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Sep 23, 2019
“A time is coming when men will go mad, and when they see someone who is not mad, they will attack him, saying, 'You are mad; you are not like us.”

― St. Antony the Great


Now look. Some people don't consider the things I'm about to say as valid, the things that I see as real, and the stuff that I hear as true. But if you want my advice- the best thing you can really do is hold onto what little truth the ones from beyond tell you. They've let me hear all sorts of shit; from wildfires to waves passing over the rough sand of a common man's beach. Felt things like the warmth of a fuzzy blanket, and the enduring love of my now deceased mother's embrace...all from within the walls of a sound proof padded room, and in world's most restraining straight jacket anyone could ever tie on. Truth be told though, I'm kind of used to it. I've been stuck in Ern Creek Meadows for nearly seven years, for what you might ask? I'm not even sure myself. Sometimes I just get lost from the flood of information that my mind is receiving on a daily basis, and my connection to the physical world is washed over by the metaphysical. One thing does remain for sure though...I fucking hate this place.

"You awake?" the sound of a gruff middle aged woman resonated from beyond the steel framed door of own little adult sized play pen. Her knuckles made the echoing intrusions from the outside get on my nerves- and when my senses get interrupted, so do the things I'm receiving from my special friends. I hate when we get interrupted.

"Mhm...." I replied back groggily as I rolled over on my side, the sound of of my bound body being muffled completely under the padded floor. I curled up in fetal position as best as I could, and let out an aggressive puff of air through my nostrils. Next thing I knew, my most dreaded part of the routine started...morning care.

"Alright buddy, I'm coming in-" she warned me before she lifted the locks. Moments later, the creaking and deafening tone of the steel door could be heard as she swung it open. My care taker was a bit over weight, but really nice and understanding. She was a dirty blonde, and had mole underneath her left cheek. Her eyes were also a bright blue, and matched well with the uniform she had on. As she approached me, she knelt down slowly, and began to free me from the locks of my straight jacket. As I heard the clicking of each lock, my day was slowly starting to get better. "There you go...all opened up. I'll go ahead and let you stretch for a moment." she told me before she pulled the slipper down, and slid it down my back. By now, my body was now completely free. I looked down at my red wrists, and brought my hands just a few inches away from my face before grasping them, and then wiggled my toes. After doing that, I rolled over on my stomach, and pushed myself off the ground....You should've seen my face, I was always a bit giddy to get out of that damn thing. Before long, I did a realllly long back stretch, even going as far to my ankles- I was always this flexible, most flexible kid in the neighborhood where I grew up at as well. After hearing the cracks along some misadjusted spines, and the adrenaline of morning antioxidants surging through my head, I rolled my neck around to crack it a little as well. After I had done that, my caretaker tapped my shoulder, which prompted me to turn around.

"Do I really look that bad?" I squinted into a mirror that she held up with her left hand. I had on a white jumpsuit that had four digits. '7571', engraved on the front of my left shoulder. My face was unshaven, and I looked like big foot's mama. My hair was darker than volcanic ash, and my eyes were about as green as a stoner's backyard. Eyes were much more terrible though....I really shouldn't be staring at lights...I really love lights, had to fight for them to keep my light on twenty four seven. It was the thing that kept me and my friends safe...we weren't really fond of the dark and what was in it.

"If you want you can shave, but you gotta brush your teeth first." she informed me as she grabbed my wrist, and led me outside like a little child, even though I was much taller than she was...

"What if I don't want to brush my teeth?" I fought against the system.

"You got to Charlie, you got to- Don't you want privileges?" though the system always found a way to play those that were in it....

"Fine..." I replied with a hefty sigh as she lead me down the narrow white tiled hall ways past the rooms of countless other patients. This was place was full of crazy folk, but I know damn well I ain't crazy...which is why I shouldn't be here in the first place.

The walk was normal, thankfully. For once I thought I was going to have a day full of good interactions, and my good visions from my friends I walked down the hall. Things around me began to get odd. Reality started to warp, and I was beginning to become disconnected from everything around me. Shit went dark...shit went dark real quick. Heard things telling me that what happened was my fault. That I deserved to be in here for what I did. Calling me a fucking monster- What a bunch of hypocrites am I right?! These fucking things calling me a monster? If only you could see them...If only you could see them. They're the ones that got me locked in this place. The visions these assholes give me are much different from the visions of my friends...they only serve to ruin what little happiness I have left, and distort my reality so that I can't tell what's going on. The door at the end of the hall had split into four sections, and everything looked like it was jittering...every time the world around me jittered, I could hear them taunting me in their indecipherable language. I couldn't speak it- but I knew damn well what they were saying. Same shit every time. "Charlie" they would call my name. "You know what you did" they'd repeat over and over...and over! Give me a break....

(Author's notes)

To all my first time readers, thank you for stopping by. I came up with this idea on the whim, and when I went over it on my just stuck with me. I intend to update on a daily basis, but if I can't, I apologize in advance. My goal is to give you further immersion into what our protagonist sees. Which is why I''ll do my best to describe things, and provide photos/gifs of Charlie's hallucinations so that you can understand what's going on in his head. All photos/gifs are edited by me. I'd also love to hear some feed back in private messages.

Until next time, Mental will updated later on...possibly later today. - Z


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