Hello, ladies and Bruces! The friendly neighbourhood mad scientist is looking to move away from the mundanity of modernity, escape the tedium of today, and enter fantastical fututres, peer into the past, and... Okay, I'm out of rhymes, but you get the gist.
Before we start: I prefer PMs, but I can do Discord. I evade e-mail, but can think about threads.
Hah. I knew I could fit in some more rhymes.
So! Before we start, I'm sure you'd like to know what I want to play, and what I'd like to avoid. But as Pete Townshend so eloquently put it: "Don't pretend that you know me, 'cause I don't even know myself". ... Okay, that is half a lie. I know some things I like, and I know some of my limits. Let's go over the no-no's first, so we can end that topic on a high note! ... And no, I don't mean drugs.
... Maybe a joint.
No-nos:
Blood (only in terms of smut. Grisly scenes are fun, but nothing I find sexual.)
Scat and watersports. Well, the wakeboarding kind of watersports is fine. But I'm not into Baywatch fandom. Fuck it, you get the idea.
MxM/FxF. I don't get off on it. ... What's that? Homophobe? I'm an actor, I can't afford to be.
Vore. I tried it once. It just left me bored and slightly hungry.
Massive gangbangs. Some of the magic disappears when it's diluted. Obviously, I'm not into homeopathy, either.
OOC flirting. ... Okay, that one's a lie. But no SERIOUS OOC flirting.
Straight-up mind control. I'm all for mad science and such, but if you arn't going to actually control your own character, I might as well play with a chatbot. ... Now there's an idea...
Right, those are my hard nos. Anything beyond that can be discussed. Now let's move on to stuff I enjoy!
Consent? Yes, no, maybe, dubious... Take your pick. But stay away from the diamond pick, I need that to build nether portals.
BDSM. Let's whip out the toys! (See what I did there?)
Mystery and riddles. I like feeling all clever and superior, like any good narcissist.
Familial pairings. If you like these, tell me. I incest.
Fur? I can do fur. The faux fur industry has come a long wa - oh, you mean furry characters. Sure, bring the fuzz. Not the cops, though! I need to clear out my basement first.
Serious plots. Let's make a gripping story!
Silly plots. Shits n' giggles! (This also happens to be a good name for a stand-up club that serves kebab.)
Darker plots. Let's sing the ram's song! (Bonus points if you get this.)
Lighter plots. I'd give you a joke about this, but I left it in my other pants.
Right. Let's put up da rulez.
1: Don't fluff the posts up just to hit a word count. Just tell me she's blushing, don't give me the life story of every capillary in her cheeks.
2: Don't serve me consistent one-liners. If there's back-and-forth dialogue, that's one thing, but I don't want to feel like I'm texting a distant cousin who's currently preoccupied with a football match.
3: Joke and be merry! I'm dosed up on too many antidepressants to tolerate people who can't crack a smile.
4: If there's something you like, tell me. I'm not going to judge you. In fact, I'm not sure I can even serve on a jury.
5: Third-person past tense. The story is about our characters, not us. Besides, my shift key is kind of shifty, so when writing, i have trouble capitalizing letters properly.
6: Pull your weight. I want to write with you, not for you. Unless you're willing to pay. ... Or would that be cyber-prostitution? I'll have to call my lawyer.
Seven: Be consistent. Don't jump formats in the middle of the story, or you'll just throw me off.
Eight: I will make stupid jokes and references both in and out of the roleplay.
Nine: By replying to this request thread, you agree to the above rules, terms, and conditions, and waive all rights to make any claims, financial or otherwise, for any damage, injury, or offense caused to you through your interactions with me.
Phew! That was a lot of stuff to write. I feel like I've been writing for hours. I must've written half a novel's worth of pa - WHAT!? ONE PAGE?
I have to write MORE!?
Fine, let's go over some basic pairings, then. I'll be bold, you'll be italic.
Brother/sister
Father/daughter
Master/pet
Master/slave
Coach/pupil
Rich guy/poor girl
Hylian/gerudo
Gladiator/patrician lady
Survivors (many possibilities here)
Demigod(ess)/Titan(ess)
Psychologist/Sex addict
Scientist/Test subject or experimental lifeform
Just to name a few.
Alright! On to plots! Let's start with SERIOUS PLOTS.
The Desert Blossom Festival: Throughout Hylian history, the Gerudo people have been very protective of their desert homeland. But the question about gerudo procreation has had many answers. Many Gerudo women travel Hyrule for their work, and will frequently find partners on the way. Some even take work as concubines or prostitutes, as Gerudo society has no rules against this practise, and don't expect monogamy from its people. Some Gerudo even go so far as to pay large sums for the privilige of carrying children by strong Hylian men. But by far the most successful and culturally signifigant way, has been the Desert Blossom Festival. Every fifteen months, Gerudo settlements lift the ban on males and host lavish festivals dedicated to love, sex, and fertility. Men from all over Hyrule are encouraged to join for eleven days of frantic celebration. The Gerudo prowl the festivals looking for mates, and younger Gerudo tribeswomen and Hylian boys are matched by their elders so both can enter the ranks of the adults. Our story takes place in one of these festivals. Will it be a quick romp in the hay? A blooming romance between two people? Or maybe two youths will go on an adventure, and discover the pleasures of flesh and love?
Kinks: Almost any, apart from noncon and dubcon.
Type 3 Heaven: Humanity dominates the galaxy. Its population exceeds countless trillions, and the deeply interconnected galaxy has built hundreds of megastructures, including computers capable of simulating entire universes. Our characters are two very old and very wealthy people, about to retire. For their retirement, they plan to upload their minds into a simulated universe indistinguishable from paradise - and what they find, is a world of absolute excess, and absolute depravity. Will they play themselves to exhaustion, explore new and otherwise impossible kinks? And will they fall in love in the process?
Kinks: Literally anything, as the simulated universe's rules adjust to suit our characters' needs and desires.
Vault 66: As Vault-Tec were constructing various vaults to perform experiments on people, trying to create a 'perfect' society, some Vault-Tec scientists recognized the need for natural experiments of the old school. With the government's ethics boards out of the way, they could build a vault designed entirely around a central eugenics program, based on S.P.E.C.I.A.L. attributes and personal proclivities. Our characters, both unwilling subjects of the program, are put together in squalid conditions, and told that our conditions will improve with each child we have.
Kinks: Pregnancy/breeding, with room for additional stuff
Okay! Let's move on to SILLY PLOTS!
Supervillain Weekly: In a universe full of superheroes and supervillains, our characters are a team of journalists interviewing supervillains worldwide for the pupular magazine Supervillain Weekly. Sometimes, they are forced to do some questionable things to gain their scoops... but one day, a supervillain demands a personal, live sex show in exchange for an exclusive. How will our characters, who have always been friends but never lovers, react?
Kinks: BDSM and exhibitionism. If you want to pull a brother/sister thing into this, I'll love you all the more.
The Ten Arbitrary Commandments: One day, God drops by Earth and simply changes the ten commandments. Thou shalt covet thy neighbour. Thou shalt steal. In the process, society predictably collapses entirely. What used to be virtues are now sins, and what used to be sins are now virtues. Will our characters be members of a flock for the new age, devoutly following the new commandments? Or just two people trapped in the chaos? Maybe they'll be a pair of extremely confused angels?
Kinks: Take your pick.
And finally, we have MIXED PLOTS!
That Damned Chip: In the distant future, mind-altering chips are a thing, and slavery is on the rise. These behaviour-altering implants are really more control centres and factories for nanobots than actual chips, but they are still the main tool for controlling the enslaved population. However, in this story, the slave's chip is glitched, causing erratic and potentially hilarious behaviour at random times.
Kinks: Dubcon, mind control, master/slave.
Well, That Didn't Go As Planned: An expert in the field of genetics has tried to create the perfect servile species, with a submissive nature comparable to dogs, but with the intelligence and physical characteristics of a human. The idea is to create the perfect pet, and the first specimen is about to finish its accelerated maturing program. All the math is correct, all the data has been triple-checked. What could possibly go wrong, right?
Kinks: More open-ended than it may first appear, since what went wrong is mostly in your hands.
Before we start: I prefer PMs, but I can do Discord. I evade e-mail, but can think about threads.
Hah. I knew I could fit in some more rhymes.
So! Before we start, I'm sure you'd like to know what I want to play, and what I'd like to avoid. But as Pete Townshend so eloquently put it: "Don't pretend that you know me, 'cause I don't even know myself". ... Okay, that is half a lie. I know some things I like, and I know some of my limits. Let's go over the no-no's first, so we can end that topic on a high note! ... And no, I don't mean drugs.
... Maybe a joint.
No-nos:
Blood (only in terms of smut. Grisly scenes are fun, but nothing I find sexual.)
Scat and watersports. Well, the wakeboarding kind of watersports is fine. But I'm not into Baywatch fandom. Fuck it, you get the idea.
MxM/FxF. I don't get off on it. ... What's that? Homophobe? I'm an actor, I can't afford to be.
Vore. I tried it once. It just left me bored and slightly hungry.
Massive gangbangs. Some of the magic disappears when it's diluted. Obviously, I'm not into homeopathy, either.
OOC flirting. ... Okay, that one's a lie. But no SERIOUS OOC flirting.
Straight-up mind control. I'm all for mad science and such, but if you arn't going to actually control your own character, I might as well play with a chatbot. ... Now there's an idea...
Right, those are my hard nos. Anything beyond that can be discussed. Now let's move on to stuff I enjoy!
Consent? Yes, no, maybe, dubious... Take your pick. But stay away from the diamond pick, I need that to build nether portals.
BDSM. Let's whip out the toys! (See what I did there?)
Mystery and riddles. I like feeling all clever and superior, like any good narcissist.
Familial pairings. If you like these, tell me. I incest.
Fur? I can do fur. The faux fur industry has come a long wa - oh, you mean furry characters. Sure, bring the fuzz. Not the cops, though! I need to clear out my basement first.
Serious plots. Let's make a gripping story!
Silly plots. Shits n' giggles! (This also happens to be a good name for a stand-up club that serves kebab.)
Darker plots. Let's sing the ram's song! (Bonus points if you get this.)
Lighter plots. I'd give you a joke about this, but I left it in my other pants.
Right. Let's put up da rulez.
1: Don't fluff the posts up just to hit a word count. Just tell me she's blushing, don't give me the life story of every capillary in her cheeks.
2: Don't serve me consistent one-liners. If there's back-and-forth dialogue, that's one thing, but I don't want to feel like I'm texting a distant cousin who's currently preoccupied with a football match.
3: Joke and be merry! I'm dosed up on too many antidepressants to tolerate people who can't crack a smile.
4: If there's something you like, tell me. I'm not going to judge you. In fact, I'm not sure I can even serve on a jury.
5: Third-person past tense. The story is about our characters, not us. Besides, my shift key is kind of shifty, so when writing, i have trouble capitalizing letters properly.
6: Pull your weight. I want to write with you, not for you. Unless you're willing to pay. ... Or would that be cyber-prostitution? I'll have to call my lawyer.
Seven: Be consistent. Don't jump formats in the middle of the story, or you'll just throw me off.
Eight: I will make stupid jokes and references both in and out of the roleplay.
Nine: By replying to this request thread, you agree to the above rules, terms, and conditions, and waive all rights to make any claims, financial or otherwise, for any damage, injury, or offense caused to you through your interactions with me.
Phew! That was a lot of stuff to write. I feel like I've been writing for hours. I must've written half a novel's worth of pa - WHAT!? ONE PAGE?
I have to write MORE!?
Fine, let's go over some basic pairings, then. I'll be bold, you'll be italic.
Brother/sister
Father/daughter
Master/pet
Master/slave
Coach/pupil
Rich guy/poor girl
Hylian/gerudo
Gladiator/patrician lady
Survivors (many possibilities here)
Demigod(ess)/Titan(ess)
Psychologist/Sex addict
Scientist/Test subject or experimental lifeform
Just to name a few.
Alright! On to plots! Let's start with SERIOUS PLOTS.
The Desert Blossom Festival: Throughout Hylian history, the Gerudo people have been very protective of their desert homeland. But the question about gerudo procreation has had many answers. Many Gerudo women travel Hyrule for their work, and will frequently find partners on the way. Some even take work as concubines or prostitutes, as Gerudo society has no rules against this practise, and don't expect monogamy from its people. Some Gerudo even go so far as to pay large sums for the privilige of carrying children by strong Hylian men. But by far the most successful and culturally signifigant way, has been the Desert Blossom Festival. Every fifteen months, Gerudo settlements lift the ban on males and host lavish festivals dedicated to love, sex, and fertility. Men from all over Hyrule are encouraged to join for eleven days of frantic celebration. The Gerudo prowl the festivals looking for mates, and younger Gerudo tribeswomen and Hylian boys are matched by their elders so both can enter the ranks of the adults. Our story takes place in one of these festivals. Will it be a quick romp in the hay? A blooming romance between two people? Or maybe two youths will go on an adventure, and discover the pleasures of flesh and love?
Kinks: Almost any, apart from noncon and dubcon.
Type 3 Heaven: Humanity dominates the galaxy. Its population exceeds countless trillions, and the deeply interconnected galaxy has built hundreds of megastructures, including computers capable of simulating entire universes. Our characters are two very old and very wealthy people, about to retire. For their retirement, they plan to upload their minds into a simulated universe indistinguishable from paradise - and what they find, is a world of absolute excess, and absolute depravity. Will they play themselves to exhaustion, explore new and otherwise impossible kinks? And will they fall in love in the process?
Kinks: Literally anything, as the simulated universe's rules adjust to suit our characters' needs and desires.
Vault 66: As Vault-Tec were constructing various vaults to perform experiments on people, trying to create a 'perfect' society, some Vault-Tec scientists recognized the need for natural experiments of the old school. With the government's ethics boards out of the way, they could build a vault designed entirely around a central eugenics program, based on S.P.E.C.I.A.L. attributes and personal proclivities. Our characters, both unwilling subjects of the program, are put together in squalid conditions, and told that our conditions will improve with each child we have.
Kinks: Pregnancy/breeding, with room for additional stuff
Okay! Let's move on to SILLY PLOTS!
Supervillain Weekly: In a universe full of superheroes and supervillains, our characters are a team of journalists interviewing supervillains worldwide for the pupular magazine Supervillain Weekly. Sometimes, they are forced to do some questionable things to gain their scoops... but one day, a supervillain demands a personal, live sex show in exchange for an exclusive. How will our characters, who have always been friends but never lovers, react?
Kinks: BDSM and exhibitionism. If you want to pull a brother/sister thing into this, I'll love you all the more.
The Ten Arbitrary Commandments: One day, God drops by Earth and simply changes the ten commandments. Thou shalt covet thy neighbour. Thou shalt steal. In the process, society predictably collapses entirely. What used to be virtues are now sins, and what used to be sins are now virtues. Will our characters be members of a flock for the new age, devoutly following the new commandments? Or just two people trapped in the chaos? Maybe they'll be a pair of extremely confused angels?
Kinks: Take your pick.
And finally, we have MIXED PLOTS!
That Damned Chip: In the distant future, mind-altering chips are a thing, and slavery is on the rise. These behaviour-altering implants are really more control centres and factories for nanobots than actual chips, but they are still the main tool for controlling the enslaved population. However, in this story, the slave's chip is glitched, causing erratic and potentially hilarious behaviour at random times.
Kinks: Dubcon, mind control, master/slave.
Well, That Didn't Go As Planned: An expert in the field of genetics has tried to create the perfect servile species, with a submissive nature comparable to dogs, but with the intelligence and physical characteristics of a human. The idea is to create the perfect pet, and the first specimen is about to finish its accelerated maturing program. All the math is correct, all the data has been triple-checked. What could possibly go wrong, right?
Kinks: More open-ended than it may first appear, since what went wrong is mostly in your hands.
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