People who force their ideas onto you through PM.

[Rave]

Okay-- I really don't make many posts on here, but I needed to get a little bit of understanding.

Increasingly, ever since I've updated my thread, I have been getting interest. That is, expected and great and fantastic. Not the point, though.

The point is, more than occasionally now, this happens:

I'm going to use my most recent example-

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I'll get someone PMing me with the usual compliment, something like "This Plot Thread is go great! I'd love to do this and this!" And when I PM them back, they do a 360 degree turn, and suddenly go "Oh but I have this other plot in mind"-- they go on to then explain it, from their own thread, to try convincing me into doing this RP instead. Mind you, this RP they suggest is not remotely similar to what they originally approached me for. As a matter a fact, it is not even similar to -any- of the plots nor O/Os I have listed in my request thread.

Yet, they ignore anything I said in my first PM back to them, and go into complete detail about this other plot they are so insistent on RPing.

Now as politely as possible, to each one that has done this, I have told them about my lack of interest, and in this case specifically the complete void there of. I said that I was flattered, but that my muse is not in this plot, however I would gladly do the one they originally approached me for.

The next PM from this person, as is the case among some of the others as well.

"You'll never hear from me again."

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This is what I'm confused about. I'm trying to understand the thought process behind it. Why look at someone's request thread, come in with what is basically a bait and switch, 'hey I like your idea but here lets do mine that has nothing to do with your requests but whatever', and then proceed to be rude when I tell them I'm not interested?

More so, is this a common occurrence for all you others with request threads? How do you react/handle situations like this?

 

[Mr Quixotic]

I haven't had that exact circumstance occur, but I have had similar. I believe there's an inherent selfishness to many rolepayers, which may not be conscious, or even recognised, where, seeing even one spark of similar preferences or styles, they assume that making an approach means agreement to a (any) collaboration is close to a fait accompli, then focus more on their wants, than that of the person whose request they're responding to. However, why someone would show an interest in one of your plots, before, in the next breath, attempting such an obvious 'bait-and-switch', I've no idea. Simply for the fact that it's too obvious!

As for getting mad when you said no, that isn't uncommon from my experience. I've had people do that with me, when, I, although always happy to compromise and incorporate their preferences/kinks, wouldn't automatically bend totally to their whims, and allow them not to also include what I make so clearly evident I'm looking for. That they had no interest in doing so and, at times, point-blank refused, made me wonder why they approached (based initially, I would have thought, on us having similar interests in regards to what's stated on my request threads) in the first instance.

I think you'll find a number of similarly-themed threads/questions in this forum.

 

[November]

mmm i don't know, i pitch 2-3 alternate ideas to perspective partners all the time, especially if they have a vague story outline and we're working out the dynamics and all that.

but usually it's a situation where i've

1) already decided to work with them regardless and
2) it's usually somewhere in the same vein of what their idea is.

but the specific situation you're talking about, I think you'd have to find the person(s) who did that to see what similarities they saw.

- maybe they're doing that with every thread they think is decent as kind of a cold calling method.

Like I had a couple girls PM with "oh, I like your thread and that Z idea, would you like to do X with me?" - I don't consider that actually wanting to do Z, it's just something nice to say before you ask about X.

So if responded with "I'm flattered but no, let's do Z." They probably expected me to understand that wasn't on the table.

- maybe they see similarities or reasons you might click that you don't see

idk

 

[RedRose]

I've had similar... "Oh I love your thread", but let's say the prince is a dragon and the castle is a spaceship... NOPE

 

[Sugo]

I like to send a inquiry message with development of their idea.

If I see an idea I like I'll PM them and say things like "Have you thought about doing this this way for this idea? or maybe including this?" that sort of thing.

I hope that people don't think this way when I do that

 

[RedRose]

I always welcome developments and suggestions, and actually leave my request threads open enough for a potential partner to really make the story his.
What I don't get is suggesting things that change the whole setting, mood or plot. In that case, they should just send the new story to me, and not say it's my own

 

[Rave]

I like to send a inquiry message with development of their idea.

If I see an idea I like I'll PM them and say things like "Have you thought about doing this this way for this idea? or maybe including this?" that sort of thing.

I hope that people don't think this way when I do that

There's a big difference between suggesting an alternative route to an idea you expressed interest in, and basically just saying that you're interest in an idea only to provide one of your own that had nothing to do with what you PM'd me about.

Suggestion like you say you do are absolutely fine.

 

[RedRose]

^^ yup!
I actually don't even mind cold calls... as long as they bothered to read my main thread

 

[Konashade]

I had someone send me a message with no acknowledgement of reading my request thread. They bombarded me with one of their ideas. No thanks.

 

[Temptationist]

A-FUCKING-MEN.

Why do people feel compelled to butcher your ideas?
I understand a bit of altering here or there, but at the end of the day, if you're not interested in the foundation of what I'm offering, do not PM me.
Usually, however, these people aren't actually interested in your idea/thread and are using your idea/thread as an excuse to expose their own ideas in hopes you'll be interested.
These are normally the same type of people who message users en mass.

 

[RedRose]

So true. If you change everything, it's not MY idea. Which could even be ok, as long as you don't call it such, and respect my interests and especially my well, non-interests.