Obviously Blue Moon is making me thoughtful! oO
How could that happen? All i wanted from this site was steamy sex scenes...
but here it goes...
Lunatic characters - characters suffering from one (or more) mental illnesses.
Yes or no? And why? What's the appeal playing them? How do you go about playing them? Do your own conditions influence your rp?
Yes or no?
For me it's a tentative "yes". Tentative because I have one (or more *l*) mental illnesses. So for me it's a touchy subject. Which makes parts of the appeal.
Elaborating on that: I have a mild form of Asperger's syndrome (yes. I still call it that, i am not happy with calling it "I am on the spectrum of autistic disorders"). To me, rping is an outlet. Because I can display the rich variety of emotions that I -do- feel.
Just that others do not understand that: "I strongly disagree with your line of thought, do you have considered factors x, y and z?" for me means I am in a full blown RAGE! Really. To me, having to say this sentence means white hot anger... a full blown rage mode... I feel sick inside, my stomach is in knots, and it -feels- as if I am yelling that sentence on top of my lungs.
"I really am not happy with this!" - to me feeling that is "crying my eyes out, feeling as if i will never ever be happy again in my entire life."
For me, that's -extreme- emotions. Usually I "feel" mild amusement towards most everything. To drive me into these emotions it takes a LOT of effort. And so it is hard for me to understand "human emotions". I have spent most of my youth learning to read other people, so while I -know- the person I am talking with is feeling sad (angry, happy, in love... whatever) it took even more fucking effort to understand "why" the person is feeling like that. "Yeah that bitch kissed my ex, I want to TEAR her hair out, I want to kill her, I HOPE both will NEVER be happy again..." erm... yeah. My "emotions" in the same scenario happening to me: "Oh? Ok...."
So... playing deeply emotional characters is... yeah... kind of a "therapy". It's an outlet that allows me to indulge in emotional depth that is mostly closed to me. I imagine feeling white hot rage at things that I usually would give a rat's ass about.
It's "tentative" too, because there's disorders I simply cannot play. I dont wanna. Mostly conditions that are induced, in contrast to conditions that just "are". Like: Schizophrenia. You just are. It's not trauma-induced. It's an imbalance in your brain's chemistry. That's totally fine to play out. It can be fun to play it out in the extremes. (Yeah yeah... I -am- schiziphrenic... so... if I play a character suffering from that I would always approach the extreme, cause "I have it under control, it doesn't inhibit me really, in fact I learned to use it in my advantage" just wouldn't be any fun but my normal life).
DIS on the other hand? Never. You are not born like that. You are made. You have moved through traumatic experiences before the age of 3 (when your personality is "ready"). No. I don't want to play a young woman who has been shattered into piece as a baby. Just... no.
(Whoa. Im realizing how complicated I can be! PTSD is ok, even though it is an "induced" condition. "Depression" on the other hand... where's the fun in that? Even though it is "just there" and not "induced by trauma")
What's the appeal playing them?
That it allows for plot and stories. That it's not "slice of life" but "an adventure". That it causes me to play outside of my comfortzone. That it allows me to do things a "normal" character of mine would not be able to do. That I can lean back and blame it on the disorder if I want to (something I'd never do rt. oO Im a weirdo!) and not take responsibility for an action.
How do you go about playing them?
I research the disorder. I try to get IC hard with lunatic characters. I carefully pick the mental disorder that I feel capable of rping out. I try to have in mind in which "stage" of the disorder the character is. Like... for me it was "normal" to "talk with myself". I didn't understand I am "lunatic" for a long time. It was in my early twenties that I found out that other people do -not- have to discuss decisions with themselves before they can make that decision. I didn't understand why others could say: "Yeah sure, let's meet at 9 pm tonight" in the blink of an eye, while I needed so much time.
"Yeah, but we wanted to take a long hot bath... uh huh sure, but we can take the bath tomorrow morning instead... right, but xy is going to be there too, i don't want to see xy. Oh come on, it's just some fun, couple of drinks and a game of darts, let's just go there. Baaaaaah, but I dont LIKE playing darts. I suck at it. We don't do stuff I suck at. And xy is still going to be there and I don't want to see him. Ok how about we skip our last class today, go home early, take the bath and go out after. We don't play darts, we just have the drinks and cheer the teams on? Ok? No? Oh come on what's the matter with THIS solution now?" - "Ummm... I don't know yet, Ill let you know when I checked my schedule, k?"
Ever since I -know- it isn't normal to have voices talking with you inside your head, it's much easier to handle myself in public. So... I try to consider the "stage" when I play a lunatic. Are they aware they are? Which means... can they handle their disorder or even UTILIZE their madness in their advantage maybe? Or are they helpless victims of their condition still? And I try to keep in mind that it is "normal" for the person to be lunatic. They do not know life could be different. So... while the effect on the other players in the story can be great... the character himself is "just" living "his normal life".
Are they in an episode at that moment? Do they have triggers? What are the triggers? That's basically the stuff I try to consider before I play a lunatic.
Do your own conditions influence your rp?
Quite obviously... yes! Yes they do! *l* After typing up this thread I will need a good hour of discussion of how much they do, if they really do and if I should stop rping maybe.
How could that happen? All i wanted from this site was steamy sex scenes...
but here it goes...
Lunatic characters - characters suffering from one (or more) mental illnesses.
Yes or no? And why? What's the appeal playing them? How do you go about playing them? Do your own conditions influence your rp?
Yes or no?
For me it's a tentative "yes". Tentative because I have one (or more *l*) mental illnesses. So for me it's a touchy subject. Which makes parts of the appeal.
Elaborating on that: I have a mild form of Asperger's syndrome (yes. I still call it that, i am not happy with calling it "I am on the spectrum of autistic disorders"). To me, rping is an outlet. Because I can display the rich variety of emotions that I -do- feel.
Just that others do not understand that: "I strongly disagree with your line of thought, do you have considered factors x, y and z?" for me means I am in a full blown RAGE! Really. To me, having to say this sentence means white hot anger... a full blown rage mode... I feel sick inside, my stomach is in knots, and it -feels- as if I am yelling that sentence on top of my lungs.
"I really am not happy with this!" - to me feeling that is "crying my eyes out, feeling as if i will never ever be happy again in my entire life."
For me, that's -extreme- emotions. Usually I "feel" mild amusement towards most everything. To drive me into these emotions it takes a LOT of effort. And so it is hard for me to understand "human emotions". I have spent most of my youth learning to read other people, so while I -know- the person I am talking with is feeling sad (angry, happy, in love... whatever) it took even more fucking effort to understand "why" the person is feeling like that. "Yeah that bitch kissed my ex, I want to TEAR her hair out, I want to kill her, I HOPE both will NEVER be happy again..." erm... yeah. My "emotions" in the same scenario happening to me: "Oh? Ok...."
So... playing deeply emotional characters is... yeah... kind of a "therapy". It's an outlet that allows me to indulge in emotional depth that is mostly closed to me. I imagine feeling white hot rage at things that I usually would give a rat's ass about.
It's "tentative" too, because there's disorders I simply cannot play. I dont wanna. Mostly conditions that are induced, in contrast to conditions that just "are". Like: Schizophrenia. You just are. It's not trauma-induced. It's an imbalance in your brain's chemistry. That's totally fine to play out. It can be fun to play it out in the extremes. (Yeah yeah... I -am- schiziphrenic... so... if I play a character suffering from that I would always approach the extreme, cause "I have it under control, it doesn't inhibit me really, in fact I learned to use it in my advantage" just wouldn't be any fun but my normal life).
DIS on the other hand? Never. You are not born like that. You are made. You have moved through traumatic experiences before the age of 3 (when your personality is "ready"). No. I don't want to play a young woman who has been shattered into piece as a baby. Just... no.
(Whoa. Im realizing how complicated I can be! PTSD is ok, even though it is an "induced" condition. "Depression" on the other hand... where's the fun in that? Even though it is "just there" and not "induced by trauma")
What's the appeal playing them?
That it allows for plot and stories. That it's not "slice of life" but "an adventure". That it causes me to play outside of my comfortzone. That it allows me to do things a "normal" character of mine would not be able to do. That I can lean back and blame it on the disorder if I want to (something I'd never do rt. oO Im a weirdo!) and not take responsibility for an action.
How do you go about playing them?
I research the disorder. I try to get IC hard with lunatic characters. I carefully pick the mental disorder that I feel capable of rping out. I try to have in mind in which "stage" of the disorder the character is. Like... for me it was "normal" to "talk with myself". I didn't understand I am "lunatic" for a long time. It was in my early twenties that I found out that other people do -not- have to discuss decisions with themselves before they can make that decision. I didn't understand why others could say: "Yeah sure, let's meet at 9 pm tonight" in the blink of an eye, while I needed so much time.
"Yeah, but we wanted to take a long hot bath... uh huh sure, but we can take the bath tomorrow morning instead... right, but xy is going to be there too, i don't want to see xy. Oh come on, it's just some fun, couple of drinks and a game of darts, let's just go there. Baaaaaah, but I dont LIKE playing darts. I suck at it. We don't do stuff I suck at. And xy is still going to be there and I don't want to see him. Ok how about we skip our last class today, go home early, take the bath and go out after. We don't play darts, we just have the drinks and cheer the teams on? Ok? No? Oh come on what's the matter with THIS solution now?" - "Ummm... I don't know yet, Ill let you know when I checked my schedule, k?"
Ever since I -know- it isn't normal to have voices talking with you inside your head, it's much easier to handle myself in public. So... I try to consider the "stage" when I play a lunatic. Are they aware they are? Which means... can they handle their disorder or even UTILIZE their madness in their advantage maybe? Or are they helpless victims of their condition still? And I try to keep in mind that it is "normal" for the person to be lunatic. They do not know life could be different. So... while the effect on the other players in the story can be great... the character himself is "just" living "his normal life".
Are they in an episode at that moment? Do they have triggers? What are the triggers? That's basically the stuff I try to consider before I play a lunatic.
Do your own conditions influence your rp?
Quite obviously... yes! Yes they do! *l* After typing up this thread I will need a good hour of discussion of how much they do, if they really do and if I should stop rping maybe.