...And a Baby Makes Three (Hayden Stone & Cosmic)

It wasn't as if she was regretting her decision. True, having bruises on her arms and finding out another woman was rolling around in her bed made her heart hurt more than ever--but there was strength in the fact that she was able to leave. Regardless of the fact that it felt like more of an excuse than a reason to. She shook her head, and moved into the next lane, readying for a turn.

Whether it was how she left, or the just the fact that she was going to be back with her best friend, Tessa's heart was pounding in her chest as she turned off the freeway into the city. The last time she was here, she was in college. Hell, she was still hopelessly in love with Houston. But now? She wasn't so sure she could even say she fell out of love. She smiled at the backlog of traffic remembering the walks she would take. She would need to sell this truck asap. She could get enough out of this old truck to at least get a deposit on an apartment of her own. Maybe even enough for first month's rent too.

She pulled into a parking lot next to the large-old style red brick apartment building. She looked at the green luminous clock on her dash. It was two in the morning. She sighed, resting her forehead on the steering wheel. It wasn't as if she didn't call before she showed up. So why did she feel that driving to the motel a few blocks down would be a much better option than attempting to go inside? It wasn't as if she didn't want to see her friend--it had nearly been three years since they saw each other in person and facebook could only provide so much. It was just different now. So different. She felt like a failure, a failure as a writer, a wife, a friend, and really as a person. She didn't think she could handle admitting that to someone. She sighed and killed the engine, grabbing her laptop out from behind her seat. A small silver ring rolled off the side of the case and down on her lap. She stared at her wedding ring, remembering her apathy and feigned happiness that day. Perhaps that's why he cheated on her and hated her. You can only pretend to be happy for so long.

With a sigh she open the door and got out of the truck, locking it before she let the door close. She walked around to the side grabbing her two duffle bags of clothes. She felt her ring slip out of her hand and she heard it roll off into the distance. It didn't even occur to her to look for it as she walked to the side entrance of the building. She pressed the buzzer to her friends apartment, too lost in her own world to hear the ring roll into the drain.

Hayden’s apartment was silent and dark. The girl was folded up on her sofa with a large blanket covering her legs as she flipped mindlessly through the TV channels. By now she would be in bed, if it weren’t for the last minute phone call. She still wasn’t sure what she’d think of the situation. Her friend Tessa had called, needing a place to stay until she was able to get onto her feet. Hayden didn’t mind the guest, per se, but she’d prefer it would’ve been at a better hour. But still, she was one of those friends who would bitch, but would still be there in the end.

Her long, dark brown waves fell over her shoulder as a faded chunk of bleached hair fell hidden behind some of the darker waves. Her brown eyes watched the TV carefully, pulling the blankets up as she finally settled on a channel to entertain her until her friend would come. There was a soft steam coming from the kitchen. Hayden was making a batch of tea.

In the past three years, her friend hadn’t seen anything that had changed about her. Her hair color, for one. Used to be blond but was now a darker tone. Her tattoos that have become her latest addiction. Or even her new place that she had fully purchased on her own and even had the extra bedroom just waiting for her best friend Tessa to come by. It wasn’t that she was completely upset about this new roommate, she just wasn’t sure what she was expecting. She didn’t keep in contact at all during those three years after her friend’s wedding. It was kind of like her friend just disappeared from reality. She never liked Tessa’s husband, anyways. Not that she liked any male figure in that aspect, but he was certainly not the warm and fuzzy kind of guy. Hayden was surprised that such a marriage had lasted so long. Deep down, she knew her best friend. She knew how unhappy her best friend was. Somedays, she felt guilty for not speaking up. But at least this was now all in the past.

The covers were pushed off as she heard the buzz of the front door. She turned on the living room light and got up, dressed in a loose white t-shirt and pj shorts as she answered the door with a smile. Wow. Three years, and it seemed like not a day had changed between them. “Hey!” She said, happy to see the familiar face, despite upset she could just sense from the girl. Obviously she’d be upset, divorces weren’t normally the happiest of occasions. “Oh here… Come on in.” Hayden said as she helped pick up one of Tessa’s bags as she let the girl come in so that they wouldn’t wake many of the neighbors.

It was a bit of a surprise, for sure. Though at the same time it's not as though Hayden changed a whole lot either. Yes her hair, her tattoos, even the energy around her felt different. But looking into those smiling eyes, all she saw was Hayden. She smiled despite herself and moved inside, dropping enough stuff to wrap her arms around the other woman.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to wake you. I just..." She shook her head. There was nothing to say really. She let go of her, following the other woman into her new room and plopping her bags near the bed. "I can't thank you enough for this, you really have no idea. I was going to stay with my mom but I couldn't exactly afford to buy a plane ticket all the way to Florida. Plus, last thing I need is her yelling at me for the divorce and Jesus's opinion on it." She sighed, finding a smile. "How have you been, this new place looks great. It's huge. Did you get it yourself? What have you been doing?" She realized the amount of questions falling out of her mouth dimly. It seemed kinda rude on one hand, but her excitement couldn't be contained. She was here. With Hayden. It was like a huge weight was lifted off of her. No more pretending to be happy, no more days of yelling and bullshit. No more living in fear.

"You look so different now." She observed sitting on her bed. "You must have some fantastic stories. I mean, when did all this happen?" She half joked looking the other woman up and down pointedly. "It's not bad or anything. Just surprising I suppose. I feel tame compared to you now." She chuckled lightly giving the other woman her best smile.

Hayden was bombarded. Perhaps if it wasn't 2am, and she didn't have such a long day, she'd be a bit more upbeat. But she was very tired, and the tea wasn't warming fast enough. She hugged the girl back. Mm. She missed it. They were really close, and seeing her again after all of this time was bittersweet. In one aspect, she was still mad that she had been putting off meeting with Hayden, but at the same time, she understood that the girl had a married life. All domestication did was bring a person down. It could completely tie wings that were meant to fly. Tessa needed to fly, and hopefully during her stay she could help her do so.

"Wow... I want what you're on." She joked, with a laugh as she saw how much abounded energy the girl had. She followed the girl in, shutting the door with her foot before leaning against the wall with a coy smile. She missed her. She didn't want to be too obvious. And for someone who had just had a horrible fight, she didn't want to bring down the happiness, either.

"Yea... lots can happen after three years." She said, giving the girl a joking "mad" face but then thought about what had gone down. "Well... my parents died and left a bit of a trust fund behind for my brother and I." She said. It was in a casual tone. She wasn't really going to ruin the moment with a tragedy. "Anyways, I used the money to pay for a good portion of this place."

Hayden looked around at her room. She could've cleaned up the place a bit more, but she didn't really have much notice. She cleared her throat at the thought. "Then I tried to launch my career, which is still in the process... that tattoos just kind of began to aquire. First one was from my parents, and after that... the rest is just little moments of history." She said, looking down her arm as a reminder of all of her artistic marks.

She grinned at the girl with her comment of being tame. "Don't worry. If we hang out anything compared to how we have before... you'll be out and wild in no time." She laughed, joking at their past. The colorful past, really. The two had quite a fun history of being together, experiencing together, and experiencing each other. Hayden didn't think much of it. She knew Tessa wasn't like that, but god, it was fun to just mess with her.

"Hey, thirsty? I have tea just about ready..." She said, pointing in the direction of the kitchen.

Tessa couldn't help it, shame crawled into her veins. She didn't expect Hayden to understand, it was being around her again. It was...seeing her. Smelling her. The warmth of her embrace and the sound of her voice. She missed that so much, to come back now it was like trying to sleep in Disney Land. Plus keeping the conversation focused on Hayden prevented it from coming back to her. That was a good thing considering the fact that she wasn't ready to talk about any of it. Yet the biggest problem was Hayden's anger at her showing up. She understood well enough that calling someone your best friend and then avoiding them for three years was hardly what a best friend would do. But she doubted the other woman could understand where she was coming from. Tessa was literally a prisoner in her own home for the last three years. If it wasn't Houston yelling, it was Houston breaking things. If he wasn't doing either of those things, he was guilting her into staying away from friends, or for not wanting to have sex, or whatever. He never wanted to let her go and she never wanted to be held. She honestly didn't blame him for it, but such a relationship impedes having a healthy social life.

Upon hearing about her parents she held back the urge to wrap Hayden up in her arms once more. Damn. She did not deserve to even be here right now did she? She closed her eyes for a moment thinking about something she could say, but the tone of Hayden's voice pointed out to her that she didn't want to talk about it. Plus she just got here so it wouldn't exactly be fair to open that can of worms yet. So instead she just uncrossed her arms and gave the punky woman her ear with a smile.

She listened to Hayden answer her questions, blush forming on her face. Leave it to Hayden to forgive her when she didn't exactly deserve it. "Don't worry. If we hang out anything compared to how we have before... you'll be out and wild in no time." Memories flew into her mind with a dizzying pace. That night that they...did things. Thank god she was drunk. After all, that's all it was. Crazy college girls and beer. Happens all the time. At the mention of tea she brightened.

"Sure. I...I don't mean to keep you up. I'm sorry. I mean you probably have work, and everything in the morning I'm just so happy to see you. It hasn't felt right not seeing you every day. I would have come over more...I just." She sighed. "I just wasn't quite ready to leave him yet. I don't think I'll ever forgive myself fully for wasting five years of my life on that piece of shit." her bitterness was more than evident as she followed her friend out of the room and into the kitchen. She went to the kitchen and started opening cupboards, not wanting to seem useless. I'll pour it, don't worry, go sit down, you are probably exhausted." She shut one cupboard and opened another, finding the mugs and taking two down. Now to find the tea bags....

Hayden watched Tessa, her arms gently crossing. She took in a deep breath. She couldn't get angry with her. At least not tonight. The girl obviously understood the betraying feeling that was left behind when the two left. But who was Hayden kidding? It wasn't like they were in a relationship. Just drunk college chicks. Yea. Hayden walked out to the steaming water and watched the girl with a light smile as she talked about keeping her up. Bullshit. It was already 2am. There was lost hope for both of them getting sleep. Maybe in an hour or so if the tea could settle in. Hayden stepped behind her, reaching up to the shelf for the box of tea as she set the box next to the girl's hand. She laughed at Tessa's words about her ex. "Maybe we'll need something a little stronger?" She asked with a light laugh. "I remember how that ended up."

Hayden walked over to the sofa, carelessly plopping her body onto the couch, pulling the blankets over her feet. She looked back to Tessa. She wouldn't argue with her. Not now. "Hey, remember Megan?" Hayden called to Tessa. Megan was Hayden's ex...well...current girlfriend. They had a constant on and off relationship. It was the only real relationship Hayden had in her life, and it was probably with the most ridiculous girl in town. But her and Megan had quite a fun time together. At least the sex, anyways. It was all the relationship was based on. The good side was that it was mutual. The two never got along personality wise. Such a misfortune to waste such great sex on. She smirked, thinking about the crazy girl and why she was even still putting up with the deadbeat.

Oh yea. The sex.

"M-megan?" Her voice was slightly higher than normal, thankfully Hayden wasn't in the room and couldn't see her white knuckling the tea kettle. She couldn't forget Megan. The beautiful girl who was more than just a little friendly to Hayden on more than one occasion. What upset her the most is that anyone could see what the girl was after the entire time. She was someone who had 'open relationships' whether you liked it or not. "She was in my poetry class I think." Where she consistently and constantly tried to get me to help her to get into your pants She asked as nicely as she could as she poured the hot water in the mugs and started to dig around for honey. "What about her?"

She didn't exactly hate Megan, and really, it was more of the fact that she was more than a little protective over Hayden. They use to joke about how when they argued, they did so like a married couple. But more than that, she loved Hayden. She wished nothing but happiness for her. Her being a lesbian really had nothing to do with their friendship, but it did make Tessa feel safer some how. More open in ways she couldn't quite explain. So when someone got in the middle of that, or worse yet, tried to hurt Hayden she was quick to anger. It's not like her and Hayden were a couple or anything (she had Houston after all) so it's not like she was jealous. Much.

She knew she shouldn't care. She really shouldn't. Of all people who had a right to get jealous or feel angry, Tessa Anders was far from the top of the list. Good god, the woman got married to an abusive asshole and was MIA for three years. She wasn't in the glass house, she was the glass house. She stirred a little honey into each cup and put it back in the cupboard. Walking out into the living room she handed one cup to Hayden. Sitting down she gave the other woman a smile, hopefully something she would read as cheery. "I haven't heard from her in ages either. I doubt she remembers me. I was just your oddball tag along back in those days, if I remember right." she joked sitting next to her on the couch.

Hayden gave a smile. It was a shameful smile. She knew what she was getting into. She played with the ends of her hair, a nervous habit. Why was she nervous talking about Megan with Tessa? The two were friends, right? She knew Tessa wasn't really a fan of Megan's...openness. But Hayden had gotten around that. It didn't phase her, anyways. It was best to have a no-strings-attached situation. Created less complications in her book.

"Yea...well, we ran into each other a couple weeks ago." She said, taking the cup with a small smile. "And, it's not that I think she's a completely new person but something is different about her."

When she spoke, she laughed lightly, bringing the hot cup of tea to her lips. "I sound like a broken record, right?" She looked over at Tessa, watching her reaction. She honestly had not had a real friend to sit down and talk to her. At least, a real friend who wouldn't jeapordize sex into their friendship. She wouldn't call their friendship complicated, but it was different than the rest. Even her straight friends would be curious. Sex ruined relationships for Hayden. End of story.

But with Tessa, she didn't push it or worry about it. She was one of the first situations where getting into bed wasn't the original goal. The two had been friends for so long, it just had hit her now how hard it has been for the past three years without her. It also didn't hit her how much she had changed without Tessa. If Tessa was still around, maybe there wouldn't be so many tattoos. Or, maybe Tessa would be inked as well. She took a threatening sip of the hot tea, wincing lightly before letting it calm. She always did that. A very impatient person when it came to any favorites of hers. Tea, coffee, dancing, music, waiting for Tessa for three years...

"I don't know." Was all she said, obviously in doubt of something.

"People...change I guess." Tessa said lightly, trying to think of a roundabout way of expressing her emotions. Hayden--for lack of a better word--had changed greatly. At least she obviously changed. Then again Hayden was also the more outgoing of the two. The one who was willing to bend in the wind. Tessa was not someone who jumped into "forever" quickly, so she remained inkless and didn't even have her ears pierced. Yet, contrary-wise she all but ran into Houston. Barely waiting two years before marrying him. Perhaps that was her tattoo now, a divorce. Nothing at all embarrassing or shameful about that.

"I honestly don't remember how she was before except she was quite...out. I guess that doesn't mean anything, I mean so were you. She did have a crush on you of sorts I guess." She said with a light shrug of her shoulders. "She isn't with a guy now is she?" She joked quietly, sipping her tea. "And don't worry about sounding like a broken record. It's jesus-fucking-christ late, and I am completely and totally enraptured with just listening to you speak. I'm sorta your biggest fan right now." It was a joke, but it felt awkward in her mouth. Sometimes a joke falls flat due to too much honesty.

"As far as being a different person...just look at us, Hayden. " She said slowly into her cup. "I'm happy you haven't made same mistakes as me. I'm happy you are still well...you. I'm not sure I can say the same thing about me, you know what I mean? After the wedding...It's like I put myself in a box and went into auto pilot. New music, new clothes, new everything. You evolved while I tried to go backwards. It's sad I consider it progress that I am drinking my old brand of tea." She ended in a small laugh. "And I sincerely hope that nobody is as quite behind on themselves as me. Including Megan."

Hayden sat back, listening to Tessa speak about change. She knew there was a lot of emotional stress on Tessa's plate anyways, and here she was dumping more emotional stress. She leaned on the arm rest of the sofa, watching her friend vent, just sitting there as someone who'd actually listen to her as a person. Hayden was a little irritated with her ex. No, she was extreamly irritated. And Hayden wasn't one to hold back an opinion, the opinion stood out quite strongly. However, those three years Tessa seemed to be happy. And who was Hayden to ruin the happiness? Initially, Tessa was sincerely happy. But then things changed and Hayden had picked up on the fights, the arguments, the change. She wasn't sure what changed Houston's attitude towards Tessa. Prior to the wedding, the couple seemed perfect. Sickenly perfect. Hayden remembered standing as a bridesmaid, watching her best friend confess vows that Hayden herself could never create. Not that Hayden didn't see herself settling down, but the power behind those words were so potent.

And to see it all go to shit really effeced Hayden. Perhaps that's why it was 2am and she was here still having Tessa's back. It was kind of a wake-up call, that things don't last forever. Her parent's death, the loss of Megan (and gain...and loss again...), and her career...it was all short-term. The past three years, Hayden has tried to get something, anything, that could be long-term for her life. Perhaps it was just her friendship with Tessa. But at least she had something.

She took in a breath, her tone changing from a curious one to a sincere one. "I'm really sorry about the marriage." It was something she was trying to avoid talking about because it even got herself riled up with anger and passion. She hated seeing Tessa being mistreated. She smirked lightly at the thought. "But you're not behind on yourself. You were fooled by love. Love is man's greatest fall... or something like that." Hayden said, waving it off. Has Hayden ever been in love? No. Of course not. She wouldn't sicken herself with such an illness. Call her bitter, call her pessimistic, but look at the facts. Love has never worked out in Hayden's favor. Perhaps that's why she was constantly in denial about her love life.

She looked back at the clock, seeing the time and knowing that tomorrow they'd have time to catch up and such. "I hate to cut our talk short... but it might be best if we call it a night." She said, rubbing her eyes again. "I have this job interview thing..." There was a hint of frustration to her voice.

"I hate it. I hate it all. Searching for a job is like searching for great sex." She said standing up. "Finding it is a bitch, and getting it doesn't last long." She shook her head, finishing off her tea. "Come on, I'll show you your room!" She said, happily. She clearly had put some effort into setting up a decent guest room for anyone to move into. She walked her down the narrow hall, there were some picture frames with Hayden's artwork displayed in them. She opened the door to a room, not very large, but enough to cozily fit a queen bed, a couple of nightstands, and a dresser into. The bedsheets were a clean white, with a burgandy focus wall, as well as light brown accent walls. "It's not much, but eventually we can add your little details into it." She said, with a small smile. There was another room, smaller across the hall from Tessa's new bedroom that could fit a desk, a bookshelf, and a printer. "That's the office area... if you need the computer or anything, you're free to use it." She said.

Her room was right at the end of the hall. Not much larger than Tessa's room, but the door was shut enough to not tell.

Tessa embraced the other woman, holding her close for a moment. Words were lost to her really, she couldn't explain the swell she felt in her heart or the rush at the fact she was here again. Between her and Hayden, words weren't always necessary for certain things. When she released the other woman (perhaps she hugged her for a little longer than she should have...judging by the awkward that suddenly crept through the doorway) she gave a grin, cocking her head slightly. "You are simply amazing. Someday I'll find a way to pay you back for this, but for now just accept my soul and call it even, okay?" she joked before giving a yawn. "Just wake me up in time to make you breakfast at least. And by breakfast I mean coffee and toast." She gave the brunette one final look before moving to the other side of the door. "Night Hayden." She spoke before closing the door, and nearly collapsing on her bed.


She was at peace. It was a slow realization for sure, but it was the only one that made sense. She didn't fool herself into thinking that life was going to be easy now, on the contrary she knew that she had years and years of things to process before her. But she still had Hayden, she didn't have Houston holding her down, and she was back in a place where the world was her oyster. College dreams came back and the idea of writing a book came back into her head, without quickly being followed by the thought of "when I have time." No, she would make time. Starting tomorrow when she heard Hayden wake up. She took off her sweater, shoes, jeans, and bra, folding them in a pile by her stuff before making a mental note to buy a hamper for her clothes when she could. Turning off her light she laid on her bed feeling her eye lids droop sleepily. Coffee. Toast. Hayden. Yeah. Fuck you, you cheating asshole. You were the one that lost--not me. And with that final thought, she close her eyes and went into a peaceful, dreamless sleep.

The hug brought memories to Hayden. Memories, which were "sworn" to never be brought up again. The scent of the girl hadn't changed, and with that delicate smell she remembered how water droplets would roll off of the girl's skin, or how the lips...

Hayden brought herself to reality, not wanting to but instead having her arms holding along Tessa's back, gently running her fingers along the forbidden fabric. She pulled back when Tessa did, completely taken over with thoughts of how Tessa was. She smirked lightly at her comment about breakfast. Nah, she'd let the girl sleep. She had a lot on her mind anyways. Plus, toast wasn't her thing. Not that she'd hate it if Tessa made it, but she'd rather have some kind of nutrition.

Hayden didn't really sleep all that much as tired as she was. There was a lot on her mind that caused her to stirr in the odd hours of the night. Things about Tessa, about Houston, about her work, job, career, house, place, payments, bills... she had quite a lot going on at once. To tie it all together, Megan. Megan? Hayden's eyes shot open as she heard her phone chiming a familiar tone. She quickly crawled over the bed to grab the cellular device before belly-flopping down and answering it with a weak "Hello?"

It was Megan. Megan wanted to come over. What time was it? Oh... 9am. Hayden turned onto her back. The girl was diagonal on the bed, contemplating if she wanted Megan to come over for breakfast. "Mmm... maybe not today. Okay?" It was obviously a statement that would upset Megan. God forbid Hayden didn't have time for the girl. But she didn't want to completely bombard her house. It wasn't the largest place, and she certainly wasn't in the mood to enertain. Or sleep with... anyone at this moment. She was tired. For the first time in the past three weeks, Hayden denied sex with Megan. That was quite impressive.

Anyways, the call was enough to get Hayden up out of bed and into the kitchen. She wasn't going to bother waking up Tessa until Breakfast was ready. She made an omlet that had tons of veggies mixed into it all, served with a small side of some cut-up fruit. She'd have to get more food for Tessa's likings. She wasn't even sure if the girl enjoyed her old brand of tea or not. But she had juice. She poured some juice and set the small glass table with some fun, green placemats, the plates, and juices. She smiled proudly at her ability to cook as she then smirked wanting to mess with Tessa. Oh come on, she would be bound to some pranks.

Hayden slowly opened the door and and saw Tessa asleep. She smirked, holding back her laugh as she ran up to her bed and pounced right next to Tessa on the bed. She laid there, looking at the girl with a wide grin. She saw the Tessa was topless, but it was the morning, and Tessa was her friend, so she gently pulled the blankets up to cover her....regretfully.

"Hey Sleeping Beauty, breakfast is ready." She said to the girl in a low voice, laughing lightly.