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Meteorite
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2016
First off, if you're interested in talking to me, but not with playing, that's fine. At this point, I'll talk to anyone about anything who can help me get my mind off of this fucking bullshit. I know this thread is different than most threads on here but whatever. No, that doesn't mean we're going to engage in some online relationship. I'm damaged and wounded right now, and talking to anyone would really fucking help.
Let me start off by saying I'm pissed off, angry, I feel betrayed, and I just want to hurt something or somebody in the best way I know how. I don't want to date anybody, I'm not interested in that kind of relationship. I just want an online outlet and I just want someone to use and abuse. OOC, IC, I don't care. I want someone to call me master. I need some fucking authority right now or I'm going to drive myself insane.
Sob story below so people know where I'm coming from and why I feel this incredible need to just throw my authority at somebody. It's pissing me off, not being in control, and I need a way to cope.
So here I am, on deployment, alone, angry, depressed and mad at the world and wanting to take it out on anyone willing to call themselves my pet. As far as the RP goes, I'm looking for descriptive, submissive partners who do not mind talking out of character as well. I'd prefer to chat on kik, though I'd rather play through RP on this forum in the form of PM. To anyone interested in chatting, my KiK is the same as my username here.
PM or KiK me if interested. I need to be in control again. It is driving me crazy.
Let me start off by saying I'm pissed off, angry, I feel betrayed, and I just want to hurt something or somebody in the best way I know how. I don't want to date anybody, I'm not interested in that kind of relationship. I just want an online outlet and I just want someone to use and abuse. OOC, IC, I don't care. I want someone to call me master. I need some fucking authority right now or I'm going to drive myself insane.
Sob story below so people know where I'm coming from and why I feel this incredible need to just throw my authority at somebody. It's pissing me off, not being in control, and I need a way to cope.
Let me start off by saying that I am in the United States Marine Corps. For the last three years, my wife and I have been engaging in BDSM. She's an incredible masochist, both emotionally and physically. And while being addicted to pan is fun in bed, it's not fun when you're trying to maintain a healthy, stable marriage that isn't just damn depressing. We fight a lot because of her volatile behavior and I can't tell if she's genuinely mad at me and if I need to back off or if she just wants me to grab her by the throat and bend her over half the time.
For the last three months, I've been on deployment. It's hard to maintain a relationship overseas, especially when that said someone craves abuse and attention all of the time. Despite the fact that she's a masochist, don't get me wrong; when I met her, my wife was very timid, shy, and afraid of almost everything. She's a kind person, but her addiction for pain has caused us too many issues. I don't want to intentionally hurt the person I am in love with all of the time.
Here's where the bad shit starts. A couple of years ago, I had to get rid of my best friend because he wouldn't stop proclaiming his love for my wife. It made us both very uncomfortable. Well, a few nights ago, I got a picture message from my "best friend" of my wife tied up with the caption "she calls ME master now." I confronted her, hoping this was some cruel joke, but she confirmed that it was true. If I had to guess, she was so starved of attention and of pain that she was willing to reach out to him and he fell for her trap.
I don't want anything to do with either of them anymore. I want to strangle them both, and not in the good way. A part of me thinks this is some ploy or tactic to invoke my ire when I finally get back home from deployment, to give her a night she will never forget, but I'm not going to touch her. I won't give her the satisfaction. All I want is to forget about them both and try to move on with my life, if that's even possible. I'm angry beyond all recognition, I feel betrayed, and I'm incredibly depressed.
I don't know what to do.
For the last three months, I've been on deployment. It's hard to maintain a relationship overseas, especially when that said someone craves abuse and attention all of the time. Despite the fact that she's a masochist, don't get me wrong; when I met her, my wife was very timid, shy, and afraid of almost everything. She's a kind person, but her addiction for pain has caused us too many issues. I don't want to intentionally hurt the person I am in love with all of the time.
Here's where the bad shit starts. A couple of years ago, I had to get rid of my best friend because he wouldn't stop proclaiming his love for my wife. It made us both very uncomfortable. Well, a few nights ago, I got a picture message from my "best friend" of my wife tied up with the caption "she calls ME master now." I confronted her, hoping this was some cruel joke, but she confirmed that it was true. If I had to guess, she was so starved of attention and of pain that she was willing to reach out to him and he fell for her trap.
I don't want anything to do with either of them anymore. I want to strangle them both, and not in the good way. A part of me thinks this is some ploy or tactic to invoke my ire when I finally get back home from deployment, to give her a night she will never forget, but I'm not going to touch her. I won't give her the satisfaction. All I want is to forget about them both and try to move on with my life, if that's even possible. I'm angry beyond all recognition, I feel betrayed, and I'm incredibly depressed.
I don't know what to do.
So here I am, on deployment, alone, angry, depressed and mad at the world and wanting to take it out on anyone willing to call themselves my pet. As far as the RP goes, I'm looking for descriptive, submissive partners who do not mind talking out of character as well. I'd prefer to chat on kik, though I'd rather play through RP on this forum in the form of PM. To anyone interested in chatting, my KiK is the same as my username here.
PM or KiK me if interested. I need to be in control again. It is driving me crazy.
