You came home.... (PandaxMarxistPanda)

Rich wasn't sure how to respond to her request at first. What if he had an episode in the middle of the night. It'd been a very long time since he'd slept in the same bed with another person. Especially one this small. Rex wasn't there to bring him back from the nightmares.Slowly his head turned to her and he shifted himself from on top of her to laying down beside her, his arm laced around her just below the ample swells of her breasts, enjoying the warmth he found there.

"Can I talk to you about something first?" Gently he pressed his forehead to her temple and kissed her cheek gently. "I was discharged from the military because I developed PTSD. This was when I was suppose to come home from my original contract, but what I didn't tell anyone is that I reenlisted for another four years. I was going places and I didn't want to give it all up. But then..." He searched his mind for the words; the painful crippling words. The addition of weakness, of defeat. "...I became sick."

He had stronger, more self destructive terms of it that he used in his head, but he knew that she would scold him for using them just as his counselor and commanding officer did. They did their best to re-assure him that he was a fine soldier and that his condition was an injury of war just as any physical wound he could have received. He tried his best to believe them but he never wood. He would never get over the flight home, in a plane full of men and women missing arms or legs. Or burns that would scare them for the rest of their lives. While he sat there at the height of his physical prowess, strong and able-bodied, being sent home because he was deemed too psychologically damaged to continue his service. The only thing that kept him from opening the bay door and jumping out was Rex; with his paws on his thighs as he licked the salty tears from his face before any of the other soldiers could see them.

"I am prone to nightmares in which I lash out in the physical world. I react poorly to surprises and sometimes physical touch." He paused for a moment, feeling the lump of despair in his throat, making it harder for him to talk. "I would love to spend the night up here with you," his arm gently moved up and down her opposite arm, caressing her skin, "But I am too afraid that I would hurt you in my sleep. We could go back to my place and you can spend the night if you'd like. My bed is much bigger there and Rex is there...in case I have an episode." He tore himself apart in his mind for not having the courage to do this one simple thing. He wanted to slam his fists against the sides of his head again and again, but simply set his jaw tightly and closed his eyes until his self-destructive anger had passed. He was terrified of how she would react. Logic told him she would understand, that their love was stronger than his illness. But he was still terrified of her shunning him away as so many had done before.

Her mind started reeling the second he asked if he could tell her something, Athena instantly fearing the worst. That he had fathered a child while he was away, or that he was leaving again. She was so fearful about what he was about to say that when he started to speak, she processed the words but didn't acknowledge them, waiting for the ball to drop. And that was when she heard that he had reenlisted. Of course, with everything else he was saying, it was obvious he wasn't going back, but she felt her skin go hot at the thought of him away from her again, putting his life in danger and risking everything for their country. She had to fight the urge to shoot up out of the bed and panic, when all of the sudden, everything clicked. Everything he had said finally came together in her jumbled up head, looking over him as she ran her fingers over his cheek so gently he'd barely feel it.

Anger welled up again, but certainly not at him. In fact, it was directed inwardly at herself, feeling like it was her fault that he had gotten hurt. She knew she should have talked him out of going when they were younger, but he was so adamant. So sure of himself and what he wanted that he wouldn't listen to her worries. They had even fought over it, and it ended with him telling her to accept it or leave. Of course she accepted it, since losing him permanently wasn't an option for her, but it didn't mean she approved of it. God, what she would have done right now to take all the pain away. All the memories and make them her own, just so he didn't have to live with it anymore. Her eyes shut for a moment, half of her wanting to burst into tears at the thought of how much he had to be hurting every second. She had to do whatever it took to make things better for him.

When he finished speaking, she knew he wanted a response, but she didn't have one. She was sure he had had enough of the pity and the sorrys, so she wasn't going to give him those. After all, he should know that she would have done anything to make it so he didn't have to be afraid. Slowly, she turned under his arm, laying on her side and peppering his chest with kisses as she nodded.
"We can spend the night at your place.... as long as I can spend it with you, I don't care where we are...."
Her voice was quiet and gentle, the woman obviously taking care not to agitate him anymore than he already must have been. She could only imagine how difficult it was for him to tell her. Her hand still rested on his cheek as she looked up at him, her fingertips tracing circular designs against his cheek and scalp slowly before she leaned up and kissed his forehead.

"I get it, Rich. Just know that I'd never, ever, ever think any different of you. For five years, you protected us. You kept us safe, and there is nothing about this that makes you any less of a soldier."
She didn't know if her words would reassure him or only seek to make him feel worse, but she hoped it helped. It was how she felt. For years he had put his body and mind in the line of fire, protecting her freedom along with everyone else's in the country, and just because he came home with trauma didn't make him a poor soldier or weak or pathetic. It meant he sacrificed a whole hell of a lot to make sure he could protect this country for as long as he could. Gently, she leaned in, kissing his lips softly before pulling back.
"If you ever need to... talk about it, you can talk to me, you know. I mean, I know you probably won't, but... I'm here.... And I'm not going anywhere..."

Rich smiled and kissed her passionately, "Thank you Athena." It meant a great deal to him to have her support. It was irrational to think that she wouldn't but anxiety was all part of the affliction.

They didn't make it back to the party and no one was surprised that they would slip off together. Richard's home was in town not far from his family home. It was a small thing but it was all that he needed. The outside needed some work and she would see an assortment of tools setting out in the garage as they pulled in, obviously borrowed from his father. The little house was had been a foreclosure and they managed to get it for cheap. Since then he's been working every day to renovate the place. The inside was almost finished so he's been turning some of his focus to the outside.

When Rich opened the front door she could see a beautiful yellow Labrador waiting patiently on the other side of the screen door, waging his tail as fast as he could. When Rich opened the screen door the dog allowed him to enter before rushing to him. Rich sent to his knees and wrapped his arms around the dog, briskly petting his blonde fur. The dog happily licked his face in return. Rich stood then and gestured to Athena.

"Rex, meet Athena, Athena meet Rex," he grinned widely as Rex took to sniffing her shoes and her legs politely looking up at her with a wagging tail.

"Are you hungry at all, Athena?" he asked walking into the kitchen area that was just off from the foyer. The whole house has a modern feel to it with a lot of grays and blacks with dark accent colors thrown in. Despite never reaching a higher rank than Lance Corporal the way he furnished his home made it seem like he had a decent amount of money. Five years of hardly spending a dime of it and investing a portion of it in the right places meant he had a pretty decent nest egg whenever he was discharged. Three years of combat pay didn't hurt his accounts either.

"Something to drink maybe?" he asked and opened a cabinet door, revealing behind it a rather impressive collection of liquors with glass tumblers on the shelf below.

As they arrived at the house, she couldn't help but smile, looking at the tools sprawled out from obvious ongoing projects. It made her remember how much the two of them had grown, which over the past few hours, she kept forgetting. It was so easy for her to forget those five years apart. They didn't matter anymore, because he was home now. And he was hers, now.

Athena watched the dog through the door, instantly smiling wildly at it as it waited patiently. When the dog approached her, the crouched down, scratching the top of his head gently as as watched Rich walk into the kitchen. She immediately stood, up, petting the dog one more time as she followed after him. The dog's feet clicked against the floor behind her, sending the woman smiling as she finally approached him. She wasn't really hungry. God knows, she had spent the first twenty minutes of his welcome home party stuffing food into her face because of how nervous she was. However, the offer of liquor made her perk up, the woman gingerly reaching under the cabinet to grab a bottle of amber liquid and two glasses. She didn't know if he'd drink with her, but she poured him a small glass anyways, handing it to him before she took a sip of her own.

The house was gorgeous, and she was almost hypnotized by how lovely it was. Everything matched and was all set up in such a beautiful way, she couldn't help but run her fingers over the counter tops as she looked at him.
"You did this all yourself?"
She asked sweetly, her voice showing off just how impressed she was with the home. She took a few steps away, slipping her shoes off under the table before she walked a few more steps away. The floor was chilly against her feet, the woman taking a long sip from her glass as she glanced over her shoulder at him.
"It's incredible, Rich.."
She turned to look at him, leaning up against the counter as she stretched slightly, her shirt moving up to show an inch or two of her stomach before it fell back to it's normal position.