Patreon LogoYour support makes Blue Moon possible (Patreon)

He's Not Quite What She Seems (Kveria & Xerxes)

Xerxes

Moon
Joined
Jan 20, 2015
Walking along across the still-unfamiliar campus of his new University, Sammie Page couldn't help keeping his head down and avoiding eye contact with any of the other students on the way to their own classes. He knew that the anxiety would lessen as he got more familiar with everything and, to a much lesser extent, everyone. But for the moment, it was practically crippling.

As he approached the building that contained the room his first class would take place in, he couldn't help but wonder how everyone saw him as they passed him by. He was wearing a pair of somewhat form-fitting jeans, and a light blue hoodie halfway unzipped to reveal the plain white shirt he was wearing underneath it, which also went well with the similarly light blue slip-ons he was wearing. He wasn't showing very much of it, but every inch of his skin that was visible was quite obviously smooth, soft, and meticulously hairless (Save for that on his head, of course). For all appearances, he didn't doubt that almost everyone assumed he was a girl just from his looks, and not even a particularly tomboyish one at that. It embarrassed him enough that his cheeks warmed up a bit, but he also couldn't help wondering if any of the guys that passed him by happened to take a liking to the way he looked...

When he finally reached the doorway into the building that was his destination, he quickly shook himself out of these thoughts, trying to hold his head the slightest bit higher now that he was inside. Turning right, like he remembered from the tour he'd taken a little bit ago, he didn't have to walk far before reaching the classroom... Room 3104... currently housing the advanced literature class that he was set to attend. Standing outside the door with slightly pursed lips for a moment, he shifted the small white backpack slung over his shoulders for a moment, before taking a deep breath and then stepping inside.

He was relatively early to class, so not many of his new classmates had quite arrived yet, but those that had looked to be a mixed bag of either attentive and making sure they were ready to begin, or already bored enough that their eyes seemed to be glazing over a bit. Glancing over, he saw Professor Hurst - a fairly old, balding man - getting his own things together as well, in preparation for teaching. Catching his eye as he looked up to see who had entered the room, Sammie met the friendly smile he was given with a slightly nervous one of his own, before turning back to the rows of seats to try and pick out one for himself.

It looked as though most of the students so far were congregating near the front of the classroom, with a couple of stragglers sprinkled throughout the back here and there. Eventually spotting a fairly vacant area of the room, he walked up quietly and then took his seat, glancing over for a moment at the girl on the other end of the same row, before turning his attention down to his backpack as he set it down on the desk and began to pull out his own necessary materials. Alright... he'd made it to class, and he was sitting down, and ready to begin... he was ready, he repeated to himself in his head, though he didn't feel any more confident for having thought it...
 
It wasn’t like him to be late. Leander was always up at the crack of dawn, showered, completely prepared and ready to go before everyone else. He was used to always being the first one there and the last one to leave. It had been true of every passion he’d pursued in his lifetime thus far. When he’d thought he would grow up to help his mother run the stable, he was already up, had the automatic water bowls turned on and was passing out the bran mash, beat pulp, and sweet feed when his mother got to the barn—hay was heavier so he let her deal with that. Even now, as he rolled out of bed in his very empty apartment he could still smell the sweet, slightly tangy scent and it made him a little homesick. Of course, once he’d rolled out of bed, he took note of the time and flew into a panic, running himself through the shower, partially drying his hair, and then barely dressing in a pair of dark wash jeans and a blue t-shirt with a graphic of the little boy from ET crashing into the moon while the alien tumbled away toward the bottom of the shirt. It was still early September and summer was clinging with all its might, so he only threw on a light grey sweater just to cover his arms.

Luckily his building wasn’t that far from the campus and traffic seemed to be flowing in the right order, so he didn’t end up missing class, but this still wasn’t exactly what he’d had in mind for his first day. What made it worse, when he walked into the classroom, Professor Hurst turned his eyes up at him, slightly narrowed and all Leander could do was return an apologetic grin, rub the back of his neck and sulk away to a mostly empty part of the classroom, sitting down not far from a particularly pretty young lady—he didn’t normally care to notice those around him, being pretty self-sufficient and a little introverted, but she had captured his attention and he offered her a small smile as he unpacked his things. Pens, paper, Inspirion 14 5000 Series Touch Notebook… Classic Literature textbook…? He’d brought the wrong book.

For a moment he panicked, but then in occurred to him that he was an adult; he was twenty-three and had taken a few years to do the things he wanted to take care of before he sold his soul back into educational slavery; he finally showed one of his mother’s horses at the FEI even though he only took eighth, he saw the Grand Canyon, got piss drunk and blew a bunch of cash in Vegas, toured Norway with his grandparents to learn about his family’s heritage, and visited his cousins in British Columbia. Through all this, he kept his Tumblr well-updated with pictures and long-winded articles about the things he was seeing. The last one as he returned home to finally find an apartment and get a damned life lamented about all the things he hadn’t gotten to do, like see Hobbiton in New Zealand. The Lord of the Rings books had been a much beloved series of his for as long as he could remember, though he didn’t care for the movies—for a literature enthusiast, he felt they took much too much away from the novels; but that didn’t stop him from wanting to go see the sets.

Leander turned to look at the girl next to him, scooted over several places and offered a short and quiet, “Hi,” as he neared her. He offered a half smile and took a second to examine her further. He let his eyes wander briefly over her and suddenly felt a little self-conscious, wearing a crappy ET parody tee with his damp hair pulled into a ponytail like a damp yacht mop hanging down his back. He shifted uncomfortably; he really didn’t want to seem like he was the kind of person who didn’t take class seriously—this was his passion and he knew he had no excuse for his present state. “Hey, sorry. I forgot my textbook. Do you mind sharing with me?”
 
Just before class was getting ready to begin, after trying to psych himself up for a few more minutes, Sammie glanced up toward the front of the classroom again when someone else entered just in time to not technically be late, a rather flustered looking guy with fairly long, damp-looking hair pulled back into a ponytail. Idly watching him make his way up to find a seat, before blinking a bit in surprise when he happened to take a seat on the same row as him, just a few seats down. Seeing him give him a small smile, he suddenly realized he'd been kind of staring at him, and managed to return the smile with a little awkward one of his own before turning forward once again. Well... his college social life was already off to a roaring start.

Finally, just as the professor seemed to be gearing up to begin class, Sammie glanced over at the boy again, his eyes widening slightly in surprise as he noticed that he was actually scooting over to sit right beside him, offering a quiet little greeting as he did. "O-oh, hey." He returned his greeting, feeling his cheeks warming a little bit at the boy's unexpected closeness. When he went on to explain that he'd forgotten his textbook, however, Sammie offered him an understanding smile. "Ah, sure!" He agreed, turning a little bit and nudging his textbook over to sit on the desk right between the two of them. After a moment of hesitation, he lifted his hand up and offered it to the boy, having to practically force himself to do it through his own awkwardness. "... I'm Sammie, by the way." He added in as friendly of a voice as possible.
 
"Sweet Jesus, thank you. You have no idea what a lifesaver you are." Leander was generally more of an introvert—he didn't like people that much unless he had to, because he could be quite charismatic and charming if he absolutely needed to be. He already found, however, that he liked this girl and found her shy, awkward nature endearing. He thought about making a point of sitting next to her often because she wasn't likely to be the type to interrupt him or distract him while he was taking notes, and to top it off shy people often tended toward being the intellectual type, which Leander liked. People with brains had so much more depth and he liked to learn and enrich himself all that he could because only experience could colour the canvas of a well-developed novel. It was part of the reason he'd done so much travelling before university; he needed to see things for himself, gather a wealth of up close and personal information before he began a long and boring career in journalism or teaching English as funding for his dream.

"I'm Leander," he replied, taking Sammie's hand in his. He savoured the softness of her skin with a gentle but firm squeeze and a small shake before he pulled away—didn't want to seem too creepy on the first day, did he? Well, how creepy could someone wearing a t-shirt that depicted poor little ET's disgraceful descent back to Earth, which would probably result in a messy demise? He didn't really want the answer to that question, actually. He knew the answer. That was probably the wrong shirt to wear to his first day of class, and that's all there was to it. He zipped it into his sweater with a fair bit of shame. Looking back over at Sammie, Leander opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off as Professor Hurst began his class and he turned his full attention instead to what he was supposed to be learning. No point getting them both in trouble on the first day.

During the rest of the class, Leander took notes on his Notebook and avoided class participation if he could. When he absolutely had to speak, he did so eloquently but directly, and always had his answers spot on. This was his passion, after all. He was a little disappointed that he didn't find the class all that challenging, but it was only the first day. For some sick reason he looked forward to having four papers due in one day and no idea how to write any of them, half-asleep at his desk at four in the morning and riding out the last of his twelfth cup of coffee and third Monster while begging for Death to just take him already. Maybe he was a little masochistic. He wasn't actually quite sure. It was more likely that these things would give him a reason to back out of social interaction and also moved him forward at the same time. After all, you don't come out of these things weaker. By the end of the class, Leander was satisfied and set his reading glasses on top of his now dry dark golden hair.

"That was pretty good. Thanks for the textbook," he said, this time in a normal speaking voice compared to his hushed tones from earlier. He reclined in his chair, stretching his arms up and back while he waited for his Notebook to shut down. "So, are you planning on majoring in English, making a career out this... or are you just doing it because you need the credit? Not to pry, but I'm curious why someone like you would stick themselves in a boring Introductory English Lit. class when they could be... I don't know, modelling or something."
 
Maintaining his friendly smile as the boy shook his hand and introduced himself as Leander, Sammie could feel himself consciously trying not to act weird. He wanted to leave a good impression on Leander... maybe even make his first friend in quite a long while. To him, it seemed like a bit of a lofty goal, but one that was at least worth giving a shot. Turning to pull his notebook up in front of himself, he glanced back over at Leander and noticed him about to say something, turning to look at him curiously before jumping slightly in his seat as Professor Hurst launched into his lecture rather suddenly. Pursing his lips slightly as Leander quickly turned his attention forward, Sammie did the same, already beginning to take studious notes of whatever he could.

Sammie didn't find any of the material too terribly challenging as the class wore on, but he nonetheless took careful notes of everything, fully intending to perform as perfectly as he could in the class, from the start. When things finally wrapped up, and some of the less eager students quickly stood to shuffle out of the room, Sammie turned to begin carefully packing his things away, pausing to glance back at Leander as he sat back, thanking him for letting him use his textbook.

"Ah, any time!" He answered with a small smile, before giving him a curious look as he went on to ask if he was majoring in English, or making a career out of literature or something, explaining that he thought someone like him didn't seem like they would be in a Lit. class, when they could be 'modelling or something'. At that, Sammie's eyes widened a bit, and his cheeks quickly flushed with color. "W-wha...? I... o-oh, um..." He stammered, having trouble properly reacting to the sudden glowing compliment. "W-well, I... I'm actually... undeclared right now... I'm just taking classes to try and find something that interests me, I guess..." He muttered, a little bit embarrassed to admit how uncertain his plans for the future were. "Um... what about you?" He asked as he turned the question back at Leander, fixing him with a curious look.
 
"Well," he started, sitting upright and beginning to pack his things back into his bag. "I'm actually interested in becoming a novelist. I'm not sure what kind of things I want to write about, probably something very typical and not fun at all though, so I don't know if I'll ever be published. But that's my dream." He shrugged it off like he wasn't very interested in the topic, but couldn't help feeling a little empty—sure, he used to write epic stories as a child, but everything he'd tried lately ended in a miserable crash and burn around the third chapter when his muse ended up hitting a brick wall and moped there with no hope of ever reviving her in all her original beauty. He cursed her for being fickle; but wasn't that just how women could be? He let his eyes wander up to Sammie, wondering what it would be that she finally found her passion in, whether her passion would send her it to a downward spiral like his was doing to him. "I guess if I never end up finishing a book, I can always teach English or write articles for the media. That's not really what I want to do, but I'm going to end up picking one of them to pay for my hobby anyway."

He stood, slinging the khaki messenger bag over his shoulder, gripping the strap with both hands. He was hesitating like he didn't exactly want to leave, and he didn't. He hadn't met anyone like Sammie in a while—he'd seen her diligently taking notes and paying attention, so he could see that she was truly looking for ambition and passion instead of letting it come to her. He figured that she was someone who understood that it didn't work if you weren't proactive about it, and he liked just that one thing he really knew about her. You couldn't fake that kind of thing. "I hope you find something you truly love; and when you do, just go for it, no matter what anyone thinks. Anyway, I've got Classic Lit. after this and then a line up of mandatory credits that I'm going to suffer through just because I have to. I'd like to walk with you, at least some of the way to your next class. If that's alright with you, I mean."
 
Sammie's eyes quickly lit up when Leander mentioned his plans to become a novelist, the thought of Leander chasing a dream like that being at once rather exciting, even if he didn't know him all that well. His expression dropped a bit when he went on to explain things weren't as rosy as all that, though, and he was left with just a small, understanding smile as Leander finished by saying he could always fall back on teaching English or writing articles. Seeing him beginning to stand up, Sammie suddenly realized he hadn't finished packing his things yet, and quickly turned to do that. Just as he was finishing stuffing the last book into the pack, however, he paused when he heard Leander keep speaking, telling him that he hoped he found his own passion, and went for it. Turning to look at him again, he smiled happily as he finished zipping up his backpack, before blinking in surprise as he asked if he could walk with him to his next class, at least partway.

"O-oh! Um... I-I mean, absolutely! Of course!" He answered, recovering his smile even as he felt his cheeks flush with a bit of color. Throwing his backpack over his shoulder and hesitating for a moment, as he reached to rub one of his arms a little awkwardly. "Ah, but... my next class is AP Psychology... it'd be kinda out of your way... so you don't have to, or anything..." He said a little meekly. "I wouldn't want you to be late on my account..."
 
“That’s fine. We can walk out to the courtyard together, and then split from there,” he pointed out, turning to head for the door and holding it open to allow Sammie out first in a very chivalrous, gentlemanly fashion. It just seemed like the right thing to do for a woman that he had already gained so much respect for in the span of one class. Being normally reclusive, this was something kind of new for Leander; new and neither unwelcome nor unpleasant. He thought that Sammie was cute, could guess that she probably didn’t have many friends or much contact with other people; she seemed shy and awkward, but those kinds of people always had some kind of beautiful depth that was completely unexpected to closed-minded people. Not that Leader had much of a wandering mind. He was rather indifferent to most things until it came down to writing, horses, and homosexuality. That was when he became a moody, snappy, and opinionated individual that no one really wanted to deal with—after all, he could be good at arguing if he felt like it was something worth arguing about.

Like the one time when he competed against one of his friend’s sisters in grade school. They didn’t speak at the show even though he tried to get his friend’s attention and say hello, ask him to cheer for him in the show ring instead of his sister. What ended up happening was the whole, “riding is for girls” argument the next Monday when they were at school and Leander was shunned for partaking in a girl’s sport. Leander ended up with a three-day suspension that time for the brawl that ensued while he tried to defend himself; later his riding made him the butt of several gay jokes, round about the time of Brokeback Mountain, and he went off one more time, because there was absolutely no Goddamned way he was gay. Maybe that was when he truly began to push people away with a lack of trust and a surplus of anger; he’d gotten over most of those things, but he still found it hard to truly feel like he was getting close to people now.

That was why it felt odd that he was interested in what depths Sammie might have; he hadn’t been interested in someone, truly, for years. He was happy that he shared a class with her and would be able to see her as much as he wanted; hopefully he’d leave a good impression and she would want to get to know him just as much as he wanted to get to know her. He didn’t really consider himself a deep person, though, and he liked to be the asker rather than the answerer; that was just the kind of person he was. So he was slightly concerned that Sammie might not find him to be the kind of person who was worth her time. Not that he was going to let that shake him though.

“So….” Leander started awkwardly and aimlessly as they made their way out of the classroom together. He kept his pace a little slower than average but kept an eye on his watch; at this pace, and according to the tour, he had more than enough time to walk Sammie out to the courtyard and then head back into the English Department for his next class. Hopefully Sammie would have enough time to make it to her class because being late on the first day was probably the worst thing that could happen, and he knew that all too well. “What kinds of things are you into? Like… books, movies, music, sports maybe.” It was a typical first meeting question, but it was relevant nonetheless; would give them something to talk about, and would find some of the basest things they had in common so Leander could gauge the chance on connectivity between the two of them. If nothing else, he wanted Sammie as a friend, he would just like some common ground for them to begin on; they could build up from there. For the first time in a little while he was confident about a social endeavour.
 
Back
Top Bottom