It's hard to say where I've come across certain fetishes, or whether it's that some have grown on me or if some have simply been there all along. I'd like to think that the basics of sexual preference are there from birth, but the more I get to talk to new people, the more fluid sexuality seems to be for everyone, so who is to say?
For me, at least, I suppose it's been more like stumbling upon forgotten things in my memory palace, or the subconscious coming to surface. Looking back, I can now see that there were a few moments that seemed insignificant then that make much more sense to me now.
The most prominent and broad fetish being femdom, if you could call it that. I grew up thinking that the term dominant was exclusive to males, and similarly submissive was only for females. With all the gender roles and stereotypes out there that are not even questioned, I'm not really surprised. Even now, outside of places like BM, these stereotypes seem to be the norm, unfortunately, and whenever I happen to deviate from what is considered to be masculine or dominant, I'm told to "an up" by both males and females alike.
In any case, like I said, I do have some memories of acting more submissive back when I was in my teens. Guess it would be important to note now that I'm a virgin, so I can only really guess at what kind of fetishes I'd be into in real life, but back then, I'd had cybered in a few different relationships. Most of the time I'd played a dominant role, which wasn't entirely alien to me, but there were maybe less than a handful of times that I'd asked them to play the dom instead, and they thought it was weird and didn't seem to enjoy it much.
Even before that I think there were some hints to it, although not in a sexual sense. I suppose most kids have some kind of crush or another, and most are shy regardless of gender, so it's not as big of a deal. But then I do think I had some vaguely sexual thoughts of my 2nd grade teacher, which certainly did have her in a sort of dominant role, but I can't recall anything specific about them.
The way I finally found out that femdom was a thing, well, I'm not sure I remember that, oddly enough. I guess it must have just been coming across some hentai depicting it, and later on found forums dedicated to it alone. I think I must have been at least 18 or 19. With all that said, I guess I should move on to more specifics:
-Bondage. I guess this one could be a bit obvious, but I feel it is a fetish itself rather than being a subset of another, so I think it deserves to be mentioned. I like the idea of being bound in some way, by chains or leather or whatever else. I should say that this seemed to be a major part of the first hentai I was introduced to, so perhaps that has been an influence in how I feel about my sexuality. I was maybe around 11 at the time, just working on my own message board made for anime and video games, and one of the only few members to join mentioned hentai to me. Not knowing what it was, I asked about it, and now I guess I have him to thank for what has ultimately lead me here and other places.
-Pain. Again, another thing that would not necessarily go hand in hand with other things. Even then, like with just about any other fetish, there are probably certain things I wouldn't like. Lacking any real experience, this one is harder to say for sure what I'd like and what I wouldn't. I can imagine I'd like some scratching and biting of some kind. Being paddled might not be bad. Not sure about whips or riding crops. Definitely not anything that could cause significant damage.
-Pegging. It seems most would couple this in with pain, judging from how stuff like it is portrayed, but then a lot of those people also generally seem to be young, insecure kids who use the word "gay" as a derogatory term. All I know is that I haven't felt much but pleasure...of course, I have not actually had anyone do this with me yet, and part of it could certainly depend on the size of the strap-on and lube and some other factors, but I've "experimented" a bit.
So it's not as hard of a leap for me to believe I could enjoy it, and definitely reach orgasm from the act by itself(though being restrained and feeling nails digging into my skin might help). Though I do think part of it is also psychological. With me being submissive, the idea of being taken and forced and ridden is a turn on for me.
-Humiliation? This is probably the one I'm least sure of, and the most varied and difficult to define, as well as ones that seem the most recent and to have had time to grow on me. The idea of licking shiny boots clean(so long as they are not *really* dirty) is one of the smaller ones(to add to that, stockings are good, too, though I'm sure licking them would not be desired
). Snowballing has crossed my mind. One of the more prominent ones has been a fascination with leash and collar, thus my avatar of me in one. This kind of goes into another I've had for a bit longer - being a pet. Particularly, a cat, or kitten. I don't know how much humiliating name calling would turn me on - being called her bitch might be ok, but I think I'd prefer kitten, too. Perhaps even being outfitted with ears, one of those tail things they have, ribbons tying some kind of cloth around my hands so I can't use my fingers, maybe a gag of some kind because cats can't talk. As I said, though, it's not easy to tell whether this would really be humiliation or not because I don't feel the pleasure would come entirely out of being humiliated; I do think I'd get a lot out of the simple idea of being her pet.
Those are the main ones, anyway. There are some others, some having more to do with me being dominant although I identify as being mostly submissive.
-Paizuri - or titfucking, to be kind of vulgar about it - has been one, and it's depicted as being one sided, as in a solely dominant act for males, but I have seen some where it is sort of the reverse. For whatever reason, in said pictures, males are forced into it.
-Anal. This is seemingly more common so I don't know if it can really be called a fetish. As much as I lie boobs, as made obvious above, I think I'm an ass man.
That and while women are cool and all, I don't seem to have gone crazy over vagina as much as other guys have. To me, it's always seemed like the rump has been one of the more attractive parts of a lady, so it's been obvious to me that I should try to hit that instead? I don't know. It could be that I'm just hoping that someone will want to return the favor for me.
Of course, only if she wanted it. I don't think I'd be able to do this, or really anything else if it caused her any pain, unless she specifically asked for and wanted me to do anything that would cause her pain.
Finally there are things I've read and seen and heard about that I would not want to try in real life for whatever reason, but find very erotic regardless.
-Sounding/urethral insertion. Initially I thought it looked painful, but then I read about some who found it oddly enjoyable, so before deciding to do anything rash, I looked into it. While it seems ok, it looks like it would be too big a risk for me to take, what with the kind of serious injury that could happen if not followed in exactly the right way, and add to that needing a competent partner that you can trust completely, all for something I may not like anyway. Still fun to see and imagine, though.
-Chastity devices. Another thing that involves trusting another person with. A lot of things do, but again, this seems to be a bigger risk. If the key is lost or, like the ridiculous way it seems to go in doujins, if you piss the keyholder off in some way, you'd have to go through a lot of trouble to get the thing off yourself, and all the while you can't cum. D: Alternatively I think this could be fun in a way provided everything went perfectly.
-Incest. Definitely not something I would do. Of course I feel this is very specific to the individual, and I don't think it would be wrong between consenting adults, but for me and I'm sure for the rest of my family it would be weird.
I guess it's more just the idea of family members without any real sort of identity being intimate together, and more so for the specific kind of situations it could bring about. Particularly one wherein a girl might be left in charge of her little brother in some way. Of course I don't condone anything non consensual, so this is just a fantasy as opposed to anything I'd give any real consideration to.
That's most of it, anyway. Probably some stuff I forgot. Feel free to check my F-list if you want, and to ask me any questions. If not here, then ask in PMs if you like.
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