Jewels & Rage [Ginger's journal]

I decided to make my first entry on how I came into RP and what kept me in this game for so long, and what I mean by so long is by a few years or so on facebook, and another three years on a Harry Potter forum. I recently got my IP banned from that IP for uttering more slang towards hate and pussy than I should have, but I honestly was getting tired of being so...not allowed to swear, holier than thou, bs. So we will end that story short and go back to the beginning.

With facebook it started with character RP, one on one, and nothing funny. We took the writing very serious until that site started to change and fans looking to add the "real" Harry Potter were always getting our accounts deleted. So I guess you can understand the tiresome days we passed wondering if we would log into an account that is active or had been deleted.

Then I moved to the HP forums where I was welcomed, made year three and then got my IP banned for swearing more than I should have. Honestly I was swearing to people in private, no harm was done, just a simple fuck yea or that bitch better put out tonight...*shifts eyes* Not that it's all I ever wanted, you know? It's complicated.

I grew up with very few friends in RP and kept it that way until things got dark and I had to say goodbye to my childhood by growing up and gaining a new responsibility and that involved a job at blockbuster and bills to pay at home. I still live with my family but was recently fired. I went online to rant to my friends about it and guess I mentioned pussy one too many times and got myself banned from the HP site.

Instead of trying to get myself back onto the site, I said forget it and looked up adult RP forums and found this site. Played with the idea of joining. I mean really, you have to question yourself these days before joining any site. Especially when you don't know what you're getting yourself into. However I liked the general idea, the open forums gave me a chance to view what I was getting into. Instead of a private forum where you have to sign all this bullshit and then find out you got yourself sucked into the penitentiary of role play. Plus they wouldn't ban me for mention pussy too much. I hope not cause it's my favorite curse word. Fucking pussy is second

That's it for now, I guess I will be updating this as much as I possibly can.

So Halloween was more than I could ever anticipate. The majority of the family had been alright I sit this one out, only to find out the other half of the fam would join us from out of town. These guys are the "No-no-no's" and "you must" kind of people. Well my Aunt is an "Ahhhhhyeahno." Sort, either way. I ended up skipping Halloween with a few friends online to storm door to door for treats. None of those treats would go to me either.

Oh what was I? An evil Disney Princess, Cinderella who wore a pair of slutty spider webbed stockings and a funky Princess gown. I added a sheer black fabric and shredded the other half of it so that it was just above my knees. Instead of the stupid crown that came with, I replaced that with a skull headband. I wore my black and red studded leather fitted jacket (for the animal lovers, it wasn't real leather). My hair like Helena Bonham Carter and my make-up a little like the hookers who covered Patti La Belle's "Lady Marmalade"

On top of that I wore my hooker heels; the boots that go up to my knees and a little past my thighs. You see, I don't really appreciate my family. You may think I do but I don't. I'm that weird kid that likes to upset the fam to the finest edge. Now before I get all bad ass and tell you about the life I've lived (saving for another blog), I'll just say. The hooker heels. Bad idea. My hands and knees are all scraped up and a good pair of slutty stockings gone to waste with tares, holes and blood stains. Not in a good way either. This city wasn't made for heels, I kept stepping into pot holes and stumbling on street rebel.

However, my Uncle's step-kid was willing to share half his bag of candy with me, d'aaaawwww. Then after I sucked back on a jaw breaker lollipop, I remembered why I hate candy. Only now I remember, because my teeth are filmy and gross. I just know, even after I brush my teeth and a few rounds of listerine won't take away that gross taste lingering in my mouth. Meh! Won't hurt, I should try it. Well that's where I've been in the past few days. Tomorrow the fam that visited is getting a big send off. I've always wondered, why do family out of town get more treatment than those who are in town, even the ones on the outskirts of town don't get the special treatment. Oh well.

Hope you all had a safe Halloween, may all your teeth rot in peace xp

So, this is what it's boiled down to? A gentle purr and a happy thanksgiving, well belated happy thanksgiving. I never understood why people had to say gobble gobble, to me, that was just wrong. Anyway, this is an update and an apology for my leave of absence thing. Which goes along with a long distance rant after a few emotional breakdowns.

Here we go...

A long time ago, we decided to join up with this doctor, good with the fam, bitchy with the patients sort of deal. Well, this guy was all in it for the cash. I mean, "You pay? You pay? You Pay" sort of deal. I'm not sure if doctors get paid to diagnose people with things or not but apparently I don't have asthma. Yeah...We're gonna get to that soon.

On the fourth of November, we get a call from the hospital, my Grandma has gone through to the emergency. So, things get quiet. I get anxious. Then the doctor calls, his voice quivers as he speaks to my father, but announcing to the rest of the anxious family, including yours truly (Yeah I've had time to put this into detail). "You're mother is suffering from a severe heart disease." Silence, as we wait for him to continue. However as he goes on, foggy frames of my childhood involving my grandmother flash before my eyes.

So, by the sixth, we're told that everything is possible, preventable and we must act now. Hundreds of dollars and I don't just mean what we could afford, but from our rent, our bills, and groceries are all put into this hospital transfer. My dad doesn't want one family member missing if she should (heaven forbid), pass away during the operation. We go to this specialized city of doctors and surgeons. Sit amongst the waiting, only for my grandmother to be put through a series of tests.

"A heart disease is very common," the nurse tells us, however as the days go by and more and more tests are sent to be examined. We sit, distraught and torn that we have to wait this long to have our family member saved. I broke down several times, you see, Granny took care of me for seven years of my life. So I'm drawn close and hurt (not more) but easily by any notion of loss. As time drifts on and every hour closer to the final date, November 26 (which was all we've managed to pay for in the round trip). We find. Thee most. Loathsome and disturbing truth.

Our doctor had lied.

All tests proved my grandmother perfectly healthy, the only cause for her heart to bugger on like a hummingbird was because of gas. Luckily Grandma was open to flatulent exposure, otherwise I wouldn't have mentioned it. The doctors had followed through with another tests for anything intestinal or gallbladder and stuff, but nothing.

Now with that I draw my curiosity, do doctors get paid to send a patient off to a new city to be analyzed and prodded by other doctors like a lab rat?

However, on the bright side. I did get quite a lot of amazing deals on the BF sales. We just got back and I am more than dreadfully tired. So I shall be off now.