Changing Relations (Foxxo & miu_meowww)

Having the grid back up and running did wonders to lift his mood. Making due without constant electricity made things difficult, to say the least. It seemed like the entire world came to a halt once the virus struck. At first there was chaos, as could be expected, though not as much as one would have thought. Most men had died, so rioting and other forms of violence weren't prevalent. Generally the chaos sprouted from the immense lack of communications. Everyone left was forced to unplug, so any form of news was hard to come by.

Yet here he was, finally swimming in his pool again. It had become stagnant thanks to the lack of a working pump, but that changed as of last night. Having these privileges back was exciting, and he found himself almost unable to sleep. He finally did manage to sleep, but found himself awake by 7. Rather than laying around in bed he decided to get up and swim, after a cup of coffee of course. Making coffee without electricity required so much work. Just sitting and watching a fresh pot drip away kept him occupied, and brought a much needed smile to his face.

He'd made sure not to wake up Valerie. Things have been, well, strained over the past little while. They weren't talking much, or doing anything else for that matter, even sleeping in the same bed caused him a measure of anxiety most nights. Surprisingly, they both made it through everything that had happened, which he considered a massive blessing. At the same time, the way things had been going, he couldn't help but feel a certain resentment towards her. It made him feel guilty, as none of this was actually her fault, yet he couldn't help himself. However, exerting himself like this so early in the morning helped clear his mind, and he found himself slipping into a zen that he hadn't been able to achieve for quite a while.

After about a half an hour of constant swimming he was beginning to tire, and switched to a slight backstroke. He was still a bit tired, and irritated at how out of shape he'd become. Lying on his back, drifting through the pool was quite peaceful though, and he was able to relax. Being able to achieve this relaxed mood was so difficult nowadays... certain thoughts always had a tendency of creeping back into his head.

oh my god is that coffee?? I marvel, breathing in the wonderful smell - which hasn't filled our home for months now - as I sit up and stretchin bed. The electricity had come on last night and we were told we'd be able to expect it, at least for the time being, intermittently over the next few weeks as the new government continued repairs.

So,i think with giddy excitement, coffee, lights...and that's the pool pump I hear...it's still working... I turn in bed to see if he's awake yet but...hey...he's not here...

"Jack?" I call out, to the bathroom - and the. Again more loudly, into the house,"Jack??"

It's not unusual, him being out of bed before me. I know he likes to do it - he says he needs to do it - to avoid me and the thoughts and feelings and...urges...he might be having, waking up next to me.

Oh, the urges... he's not the only one with those...

Anyway...I don't hear him. He doesn't call back to me. I stretch again - oooo that feels good - and slide out of bed and draw back the shades. Ahh...there he is...swimming...

Our backyard pool is visible from our bedroom and there he is, trying to exercise. I give him credit, after all that's happened, trying to maintain his strength. I know he feels bad over what he's lost, and maybe things like swimming and the other little exercise routines he does for himself make him feel better.

I should go out and see how he's doing I tell myself, as I wrap my thick, blue, terry cloth bathrobe around my body. It's hot in here, it's hot outside, and the extra-big, extra long yellow t-shirt I wear to bed is certainly plenty to keep me warm, but I put on the robe anyway, to cover my curves when I'm around him. its a little frustrating...

I should see how he's doing - I get nervous when he's outside without me - but first I have to get some coffee....mmmmmmm! We have plenty of sugar in our rations but haven't seen milk or cream in weeks. Meh. Black and sweet will do! Mmmmm....

Blowing on the hot coffee in my old "World's Best Editorial Assistant" mug as I step out onto the patio, I smile as I watch him lazily drift on his back across the remarkably clear pool. My man... I think, My precious, precious man...

I take a few more strides, down to the pool, and step with my bare feet down into the cool water of the first pool step...

I continue to drift along, only vaguely aware of my surroundings. It's amazing how blue the sky is today; only small puffs of white dotted here and there. If I didn't have to worry about sinking, falling asleep would be so easy. Regardless, this is the most I've been able to relax in quite a while.

Work had been extremely busy since everything was turned upside down. That was probably for the best however; it kept my mind from drifting too much towards various other thoughts... ones which I've been trying to avoid like a plague. We both have steady careers at the same news agency. Valerie is an editorial assistant, whereas I work as a columnist.

I laugh slightly, remembering the first few days after the incident. We actually had to pull out the printing press! Can you imagine? I was the only one who knew how to even work the damn thing. Not only that, but getting any sort of information was difficult, and spreading the paper was only slightly easier. I felt like some kid from an old novel or movie, standing on a corner peddling the daily. I mean, I make it sound difficult, but in truth it was quite rewarding. Most people were rather traumatized, which makes sense, and extremely eager to eat up even the slightest amount of information.

I was so caught up in these thoughts I hadn't heard Valerie step outside, or noticed her presence. Thinking about her was... awkward? I wanted to think about her, sure, but those thoughts always brought on reactions I'd rather avoid. She's beautiful, and I love her a ton, but I know too well what happens if it goes further than idle daydreaming. I'll try and put in a bit more effort today. I know it's hard on her too, and she's been extremely patient. Thinking about it makes me nervous though. We're the same height now, but how would I feel if things went beyond that? I tell myself it would be alright, that everything would be the same, but I'm all too aware of what's gone on between other men and women.

I'm getting a bit riled up now thinking about it. An increased libido, a massive shift in power... it's a bit too much to handle. What if Val changes? What if I change? This will not only effect us physically, but behaviorally as well, mentally. Our relationship up until this point was based on equality, and that was perfect for us. From what I've seen from other couples though, that equality doesn't last long at all. Mind you, all the other couples I know formed up after the virus hit. Val and I are the only ones around who were together long before any of this happened... will that help preserve our relationship? Can we really continue to abstain like we've doing since then?

I can feel myself drifting even further, more and more distracted by the sky and all these thoughts racing through my head.

one out of two-thousand... I marvel, still watching Jack floating in the pool, maybe even less than that...

Some days - days like this - I can't believe my luck. I mean...I'm lucky to have survived myself; only about one in a hundred women did. But then, also, to have had HIM still alive - what are the chances? I don't know any other couples like us. We're blessed, I know we are...despite what we lost. All that hope, that new little life. But let's not dwell on that. We're alive. We have each other, after this horrible, horrible tragedy that took nearly everyone we knew. We have each other, as this new world is starting to emerge, in fits and starts.

But some days - days like this - I also can't help but feel little pangs of jealousy for those women who...also among the lucky ones...have found themselves a male, a mate, a "husband" after the event. They've all started the process, I've seen some of them, I've talked with a few, and part of me wants....no. Put it out of your head, Valerie Stone.

"Hey handsome," I call out, getting his attention, taking another sip of coffee as I stand in the pool step, "how's the water?"

I over-react to hearing her voice and flail around a bit, quite startled. I hadn't expected her to be up already, though I guess quite a while has passed since I first woke. Looking over at her, she's wrapped up in her fairly large robe. I appreciate that... she really does make every effort to keep me from getting excited. It's unfair of me to expect so much from her, but she seems to understand. She hasn't put up much resistance to the idea of remaining so conservative, yet.

"Oh, hey... I didn't hear you come out. It's quite warm actually, the sun has heated it nicely. Guess it's obvious the electricity came back on." I laugh nervously, trying to lighten things... my mood is often quite dark, but I remind myself I decided to make an effort today.

I always wonder how I should be speaking to her. She's still so warm towards me, but I always wind up feeling awkward, and I know it shows in both my expression and tone. I swim over closer to her, and force a smile to my face. Even in the robe I can see the outlines of some of her changes... and they are quite nice. I need to bury those thoughts though, as much as I don't want to.

"I can see you're enjoying the coffee I brewed earlier... What time is it? I feel like I've been zoning out the past little while. It already seems a bit later in the day." I can feel myself beginning to ramble and halt myself, looking away from her to hide my slight nervous anxiety. That feeling comes up sometimes when she's around.

"Mmm yes omigod the coffee's great..." I gush. He swam a little closer to me, stopping himself at the edge of the shallow end. He's been like that, so cautious and nervous and I understand....but sometimes it just makes me a little sad.

But today he looks like he's having a good day. Maybe it's the electricity? We all have good days, bad days....most of his have been pretty bad, since the sickness. Mine haven't been great either. But when I see him like this - his expression open, warmer than I'm used to most days - it makes my day good too.

Also getting me a little excited - though I'd never admit it - is this anxiety of his I sense in him, when he's around me. I know the effects of the virus on him, how easily turned on he can get. And I know the changes my body's gone through just make things tougher. But - and I'm almost embarrassed to say it - it makes me feel sorta good, this effect I have on him. I know I shouldn't...but...

"It's about...I dunno...eight?" I say, taking a sip of coffee. Time of day has been so much less...important, since the event. We have some battery powered clocks in the house but honestly I don't pay them much mind anymore. "The sun's warm already though, huh?" I continue, as I start to undo my robe. Without running water for showers, a swim sounds sooooo good. "Do you mind if I join you?"

"Ummm, ya... feel free. It is warm, isn't it? I can understand wanting to be in the pool." I begin to panic a little bit when she starts to undo her robe. She probably isn't wearing much underneath it. However, I don't really feel like pointing that out. I need to be more open. I can't expect her to constantly cover herself up like this. It is quite hot today. She should be allowed in the pool, right? Whatever, spending a little while with her should be alright. I can feel my thoughts beginning to race, my head spinning a tad as I think about her taking off the robe, and admiring her curves. Does she know how much something even as simple as this can effect me?

On that note, I turn away, and move back into the middle of the pool. I want to think of something more to say but nothing comes to mind. I also want to look back at her, so badly, but I know that's not a good idea. As soon as I start to get aroused, well, it's difficult to calm myself down again. I can already feel myself beginning to react a bit as I imagine her all wet...

"I, thought it would be later in the day. It feels like I've spent hours out here already." I go back to swimming a bit, hoping to distract myself, but it's taxing, and I'm already quite tired. I can't bring myself to focus on it. Getting myself too excited is out of the question though. I need to avoid that at all costs. But... she's so beautiful. I want it so bad, it's been so long. Gah... she was always so good at reading me. I bet she knows exactly what's going through my head right now. That only makes me feel even more anxious. I quickly dunk my head under the water, hoping to brush all these thoughts away... but they're still there, and getting stronger.

I frown a little as he turns away from me and - after putting my coffee down on the cement edge of the pool - I drop my robe right next to it. I'd go and change into a swimsuit but this works....I've got panties on underneath my long baggy sleeping t-shirt and who's looking anyway?

I step gingerly into the pool, down the three step, getting acclimated to the cool water. "Ahhhh....it feels so nice," I say, as I walk into the shallow end, but he's turned away and now dips under water. The three and a half feet of water comes up past my middle...but a little lower than it used to.

As he swims down to the bottom of the deep end, I have a thought I shouldn't have...I slowly sink down to a crouch to let the water up over my shoulders, feeling my shirt plaster itself to my body, and wait for him to pop back up.

I come back up to take a breath, still facing away from her. I'd only managed to clear my head slightly, but the cold water did feel nice, and helped keep certain things in check.

Thinking about it, the pool did feel bigger. Everything felt bigger. I hated having these thoughts. They always reminded me that I was a few inches smaller than I used to be... weaker too, and that things could get even worse with the slightest mistake. Part of me thought all these changes would be inevitable, but a much larger part of was in denial. I would tell myself I never needed that sort of satisfaction again, that I could distract myself enough.

I turned back to her, and noticed she was already well into the water. She did have a shirt on at the very least, though I can't see much as she's submerged from the shoulders down. That was reassuring...

"It is nice, isn't it?" I smile at her, more genuinely this time. I was beginning to feel better. In fact I hadn't felt this good in a long time. Maybe I really could work today at bringing our relationship closer to where it was.

"So..." I ask, bobbing along, only my head above water, "now that we have power back...how about I make you breakfast? We can use the toaster again...the microwave..." We're facing one another; him half-standing on the slope going down into the deep end, half treading water.

We'd managed, over these past few months, to cook. To eat. We had propane rations, a firepit in the back yard. Sterno. But having the electricity back! Wow! I'm excited! It'll make some things so much easier.

As he starts to answer, I stand up in the shallow end, my chest and shoulders rising above the surface, and I see his eyes drop down my torso...my yellow t-shirt clinging to me wetly...

"Breakfast?" I'd sort of forgotten about the power coming on already. That would mean a far easier time cooking, and a hell of a lot more variety then before. "I'd love something to eat! I'm up for just about anything!" Even the idea of toast was appealing. Everything would be so much easier now. This thought helped my smile; I was indeed feeling good today.

When Val got out of the water however, I felt my eyes immediately drawn to her chest and torso. Oh god, her shirt. Her chest is, so big. I forgot how big she was... she'd put on some muscle too. My mind was beginning to cloud over, and I was finding it very difficult to look away.

"Oh, ummm. Sorry, Hun. You can be very distracting..." I blush and pull my eyes away, though I can't help but begin to get hard having seen her like this.

"Oh no, really honey?" I half-scold, "is it happening again?"

I play exasperation, but secretly I love the idea of him getting hard for me. I know it's wrong! Erections have become uncomfortable for him, and don't wane easily. We all know what happens if he gives in to them. I feel badly for him but part of me...

I look down at my chest and marvel myself at what he's trying so hard to not look at. My breasts...god they look huge. I was a full C-cup before the virus, and now - thoug I haven't been properly measured - I've been squeezing myself into DD's and I suspect I'm actually a size or two bigger.

He looks anxious, suddenly, and I know I shouldn't make things worse. I submerge myself up to my neck again, and drift a little closer to him.

"Has it been painful, recently?"

We don't talk about this very much... she knows it makes me uncomfortable, and often weak and powerless. I should be able to control such urges, but sometimes it's extremely difficult.

"Painful, may not be the right word? It's frustrating... and sometimes a little bit overwhelming." It's difficult to make eye contact with her right now, and I can feel a slight blush running through my cheeks. I need to avoid turning back towards her and looking at her or this could all get significantly worse quite quickly. Sometimes the thought of her being so much, bigger, slips into my mind though. I wish I could do something about it, to act on these urges... I want to, sometimes I need to.

"Some moments are worse than others, but yes, recently it's been... harder. I have to overcome this though..." I want to talk about it, but I don't at the same time. It can be embarrassing, humiliating even. Remember, you decided to put in an effort today Jack... you need to be more open. "I really appreciate your patience and understanding Val. I've been fairly distant over the past while, but you need to know just how much I appreciate all of this."

I haven't picked up on her eagerness yet. I'm usually too self-absorbed at these times to notice much more than surface expressions on her part. To me she simply comes across as a caring, concerned wife...

I am caring, I am concerned. But there are other feelings too...

"I know, I know sweetie..." I say, wanting nothing more than to move in, take him in my arms, and hold him - but knowing I can't, "we're in this together, right? No matter what's happening out there in the world, it's just you and me here..."

He's avoiding my gaze. I understand why. I know just the sight of my face, a look into my eyes, can be hard for him to handle. The poor thing. Even just the sound of my voice...the virus has done this to him, and it's getting worse...I know it affects him...

<shiver>

I have to try again

"But, honey," I start, inching towards him just a little more, only my head and shoulders above water, "you know that - if you ever did need my help - that we wouldn't end up like...the other couples out there..."

He's a journalist and - doing what we do from day to day, trying to get news from the outside world and publish it in our little paper - he's well aware of the fate most men find when they finally couple with a "wife" these days. Some of the stories are...

<shiver>

"So, baby, please," I say, just vaguely knowing I'm speaking my own urges and drifting in again a bit more, "if it ever gets too much to handle...just once even...I'm here..."

Her speech, it's really getting to me. It's almost hypnotic. Is she saying these things to comfort me? I sense a little bit of eagerness coming from her; the way she's speaking. As much as I want to deny its effect on me, it does elicit a rise. I'm already fairly turned on, but the sensual nature of her voice... and what she's suggesting, gets my heart beating even faster. It sends a shiver through me.

It takes me a while to respond. My body aches to give in, to achieve release... it's been so long. I need it, don't I? No, I don't! I need to refrain. If I give in... I can't give in. I don't want to think about how we could change even further... Though, she may be right. We would be different than those other couples, wouldn't we? She wouldn't dominate me, or abuse me, like a lot of other women would. She would be kind, and caring. She would nurture me, and make the process as easy and comfortable as possible, wouldn't she? My sense of pride and dignity tells me not to think these thoughts.

"I... really appreciate that Val, but, we can't, right? I, think I need us to remain equal." I find my gaze slowly drawn towards her. I look her in the eyes. They're so, powerful; there is such a degree of passion there. She is feeling something intense, but what?

She's moving closer to me, but I don't want to move away. I can't move away. I said I'd be open, that I'd make an effort today. Doing something like this, that would be making an effort right? She seems like she wants to take care of me. I should let her... right?

"Are you really okay with us changing further?" My eyes drop down to her torso again, gazing in curiosity at what I can't quite clearly see through the water. "I mean... it is, hard... it's so hard. Sometimes, it's overwhelming. I... I need it."

Ohmigod omigod ohmigod. Is he really saying this? My heart starts faster. Is he really, really saying this? I bite my plump lower lip to keep from sighing aloud. I know I know I know...I have to hold back...slow is best...I don't want to scare him...

"Oh honey we'd never be unequal..." I manage, knowing I have to say what he wants to hear, "we don't have to become...like that..." I move in closer and put one hand up, from under the water, into his chest. "It could be just once, to ease the struggle a little bit..."

I'll say anything at this point.

"We wouldn't change that much," I continue, "if it was just once, just one time..." I look at him, at my precious, precious man. His thick, tousled hair already starting to dry, his hazel eyes again avoiding mine. My pulse races quicker...would he let me do it...here? "How bad could it be, right?" I ask, "If you lost just a little bit more? It'd feel so good, right?"

Already, I think, my shoulders are broader than his; I might actually outweigh him as well. But at this point, we're just about the same height. If we were to...relieve him, I would end up taller than he is. But I can't say this...what man wants to be smaller than his wife?

I have to do this right.

Subtley, as subtley as I can manage, I rise up a fraction, allowing the top swells of my big breasts to break the surface of the water, covered by the slick smooth cotton of my yellow tee. It's the inner voices making me do this, the urges. It's not me, it's not Valerie Stone, dutiful wife and partner who wants to grab hold of his huge, hard cock and...stop.

But he's looking at my breasts oh god he's looking at my breasts. I bite my lip again and let him look. It's the virus doing this, I know...but it feels so right.

"We can do it, honey," I whisper, moving closer still, "just once..."

I'm mesmerized by her right now. Everything she says makes perfect sense. Ultimately, I don't want to agree with her but I find myself unable to resist. Her eyes are such a dark green, and so deep; I could easily get lost in them.

Her face is slim, with a cute nose. Her lips have gotten fuller since she was affected by the virus. My god, if she was to pout over anything... adorable. And her skin. It was always smooth it now, I want to touch it so badly. Her silky dark brown hair is down and also looks softer than ever. Part of it is plastered wetly onto her nicely tanned shoulders, and, well, hanging over the bulges in her yellow shirt. She's come out of the water and two beautiful swells are visible. I can't help but look.

I don't want to think about certain parts of her, even if they may be appealing. Her shoulders, they may be wider than mine, but no, I can't. That's just a trick of the eyes right? Based on her new curves and my, degraded muscles, she may very well weigh more than me... that's embarrassing.

I can feel myself weakening further when her hand rests on my chest. Oh god... this is happening, isn't it? At this point I'm barely able to focus on what she's saying, and my cock is pulling painfully at my swimsuit.

When I hear her mention me being smaller, and it feeling good, I quickly snap back to reality and panic slightly.

"No! I mean, no hun. I'm sorry... I didn't mean to yell..." I back away from her quickly, to the side of the pool, forcing myself to look everywhere but at her.

"I can't, we shouldn't... I need to remain how I am. I don't want to be smaller than you, weaker than you." My shame rises to my cheeks at the thought. She was able to get into my head so easily... calm down... calm down. I dunk my head quickly again. "I'm... sorry Val. Pl... please understand." God, I'm so shaken up...

He's not ready.

I don't argue. I know it won't help, and I know I shouldn't.

I listen, and I understand. He's a proud man, and this is hard. It's hard on all of them, watching us get bigger as they get to be...less. It's shameful, it's emasculating, becoming smaller than your partner, watching her grow as you shrink under the needs of your own failing body. And for him, it's even worse...I'm his wife.

I follow behind him, slowly, in the pool. I give him his space, I let him talk. When he comes to the edge of the pool I let him stand there, arms up on the side, and cool down. I listen some more, until he's finished.

Then, from behind him, I give him a hug.

My breasts squash wetly into his back.

"I'll go inside and make you some breakfast..." I whisper, into his ear.

And with that, I'm gone.

He's not ready...yet.

I hold my breath as she hugs me from behind... Oh, God... that feels so, amazing. I need to resist the urge to turn around right now and, and, bury myself in that softness.

"Okay, Val. Thank you..." I don't trust myself to say anything more.

As she goes inside to make breakfast, I breath a sigh of relief, and have to resist the urge to turn and watch her walk into the kitchen. I can only imagine how that shirt is clinging to her amazing curves right now.

It's easier, much easier, now that she's removed herself from this situation. At the same time, however, part of me is intensely disappointed, by both the removal of her large, soft breasts from my back and the passing potential to finally achieve some much needed relief. Even the feeling of her arms wrapped around me like that was oddly pleasing. They were, bigger... stronger. No... Jack, control yourself. You don't need it. You want it very badly, sure, but you can go without it. You HAVE to go without it.

After a few more minutes of sitting in the pool, and trying to calm myself down, I get out of the pool and walk inside. I did manage to calm myself a little bit, but not enough. I sneak inside and dart towards the bedroom without her noticing. I spend some time there, slowly getting dressed (being in more than a simple swimsuit helps calm me further), before making my way downstairs to the kitchen.

Since seeing her in the pool, there is a sense of dread hanging over me, a sense that something will happen, soon, and I won't be able to resist it. At the same time, it excites me. However, knowing it excites me is humiliating, and degrading. I don't want to look forward to something like that... I really don't.

"So... what have you decided to cook?" I'm trying to keep the conversation innocent. I still can't bear to look at her, and have to put a ton of effort into keeping my gaze elsewhere.

"Pancakes!" I exclaim, looking to my right as he comes through the living room and climbs up into a stool at the countertop bar that separates it from the kitchen. I am excited myself - pancakes! With the electricity on, the griddle works! Take advantage now...who knows how long it'll last?

I'm just finishing up my first batch and start to plate a few for him. I've changed into a large, blue denim button-down that falls past my hips. For now it's just a pair of panties below, but I know I'll have to put something else on if we decide to go in to the offices today. He'll want to, I know, to see if we have electricity there, too. And then he'll want to work, to find out more about the state of the electric grid, to write...

But for now let's get him fed.

"Don't these smell great??" I ask, pouring warm syrup over a tall stack for him. I'm not going to say anything about earlier, in the pool. I know he needs his space, right now. I put the plate in front of him, up at our bar, and smile warmly. "Eat up!"

"Thank you Val. These smell delicious!" I appreciate her getting dressed, and not mentioning anything about what happened in the pool. It's on my mind, and proving difficult to get rid of. These pancakes will prove to be an added distraction; I love her pancakes. I reach for the plate and dig right in, and they are indeed delicious. It doesn't take me long to finish the ones she'd set in front of me.

I do notice in the back of my mind that the stool is higher than normal. Well, it's actually the same size, but, you know. I've gotten used to it though, as much as getting used to this new size is a tad humiliating. I just hope I don't have to readjust again...

"So, ummm, I was wondering if you'd like to head into the office today. If electricity is back up there too, well, we could get a lot done. If you don't want to, that's fine. I'm just feeling very eager thinking about it." At the same time, part of me dreads this. All of the men have left but himself and one other due to the virus, being a lot more advanced in that degree. After a certain point, none of them are able to handle the work... and I fear that, but no... that won't happen to me.

On another note, almost all of the women would be... well... larger. Around Vals size at least, with some even bigger. They have men feeding their growth almost every day. Thinking about it terrifies me, but excites me. I hate myself for getting excited over this sort of thing, but their breasts... hips, thighs... oh God, I'm getting excited again. Calm down Jack, calm down. My eyes gradually fall on my wife again. She's beautiful, and toned. Looking at her legs I can tell they're already quite strong, and fill out the button-down almost perfectly. My mind drifts now, thinking about what she would look like after another spurt of growth... and then another, and another...

I smile, when he mentions going in going in to the city, to check on the offices and presses, to work on the paper today. I know him so well! It's what motivates him, day to day, it's what gets him out of bed...being a journalist, still. Getting information to the people. So much of it so horrible, in the aftermath of the disease. So much of it so devastating, discovering what's been lost. And so much of it - he's just now finding out - so disturbing, seeing what's rising from the ashes...

I also smile feeling his eyes on me, on my figure. It's hard to hide, it really is, even in a big, loose shirt like this, how big my butt's gotten, how my chest has grown. My legs...they're like someone else's legs, a weightlifter's or something. But I smile, I can't help it, feeling his eyes on me...

...for his sake, I don't get too close, during breakfast. I eat opposite him, standing at the stove across the bar. We talk. Breakfast is...nice.

-------------------

I let him drive us in to the city today. Like most of the survivors, we've taken our pick of the thousands of now-unused vehicles littering the city and suburbs, where we still live. I chose something useful - mine is a big, white, luxury SUV and I've had the same one for months. Jack, on the other hand...well, I'll let him explain it if he cares to. The man likes his cars.

All I care to know about this one is that it's red and Italian and that my legs barely fit in it. And it drives real fast, like we're doing now down our (very, very) quiet neighborhood streets. Most of the houses are kinda like ours - architectural ranches, some colonials and Victorians - but most are abandoned. We're some of the only people left out here in the suburbs; most everyone has gravitated slowly into the city, where a new population has begun to congregate, a new community start to grow. We haven't moved - yet - because Jack feels there would be too much pressure, too many expectations that he and I should start...things. And he's probably right...we're probably better being out here, a little off the grid for now...

"SO WHO DO YOU EXPECT WILL COME IN TODAY??" I yell, over the roar of the engine as we speed down the streets. I don't know why he drives like this but whatever. "MARIE AND TONI SAID THEY'D BE IN," I continue, trying not to be nervous as we skid around a corner, "AND HOPEFULLY HENRY WILL MAKE IT IN TO LOOK AT THE PRESSES...IF LISA LETS HIM..."

I get irritated when she mentions some of the people who we'd maybe see today. Henry should be in today, Lisa be damned! I know they progressed further then Val and I have but God damn it, Henry is a good friend, and she's not his boss or mother.

We would never get to that point. If Val ever treated me like that, well, there'd be hell to pay. Marie was a bit different though. Whereas I didn't have to spend much time talking to and meeting with Lisa, Marie was always around when I went into the office. I often got the impression Marie flaunted her status, used it as a status symbol around whatever men or women were present. She probably even enjoyed belittling and humiliating men in public.

"I'm not really sure... I'll be honest hun, the office isn't as friendly to men anymore. I get angry, and nervous sometimes when I'm there. I'd rather just check up on things and do some work on my own, then hopefully get out of there without having to really talk to anyone." I too had to yell over the car engine. It was loud, but what the hell. I didn't enjoy much in this new world so at the very least I'd enjoy what I could. It was a shame there weren't more people to see me driving a Lamborghini. Never thought I'd see the day myself.

Dealing with the women was difficult. They were always making advances. Marie, though she didn't often come onto me, was the worst. She never missed an opportunity to treat me poorly. Not to mention she was so... big. It scared me, intimidated me. As much as I'd hate to admit that.

We were almost at the office now. I was feeling good about it but the slight bit that Val said got into my head. I was nervous now, apprehensive. I hoped today would go smoothly, but I had this nagging sensation that today wouldn't go as well as I'd hoped.

I pulled into the parking lot and began gathering my things. I know I sounded bitter when Val brought up our co-workers. I hope I hadn't made her feel bad or anything. She was the best of all the women I'd met since the virus hit. I'm not just saying that because she's my wife. She hasn't changed how she acts, or how she treats me. She's even been respectful of my space and desires. I've heard that can be... difficult? Apparently men aren't the only ones keeping sexual desire in check.

When we get into the office building, I'm struck first by how different the whole place looks with the lights on! Even just the lobby, the hallways...it's not as creepy scary abandoned looking as it had been seeming. And when we get into the suite of offices we've been using...it's even better. The five of us survivors from the original company plus the other few women who have drifted in over time to help us publish our little newspaper over the past couple months have kept the offices looking relatively nice. Functional, at least...as functional as a news company can be without computers, phones or electric coffee makers.

Well, at least now we'll have coffee. The phones and of course the Internet are a thing of the past. The systems went down soon after the virus hit, and though there's always talk of working to get them back on line, we all know that's a massive undertaking. The new government that's been forming has basically taken control of all the utilities and while we don't have running water or phones or, like, much...at least now we have lights. That's encouraging, right? Maybe this collective government isn't as bad as Jack makes it out to be...

So, Marie and Toni are here, talking with Selma, Dina and Denise in the conference room over stacks of papers. That tall, blonde woman from the government that's been dropping by a lot recently is in there, too...she's nice, though I know Jack doesn't trust her. I give them all a wave through the glass wall as we walk by while Jack is drifting over to his desk, away from the meeting. He seems apprehensive. Though he may be at the presses, I don't see Henry or his "wife" yet...probably for the best, though I know Jack would like to talk with Henry.

"Hey, hon..." I offer, coming up behind Jack as he settles into his desk chair, "wanna go in to see what everyone's chatting about?"

I try to avoid making eye contact with as many people as I can. They all serve as constant reminders as to what's happened since the virus hit, especially Marie. She's just, too big to ignore. I can't help but glance at her when we walk by the conference room.

Val comes into my office as I'm settling down. She knows I'm probably in a somewhat sour mood. I did say I'd make an effort today. As much as I don't want to spend any time talking with the women, maybe I should. It could help give the impression to Val that I'm feeling alright today.

"Ya, sure... I didn't expect everyone gathered there so maybe it's best if we find out what's going on." I smile at Val and lead the way to the conference room. I haven't noticed as many of the changes around the office as Val, though I do smell coffee, and appreciate being able to see print more clearly. Reading and editing in the dark is difficult, obviously.

We arrive at the conference room and I open the door, going in first. I know some of the women present will see even this as weird. A lot of them believe a woman should always lead a man nowadays. Everyone looks at me, some with lust and curiosity, some with disdain or disregard. Now that I'm closer to her, Marie actually looks even bigger than I remember. Shes so, tall, and muscular. Not to mention how ridiculously big her boobs and ass are, and her thighs are so... thick. She must have taken more from whatever poor guy got stuck with her.

"Hello, everyone. I didn't expect that a meeting would be held today. May I ask what's up?" I tried to be calm and polite but I could tell my anxiety was showing through. I can't help but stare at Marie. I look away after a few seconds though; I can't let Val see me staring like that...