He still has swing, but he needed assistance, and none of the reputable scientists wanted to sully their careers with his crackpot theories. So he needed someone intelligent and capable who could stand to be associated with him, i.e. someone with nothing left to lose. Enter: me.
"I love medicine, Serai, I always did, even when I was being pushed into it. I'm good at it, I'm good at the science and the treatments and... And when I couldn't do it anymore, it just about killed me. I thought about eating a bullet a lot at that time. And Dr. F, he can clear it up. If I give him help on his project, he can get me back into the life. Maybe I'll never work in a hospital again, but I can be involved in science, I can..." He stopped himself, as he was waxing enthusiastic about the whole thing, and it was beginning to sound like trying to justify his actions. Which, he had to admit, was the point. And that's why he had to stop.
"That's the hold he's got on me, Serai," Jackson finished in a small voice. "If I'm not a loyal and true lab assistant, if I'm not a good Igor to his Frankenstein, then I get to go back to squalor and probably two bullets in the skull when the nice Sicilian boys finally catch up to me." And that's why I can't let you go, much as I want to, he wanted to say, but he couldn't. Was his future more important than an innocent woman's freedom? It used to be easier to say yes, but now...