Hahvoc The Decepticon
Singularity
- Joined
- Mar 4, 2009
All right, people. Let 'em out! Best and Worst Sex stories. Hell, even funny ones would be appreciated! :mrgreen:
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Best and Worst- Sex Stories
- Thread starter Hahvoc The Decepticon
- Start date
Kingschoolyou
Star
- Joined
- May 13, 2009
Best: Went for 2 hours leaving the both of us ready to pass out on each other. Funny part? I was the silent one, and she was screaming louder than Marylin Manson at full blast.
Worst: lasted for 15 minutes because I was too wasted to even think straight, much less get a hard on. Hated that because I later on found out who it was that I was getting ready to sleep with, and she was beautiful.
Worst: lasted for 15 minutes because I was too wasted to even think straight, much less get a hard on. Hated that because I later on found out who it was that I was getting ready to sleep with, and she was beautiful.
Erato
Super-Earth
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2009
Best Sex: An old friends-with-benefits and I decided to do something different and we went to an adult store. After much searching of the place as well as me stealing shy glances at him, the sexual tension building between us, I settled on one of those vibrators that are wireless and with the remote control(Love those things!)
So the whole drive back to his place, he tells me he's not letting me out of the car until I bring myself to orgasm, so there I am, blushing and humiliated a bit but oooooh so very turned on as we drive on city streets and I've got a hand down my pants. We finally pull into the parking lot and I'm just on the verge but he locks he doors and waits for me to climax; people milling about meanwhile and it wasn't long before I bring myself.
Afterwards, he opens the door, slids out then takes me by the hand, casually leads me up to his place and we of course start to kiss and strip one another, making our way to his bedroom. Now, I do like anal sex once in awhile, but I go long, long stretches at a time without sexual intercourse for a myraid of reasons. But there we were, laying on our sides and him working me over nice and hard before he stopped and went to get our little purchase.
Once the batteries were in, he used my fluid to get it nice and lubbed up, went back to pounding away inside of me and then gently pushed the vibrator into my ass much to my shock, then turned it on low..just enough for me not to forget that it was there...needless to say I came hard and multiple times at that. Not one to normally fall asleep right after sex, quite the opposite, but I was out for a good hour at least. <_< And this reads like some terribly written Forum mag, doesn't it? XD
Worse Sex Ever:
Gosh, this one is so hard since there are so many to pick from..~Taps her chin~ Oh yes! Here's a good bad one!
I had just recently moved to Phoenix for the second time, single, young and working at this telemarketing place near my first apartment. A friend of mine there suggested a site, livelinks, for me to meet guys. Deciding that I'd give it a shot, I set up an account and soon found myself amazed at just how easy it was to find someone who was eager for sex. Mind you, I come from a farming community and hit the computer/online thing late.
So there I am, nineteen years old and feeling pretty excited when some guy shows an interest in my profile, we get on the subject of fantasies and I stupidly mentioned I have a bit of a vampire fantasy like many women do and he says he can help me with that. Not realizing of course just what I'd gotten myself into, we agree to have him meet me at my place that friday.
Friday arrives and witholding a few details, I let my friend know what time he's supposed to arrive and tell her if I don't call within an hour, send police to my place.
The appointed time arrives and there's a knock at my door, I open it and ....there stands a grown-ass man wearing a costume that even Bela Lugosi would have been reluctant to don, complete with the horrid attempt at an accent, "Gooood Eeeevening!" Mind you, it's like..July and in Arizona, that amounts to somewhere between, 'Hot as Fuck' and 'Hot as Balls'. So I have to applaude the guy for wearing that much polyester in such conditions, but any excitement I would have felt just kinda died there.
No sex was ever harmed in the making of this horrid experience, but it was very funny needless to say. Especially when I convinced him that I wasn't who he thought I was and then sort of belittled him for showing up at a stranger's house dressed for Halloween at his age. After I was sure he was gone, I couldn't stop laughing.
So the whole drive back to his place, he tells me he's not letting me out of the car until I bring myself to orgasm, so there I am, blushing and humiliated a bit but oooooh so very turned on as we drive on city streets and I've got a hand down my pants. We finally pull into the parking lot and I'm just on the verge but he locks he doors and waits for me to climax; people milling about meanwhile and it wasn't long before I bring myself.
Afterwards, he opens the door, slids out then takes me by the hand, casually leads me up to his place and we of course start to kiss and strip one another, making our way to his bedroom. Now, I do like anal sex once in awhile, but I go long, long stretches at a time without sexual intercourse for a myraid of reasons. But there we were, laying on our sides and him working me over nice and hard before he stopped and went to get our little purchase.
Once the batteries were in, he used my fluid to get it nice and lubbed up, went back to pounding away inside of me and then gently pushed the vibrator into my ass much to my shock, then turned it on low..just enough for me not to forget that it was there...needless to say I came hard and multiple times at that. Not one to normally fall asleep right after sex, quite the opposite, but I was out for a good hour at least. <_< And this reads like some terribly written Forum mag, doesn't it? XD
Worse Sex Ever:
Gosh, this one is so hard since there are so many to pick from..~Taps her chin~ Oh yes! Here's a good bad one!
I had just recently moved to Phoenix for the second time, single, young and working at this telemarketing place near my first apartment. A friend of mine there suggested a site, livelinks, for me to meet guys. Deciding that I'd give it a shot, I set up an account and soon found myself amazed at just how easy it was to find someone who was eager for sex. Mind you, I come from a farming community and hit the computer/online thing late.
So there I am, nineteen years old and feeling pretty excited when some guy shows an interest in my profile, we get on the subject of fantasies and I stupidly mentioned I have a bit of a vampire fantasy like many women do and he says he can help me with that. Not realizing of course just what I'd gotten myself into, we agree to have him meet me at my place that friday.
Friday arrives and witholding a few details, I let my friend know what time he's supposed to arrive and tell her if I don't call within an hour, send police to my place.
The appointed time arrives and there's a knock at my door, I open it and ....there stands a grown-ass man wearing a costume that even Bela Lugosi would have been reluctant to don, complete with the horrid attempt at an accent, "Gooood Eeeevening!" Mind you, it's like..July and in Arizona, that amounts to somewhere between, 'Hot as Fuck' and 'Hot as Balls'. So I have to applaude the guy for wearing that much polyester in such conditions, but any excitement I would have felt just kinda died there.
No sex was ever harmed in the making of this horrid experience, but it was very funny needless to say. Especially when I convinced him that I wasn't who he thought I was and then sort of belittled him for showing up at a stranger's house dressed for Halloween at his age. After I was sure he was gone, I couldn't stop laughing.
Vivid Fizz
Supernova
- Joined
- Oct 17, 2009
My best sex was wonderful. It was with a Marine that was pretty rough and didn't mind getting a little physical. I just love being spanked and hit and having my hair pulled.
My worst sex came from a Cadet in my unit. God. That was a travesty. We were staying in the same building that drill weekend and we decided to go out with one another. It was a fun date, even if he did end up smashing my thumb during an air hockey game, and we got back to the building and started to get frisky on my cot. It lasted a grand total of two seconds. I am not lying. He suited up, pumped three times, and fell on top of me. I was so pissed. On top of that he told EVERYONE we had sex, though not a single person believed him. Thank fucking God.
My worst sex came from a Cadet in my unit. God. That was a travesty. We were staying in the same building that drill weekend and we decided to go out with one another. It was a fun date, even if he did end up smashing my thumb during an air hockey game, and we got back to the building and started to get frisky on my cot. It lasted a grand total of two seconds. I am not lying. He suited up, pumped three times, and fell on top of me. I was so pissed. On top of that he told EVERYONE we had sex, though not a single person believed him. Thank fucking God.