Re: Luna ver 3.0
Okay, so Iâ??ve decided to get this out of the way when I have the chance to.
My internet life:
Its very active. Iâ??m on everyday if Iâ??m lucky. But I try not to overdo it. Because of the recent changes in my life, Iâ??ve had more than enough time to be here. However, I force myself to do something productive in my free time so that I wonâ??t be on all day. Iâ??m not someone whoâ??s obsessed with this side of my life, however, I do take it seriously sometimes if I make friends. Or acquaintances, whatever the case may be. Iâ??m a girl that has codes and morals. I forgive people because Iâ??d like people to forgive me. Basically, Iâ??m a do unto others as you want done to you sort of person. At first this particular code was shaky, but now its adamant, and I find it easy not to break most of the time.
I could preach to you about how I wonâ??t do this or that, but for some reason people find it irritating, perhaps because they have done things I refuse to do. People never want to see inside themselves, because something ugly is always lurking there. Even in me. Iâ??m not perfect, never claimed to be, never will be. I still have inner demons, those that I may never be able to correct. But I keep them restrained as best as I can.
Blue moon was pretty good when I first joined. Small but quiet. Nice. It seems that the bigger communities have more chaos and disorder to them. Like Gaia. I was liked for the first monthâ?¦as I recall. But then things went downhill when the scapegoats left. I was called out on being an attention whore. I guess I was, but I was also accustomed to posting at least one or two topics a day. I didnâ??t think much about it, and thatâ??s usually my problem. I donâ??t think about what people would say for this or that, but perhaps it was just because I was never the type to aim or please once I reached eighteen.
Now, I kind of feel like I have to suck up and flirt to get friends. Iâ??m not an interesting person because Iâ??ve never felt the need to be fake. Iâ??m not the type of person to do things like that because Iâ??m a shy person. It used to be cute, now its just annoying. So then I begin to notice that a bunch of people are wellâ?¦theyâ??re not speaking to me. Random Fact About You has been my greatest accomplishment post wise, but I realized I made barely any conversation there. I feel ignored most of the time, because certain people only respond to others, and usually Iâ??m not the one someone speaks to. I could talk about someone dying in my family and no one would even notice.
So does this bother me? Not in particular. Its annoying. Its annoying seeing that none of my regular posters give me a thought. Its annoying getting on everyday and being ignored. Iâ??ve even tried posting and quoting others and still I get nothing.
Its not like I donâ??t know whats going on. A lot of people talk bad about me, including those who claimed they were my friends. Iâ??m sick of one particular person who smiles in my face like heâ??s done nothing wrong.
My thing is, if youâ??ve never even attempted to talk to me, how would you know Iâ??m a terrible person to begin with? Just because someone else tells you so? Just because you saw me in PVP where everyone is fucking childish? Its not like Iâ??m the best arguer in the world, HOWEVER, I have no desire what so ever to even argue back with those who insult my intelligence based on what I give for arguments.
I do make sense, but those who oppose me cover their ears and scream insults at me to make them look good. Anyone can say someone makes no sense. I think the worst thing that keeps me from putting up a decent argument is the lack of a computer. I donâ??t have the luxury of being on one everyday, but my passion for roleplaying keeps me on the PSP.
I will never lower myself as someone thatâ??s only good for entertainment. I refuse to fight back on a constant battle based on attacks upon intelligence, maturity, or wit. In my opinion, people who do that repeat themselves all the time, and the battle would quickly turn into â??ur stupid! no u! no u!â?? and it will be a never ending battle of stupidity. I realize how many people are insecure that they need to establish dominance over others who are considered they bottom feeders of Blue moon, but Iâ??m not the type of person that needs recognition because I know that Iâ??m not what so many others think I am. Iâ??m someone whoâ??s in love with video games and anime, and has a big heart that excepts everyone. And when those people I have accepted turn on me, I get upset and hurt.
Internet or not.
I feel like Iâ??m being treated like dirt. Iâ??ve never felt that way about any site before. Someone can scream at me that I deserve to be treated like this, but what have I done? Not in the past, not in PVP but personally? What have I done to you that you feel the need to shun me outside of PVP? Or talk about me in chat where I canâ??t see you? Why is it that you have to be a certain kind of person in order to gain friends here? Why is it that its so easy to turn on eachother?
I consider posters to be real people. I treat them with respect until theyâ??ve done something that makes me want to make a comment thatâ??s not so nice. Because Iâ??m usually right. And what happens? They bring up that past, call me stupid, immature.
If I asked everyone who hates me why they do, then they would simply all give me the same reason. If you canâ??t write more than one paragraph of something ORIGINAL and not from someone elses opinion of me, you just hate me to hate me. That, in my opinion, is the stupidest thing for someone to do. You could miss out on a good friend or even a soulmate for listening to other peoples opinion. And if you got friends that will judge you based on who you associate yourself with, then those are not real friends.
Iâ??m not asking to be treated like a princess. I just want to be treated like a human being, and obviously thatâ??s not going to happen any time soon.
Iâ??ve tried not to name anyone. I donâ??t want to. However, you all know who you are, and you know what you did. You should be ashamed of yourselves.
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