My Sisters Keeper (DigitalSiren x Staine)

[Bunny]

Willow gazed out of the car window, the decorative awning sheltered the doorman in his fancy uniform from the rain that pounded on the car roof. Sharp little metallic pings that also helped drown out the perky social worker who cheerily tried to reassure her that this place, in the ritzy side of the city was the best place for her, great place to start again. Blah.. blah.. blah. Rolling her jade eyes, Willow gave a loud sigh that only a teenager could manage filled with annoyance and boredom in equal measurements. The state had found her two junkie parents unfit to care for her.. shocking. Who would have guess that the two people who had had another child, her older brother in fact who emancipated himself from their tender care were unfit parents.

It was unsurprising that Willow had little faith in the system at this point. She had been three when Caleb had left.. CPS had tried to take her away as well, but somehow.. her parents had been found competent? The only abuse at the time had been to Caleb. That however had changed quickly enough. It had started small enough in places and in ways that were easily explained in the visits by CPS that plague her parents. As the visits slacked off and other children were made priority the abuse escalated. Burns, beatings.. As a small child she had little recourse. It was.. normal wasn't it? And that is how Willow came to grow up in her own personal hell. She was thirteen when she cut herself the first time, it was something she had control over and the sweet rush of pain was something she came to look forward to. A release from her world, her life... It was that started the second wave from CPS and what eventually lead her here, in the car of an annoyingly chatty woman parted in front of her brother's apartment. And hey, she was only sixteen now.. only thirteen years in hell was getting off easy.

At some point the chatty Cathy had exited and hand come around to her door and opened it. Cool air brushed her face, tendrils of pink catching in the breeze. Brushing back her hair Willow exited the car, standing in the downpour. Cathy, or whatever her name was made a soft clucking noise and gently pulled her under the shelter of the awning, tisking her softly. "Don't you want to look your best for your brother?" Willow offered a shrug. "Why bother" She could honestly care less. He had left her to rot in the shit hole with her parents.. He was just as bad as them as far as she was concerned. Besides it's not like the rain was going to do her much harm. She hadn't showered in the past few days at her foster home.. Her foster "dad" had been quite the lecherous perv. Dressed in a fine fishnet body suit, a black skirt with little white crosses on each pleat and a black crop top with long sleeves that hid her scars. A pair of platform heels with matching crosses completed her 'look'.

Guided past the smiling doorman and through the pristine lobby to an elevator Willow endured what seemed like an eternity more with Cathy who still tried to pull the sullen and damaged child out of her shell to no avail. After the 30th story Cathy stopped trying, Willow quite content to ignore the peanut like wah wah of the woman. When they reach floor 57 the elevator came to a stop and opened into a small entry way. Knocking on the door Cathy tried one more time to talk her ward into smiling or something.. Willow met the request with a sneer. Seems Caleb was well off.... No wonder he had left her and stain of a child alone to rot. Cathy knocked on the door as Willow adjusted her stance, arms crossing under her budding breasts, that sullen sneer still plastered across her face as the door opened.

 

[Staine]

Caleb glanced at the time again in the corner of his monitor. He had a lot of work to do which thankfully he could do at his own place, being the CEO, but he was expecting her today. His younger sister, Willow. It had been 13 long years since he had left his parents as soon as he had reached the age of 18, the age she was now. He'd emancipated himself, a legal battle that had been all but won the moment he had taken photographs of the bruising and cuts, past hospital visits piling up as evidence too to get him out of there. As soon as he had left and for years afterwards he had tried to get her out of there too. At first he simply wasn't old enough to be entrusted with her by the state and investigators had found no evidence of abuse...why would they when it was him they had abused? In later years they had grown less and less interested and Willow had seemingly just fallen through the cracks. A few years of trying and he had focused instead on his work, his tech company had taken off in a big way and he found himself more and more swamped with meetings and the day to day rigours of running a business.

He felt guilty about that. It had only taken what, 8 years until his efforts had fallen to a mere report attempt every year? 8 years to stop really trying to save his sister from the hell he had grown up in. Eventually they had investigated again when they had learned she had been cutting herself at school. That it had gotten that far at all...what good was everything he had accomplished when he hadn't even taken care of the one person he knew he should? He'd been kept in the loop since then, he knew they had been relieved of her care, she had waited in a foster home while he had applied for custody on the basis of being immediate family. Unsurprisingly, they had found he was more than capable of caring for a teenager now that he was 29 and CEO of a multi-million dollar tech company. He was expecting her today, so when he got a call from the front desk telling him two women were on the way up to his penthouse suite, he knew it had to be her and the social care worker.

He was dressed casually, in designer jeans and a deep indigo shirt. As simple as his attire looked, there was no doubt it cost a fortune, Caleb had fallen into the trap of liking the finer things in life and since he could easily and legitimately afford them he saw no problems in treating himself to the very best life had to offer. When the elevator doors slid open, he was waiting. Standing tall, with his dark black hair stopping a little above his shoulders, ice blue eyes looking down from his 6ft height and muscular, well built stature and polished black shoes he looked intimidating even like this. The only thing about him that didn't look expensive or refined was the black stubble on his chin. He looked at the woman who looked older than him first, a genuine smile on his face as he spoke in a deep voice to her. "Hi, you must be Margret? Thank you for bringing my sister here for me, is there anything I need to sign? I filled in some paperwork already yesterday." She did have a sheet for him to sign and was too busy gawking around at the suite to actually say anything other than to thrust the clipboard at him. He signed it as he looked down at the girl with her. She was small, her clothes were cheap, dark. Gothic...was that what had become of her? Goths, they liked to cut themselves right? He handed the clipboard back to Margret. "Thank you, I can take it from here, you've been a great help." His eyes were on Willow as he spoke. He smiled to her, trying to show her something happy.

"Welcome home, Willow. Don't worry, they can't hurt you anymore okay? You're safe with me now." He reached out, both arms, he wanted to hold her and was having to fight to keep the tears back. He hadn't expected this, to be falling apart once he laid eyes on her, she'd been just a baby when he'd left so it wasn't like he recognised her or anything but knowing she had been through what he had. Sure, she was a little broken now, cutting herself, her very stance was defensive...but he could help fix her, couldn't he? He could be her big brother. He could see Cathy leaving but his eyes never left Willow's.

 

[Bunny]

Willow slowly lifted a brow. Well woopie freaking doo she was safe. It was a little late for that one now wasn't it. Her look changed from a sneer to a look of contempt. She tolerated the hug until he pulled away, she small from never softening. He was a stranger in all accounts expect by blood. She looked inside the glittering apartment that Margret had been so in awe of. It was nice, green eyes flickering about the main room. At least two stories from the looks of it. "Seems you've done well for yourself.." She wanted to throw back at him that she had lived in a rat and cockroach infested shit hole of an apartment. She didn't but it wasn't the fear of hurting him that made her restraint her words but the shame of living some place. "So what now?" Moving further into his penthouse she watched as the sun set on the city, glittering of high rise windows in splashed of orange and pink.

A part of her wanted to ask why he had left her to rot, what had he though would happen.. But honestly? She didn't want to hear his excuses. That's all he'd have. That's all anyone had. Why she had been left there so long, beaten, burned. Why no one had cared before Ms. Mallory. Willow supposed she should be thankful for that interference, at least she was out of that house, but she was having a hard time seeing what difference that would really make. It's not like she could have what she lost back. Innocence, a childhood.. What was Caleb going to give her to make up for leaving her to rot. Buy her affections? He could try and she might let him, but she wasn't going to love him. Use him maybe. That's what others were for. To use and be used. It was the bitter facts of life.

She turned to face him, her skirt swirling as she took him in for the first time. He was tall.. so tall in comparison to her diminutive five foot. It seemed he worked out as well, even under what could only be a stupidly over priced shirt. He was handsome she supposed. He didn't look anything like their darling parents. He looked like her a little, here and there. The tilt of the eyes, they both had fuller lips, though he didn't come close to her full pout. Both their skin was fair. Her hair had never been dark however. She'd had their father's blonde locks.. Which she had changed as soon as she could. Currently a pastel pink and longer than his, but it seemed they both had a fondness for long hair, his shoulder length and hers down past her rear.

Sighing she lifted a brow sardonically as she held a hand out her hand rotating slightly as if prompting him to speak.

 

[Staine]

He didn't know what he had expected, but this wasn't it. If Willow showed any emotion at all towards seeing him after all this time it was anger, disdain. She used few words to ask what happens now and at first he didn't know what to say. What could he say? He could pull up the sleeve of his shirt, show her the scars that had finally prompted him to leave, to seek emancipation and get the hell out of there but what good would that do? Look little sister, I was hurt too. It wouldn't make her wounds go away. He'd heard what they had done to her, and what she had resorted to doing to herself. When he hugged her, she hadn't really reacted, she'd simply gritted her teeth and suffered through it. He sighed softly and took a step back.

"Now, now you live your life. We will find you a school to enrol in, there are several around here that are suitable, we get you settled in and that's...it." He smiled at her sadly. "I know it hasn't been easy, I remember exactly what it was like living with them...but your free now. It probably isn't going to mean much at the moment but let it sink in a little yeah?" He'd ignored her comment about doing well for himself. It was obvious he had money now, he didn't need to throw it in her face even as he wanted to give her everything she could possibly want. He was responsible for her now....he had to give her rules too. He gestured for her to follow him. "This way, let me show you to your room." He strode towards the room he had set aside for her. There was a luxurious bed in it, dresser, walk in closet, en-suite bathroom but not much else. In the corner he had left paint, brushes, dozens of different coloured bedding in piles. He remembered what it was like when he first got away from them, when he had first gotten his own place. It hadn't been much, but it had been his...decorating it how he wanted to had felt freeing. He wanted that for her.

"This is gonna be your room, if you need stuff to fill it we can get that. It's kinda plain...I thought you might like to decorate it yourself, you know?" He laughed nervously...no amount of business meetings, no nothing had prepared him for how he felt right now. He hadn't been this nervous when he had been brokering deals to forward his own stock prices. "There's food in the kitchen, help yourself to any of it you'd like but be careful, I'd rather you didn't start any fires. If there's anything you really need you can call the concierge...but I don't want you leaving here without me until you're settled in, you're my responsibility now." He turned to look down at her, offering her an easy smile, an offering of peace. "You gonna...say something? I've imagined this day a lot you know..."

 

[Bunny]

She held her words as long as she could it wasn't until he asked her to say something.. How he had imagined this day. She turned on him.. her eyes narrow slits of cold jade. "You want me to say something huh? I can tell you this. I am not going to thank you for this!" she stepped in closer and it didn't matter that he towered over her as anger and hurt burned through her very soul, she jabbed a finger into his chest hard. "You're right you knew exactly what they were like. You lived with them. You knew how they stated and I am sure you have the same sort of scars I do, we could fucking compare! Cuts.. Burn marks. YOU KNEW AND YOU LEFT ME THERE!" Tears started to mist in her vision making him blurry. "Did they ever look at you in ways that made your skin crawl?" Their father had begun to as she had grown up.. That was the one thing she was truly thankful for. She had gotten out before the abuse had turned from purely mental and physical to sexual. She had already decided that if it happened she'd just kill herself. There had always been a small glimmer of hope but she wasn't sure she could have come back from that or that she would have wanted to.

Tears flowed freely down her cheeks and she turned away. "So you can play the white knight hero.. but you know that you left me unable to fend for myself with monsters. You did nothing to keep me safe. This is all far too little.. far to late.. We both grew up in hell, the only difference is I didn't leave you alone it it. You left me" Shaking her head she angrily dashed the wetness from her eyes. Her voice thick as she spoke again. "So save your excuses. They don't mean shit. You knew. You did nothing. End of the fucking story. Now leave me alone."

 

[Staine]

Caleb didn't know what he had been expecting her to say to that but her outburst...it hurt. He listened to her, to what she had been through and how she clearly felt that he had abandoned her there. He could have tried to argue against it, he could have told her how much he had tried to get her taken away from them. All the visits from CPS had been his doing, he had called them pretty much every month at first, he had done everything he could but the system hadn't cared, she hadn't been abused yet. As time went on he had still tried, but they had gotten clever at hiding it and the more times they investigated with no result the less inclined they seemed to be to investigate again. In the end, it had taken a lot more effort just to get them to check in but he had still been calling. He should have still done more, he knew that. "Willow, I...okay. I'll leave you alone." Despite how big he was, how strong he looked the tears were shining in his crystal blue eyes, threatening to form. He turned and left her there in the room. He didn't know what he could do to make it better for her, what would fix a girl who had been abused for so long? Nothing...there was nothing he could do for that so he did what he always did, he worked.

Time passed. Each morning he would make breakfast and leave it on the table for her. Sometimes she would come for it, sometimes she wouldn't. He would talk to her as little as possible, he had gotten her a private tutor so she wouldn't have to face a new school unless she wanted to...he hadn't really taken her out to the stores to shop yet but he had clothes brought in for her. What she did with them, he didn't know or care. Generally, he tried to give her the space he knew he had needed over the next couple of months. As time passed, he grew used to having her there even if he didn't see her much, nothing in his life really changed apart from her occasional presence.

 

[Bunny]

That night Willow cried into her brand new pillow on her brand new bed. All new.. all shiny. He had left her as asked. He hadn't tried to explain and that she was thankful. Nothing he could have said would have changed her mind.

The days at first passed in a blur but in time she began to notice small things. He made her breakfast each morning. She knew it was him because one day she woke early to find out if it was like a maid or something. But no, it had been Caleb standing barefoot in his shiny kitchen in plaid pajama pants cooking her eggs and bacon. At first suspicious she had stopped eating it.. And watched each afternoon as he cleared it up. No comment nor anger.. perhaps a tinge of sadness. But the next morning and the morning after that there was always breakfast hot and waiting for her.

There were other things too. He bought her new clothing. A mix of the things she would more than likely want as it ran to black and gothic but he also tried to splash in color. At first she had found it annoying but lately she found more amusing and cute even. He was constantly doing small unobtrusive things never pushing but constantly and almost reassuringly there.

It took her almost half a year before she was ready to talk. She had been shy and scared to ask him if he would.. And she took what he said and told her and left without saying much. She told him she needed to think and like before he had let her go.

Willow rubbed her eyes and stared up at the darkness of her ceiling. It was early morning according to the neon glowing numbers of her alarm clock. She couldn't sleep. She could only think of what Caleb had told her. She had been ready to listen. He had tried to help her.. But no one was going to give a three year old to a seventeen year old... She knew that. She had likely known it before but hadn't cared. She had been... unfair. And all those visits from CPS had been him. Looking back on it, with the information she now had it was like he.. had almost never left. Whispering into the darkness "He did try and I was such an ass... He is still trying. Maybe... Maybe I should cut him some slack. Try.. back."

Laying there she let her thoughts wonder, and when she heard the soft sound of movement in the kitchen she slipped from bed. Dressed in an over sized tee-shirt and little else she padded from her room to where Caleb was starting to gather what looked like the ingredients for pancakes. Taking a deep breath she smiled slightly. "I really like chocolate chip pancakes, if we have the stuff for them? You know like what we used to get from Moe's" It was her olive branch to him.

 

[Staine]

Since almost nothing had changed in his life besides getting her the things she needed, Caleb's routine hadn't much changed either. Almost 6 months had passed since she had come to live with him, he still did the same things, he still passed time the same way albeit with less dates since he liked to stay on hand in case she needed anything. His dating life could wait until she was older, a tiny sacrifice considering everything she had been through. He had been surprised when she had come to him to talk just a week ago, and he had explained as best he could everything he had tried to do to get her out of there. It hadn't been enough, he could have done more. Hell, even breaking the law would have been acceptable, he had money to hire somebody to take her, to beat the shit out of their parents, even kill them perhaps, but he hadn't. He'd had the talk, he'd told her everything and then he had let her go again. Life continued on after that, he continued to do what he always did until one day when he was making pancakes in the morning.

He didn't turn to face her at first until she spoke, then his head snapped up like she had slapped him. She never really did this, she never spoke to him. "From Moe's?" He smiled, he hadn't smiled at her yet since that day she'd arrived but now he did, chuckling quietly to himself. "I'm surprised you remember that, you were pretty young at the time. Did you still go after I left?" He was already moving to the cupboard to find the chocolate chips he had and pulled them out, placing the box down. "I can make you those, just pull up a seat at the table. Do you want anything with them? Syrup?" He was wearing the usual pyjama bottoms and nothing else, the green and blue plaid he liked and the burn mark on his left arm where their mother pressed the iron against him when he had snapped at her was visible. It had been what had finally prompted him to leave, he had been fighting back and he was sure that one of them was going to kill him. He hoped they hadn't gotten that far with Willow yet, he hoped she hadn't fought back as much.

He put in as many chocolate chips as he could as he made the pancakes, humming to himself happily. For whatever reason she wanted to come talk to him today or at least have breakfast with him and he wasn't going to waste this opportunity to spend some time with her. "So I never did check on your room, have you painted it yet? I figured it's yours so I'd give you space to do what you liked with it you know? If you have we can move the leftover paint out, make it feel more like home?" His tone was hopeful as he set the plate of pancakes down in front of her with a bottle of syrup before collecting his own. Finally he brought glasses and a bottle of orange juice he had delivered every morning and sat down opposite her.

 

[Bunny]

It was hard, trying to put herself out there like this, but it was no less than he had tried to do.. And now that she seemed ready he was willing to try again. Careful to hide her own scars her eyes lingered for a moment on his. Biting her lower lip she shook her head some. "I think.. A little but there was a picture of us in an album.. I guess from a time where they were trying for normal. I still have it if you'd like to see it later?" Shrugging softly she headed toward the table as asked. "A few times.. normally after a really bad beating" She let her words trail off as she curled into the seat.

"Pancakes alone are fine and yes.. please" She watched him move about and smiled slightly at the crazy amount of chocolate chips he poured into the batter. He was handsome, scars and all. Willow was surprised he was single.. but she hadn't heard a female in the house nor did he ever leave for any real length of time. He always seemed to be there just in case she needed him. Pushing a soft pink curl from her face she tilted her head. "So what exactly do you do.. You're home like well.. All the time" She gave a little chuckle hands hidden beneath the table in her lap, one finger running over a scar repeatedly. "And not really.. I can really do anything I want?" She had been honestly a little afraid to really make it hers.. Scared that at some point he would just get sick of her.

Sitting up a bit straighter as he placed a stack of pancakes before her and a bottle of real syrup. Teeth worried her lower lip and she leaned into the table some, pouring them both a glass, giving him a shy smile. "Thank you.. for breakfast.. for well like the past six months" A nervous giggle was offered before she turned to the task of eating.

 

[Staine]

Caleb smiled, trying to put her at ease and ignore the pounding of his own heart as he poured some syrup over his own pancakes, something he had grown to enjoy. "I'd like that, maybe there are some good memories to be had after all. I kind of resigned myself to having to maybe make my own one day." He spoke quietly as though too loudly would scare her away which was the last thing he wanted to do. He let her trail off as she mentioned the beating and chuckled when she asked what he did. "I started a tech company. One thing our parents never stopped me doing was going to school and I spent as much time as I could there so I learned a lot really. Then when I left I could focus my studies on what I wanted. Just computer software really, I can program myself a little but I'm better at running the business than coming up with the products...and I can do it all from home too, or most of it. I go in for a few meetings a month, a lot of it I do over the internet or I delegate."

In truth he would do better at the office for sure, but he didn't want to leave her alone too long, he already hated having to leave as much as he did. What if something happened? What if she tried to hurt herself? Even when he left he had cameras in the main rooms of the suite and had forced himself to resist the temptation to have one in her room just to make sure she didn't do anything foolish. He laughed and nodded. "Yes, anything you like. Throw the paint over the walls and let it run down for all I care, just make it yours." He smiled and took a bite of his pancakes. "Nobody is going to take it from you, I promise." He liked when she giggled, the noise was musical and more than that, it was happy. Whatever had changed, right now she wasn't his angry, sullen sister, she was just a happy teenage girl. "You're welcome. I didn't know what you'd like so I mostly just made extra of what I was having so it wasn't a big deal really. While we are on that note..." He hadn't offered her anything yet really, he hadn't wanted to try and buy her off, but now that she was talking to him...

"If there is anything you want, like food, or clothing, or anything at all really just ask. I can leave you my card if you wanna shop yourself, or get you a prepaid one if you need the privacy..." He sighed. "Sorry, I'm not good at this. What I mean is, you don't have to be shy about asking. I know you didn't have much, and you should finish schooling without having to worry about clothes and stuff and paying for it all. It's the least I can do for...leaving you there."

 

[Bunny]

She ate her pancakes as she listened. Willow knew he was truing and a small part of her mind said this was too much.. too soon, but she pushed past it. It would be okay, it had to be right? "You haven't made any yet, you've had thirteen years, whatcha waitin' for?" She lifted both brows as she shoved a large bite of pancake into her mouth, chewing thoughtfully. She didn't know much about what he was talking about. Like sure she knew base idea, but just that so she just nodded. She hadn't poured herself into school.. Maybe it would have been better if she had? Shaking her head she looked back to him. It didn't matter now much anyway.

Willow blinked at him as he basically read her mind. She nodded and took a sip of juice. She could plan something out. Something just hers. She liked to draw.. or she had. She hasn't done it in a while. She could give it a go. She looked back up as he sighed only having half listened for a few moments. She bit her lower lip and nodded. "If it's okay with you I don't think I'd want anyone to go with me..." She didn't say it out loud but it was clear she was embarrassed. her eyes fell to the burn mark on his forearm. Looking back up she blushed and looked down at her plate where she was pushing around some pancake. "Mr. Thomism will be here soon.. I should get ready"

 

[Staine]

Caleb laughed as he chewed his food and thought about what she had said. "I have a few, I guess. Some nice ones, with girlfriends or friends, I've had some fun you know, but work seemed more important. I could relax a little I guess..." He didn't quite catch on that she was teasing him maybe and not criticising him but he often found that he felt he had to compete or do better than other people to prove himself. Their parents had done a lot of psychological damage on him too. "No time for it right now anyway, first I want to make sure you're doing okay, that you're on the right path." He smiled, then shook his head. "Sorry if that's overbearing. I have a control freak attitude sometimes, I don't want to be too pushy with you." Finishing his pancakes, he nodded. "Yeah, that's okay, if you want to get your own stuff that's fine, I can sort out a prepaid card for you. Just get anything you need alright?"

She seemed embarrassed but he let it die out, he didn't want to tease her, they clearly didn't have that kind of relationship yet and if he ever wanted it to get that far he had to have patience. "Of course, your tutor, I forgot. How is that going? Are you ready for that yet?" He started to clear away his plate, reaching out to grab hers when she seemed done. "Okay, you go get ready for him, I should get dressed too huh? I'll be in my office if you need anything, anything at all okay? I don't plan on going anywhere unless I have to." Clearing away the dishes he left her to herself while he cleaned them and then went back to work as usual. It wasn't like everything he did was work anyway, sometimes he was just playing video games too but he couldn't just let her know that, he was meant to be the workaholic after all.

 

[Bunny]

"It's going okay. He is pretty nice.." She nodded and rose from the table. Offering another soft thank you before vanishing into her room to get ready for her day.

That day was the turn of a page for them. She joined him most morning for breakfast. For a while they ate with little conversation and I'm time they became warmer and friendly to each other. About a month later she invited him to see what she had decided to do with her room. In one corner near her bed there was a tree in the fashion of a weeping willow, the leaves reaching the ceiling and the roots pained on the floor. From there a dark fantasy landscape was pained. On the longest wall was a waterfall that seemed to fall into a large body of water. The ceiling was a swirling and brooding galaxy. Small touches here and there. Her bed seemed to be painted to be apart of that main tree. She had started working on it that first day and it had taken her that long to finish. She had been shy when he had been floored and embarrassed by the praise. It only served to strengthen the fledgling bond they were building.

In time she asked to go to school again. tired of being cooped up at home with just her tutor. She wanted to be with other kids, he naturally agreed. Helping and supporting her to the best of his ability. He was always there for her and she tried her best to make him proud. He put in so much she wanted to give him something back. Even if it was just doing her best. But like in all of life nothing could last forever. Willow had forgotten how cruel kids could be. She had been in school two months when the pressure of others, the work load all came crashing down on her. It was too much and she was drowning silently. She just needed to escape again. Just.. for a little while.

She waited until she knew Caleb was going to be gone for work. She needed to do this, needed the release.. She hadn't cut herself since coming to live with him. He made it near impossible, always home and vigilant about it, but he was relaxed now. He went to work a little more regularly. She just... needed to escape for a little while, make it all fade away.

Willow had bought a razor with the card he had given her on her way home from school. She knew he'd be gone till later, he had told her as much that morning. Had encouraged her to hang out with friends. What friends... She had given some noncommittal answer. Laying in bed naked, she shivered against the dark purple comforter. She knew he would be mad if he found out, but she needed to feel it. That quick sharp bite, the endorphin rush. She didn't know any other way to get it than from the razor.

Pale and small she wasn't much to look at. She knew it. Her body was still struggling to 'bloom' fully, her hips had just begun to flower out from her slender waist. Her things and ass had come in well enough, supple and full. Her breasts were still lacking, it was one of the ways she was teased at school. One of the many. In a halo of her own pink hair she spread her legs and bit her lower lip, the edge of the blade against her right thigh "Please.. please.. pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease" was whispered in almost a mantra. With a quick intake of breath she slicked just bellow an older scar. She moaned low and closed her eyes as she let the rush of pain fill her body and carry her away. Just.. one more. Another small cut followed it just below and she moaned again, eyes rolling back in her head.

 

[Staine]

The next few months had been more pleasant, they were talking now. It wasn't a great deal, it wasn't like they were close but the little things. They enjoyed breakfast together often, he had gotten her the credit card she could use, pre-paid with the statement going to her and not him so that he didn't see what she bought, the privacy he felt was important, the freedom to be herself. She'd rewarded him by actually wanting to go back to school, showing dedication to studying and had even showed him what she had made of her room once she had finished. It was a beautiful sight too, he hadn't imagined she could be so good at painting but it was clear she had put a lot of time and effort into it and he loved it, had heaped on the praise for it. He was proud of her, and with her birthday approaching soon he was wondering what to get her. She would be seventeen and the first birthday he would get to spoil her on. That didn't matter today though, because something was on his mind. She had been acting strange, squirrely even and had seemed a little sad but when he had asked what was wrong she had brushed it off. He might not know her as well as he would like yet, but something was up so of course he wanted to surprise her with something good.

He'd bought her several new supplies, art supplies which hadn't come cheap but would be perfect for a burgeoning young artist like herself to start up on and had been quietly converting one of the many rooms of his suite into a studio for her. Today he had left work early, she had seemed particularly down and he had wanted to show her exactly what he had gotten for her, it seemed like a no brainer to cheer her up. The room had an easel in the centre, cabinets filled with painting supplies, pencils, charcoal, clay, putty, everything she could need to let her creative side loose. Stepping out of the elevator into the suite he knocked on her bedroom door before opening it, like he had done several times in the past few months as they grew closer to one another. The sight that greeted him wasn't exactly what he had expected. "Willow, I'm home, come have a look at what I've been working o..." He froze. The first thing he noticed was she was naked and mid sentence he could feel himself starting to blush as he paused in the doorway. After a few seconds had passed he realised he was still staring and he backed away through the door, closing it behind him.

"Willow, I'm sorry, I..." He was apologising when his mind caught up to what he had seen. Yes, she was naked but she wasn't masturbating like most teens would have been, he could see it clearly now, the red lines, the thin trails of blood, the razor she had in her hand. His tone was a little stricter as he started up again. "Willow...get some clothes on, get out here. We need to talk." His hand was on the doorframe, he didn't plan on going anywhere till she was out, he didn't even plan on letting her stall either. "If you're not out in 3 minutes I'm coming back in...I know what I saw in there, I know what you were doing..." He'd known she had done it in the past but she was out of there now, wasn't she? She didn't need to do this anymore...

 

[Bunny]

Willow was a little too lost to hear the knock, off in her own little world. It was his voice that pulled her back to reality with a sick feeling in her stomach. He wasn't supposed to be back yet.. Swearing under her breath she was already moving to get dressed, it wasn't until his tone changed that she knew he knew. There was a twisting pile of snakes low in her stomach and she was starting to feel ill. She threw on a pair of soft shorts and a tank top as quickly as she could. She didn't know what to do with the razor so she left it on her night stand as she exited her room.

She had never heard him use that sort of tone with her. It was.. almost fatherly. Her hands twisted before her, standing just outside her room. She wasn't hiding anything right now, far too anxious. She had scars along her arms, self inflicted and not. Small little round burn marks from cigarettes one near her wrist that looked like smiley face from a lighter. one could even tell the difference from her own work and her parents when it came to the cutting. Hers were controlled and constrained where those from her parents were at odd angles. While the cuts on her inner thighs were hidden, two small trails of blood slowly crept down her skin. "Caleb.. I" She didn't finish her thought. She didn't know how or what to tell him. She felt ashamed.

 

[Staine]

Caleb was waiting for her when she emerged. Far from the usual long sleeved things she wore, she wasn't covering herself as much this time and he felt a pang of guilt as he saw the scars thought it was clear not all of them were made by their parents. They were never so careful as some of these were, they didn't care that much not to do damage, they never had. She was wringing her hands almost, looking down at her feet like she could hide that from him, like she had to. They weren't close enough yet that she didn't realise she didn't have to hide anything from him, or be ashamed. His tone didn't let up as he reached down and his hand touched her hair, just patting gently. "Willow...you know you can't do that anymore. I know you have in the past, and I can't judge you for how you coped but not now...not under my roof." While he still had the stricter edge to his tone it was soft enough for her to hopefully realise she wasn't really in trouble. Taking his hand from her head he used it to lift her chin, to make her look up at him. "Come with me, we need to talk."

He had planned to show her the room he had set up for her but it didn't quite seem like the right time for it anymore so instead he led her towards the main room of the suite where he would often watch television or just relax with a book. The luxurious leather sofa, a cream colour, was where he sat and pulled her down to sit by him. With how she was dressed he could actually look at her scars now and he didn't hide that he was doing just that. "Tell me what happened. Tell me why you feel you still need to cut. I can get you a therapist to talk about it with if you'd prefer, but don't worry okay? You're not in trouble...but you won't do that again, not here. Not anywhere, I won't allow it." He smiled softly. "I've tried to give you freedom, maybe I've given you a little too much if you're buying razor blades. How often do you do this? Why? What do you get from it?"

 

[Bunny]

When his hand touched her hair Willow flinched. She wasn't use to contact from others that didn't hurt or lead to hurting. But the soft petting was.. nice.. or might have been had she not been so freaked. She felt his hand leave her hair and instead she found her chin forced upwards, it was gentle but persistent. Her face was scared, it was written along each delicate line of it. Her green eyes misty and wide, like a bunny caught in a snare.

She was lead by the hand to the living room where he sat and pulled her again gently beside him. She curled into the couch, legs underneath her. She heard his words and what he said. They needed to talk. Her hands in her lap she rubbed the smiley face burn over and over like a worry stone. She was silent for a long moment before she spoke. She still didn't look at him but just past him. "I started.. because it was something I could control.. Something they did that I could do." She knew that is why she had started. She had thought if she hurt herself maybe.. maybe they wouldn't. It hadn't worked out in her favor as it didn't seem to make much of a difference.

Sighing she dug her nails into her palm and looked up at him. "I haven't been doing it. Not since moving.. And.. I don't know how to explain it.. The feeling.. The.. almost rush. I helps me.. get away." Willow had looked away as she tried to explain why. She didn't know how to explain it better. "School.. has.. been hard. The classes are much harder but I am.. I am trying my best." Her words trailed off. It was harder to tell him she was being bullied. She felt in a way she deserved it. Much like shad had when their parents had hurt her. She must of deserved it.. Why else would someone do such a thing? Her last word were almost whispered. "It hurts.. But I.. like it in a way.." It helped her feel alive.

 

[Staine]

He didn't dare look away from her even for a second as she spoke, he wouldn't let her think that he wasn't listening, that he wasn't there for her. Whatever the reason for this cutting was, he could find a way to solve it, to make her stop because this wasn't the way, this couldn't be the way to fix...anything. It was dangerous for one thing, he had heard of how one slip with the blade could end a life, or it could lead to illness...he didn't know enough about it to know which illness but he knew it could lead to something and that was the point. When she did start, he listened, and he nodded. He understood that at least. "I see...I get that. That's why I did my schoolwork, because it was in my hands. It's why I did a lot of things, but this..." He sighed softly and reached out, laying his hand on her shoulder.

He could see her dig her nails into her palm and heard her explanation. "Stop that, no hurting yourself right in front of me." His tone had gone from scared to commanding in an instant, talking to her like he would to an employee, then he was back down to soft again. "I see, school...school is tough and you want that release of endorphins. I know that feeling, but this, Willow..." He sighed softly. "This is dangerous, Willow. You could really hurt yourself and I have only just gotten you back. I won't lose you again...You're never going to get rid of me, not like this." He suddenly pulled her into him. He didn't care that she might not want to hug, he needed it. He needed to hold her. "There are other ways you can get that release, maybe when you're a little older and I don't have to have somebody killed, but cutting isn't it, and until then...until then maybe just come to me when you feel the need and we will watch a movie, have ice cream...fucking hell, I'll even have a drink with you once in a while if you promise not to cut. I love you, little sister, I'm not going to let that happen again...never."

 

[Bunny]

The hand on her shoulder was looked at but she didn't shrug him off or ask him to remove it. She flinched when he told her to stop and it took effort to uncurl her fingers. The problem was pain.. hurt.. as stupid as that was to think let alone say. But she did liked it. She didn't know if she could just.. stop. She constantly did small things, she knew it. It's how she had coped with not cutting until now. Nails into her skin, or the repetitive sting of a hair bad on her wrist. The hug was very unexpected and she was stiff at first but unlike the first hug he had given her she softened in his arms and even hugged him back for a moment.

Pulling back, she looked up from under her lashes at him. "Why when I am older?" Willow's head tilted a rush of pick hair falling to one side with the movement. She took a slow breath and bit her lower lip, not hard but more in thought before speaking again. "I don't know if I can stop Caleb.. Like.. like my nails a moment ago I constantly do.. small things. Sometimes it helps clear my head like then.. others it takes the edge off.." She was being honest.. as honest as she could be even though she was scared of his reaction. "It's.. like a build up.. an ache or a need that needs re..release"

 

[Staine]

He could feel how stiff she was when they hugged, but it wasn't like before and she relaxed a little in his arms. That was all the prompting he needed, he sat back but pulled her closer with him, keeping an arm around her to hold her into his side. The contact was comforting...she was here in his arms so surely she couldn't be anywhere else, she couldn't be being abused at that very moment, or hurting herself. She wasn't in any danger as long as she was with him. He heard her question and didn't know if he should answer, but he knew he couldn't keep things from her either. That wouldn't help. "When you're older because...it's sexual. And I'm not going to let you do that kind of thing under my roof at your age. I don't trust...boys. I don't trust them with you and even if I did I wouldn't trust them with...this." He squeezed her shoulder even as he still held her.

He sighed as she went on. If she really couldn't stop he couldn't hold that against her, he had needed to find his own way of coping just like her, and in the end it had been something similar. He'd tried pain himself even, he enjoyed it, he fully understood how the endorphins and the rush felt, the release she spoke of but in the end he had settled on something else. In the end, the control had been more important for him. He ran his business, he controlled how things went, and it extended into most corners of his life as something he wasn't willing to give up. It was starting to slip into his relationship with her too, even now he was forbidding her from finding her own release, wasn't he? "I see...well maybe...I could loan you something and you could try using that on yourself. It isn't cutting, it might take a little more effort but it won't scar, and you'll still get the release of pain. Does that sound...better?" He was trying to find a compromise.

 

[Bunny]

Willow let herself lean into him because one it didn't seem like he was going to let her go and two... it felt nice. He was warm. She shifted a little, legs stretching out a bit further so she could lean her head on his shoulder. Sexual? What could be sexual and be pain. She flipped through what she knew about sex which was very limited and came up with nothing. "That's.. fair. But what is it?" She wondered if he would tell her or just make her drop the subject. She guessed worse case she could look it up. A simple google of Sex and Pain should illuminate whatever he was talking about.

She looked up at him from her angle and blinked at him, her jade eyes large and owlish. She knew it for what it was.. and nodded. Biting her lower lip. She looked down at her hands and frowned. She felt like she was letting him down. She couldn't help it though. She had tried to stop just before going to school but found she couldn't get though the days without. She needed just a little every day or it drove her mad. It was like an itch that needed to be scratched.

 

[Staine]

Caleb laughed nervously. "Well...you have to promise not to freak out if I show you right? I promise you're safe with me, Willow." He was smiling but his heart was racing. The only people who ever saw what he was about to show her were women he brought back to play with and to show it to Willow was the only thing he could think of to help, for two reasons. One, he needed to find her something that wouldn't cut her but she could use for pain, and second he could show her that she wasn't the only one who had to find a coping technique. He had to do the same thing. "Just try not to judge me okay? You found your way of coping and I found mine. Come on." He reached down and took her hand, leading her to the far corner of the penthouse suite where his bedroom was, then into it. Past the bed in the rather normal looking, if not spartan room was another door. This one had a lock, and he reached into his pocket for his keys to open it. Opening the door, he gestured for her to go inside. The room had no windows, no light of it's own, and once she had stepped into the darkness he hit the light switch.

The room lit up, the walls themselves backlit racks holding toys, gags and canes, crops and paddles, restraints. On the ceiling was a rack, a st andrew's cross which could be lowered down, there were other things up there too, pulleys and pristine, polished chains, benches of steel and black padded leather, cages with black iron bars, stocks and even a fucking machine. At one side of the room was a huge four poster bed with black rubber velvet sheets and drapes around it, on the wall behind it a huge mirror reflecting the entire room. Dressers to either side of the bed and shelving held mannequin heads which each held gags and hoods and blindfolds...another door to the side led to a walk in closet with all manner of leather outfits, latex gear. It was clear that a vast amount of money and time had gone into this room, the largest in the suite by far. He lifted his hand to the back of his neck, grinning sheepishly and hoping his younger sister wouldn't freak out at the sex dungeon he had spent years putting together. "I was thinking I could loan you something from here I guess, something safer than a razor. If it's pain you want, well, I'm not unfamiliar with why somebody would enjoy that kind of thing, or the release it can provide, little sister, I just went a different way with it than you did, that's all."

 

[Bunny]

Blinking she watched him rise from the couch and frowned softly. She understood he was trying to soothe her but at the same time it was a little worrying. Just a tad.. a smidge. Nodding slowly she allowed him to pull her to her feet. She followed him silently into his room. It was the first time she had been inside his room. Looking about she tilted her head. She didn't seem to have a lot of stuff to decorate his room.

This thought was halted when he stopped before a locked door. Another frown formed as she look at him, gesturing her inside. She trusted him but this was like serial killer stuff. She walked past him into the darkness. The room was cooler than his bedroom had been and she felt goosebumps rise along her arms. Shivering some she shielded her eyes from the sudden light. What she had expected she wasn't sure...

Willow's mouth fell open as she looked around. Some where in the back of her mind a little bell went off. Sex dungeon! She turned to look at him and lifted a brow.. She tried for teasing as she spoke. "I guess I can understand why you'd be worried.." She moved a little further in looking at all the toys he had. "But I mean.. You caught me naked on my bed with a razor so lets call it even, yeah?" Her voice was distracted as she trailed a finger over a the leather handle of a cat o nine tails. She didn't know what it was but it looked like it would sting. She debated asking for it but, she knew he'd prefer if she went for something that could inflect less damage. Call it a hunch. "So.. how is yours.. different?"

 

[Staine]

If he'd been nervous when she had come to breakfast with him all those months ago then he didn't know what to call how he was feeling now. The suspense was maddening...he was half suspecting she would simply flee, run from him and never look back, not that he would let her but this was risky. One call to CPS and he would be in the same boat as his parents for sure and he hadn't laid a single hand on her. It would be darkly ironic...but thankfully after gawping around she looked back at him and raised her eyebrow, and he even managed a chuckle, his eyes lighting up mischievously. "Wouldn't say it's even, I'm hardly naked and I don't plan on being, but I get your point." He watched her look around the room while he walked in himself, smiling as he picked up one of the toys. It wasn't anything dangerous, or rather it wasn't as dangerous as a razor blade but maybe it would do for her. He smiled as she asked her question, he had been expecting it after all.

"Mine is different because after I tried what you do, taking the pain, I found I liked it more on the other end of it. I like hurting others more than I like being hurt." His voice was low as though he didn't want them to be overheard. He hadn't told anybody this before, or explained it at least. Sure, they knew, how could they not know when he brought them here, but he was self taught and he didn't discuss it. He learned how to enjoy what he did safely and that was all he had needed. He approached her and reached for her arm, grabbing her wrist and holding her arm up in front of him. In his hand was a wartenberg pinwheel which he pressed against her arm, not too lightly but enough for the points to dig in as he ran it gently up towards her elbow. "I guess I'm a bit of a sadist, I get my release that way. Consensually, of course!" He laughed, he didn't know why he felt he had to add that last part. "How does this feel? Not too dangerous, not too sexual either here on your arm. You can control the pain easier and you don't cut yourself." He pulled it back a little, then placed it in her hand. "It's not your only option, and nothing dangerous, a lot of this stuff you need to use safely and I doubt I'll be around to supervise."

 

[Bunny]

She couldn't help but think that it was a bit of a shame when he said he wouldn't be naked and then blushed at the though averting her face from him. She knew he was her brother.. but sometimes it was harder to picture him as such. Guardian sure, but brother? Maybe someday. She could hear him move behind her as he spoke. She knew why he said what he did because her first thought was not meant to be unkind but it was like their parent. Consent however would mean the world.. He didn't hurt people without their okay. She.. understood.

Turning towards him as he came closer she watched him curiously as his hand tightened slightly on her wrist. The instrument in his hand looked scary, medical and in a way reminded her of the charm of a razor. Gasping as the little needle like points pressed against her skin. Her eyes lost focus for a moment. She could see the benefit of it, for her uses. Biting her lower lip she shivered, though this time it wasn't from the cold. She could feel the lingering ghost of the points and she smiled at him shyly. "I liked it.." She held it loosely in her hand as she turned away to look at the other things again.

Not too sexual on her arm, but this new world was making her think. He hadn't used it sexually.. but she could. Like he said he wasn't going to be watching her.. Nodding she curled the pinwheel to her chest. "Can I use this then?" She blushed as she asked.