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loneiysong
Pulsar
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2012
Well, I figured I have been a member here for so long, I might as well start up a journal here and just let you guys know what is going on in the world that is me so if I start acting weird in my plays you know why. This journal is in no means meant to be an apology or an excuse, it is what it is and that is all. I just need a place, a safe place, to put all my feelings, dark and light, and maybe feel free-- even if it is for a little while.
A few days ago, Trump was elected. Watching that, I was reminded of scenes from "V for Vendetta" when the Prime Minister was elected and then all hell broke loose, people started dying, disease ran rampant, famine, hate, you name it, they got it. But it was in real time. I wanted to wake up, to believe that it was just a dream, but this is a nightmare we have yet to wake from.
Then last night I realized, this isn't a nightmare. Think about it! The cubs winning the world series, a big mean blonde bully is elected president? It is the plot for Back to the Future II! I mean, even Biff was fashioned after Trump!
So today, I woke up to horrifying images and news reports of hate. When I tried to relay it to my mom, she just basically shrugged it off and said, well have you seen what the other races have done. My mom has not been herself lately, but this was taking the cake. I was sickened to my core. I already fight depression, but this was too much. I tried to talk to her, saying threatening children and beating up girls in college for no reason other than race was not right, she kept interrupting me. Then she blamed me for calling her closed minded, which I told her I did not, then she said "you insinuated it".
Now I am peppered with "you really hurt my feelings." So now today I am going to be apologizing for something i didn't do.
Ugh... I need more positivity, but in this vacuum.... well, nothing seems possible.
A few days ago, Trump was elected. Watching that, I was reminded of scenes from "V for Vendetta" when the Prime Minister was elected and then all hell broke loose, people started dying, disease ran rampant, famine, hate, you name it, they got it. But it was in real time. I wanted to wake up, to believe that it was just a dream, but this is a nightmare we have yet to wake from.
Then last night I realized, this isn't a nightmare. Think about it! The cubs winning the world series, a big mean blonde bully is elected president? It is the plot for Back to the Future II! I mean, even Biff was fashioned after Trump!
So today, I woke up to horrifying images and news reports of hate. When I tried to relay it to my mom, she just basically shrugged it off and said, well have you seen what the other races have done. My mom has not been herself lately, but this was taking the cake. I was sickened to my core. I already fight depression, but this was too much. I tried to talk to her, saying threatening children and beating up girls in college for no reason other than race was not right, she kept interrupting me. Then she blamed me for calling her closed minded, which I told her I did not, then she said "you insinuated it".
Now I am peppered with "you really hurt my feelings." So now today I am going to be apologizing for something i didn't do.
Ugh... I need more positivity, but in this vacuum.... well, nothing seems possible.