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Love

Rudolph Quin

Rudolph Quin

Mistaken for some sort of scoundrel
Withdrawn
Joined
Aug 2, 2009
Location
here
Are you in love?

Have you ever been in love with someone? What was it like?

When was the last time someone told you that they loved you?
 
I don't really like the phrase 'in love.' It sounds so passive. You feel love. You do love. Love is an action, something that is active.

I'm way over affectionate, and tell people I love them all the time. My friends, my family, my dog, sometimes even acquaintances (like a study mate who gives me notes I missed, and I tell them I love them). In turn, people who are used to it are often comfortable telling me that they love me too. The last time someone told me they loved me was this morning, from my mom. I'm very close to my family, especially my mom and siblings, so me telling them I love them (and them telling me that they love me) is a common occurrence. Being told that someone loves you is pretty magical, and everyone deserves to be told that there are people who love them. I don't really understand why some people get really weird about being told you love them, or that they're beautiful.

I like that in some other languages, there are different words to describe the different kinds of love (deep affection, brotherly love, passion), as opposed to English, where there's one word that covers it all. Maybe that's why some people react badly to being told 'I love you.' It could mean a multitude of things, and sometimes it's hard to determine what the speaker really means.

But romantically? The last person who told me they loved me in that way was last May. He was a cutie, I liked him a lot. I can't say I love him romantically, though.

Love, in the romantic "in love" kind of way, feels like a lot of work. It also feels like a lot of trust, compromise, understanding, and patience. It feels like sacrifice, acceptance, and responsibility. I wouldn't say it's difficult, but it's not easy either. Love is also enjoying putting the work and effort in, though. I mean, it's pretty magical too, very cute and beautiful and butterflies in the tummy. But the sooner people realize that love isn't just a feeling you have ('falling in love'), the better off most relationships will be. But that's also my personal opinion, and I know some people would disagree.
 
Love. It's one of those bitter sweet aspects of life, though more on the bitter side in my case I suppose. I've been in love before. More than I'd like to count though it's only ever been reciprocated once. Ultimately, the relationship was doomed from the start and I was too dumb to see it coming (Or listen to my dad who was right about her. Should trust his gut more, he's been around the block.)

Despite the bad that comes with it, being around the person I love was one of the greatest experiences for me. I'm currently in love with someone, incidentally my childhood friend. I suppose the root of my problems is I've always loved her but it's never been returned. Despite this, I can't seem to let my feelings go. It could very well be the reason I'm still single (and partially part of wy my first/only relationship failed) because any women who may be interested in me send signals that I'm not receiving because I already feel so in love with someone else (Though without sounding like a 'pity me!' statement, I don't recall ever having a woman hit on me in my life).

I'm going to be honest, I can't remember the last time someone (other than family) told me they loved me. I've only been in one romantic relationship that disaster ended 8 years ago. I'm 27 now, to put that into perspective. *Shrug*
 
I definitely believe in love. Doesn't mean it always works fine, or is forever, or is easy always. But certainly I believe in it, including sometimes in "forever".
 
bad girl said:
Love is a story mothers tell their daughters. Also, Santa Clause is a story mothers tell their daughters. Both are equal to each other.
Click to expand...
Ow_the_edge.jpg


Tryhards aside...

I'm doing better with the whole love thing all the time. Loving my girlfriend, loving my neighbor, sometimes the girlfriend and I get the neighbor drunk and we both 'love' them together~

I'm told I'm loved daily. Not just by my SO, but by close friends, parents, sometimes even at work.

I'm still a wrathful little fuck, but I'm getting better at trusting others to be their best selves. It almost never works out, but that's okay. I don't do it for them, or because I actually expect them to live up to how I see them, I do it for my own mental health.
 
An iffy subject with myself. Though I can honestly say I have my family and friends, romantically that never been something so straight forward and more or less turned me cynical. Luckily I have other bastards we can keep ourselves sane. That the short form as the long form will need copious glasses of liquor. 50/50 kinda feeling.
 
Trygon said:
bad girl said:
Love is a story mothers tell their daughters. Also, Santa Clause is a story mothers tell their daughters. Both are equal to each other.
Click to expand...
Ow_the_edge.jpg


Tryhards aside...

I'm doing better with the whole love thing all the time. Loving my girlfriend, loving my neighbor, sometimes the girlfriend and I get the neighbor drunk and we both 'love' them together~

I'm told I'm loved daily. Not just by my SO, but by close friends, parents, sometimes even at work.

I'm still a wrathful little fuck, but I'm getting better at trusting others to be their best selves. It almost never works out, but that's okay. I don't do it for them, or because I actually expect them to live up to how I see them, I do it for my own mental health.
Click to expand...

Oh please, you make me want to jump off a building.
 
bad girl said:
Oh please, you make me want to jump off a building.
Click to expand...
That's a pretty out-of-proportion response to being told you sound like a 16 year old MRA, but whatever you need to do to escape the endless torment of my slight disapproval, I guess.
 
Let's keep on track, please. My senses are seeing unprovoked attacks. This kind of thing doesn't belong here or anywhere. Thanks. : )
 
I love love but I am not fond of romantic love towards myself. I love romance in theory and watching it happen. I much prefer the platonic and familial versions. ^.^ Often I am quick to tell people that I love them, either joking or serious, just because I have a great appreciation for people in my life. I'm also really close to family right now so last time I was told someone loved me was this morning.
 
My language has different words for romantic ILU and non-romantic, though you can use Je t'aime for family but it is less common, very formal or something. And still more likely to be I love you "a lot", "so much", "you know" I love you... Basically you wouldn't really say je t'aime to your aunt or something, but to your parent moving 1000 kms away? Yea.

Despite how bad it can turn, I love romance ;)
 
I agree with the statement of 'in love' being not that accurate. Love is something that is constantly changing and requires hard work on both parts to be successful.
I love my husband. Some days I love him a little less, most days I love him a little more than the day before.
I love him the most when he's doing things with our kids and he reminds me of why I started to love him in the first place. He's an incredibly caring person and has such a charismatic personality. He's wonderful with our babies and they adore their daddy more than life itself.

I also believe in different types of love. I love my husband on a romantic and sexual level. I love my girl friend (for lack of better wording, she's a friend with benefits) on a sexual and intellectual level. I don't love her romantically. I don't want a romantic relationship with her, and it's pretty mutual which is why our "friends with benefits" arrangement works.

There are some people I love just as a friend, such as my best friend. I love him to pieces. He's an amazing person and we can talk for hours and never want to leave each other's side but I feel nothing romantic or sexual towards him.

I adore love. I think it is one of the most beautiful emotions that people can feel.
 
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