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Sierra-117
Super-Earth
- Joined
- Sep 25, 2014
Hey All!
So I'm Mark (no point talking shite on here, I am going to be baring a lot here) and I decided to do this because
a. It seemed like a good idea and
b. It's a nice place to write down what's going on in my head.
So anyway life hasn't always been good to me. But I'll get to that later. What's really on my mind at the moment is how lonely I am. I've been in relationships for around 5 years since I was 17. I've been single for 8 months now and I have to say it's tough. I miss having someone to cuddle, kiss and spoil, to laugh and joke with and be myself. And by myself I mean my actual self, the goofy, childish guy that I am. And it's nice having someone to care about and being cared about by someone
See the weird thing is this; When I broke up with the girl I was in a relationship with for 3 years I didn't feel much. A kind of sadness it was over but it had needed to be for both of us. Less than a month later I met V (yeah, don't want to give out full names even though she isn't on here) and instantly I could tell there was just something different. There was this instant connection. And like I thought I had loved J (the other girl) but she made me realise I didn't. So when she broke up with me 16 months later I felt such pain. It's like losing a person, it really is. And it took me ages to get over her, but I did. But now I just want to feel something like that again. I just want to be with someone again, someone who likes me and someone I like. I met someone at the weekend but well things just didn't turn out like I planned (or like she planned) so I'm still looking.
But that's the fun of it right? What would be the point of life if everything was always super happy and good. Those things get boring. A friend of mine once said that without the misery, the pain, the hurt and the grief we go through we wouldn't be able to enjoy the little things like a cuddle, a kiss or just sitting down and watching a movie with friends. And that got me thinking about a lot. Last year was great for me; I was in love (honestly one of the greatest experiences on this planet) I had ran for election (I lost, but it was still an amazing week) I had made lots of friends, I had revived a dead society in the University and made it great, I set up a national conference and organisation and I was just generally happy. And without all the shit I went through when I was younger that wouldn't have seemed as great. And I know that the loneliness I am feeling now will make my next relationship all the better. I've never felt like this before so it's new. Even though it sucks it's still something I can look back on when I've found someone and go "Ahh, that made this feel more amazing"
To end on a positive note for the past 5 New Year's at midnight I've had a kiss. I mightn't have anyone now but I plan to have a New Year's Eve kiss this year and continue that streak. Because hell, we all have to have goals right?
So I'm Mark (no point talking shite on here, I am going to be baring a lot here) and I decided to do this because
a. It seemed like a good idea and
b. It's a nice place to write down what's going on in my head.
So anyway life hasn't always been good to me. But I'll get to that later. What's really on my mind at the moment is how lonely I am. I've been in relationships for around 5 years since I was 17. I've been single for 8 months now and I have to say it's tough. I miss having someone to cuddle, kiss and spoil, to laugh and joke with and be myself. And by myself I mean my actual self, the goofy, childish guy that I am. And it's nice having someone to care about and being cared about by someone
See the weird thing is this; When I broke up with the girl I was in a relationship with for 3 years I didn't feel much. A kind of sadness it was over but it had needed to be for both of us. Less than a month later I met V (yeah, don't want to give out full names even though she isn't on here) and instantly I could tell there was just something different. There was this instant connection. And like I thought I had loved J (the other girl) but she made me realise I didn't. So when she broke up with me 16 months later I felt such pain. It's like losing a person, it really is. And it took me ages to get over her, but I did. But now I just want to feel something like that again. I just want to be with someone again, someone who likes me and someone I like. I met someone at the weekend but well things just didn't turn out like I planned (or like she planned) so I'm still looking.
But that's the fun of it right? What would be the point of life if everything was always super happy and good. Those things get boring. A friend of mine once said that without the misery, the pain, the hurt and the grief we go through we wouldn't be able to enjoy the little things like a cuddle, a kiss or just sitting down and watching a movie with friends. And that got me thinking about a lot. Last year was great for me; I was in love (honestly one of the greatest experiences on this planet) I had ran for election (I lost, but it was still an amazing week) I had made lots of friends, I had revived a dead society in the University and made it great, I set up a national conference and organisation and I was just generally happy. And without all the shit I went through when I was younger that wouldn't have seemed as great. And I know that the loneliness I am feeling now will make my next relationship all the better. I've never felt like this before so it's new. Even though it sucks it's still something I can look back on when I've found someone and go "Ahh, that made this feel more amazing"
To end on a positive note for the past 5 New Year's at midnight I've had a kiss. I mightn't have anyone now but I plan to have a New Year's Eve kiss this year and continue that streak. Because hell, we all have to have goals right?