Writing characters of the oppisite Gender...

This, I've always been curious about. Many authors of many stories I've noticed tend to have the main character have the same gender as them. Of course there are many exceptions like J.K Rowling or Ursala Le Guin. Plus there are a host of male authors who write incredible female secondary characters and protagonists. When you write a character of the opposite gender, do you base them of people you know in real life, or do you shape them into the ideal girl or boy you'd would love to be with. Or do you do something else all together.

Me: I tend to write them as the ideal girl I'd like to have. More and more, as I continue to write, I find myself trying to give more variations to the female characters even going as far as giving them my own flaws and attributes.

So what do you think, When you write the character of an opposite Gender, what kind of how do you write them and what kind of characteristics do you give them. Are they more masculine, more Feminine?

It varies, for me. In a way, I think they're idealized a bit. Certainly, most of them are free of the typical sexist baggage. But they've all got their flaws and advantages.

Mostly, I try and write my characters as people first, with motivations and humor and histories and such, with their gender influencing all of that but not being the main point of it. How many male characters are all about being a Man? No, they're more about being Explorers, or Warriors, or Detectives, and they don't really doubt their masculinity, it's just a part of them. I try and write my female characters the same way. Er, but with femininity.

I have done some chatroom crossdressing, in the past, and yes, my character there was something of an idealized woman I'd love to meet. But I found myself actually feeling like I was reacting more like a woman, like getting annoyed at the sexism, sticking up for my fellow women on the boards... was I just disappearing into character? I suppose that's why I was more convincing than some guys who do the same thing.

MM You will always be our sexy non-gendered Narwhal^^

As goes for me, I do both male and female characters. I am not the type who just goes all out on doing female roles though, I prefer my males over my females as they are the closest to myself. I'm more of an underground guy though, I grew up with Need For Speed and The Fast and The Furious series as well as some of the first RTS games so I prefer my characters being with secrets, most of the time underground racing but other times open secrets such as a gaming addiction.

My female characters on the other hand, they are rarely shy, more outgoing because I am quite closed in my own world really, though when I do go out, I always make a rather heavy impression of people that don't know me. Take an example with my hockey team, I was the big guy (size wise, not height) on the team but as it was, I proved myself able to pass perfectly and play my position as well as learn it pretty easily. I use a lot of that on my girls, making them outgoing and friendly, though unlike me they get easily tipsy.

I guess in the end, I begun female roles because it bored me for some time to do male roles.

Non-gendered!

Those I have spirited off to the Nar-cave for hours of ... well, let's just say they don't have any question about my gender.

But I write a good female, is what I'm trying to say, up there.

When it comes to RPing, my main character will always always always be female. This is solely because I'm female and thus feel I can best relate. That doesn't mean I won't write for a male secondary character, however this secondary character will be superficial compared to my main female. At present, I think the closest I've come to writing for a male character that isn't a main character, though very close, is one where he's a psychopathic killer. Weirdly, this actually makes things easier on me. Given that he's not of sound mind and more or less a deviant, it gives me room to do what I'd like with him despite the fact that I'm a female writing for a male character.

Now, in my stories I write that are NOT for RPs, I will write both female and male interchangeably as my main characters. I tend to make my males into the sort I find myself typically attracted to in real life. Strong, dominant, introverted and smart. More often than not, I give them major flaws as well. I do this because, in real life, I'm the sort of person who loves unconditionally (not to mention quite fiercely) and thus like the idea of my male character having a flaw that most might not be able to get past or would at least have issues with in the beginning. Now whether my male characters are believably male? I'd like to think so, but given that they're for solo stories, my feedback on such things is a bit more limited. However, those who've read excerpts from my stories all would tell you that my male characters are written relatively well. Given that, here's to hoping they're actually correct!

This is an interesting thing to read.

While I'm a female behind the screen, I loathe playing female characters. I don't identify with being a female. Everything that feels or appears as female is normally something I avoid as it's... uncomfortable. I've always disliked women as I've grown up, even though I had a strong maternal influence as a child. There's just too much emotion and drama that seems to seep from the pores of women that just makes them a huge pain in the ass to deal with mentally. This is the sole factor as to why I don't have hardly any female friends in real life.

However, I don't feel this way for ALL women. A good share of my friends here own vaginae and I'm quite happy to know all of them. They all have different personalities, they all have different backgrounds, and they all tend to be pretty opinionated. On the flip side, I do see females making the most fuss/drama/emotional pile of shit than males. I've seen this numerous times growing up, in the many places I've worked, and constantly online. I feel this is partially because females are biologically made for vocalization and emotions as those were their survival mechanisms oh so many years ago. It still works today. When it comes to men, they are more likely to store their emotions and word things more carefully as their brain is biologically set up for action, pushing their emotional center further back in the brain closest to the physical activity area in the brain.

But what does this pertain to RPing? Well, when I play female characters, they are pretty much men with tits. I don't like what's considered an average or normal female. They appear weak to me and I don't enjoy weak characters. Mostly men have been in my life as mentors or teachers or people I admire. They've always been a strong or caring person, never causing utter emotional chaos. The women I've had to deal with in my life have been the biggest and worst liars, cheats, manipulators, thieves, sluts, extortionists, gluttons, and general meanness. My exposure to men and women have cut a clear path for which sex I'd prefer to be around, to play in video games, to play in RPs, and to be attracted to.

With all the exposure to men, I've also found it's easier and more comfortable to play men in RPs as I know them better. When I play women, I feel like I have to force them out and their actions and responses. None of it comes naturally at all and it can be annoying to do. Only once in a blue moon have I felt the desire to play a female, but they tend to be damaged goods to make them more functional to me.

Now, when it comes to actually writing the male characters, I try to have him have something I like about him. I don't want him to be the ideal man for me as I have about 20 different ideal men for me. As my mood shifts, so does what think is an ideal man. For the most part, none of my male characters are too much alike. I like keeping them mostly different as there is a real variety in real life.

The biggest point I've always forced mysself to remember when trying to rp as a female, or right from a woman's perspective, is that beneath all the gender roles, societal norms, psychology, and "human nature", we're all human, and tend to have the same needs and desires. Using that as a core, i start looking at the other points as building blocks for how this is expressed. how does the society i'm writng about expect each gender to behave. An Amazonian, Gorean, and Modern Day culture would all have different mind sets for the behavior of each. does the psychology of sex for love and love for sex hold true in the world I'm creating. what constitutes human nature. Does this person defy these points in some way. while it may seem complicated, I've yet to create a character i couldn't look at and say, yes they are their gender. with a little practice, this soon became second nature when creating any char. Hell i had my WoW guild convinced i was female for a year until i hopped on vent.

I don't have many problems with creating characters of opposite genders; the trick is to have a distance. Remembering that you are not your character. That you are only a passive observer. And letting the story flow....

I think shaping any character into the 'ideal character' is a very, very bad idea. All people have flaws, and therefore all characters should too. But anyway, I know plenty of writers who write the opposite gender even better than their own. Take Anne Rice for example. I personally loved her books that focused on male characters, whereas her later female-focused novels were not very good at all. Personally, I don't really notice that much of a difference in my writing as a male. Most of the time any sexual feelings are for females instead of males, and of course their bodies are different, but how they act and what they believe all depends on their culture; it's the same with female characters.

As my character is never meant to be myself I have no trouble being either gender. I think of males and females as all being human and fundamentally the same in their spectrum of emotions. I don't let gender have much impact on the character, although my male characters are sometimes more logical and analytical than most of my females and my females are usually more intellectual and emotional, of course there are exceptions.

As I am never playing anyone meant to be me, or my persona, or alter-ego it's always a challenge to think "What would he/she do in this situation?" gender makes no difference.

dramamine213 said:

This is an interesting thing to read.

While I'm a female behind the screen, I loathe playing female characters. I don't identify with being a female. Everything that feels or appears as female is normally something I avoid as it's... uncomfortable. I've always disliked women as I've grown up, even though I had a strong maternal influence as a child. There's just too much emotion and drama that seems to seep from the pores of women that just makes them a huge pain in the ass to deal with mentally. This is the sole factor as to why I don't have hardly any female friends in real life.

*snip*

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I am the exact opposite! I feel no shame in telling BMR I want to be a girl more than anything. I don't hate my male body, I love video games and kung fu movies, and much of my time is spent thinking of throwing girls down and having my way with them. But if I could snap my fingers and change my life and history to have grown up female, and be female, I would. For many many reasons. I may be a lesbian, I'm not sure, but I would love it. I never will change, for reasons of expense, social ostracization (did I spell that right?) and medical. (I have big heart problems, pacemaker, I think it'd just be too dangerous to have more un-needed surgery when I get them every 5 years already)

I play characters of both genders because I have long since given up hope of being what I really want to and made peace that I'll spend this life like this. I can still be happy, I can still enjoy my body, I just really hope there's a character select screen in Heaven. Since I don't know that there is yet, I make one here on Earth in the form of RP. It allows me to escape into that side of myself that I NEVER, EVER let out of the box IRL. The only woman who knows is the only woman I've slept with. RPing a girl is therapeutic, and even in a hetero scene with a guy I love it. I am not into yaoi, I tried forcing myself to be with a man I loved once (it was a net thing, where bodies don't matter) but as I suspected I couldn't, and had to stop it before it went anywhere cause it was just not me. Which, incidentally, is how I know sexual orientation to not be a choice, even though some choose to lie about theirs even to themselves. But if I am a female it's different. I could be with a guy if I had that body. I know I can love a male, just not a male body, not with this one.

Wow, I'm really ranting here... but as for how I play them? The girl I'd want to be, sometimes. I pretended to be a woman online for over a decade, three years ago I would've been lying my ass off about my real self to you guys. I've grown past that, thank goodness. No one ever suspected unless I told them, after the first two years or so. So I like to think I'm pretty good at it, though my RP girls are often admittedly NOT made to be realistic. But to the original question, it depends, really, on the RP. Sometimes I play slutty ho-bags, sometimes sweet little things who get confused every time you say the word 'genitals'. But that's because my RP is WIDE and varied. I play so many different kinks and levels of sex vs. plot, it's crazy. Whether they are real, tapping into my own desires and femininity... or just from the part of my brain saturated in male chemistry... it depends on what the RP means to me. If you just want dirty sex, you get the shallow side of me that tells me I'd probably be a HORRIBLE slut if I had the female power of such easy sex. If you make it deeper, draw me in with plot and romance... you may just see a side of me that you'd be surprised at, that I don't let out often. You get out what you put in.

..... wow, that sounded slutty.....

LOL - I'm a yaoi RPer and this would be my first time in a hetero-anything since I discovered yaoi manga three years ago. So I write as a boy...and in my yaoi forum, gay men usually want to RP with me, either I'm their sub or they are my sub (moi loves D/s).

I write really depending on what my partner and I agreed on. If he wanted a fiesty sub, that's what he's going to get and if he wants a cruel Dom, he'll be getting that from me too. What's harder really for me is how to write realistically about having a hard-on because physically, it's the opposite from my being a female LOL.

But my male Doms are really cruel and sadistic, so I guess they get to act out all my frustrations as a girl and all my subs really just want to please. Or actually, they just love a lot - they end up getting married to their Doms. But that is opposite to me because I'm really aloof in RL. I think I write more, not based on gender but rather the power-play in the relationship.

Since I love D/s, I guess power is the real aphrosidiac for me.

Many of my reasons mix with what everyone said here, character's personality first, gender second. I do write for my "Ideal guy", but not for the guy I want to be with, but for the "If I dated a mad scientist, he'd be [BAM]", or "If I dated thief, he'd be [POW]", but that only goes with how they act romantically and sexually, since I have my kinks I'm into, and I can't write what I'm not into (this doesn't mean my characters possess all my kinks, or that they each have the same kinds... sometimes), it's just how I write, but same goes for my females. I have the ability to put the genitals aside from my mind when I'm thinking about creating a character, so I'm even able to think of what type of sexy girl I'd make. I like making all my characters interesting, and for them to be interesting (since every last person have unique thoughts on what's interesting), I would most likely make them my interesting, but I would always use my RP partner's ideal whatever to help build the perfect character we both can enjoy.

It's not hard to write in the opposite gender for me, but someone might think I make my men too effeminate; always thinking about their fashion, dramatic, sometimes even sensitive (trust me, it isn't cuddly when it comes to me). But the big surprise here, I like effeminate boys; I don't know why, I just find men who bitch and moan like girls to be attractive, men who can't stop shopping, and fixing their looks, that's just a turn on for me. I like weird guys too, so I even like it when guys wear effeminate things (not dresses and pink, or anything to that extreme, though heels~... non-cutesy heels...) like tight, sparkly/shiny, bright, ribbon adorn clothing, or certain makeup (nail polish, even; as long as it's practical, and not something like flowers or hearts or something). Because I like this, and because I like weird guys, I often make my men character strange; if approved by my partner, of course. So a lot of my guys are ideas of what I think is attractive/interesting, and I believe every single person does that, because if you're not attracted/interested in your own character, than you should stop writing with them (you just need to make sure you're not the only one that feels he/she's attractive).

Also, I do make both my gender characters off of people I have experienced, and I really do it when I'm writing guys; because all around, I'm not a guy, and I don't want to be, so it's hard for me to think and act like them, I can only make guesses, since I'm a real good observer, and can think of many reasons why a male would do what he does (same goes for other women, as we're all not the same). So it's kind of like writing different roles than gender, I have no more knowledge of being man than I have with being an elf, but I still write as one.

Im a female but I more closely identify with males, so all of my characters are male with minor female characters. I have characters that rage from feminine males to masculine females, to uber subs and uber doms. However, not in a way thats completely unattractive. For the most part I've noticed that a select few of my characters are based solely on one emotion or an impulse i get.

Like, i have an impulse to hurt myself randomly sometimes for no particular reason. instead of doing it I created a character based around this premise with some of my everyday flaws.